Your Dad Told Me to Get a DNA Test, Was He Right? | KARAMO

So tell me, why are you having doubts in denying your daughter? Potential daughter, I guess.

Well, the doubts I have, during the pregnancy, the first month, second month of the pregnancy, her dad had let my mom know to make sure that it was my child.

Wow.

But when I talked to my mother, she was very adamant about the situation at hand.

Hold on, but that's a lot. So her father called your mother to say, "You need to make sure this is his." Yeah. Oh yeah, I would have doubts too. Like your own father is calling and saying something?

Yeah, and that's first.

Yeah.

Throughout the relationship there was a lot of infidelity.

Yeah. Oh, she was cheating?

Yeah, people that were brought around as brothers or friends usually ended up being, you know, Somebody she was messing with.

Oh, how did you find out she was cheating?

How did I find out?

Yeah.

Oh, well, one night we were actually going to get food. We went to Taco Bell. Uh-huh. And I got a text message. Bing, you know, it pops up.

Yeah.

So I look over and it's screenshots of the guy who she was messing with's girlfriend. Then I got another screenshot of her talking to another family member about how she didn't care and, you know, she was gonna do what she wanted to do. So—

How'd that make you feel when you got that?

To be honest, man, it tore me up.

Yeah, I can imagine.

I come from a two-parent household. They were married and had the best marriage. But when they did go through things, they showed us that, you know, you don't leave.

Yeah.

You know, so—

You communicate, you talk it out. Communicate. How was your relationship with Michelle before this, you found out she was cheating?

It was pretty good. You know, when you're on that cloud, you're just floating, you're moving, you know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You just, you feel like nothing can stop you. So you hear certain things, you know, like when I first heard it, it kind of just brushed it back, you know what I mean? Like, you know, I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt because this is our circle. So anything coming outside of this circle was kind of, you know, like who's gonna believe it? So, but then when you start seeing the, you know, the patterns and the things that's going on, then it's like, it's a little easier to believe.

[Speaker:KARAMO] Did you suspect her of cheating when she told you she was pregnant?

I'm not gonna say yeah because I gave her the benefit of the doubt, no. Because you know, like, you can't go into anything believing that somebody's already something else. So I'm gonna believe what you tell me. You know what I mean?

You got a healthy point of view on life, Karamo. Good job. Thank you.

But after certain things were said and certain people came around, it started getting cloudy. So I kinda wanna know.

So I gotta ask you though, did you ever cheat on her in your relationship?

After we were— You found out. Yeah, after I found out, we were, you know, that was going on and we were just, I wouldn't even say, I wouldn't consider it cheating because we weren't together.

Together.

Got it, got it.

We were just like cohabiting.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you have other children?

Yes, I have an older daughter.

Older daughter. Mm-hmm. So do you support your other child? Yes. Okay, great. And you pay child support?

Yes. How much? I think now, I think she's at $600.

Okay, got it, got it, got it. And how long were y'all together?

Before that, 2.5, 3 years.

2.5, 3 years. And so do you want to be her father?

It's gonna hurt me now because I've been around so long.

Yeah.

I enjoy, you know, being who I am, you know.

Got it.

But, you know, we live and we learn, you know. Sometimes, you know, these things take turns.

So just so the context, the reason I asked that, because he's paying child support for this child that you don't even know is yours.

Right.

Like you're there, There's money coming in. You've been around her, so it's not as if you found this information out and then you said no. You've been around her.

I've been around, yeah, since day one. Picture was just, that was the birthday.

Birthday. Well, I think it's time to hear Rochelle's side of the story. So everyone please welcome Rochelle to the show.

Now Mark, you know you lying for real. You know damn well that you are not a parent for real, for real. Let's keep it real on some real shit. I have to put you on child support 'cause you didn't wanna pay $22 for daycare. Let's be real.

Which was paid the week before.

It doesn't matter. It does matter. I don't care if you paid daycare the day before. It need to be taken care of if it need to be taken care of. I shouldn't have to constantly tell you. If you been a parent before me, you should already know the things that come with being a parent, period. I shouldn't have to constantly be telling you, Mark daycare due this week. Mark Marley need pull-ups. Mark Marley need sneakers. Our daughter, she a little thick. She big, she 4. She wearing a 6 in clothes.

Let me ask a question.

Hold on, let me finish what I'm saying. You already said what you said. You, that whole stuff about my dad calling you, that's a lie. My dad never called you about nothing. My dad don't even like you. So what is he gonna call you for?

So his dad, your dad never contacted his dad?

My dad don't even know what I got going on personally because to be real, me and my dad don't even really have a relationship ourselves. So my dad don't know what I got going on.

That's a lie.

Back to what I was saying, like I said, I was talking.

Listen, now I'm talking. That's a lie. What was said?

Go ahead, 'cause you can continue to make this audience think that you this angel that you not. You not no angel, let's keep it real, Mark. You ain't talk to your daughter, Sir Lane. I haven't talked to your daughter in a year. I never came to portray behavior.

I told my truth. I told my truth on this stage. All right, so hold on. Okay, now I never, did I say, did I say, we can rewind this. I never said her dad called me.

Yeah, you said he called her mom.

I said her dad reached out to somebody else, right?

My dad don't even want no encounter with his mom at all.

I need to make sure.

Stop lying. Let's keep it real.

We gonna be honest about it.

We gonna be 'cause we really need help with this co-parenting. Let's keep it real.

There's no reason for me to lie about it.

Okay, cool, cool, cool. But you're also saying that for you, Now outside of that, you're saying that he has not been the best co-parent for a year?

No, the entire of our relationship. But me being dumb and being in love with him, me being a provider of the household, he was not being no parent. He was not. I had to constantly keep him getting a job. I was the one working 3 jobs. I had to get a job.

Oh my Lord. Like you had to move to my mom's house. You had to move to my mom's house.

I didn't have to move to your mom's house. I have my own crib. But I was pregnant. You was losing your apartment.

Being on your shit. You were losing your apartment.

So I went to go stay with them quarantine or whatever. But I had my own apartment.

Quarantine. That's what we gonna call it. We gonna call it quarantine.

But she moved to my mom's house because she was losing her apartment.

Did you tell my producers that until a few weeks ago he hadn't seen his daughter in a year?

He has not seen his daughter in a year and a half because he felt like he could not separate the fact of us breaking up. And I was reaching out to him like, yo, hey, we moved down to South Carolina. So I'm like, hey, your daughter's in preschool now. And like she's doing this, like trying to reach out, like still trying to be the bigger person in the situation. 'Cause at the end of the day it's about Marley. It ain't about what we had going on. Yeah, I cheated on him at the end of our relationship. I didn't cheat on him the entire relationship.

That's a lie.

So was he ever a good father to your daughter?

No.

Never?

No. I had to tell him to do stuff. When I first had our daughter, I had a C-section, and like I said, I had a baby right before me and him got together. So I didn't give my body enough time to heal. So I had a rough pregnancy and a birth with her, with daughter. So it was hard for me to get up and do certain things. So I would ask him to do things. He would get mad and start this suicide shit because he was in his feelings. Like, let's be real. I would tell him, y'all, your daughter need a bottle. Let me go get this. And then having an attitude about shit that you need to be doing.

But I wasn't there. Remember that.

Just because you was there physically, physically driving me to the places, it was not me that you was a parent. When you're a parent, you're an emotional parent. You're physical. You're financial. All of that. That all comes with being a parent. Not you just being in the household.

Is there a chance that he is not the father?

No.

No chance at all?

No, I had just had, like I said, I just had a baby. I had sex before my 6-month, I mean my 6-week time with him, so.

But you was laid up with the next before that. That's why I was told that this baby might not be my child.

Dude, I was never laid up with nobody at all.

Why did he move in with you 3 weeks ago?

Basically we just want some stuff, like we trying to, he's trying to get back in his daughter's life supposedly. But I really believe it's because he wants to be taken off child support. That's what I think it is for him.

Are you planning on staying there?

To be honest, on some shit, like, I heard it in her voice where she needed some kind of help. So I'm gonna try to come and give my help, right? But in the same breath, you're nodding your head yes. Hold on, hold on.

No, I do need help.

Hold on, hold on.

Let me say this.

No, no, you have the floor, you have the floor, right?

I said before you came down there, I said, remember what we went through in our past relationship? How I was arguing with you every time a bill needed to be paid. If you come down here, we cannot have that same situation.

You know why it was an argument? I'm gonna tell you why it was an argument.

It shouldn't have been an argument.

I'm gonna tell you why it was an argument.

No, no, no, it's not.

Have y'all been sleeping together?

No, no. I'm gonna tell you why. This is why it'll be an argument. If the bill was $150, why are you telling me you need $240?

Because your daughter needs this, this, and this.

It's always my daughter. It's never, never my daughter. Listen, let me say something to you, right? If you pay child support, whatever the fuck you get in child support takes care of the child.

If that's what his belief is, that's on him. And that's why he will continue to be on child support. Am I wrong?

Am I wrong for that?

Yes.

Well, there's extra needs. Sometimes it doesn't cover everything.

But the same deal. Okay, lemme say this though. Lemme say this though, right? So what am I gonna give extra when I'm working 40 hours this week at this job, right? Second job, another 30 hours, right? When I get my check every week, it says $1.50 because all this child support coming out my—

That's a part of being an adult. There's times where I get my check and I have negative $27 left out of my check.

Let me ask y'all something, right?

Let's be real, sometimes I gotta overdraft my account because I have to do certain things.

But I don't get an extra business.

$120 a week.

I don't get coming to me. No, that's what's coming to me.

No, that's what I'm trying to ask you.

What the $120?

Well, you should have did what you were supposed to do from the beginning. We would never been on child support.

No, no, what I need to know is we need to solve this DNA mystery.

That's all I'm worried about.

All that extra stuff, I'm not concerned about. That's the most important time. I think it's time for the DNA test. In this envelope is a DNA truth that Mark, I know you have questions for. So this is your truth to open, not mine. Open it.

Yeah. 'Cause like I went through a lot of shit with this.

Yeah. Like a lot of shit. I hear you.

Come on with this shit though.

This shit ain't emotional. See, that's why. See, that's why. They're starting to get a picture of who the fuck you are.

I don't care about none of that at all. Open that paper. That's what we came here for, right?

I see you shaking. What does it say? She's mine. She's mine.

Now are you gonna be there for your daughter the way you're supposed to be there for her?

Like I've been there for my daughter.

No, Mark, come on. We really came here for help. That's what real people do. We really came here for help and we really gonna be honest because I wanna get the real.

Be honest. You not being honest.

Okay.

Well, if I, hold on, let me tell you because the opinion that matters right now is mine. And I will tell you. No, no, no, look, I'm gonna tell you. No, I'm gonna tell you this. It's like, man, no, no, no, no, no. You hold on now. I've given you an opportunity. I've given you an opportunity. You hold on now. What I've noticed that I think that there's truth in both of your feelings and your statements. I don't believe you're wrong. I don't believe you're wrong. I believe that each of you, and I'm listening to it about like how the child support went, for the daycare went, how each of these moments went. I believe that you are trying to do the best you can. And then you're also saying that I need this in a different way, but you're not able to give it to her that way. And so it's causing this confusion. And you're saying, listen, but I'm giving, I'm doing, I'm showing up. Then I also understand there was a time period where you said, you know what, I can't deal with this. And because of that, you decided to leave this. And in that time period, you also left your daughter. And I do believe there's some truth in that as well. But I also believe because you're paying the child support, you were like, but I never really left.

Left.

So this is the thing, in order for y'all to co-parent, y'all gotta learn how to coexist. And y'all don't know how to coexist.

There is no coexist when everything is your way.

It's not about being my way. I only care about what my daughter's way. Karamo, I don't care about, I can take him off of child support. I only want him there physically for my daughter. Like I just sat here and told you, I know what it feels like to not have your daughter.

Who's gonna decide that enough is enough?

I've been deciding enough is enough.

No, no, no, you're not. Let me tell you why you're not.

It's one road.

Let me tell you why you're not. Listen, it's not a one way.

At some point. It's not a one way, bro.

At some point, the person who decides enough is enough decides not to respond.

That's why I stay the fuck away because enough is enough.

It doesn't mean staying away to say enough is enough. It means to say when I'm engaging in conversation with my co-parent, I'm not gonna scream. I'm not gonna match your levels. I have had my son's mother on this stage and we have talked about our co-parenting time.

But your son's mother ain't this girl. I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but she's not.

But hold on, can I tell you something? My son's mother had her own anger. She had her own issues. And at some point I had to say, so what's gonna be best for my child? And I talked about this very publicly. At some point I had to say, you know what? It's not that I'm gonna allow disrespect, 'cause I'm not ever saying you'd be disrespected, but at some point it's like re-engaging and re-arguing about this and that. What is it doing? I'm gonna ask you this man to man.

I'm asking you woman, what is it doing?

I don't care about the child support. I'll take you off of child support. All I'm worried about is you being there physically for your daughter and being there emotionally. We just found out that she may be autistic. So I have to learn how to navigate through that situation. And I need her dad there. I can't, I don't know how to work with that. My daughter's 4, I'm still trying to potty train her. I don't know what else to do. And I feel like I'm alone even though he maybe, he has been there or whatever for the last couple of weeks. But I've been dealing with this for the last year and a half. I potty trained my daughter, my first daughter when she was 2, my daughter 4. I'm doing something wrong.

We're gonna work something out with that, so go ahead.

I didn't say the water was. In this conversation, she's tried to match you. I don't know what happened before, but she said, "If you want me to take you off, I won't." But what she's also expressed is that, "I'm feeling alone in this situation. I'm feeling..." And every time she says that, you get upset.

Look at what I'm saying. You know why I keep getting upset? Because it's lie after fucking lie.

Do you not want peace in your own life?

Listen, I got peace. I had peace. What I'm trying to say is this, right?

You don't got peace. I'm watching you on this stage. You don't got peace.

This is where I'm getting to. It's lie after lie after lie. Nothing happens unless you get what the fuck you wanna get.

Okay, well, I'm gonna tell you this. What I do know to be true is that at the end of the day, you now know that's your daughter. You're happy about it. The lack of communication in this situation is going to be the downfall, not only for you two and your own personal peace, but the downfall for that little girl because she will always grow up in a house where she feels like she is the reason for arguments. And I, as someone who's worked in child protection services, work with kids for a long time, they will inadvertently and unconsciously take on that my parents are arguing because of me. I feel good. Because every time they hear child support, the main part of that is child. So as they're hearing and they say she's going to pre-K now, she's cognitively gonna pick up all on all of this. So what I'm trying to show you and tell you is that as much as you wanna defend this point, as much as you wanna be heard, I understand. I have not one point told you need to be disrespected. I've not one point said that you should and not find your own peace. But at some point you have to say enough.

You get the picture.

Yeah, but I also get the picture. And hopefully when y'all both watch this back, you'll see what I'm talking about. One day you're gonna learn. Listen, all I know is I wish y'all the best of luck. I'm sorry for where y'all at right now. And I do hope that y'all get there. Y'all are gonna be great parents. I do believe y'all can be that. And I just, I hope that the co-parenting can get better. You know what I mean? So I wish y'all the best of luck, seriously, I really do.