089: A positive attitude for manifestation

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Wayfair. Every style, every home. Hello everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Connie Crystals, the podcast. I hope that you're all well. My name is Mart, I'm your host, and this week I've got a little bit of a sore throat because guess what? We went on a cruise. Yes. So I had the aircon on pretty much the entire time we were away, so my throat is a little bit drier than usual. So I do apologize if I cough. Might have caught Francesca Amber's black lung, who knows? But yeah, the cruise was phenomenal. I knew that it was going to be good, but I just didn't expect it to be that good, if that makes sense. I do think I'm a bit of a cruise convert, if I'm totally honest with you. It's weird, isn't it? Because even before we went, I knew that I was going to be sharing a cabin with Fran. Now, I've only met Fran twice before. Uh, once— well, actually, both times were at her house. Once was to record an episode of this podcast and her podcast about a year ago, and then once was, I'd say, about 6-8 weeks ago. And it was like we've never— it was just like we've never been away from each other. Like, we've known each other our entire lives. It was weird. Like, even people that we'd just met, we were talking to them and they were like saying, oh, how long have you known each other? And we're saying, about a year. This is only the third time we've actually met. They were like, what? They couldn't believe it. Yeah, it was just so nice to get away with Fran. Um, so let me recap for you because I had to get to Lincoln on the Tuesday. And oh my God, getting to Lincoln is such a ball ache. I had to change trains twice from Newcastle. Took me about 3 and a half hours to get down there. And then when I actually got down there, it was glorious sunshine, whereas when I left Newcastle, it was pouring down with rain. And by the time I got to Fran, I walked through her front door and she was stood there with her boobs out She was just saying, oh, excuse us for 2 seconds. One of the babies had just pooed themselves. Um, then I had an older daughter, Bo, just randomly come up to me, pull me in the kitchen, put on some Irish music, and start doing an Irish jig. And then Fran started getting a spray tan, and she's offering me a glass of rosé wine, and I was stood there like, what is going on? As you can imagine. But yeah, um, we didn't get to bed until about 11, midnight, something that night. We had to be up at 3 AM because we were leaving at 4 to drive to Birmingham Airport. So I got to bed at midnight. Uh, Bo wanted to sleep in the bed with me because she was just— yeah, she just thought I was amazing, basically, bless her. And she just wanted to stay with us. So Fran started packing her case at about half midnight. She had podcasts to record, she needed to put the, the girls to bed and stuff, so she had to wait until midnight before she could record the podcasts. And she packed a case. And I just remember my alarm went off, 3 AM that morning, and I got myself out of bed. I went straight into the shower just to like, you know, wake myself up. Got myself dressed, and I thought, I'll go downstairs and I'll make a cuppa. So I boiled the kettle, made myself a coffee, and you know, just when the house is like eerily silent, like I couldn't hear a thing, and I was thinking, is Fran actually awake? And then I heard her alarm go off, and I thought, okay, she's up. Don't worry. So got to 24, that we were supposed to be leaving in 4, like 20 minutes at 4 AM, and there still wasn't a peep out of Fran's room. So I just went upstairs and I thought, I'm gonna knock on the door. So I knocked on the door, nothing. I opened the door and the room— Fran has like blackout blinds or blackout curtains, I don't know, um, but the room was just pitch, pitch black. And I was like, oh my God, she isn't up. So I went in, I was like, Fran, Fran! I walked over to her and I started shaking her. I was like, Fran! Nothing, not a thing. And I was like, oh my God, is she dead? So I literally violently shook her and she just opened her eyes and went, what time is it? And I went, 20 to 4. And she went, give me 5 minutes. Honest to God, I was so stressed because I was like, we're gonna miss this flight. The flight wasn't until 8 AM, but it's a 2-hour ride from Fran's house to Birmingham. So yeah, so anyway, she come downstairs, 5 to 4. With a case and everything like that. The babysitter arrived 5 to 4 in the morning, bless her. Shout out to Megan, I know she listens. Um, and yeah, honestly, we were on the road at 4 AM and we just never shut up the entire way there. We had such a laugh. Uh, we got to Birmingham Airport for about quarter to 6, I think it was, because there was no traffic on the roads. Uh, we just made it in time for our flight by the time we'd had a quick breakfast. And Fran slept all the way there on the plane. I had my laptop out, was trying to like, you know, do a bit of prep for this event that we're doing. And we got there, we were whisked away from the airport to the cruise ship. Once we got on the cruise ship, we got took up to our room. Well, obviously, like, the blinds, the curtains and everything, they open automatically. Like, as soon as you scan your little wristband thing on the door, it just like, oh, the room was amazing. It even had these settings on the tablet that you could press, like called Let's Get It On, for example, and the whole room like turned like this red and pink. Yeah, it was just amazing. And we had like, um, a wind— sorry, a sea-facing cabin, so we had like a little terrace, like a little balcony, uh, with a couple of seats and a hammock. Honest to God, it was just incredible. And we thought, let's go and eat some food because we haven't ate since 6 AM, and this was about 3 o'clock in the afternoon now. We were both quite hungry. So we went to the Galley, which is where all the restaurants are. There's 23 restaurants on board this ship. 23. Um, a lot of them are on this one deck called the Galley. So you basically, you can either go and sit at your table and order what you want, or you can go up to each individual station kind of thing and bring your food back. So we just got some fruit, you know, some, um, what's it called, acai bowls, that kind of thing. Just while we were docked. And we had them and then we thought, let's go around the pool. So we got a little sun lounger, you know, most people were out exploring the city, whereas we just got there and we only had a couple of hours until we were due to depart anyway. So we thought, let's just stay on the boat. So we went and sat around the pool. Fran obviously ordered a bottle of rosé and we just started planning our one-night event. Now this one-night event, it's September 26th, um, in London at the Barbican. Tickets are on sale, they've been on sale for about 2 months now, and they are £40 a ticket. Please, if you want to come on your own, come on your own. You can buy a single ticket. It is unreserved seating, um, so you can literally sit wherever you want across the entire venue, which is great because loads of people are buying single tickets. There are so many of you in fact buying single tickets. I think about half of the ticket sales have been single tickets, which is absolutely amazing because it means that, you know, people are coming to this event and they wanting to network, they're wanting to meet new like-minded people. So it's great. Um, but we were able across the next few days on this cruise ship while we went to, you know, we went to Corsica, uh, where else did we go? Barcelona, Ibiza. Um, so while we went to all these different places, we were able to plan what we want to be talking about, what we wanted the show to actually be about, how we want the audience to like engage. And there's going to be so many surprises and things like that. So it is going to be an absolutely amazing event. So do not miss out. The tickets are available. The link is in my bio. We've also got a competition right now. So if you haven't seen the competition, head over to mine or Fran's Instagram, or both if you want double the chances. And all you need to do is make sure that you're following us both, share the story, and tag 3 friends that you would like to bring with you. So yeah, one of the things that we spoke about to each other while we're on the ship was the power of gratitude and how we were just so, so grateful because a lot of people, you know, like influencers and things like that, they get sent stuff like this to promote all the time, all the time. And they're probably not as grateful as we were. Like, it got to the point where me and Fran were just sat in the pool, um, and we were just talking to each other about our journeys and how grateful we were for like different aspects of it. And Fran started telling a story and I could like hear the cracking in her voice. And she had her sunglasses on, so I didn't know. But then she moved the sunglasses up and wiped away a tear. And I was like, that is the sheer power of gratitude. Like, we are sat here like so full of gratitude right now that it is literally bringing us to tears because we're so thankful for being sent on this like little trip. And yeah, I mean, we were there to promote it and stuff like that, but every single thing was paid for— the food, the alcohol, our cabin. Our flights and everything. Everything was included. It was absolutely incredible. Um, so because we both shared that gratitude and like shared it with each other and we sat there in that gratitude, later that evening, um, we were due to dock in Ibiza. Now one of the other guys that was on the cruise with us as part of our little group basically said, oh, by the way, I can get us into Wikiwoo in Ibiza. I've never heard of it, but check it out, it is amazing. It's like an Instagrammer's paradise. You'll have seen it on my stories if you haven't looked already. Um, it's also on a few of my posts on @marttweedy on, um, Instagram. But yeah, it was basically an Instagrammer's paradise. It was all pink, it was all like palm trees, there was like a phone box, there was a swing, there was like pink mopeds everywhere. And as soon as we basically sat down, the sun was setting directly behind us, so we got a perfect view of the Ibiza sunset. And if you've been to Ibiza, you know exactly what sunset. It looks like it is stunning. And we were sat there, and as we sat— we'd only been sat about 30 seconds— this huge Pornstar Martini, like, tree came and landed on the middle of our table with all these drinks with sparklers coming off it and things. 2 minutes later, there's a bottle of sangria, then there's rosé wine, then there was Prosecco, and then these nibbles turned up. And you know, they were all like, um, entrées, canapés, that kind of thing. And then we got steak and all the side trimmings and stuff like that. And I was like, oh my God, this is going to be so expensive. But I just sat in that gratitude and I was like, who even ordered all of this food? But anyway, this guy who had got us in there had basically paid for everything. So big shout out to Nick Eade if he's listening. Probably won't be, but someone that knows him might be and they might pass on my gratitude. But I am so, so thankful for Nick and Tony Truman who looked after us from Wikiwoo. Absolutely amazing people, and thank you so, so much. But they paid for everything. Honestly, I couldn't believe it. And I said to Fran, I was like, I am so, so grateful that we have just had all of that food and all of that drink for free. Um, and I'm not saying this to brag, I'm saying this to show you what the power of gratitude actually does. Like, we had just sat there that day and been so grateful for our lives, being so grateful for our journeys, being so grateful that we were in the Mediterranean to be able to plan our one-night event, and then we get more stuff sent to us. And that is the power of the universe. When you are grateful and you sit in that gratitude phase, when you're grateful for everything that you have, the universe does nothing but send you more of that because it says, okay, you like that, here's more of it. Okay, that's on your mind, here's more of it. And the same goes for negativity. You know, on the polar opposite. If you sit in that negativity constantly, the universe thinks, okay, you want more of that because you're thinking about it. You attract more of what you think about. So all I'm asking is that you go away from this podcast episode today and really like take into account all of your gratitude. That's why we do these gratitude lists, you know, first thing on the morning, why we start our day with 3 things to be grateful for. Or if you read The Magic, I think she asks you to do 10 things. But my 31 Days of Gratitude, for example, the challenge or the book, whichever one you have, every day you're thinking of 3 things to be grateful for. And it's just the perfect way to start your day, because when you are grateful for what you have, you are going to be given more by the universe. So something else that me and Fran did while we were there is that we were traveling along on the sea, and trust me, every single morning started with Fran opening the curtains going, oh my God, we're at sea! Like, as if we didn't know. So anyway, every day started like that. And I said to her, like, she was just looking over the balcony one day, and I was like, you know what we should do? And she was like, I wish I had something to chuck in the sea. And I was like, I was just thinking the same thing. I took a little pink Lemurian crystal with me, and I thought to myself, wouldn't it be great if we set our intentions with this, this crystal in our hand, the two of us? And then we returned it to the sea, and we returned it back to Mother Earth and back to Mother Nature, that kind of thing. And Fran literally looked at me and she was like, let's do it. So I put the crystal on palm of my hand, she put her hand over the top of me, and I just said, okay, let's visualize, you know, a full auditorium. We're at the Barbican, we're on stage, we're looking out, people are cheering, people are stood up on their feet, people are clapping. And I just thought to myself, sit in that phase, you know, sit in that. So we sat with that for about 30 seconds or so, and then I said, and now feel those emotions. How would we feel? How ecstatic would it make us feel? And once we both felt that the time was right, we got hold of that crystal and I chucked it into the ocean over the side of the ship. You're not supposed to chuck things over, I don't condone it, but Hey ho, it was a crystal. It was part of nature. So we took that over and Fran went, "Isn't that so magical?" And they went, "What?" And she went, "The fact that not one single other person on this earth will ever touch that crystal ever again." That had literally sunk to, you know, the bottom of the Med. We were in the middle of the sea. We were in the middle of nowhere. We were halfway between, I think we were halfway between Italy and Spain. But that's exactly what I mean. Like, there was literally no way that anyone could ever find that crystal ever, ever again. And that just made it feel so much more magical that we'd return this crystal back to the Earth. So that was our visualization. Make it happen, go and buy tickets. Shameless plug. Um, but yes, the next day we'd been, um, doing our gratitudes and things in our cabin that night as well. We're saying what we're grateful for, um, again. And the next day this other guy, um, shout out to Richard, Richard Squire, he basically said, um, I can get you guys into Nikki Beach, um, you don't have to pay for a bed. Because we'd been looking at going to Ocean Beach or something like that, but you had to pay for a bed and all the beds were taken. So it was going to be €25, which is nothing really, but that was just a stand. It would mean that you couldn't sit down all day. And I was like, do we really want to go and just stand like at an ocean beach club kind of thing? So anyway, Richard basically said to us, if you want to, we can get you into Nikki Beach. It's where all the celebs hang out, where all the celebs stay. There's a rooftop pool, you know, there's like a pool outdoors, there's a beautiful beach right next to it, and it is just so calm. It's in the southeastern part of, um, Ibiza. Get yourselves there and we'll look after you, we'll give you free drinks, free food, things like that. And we were like, we just couldn't believe what was happening. So again, we went there on the penultimate day, and what an experience. While we were there, we got food brought to us, we got drinks brought to us. Fran spent 3 hours in the pool. I was like a wrinkly prune, honestly. While we were in Corsica, actually, just to go back, Corsica in France, I came out of the sea and I lay on my front for about 15 minutes and fell asleep. And when I woke up, my back had burned. So the entire rest of the trip, I had to wear just a t-shirt when I was in the pool and things like that because I had Factor 30 on, but it had obviously just gone straight through because I'm ginger and I've got ginger skin. Yeah, fun times. So that is all peeling at the minute. I'm like a snake. But yes, I just wanted to say a massive, massive thank you to Hayley Spark for this entire week away because Hayley was the one that messaged me and Fran, you know, saying like, we've got this work trip coming up, did you guys want to come with us? Um, to promote it, that kind of thing. And it's all because of Hailey that this happened. And it's funny because Hailey was on the podcast, um, a few episodes ago. I say a few episodes ago, I'm talking about 30 or 40 episodes ago. And she was talking about, you know, having the power of a positive mindset. And I think that's what the episode was called actually, The Power of a Positive Mindset. Go and listen to it if you haven't already. It's my most listened to, um, episode actually of all time. So you'll obviously love it. Um, but yeah, big shout out to Hayley because Hayley was the one that got us on board this ship in the first place and got us involved with the travel company that, um, sent us away with it. So massive, massive, massive shout out. Go and follow her, she's @hayleysparkstv. Um, and yeah, some other amazing things are coming up between us working together with Hayley and Fran. Hayley's also going to be hosting our One Night Stand event in London. So she's a TV host, so we thought what perfect way then to incorporate the whole like thing together with Hayley actually presenting it. So there is going to be like a Q&A at the end, so we thought that would be the perfect opportunity for, you know, Hayley to run around the audience with the, the microphone and asking, uh, questions to us, that kind of thing. So yeah, cannot wait for that. And I guess that brings me to what I actually wanted to talk about in today's episode. So we've gone like right the way around the houses there, but I wanted to talk about kind of unlocking the power of positive emotions. So we talk about gratitude all the time, and like I've just said there about gratitude, but you know that song like, always look on the bright side of life. I should never ever sing on this podcast. I do apologize. Like, even when we're in the worst situations, like, is it possible that we can always look on the bright side of life? Probably not. But this is what we've got to, like, work out. Like, psychologists are discovering, like, ways of, you know, measuring and increasing our positive emotions on a daily basis so they can gauge the quantity and regularity of our positive emotions and, you know, the effect that they have on our general well-being. As well as the specific—

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Wayfair, every style, every home. Impact that they have on our social and professional lives. So we don't need to feel good all the time, just some of the time. It's like when I say to people, you know, raise your vibrations, or put some happy— like some happy music on, a happy playlist, or do what feels best for you, that kind of thing. We don't have to sit, you know, with a big Cheshire Cat grin on our face the entire time, okay? We just have to feel good about it in the moment, okay? So the power of positive emotions has just been— it's just been underestimated for far too long. So everyone knows that good feelings have a positive impact because they give us the energy to get more done. And our positive energy makes others like us better as well. But up until recently, people focused on negative feelings, you know, such as fear or anger. And that's because negative feelings can seem to have a more serious impact. For example, when you're on the way to, you know, depression, stuff like that, we're usually more aware of negativity, whilst positive ones are a more subtle experience. So why are negative feelings so much kind of louder? And that's because they have been crucial to our survival in our past, okay? So our ancestors, they intensely experienced negative feelings like fear when they're focused on a threat, for example, like a predator or an enemy. And I'm talking like caveman days here, so that they could concentrate all their energies on, you know, fleeing or fighting or whatever it is that they needed to do to survive. So in large doses, positive feelings such as love or joy or gratefulness or hope or pride, they can change our whole lives. And they often pass unnoticed, like I say. And that just makes us a bit more resilient and help guide us through many tough times. So you just need to, you know, try and notice those positive feelings, you know, a bit more than you do the negative, because a positive general attitude towards life is the key to happiness. Okay, and I know last week's episode was all about happiness, but this is kind of a continuation on— like, we are all born with the main ingredient of a happy life, and that's positive emotions. But few of us naturally experience enough of them to stay positive enough in hard times, like, you know, during a breakup or you might be dealing with a severe illness, that kind of thing. But those people who are lucky enough to experience mainly positive emotions have a generally, like, positive attitude towards life in general, and that makes them more resilient and successful. Because optimism makes people resilient against mental problems like depression or over-worrying. And because they always see the good in every situation, they can navigate through even, like, the hardest times without much trouble. And me and Fran had this conversation the other day while we're on the boat, and we said we used to be— before we did all this work, we would be quite negative people. We would look at things from a negative angle. And you know, like when the pandemic hit, for example, Fran pretty much lost everything. She was in the beauty business, so her salon had to close down. She had just given birth to twins. She wasn't allowed any help or support from her friends or family because we were going through the lockdown. She was at rock bottom. She lost loads of weight. She looked so gaunt and anorexic in the photos, and she was at rock bottom. Yeah, and she said before she did all of this work, she would look at that situation as being negative. But now that we've done the work, now that we've come out the other side, we can spin that as a positive experience. It got us to where we are today. It let us build our resilience. It, you know, drove us to where we are at this moment in time. So if you can find like positivity and happiness in even the darkest of times, you're on to a winner, okay? When you look at the world in a more open way, you will see opportunities and solutions where other people might only see problems and issues. So even when things seem to get bad, they'll search for the best way out, yeah? So all of this makes one thing clear: that anyone who wants to lead a happy, fulfilled life should aim for a generally positive attitude. And the key is to consciously increase the amount of positive emotions that you experience, because by doing that, you're going to gain a positive attitude. If you manage to experience more positive than negative emotions, okay, so like the, the scales are tipped, you're naturally going to end up with a positive attitude towards life. Like, you know that feeling when you're just full of hope and that anything seems possible and your energy just seems like boundless? Hopefully that's what you feel like after listening to this pod. But that's when you're experiencing like the world-expanding power of positive emotions. So joy is a great example, like feeling joyful, that makes us want to play and that makes us more creative and that helps us find solutions that we would usually have missed. So in the long run, like positive emotions like joy can, it can even change our personality, like it can open up our character, it can make us more tolerant of other people. And like I say, you don't have to be like 100% positive. I'd say like it probably comes down about 75% positive. If you can keep 75% of your life positive, you'll be able to manifest your dreams. You'll be able to have this, this huge life that you're so grateful for, that you have all this positive like emotion for. I believe that you just need the right ratio between positive and negative emotion. So if the ratio of good to bad feelings is too low, for example, just one good feeling for every bad one, shall we say, we'll end up in a downward spiral. And every day we feel a bit worse, a bit unhappier, until we sit in that depression. Okay, the only way out of this is to counteract it. So we increase our positivity ratio, or the number of positive emotions that we feel for every bad one. And don't get me wrong, like, in reality, most of us are far away from the positive ratio. I think probably most people would have, you know, 2 parts negative to 1 part positive and just be totally dissatisfied with their life, whilst people living with depression might have, you know, equal parts of positive and negative emotions. But reaching that positivity ratio is an attainable goal, okay? It's attainable for all of us. So if you experience more sadness or anger or hatred than joy, don't worry, you are like most people. Most people feel that way. Trust me, when I worked in the NHS, I felt sadness, anger, and hatred pretty every day towards my colleagues, towards patients, towards staff, towards everything and everyone, because I was generally unhappy with who I was as a person. But don't give up. You can learn to have a positive attitude. It might take some work, but even by listening to this podcast, you are taking those steps towards having a more positive attitude in your life. And, you know, some will probably object and say, you know, you learn this genetically. And you learn this from your parents, or you pick this up from your friends. And that is true. Like I've mentioned before, you are the kind of accumulation of the 5 people that you are surrounded with. And I've said this before, and I'll say it time and time again. So if you are surrounded by 5 people that are really, really negative, and they really couldn't give a shit about life, and, you know, they're sat moping around, and they've set up a WhatsApp group and invited you to it, and all they do is bitch about other people, or they drag you down, or they talk about what people are wearing, you're going to be sucked into that, and that's going to bring your vibe down. So you're not basically going to be able to build your resilience to gratitude and positive attitudes towards life if you are being constantly dragged down and you are constantly in a cycle. So surround yourself with positive people, okay? Having a resilient personality is valuable because when you face obstacles with optimism, like you might even like lose a loved one in your lifetime, for example. That drastically increases your depression, your anxiety, you know what I mean? You are going to feel feelings of sadness because of that like event. So by having that positive attitude inside, you're able to bounce back from that quicker. I'm not saying it won't be as hard, but I'm saying you'll be so resilient that you will bounce back quicker. You won't sit in that depressive state for as long. Does that kind of make sense? I hope it does. So it doesn't mean that you're completely getting rid of your negative emotions, because, you know, feelings like fear or anger, they're useful in certain situations. Like if you faced a dangerous animal, can you imagine if you like walked up to a bear and just started stroking it and it bit your hand off? Yeah, you, you've got to have that fear, you've got to have that anger to drive you, and that's what would get you away keep you alive in that situation. The challenge for you is to find the techniques that work for you as an individual. And I'll say this time and time again, it's what works best for you, okay? Find activities that are the most rewarding to you. What makes you feel good? What makes you feel happy? What sparks that joy, that playfulness within you? Is it going to the park with your, your dog? Is it taking your family for a day out to the beach? Is it, you know, songwriting? Is it playing the piano? Is it singing? Is it performing on a stage? Is it coming to see Francesca Amber and Mart Tweedy's one-night show in London? Whatever it is that makes you feel good about yourself, that is what's going to give you a positive attitude and fill up your cup, okay? So the challenge is to find a technique that works for you as an individual. So find something that is really, really rewarding to you. Make them into habits if you want, and you will start an upward spiral of growth and happiness, okay? Even this week, for example, in the Manifest with Mart app, we are doing 7 days of journaling, okay? Because the simplest, most effective way to increase your positive feelings is to write them down. Like, just try it. Like, write down how your feelings change over the course of the day. I, I'll literally task that to all of you. How did you feel when you woke up? How did you feel after you put on your clothes? How did you feel after breakfast? And so on. Okay, so just observe how you're feeling because your emotion ratio to observe yourself will go up and down throughout the day. So find out what makes you feel good. Try and cultivate those behaviors and try and run with them on a day-to-day basis. Because when you journal in this way, you can keep track of all the situations that you encounter, which feelings that they triggered, and then once you've got an overview of how often you experience those positive or those negative emotions, which situations trigger which emotions, you can easily increase your positivity ratio because you can think to yourself, okay, I'm gonna do more of what made me feel good tomorrow. So if today you had 3 things that made you feel good and 3 things that made you feel shit, Can you avoid those 3 things that made you feel shit? Was it that, you know, um, you had to go to— you had to go somewhere with someone that you don't like? Can you cut that out of your life tomorrow? That will make you feel just like that little percentage more grateful for your day because you'll have that positive attitude from the other positives that you've experienced but not have to deal with being around this other person. Okay, gratitude is such a positive powerful emotion. Okay, so if you experience it frequently, even in small doses, it leads to a continuous improvement in your general attitude towards life. And we know this, like I've spoke about this before. When my granddad died, I felt like I had nothing. I was at rock bottom for 4 or 5 months, just lying in the bath, not being able to do anything. And it wasn't until I found crystals and I started doing gratitude lists that I started feeling better about myself. And that was like a continuous improvement in my general attitude. So the role of journaling is to find out which situations repeatedly make you feel grateful so that you can trigger more gratitude by recreating those situations more often. So I know last week we spoke about mindfulness, and mindfulness lets you consciously change your everyday feelings, and it's just consciously perceiving and enjoying every single moment of your life by willfully focusing on the positive aspects of everything that you experience. For example, you might be on your to work. You can let your mind wander while you're on the bus, not so much when you're driving, and you can let your mind wander to your troubles. For example, you can think, oh my God, I've got this huge meeting coming up today. Oh my God, I've got so much work to do. Oh my God, then I've got to pick the kids up, then I've got to cook tea. Or you can focus on and savor, you know, the singing birds that you can hear through the window, or the spring flowers that you've just drove by, or the children playing in the park. What would you rather focus on? Would you rather go to that place of negativity, or would you rather see the positives and think, oh my God, what a glorious day? Because it is in our natural— it's in our natural instinct to go straight to the negative. Trust me, I know this, I've been there myself. Or during a meal that you would usually, you know, mindlessly just gulp down food, you could maybe focus on tasting the flavors, tasting those that food that's in your mouth, you know, feeling the textures on your tongue. And it's so weird, like, people think that mindfulness is a bit hippie and stuff like that, but it doesn't just apply to positive emotions. It also means that you're aware of all your negative feelings that you experience, so you can, like, rationally examine or question them. So say, for example, and you've had a negative experience at work and it's on your mind, it's playing on your mind, and you can't get anything done. It might be, you know, your boss has said something to you nasty or something like that. Don't keep thinking it over, okay? Instead, maybe spend the time redirecting your attention. Go for a walk, um, even if it's just around your building. Go for a little break. Do a little 5-minute breathing exercise. Put your headphones on, listen to something upbeat, something that'll get you out of that mood. Listen to a podcast, something useful like, I don't know, reading through unanswered emails, something like that. Another strategy is to reevaluate the negative and just try to find something good about it. So maybe your boss's temper is a challenge for you to overcome. So instead of feeling bad, what can you learn from that situation? Try spinning it in a different way. Okay, but meditation and mindfulness really, really helps you to stick in the present moment, help you stick with that positive mental attitude. And even if you're just doing 5 minutes a day, it's an easy way to increase your happiness. So I've gone on for way longer than I thought this episode would go on for, so I do apologize. And, um, I hope that you found this episode useful. Just before I go, I do need to quickly, um, tell you about my new summer collection, which is available at cannycrystals.co.uk. You will see it on the carousel on the home page. All you need to do is click View Summer Collection, and if you use code SUMMER15, which is the word summer followed by the numbers 1-5, at checkout you will get 15% off everything in this collection. And there are some amazing, stunning pieces. They're hand selected by myself, so go and check that out, go and have a look. If you don't already follow me, go on to Instagram, type in Akanni Crystals, you will see me. Um, I have something like 13.4 thousand followers. Make sure it's the right one. I know there are a few scam pages going around. I do apologize about that. We're trying to work with Instagram to get them taken down ASAP. Or you can follow me on Instagram @marttweedey, which I now have a blue tick. We're— hey! Um, so yeah, go and follow me on Instagram. You can also follow me on TikTok, not that I barely use it at the minute. It's @canny_crystals on TikTok as well. But yes, while you're on my Instagram, click the link in my bio. You will see, um, my links come up. Please, please, please come to our one-night event. Please, please, please, you won't regret it. It's going to be like a huge podcast party between myself and Francesca Amber. If you haven't already, go back and listen to the episodes where Fran was on this podcast, or you can go and listen to Law of Attraction Changed My Life when Fran interviewed me about all things crystals. But yes, I will see you all next Friday. Please don't forget to rate, review, subscribe wherever you listen to your podcast from, and I will see you all next Friday for another episode of Connie Crystals the Podcast. Thanks very much for listening, guys. Bye!

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