Gunn High School Commencement Speech 2015

And our audience. This person is a serial tech entrepreneur. He's CNBC's Innovator of the Decade, and he has a highly acclaimed TED Talk. I'd like to introduce to all of you Kevin Surace. I got the Italian pronunciation today, or Surace in American. That's very— thank you. So it's really an honor to be here to address the 52nd graduating class. No, no, what is it? Something like that. It really is an honor, and I have to say that when you think about commencement speakers, first of all, very few people ever remember who their commencement speaker was and what he or she had to say. And I'm sure you will feel that way about me as soon as I'm done. And in fact, a lot of commencement speakers get up here and they stoically read, you know, success, and you're going to do something different, and this is how you're going to change the world. But if you wanted that stoic speech, you could go down the street to Pally High to their graduation and get it there. We're not going to do that. The superintendent said okay. So we're going to try to have a little bit of fun. We'll raise this just a little bit. So I really wanted to think about instead the meaning of your life. So when I look back from my graduation on, there's lessons that I've learned. There's things that happened to me There's good things, there's bad things, there's things I've seen in friends. And I said, maybe I can leave a few of those golden nuggets to you, with you here today. And so I'm going to talk a little bit about success, a little bit about friends and friendships, and most importantly, happiness. Now, Gunn, obviously this year, hard year for Gunn High School, hard year for many of you in many, many, many ways. We won't go into all of them, but one of them that I can relate to and that in talking to many of the students here that I heard over and over again was that there's so much pressure and so much peer pressure and so much thought all the way from kindergarten on to what school am I going to get into, what college am I going to get into. And I'm here to tell you, first of all, that 80% of you don't get your first choice. And second of all, it doesn't matter. It really doesn't matter. It really does— I can honestly say it doesn't matter. In the long run in your career, it won't matter. It won't matter for your career success, nor will it make you a happier human being. And that's what's really important. And the stats here are very clear. There's some 3,500 colleges and universities in the US alone. Go to one. Go to anyone. Don't! Whatever! It'll all work out, trust me! More than that, I use the term career success. So now I want to dig into that a little bit. What is career success anyway? Ever think about that? And how will you achieve it? And why will you achieve it? So I'm going to ask you for one of the last things that someone will ask you to do in high school. Everybody in the graduating class, Look to your left and look at the person on your left. Okay, some of you look to your right. Okay, look to your left. Now look to your right. This is a very good exercise and it's very true. The person to your left and the person to your right, relatively statistically, and certainly in this demographic, has approximately the same IQ as you do. Now think about that. Don't argue about it. It's statistically true. Now here's the problem with that. How are you How are you going to differentiate yourself from them? Because now you start thinking all the way till now, you go, well, I'm going to be smarter and I'm going to be the— well, they're approximately as smart as you are. And in fact, look around, they're all approximately as smart as you are, which means your IQ is not going to differentiate you going forward. So how will you differentiate yourself? And I'm going to tell you the way you're going to do it has much more to do with EQ than it does with IQ. Does everyone know what EQ is? Emotional quotient. Emotional quotient. Okay? That's how you interact with other people and how you see yourself and how they see you. Now, to move up in life and to have that kind of career success, you need to totally rock EQ because the IQ is a given. You went to Gunn, you graduated from Gunn. IQ is a given. So you're going to have to differentiate yourself now going forward on EQ. And career success If you want to rise up that ladder, whatever that ladder is in your mind, you're going to need the people around you to raise you up. And they're not going to raise up the smartest person. They're going to raise up the person they really like and trust the most. So you have to think about that going forward, because those are some of the things that you didn't get in high school that you're going to need going forward. In fact, many of the things that got you here this is a really seminal moment in your life won't now get you there. And that's probably why I think it's one of the most seminal moments you'll have. Now, the number one predictor of career success is actually tied to EQ as well. Many institutes did this work, and several colleges did this work, and they looked for a common thread among the most successful people in the US. A common thread. And it wasn't going to an Ivy League college. It wasn't their grades. It wasn't what program they went to. It wasn't their IQ. It wasn't the degree. It wasn't any of that. The common thread— this was a great study recently done, actually, that really defined it— the common thread among the most successful people in the US, which was the predictor of success, was the number of connections they had from different spaces in their life. That is a large and varied open set of networks. That is how many friends they had, if you really want to get down to it. How many people that they still remembered from their very first job? How many people they were still friends with from high school 35 years later? And that person could call on them and they'd say, I'm so glad I remember you. I'm so glad you called me. Yes, I have something for you. Come in. Very, very interesting. Not something you were taught. And it turns out it's the most consistent predictor of career success. Now, now that you have that secret, you have the secret, the secret's out of the bag, is career success all that matters? And is it only measured by how much one makes? Because at this point in your career so far, you've been thinking, well, I've got to get this great job and I've got to make a lot of money because that's how I measure career success. And it's the wrong goal. That is not the right goal. I'd argue real success in life is defined by your happiness, not defined by how much money you make. Thank you. The one person who clapped. No, thank you. I appreciate that. Career, friends, and family, and activities, and hobbies, and travel, or whatever it is in your life, it's not determined by how much money you make. Many people decide on a career path that does not pay the most. And the one I can point out the most is teachers. They are the best example of people who chose a career path that are sitting here today because what brought them happiness is to see you graduate. And if they wanted the most money, they would have gone to Hollywood, they would have gone into tech, they would have done something else. But what made them happy is to watch you graduate and to pass on their knowledge in whatever course subject it was to you. And in fact, money not only doesn't buy happiness— we've all heard that— some of the most successful people that I know and that I've ever met have been the most unhappy I've ever seen. Career certainly can add to your happiness, and you might invent new products or manage people or create new marketing messages or sell products or teach students. But whatever it is, be sure you pursue and excel at the items which make you the most happy. Pursue the things that make you the most happy. Friends add a ton to happiness. Family even more. Money, not so much. Without this blowing away, my last notes here. So after leaving Gunn, you already have your IQ and you're already on a path To some career for sure. Now let's start to focus on what will really bring you happiness. The things you were not taught in school. A career that really makes you excited and passionate. Make and keep and cherish your friendships. Love your family. Have hobbies. Always have hobbies that you love. They will fill out the rest of your life. Have loves in your life. My beautiful wife right there. Love you. Erica. Erica, hi Erica. Have loves in your life. Love your family and cherish them every day. If each day, every minute of the day, you do what makes you happiest, you will achieve far more than career success. You will get to really live, and that is what life is about anyway. If you want to change the world, start by changing your world first. I'll say it again, if you want to change the world, Start by changing your world first. Happy people can change the world. Unhappy people do not. Set your own path and let others watch in awe, amazement, or even confusion. Who cares? Set your path and execute it. I'm going to close with this. One of the happiest things that I get to do in life is I also participate in music, and I'm a music director for musicals, including High school musicals, and I was a music director in March for a musical down in Santa Clara at a high school called You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown. Yay! Some of you know that musical. One of the things I like about music and sports is they're team-oriented things that you get to do, and you build camaraderie in that team because the team has to be successful as a team. You can't put on a musical yourself. It won't work. You can't play football all by yourself. You clearly won't win the game. So what I liked about The Good Man Charlie Brown is it closes with a song called Happiness. And it didn't dawn on me until sort of outlining this speech that what they said and what they wrote to close the musical and to close that song actually had meaning here. And here's how that went. Happiness is anyone And anything at all that's loved by you. I know. At least you'll remember your commencement speaker saying, which is clearly outside the norm. So look, after that, please go forth after today. Make friends, and for goodness' sake, pursue your happiness. Congratulations. Thank you.