Separated At Birth From My Mother?! | KARAMO

I was adopted when I was 3 years old, and I knew that I had come through the foster care system. I didn't have any information about my biological family. I didn't know if I had any family out there at all. I think my adoptive mom planned to tell me more when I got older. She always said that I could ask when I was ready, but she passed away when I was 17 years old, and I never got the chance. I was adopted into a very large family. I had aunts, uncles, cousins and a loving mother. So growing up, I felt like I had a complete family. My adoption wasn't something that I thought about much. I didn't start questioning things until I was about 10 years old. I wondered if I had any blood relatives out there, so I called the hospital where I was born. I hit a dead end, and after that, I just kind of stopped searching. About 2 years ago, I got a message from someone on Facebook claiming to be a cousin, but I thought it was a prank. About, uh, 2 months ago, I got a call from a woman named Shaira. And she claimed to be my sister. And I thought someone was messing with me, but did a little bit of talking. We knew a lot of the same people, and she knew some aspects of my life that I didn't even know about. And I realized maybe this could be real. So I met her, and it was an instant bond. It definitely feels like a blood connection. I can't put it into words, but I just feel as though we are siblings. I've always wanted to have a brother and a sister for my whole life, and now it turns out that I might. I'm hoping that the DNA test confirms my hopes and that this is all real and I actually have blood family.

Well, listen, Quinton's potential sister, Shyra, is here. So everyone please welcome Shyra to the show. Thank you for being here. So you found Quinton on Facebook?

Yeah, my cousin did.

Your cousin did? Okay then. And how long have you been searching?

Since I was about 13, 14 years old.

13 or 14 years old, okay then. And how old were you when your mom pointed out your brother's father?

Oh, about 11. Mm-hmm. We happened to be walking down the street and ran into him and she just let me know that I have a brother that's 3 years older than me and that was it at the time.

Wow.

So your mom always kept a baby picture of Quintin? Is that what my producers told me?

Yeah, she had a few and she let me keep one.

Oh wow.

So you had a few. Why did you decide to start searching then?

I need my brother. I've been looking for a long time. I always been treated like the oldest and I am a middle child.

Yeah, got it. So you're like, you ready to give up the reins, let's find this older brother.

And I want everybody to know that I have a big brother 'cause a lot of people didn't believe me.

Got it, oh. So even though your mother said this to you, people still have doubted you.

Yeah.

So how did you finally connect with Quinton? It was through that cousin from Facebook?

Yes.

Okay, what happened?

She gave me his number. It took me a while, but I finally called him and we had lunch a few times and watched a couple football games. Even went and had lunch for his birthday.

Oh, nice, nice.

Took him to meet my mom.

Oh, wow. Okay then. So how long ago was this?

We started in October.

Oh, so this is very recent.

Mm-hmm.

Wow, okay then. So what did you think when you first saw him?

He looks just like my mother.

Was your mother and brother reluctant to meet him at first?

Yeah, kind of. I think she was more nervous than anything.

Got it, okay.

So, 'cause I found a picture before on Facebook and showed it to her. I thought it was Quentin, but the guy had the exact same name, everything, but the guy kept telling us that it wasn't him. Oh, okay.

So after that, she just was like, "I don't have to wait for DNA." So you only tried searching for your family once, you said, when you were 10 years old.

Twice, once when I was about between 10 and 12, I called the hospital where I was born and same thing when I was 14. They told me that I was a minor and they couldn't give me the information. I thought it was just a runaround and when I was a teenager, I was kind of hardheaded. I tried, but they just wouldn't tell me anything.

Yeah, got it. Okay then. And what stopped you from asking your adopted mom more questions?

Well, I did and she made it clear that I could ask any questions that I wanted to, but as I was growing up, I didn't fully understand it. And as I saw it, I already had a family that love me, and I think it's cool if I have two.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Got it. I heard you mention in your tape, you said you had a good upbringing and a loving family. Tell me about your childhood.

Well, I grew up in a small suburban town. I liked to read a lot. My mom got me into church, got me into Scouts, got me into soccer, tennis, tried to keep me stable and keep me out of trouble. Yeah. I had family all around. We all lived on the same street, a lot of cousins and aunts and uncles. So I couldn't get away with a darn thing. Still can't, 49, still can't get away with anything.

Different side of town from what I thought he was on too.

But no, it basically was a happy childhood. I just, I had a lot of family, a lot of friends, real close-knit community, and just tried to live the best life I can.

Did you ever question why your biological mother didn't raise you?

Not really. I figured there was a good reason. The way I see it, back in those days, We didn't have a lot of options when it came to pregnancies. And I'm just glad that if this is my mother, that she let me live. A lot of people didn't back in the '70s.

You recently met Lynette, who's potentially your biological mother, on your birthday. What was that like?

It was kind of scary at first. I wasn't sure. I was feeling, man, what if this is not real? But I took one look at her and I thought, you know what? I've seen that face before.

He looks just like her.

I've seen that face before. Every time I look in the mirror, I've seen that face before.

Got it, got it. I understand that. I hear that. But was she apprehensive?

I think so at first because we did not know, we still do not know whether or not we are actually family. Okay, got it, got it.

But, uh.

It looks like we're getting a ping and I'm being told it's from your potential mom, Lynette. Let's hear what she has to say.

This the part that I hadn't even told Quentin about. I got angry because he was constantly crying and wouldn't stop. And I smacked him and my handprint was on his face and I got scared and took him to the emergency room. And they wouldn't give him back to me. And they said because I didn't have a stable home and all that. So they took him from me and took him to a foster home. We end up having to go to court. And all I remember is telling the judge that if they didn't give him back, that I was going to come and kidnap him and take him back myself. And he said I couldn't, I would get in trouble. So I said, well, I would blow up the courthouse. That's when they told me they would lock me up and that I couldn't have any more contact with him. So I never knew how to get in touch with him. All I knew was he was in Pickerton, Ohio. And never could find you. And then I was worried about you not wanting to be found and stuff, thinking that you didn't want me to be your mother since I hadn't found you all this time. I was worried because one other time they had showed me some pictures of this other guy that had me thinking that was my son. And I knew it because I didn't feel anything. I didn't feel like he was my son. And come to find out, I was right. It wasn't my son. And so when they told me about him, I didn't want to be disappointed again.

Mm.

All right everyone, I want you to know that Lynette wasn't able to join us in person, but she did want to share her side of the story. So to hear the fact that like, it wasn't that she wanted to give you up, she was a young mother, she got scared, and then being unstable, the state took you away. How did you feel hearing that?

Wow, that's just, I never knew that. I had no idea. And, well, I don't know, just, it was kind of a surprise. But, I guess that's life. But now there's hopefully a connection. And looking to find that out.

Yeah, hearing her story, I can see how it could escalate. She's a young mother and she's made a bad choice and she's trying to rectify it and then the state steps in and instead of giving more support, it antagonizes her feelings of what to do, especially when she's saying, like they're saying, "Well, you can't see him." And then she's like, "No, give me my son, I'm gonna blow this place up," which we know is just a euphemism, but they're gonna take that serious.

Man, she was 17 years old.

She's 17 years old. And so, you know, that's one of the things that I just hate about our system is instead of understanding people's emotional state more and really looking at like what resources young mothers could need, we sometimes jump to conclusions and then the state does things like says, "Okay, I understand it's for the best interest of the child." But then without rehabilitation, without support, you know, you break families for no reason.

Right?

But I think the comforting thing, and I wanna ask you this, do you feel comforted in the fact knowing that it's not that she didn't want to?

Yes, that makes me feel really good.

Yeah. Well, there's one member of Shira's family that you haven't built a connection with, and that's her little brother Demetrius. Have you tried building a relationship with him?

Haven't been able to reach me, lives in a different state.

Okay.

And I figured I'd hold off just to make sure that everything goes the way that I want it to go. I'm praying that it goes.

Yeah, got it. Well, Demetrius is joining us remotely, and so everyone please welcome Demetrius to the show.

Look at that.

Told you y'all was great.

Look at that.

Told you.

Demetrius, what are your thoughts on the situation?

A little hesitant still.

Still hesitant?

Because everybody else, they see it. I don't see it yet.

You don't, yeah.

'Cause you need glasses.

Just like me.

And this is the first time you've ever seen each other, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, okay then. Why do you have doubts that Quinton is your biological brother?

Just because this isn't the first time that, you know, someone has been a potential fit. "I don't wanna get my family's hopes up again." You know?

Got it. What happened previously with the other potential man that she connected with?

I believe the name didn't match. I think maybe it was a different spelling, I believe. Pretty sure that's what Shara had told me.

The spelling was exactly like how mom spelled it. But I kept harassing that guy. He kept telling me he's not him.

Okay, got it. But your mother, she got her hopes up.

And I showed mom the picture.

Yeah, she was like, "That's not my son." But did she get her hopes up even though she saw it?

Yeah.

Yes, she did.

Okay then.

Do you think that Shiro should be searching for your brother?

Yeah and no. I feel like since she's the middle sibling, I think, I mean, Quentin said he did search for us, but as the older sibling, I feel like you should do a little bit more to try to find us because I mean, I was the baby.

I mean, he was searching for mom. He didn't know about us. He didn't know about us. He only knew about mom. We wasn't even born.

Okay, I thought he knew about us.

No, he didn't know about us.

Okay, well, I could be wrong, sorry. But—

That runs in the family too, I guess.

How has all this affected your family emotionally, Demetrius?

I mean, definitely my mom, it's up and down with her because it's one of those things where I don't wanna see her get her hopes up again. With this situation. And if it's not him, I understand what the consequences could be for her, you know. So we're just hopeful, man. We just kind of really want those results and we'll get the answers we're looking for, you know.

Before we get the truth, is there anything you want to say to Shyra?

Uh, basically I just, I hope this is the result she, you know, that she, she wants, you know. I hope it's him. I hope it's our brother, you know, because I feel like if it's not, it's going to be devastating to her. Um, I'm a little bit more unemotionally attached about the situation than she is, so I hope he is our brother for her, you know.

Got it. Um, is there anything that you want to say to Quentin?

I know you, my brother.

Um, Demetrius, is there anything that you want to say to Quentin?

Uh, I mean, I guess The results will tell us all, but I mean, you deserve a family. We hope it's you from what we see. You seem like a cool dude. End of the day, still a little reluctant until the results come out. That's just kind of how I operate, but—

Well, listen, you've said it best. Everyone's reluctant, but it's time for the DNA truth, so. Quinton, in this envelope— is the truth of your identity. You had a good childhood. You felt loved and supported by your adoptive family. But even at 10 through the age of 13, you had questions of who your biological family was, who your biological mother was. And as we've heard here on this stage, because of unfortunate events of her being 17, she, you were taken away. And now you have a potential sister and a potential brother who are questioning as well. Are you their family? This is your truth to open to understand who you are, not mine. There you go.

Okay. All right, here we go.

All right, here we go. What does this say?

Quinn Lynette is your biological mother.

I told you. Quentin, how are you feeling right now?

I feel like—

Here you go, love.

A lot of my life's questions have been answered.

Thank you.

Yeah.

And I'm not an emotional person.

Yeah. But it's okay because this is your identity. You know, that's one of the things why this was so important for me to have this platform for adults that are older who need to know their the truth. You have searched. How do you feel in this moment?

I'm happy. I told everybody, everybody who doubted it, they didn't want us to come here. Told y'all, told y'all, he looked just like my mom. Yeah. Just like my mom. Thank you for coming with me.

Thank you for finding me.

Demetrius, what are your feelings right now? This is your brother. Do you see the resemblance now?

Get you some glasses, bro.

Demetrius, what's your thoughts?

Look, I don't know. I'm still over here like, wow, I'm in doubt. I was in doubt and now it's official. And now all I can do is start the bond and start the—

So when are you coming here to meet him?

Soon.

Soon.

Quinton, how you feeling? How you feeling about this? That's your baby brother.

That's right. I'm now the oldest of three. Who knew?

Wow. It's gonna take a moment. The shock you're feeling, Demetrius, is natural. You know what I mean? The shock you're feeling, even though it's a sense of release and there's a closure to it, it's gonna take a moment for all of you to process this. This was none of your faults. You were kids in this. And also it's not your mom's fault. She was a kid. And I think sometimes we gotta remember that she was a child, 17 years old, trying to figure out what to do and do it the best that she could. And you know, you had a good life, which is a blessing. And I think that you all will have a better life together.

Amen.

Amen.

Amen.

But I think y'all need to get to the green room and call your mama and let her know that she can rest easy that she has definitely found her son. Thank you. Yes. How y'all feeling?

Y'all good? Yeah.

I'm excited for both of y'all. I'm excited for all of y'all. Congratulations on finding the truth, OK?

Congratulations.

Thank you. Thank you, Karamo.

Congratulations.

We got the DNA results.

Oh, OK. They going to reveal it today?

Yep. You ready for the DNA results?

Yes, I am.

All righty. You want to tell her?

You have an older son.

I knew it.

You are the mother.

You are the mother.

I knew it.

You're a twin. I told you. I knew it. Y'all kept saying y'all didn't see it. I knew it.

Yeah, but once I saw him in person, I knew it then. Yep. I saw some of those younger pictures.

Thank you for giving me a sister and a brother. I appreciate that. And thank you for life.

Oh, yes. You are so very welcome.

We have 49 years of catching up to do.

Yes, we do. I love y'all so much.

Love you too, Mom.