In this episode of KARAMO, host Karamo mediates a heated conversation between Nya, the godmother of a toddler named Journey, and Maya, Journey’s mother. Nya recounts how she re‑entered Maya’s life during Maya’s pregnancy and was informally named godmother without a clear discussion. Over time, Nya began taking an active role in Journey’s upbringing, including arranging a photo shoot without Maya’s involvement while Maya was experiencing homelessness. Maya confronts Nya, accusing her of overstepping by dictating parenting decisions, choosing romantic partners, and trying to control her child’s life. Nya defends her involvement, citing a long‑standing bond and a desire for clarity on boundaries. Karamo acknowledges both perspectives, emphasizes the need to shift Nya’s role from quasi‑parental figure to supportive friend, and encourages empathetic listening. The dialogue ends with Maya affirming that she still needs Nya’s friendship, while Karamo wraps up with a call for continued growth and understanding among the participants.
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So, Nia, tell me what's going on.
Okay, so I'm Journey's godmom. I met Maya when we was in like middle school. Me and Maya fell out when she was like 2 months pregnant. She was 2 months pregnant with Journey. We became back cool because one day my friend came over, she was a mutual friend of me and Maya, came over, she did my hair and she had Journey with her. I ended up seeing Maya in a beauty store and we started talking. So this is how I came back in her life and this is how I came back into Journey's life.
How did you become the godmother?
Honestly, one day, and I told Maya this, one day I just woke up to being told that I was Journey's godmom.
Okay.
I don't even remember her asking. I don't remember. If she did, I truly don't remember it.
Yeah.
And ever since then, I just been there.
Got it. Okay then. And how have you stepped up for Maya?
For Maya herself or just for Journey?
For Mya?
For Mya herself, I can honestly say like—
That mean you ain't stepped up. I got it, girl, I got it. How has Mya tried to push you out?
I feel like once she got with her boyfriend that she's with now, everything like started to change. I didn't really know too much about him at first 'cause when he came into Journey Life, to me it seemed like everything was just going too fast. Like he just, I didn't even know where he came from. I'm gonna be honest, I didn't know where he came from because I've been in Journey Life for so long that I didn't even know nothing about him at first. I didn't find out about him until Journey turned 1 year old. And I didn't really think nothing of it because I'm like, you know, that ain't really my business. But when everything started to clash, like when it was time to plan stuff with her, when it was time to do stuff with her, it was like, it was clashing.
You said with Journey?
Yes, it started clashing because it was like, dang, now we gotta consider his feelings. But in my mind I'm like, where did he even come from? So it was like, okay, I don't mind considering someone else's feelings, but how it came out to me, it was kind of like, where did he come from? Because for a while it was me and you. It was me, you, and Journey. So it was like, to me, it just seemed like he came outta nowhere.
But why confront Maya now?
'Cause I do want a solution. I feel like we both are trying to move forward in certain things. Ain't no need to keep going back. Ain't no need to keep arguing about the same thing. I feel like if we gonna do it and if we are gonna be with Journey, then we're just gonna be with Journey and we're gonna move forward and we're gonna try to work on things to get past it, so.
I respect that. Well, everyone, I think it's time to hear what Maya has to say about all this. So everyone, please welcome Maya to the show. Both of y'all are so pretty and so cute.
Thank you. I love.
So Maya, welcome to the show. What do you have to say about what Nya said?
Well, first I would like to give you these pictures, Karamo.
Okay. Okay, who are these photos of?
These are pictures of my daughter and Nya.
Okay. They're all adorable. I mean, they're beautiful. They're beautiful. It look like it's your daughter for real. Why are you not in the photos?
And that's my biggest thing. That's the concerns that I want to express. I wasn't in the photos because the photo shoot was planned outside and around of me. The photo shoot was planned by her for only them.
Got it.
And during this time I was going through a hardship. I was actually homeless. I didn't, you know, have anywhere to stay. So I wasn't financially stable to participate. So that is basically why I'm not in the photo shoot. And in regards to the photo shoot, we actually like had an altercation.
Maya, how has Nya overstepped boundaries?
I feel like Nya has overstepped her boundaries by basically disregarding how I feel in regards to my child. I feel like she overstepped her boundaries by telling me what's best for my daughter and trying to be in control of how my daughter life go. Like, you can't dictate how my daughter life needs to be, or you can't dictate who I fall in love with and who I feel like is a good father figure or a good parent figure for my life. Like, you were only meant to be that godmother figure. So the moment you come in dictating what I do and how I control my life in regards to my child, that's when the boundaries are overstepped.
Got it, makes sense to me. So you don't think you're overstepping your position?
I'm gonna say I just wanted better understanding of what overstepping boundaries mean because I'm gonna be honest, like I said, for the longest it was me and her. And like I said, I'm not denying the fact that it is someone else 'cause eventually it was gonna end up being someone else. I was just saying for me, like it came at a fast pace. Like we talked about things when it came down to Journey as far as disciplining her, you know, helping raise her and you know, and things in that nature. I could just say like for instance, and see if you could follow me. We had a little—
I'm gonna try to follow.
We had like a little occupation recently. Journey got in trouble at school.
Yeah.
And we are in agreement of disciplining her. So I asked Maya, I said, okay, when she got in trouble at school, what are the actions that you are taking? And then she was like informing that her boyfriend at the time, 'cause she didn't tell me about her sister, wanted to go to the park. And in my eyes, I'm like, okay, hold on.
The park?
And she done got in trouble at school? It didn't sit right with me. So I was like, okay.
But you know you just the godmama, right?
Yeah.
You know you ain't the mama, right?
Yeah. You do know that, right?
You gotta shift the boundary right now. 'Cause I'm listening to all this and I'm just like, it's been about Journey, Journey, Journey. And I'm like, I would've swore this was your child the way you was out here talking about this. Where I'm looking at these photos right now and I really do believe that you have a great heart and I believe that you probably were there for your friend in a dark moment and I wanna acknowledge you for that and tell you how much I appreciate you.
And I'm like, oh, you know, I would also like to acknowledge that. I would also like to acknowledge that because, and that would hurt me, you know, because we raised this child together. So I don't want you feeling like it's a man or anybody can step in, you know, our life and take that place. But it's at this time now, boy, you gotta let me live, you gotta let me be, you gotta let me make my mistakes, you gotta back back, you can't keep trying to protect my baby, 'cause that's my job. I understand that you love her, but hear me when I say too, I love her. I love her, so I'm gonna always make sure that, you know, what's done for her is out of good intention. And it's like, you know, even down to me trying to express myself and say certain things and tell her how I feel, even going through those periods. Of not having it and being homeless and stuff like that. I'm too old, you know, like, I'm not a child no more. It's not the sense and the nature of the matter of me pushing you away, me don't wanna be bothered with you, man. I'm trying to get out of poverty. I ain't never really had nothing. I'm trying to live for me. I'm trying to make a better life for my baby. This don't got nothing to do with you, no man, or nobody. So don't try to come at me and try to make it seem like I'm trying to degrade you or take away the fact that you've been a good godmother, but I'm just trying to express myself. And every time I try to express myself, I feel like it's the narcissistic behaviors just making me feel like I'm crazy or making me feel like it's a competition or I'm mad because I'm not getting this respect.
I don't think it's that far. I think what it is is that in this moment, you just were in a position before where you had to support. And I think now it's It's just about transitioning to something new. Do you feel like you're not needed anymore?
Yeah.
I understand.
We will always, forever and always need you.
Yeah.
Don't feel like that.
Can I ask something? Because I asked you earlier, how have you stepped up for Maya? Did you know she was homeless?
Yes, I did know. I'm not gonna lie.
I will tell you this. I would think from, From what I'm hearing about this is that I love that you wanna be an active godmother. I love that. I love that you wanna be there, but I think it's gone a little bit too far. You gotta realize you just a friend really at the end of the day. And what she does with her family, her child is her business. And I think where your energy should be shifted to is you be more of a friend to her. I think this needs to be more about y'all's friendship. This is where now you all are going to grow into a next level as friends. As friends, as women. And this is where you have to be the most empathetic and listen empathetically to each other so that you can hear each other. You know what I mean? You feel me? I can see, so what I know about body language and I can see you're at a place now where you've shut down because something has hurt you. So I've given you my advice. I'm glad that you also understand where you are at and I wish you both the best of luck. I'm glad you got to be seen and be heard And I just wish you the best of luck as you are getting to this place of growing and transitioning to something new. You hear me? All right, listen, good luck to y'all. All right everyone, thank you for being with us. Make sure to come back next time, friends, so we can keep talking and growing. I love you all.
