Why Does My Mom Treat Her Alleged Sister Like A Daughter?! | KARAMO

So why do you feel Renita is scamming your mother?

Because who is she? She just popped up outta nowhere and my mom's like literally catering to her and like she'll tell me like, oh, Renita did this for me and Renita did that for me. Like I don't care.

So when you say she popped outta nowhere, what do you mean?

Like literally outta thin air. My mom, like probably 10 years or so ago, my mom just like said, oh, this is my little sister. Literally outta nowhere. Nobody heard nothing about her. My aunties, they don't claim her. Nobody else claims her. She's just like, this is my little sister and we're the same age.

Oh, okay.

Like, and it's like—

So none of the other family members claim Renita?

No, not at all.

Just your mother?

Just my mom.

Okay then.

And it's like, she's not like that with her other siblings. So what makes Renita so special?

Yeah. And it sounds like she's, from what you're describing, and if I can assume from what you're feeling, that she treats Renita more like a daughter.

She does.

Is there some feeling in your heart? Do you feel like your mom's trying to replace you or Renita?

In my heart, I feel like my mom doesn't even care to replace me or anything. She doesn't care about me like that. She just wants to hurt me in some type of way. So like with me and Renita being close in age, that's like a way of her hurting me 'cause she knows like I'm kind of paying attention to the situation a little bit.

That makes sense. Okay. Well, the answer to this DNA mystery is important to you. Why?

Because like, I wanna know, did my mom really just turn her back on me and my kids for a complete stranger that nobody knows that claims?

Yeah.

It's not fair. Like, she, this girl, nobody deals with her because it's always drama.

Yeah.

It was drama when she came 10, 20 years ago, whatever, 10, 15 years ago. And it's drama now. Absolutely. And it's like, for this girl, who is she?

Who is she?

I feel like she's like a demon. She just came to terrorize our, the little dynamic subfamily that we have.

Got it. All right, well listen everyone, before we meet your mother, I think it's time that we meet Renita and hear her side of the story. So everyone please welcome Renita. Hey Renita.

Hi.

Thank you for being here. So how do you feel about everything that was just said?

I don't know how to feel about nothing she said.

Have you known that she's had these feelings about you for a while?

Yeah. Well, I didn't know until she came to Iowa. She's saying that I came to Iowa, but that's a different situation.

Okay.

So you came back to Iowa with Tammy?

Who, me?

When she left me in California, you went back to Iowa with her? You was there?

I've been in Iowa.

You wasn't there when I was staying there.

I left like days after because of the situation that happened.

I just realized you don't call your mother mother, you call her Tammy.

Tammy, yeah.

When did you stop calling her mom?

When we were little. They never called her mom.

You stopped calling her mom?

Yeah, because we'd be like, "Mom, mom, mom." She wouldn't say nothing and be like, "Tammy, what?" Oh, so she was sort of the one that said, "Okay." No, she was the one that just didn't answer the mom.

Didn't answer the mom, yeah, that's what I'm saying. I wanna ask you, Renita, does it hurt you that she thinks that you're a scammer? No, I don't care what she thinks.

I don't care about what she thinks.

You don't care about, okay.

How can I scam somebody I help? Like, I don't, what am I scamming? What, saying that I'm her sister because that's what I knew? That's how, what my mom told me. How am I scamming? I didn't find me, Tammy found me when I was 18. I didn't find Tammy. Tammy flew me to California. I didn't come in, you know, I didn't find her. What am I scamming and doing? I think you're just jealous of our relationship because—

That's the thing right there.

That's what they want.

We are different.

We walk on different parts of life. That's what they want.

They want me to be jealous of them.

That's the last thing I want. Maybe you want the relationship with your mom that I have with her, but I'm her sister. I'm not her daughter.

That's my whole point. You're her sister. You're not her daughter, but you're acting like that's your mother, and I'm far from jealous.

How do I act like that's my mom when I correct her, tell her not to do certain stuff?

You guys are acting like you guys are mother and child.

It don't matter. My sister's 19 years older than me. I'm 34. She's her age. I'm just going to try to— That's a big gap. Big sister. Go back, I wanna understand.

So you said Tammy came?

That's my big sister. Yeah.

She came and found you?

Oh, she did.

So you didn't even know that Tammy existed?

No, when I was younger.

What about the other people? What about the other siblings? Do you know any of the other siblings that are also liars?

Yes, I do.

Do they talk to you?

Yes, I do.

The one is dead. No, they don't, okay.

We don't talk often. The other two kids are adopted out. My dad has several kids. He works, he raises all of us.

At the end of the day, when it's all said and done, the main one's not complaining.

Do you believe your sister?

Yes, I do. But I wanna know because it's too much doubt with hers.

Tammy's delusional. We don't care what Tammy is talking about. We talking about facts.

This is for me.

Nobody, nobody claims you but Tammy.

That doesn't matter right now. It does matter because at the end of the day, I always was an ugly duckling.

That's why you sitting up there trying to take my mom. It's not about your mom.

It's about my dad. It is about my dad. You want to have a blessing from her so you can be close to her. But what about me being close to my mom? Me and Tammy are already going to be close regardless because she came and got me when nobody else could. But she needed to come get me when nobody else was there. But she tried to help you. No, she didn't. You brought a whole man there. She tried to help you. She tried to be there for you. She got you all the way from California to Iowa. She didn't come get me. I drove out there. With her medicine that you didn't bring. What do you mean? It took me a whole week to get out there.

I almost died.

How many times did we almost crash on the freeway? How many times? How many tires did I need driving to Iowa? How many times did I need to call you guys to tell you guys that I was about to slide off the freeway? Excuse my language.

Well, now I'll say this. This is a conversation we need to have when your mom comes out here. Tammy, I wanna know from you, does it bother you that your daughter and your potential sister are fighting?

No, she likes it. She likes drama.

You know what?

I gotta hear from her.

I know, just see, you know, she, this girl. The thing of it is, is this. I have tried so many times like to reach out to Naomi to try to help Naomi and Naomi doesn't want any help. She doesn't listen. Naomi, be quiet.

Just finish talking.

I can hear the commentary if you want to. She doesn't listen, and it's always a bunch of drama trying to deal with her. She's drama-filled herself.

She doesn't know how to give direction. She knows how to criticize, criticize, criticize. She doesn't teach.

She doesn't try to help.

She doesn't pass on no knowledge or nothing. All she tries to do is critique a person and tell them what they're doing wrong. My mom very rarely tells me that I'm cute. I know I'm cute every day that I get dressed. I hear it from people on the streets every day.

She never tells me that.

Let me tell you something.

If I'm cute, if I'm cute, she'll be like, you look She'll be like, are you serious?

I have to be exquisitely beautiful in order for her to tell me that I'm cute. If I'm cute on the regular, she'll be like, mm, I guess them pants are all right. Where you get those boots from?

Did you know that Naomi was homeless?

Yes. She say that, I don't believe it.

Are you serious, Tammy?

I don't believe it.

Why don't you believe it?

I'm living with an old man that I don't wanna stay with in a little bitty studio apartment with my two kids. She wouldn't even watch my babies. I had nowhere to take my babies on my baby's birthday. I don't watch kids. After my baby's birthday, I asked my mom to watch my babies 'cause I had absolutely nowhere to take 'em and she told me no. I don't watch kids. I had nowhere to take my babies. Nowhere. We were literally out on the streets and my mom told me no. But listen. She don't watch babies, why she can't be a grandma? She needs to tell the truth because the reason why people don't, I ain't gonna say people. I'm gonna say me. The reason why I don't watch Naomi's kids, Naomi has a track record and she know it. When she leave her kids with you, she will not come back to get them.

Tell me.

She will stop answering the phone and everything else.

Tell me, what do you mean?

She will not come. Naomi.

I swear to God, tell me.

Naomi, I'm lying? Yes. What are you talking about? The only kid that ever was left with you was 'cause you took her. What are you talking about? You never watched. You never watched. You never had to. You drop your kids off, do you go back and have your kids?

I'm gonna ask you this.

You never was with none of my other kids, Tammy.

I'm talking about, tell me, tell me, tell me.

She never spent no time with none of my other kids. Like I said, it's kids. She wanna tell the truth, I'm not doing it. She spent no time with none of my other kids. She tells my 3-year-old that she doesn't like her. My 3-year-old comes and asks me all the time, "Mommy, do you like me?" Based off Tabby telling her that she don't like her.

Well, there's two things at play here. What's going on first is that we have one young woman who needs to find out if this is her family, get clear information on her identity. Then we have another young woman who has been denied by her family and doesn't have support. And I don't mean by you, I mean by her mother. By her mother. Do you feel that way?

Well, I wish I would've known that because when Tammy said that Naomi was coming to Iowa, I was happy. And to be honest, I was already in Iowa when she was saying she was coming to Iowa. I was happy that we all would be together. But when we got there, it was a bunch of crack. I just wanna know where I come from. Is this my dad or not?

That's what I just said. I already saw the breakdown of communication We all need to get together. The person who is the cause of the breakdown between the communication between you.

It ain't me. I don't got nothing to do with her and her daughter relationship. She just, she just got it. Naomi's older than me.

See, Tammy doesn't believe me. Let me tell you before we do this, because this is the thing.

Like you said, your mom don't encourage you. There's a lot there.

She don't say you beautiful.

I don't believe that. She always say, this is my beautiful black baby. This is my black diamond. She doesn't say it to me. I don't know. She encourages our relationship. Y'all are not gonna fight.

Okay, this is what I want, Chris.

I don't understand why you say that.

So I'm not gonna let you say that. I need you to understand. I need you to understand this before you respond to that.

Maybe she don't know how to show you the love you want her to show. Like, you know how sometimes I just shut up and listen to my sister because she's older.

Maybe sometimes you just be quiet and just listen, even if you don't know how you feel.

This is what I want y'all to do. What I need you to understand right now is that the issues you have is not with her. And what is happening right now is that I understand that she's an easy target for all the pain you feel from the relationship you have with your mother. But I'm listening to this and I'm watching it. I'm tracking behavior. Memories and things that have happened. This woman doesn't have anything to do with the relationships you have with your mother. I know it's easy to feel that way because the space that you feel belongs to you, she's in. The love that you feel in relationship you feel like you wanted to have, she has. But that is not her doing. That is the doing of your mother. That is the doing of her sister. And I'm watching this right now, the miscommunication, the misinformation that has nothing to do with her and it has nothing to do with you. There's a person in the middle who's making choices about how they communicate with you both. And I'm not talking about Tammy in a bad way because I haven't got to hear her story. But what I do know is that you two should not be feuding. So what I want before we give you this DNA truth, I need you to recognize that this is not your enemy. If you can receive that, I know you can understand it, but you gotta start processing that in your heart. This is not your enemy. This has never been your enemy. And this could be an ally for you.

I just wanna know about my mom, the question is.

But look, it doesn't matter. You don't bring up your mom. What did I ever do to you? I'm talking about her.

It's the stuff that my mom says that makes me feel the way towards her.

I know that, but I'm giving you clarity right now.

Yeah, I know that it's Tammy, I know.

Look at her, look at those tears.

What did I ever do to you? I never did nothing to you. I only wanted a relationship with you.

Hold on, hold on.

And you know I love those girls.

No, hold on one second.

Look.

No, Tammy, gimme a second because I need them to—

No, no, no, I'm not disrespecting you.

No, no, no, Tammy, Tammy, Tammy, you're on my stage. Do not disrespect me like that. I haven't been disrespected.

I'm not disrespecting you, Karamo. This is not about her. This is about her. I think the culture— What you mean? I'm not coming back up here again.

That's fine.

Yes, that's your straight embarrassment. This is about you.

No, because you make the show about you.

You know what? I think it's ready for this DNA mystery. Are you ready for this? This is it. This is your truth. This is your truth. This is for you. You were a young woman who did not have information about her truth, about her family, about her identity. You understand? And you deserve to have that. Whether Tammy is your sister, whether it's your family or not, you deserve to know your truth. And in this envelope is your DNA truth. Are you ready for this?

Oh, not, but.

Here you go.

Timmy is my sister. She is my sister.

Which means that is your aunt. That is your aunt. Hold your aunt.

I told you that.

Hold your aunt. Hold your aunt.

I told y'all, tell everybody. I want you and I want you to come to Iowa.

I want you to come.

And we can be together. Do you hear me?

Please.

Hold your aunt. No, no, no. Stay close over there. Stay close over there. This is your aunt. This is your aunt.

This is my big niece.

This is your big niece.

We are, and we love— we so much alike that we just don't get along. I think that's what it is.

It's not even that. It's not that. It's way deeper. It's way— it's past you.

What it is is, Tammy, listen, what happened is that you feel like Tammy chose her all these years. But what I need you to understand is the same way you felt rejected, the same way she didn't understand.

Okay, so what about now?

Now she's really going to take her and I'm still going to be left out. Like, I'm still going to be left out. That's good. I know I understand it is Tammy, but she's still going to leave me out though. It is It's even worse now 'cause it is her sister. No. Oh my God.

Take a moment.

Take a moment. Now this is where big aunt, you gotta—

Please don't feel that way.

There you go, aunt. Let her know.

Please don't feel that way. Whatever place that you need me to be, I'm there.

No, listen to her.

I'm there.

If you need me, I'm there. Those girls, I'm there.

She can't be there for me like my mom.

I hear you and I hear her and I'm gonna say, okay, it's true, but at the end of the day, pick up where we at. We just have to start where we at. That's just it. We can't, we gotta start where we at because we, we gotta start where we at. And those little girls that didn't have a mom, we just gotta pick it up and be there for our kids.

I just rather just keep doing my thing.

No, I need you to understand, no. Because what you're saying to yourself right now is the hurt and pain that you received by being rejected by your mother. That's what you're feeling right now.

Can I do a DNA test on her to make sure she my mom, please? Please.

I know she said she had me when she was 15, but I feel like she stole me from somewhere 'cause this cannot be my mom.

She said she stole me.

I'm serious, she stole me. Like, I'm gonna, please give me a DNA test.

I will support you in getting another DNA test with Tammy.

Please.

And what I wanna do with that, hold on, let me tell you why, is because what I recognize through this conversation, the first thing I wrote down, and when I saw the age between you and Tammy, is that Tammy must have had some type of difficulty in her childhood. And then losing a child young as well, didn't know how to process her grief and put it on her daughter. And it disconnected your relationship. And I watched her right here. She's never healed and she's never forgiven. And because she's never healed and forgiven, it's called strain on y'all two. So she feels lost and you feel lost and abandoned. And that is separate from what happened here. I'm here with her. So if you feel like you need to have confirmation with your mom.

I do.

I invite you back so that I can get you that confirmation and then I could support you and Tammy in healing. I can support you and Tammy in healing. I can. You got your answers now and I'm so happy for you.

Thank you so much.

I'm so happy for you.

Thank you. It's real, Naomi. I'm her sister.

I'm so happy for you. Congratulations. I'm very happy for you.

For you.

All right, friends, stay with us. We'll be right back with more.

I feel very good. I mean, I knew we looked alike. I knew our voice was alike. I knew we both wear glasses. So I'm so happy the outcome is she's my biological sister.