No More Jokes, Who's My Dad? | KARAMO

When did you start to suspect that you and your sister Champagne didn't share the same father?

Well, growing up, there was always jokes saying like this other guy might be my father, that I look like him and his kids. I never took it serious though.

Yeah. Who would say these jokes?

Family members. Anybody around. I never took it serious, but I was 13 years old and I'm like, hey, these jokes are a little too serious for me.

Yeah.

So I asked my mom and she was like, getting upset, like, "Hey, stop asking me that." Like, they're jokes, they're jokes for a reason. And then at 15 years old, she finally was like, "Hey, I'm sorry it took so long, but this other guy might be your father." [Speaker:KARAMO] Wow. [Speaker] But it's pretty much outta my hands.

[Speaker] Wow.

[Speaker] Yeah.

[Speaker] At 15 years old, after hearing those jokes forever, she just comes out the blue and says that. How'd that make you feel?

[Speaker] Kinda upset, 'cause why did you wait so long to tell me? And then when I asked you, you pretty much just brushed it underneath the rug like they're just jokes. You could've told me the truth then.

Yeah, I mean, we spoke to your mother a little earlier and here's what she had to say about all of this.

I was with two different men before I got pregnant with Paris. I was messing with one guy and in the middle of that, I slept with Champagne's father one time. When I got pregnant, I decided to get back in a relationship with Champagne's father, but I told the other guy this baby might be his. He never did anything for Paris. Not one thing. I told Paris that her and Champagne share the same father. At the time, it seemed like the easiest thing to do. But the truth is, I have no idea who the father is. Paris looks like both men. When she was younger, she looked like the other guy. But now she look like Champagne's dad. I just don't know.

All right. Has your mother ever tried to get a DNA test?

No, when she told me the truth finally, she was like, I told you, now it's up to him basically to get the test done.

Wow. Have you ever met the other potential father?

He's always been around. He's an extended family friend. There was never a title to it though. He was just always around.

So you've seen him your entire life?

Yeah.

Wow. And when was the last time you've spoken to him?

3, 4 years ago. I ran into him and he was like, hey, let's, "Let's get this done, it's overdue." And I'm like, "Okay." He was like, "Look around, I'll pay for it." And then he got married and ghosted me.

Wow, okay. Do your siblings all know who their fathers are?

Yes, all of them. I'm the only one that doesn't.

Doesn't know, yeah.

I'm sorry.

No, take your time, you're okay. Here you go, love.

I told myself I wasn't gonna get emotional. It's okay. When I see other girls with their fathers, I'm jealous.

Yeah.

I wanted that.

'Cause you and Champagné's father didn't have a close relationship or you did?

No.

You did at all?

Not at all. He was in and out. He was in and out. And every time we tried to build a relationship, it just never worked out. It was always one-sided.

And do you think it's because he knew Deep down he did.

Deep down I feel like he knew. 'Cause he always heard stuff about another man being my father.

Got it.

Yeah.

Got it, got it, got it. So why is this DNA test important to you?

I'm 23. I feel like it's time, it's long overdue. I deserve closure. Yeah, you do. I have a son. His dad's in his life. I'm breaking the cycle as we go along.

Good for you, good for you.

And I just feel like he deserves to know his grandparents. He deserves to know I don't know where he comes from.

Do you want Champagne's father to be your father?

No.

You don't?

It's not a good relationship.

Yeah.

At all.

Yeah. Do you think that if he was your father that it would help fix the relationship?

Not at all. I feel like he doesn't want to be in my life.

I got it.

And that's on you because I'm an amazing person.

Yes. Well, it's time to hear from your sister. Please welcome Champagne to the show. Hi Champagne, thank you for being here. Take a seat for me.

Stop.

I know.

How do you feel about what was just said?

It's a little frustrating to see how emotional she still gets over it. It took my mom so long to actually finally tell her the truth about the situation. So it's definitely frustrating seeing how bad it hurts her.

I feel like she honestly wasn't gonna ever tell me.

Yeah.

So I feel like she—

I don't think she took the joke serious either.

No, I don't think she took me knowing serious.

Yeah.

At all.

So how did you first learn that Paris might not have the same father as you?

Honestly, I learned a few years before my mom told her the truth. Like she said, the other potential father is an extended family friend. So the jokes is pretty much what started it. But the older siblings and everybody did eventually come out and tell me the truth about it. So—

We're gonna, I wanna stop right here quick because I wanna like model something for you all that hopefully other people can do at home. Adults saying things about the stability of a child is never a joke. It was insensitive comments. So when we're referring to it, let's not refer to them as jokes no more. Say when adults are making insensitive comments, I found out. When the adults around me were making insensitive comments, I had to question my mother. When the adults around me were making insensitive comments, I felt alone. Because I think sometimes we allow behavior in our families to go on for so long because we mislabel them. We call it a joke. We say, "Oh, they were just joking. They were just playing around." That's not what they was doing.

And it's never a joking matter.

Obviously.

For me.

Exactly. And clearly we see that, the emotions here. And so I'm using that, you know, obviously that was in the past and we're here today to get the results. But for somebody else at home where everybody's saying, "Oh, it's just joking." No, no, no. Label it what it is. And maybe that will wake people up. So do you have a good relationship with your dad, Champagne?

I used to. Used to, now not so much. But my relationship with him and his side of the family has always been a lot stronger and more solidified than Paris's.

Got it.

We never really knew why, but honestly I kind of feel like—

I feel like it's because he honestly just didn't wanna be a part of my life. And I feel like—

So the feelings he should have projected on, had for your mother, he projected on you.

They were on me every time.

Yeah, I feel like he did that with the both of us in different ways. With me, we had a test. So I feel like he projected just how much I am like my mom and he projected that on me, which is why over the years our relationship became very strange. And with her being the fact that there wasn't an actual test, even though they always told us there was, I definitely feel like he did that without meaning to, of course. But I do feel like his family—

He's a grown man, he knew. He knew his feelings. He knew that he was—

Yes and no though. You gotta think about how young he was when they had me.

But what about now though? He still acts the same way. There's nothing changed.

Yeah, he's been in prison.

He's going to prison right now?

No, he's out now. He's been in and out of prison our entire life. So I kind of feel like that has made him stuck in his ways. 'Cause he actually, he still looks at us and treats us like children too. And I feel like him being stuck in that mindset has a lot to do with it.

Father title and he doesn't deserve it. He hasn't been there at all.

Well, before we get to the DNA truth, Paris and Champagne's mother Tracy is joining us remotely. Tracy, are you there?

Yes, I'm here. Hey.

I wanna ask you, is there anything you would've done different?

Yes, most definitely. And it's not about sleeping with both men because evidently it happened separate times. It's just the period when It only takes one time.

Is there anything you would have done different in the communication with your daughters?

Well, Paris, yes, most definitely. I would have let Paris know when she was appropriate age of the situation. I was trying to get the situation resolved before it even got this far. But I did my part to try to get the test.

What's an appropriate age?

I don't know, Paris.

When she started asking questions, maybe?

Parents always ask questions.

Yeah, 'cause everybody else knew.

Because her dad was never around. He wasn't there for the birth. He wasn't there to sign the birth certificate. He wasn't there to change diapers, none of that.

You said her dad, so you're convinced that this other man, not Champagne's father, is her father?

I'm convinced Champagne's father is her father.

Okay.

Like, I'm honestly, 'cause every time Paris asked me.

Even though it was just the one time?

I told her.

Yes, I told her every time she asked me, I said, Paris, is your father.

What makes you so sure?

Right, if you only slept with my dad one time, what makes you so sure that he's the one?

I'm not sure, but my heart says it is. My gut says it is.

You think it is? Is it just because it's easier that way?

Most definitely not. Neither one of them ever did anything for Paris, so it's not easy. This whole situation—

They never did anything, but you don't think the situation would be easier considering that the other potential father had a whole life that he had going on as well? You think that's why?

Paris was a secret for a reason.

I'm sorry to hear that.

I'm sorry.

I mean, it's the truth. Paris was a secret for a reason. He was in a whole relationship. He had 5 other kids. I wasn't trying to hide nothing. He was. So we just rolled with it, Paris.

Okay. Champagne and Paris, is there anything you wanna say to your mother before we get to this DNA truth? No.

No.

I will tell you this, Tracy. I'm not here to judge you for your past. It's not my job. I'm here to only encourage healthy first steps as you go forward. And what I would like to encourage is I want you to think about the language you use about the time period that things were inappropriate comments were being said to the girls. And even now, because I think sometimes as adults we speak truth so freely and not realizing the impact that it makes on children. You know, for instance, for instance, like, You know, I know that you're like, this is what this other guy did. This is how he saw the situation, using the word secret. But you have to understand that those words impact your daughter significantly. And so I would just encourage you to make sure even after this DNA truth, when you talk about how you responded in the past and when you talk to her about the things that are happening, take a moment to think about the language you use because The relationship you two have, I can tell, has been damaged by this, but it can be rebuilt if there's healthy and honest communication that doesn't hurt or retrigger them. So I just encourage that. I just wanna give you a little something because neither of you deserve to hear things or have things said, even though it's the adult's truth, you're still children that deserve to be protected. But I think now it's time that we get to the DNA truth. You got this. Huh. Paris, you have had questions because of the inappropriate comments that adults have been saying. Your mother's also shared that she had an affair with Champagne's father for one night, and that has caused doubts for her as well. So in this envelope is the DNA truth that you've been waiting for. This is not my truth to open, it is yours.

Just know, no matter the results, there's no half-siblings. You are my sister.

Oh, I'm scared. It's okay. I mean, no matter what, I'm still gonna be me. I've gone this far without knowing, you know. I just want closure. I feel like we all need closure from this. A long overdue process. So definitely, Paris Champagne's father is your biological father.

I know it's not the best results, but at least you You know, I know.

I know there's a sense of relief but also pain. 'Cause you know the truth, but also it also adds more questions to why did you treat me that way? Definitely. I understand, I understand.

At least you know though.

How do you feel knowing the truth though?

Like you said, relief because it's been too long. Yeah. I'm 23, like it shouldn't have taken all these time for me to have a family of my own, for me to know.

Yeah. Well, like Champagne said, there is no half siblings. This is your sister, and you now know that you two share the same last name, that this is your biological sister. Yeah. Tracy, how does it make you feel knowing that you now have the truth, that Champagne's father is also her father?

I'm happy for Paris. Other than that, it's not gonna change nothing. That's the reason why that was part of the secret.

Got it.

It's not gonna change nothing.

I will say this to you. I'm pretty good at facilitating relationships between fathers and daughters. And I'm not sure where he is mentally or emotionally. I wanna give an invitation to you. I'm not here to judge you or judge your past, but I am here to help you realize that the relationship you have with your daughters is strained. And now that we know these are both your biological daughters, I wanna invite you here to the show. If there is support that you'd like to get in rebuilding this relationship, I wanna be here to give you all that.

Thank you.

Because part of that closure is now that we got this first step in closure, there needs to be a second step in that closure.

Definitely.

And if you're open to it and y'all are open to it, I'm here to support. Yeah.

Thank you.

But I'm so thankful that you got this answer.

Thank you.

And that you got this first step because you deserve that more than anything.

Thank you.

Yeah, you're welcome.