KaramoYour Guide To Unlocking Your Best Self

Use your words and set clear boundaries. #karamoshow #shorts

9 Feb 2023 · 1 min

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A counselor tells a mother her daughter's abandonment fears are being triggered by men in her life, and suggests she test whether her daughter will help her. If not, the mother should set boundaries calmly instead of getting angry, speaking from her adult self rather than her wounded inner child.

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The only thing I can say here is I would just ask for you to just continue to understand that what your daughter needs is for you to leave your man. She needs that. She needs to know that she's not gonna be abandoned again. And the thing that triggers her to make her think she's gonna be abandoned is the men in your life. Okay. Maybe that's a first step. Maybe there's a moment where you call and say, "Mom, I need you." And you see if she's gonna choose the man or she's gonna come to you. Is that something that could be a little bit more manageable and healthier for you? And if she doesn't show up, instead of getting mad or angry, you say, "This is where I need you to show up and you couldn't. So now I have to take the steps to create more boundaries." That's the language you use. Don't get upset because every time you get hurt, you argue with her and that's just the little girl in you screaming out for more love. But the grown woman in you that I've already seen here that's strong has to continue to use her words and set more boundaries.