Unlock The Phone: Is He Cheating With My BFF? | KARAMO

All right, welcome to the show, everyone. Today we have a whole lot of drama and we are unlocking everyone's phone. My guest Alicia admits that she and her boyfriend Sheffer have had their share of struggles in the past, but after the birth of their son, she believed that things had finally turned around until a month ago. Alicia says she started noticing her boyfriend and her bestie acting like they were the ones in a relationship. And she believes they have been hooking up behind her back. And that's exactly why she wants me to unlock their phones to see if the two people she cares about the most are committing the ultimate betrayal. So please help me welcome Alicia to the show. How are you doing?

I'm good.

May I have a hug? First of all, come on sunshine, walking out here looking like a, Beautiful, all right. So thank you for being here. Tell me, what is making you suspect your boyfriend and your best friend?

Well, they have been joking around and like acting all flirty and stuff. And I noticed that like when I walk out the room and I come back, they're all giggly, kiki, and I'm like, oh, what? Like, what's so funny? I wanna know what's funny too.

I wanna laugh. Yeah, let me in on the joke.

Right. I just suspected, so I went through his phone and I seen some messages between them and I was like—

Oh, you trying to take my job. You going through phones, okay. So did you go, did you find any proof?

I just found like they're just very flirty asking if they could hang out. And then one time she said, "Was it good?" Like, was what good?

That was one of the messages?

Yes.

So when you saw that, did you confront them and what did they say?

I went up to my boyfriend first. I was like, "Uh, what is this? Why are you texting her like this?" And he's like, "It's nothing. I would never do you like that." Like, yeah. And they just both denied it.

Ooh, the layers on layers. I gotta go back a little bit. How long have you and your boyfriend been together?

4 years.

4 years. And now you're seeing this behavior. Has he ever cheated before in the past?

Yes. I walked in on him at my parents' house with another girl in my bed.

But I always have to ask this question sincerely. Why stay after that then? Why did you stay?

I don't know. I love him and—

Now you two have a 1-year-old child together, right?

Yes.

Did things change after the baby?

They did for a little bit.

Oh, that's a cute baby. Okay, now.

Thank you.

Yes.

It did for a little bit and then I was with the baby by myself for the first 6 weeks. He said we need bonding time. So he went to his parents house and it was very hard to.

Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. During the first six weeks?

Yes.

He decided to leave you.

He said that I need bonding time with my son, so he. He went to his parents house so me and our son can be together.

Did he not think that he needed bonding time with his child as well?

He said the mother and the son should have the first six weeks together.

Okay, so now I'm no doctor, but I work very closely with doctors many times. I've never heard them say that only mother and child need to bond for the first 6 weeks. I've never heard that. Where did he get that information from?

I don't know.

Has it been hard for you to be in this rocky relationship?

Yes, it has.

In what ways?

Just all the arguing and everything. It's just really sad 'cause like I wanna be happy, which he makes me happy. But there's times where I'm just really sad and just wanna leave.

What's bringing up the emotion right now? 'Cause I see it here.

'Cause I don't want him to leave me. I don't wanna leave him 'cause I really do love him.

Yeah. Let's bring Sequoia to the show.

Sequoia, really?

Hi, Sequoia.

My man. You, really?

Hi.

My man.

Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

I am your best friend.

Yes, and I love you guys.

Okay, we don't ever have problems like that. He's not my type.

Okay, just 'cause he's not your type doesn't mean—

No, it does, it does mean. No, it does not mean anything.

Yes, it does.

No.

He's not my type. I would never, never do that to you. I've never done that to anyone, let alone my best friend.

I would just wanna ask you point blank, Sequoia, have you been hooking up with her man?

No.

The answer's no.

I don't believe that.

I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell you.

So how do you feel about the fact that she's accusing you then?

It hurts me a lot. Like, her son is my godson. And I would never do that to you.

Yeah, I know you love my son, but I feel like something's going on between y'all two. There has to be something. Okay. 'Cause the way y'all act around each other, y'all are all kiki-ki-ing. And when I come around, like, what's funny? I wanna know what's funny too.

Okay, you're included in all the conversations. You can't get mad at me just because we're having a conversation and like laughing. That's my personality. I can't help it that I'm an extrovert. I can't help it. What do you want me to do about it?

Something that alarmed me earlier is that she said that during the first 6 weeks of her, the birth of your child, that you left. Why did you leave?

She was being a really bad person, being really mean at the time to everybody she was around. And me, I was trying to talk it out and stuff, but just, and she kept yelling and stuff. And so I was like, I'm just gonna leave you alone 'cause I love you too much to keep trying to argue when you don't want me around you.

Were you aware that she was suffering from postpartum?

Yes, sir.

Depression?

I tried to talk to her every day on her phone, called her, blow her phone up. I just got ignored most of the time though.

So then why did you decide to leave and not come back to be there to support her and your child?

I came back a little bit later, but—

6 weeks later?

Yes, sir.

Why do you go to your parents' house all the time?

I be traveling. They live far away and I be going back and forth 'cause I be going to school.

You're a full-time student?

Yes, sir.

Okay. Sheffra, my producer just told me actually that you're not in school right now. They're saying that you're not in school and that you actually said that you only leave because of when you fight.

Is that true? I don't leave only when I fight, nah-uh.

Okay.

Most of the time you leave.

So, but you're not in school right now? So you are—

I took a break.

So then why are you traveling?

I just go to my parents' house, clear my mind sometimes.

And so why do you think that you have the authority or the permission to be able to escape your life and your family and then say, well, you know what, you need to stay, you need to do there, but I get to go away? Who taught you that type of frame of mind?

I mean, I don't think of it like that. I ask her, I be like—

You might not think of it that way, but that's what it is. And I'm saying this really honestly because I don't wanna badger you right now. I don't wanna beat you up or anything of that nature because you're a young father. And actually, I'm gonna change my tone a bit because I want you to understand that there's a way for you to be a better partner, a better co-parent, and a better parent to your child. And one of the things that I know as a father is that you can't walk away just because things get hard. You can't drive away. You start that pattern now, and then when that child is 5 and really having issues at school, 10, 15, that's when they need you and you're gonna already have conditioned yourself to feel like I can just go. I can leave 3 hours because you know what? I'm tired. Oh, you're griping? You're on my nerves? I can leave. I don't want you to start that pattern for yourself, for your co-parenting experience, or for your child. Well, the thing is, I think it's time to unlock the phone to find the truth of this matter because I do see a lot of the toxic, I do see a lot of toxic toxic behaviors. And it is the reason that I have this segment of unlocking the phones is to make sure people understand you can get the answers. And once you have the answers, you can make clearer decisions. And so, you know, you asked to unlock both their phones, but I requested that all three of your phones be unlocked because that way it's clarity in all of us. Sequoia, why you smiling? I'm just, I'm just— Why you smiling?

I'm happy to be here.

I ain't even got to your results yet. Why you over there smiling?

Well, For one, because I know that I haven't done anything wrong.

Okay, okay.

So we don't know that yet.

Okay, yeah we do, I do.

I think that we should start with you and I want to go through your text messages, your photos, your apps to see if there's anyone you're calling, anything you're doing. We started off with your text messages 'cause I wanted to see if you were still talking to any guys or talking to anyone and there were zero texts found. We also went to your calls to see if you were calling anyone. There were zero calls found. I went through all your apps to see if there was anything that you were doing on the phone. Zero was found.

'Cause I'm loyal. I will always be loyal 'cause I love you.

I think it's important to establish that because it shows like you have been in a state right now where you are trying to handle your family. I can also tell you're still trying to handle your emotional state of being. Because I can still see there's a lot of sadness, there's a lot of pain that you're experiencing, right?

Yes.

Yeah. All right, so Sheffer, I think it's important to get to your phone next. So you know that I unlocked your phone immediately because I needed to know what is happening. All right, so Sheffer, we unlocked your phone and we went through calls, texts, apps, photos, everything on your phone. When it came to calls, what we found, which was very suspicious, is that you had called Sequoia 6 times 16 times recently. Why were you calling her 16 times?

What was I doing? I can't even remember.

I can answer that question.

Okay.

That was me calling her off Becky's phone.

That was you calling?

Yes, because my phone is currently shut off right now.

Got it, good to know. There's an explanation here. Now, but what I did find interesting is that when it came to text messages, we specifically were looking for the text messages between you two. All text messages between you two Have been deleted. Why were they deleted?

That's suspicious. That's very suspicious.

And they were deleted from the phone and the cloud because we go through both. So why were all text messages deleted?

I'll answer that. Okay, so he sometimes asks me for advice on them and her and what she's going through because she's not very open to expressing her feelings, which I get that, you know, just because you have a partner doesn't mean necessarily that you tell them everything. I understand that. So I try to give him my opinion and if he takes it, if he takes my advice, cool. If he doesn't, maybe that gives him an idea how to work out their stuff.

How do you feel about the fact that they're talking about you in their text messages and yet it's being deleted? I'm not gonna say what you're saying is a lie or the truth 'cause I don't know.

Yeah. I think it's suspicious that it's getting deleted 'cause why would you delete it? But also the advice, That's okay, but why would you delete the messages?

Why would you delete the vipes?

I don't know.

Okay, well, when it came to apps, I went through your phone and you installed Tinder on your phone on September 18th, 2022. You then deleted it, then you reinstalled it on 10/23/22, you deleted it, and then in December of 2022, which was just a couple weeks ago, you added it back to your phone again. Now I'm questioning this because we also were going through the time that you would go 3 hours away. Is that noticing that you also logged into Tinder during those times when you were gone?

So why are you on Tinder?

I use Tinder for the color apps.

The color apps? The color apps.

Not the color apps.

That makes a lot of sense.

You know, iPhones. You said like the color, I can't think of the name of it.

So you log in when you're on a break and leaving your girl and your son for a color app? Mm-mm.

It's obviously for a hookup. It's obviously for a hookup.

I tell you, I use it for the colors. I use it for the aesthetic.

You're not gonna believe that, right? Not the colors. If I'm gonna just fall for this and actually use this, I'm gonna say, then why log in?

Log in?

I mean, I don't know. You've been logged in.

You don't have to log in just to have the app for the colors.

I'm saying I log in, but yeah, but there's no worry.

For what?

Why do you log in when you're in a relationship?

For friends?

You have friends on Tinder. Tinder's a dating app.

Yeah.

Oh, you're sending her to date though.

I'm not gonna allow these women, first of all, they're smart enough, but I'm not gonna allow your lady to be manipulated by the fact that saying, I'm gonna make her believe that you download an app, use it, and then delete it just because you have friends. Because if you, every social media site that I have where I have friendships, I don't need to hide that from my partner. I don't need to download it and delete it. See, it's the behavior that is patterned and suspicious that causes issues for you. I think everyone here could fill in the blanks, right? Yes, okay, we wanna hear that. Now, Sequoia, let's get to your phone. So I unlocked your phone as well because I wanted to go through photos, calls, texts. Zero photos on your phone that could be anything suspicious between you and Sheffer. Now when it came to calls, we did see that there was 24 calls to Sheffer's phones that were made. But now hearing this, yeah, that explains because that was from you two communicating. Yeah. Correct?

Yes.

All text messages with Sheffer have been deleted from your phone as well.

Yeah.

So why was there an agreement from between you two to both delete the message off the phone?

Well, I delete it. I delete everything. It's kind of just a habit because I was in an off and on relationship with my ex. And so that's just why just everything's clean. 'Cause whenever he comes around, he's crazy. We're not even really, we're not even together. It doesn't matter. He's going through my phone. Like, you know, so I just delete everything.

Do you know your friend to always delete stuff off her phone?

Yes, he, her ex is very crazy. Like she can't have anything in her phone and, or he's gonna go bat crazy on her.

So I wanna know this, after hearing this, do you trust your friend? Do you think that she's doing something with your man?

I don't think so, but he's very suspicious about the Tinder.

Well, the thing is, I'm all about, the reason I ask you very specific questions is because I go through patterns, I track behavior. By tracking behavior, that's where the truth, that's what unlocks the truth for me. And so if you said you know your girl to delete messages because of this man and she did it before, it would explain your behavior of deleting messages. You deleting messages on the other hand, is weird to me. Because if someone's giving me advice about my girl and it shows that I'm genuinely concerned, I'm going to keep the advice so that I don't have anything to hide. So when it comes to text messages, it gets a little weird on your end. Also when you add the fact that you're on Tinder and you're trying to convince grown folk that you're only on Tinder to color block your phone, to use the color of the app to color block your phone. That doesn't make any sense to me. Do you believe that he's doing something?

I don't know 'cause it's very weird about the Tinder.

Do you believe he's messing with other people?

He might be, but I don't know.

Mm-hmm. You have a man right now that literally, I just told you directly after you asked me to unlock his phone, is on Tinder logging in and out. You have a man, yes, he's the father of your child, but he is literally leaving you and leaving your child to go 3 hours away Doing Lord knows what. Why do you wanna stay in a relationship that's not healthy?

I don't know, I guess seeing my sister raise a kid on her own, I don't wanna be a single mother.

So you have fear?

Yeah.

So fear is causing you to make you feel like you need to stay?

Yeah.

That fear is keeping you trapped. So next time someone asks you why you staying with this man, don't say it's because I love him. Say it's because I'm afraid of being alone. Call a spade a spade. You just heard your best friend say she's afraid of being alone.

You're never gonna be alone. I'm there. If I can get out of mine and be done with it, you can, honestly.

Yeah.

This is what I mean about the support. The reason I let him go is because I don't know if you're gonna have the courage yet to be able to leave him. I don't know it. And I wish that I had more time to have more sessions with you where I could really get you to that place, girl. But your best friend will be there for you. Yes. She's going to be there for you. And you have to be a rock where you can say to her, you know what? I admit maybe I shouldn't have texted. Because you shouldn't have. The minute she told you she felt insecure, texting has to stop. It has to stop. That's what I was talking about with the attention. It has to stop. But for you, that's where you have to say to her, you're only staying with him because you're afraid, girl. Let's work through that fear. That's what best friends have to do. Let's work through that fear. No more like, girl, no, you don't need to be with him. Girl, it's toxic. Girl, let's laugh it off. Girl, let's go have a good time. Y'all need to start doing some work. You're young, beautiful women who have the capacity to do work and who have the capacity to find the love you deserve. Can you hug your best friend and can y'all be there for each other? Thank you. Hold on, where you going? I'll tell you where you're going. Right here to subscribe and right here to watch more. Period.