Your Mother Lied, I'm Not Your Real Father! | KARAMO

I feel like I've been lied to for 23 years. When Jade's mother got pregnant, you know, she told me the baby was mine. I was an active parent Jade's entire life. And then just last year, I'm finding out, talking to my daughter, or who I think is my daughter, I'm like, you know, I would've been there when you was born. She's like, nah, he was there. He who? It's the fun part. I find out Jade's mother had been with another man while she was with me. He was at Jade's birth. He celebrated birthdays and holidays with her on different days. He got to see her on the actual birthday. I got, like, her birthday's May 23rd, so it's like I would have the 15th, but he's got the 23rd. It's like I was part-timing another man's daughter. I spent a lot of money on Jade, so if it turns out that she's not mine, I'm gonna be pissed. I can't even think of everything I bought her. Money-wise, it's been over $60,000. Well over. I told Jade that, you know, if it turns out that I'm not her dad, I definitely have to walk away because I feel like she's had the best of both worlds, 'cause if I don't get it, he does. If he don't get it, I do. It's her mother's fault I'm in this position, and I need answers.

All right, we'll talk to Horace shortly, but let's start with Jade's side of the story. So everyone please welcome Jade to the show. So as we were both hearing what he was saying in that video, you were nodding your head the entire time. So how do you feel about what he said?

I feel like he didn't tell the whole truth.

Okay, what was the truth?

He was in and out of my life as he pleased. He really didn't want anything to do with me until after I was over 18.

Okay.

He's gotten me one birthday present and it was a present my mother told him not to buy me. Which was a cell phone.

So he never gave you any birthday gifts other than that one? He was in and out of your life?

My mom was mom and dad. Got it. Christmas. And she would always give me presents from him because she didn't want me to feel like he didn't care.

Okay. 'Cause I was gonna ask you.

But she never once threw him under the bus.

Never once. Because I was gonna ask you, how was Horace as a father? But it sounds like he wasn't that good to you.

No.

Not at all. Was he there for you emotionally at all?

Sometimes.

Sometimes.

A lot of things have happened where he doesn't believe me in what I say and That's not okay.

Yeah, what do you mean?

I'm your daughter. You're supposed to stand by my side, be my hero, be my whatever, you know?

And you mean you would tell him stuff that were happening to you that was going on in your life, you needed support, and he wouldn't believe you?

Right.

Got it. So what happened when you visited Horace at 14? Hoo.

Me and his wife got into a little scramble. And he kicked me out at 5 o'clock in the afternoon. Not on the safest part of Rochester. And finally at midnight, my mom came and got me, but before they came and got me, my brother had snuck me out a portable phone charger. He had went somewhere and he pulled back in and saw the light from the portable phone charger and took it and then continued to throw all my stuff in the road.

And how old were you at that point?

I was 14.

14 years old. 14 years old. I'm so sorry that happened to you. How did you first learn that Horace might not be your father?

Me and my mom were having a heart-to-heart and she was like, honestly, I was with the other man way before, like for way longer. And then he told me he was leaving to go pursue college and that's when I met your father.

So you've known about this other guy's for years?

About 2 years.

2 years.

But he's always been involved in my life.

Always been involved in your life? Always. And when he was involved in your life, did you have any inclination? I know you just found directly 2 years ago, but those other times, did you just see like, well, did you call him uncle or like that was a family friend?

Me and his kids grew up together. They were always at the house. You know, we were like brother and sister anyways. He checks on me pretty much every day to see if I'm okay.

Still to this day?

Yeah.

Wow.

Yep.

Okay.

And honestly, I feel like, not to be rude, but he has been there more than Horace has been.

You got it. So who did you know as your father growing up?

Horace. And I let him be in and outta my life as he pleased because I wanted that father figure.

That father figure, okay. What was Horace's reaction when you told him the news?

He was pissed and he said, if it turns out you're not mine, I'm probably gonna go to jail 'cause I'll kill your mother.

He said, I'm gonna kill your mother? Whether it's figuratively.

Basically his words, yes.

So yeah, whether you're joking or not, to tell that to the child is so damaging and hurtful and I'm so sorry.

Well, there's times when I was little and he would be in and outta my life and he'd text my mom outta the blue, you can tell her she's dead to me. She's like, how am I gonna tell an 8-year-old? That her father says she's dead to him.

Mm-mm-mm. Oh God, I'm so sorry. So has Horace treated you any differently since finding out he might not be your father?

Yeah, so he was supposed to buy me a TV for my new apartment and now it's, "Oh, I'm not buying you anything until I know if you're mine or not." Mm, got it.

So when was the last time you've seen Horace?

2 to 3 months ago.

2 to 3 months ago.

2 years ago.

Okay. And do you feel like your relationship is really estranged right now?

He's been more in contact with me since I turned 18, since I've been over 18. But anytime before that, I don't really remember him being there.

'Cause how old are you?

I'm 22.

22.

Okay.

Said 23. I'm not even 23. I'm 22.

22. Got it. I think it's time to hear what Horace has to say about all of this. So please welcome Horace to the show. How do you feel about what was just said?

Which part do you want me to quote?

Any part you feel like is BS.

I think though, I think the only thing that she got right next to my name was the fact that she asked me for a TV and I did take her other sister shopping and I did say, I kind of wanna fall back because I don't know if she's mine or not because I don't wanna spend money on another man's child.

How do you feel you've been as a father?

I mean, great. Compared to her mother?

My mother was my mom and my dad for 18 years.

Why are we here?

Because you wanted to find out and I wanted to find out as well. You wanted to find out what?

If who's your father? So we're here because your mom couldn't decide who she wanted to fuck.

That is not true and you are not to talk about my mom.

Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no. Let's call it what it is. We 100% sure know that's your mother.

Uh-huh.

We 100% know That's your mom. There's no denying that.

Okay.

Tell me what your father's name is. Okay then, so we're not here because of anything I may have did or not did 21-some-odd years ago, okay?

But my question is, from your opinion, how do you feel like you were a father? Yes, we understand that because of the mother's decision, I agree with you, you are here because of this. And neither you nor you deserve not to have that clarity, but For the most of her life, you were under the impression that you were the only man, that you were the father. So what I'm trying to get context is, those years when you knew you were the father, when you believed you were the father, do you believe that you were in her life and that you supported her?

Yeah.

Okay.

I was there when I was called upon. And then if she got mad, if your mother got mad, it was, well, she's XYZ's anyway.

No.

How old were you to say no? How old were you? You were like a baby, so you can't say I didn't hear that. Of course, you wouldn't know anything.

If you knew back then, why didn't you get it done when I was born?

Because I, and there's a very good reason for that, because I was not on your birth certificate, so I couldn't take your mother to court, not legally being your father.

What was your reaction when you found out you may not be Jade's father?

I was livid, but like, There are certain instances in the past that like didn't add up to me. But then when the other person came into play, it's like all those dots started to connect.

Got it. So all this started making sense. How many kids do you have total?

Biologically?

Biologically.

Yeah. 6.

You have 6 kids biologically. Okay.

Why? So what happened when my mom had to find plans when I was only 8 years old and you put me on the curb on the South Side? Because your wife didn't want me in the house.

First off, anytime at that time my wife said anything to you and I didn't like, she got checked.

Do you feel protected?

Okay, but you checked me when she told you what she told you in Rochester and kicked me out at 5 o'clock in the afternoon.

I remember the Rochester one very well because you flipped out and I was like trying to get calmer heads in the whole house and you walked out and I said, "Fine, you wanna go, go. I'm not gonna deal with it." That's not what happened, but okay.

You can ask my brothers. They'll tell you the same thing. They snuck me out a portable phone charger and when you got home, you took it from me and threw all my shit in the road.

I did not.

Yes, you did. You threw everything in the road.

Wow.

And I took a picture and sent it to my mother of all my stuff in the road.

My whole thing is, where the fuck is this coming from?

Do you talk to all your kids this way?

The ones that are disrespectful.

I have a reason to be disrespectful.

Well, we have some texts you sent Jade's mother, Tonya, over the weekend. Can I see the text? Okay, years you hid your biggest secret and I guarantee the world will know what type of person you are, you piece of. So you're angry at her because of what has happened here. Were you angry before this?

I've been angry. She knows this. We've had this conversation. 22 years, I'm like, I have to know. I said, and I told her, I said, regardless, I said, I'm gonna love you. I said, but if you not mine, I gotta think, was that little girl my daughter or somebody else's kid hugging me?

[Speaker:KARAMO] Yeah, I understand now, there's a lot I'm getting. Okay, well it looks like we have a ping and my producer told me it's from Jade's grandmother, Elise. What did she say?

[Speaker:STEVE] Oh, this needs to be good.

[Speaker:ELISE] This is Elise, Jade's grandmother on her mother's side. Horace has never been a part of Jade's life. We've all taken care of Jade and loved her without proving she was ours or not. It doesn't matter if he's her father or if he isn't because he's never paid a nickel or anything for her except make promises he never kept. I don't wanna be the bearer of bad news for Horace, but SD doesn't stand for super dad. It only stands for sperm donor.

Oh!

Spoken like a true female narcissist. She's spoken like a true one. And I commend her mom for even her grandma.

You would know that, wouldn't you?

What, about narcissism? Yeah, 'cause I've read up on it a lot in females. I dated one, that was your mom. Whoops. So she feels that I've never done anything for her.

Yeah. Well, speaking of that, because she said that you got a settlement and that you took her sister out, why didn't you spend any money on Jade?

Because, and she knows why.

She can act like she don't know why, But you told me prior when you were getting the settlement, you were taking all of us shopping.

All of my kids.

And I was included in that? 'Cause you said it was gonna be us girls and then you were gonna take the boys.

This is also, I did say that, but—

Because you don't believe she's your kid.

It's not, it's the doubt. It's like I said, I don't want to, 'cause like she knows I don't give, I don't really give a lot about money. 'Cause if I got it, they got it. If I can't get it, I will get it. So when it comes to that, I didn't care about spending that money on them. But at the same time, if you're mine, I'm going to give you that world. I'm going to like, here, I don't care.

[Speaker] I gotta say this because I don't believe your language is proper, the way you talk to your daughter. I don't believe your relationship is, or potential daughter, I don't believe that's healthy. But hold on, let me say this. But I do understand your doubt for years. Because from what you're telling me and what it sounds like you told me a little bit is that your mother has said consistently and over and over again in bouts of controlling you or using you as manipulation said, she's yours, then the next minute you're not. It sounds like you've had that over and over again throughout your life, am I correct?

Yeah.

Again, I don't excuse language or behavior because as the adult, you could have immediately found the answer so that way you could have had the healthy relationship you want. So I get that. But hold on because I'm a very fair person. I see all sides. But in the same essence, I do get if someone is telling me that every single day, I'd have been like, okay, I can't do none of this no more. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of it. And so I think because of that, a lot of the anger and hatred and the way you communicate with her has went on to your daughter or potential daughter. I think a lot of that has went over here and I think that's where it gets unhealthy for me. Well, before we get to the results, Horace, I want you to take a look at a message that Jade's mother, Tonya, sent you.

Horace, you've never once stepped up for your daughter. You're telling people you've spent over $60,000 on her? I've never seen a dollar and you have spent not one cent on this child. You used to pay her to give you a hug and then ask for the money back. Horace, you've done more damage than you could ever even realize that you've done to my daughter. You need to stop lying and man up.

Ooh.

Mm, but let's back up just one small second, 'cause at the end of the day, what that got to do with her mother sleeping with two men?

Well, what I think is—

It was based—

Well, what I think—

Well, what I do—

Well, hold on, well, 'cause what I say this is that what I do think is true in that statement, again, is that as much as I can acknowledge you going back and forth and not having clarity, what she's saying to you is regarding the damage of this young woman is that if you weren't clear, then that's where you should have said, let me find out.

I asked for a paternity test when she was 8 months old. I asked for another one when she was 2.

There's different pieces to all of this, and I'm acknowledging that you should have gotten those answers clear. But also I can acknowledge that if you didn't get them, You could have gotten them yourself, but what I'm happy about is that you've come to my show today and that you'll get that DNA truth. In this envelope is the DNA truth, Jade. This is not my truth to Oprah, this is yours.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

I just wanna take a minute and say that no matter what's in here, I'll be okay either way. I'm not ready to open it, sorry. Horace is your biological father.

So you now know the truth. This is your biological daughter.

Now I can just—

Yeah, it's setting in now. Because the pain of not knowing the truth have never been projected onto your daughter. And that's what happened.

It was never projected onto her.

I get it, I get it. I'm telling you from just an outside perspective.

I understand that, but everybody looks at me like I'm the villain, but no one understands that I was the hero that got turned into the villain.

I wanna clear something with you, I don't think you're a villain and I don't think her mother was a villain, but I do believe there was a child that got caught in between adults that should have made better choices. We spent 22 years it being about y'all two. This moment is for her. Anything you wanna say to your daughter?

What you wanna do after this?

I'm going home.

Me too. No, it's like, just come here. Stop playing.

Don't mess up my hair, please.

Yeah, she's mine. She just said don't mess up her hair. I know, it's not like me and her, it's like this whole situation is why she's the way she is.

I get it, I get it.

And I get that, but I want her to know I love her and she knows.

But that's not what I said. I was trying to help you to see what it is, is that 22 years of a relationship that has been confusing has caused her her to be hurt. And all I'm asking you to do is apologize to her for that.

I understand that, but—

If you understand it, then just give her the apology she deserves.

I can't.

Well then. Wow. Well then what I do is I'm glad that you have your answers and I hope that you all can, you get to a place where you can do that because that will be the most important step in the growth of your relationship and the healing of you, okay? So I wish you the best, but I'm glad you got your answers. I really am. Good luck, all right? All right. Just give your children what they need so they can heal. Seriously. It's not fair, and I don't understand why parents don't get that. If you bring children in this world and you make a mistake, just do what you gotta do to help them to heal. No? And you over here still making jokes. She don't need your jokes right now. Your little girl's crying. Sorry, I had to get that off my chest.