You Cheated With Your Ex, Those Aren't My Kids! | KARAMO

Victoria been cheating on me since the day we got together. That's why I don't think these kids are mine. When we first got together, she was texting 3 guys at once. After that, I even found out she was hanging out with one of her exes. She even has her ex saved in her phone as a girl's name. Now that's shady. I even went on Instagram one time and seen her ex driving her car, and she won't even let me drive the car. There was one time She even said she was going to her homegirl house, but I actually watched her get in the car with another guy. She doing all this and I'm supposed to believe these kids are mine without a DNA? I'm not no fool.

Okay, so he's making a lot of accusations in that about the beginning of your relationship. So first, let me, let's go through. Have you ever cheated on Raven?

Well, I mean, we done both did our dirt, you know, text other people, physically, no, I haven't been with another man since I got with him.

So you text other people, but you have never been Physically involved with anyone?

Yeah, correct.

Is it true that you have your ex-boyfriend in your contacts as a girl?

Yeah.

Why? Don't say that with a smile like that.

Okay, it's, well actually, you know, when we get mad at each other, we do stuff outta spite. But me and my ex, we have nothing going on. It's like he more of a friend than anything. Like I don't look at him like that no more, so.

Okay then. So how did Raven react when you told him you were pregnant a second time?

"Are you sure it's mine?" And I'm like, "Yeah." Was he involved in the first child?

In between the first and second child?

I mean, he's there, but he's not supportive. It's like I'm taking care of my third child. He's like a third child. Supporting a grown man as well. I don't have no help but my mom and dad.

Got it. Does he work right now?

Not at the moment. He was working, but he went to work for one day and didn't go after that. And when he do work, his money does not go towards me. It go towards scratch-offs. He, not his kids, nothing, bills, I'm doing it all.

Yeah. This has to be overwhelming because you're 24 years old.

Mm-hmm. It actually has. Like, I beat myself up daily when I wake up. I don't feel like myself. I'm depressed, I'm always crying. I don't understand how I'm feeling. Like, yeah, he made me feel like I'm just this horrible person and I'm not because I've been here for 5, 6 years, you know what I'm saying? Any grown woman wouldn't deal with this.

Okay, we have text messages Raven sent you after your son was born that my producers want me to see. "I don't even want him." So, "You ugly." "I'll never again." Okay, and these are the type of messages you get?

Yeah.

Okay.

It's all authentic and it's almost everyday thing. It's toxic.

Everyday thing, okay. How do you feel about what was just said about you?

Well, I really don't agree with it because It's all about how you treat somebody, how they treat you.

And so do you feel like she treats you bad?

Yeah, I do. I really feel like she treat me like dirt.

In what way?

Like she just, like we get to arguing, she be saying she cheating with such and such, she been with such and such. Like how I'm supposed to believe these are my kids and she saying all this stuff? Like I really have doubts about these kids.

Yeah.

No.

So what do you mean she says that she's been with such and such?

Well, she'll say, like, we'll be arguing, then she'll say, "That's why I been sleeping with my ex." Oh.

Have you said that before?

Yeah, I have.

Okay.

But it's, like I said, I do stuff too, like outta spite to make him mad. You know what I'm saying?

Uh-huh.

But it's so detailed, like, to, like, why is it so detailed? The stuff she say is—

Bruh, come on, I done caught you over and over and over again. Quit acting innocent, bruh. What about you?

So you're saying, have you physically cheated?

No, I never physically cheated on her. I love this girl with all my heart, but it's so much trying to be happy with her. It's so hard.

How you think I feel though? How you think I feel? I had these kids. I gotta do everything. I gotta go to my mom and daddy constantly and my man not helping me, but I'm still with you. It makes me look stupid.

Yeah. Why aren't you able to provide support?

Well, I have no problem working. I promise I don't have no problem going to work, none of that. It's just when I do, like, maybe if I do go to work, I have to do like a little few extra hours, she callin' and textin' me, "Come home, come home." Like, I had a job, it, okay, they close at 10, so I was dishwashin'. So, you know, when you dishwash, it take like a little extra time because you gotta actually clean up the whole kitchen.

See, this is the problem right here.

She calling and texting, "Come on, come on, come on." I wouldn't even give you a ride to work.

My mama was then. So what's your excuse, man?

Well, no, no.

So do you call him when he's working and try to say come home?

Not like the way he's saying it, no. But he know my mama don't like, she's older, she doesn't like driving at night. And I didn't have a car at the time. So it's a specific time that she goes out.

So you're saying when you were calling him, it wasn't more about like, saying, "Come home, I'm lonely." It was more about like, "My mother can only give you a ride at this time." Yeah. Okay, is that true?

Well, yeah, that is true. It's true.

Okay. So if you don't think that these are your kids, why are you staying with her?

Well—

Why they had to get your last name? Why Braylon had to get your last name?

Well, it's the fact that I'm not the kind of guy that's just finna deny some kids because I don't know the fact if they are mine or not. I know it's a possibility they are mine, you know what I'm saying?

I don't even agree with what he's saying He already disowned the kids, so what you mean? Make it make sense.

Okay, so.

You already disowned the kids.

This is your brother. Yeah. Timothy? Mm-hmm. Timothy, thank you for being here. Okay, so you immediately had a reaction to him saying that I'm not the type of guy to disown kids because you feel like he's already disowned them?

He already disowned them. I do more for them than he do. I'm more like the father to my niece and nephew.

Yeah.

Is that true?

Yeah.

Yeah. How do you feel that her brother has to do so much?

It is what it is, man. Like, I try my best. I can only do so much.

You a 30-year-old man. You somebody did what it is. When it's time to step up and be a man to your kids. They look just like you, right? They look just like you. You know I got a daughter myself. I take full responsibility though, you feel me? So come on now, it's time to step up and be a man.

Do you have a relationship with your family?

Barely.

Barely. Okay, when did your relationship with your family go away?

Probably like 2 years ago.

What happened 2 years ago?

Usually me and her get to arguing and I'll just leave and go to my brother's house or something. You know what I'm saying? Let it die down. But sometimes she'll pull up over there, acting a fool with them, cussing them out and making threats and stuff.

No, no.

And like they don't even, bro, Listen, these folks do not even with me, period, because of her.

Okay, well, that's not an excuse. My family's still here for him. He tears up every car I done had. My house, he done messed it up. He done put holes in the wall. I have to pay for that. He's not gonna help me. Like, I know this. I know this, but I wanna believe that it's gonna work out.

So you, 2 years ago, Y'all have been in this dysfunctional relationship for 5 to 6 years. 2 years ago, the dysfunction finally really went to the doorstep of your family house, and your family at that point set a boundary and said, "We don't wanna deal with this." And they probably gave you an ultimatum?

Yeah, they did. They told me if I, I could come stay with them, but they didn't want her over there.

Got it. So you had to make a choice and you chose her.

Right.

And then within that time, you start to resent her?

Kinda, yeah.

Yeah. So what will change if these children aren't yours?

Well, I actually would step up and do something. Like, I need, only thing I need for her is to help me get to work. Like, that's all I be asking her, help me get to work. And just like, don't, when you say something to me, don't be so demanding. Like, talk to me like I'm a human being. Like, I'm not a child.

Do the same to me though. Do the same to me.

I do.

No, no you don't. No you don't.

Well, I—

Just in case I wouldn't even feel the way I feel.

Well.

Like, man.

Okay then, well I think it's time to get to the DNA outcome and find out if these are your children, right? We're gonna start with your oldest child first. In this envelope is the DNA truth if Joycelyn is your child or not. Are you ready for this? Yeah. It's not my truth to open, it's yours.

Man, listen, bro, I just hope everything working out for us.

Come on, open 'em up.

If one of 'em not mine.

But we just know that you not gonna step up even when you see the truth, so.

Jocelyn is your biological daughter.

What'd I say?

Yeah.

How's that make you feel? Yeah? Overwhelmed?

Yeah.

'Cause now it's real. Right. I get that. I get that.

All right.

So here goes the envelope for Braylon. Are you ready for this truth as well?

Yeah.

Here you go.

Okay.

Thank you. Brandon is your biological son. For real.

I heard you apologize to her. Why was it important for you just to do that?

Because like, I know sometimes I say stuff, but that don't mean I don't care. I just want her to know that she my everything. For real. And I love this girl right here with my whole heart and my whole soul. And I just want her to be happy. If she's not happy, I'm not happy.

Mm-hmm, yeah. I do actually believe that. I don't believe there's been infidelity in this relationship. I think that there's two young people that are trying to figure out how to communicate and grow together and never had the tools to do it. And what, while I was asking that question about what shifted, because I know what shifted in her, She became a mother and she's stressed and she's overwhelmed. And so this is not to excuse behavior, but I understand her temper, everything is short because her responsibilities now are so much greater. Because as you've seen for these years, you've had the luxury to sort of step in and step out. She has not. So of course when she talks to you, there's a frustration there of like, I already told you that. Look how much I'm dealing with. So I understand the shift that's happening in her. I couldn't understand the shift was happening in you. And what I realized is from the context that your brother gave me is that once you had to choose between your family and her, now it was like, well, now I really gotta step up, which is why I said, oh, you're feeling overwhelmed. You're feeling overwhelmed by this. And this overwhelmed, being overwhelmed is bringing out the most destructive side of you. Instead of you trying to say, let me go towards it, you've been running away from it. You've been saying, "Oh no, I'm not doing this." And every time she has her frustration, you go back into it. The first thing y'all gotta do is first of all, you have to understand now that she's frustrated and she's overwhelmed. It's time for you to start stepping up. And I know that she's been in a pattern to believe like maybe he won't, but it's your opportunity now to show her you can.

[Speaker] I can.

[Speaker:KARAMO] You can.

[Speaker] And I will.

[Speaker] First thing is a job. Do you think you're able to find a job?

[Speaker] Yeah.

[Speaker] Okay, a full-time job and keep it?

[Speaker] Yeah.

Yes, sir.

No, I don't have no problem finding no job.

Do you feel the same about that?

I mean, I feel the same, but like I said, it's a pattern of him on and off. And even when he do get his money, it doesn't go towards me or the kids.

Okay then. So are these your first children?

Yeah.

These are your first children? Yeah. Have you ever taken a parenting class?

Yeah, when I was 18.

Uh-huh. Yeah, and so that probably didn't stick with you. You ever taken a financial literacy class? No. Okay, so this is what I'm gonna do for you. I'm going to have my producers find a financial literacy class. And these are short. I know it sounds like school, it's not, all right? It's something I even been through, all right, when I was your age. Because I think it's important for you as a young man to understand that if you gotta step up in this family, you gonna have to learn how to manage your money. And sometimes managing money for us gets overwhelming. So it's easy just to spend it, to let it go out the window because we don't know how to get these things. Sometimes if your credit's bad, it's like, I don't even know where to start. I don't know how to get this. There's a lot of these things that happen. So I wanna set you up on the right path so you can start to figure that out so you can be the proper father for these kids. What I need y'all to do is I need y'all to make a commitment to each other that when you're frustrated or when you're overwhelmed, that you're not gonna start saying things to each other to trigger each other. That's where the growth needs to happen in this. Y'all can have a beautiful family, y'all can have it, but you can't keep triggering each other with those smart mouths. And both of y'all got it, okay? Can you commit to him that when you're overwhelmed, you're not gonna start calling her by name or start saying, "I'm talking to my ex." You're gonna say, "Baby, I'm overwhelmed." Okay, I can, I can say this. And when you feel overwhelmed, can you say to her, "Listen, I'm feeling overwhelmed right now. I gotta figure this out, but I'm talking to you about it." Because the more you let her in and communicate is the more she can say, "Oh, I get what my man's going through and now I'm not gonna be so quick to be snappy." Okay, gotcha. Can you admit to that?

Yes, sir, I can.

It's time for you to change and step up, okay?

Yes, sir, I will.

You got it. Y'all gonna be all right, all right? I wish y'all the best of luck, all right?