Uh Oh! We Are A Throuple In Trouble! 💃💃💃| KARAMO

Jenna, please tell me about your relationship with Keith.

Well, it's pretty complicated. We were together for a year and a half before she decided to open our relationship to a third person.

Specific words, you said she decided.

Yes, she did.

So it wasn't your decision?

It wasn't. My love for her made me willing to try anything. I had noticed secret conversations between them.

Yeah?

It made me wanna go through her phone and I found out that she—

Oh, you pulled one of my stunts.

Yeah.

Okay.

I couldn't help myself.

Okay.

So they were actually discussing having a baby.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

So it got deep quick. Yeah. Okay, let me back it up. How were things in the beginning?

We were great. I actually left an abusive relationship before her, so she helped me find a lot of support self-love and growth.

When did you two move in together?

Immediately. We were living together like within 3 weeks to a month.

I'm not gonna say nothing about stereotypes of my sisters in my community, but I've heard this story before. Yeah. Moving very quickly. I've heard this before. So you're also raising your kids together, right?

Yes.

Okay, how many do you have and how old are they?

Isabella is my oldest. And then my son, Keilani.

That's a beautiful family.

And Keilani is 4.

And Key said you'd always be number 1. What did that mean?

That's the thing is I always wanted reassurance, but I never felt secure that I, I just wanted security that I would be her wife one day.

Yeah.

And that was an argument that we had many times since bringing Kayla in.

Got it. How do you feel about Kayla being the other girlfriend?

I like her and I enjoy her presence. It was something really hard for me to get used to, but they put way too much focus on building their connection instead of trying to get me comfortable with everything and building mine and Kayla's connection actually.

What are the things that they do behind your back?

She used to leave me with the kids and they would get to go on date nights and—

Why didn't they include you and invite you?

I guess because of the kids, but there was never an option to just find a babysitter. It was kind of just, oh, I'm leaving, I'm doing this.

Okay, I gotta be real with you because I've never been in a polyamorous relationship, but I do know what it's like for the person you love to start to have an emotional connection with someone else. Did that break your heart?

It absolutely did.

Tell me about that moment because I just, 'cause you know, it's easy to look at like, oh, this is a throuple, so like this is crazy. But like at the end of the day, your emotions are caught up. You have a family together.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. I wanna say it was around my birthday last year, February, that I found out they were telling each other they loved each other. And me and Kayla never got to that point. To that level, so I was really hurt that they were progressing without me.

Did you break up with her for a little bit?

I didn't break up with her until after the baby thing.

Uh-huh. So when you found out that they were secretly talking about having a baby.

Yeah, that was the last straw for me.

Did you ever confront them?

I confronted Key. She just said like one day, like after us, or that was when I really realized how serious serious in how they were falling in love with each other.

So Key also, which my producer just told me, proposed to Kayla in December.

She did.

While you were broken up.

Mm-hmm.

How did you find out and how did you feel?

So I went and looked online and saw Kayla saying that she was officially a fiancée and nobody really knows, but that really did break me. Depressed for a couple days at least.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Are you and Key and Kayla back together right now?

Not officially. I'm trying to work through emotions and I feel like us all coming up front with our feelings is necessary completely to move forward.

What do you need from them to have this relationship work?

We all need an agreement of what we all want. Together.

Okay, let's hear their side of the story. So everyone, please welcome Key and Kayla to the show. Hey, how are y'all doing? Please take a seat for me. Um, so Key, I'm gonna start with you. Yes. Why did you want another girlfriend?

She was lacking in some areas, but not enough to where like I wanted to leave her.

What are the areas that you felt like she was lacking?

Probably like sexually. Like I was her first girlfriend, you know? So like I felt like, you know, she didn't really, you know, wanna give me, you know, any pleasure in that way. So like it was kind of hard. It was like one-sided.

Have you ever heard this? Did you know this?

I did.

Key, was another girlfriend just an excuse to cheat?

I'm not a cheater. I don't like to cheat, you know? So I like to be honest.

I like how Kayla, when I asked that question, started smiling.

Right.

I like to be honest. So, you know, I was like, you know, maybe we should open the relationship 'cause maybe we could find a girl that is like not like you, you know? So, you know, I have the—

Well, did you ask her how she felt about an open relationship first? You started it?

Um, I feel like I did ask her and she wasn't really okay with it unless it was like a girl that she was with.

Did they ask?

Um, no, she brought it up like on a public forum that she wanted two girlfriends. That's how I found out.

There's a lot of women in the world, you know, and she, you know, she likes women too, so I was like, why not, you know, try?

Kayla, so you're the third in this.

Yeah.

Well, not anymore. You're kind of, I saw how y'all walked out. You're kind of the first in this now. So what was it like for you when they asked you to be in this relationship?

Well, they both approached me and it seemed like it was supposed to be a relationship. Like I got claimed right away and I didn't know that Jenna thought it was just gonna be a fling that was temporary.

So Key had told you that this was a relationship, but you were under the impression that we were just having a fling.

Yeah, Key both told me that it was a relationship. They found me together.

Okay.

Yeah.

Yeah, we were doing things with her like we would in a relationship and Jenna was like trying to, you know, like put up walls like, "Let's not fall in love." But like, I'm a lover, so like, I'm like, "How do we like do everything in a relationship with this girl and then not fall in love with her?" I feel like you pressured me to like love her so fast because you guys were in love.

So Kayla, how do you feel about your relationship now?

Well, I definitely have been hurt about it 'cause I did go in loving, wanting to love both of them and then everything like got strewn out through the summer and then like, then it was just me and Key, but then Key was like seeing Jen behind my back and lying and both of them lying, not talking to me about it. But now I'm still open to loving her because that's how I came into it.

I wanna hear what my audience has to say about this. Anybody have a comment on this? Okay. Okay, what are your thoughts on the subject?

Hi, so I'm polyamorous myself actually. I think there's a lot of love between all of you, but there's also a lot of confusion. And I think that you all started out opening up your relationship and maybe went a little bit too fast. You know, I think that you could have been communicated with better, right?

Jenna?

Yeah, Jenna.

Yeah.

And you as well coming into this relationship thought that, you know, it would be open, that the both of you would be ready.

So it sounds like if you're saying Jenna should have been communicated with more, she should have known that they were ready, it sounds like you're saying Key's at fault here.

I don't wanna place blame on everyone because polyamorous relationships are very complicated, but I think communication between the three the three of you, like knowing that in a polyamorous throuple, there's a relationship between person A and person B, person B and person C, person C and person A, and then there's a relationship between the three of you. And all of those need to be treated with respect and with communication and trust.

I appreciate your perspective. Thank you so much. I'm gonna be honest with you, polyamorous relationships are new for me. Ki, I'll ask you, do you think that each of those have been handled properly?

Yes, I felt like that was the main thing I was trying to do.

But it sounds like from Jenna's point of view, the relationship you didn't focus on was you two.

Yes, that right there.

That's what it is.

I don't agree.

I just felt like me and you took a pause while we focused on Kayla.

Okay, what's your point of view?

I got a question for Ki. So you said earlier that maybe we need to bring someone else in That's not Jenna, correct? So if you are a person that loves to love, how do you think that's making Jenna feel? Number one, that was there first.

I mean, I felt like me being honest was better than stepping out.

But do you feel like that's a part of a little bit of betrayal? Taking Kayla out for a second, if my partner communicates they want something, then great, yes. But then it's like without proper time to really figure it out, to communicate, to understand, I would feel like, Dang, like, wow. I don't know, that's just me. No?

No, I agree, and I feel like I could definitely feel the love from Jenna to Key because clearly you're doing something in order to make Key happy. You done entered a whole can of worms that you really wasn't beat for. Am I correct or nah? Correct.

I was not prepared, yeah.

Yeah, you was unprepared, rightfully so. So.

Absolutely. Thank you. Thank you. All right, let's talk about this. So Jenna, I wanna know, do you feel like you can stay in this relationship?

I love them both more than I've ever loved anyone else in my life. If we could come to an agreement all together, that's different, but I don't like being told one thing and then just imagining that she's being told something else.

Yeah.

I don't feel like I tell them anything different. I want them to both feel like they're wanted in life. Like the baby thing, she wants a child. So like, I don't feel like she should settle and not wanna, not be able to have a kid because—

But that conversation should have been all three of us and not just us two.

Do you agree with that?

I do believe that should have been, you know, but she was just so stuck up to like, no, she, I don't want her to have that with you. I don't want her to, you know, have all that, you know, side of you.

But you never gave me the security that I was your number one. You were telling me that, but you were showing, your actions were different. For showing different.

But you were pulling yourself away from me.

I was watching you guys fall in love.

Exactly.

And it was making me want to pull myself away.

Exactly. And you weren't putting yourself in a situation.

Why do I have to fight for your love?

You didn't have to fight for it. You the one that took yourself from the situation.

I don't like the way you react to me and yell at me and call me names. That's not a normal, basic thing.

Well, you don't listen to me. You are like a—

But I've seen you do the same thing to her.

Yeah, she does.

She does exactly that. So does she not listen to you? She does, right?

No, she does exactly that.

I'm not gonna chase after them because they're the one who set this in motion and then are deciding to leave. So what I'm gonna do to you ladies is just say this. That's very sweet. That's very sweet. Very sweet. I actually, it really is sweet. Because at the end of the day, I do believe that there was love. I think you were uncomfortable and it just wasn't patient enough. You didn't get the proper communication you needed. Communication just was off there. You gotta start to figure out how to move on, which you already are. They're engaged, they're in love. And so you have to start making your decisions based on the facts, not based on what could be. Because I think a lot of times in relationship we make these decisions on like, well, I think they could be, I think this could be. But the fact of the matter is they don't live with you anymore. They are engaged and they are happy. And part of them still wants to control something that they can't control anymore. And you just said you saw it as well. And also I would say to you, you're young, you're beautiful, and I'm not telling you to leave your fiancé. By any means, but I am also gonna say watch behavior. Pattern behavior doesn't switch until someone decides that they want to actually take the steps to do the work to grow and to heal themselves. And a response like walking off isn't someone who's taking the steps to grow.

No accountability.

No accountability there, yeah. So you as a young person, younger than two of them, watch yourself, just watch it. Make sure you don't find yourself in a situation where now, because now you're talking about marriage, now you're talking about kids, you're talking about a lot of stuff and it's your first relationship. Okay? Again, I'm not telling you to leave, but I'm telling you to watch it and understand that if things get to a place where you see it mimicking what you saw here, and I just heard you say, "Yeah, that's what they do with me too. That's what they do with me." So you're already picking it up.

Start to say to yourself, "Maybe I need to go." I did tell Jenna, when we first started, We like started talking again, like I do feel like bad that like I wasn't there for her during things. 'Cause she did tell me a lot of stuff that like she was going through with Key. And then I went through it and I didn't have, like I wished I had her next to me. So like I do understand why she wanted me there.

[Speaker] Got it. So you're both experiencing the same things. Yeah. Well, I'm glad that there is at least the support system that you all have for each other. And again, I'm not going to bash Key's character. That's never my intention here. I just hope that Key can grow and be a better partner for you, can be a better person to help you to have the relationship end in a positive way so that the kids can feel healthy. And I hope that they start to do the work on themselves. So I wish you all the best of luck.

Thank you.

You're welcome. Hold up, hold up. Where are you going? I know you wanna watch more Karamo, So click here to subscribe and click here to watch more so we can keep talking and growing, friends. I love you.