My Wife Is Sleeping With Her Son’s Friend! | KARAMO
In this episode of KARAMO, host Karamo mediates a tense, intervention‑style conversation between Kara and her husband Larry, who have been together for 17 years and share a 23‑year‑old son. Kara alleges that Larry accuses her of cheating with her son’s 18‑year‑old friend, prompting a heated discussion about trust, control, and past abuse. Larry’s controlling tactics include full access to Kara’s phone, home cameras, and multiple door locks, while Kara describes being monitored to the point of having to announce bathroom trips. The couple recounts a history of occasional domestic abuse, police involvement, and codependent dynamics. Larry reveals a recent relapse into paranoia after stopping and restarting Suboxone, a medication for opioid dependence, which he denies being an addiction. Karamo conducts a “phone‑unlock” investigation, confirming that Kara’s phone, texts, apps, and emails contain no evidence of infidelity, though a suspicious message to Larry is shown. The host highlights the toxic cycle of paranoia and codependency, urging Larry to seek addiction and mental‑health treatment and offering backstage therapist resources. Kara expresses uncertainty about leaving, while Larry claims he will get help. The episode concludes with Karamo’s broader warning about abusive relationships and a hotline for substance‑abuse support.
Chapters
He's accusing you of cheating with your son's 18-year-old friend?
Yes. Why? At my daughter's baby shower, I guess he looked at me wrong and it's been, like I seen the way you guys looked at each other.
The son looked at you?
The son's friend. The son's friend. Yeah. I seen the way you guys looked at each other and it's been that since.
What does your son think about all this?
He's angry. He won't have much to do with me. He won't come over. He doesn't call me. He doesn't.
I'm so sorry. So is your son, is this his father?
No.
Okay, this is not his father, okay. Have you ever cheated?
No.
Never? No. Okay then, how long have you been together again? You said 17 years.
Yeah, we was together a month before we got married.
Got it, and, oh, one month?
Yeah, we've been friends since we was 12.
12 years old, okay then. How many children do you two have?
One.
One child?
Yes.
And you have other children who are not his?
Yes, correct.
So my producers say your son is not speaking with you until you leave Larry, is that true?
Correct.
Wow. So your son's 23 and you've been with Larry for 17 years. So he's known Larry his entire life. Oh yeah. And yet he doesn't want you to be with him.
No.
That's very telling.
Yeah.
What is it that your son is seeing that would make him not want his mother to be with the person she's been with for 17 years?
He just feels he's very controlling. Okay.
Has your relationship ever been abusive?
A few times.
A few times. Okay. And this is why your son was in the house, obviously.
Basically. Yeah.
Okay then. Do you two share phone passcodes?
We don't have passcodes, but he has full access to my phone.
Full access.
Full access anytime he wants.
And do you have full access to his phone?
For the most part. All my information, my Facebook, everything is signed into his phone. So he can get, he gets everything. He's got our phones paired, so he gets all my text messages.
Whose choice was that?
I said it to think that it would help ease his mind that I'm not doing wrong, but it has done no, it's done nothing.
Do you have cameras in your home?
Yes, well, we did, but Sunday he kind of threw a little tantrum and I unplugged them.
Got it.
So I told him, you know, I'm about to be 41 in 10 days and I'm tired of being babysat, so.
You told my producers that you have to hold your pee. What do you mean by that?
Well, at night, so if I wake up in the nighttime to go to the bathroom, I can't just get up and go to the bathroom. I mean, he says that I can, But to make him feel like, hey, I'm not, like I don't want him to wake up, me not be there. So I wake him up and say, hey, I'm gonna go to the bathroom, just so he knows where I'm at. So he doesn't think that I'm in another room with another man, 'cause that's when he thinks I'm sleeping with other men is when he's asleep at night. In the house while he's asleep.
Why was there a lock on your bedroom door?
So I couldn't get out and sleep with other men at night.
So he put a lock on your door?
He put several locks on my doors, yeah.
Several locks.
Okay.
We're here today because we're unlocking your phone, right?
Yes.
Was this your choice to lock the phone?
Yes.
It was your choice to unlock the phone?
Yes.
Because you wanna prove to him you're not doing anything.
Yeah.
Got it. Are we unlocking his phone?
We didn't until this morning and then we're like, let's, and that's a big thing too. I know he talks to girls when he thinks I'm doing wrong. So yeah, he does.
Okay. So if there's nothing in your phone, do you think it would change anything?
He says it will.
He says it will.
He says it will. Yeah, because, To him, I delete the messages. You guys will get the deleted messages. So he'll see that there was never a message, so. Mm, mm.
All right, let's meet Larry to hear his side of the story. So everyone, welcome Larry to the show. Hi, Larry.
Hi.
How are you doing?
Fine.
Good. Why do you accuse your wife?
There's just stuff that's happened behind my back that I'm pretty sure stuff goes on.
Like what?
Like her, she'll be sneaking on her phone or like turn the phone towards me to where I can't see it. Or there's been times like she'll kick me out and then she turns off the camera. Or like, I feel like if you're not doing nothing wrong, why you need to turn it off?
Okay, so the minute that he walked out here, I was watching, your head went down, you started looking down, you have not looked at him. Why is that?
That's anytime I'm in public, I look down just because I don't want him to say, "Why are you looking at that guy?" And that happens a lot. At the airport, there was a, to me, he looked like he was about 14 or 15, and he's like, "Why do you keep fucking that boy?" And I'm like, "What are you talking about?" Is that true?
I didn't say it in them words, no.
What words did you use?
I asked her why she keep looking at him. I didn't say none of that.
Okay, but you were wondering why she was looking at a man?
Right.
Do you think that she was trying to extinct him?
She does that a lot too. She'll like stare off to somebody's direction and when I bring it to her attention, she acts like I'm stupid.
So that's why when I'm in public or anywhere, I'm constantly looking at the ground because even driving, if I'm looking out the window and there's a man walking on the sidewalk, I'm automatically looking at that man.
Got it. She said that you also have access to her phone, that you get her text messages, that you do all that, correct?
But it's like she turns them off when she's ready to text somebody. Like the app—
Yeah, he thinks I turn it off.
Will go blank and I can't even get on it.
Yeah.
Okay. Are you two still intimate?
Very.
Very.
Very.
Larry, what changed 4 years ago to make you act this way?
When I stopped my medicine and started it back, That's when things started changing.
Got it. So you were on medication for something. Did you get addicted to it?
Yeah, it was actually Suboxone.
Got it.
Okay then. And so you stopped cold turkey and now you're on a different medication?
Right.
Okay. It's interesting, Larry, because you seem bashful and shy. You seem very innocent and childlike in nature, but we clearly hear from this what you're saying, what she's, confirming is that that's not your behavior other places.
And I've had a bad childhood too.
Mm-hmm, got it. And you knew about that 'cause you were there from 12.
Oh yeah, yeah.
And I've had a hard life, I have to say.
Mm-hmm, I understand that.
That's one of the reasons too that I haven't walked away from him or divorced him because I know him.
'Cause you know what he's been through.
I know what he's been through and I know the real him. So it makes it hard, but some days it's like I give up. I'm tired of fighting for my life and I feel every day like I'm fighting for my life.
Larry, why doesn't her son like you?
Just the jealousy.
The jealousy, okay. 'Cause she also said there was some abuse early on. Were you abusive as well?
Well, not that abusive, but yeah.
A few times, yeah.
Okay, what does not that abusive mean?
Like it's, he don't, go ahead.
I didn't beat on her or nothing like that.
He scratched me. The neighbors did call the cops. He got in trouble for domestic, but it wasn't like he physically beat me or anything like that. One other time I think he smacked, open-handed smacked me in the face, but besides that, it's not like he's physically, like he doesn't beat on me like my son thinks that he does.
What are you thinking about over there, Larry? 'Cause I saw you kind of checked out and you were playing with your nails. What were you thinking about?
Nothing.
No, talk to me. What was in your head right there?
Just about her son not liking me.
And what is, where did you go in your mind while she, when you were thinking about that? What did you think? I wanna know your train of thought.
Like, I want my family back, pretty much.
You want your family back. Interesting. Larry, why don't you feel like you can trust her? She's your best friend.
'Cause she's cheated on her exes before and that's, I cheated on my kids' dad with him.
With him.
Yeah.
So your wife came here so that she can unlock her phone to prove to you, right?
Right.
Because you wanna know what's in her phone, even though you already have access to her phone.
Right.
You wanna see if there's something deleted that I can find.
Right.
Okay, got it. Well, it's time to unlock her phone.
Unlock, unlock, unlock, unlock, unlock, unlock.
Kara, we unlocked your phone. All right, here we go. Lara, you wanna know if Kara has been on any dating apps. She says she has not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her apps and found that she is telling the truth. Told you. Lara, you wanna know if she has been texting with any of the 5 specific men. She says she's not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her texts and DMs, again, both are clear. Present and deleted, and found she is telling the truth.
Told you. See, all this hell that you've put me through, literally I have lived a life of hell the past 4 years, like I was in prison. And I've told you the truth the whole time.
Larry, you wanna know if Kara has any suspicious emails with any other men. She says she does not. My unlock the phone investigator searched her emails, the ones that are in there and those that are deleted, and found she's telling the truth.
Told you.
All right, so my investigator did tell me that he found some interesting communication between you two that he wants me to see right now that I haven't seen yet.
Oh Lord.
Okay, so this is you to Larry saying, call me, call me, call me, call me, call me, call me.
Yeah.
Okay, that's a lot. My sexy boo. Okay, yes, no, ask for the code. You won't give it to the door, it's being locked. Do you want a blanket?
That's when I made him leave.
You left him, but you were asking him if he wanted that blanket.
Yeah, because I didn't want him to, I told him I'd unlock my van, you could sleep in the van. I don't want him to be out in the cold, but yeah. I think I was asking for the code because—
The code to what?
His TikTok, because I have to give him all my information. When he gets mad at me, he gets on TikTok and starts talking to girls and says, I wouldn't do this if it wasn't what you're doing.
Is that true, Larry? When you get mad at her, you get on TikTok You get on TikTok and start, or you get on social media?
When I think she was cheating, yeah, then I would.
So when you think she's cheating, you then go speak to girls?
I never talked to another female before all this, and I've never cheated on her or nothing like that.
I've explained to him that talking to girls, telling them they're sexy, or I'd fuck the shit out of you, that's cheating.
Do you say that to women, Larry?
I have one time said that.
"See, like that right there, you don't answer me right away. I know you're talking to someone else. I'm leaving, Larry. Last chance, okay? Hope you can live with this decision. I didn't do anything to deserve all this I go through. On blank's life, you don't answer the phone, Larry. I'm leaving you and I won't come back." So Larry, my producers asked you to unlock your phone today in the green room and you agreed last minute. My investigators searched your phone and found that you are not communicating with any other women, "But there is this one thing that they found that they want me to see. Larry, you think he wants blank your wife? Don't even think about how he can die at aim and he's going to die with none of the family talking to him because you believe he wants in your head." So—
That's his brother.
Your brother was passing away and he—
He's sick, very sick. And Larry thinks that, so when we was split up and he lived with his brother, I went to stay the night with him But his brother's, whatever you call her, don't like me. So I slept in the car with him and he thinks that in the middle of the night, or thought in the middle of the night, I got outta the car and went in the house and slept with his brother. So I couldn't communicate with his brother because of that.
Yeah, I do. Mm-hmm.
Okay. So there's a couple things at play here. There's extreme paranoia because of your addiction and there's codependency on your part.
Oh yeah.
And those two things are a deadly pair because the thing is that you're gonna be so codependent to his behavior that it used to be and so afraid to leave that you're gonna continue to just be in this cycle. And then you, because of paranoia, that you need to get serious help. And I'm gonna be real with you, you are going to need to talk to someone about an addiction specialist to figure out how to get you off of this prescription addiction. And you know that. You know it's frying your brain in front of us. We're seeing it. And I'm being real. It is literally reverting you back to a childlike state in the way that you're acting. You know that, right?
I tell him that all the time. I'm like, tell him you're 41 years old, you're not 12. Quit acting like a child. And it's like I wanna grab a hold of him and shake the shit out of him. Like, what is wrong with you?
Well, see, the funny part is I wanna grab you and shake the shit out of you.
Yeah. Yeah, he got mad at the hotel last night. He got mad.
No, seriously, because when you say things, and I gotta say this to you. So when you keep saying things like, I know the real him, I know the real him, girl, I need you to wake up your eyes, this is the real him. You're an addict and being an addict has changed you. That's not the case.
That's not the case.
Well, I will tell you that is the case.
I'm not an addict. No, I'm not.
What would you define an addict as?
I take Suboxone as prescribed. I'm not an addict.
So you know there are people who are.
I got off the pain pills for the Suboxone. That's why.
Okay.
I'm on the Suboxone, it's from pain pills.
Okay. Well, I will tell you this. The behavior that is going on with him is, and you're seeing glimpse inside of where you see things where you're like, that's him. But this is who he is. He's someone who's paranoid and he is someone who is going to make both of your lives miserable. Both of your lives. I wish that you could go back to the man that you used to be, but you're going to have to take some clear steps to get back to that man. Because right now what really is even worse than all of the situation between you two is that you're choosing this bad relationship over your children. And I gotta ask you, like, as a mother, when do you grapple with that? If your children all walked away from you right now and said, "We're not talking to you," would this be worth it?
I would leave. I would leave. Okay. When I think that if he steps up and says, "Okay, I realize that I have a problem, I'm gonna go get some help." You just heard him say to me he doesn't have a problem. Yeah.
You just heard him say that.
Well, I mean, you're saying addiction problem. No, I don't have an addiction problem.
Okay, then what problem do you think you have, sir?
I can go get help, but I'm not gonna.
Okay, then what problem do you think you have, sir? I'm here. I will take that back wholeheartedly. I'm not here to put labels on you or titles, so I apologize wholeheartedly.
Why, you don't even know me to say that.
I think it's more—
Well, I do know behavior. I do know behavior.
I think it's more of a mental health issue than anything.
Okay, so what problem do you think he has that he needs to get help for?
Mental health. Mental health.
Okay, and do you think he's going to get that help? Do you want to get help for your mental health?
Yeah.
You do? Okay, so have y'all tried to get help for the mental health?
We've been talking about it. He's been doing some research on some different medicines. He pretty much told me, if you prove that you didn't do wrong and then this is all in my head, then I'm gonna go get help.
Okay, she's proved that she didn't do anything wrong. So how do you feel about this now?
I'm gonna go get help.
My plan is that he's going to get help in the morning.
That's the plan?
Yeah.
Do you trust her now?
Yeah.
You do? Okay. Well, I wish you both the best of luck. You have your answers now. You understand where he is. You're saying that you have a plan to get help after this. We have a therapist backstage who can actually talk to you. And I hope that you make the right decisions for yourself and your family, for both of you. Thank you. If you need recommendations, our therapist backstage can give you recommendations, okay? I wish you all the best of luck. It breaks my heart because of the fact that she's deciding not to leave. And the thing is, I could try to give her a boost in her self-esteem. I could try to help her understand her worth. And as you shaking your head right here in the front row, we know it ain't happening. We know it ain't happening 'cause she don't want it. Yeah, she don't want it. She don't want it yet. And this is the sad part. Now I'm bringing this up for y'all is because if you have somebody in your life who's in these type of relationships, Sometimes you have to know, I gotta walk away. If her own children can't get her outta this, what I'm gonna do for her? If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, you are not alone. Help is always available. Please call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration hotline at 1-800-662-HELP.
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