Turn Conflict Into Understanding

11 Sept 2025 · 1 min

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In this segment, the speaker emphasizes the importance of recognizing that each person views situations through personal "lenses," meaning that opinions are subjective perceptions rather than objective truths. He outlines a structured, consent‑based conflict‑resolution process: first, all participants state their viewpoints as facts and these are logged; then, each viewpoint is examined individually with the participant’s agreement to explore deeper meanings. The speaker stresses that successful engagement in this inquiry requires three key qualities—awareness of one’s own lenses, willingness to engage in the process, and coachability (the ability to participate openly in the inquiry). These elements together enable teams or individuals to move from surface‑level conflict to deeper understanding.

Chapters

Once we're aware that, first of all, we have those lenses, that's a huge breakthrough. Like acknowledging that my perception of anything that's happening out of me is just my perception and it's not automatically true. That's a great place to start. Yeah. So if you think of a conflict between people about something and everyone says their opinion, they say it as the truth typically. Okay. So we do the first round and everyone says what they said. And we log that. And then we go one by one and evaluate. Of course, this is done with consent of the team that they're open, willing to look at this deeper than what's said. This on its own is a breakthrough for some teams. Not only teams, sometimes an individual wouldn't be willing to do the work. So you need to have the awareness. You need to have the willing. And then you need to be what we call coachable, kind of like participate in the inquiry.