In this YouTube Q&K episode, host Karamo invites a family—father, his two teenage daughters (Mariah and Messiah), and the mother—to discuss tension arising from the father's new girlfriend, who the daughters feel is excluding them. The father explains his recent breakup after a 20‑year marriage and his desire to move on, while the mother shares her perspective on the family's history. Karamo mediates, emphasizing that the core issue is the father's communication and leadership, not the girlfriend herself. He advises the father to openly introduce his partner to his daughters, set clear boundaries against disrespect, and involve the children early in any new relationship. He also calls on the mother to reinforce respect and model healthy conflict resolution. Throughout, Karamo stresses the importance of consistent, respectful communication from both parents, the need for the father to protect his daughters' emotional safety, and the role of the mother in supporting that process. The episode concludes with Karamo praising the family's willingness to discuss the problem and encouraging continued open dialogue in future sessions.
Chapters
All right, you know, a lot of y'all have questions for me, so I'm gonna take it to the comments and we're gonna do something that I like to call Q and K. So anybody in my audience got a question for me?
Hey, Karamo.
Hey, how y'all doing?
I'm Mariah. This is Messiah. We're sisters.
Y'all are beautiful.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Okay, so I have like, well, I want your opinion. You know, how would you feel if your dad's girlfriend or whatever the case doesn't want you around him or doesn't like when he's spending time with you or, you know, Yeah, that's my dad.
Dad, you might as well, your daughters are here.
You know, so.
To be very honest with you, my solution is gonna be, it really means nothing about the girlfriend. It's all about your dad. And so since dad is here, the question is, is that if your girls feel uncomfortable about comments that your girlfriend is making, what are you doing about it?
This right here is serious, Karamo.
Okay, so what's going on? So you have a girlfriend. Yes. And she doesn't like you to spend time with your daughters?
It's not really that.
Okay.
First it starts off with their mother. The reason why I'm not with their mother.
Okay.
I've been with their mother 20 years. So all the things that I done been through with her tore me down, tore me apart. Now they got me ready to cry up here. Made me move on.
Yeah.
You understand? So since it made me move on, I moved on to find, I guess, sanity.
Okay.
She pushed me away to find love somewhere else.
Got it.
Pushed me on to make me feel like somebody cared.
And I gotta tell you, I'm happy that you have found that for yourself because I believe that for you as a man, you deserve to find someone who's gonna love you and value you. But at the same rate, as you found the love for yourself, it should never diminish the love that your daughters feel or that your daughters ever feel that someone is getting in between you and their relationship. And so as much as I respect and I appreciate you finding that, your daughters are saying that the woman you're with makes them feel as if they're not welcomed. So for you, though you have that love, what do you say to her when your daughters tell you this?
I tell 'em, I tell her all the time, like, they're my daughters. But a long story short, my daughters looked at this person as they don't want me with her because I've been so long, all they know is their mother.
You shaking your head, tell me.
No.
What's your thoughts?
That's wrong. The disrespect that his girlfriend brung upon from the beginning, you feel me?
This is a simple, My producer's saying mom's in the audience too. Mom, you, everybody, listen, everybody, let me show y'all how, let me tell y'all how messy my family in the audience is. Everybody's talking about this the mama right here, this the mama.
You see all the, why y'all?
Hey mom.
I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.
See, this is what we do here. Families come and we solve their family issues. So mom, so what's going on here?
It's a lot going on, however, That's my kid's father. I have 4 kids by this man. My oldest is 21. At the end of the day, we've been together for a long time. When what happened between me and him, it happened, it happened. My kids didn't, his girlfriend didn't respect them. She didn't respect me. And by that, my kids didn't respect her. But again, it starts with their father. He's the only one that can fix it and make them feel like they felt before.
I'm gonna ask you a question. Are you happy that he's found somebody?
I mean, I'm happy for him. If he's doing what he wanna do, that's fine. However, me and him not together. But if she showed respect and she was mature, then I would say, okay, that's fine. We can all get along. I try to get along. I try. I can tell you, I try all the time. But I get her disrespect, and by she be disrespectful, he allows it. And that's where everything break down at.
I get it. I'm gonna tell you this. The thing that I realized is that there's communication and language that needs to change on both parts. Dad, for you, the way that you communicate with your lady and with your daughters has to change. Because what happens is that everyone's looking for you to dictate how this is going. So if you don't communicate with your daughters and say, listen, I'm dating this person, this is who I am, it might last, it might not, then of course they're gonna be like, well, I don't know who this chick is. And then they're also picking that energy up from mom a little bit. Because as much as you say, yes, I'm here, I'm gonna be respectful, Mom, there is still a strong influence on how your daughters look at you and see how they react.
I agree, I agree.
And that's why I asked you, are you happy for him being in this relationship? Then I'm gonna say to you, Dad, you gotta make sure that you're communicating them, this is who I'm with. But then this third party, this third party, the minute she ever shows disrespect, you gotta shut it down. Because what's gonna happen is you're gonna end up losing the respect, not only of your daughters, but of a woman you're potentially growing with. And I don't want you to lose that because I do believe you deserve your happiness. What I appreciate is how y'all communicated right here. I mean, everybody came and was able to hear each other and was able to listen. That what this is, is that this is this, y'all already, I can see as a family, y'all have the safe space for that to happen. You just gotta practice it more. I mean, y'all, even though y'all had 20 years that turned out not to be the best, y'all are doing a pretty good job. For y'all to be sitting in my audience together as a family, for the daughters to be here, to respect both of y'all enough. I give y'all y'all respect. Seriously, I gotta give y'all respect. I respect on that because some families couldn't even do this. Dad, you gotta take a lead in one way and mom, you gotta take the lead in the other way. So next time another woman, if this woman comes, this woman has to be checked by you, dad. So there's nothing that these three can do. This woman has to be told by you, there can be no disrespect. These are teen girls. Yes, they're gonna have to learn and you're gonna have to be clear with them. Don't be disrespectful. Mom's gotta be clear as well because I can show mom has taught them like if somebody step to you, you step back. I got it. So that's what mom's taught them. But in this moment right now, mom, you're gonna have to say, listen, listen, listen, you gotta cut the mouth on this. If this is dad respects, we gotta respect it. But she also has to lead that way and that's gonna come from you, dad. All right? But going forward, if this woman doesn't last, whoever you get with, you gotta involve your daughters from the beginning and say, listen, this is who I'm talking to. These are grown women with smart minds. All right? And if you want them to feel like they're respected and they have a place in your life, you gotta include them. And not wait till the end, all right? And then vice versa for you, mom, you gotta let them know we happy no matter what. So even if the woman come in and we don't really like her, it don't matter, we happy for dad. And that's how the communication has to change, all right? I wish y'all the best of luck. All right everyone, thank you for being with us. Make sure to come back next time, friends, so we can keep talking and we can keep growing. I love you all.
