Should Paternity Tests Be MANDATORY? Karamo & Stephanie Debate! | Co-Parenting Unlocked: Ep 10

All right, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Co-Parenting Unlocked with one of the loves of my life, and I know my children's love of their life, their mother, Stephanie Brooks. What's up?

Hi.

Listen, everyone. This week, we're talking about DNA drama and a lot of those stories that come on my show about solving the DNA truth and helping my guests feel whole again. Listen, these stories always get me. So one of the things people don't know is that I don't ever know what the answer is going to be.

Wow.

For real?

I don't want to know.

You'll be just as surprised as we are?

Because this is my thing. This is not my truth to open. In this envelope is the DNA truth you've waited 33 years for. This is not my truth to open. This is yours. So here we go. That's why I say, everyone, this is not my truth to open. This is your truth to open. So I don't want to know what's on there. And I like to be gagged with everybody else.

Yeah.

Like, I want a little gag and a surprise.

Yeah.

For real, like, woo!

Yeah. If I already know it, my face going to read it. All right, look at this hilarious clip, y'all. This mother and this potential father, and the baby is giving a stink. Thank I. So what happened when you saw your baby in the hospital?

He looked nothing like Charlie. I was just shocked. I was kind of stuck laying there on the little thing where they cut me open. I had a C-section. I had a C-section. And that's how he looked at Charlie.

He looking at me like, [MASKED]. He looking at me like, you ain't my daddy.

So yeah. He looking at me like, bro, you ain't my daddy. You're not. And he gave me the side eye, 'cause like, what?

He like, go ahead and put me down. You ain't my daddy.

So when I saw him, I was just stuck like—

I mean, and I see you— Hold on, he might not have been giving you the side eye, he could have been giving his mama the side eye at that time.

No, no, that was Charlie helping him.

He could have been giving his mama the side eye.

Charlie was holding him, Charlie was holding him.

But I was holding him at the time.

So yeah, so then immediately when they were rolling me out after they stapled me or whatever from my C-section, I'm texting my mom, I'm like, he's really little, he does not look like Charlie, he looks more like Boyd.

But she texted her mom, she didn't tell me this.

So I'm sending pictures and I'm like, he looks like you.

She sending pictures and everything to everybody, but she ain't tell me nothing.

I told you the first chance I got.

You didn't tell me until about an hour later, like, uh-huh.

I got to wait till I go through recovery. But you told your mom as soon as you got out the hospital. Because I had my—

The medicine ain't even kicked off yet, you telling your mama.

It doesn't matter.

You still ain't— I seen you sending pictures while you was in the bed to everybody.

I just wanted to get their input on how they felt.

Why you didn't get my input? The my, my, me, my input?

She was nervous.

That baby there, that's Stank Eye. I mean— Hold on, girl. Who my daddy is?

Hold on.

She's just looking like— Who my daddy is? I don't know who this is. I need answers right now. I swear, sometimes these babies come out and they look like they've been here before.

I promise. That baby looks like a grown-up with some wisdom.

Grown-up that came back and said, I'm back. With some wisdom. I'm back in with this stupid stuff. And we on national TV. I just got here again. OK. Who we got?

Who we got? Who we got? OK. So people get on my nerves when the baby is born and they're like, he don't look like you. This baby was just born.

Born. It doesn't have—

In this small space for 9— we don't know who he looks like. Stop it with who he looks like.

Yeah, with this thing right off the bat. That's annoying. I mean, you have sometimes when the baby come out and they have specific features.

Yes.

But that's very rare.

Rare.

Yeah.

It takes, it takes some, a couple of days, some, some weeks, sometimes months for the baby's features to develop. And then people forget that.

They be jumping the gun. And I think if you are not sure, you definitely gave yourself away.

Exactly. If you not sure, gave it away. Like, I'm not sure.

And then get to calling everybody who don't look like him. Stop it.

Right. I can't remember. I think that was his child. I think that was his child. It was, it was his child. Yeah. I believe it was his child. I mean, we can't say nothing about our child because our child looks like us. He does. He does.

But you remember when Jason was born? Now, here go a funny story. I just said, don't be judging how he look and all that. It was Karamo's fingers and his toes. I know that sounds so crazy. I was like, uh-uh. And then that baby was so hairy.

Oh, yeah. And that baby was so hairy. Yes. Hairy.

That baby, yes.

We all have very distinctive hands and toes in my family. There's one toe that is longer than all the rest of them.

Yeah.

So it's very clear if a child's mine and they got that toe.

He got them toes.

He got them hands.

That same toe. Take the shoes off.

Same toe on the feet. No, we're not about to do that, OK? So one of the things that people always say in the comments is they think that DNA tests should be mandatory when a child is born. And I have very strong feelings on that.

You do?

What do you feel?

I have very strong feelings as well.

I think they should be.

Me too. That is how I exactly feel. 100%. Like, what? That would alleviate so much.

I also think that the same way you need a driver's license to drive, I think you need a license to have kids.

Yes.

But hear me out. Hear me out. Hear me out. Hear me out. This is just me.

Hear it.

If you are having classes that children start taking about understanding their emotional, mental, and physical health throughout school so that by the time they get into school, they have these classes, it will give them the license to then decide if they want to have children.

Wow.

Same way you would not put a 15-year-old in a car Same way I think that you should prep them just for the rest of their lives. We think that just because anyone can do it, that like anyone— I mean, because what we see clearly, I have a show because most people don't know how to.

Hello, right? Just because you can don't mean you should.

We see how many people have train wreck, car wrecks of relationships with their parents, right? It is bad. They are end up hurt in pain, suffering.

Yeah, yeah, right? Yeah.

The same thing happened with car accidents. Oh, and they put all of these things, all these measures. Oh, so it's so funny that in this car we've decided that we want to protect people. And this also— let's think about kids.

Wow.

In a car, we decided that, you know what, a child can't sit a certain way, they have to be in a certain car seat, they have to do all these things. But with children, we're just like, oh, I don't know, figure it out.

Wow.

I just think we should put the same rules.

I like this.

We're not saying that you can't. We're going to tell you how many to have. You have as many as you want.

Right.

But just know that you need a license. Yeah. And also, just like every couple of years, you got to go in there. Yes.

Got to be—

I love it.

I love it.

I think that as someone who worked in social services for years, I see what happens when a child is born and no one wants them. Right. I saw what happened when a child is born and no one's there to protect them.

Right.

And so for me, I'm like, if we're going to have some DNA mysteries, we also need to make sure we solving what's going on.

All right?

I love it when you call out the dads that have, like, 20 kids, and like, they all be his kids.

Like, I don't understand how I can ask this question to you because most of the dudes— can we do a little clip show of this?

They said this man has 15 kids.

You got the audacity to question mine?

So I've been a father to all 12 of my kids, no questions.

17 daughters and 10 sons, and I have 12 grandchildren from the age of 29 to 1 years old. Most of these dudes, every time when they got 20 kids, how do they get y'all to fall?

They got, they got that one. They got the going on.

But I don't be understanding how they be getting 20 kids.

Because let me tell you, those men have mastered the one thing that they are great at.

The manipulation.

The what? Of that back.

Yes, sir. Manipulation of that back.

I'm sorry.

Yes. Oh, we just got a ping, which is a fan question. Alexis in Tampa wants to know, I met my ex when I was a freshman in college, and he was a few years older. We were engaged, and I had our child, but I left when he started to put his hands on me. I don't bother this man when my son is with him. We don't speak on the phone or in person. We just communicate about our son through text. He's always on my case about having a boyfriend, which I don't. He says I leave our son with random people, which I don't. Now he says he wants a DNA test but refuses to come on your show. How can I find him a girlfriend so he'll leave me alone? All right, listen. First, forget about the boyfriend and the girlfriend. Let's take a moment here. Because when you start saying, I want a DNA test, what happens for that child is that child then starts to feel like you're rejecting them. So be aware of that because the child starts to say, well, hold on, you've been around. I thought I was yours, but now you're saying that maybe I'm not. That will cause so many different issues of abandonment. It will start to make them feel— it will harm their self-esteem, their self-worth. It causes so many issues to their emotional well-being when you start to say later on, Now, I do believe that if he's saying it, you need to get it done to prove it, to cut it down. And then once it is proven, you need to start with some clear boundaries immediately.

Yes, come on.

Clear boundaries.

I know you was there. Come on.

Don't ask me about this. Don't do this.

Yes, period.

And if you can't do this, then just know there's going to be these ramifications.

Yeah, he being too damn nosy. It's not his business whoever she's dating and seeing unless that person has taken on some of his old traits of putting hands on somebody. Other than that, the attention does not need to be on who is dating and all of that kind of thing. Take that out of the whole equation. It's not— it's a non-factor.

Girl, I don't know why.

Boundaries are with them.

I don't know what's up with these guys like that. It's part of control.

It's control.

Manipulation and control. It's part of control.

He wants to control the situation. He wants to be in control. And unfortunately, it's coming out in this— it's very insecure way.

Yeah.

And like, a real man is not going to be concerned about who you got over there unless that other man is around your child. And then he wants to know, like, what type of man this is.

Right.

But like, all this other stuff about you got a boy boyfriend, all this stuff. That's your insecurities, and you trying to control this woman, and you're just mad because you can't control anyone, right?

And I ain't even trying to— you know, I'm not judging anybody's past because I believe change is possible. You put in the work, you put in the time, you really address yourself. Okay, so maybe he's not physically abusive, but his abusive ways are still coming out because you think you're trying to run and tell them what I'm doing over here. Mind your business.

Get out of here, sir.

Your child. Your child.

Your child. Sarah, your child.

Well, that's it. Always, that's the focus.

Thank you. All right, so we're going to watch another clip with this— it's a pretty dramatic story where this man is questioning his woman's loyalty and now is also questioning if he's the father of her children.

Uh-oh.

I really have doubts about these kids.

Yeah.

No.

So what do you mean she says that she's been with such and such?

Well, she'll say— like, we'll be arguing, then she'll say, that's why I've been sleeping with my ex.

Oh.

Have you said that before?

Yeah, I have.

Okay.

But it's like I said, I do stuff too, like outta spite to make him mad. You know what I'm saying?

Uh-huh.

But it's so detailed, like why is it so detailed? The stuff she say is—

Bruh, come on. I done caught you over and over and over again. Quit acting innocent, bruh.

What about you?

So you're saying, have you physically cheated?

No, I never physically cheated on her. I love this girl. With all my heart, but it's so much trying to be happy with her. It's a lot.

Yeah, how you think I feel though? How you think I feel? I had these kids. I gotta do everything. I gotta go to my mom and daddy constantly, and my man not helping me, but I'm still with you. It makes me look stupid.

I'm not the kind of guy that's just finna deny some kids because I don't know the fact if they are mine or not. I know it's a possibility they are mine, you know what I'm saying?

I don't even agree with what he's saying 'cause he already disowned the kids, so what you mean? Make it make sense.

Okay, so.

You already disowned the kid.

This is your brother. Yeah. Timothy? Mm-hmm.

I do more for him than he do. I'm more like the father to my niece and nephew. Yeah.

Is that true? Yeah. Yeah. How do you feel that her brother has to do so much?

Man, this, it is what it is, man. Like, I try my best. It is what it is. I can only do so much.

You a 30-year-old man. You somebody did what it is. When it's time to step up and be a man to your kids, they look just like you, right?

They look just like you.

You know I got a daughter myself. I take full responsibility of her. You feel me? So come on now. It's time to step up and be a man.

Listen, I'm going to say this. I feel for this brother on this. Because you play around and tell me that you slept with somebody else and that they ain't mine, yeah, I'm going to have doubts.

Going with that.

It came out of your mouth.

Going with that.

I don't care if you're talking about it's spite, it's jokes, but—

Yeah, no, never that.

That should never be the joke. This child being mine biologically should never be a joke. Once that becomes a joke to you, it's a joke to me. So don't be asking why I'm not around.

OK.

There's consequences to our words. And there's consequences to our actions. Yes, he needs to step up. He needs to do whatever. But I also fully understand why.

Yeah.

I do, too.

I won't blame him for not being fully involved. Like, I still feel like, OK, until you know for sure that it's not—

Of course.

No, no, no. Of course.

But it is an absolute deal breaker. It almost makes me feel like we should not even be together. If we get into an argument and your toxic trait is that you tell me my kids are not my kids and you've been cheating with somebody else, go ahead and be with them.

Go and be with them. Take the kids and go be with them.

I'm not happy.

I'm not happy.

And we're not going to do anything good together for our children with that. Yeah, you do that. I just think that that is like the cardinal sin of a woman to— I don't care what state of emotion that you're in, that you will tell a man that he's not the father to some kids he's been parenting and raising with you. Then, girl, you kind of get what you get at that point. Like, yeah, now it's on you.

Amen. All right, so I want to know, how do y'all feel about DNA mysteries, about the DNA truth? Do you need help with the DNA mystery? Because, you know, I'm always here to help you solve that. All you got to do is click that link and be a guest on my show. Also, I want to know how y'all feel about my point of view that people should have to get licensed to have kids. Just tell me your thoughts.

Next time on Co-Parenting Unlocked.

Because her exact words were she feels embarrassed that he's gay.

In my opinion, that is not for her to feel embarrassed about. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Be embarrassed that he's not a good father. Be embarrassed that he's not present. Be embarrassed that he doesn't hear you.