153: Rewire your mind for success

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Hello everyone, and thanks so much for joining me once again for another episode of Cani Crystals, the podcast. As you probably know by now, my name is Mart Tweedy. I am your host, and this week actually marked 3 years of this very podcast. Can you believe 3 whole years? If you've been here since the very start, thank you. Thank you so much for being here still today. We've been on quite the journey together, haven't we? If I'm totally honest with you, we've been on a bloody journey. If you are new here, welcome in. Please feel free to share this episode on your stories on Instagram or Facebook, you know, just tagging @canny_crystals. This really does help the pod grow. Right, let's get started anyway. So I've been so snowed under with work, family life, and everything else that I've got going on this last week that I just had to take a moment to breathe. And I'll be honest with you here, 153 episodes in, I have been struggling to think about what to talk about. I was even speaking to Francesca Amber earlier this week and she'd said, congratulations on 3 years. And I was like, yeah, it's, it's quite an achievement. However, I'm bloody running out of things to talk about. And she even said herself that she struggles from time to time of thinking about like something to talk about. So it made me feel a bit more at ease. So I opened me emails on Tuesday morning just for a little bit of inspiration more than anything else. And I had a query from someone who I'll refer to as Rebecca, but she sent a very detailed email because she's going through a messy patch with her husband. And she was asking basically how to rewire your mind for success because her husband keeps on pulling her vibe down. So I thought, great. Let's do an episode on this because isn't that what most of us want in life? Like, you're here listening to me ramble on because you know that if you want a different life, you need to make some changes. There's only you that can make those changes. So the secret to achieving success in any area of your life, it just comes down to changing your mindset. You know, reprogramming your mind to create that life that you desire. So your thoughts, your habits, your beliefs, they are the driving forces behind your actions. And let me repeat this: your thoughts, your habits, and your beliefs drive every single action in your life, okay? And your actions are what shape your life. They also shape your outcomes and your success, or on the flip side, the lack of it as well. So when we understand the psychology behind this and the science of how we can reprogram our minds, you can take charge of your life so that your future isn't just a repeat of your past. Like, who wants to go on doing the same thing day in, day out? Yeah, you're not here because you want the same old future. You want things to be different, and that's why you're listening to me right now. You want that change, you want that success, and for things to actually change, you need to change. The biggest part of that change is reprogramming your mind. Now, I know that reprogramming, that word, it can sound a little bit strange, like you're a computer or something, But as we go through this episode, you'll start to see the very real ways that you can actually reprogram yourself. So we're going to dive into the science and psychology of how to change your mind and even reshape the structure of your brain by taking very specific steps. So let's get straight into it. But before we discuss how to change your mind, I think that it's crucial to first understand how your mind works. So before we dive into how to reprogram your mind, let's get clear on what exactly we are trying to reprogram. And to do that, we need to understand how the mind itself works. So the mind is made up of two main parts. You might have heard of this before. We have the conscious mind and the subconscious mind. Some people also talk about a superconscious mind as well, which is like your connection to God or the universe or source, your higher self, whatever you want to call it. But we're not going to focus on that today. We are just going to talk specifically about the conscious and the subconscious minds, just to keep it nice and simple for you all. So the conscious mind is what you would use for everyday thoughts and decision-making and actions. It's basically what you're aware of right now as you listen to this podcast. Meanwhile, we also have the subconscious mind, and that's where all your memories, your habits, your limiting beliefs, all of that shit is stored. Okay, I say shit, it's not all shit, it's not all doom and gloom. It's also the part of your mind that brings up automatic thoughts without you even realizing it though. Okay, so let's break these down a bit more so that you can fully understand them. So the conscious mind, that's known as your thinking mind. So as you're listening to me right now with this verbal diarrhea and you're wondering, what's the difference between the conscious and the subconscious mind? That is your conscious mind at work. It's the part where you process most of your information and make your decisions from. But here's something surprising, that only accounts for about 5% of your actual activities. Now 5%, you might be thinking like, "What?

Only 5%?

But I'm aware of all of me thoughts and everything that I focus on during the day." But this is exactly why we often struggle when we try to change our habits. We think that we can do it just by changing our conscious mind, but like I say, that's only 5% of what's going on up there in the old noggin. The real magic happens when we work with the subconscious mind, and that's what controls the other 95%. And this is why I bang on about subliminals and things like that. Because subliminals really get into the subconscious mind and they work on that 95%. Just working on that 5% alone isn't going to be enough to tip the scales. So I want you to think about a time when you sat down to set some goals, wherever it was, okay? So you'll have wrote them down, you'll have got super excited about all the possibilities in life, and that excitement that you felt, that is your conscious mind at work. It's the part of you that gets pumped up and thinks, you know, "Yes, I can do this!" But then there's another voice in the back of your mind whispering things like, "That's not possible," "This is going to be hard," or "You'll have to change a lot." Those doubts, fears, and limiting beliefs all come from your subconscious mind, and that often holds us back from making those real changes in our lives. I remember reading a book back in 2019 that gave a great way to visualize the difference in power between your conscious and your subconscious mind. So imagine you could hold your conscious mind in your hand So it would be about the size of a golf ball, yeah? If you could hold it in your hand and clasp your fingers around it, it's going to be the size of a golf ball. Now I want you to imagine holding your subconscious mind, which is the other 95%. It would be the size of a basketball in comparison, okay? So which one do you think has more power, the golf ball or the basketball? Of course it's going to be the basketball, right? That's how much more influence your subconscious mind has over you than you actually realize. Our conscious mind is the part that's constantly thinking things like, "I need to use the bathroom," "I should really call me mum back," or "I need to do this task right now." But it can only handle so much at once, and that's why it only makes up about 5% of our mental activity. So if you want real lasting change, you've got to dive deeper into the subconscious mind, the other 95%. So have you ever seen that picture of the iceberg? Where it shows you what's above the water and what's actually below the water. That's pretty much the same principle here. The conscious mind is going to be the tip of the iceberg, that bit above the water that we can see from a boat, but the subconscious is the bit below the water that goes on for hundreds and hundreds of meters below the surface. So the subconscious mind is responsible for most of our mental activities, and it operates totally automatically. It stores all your limiting beliefs, all your habits, all your memories, and most importantly, It regulates your emotions and handles most of your daily tasks. That's why real change happens when you focus on reprogramming this powerful part of your mind. So our subconscious mind has such a huge impact on our lives that if we want that real lasting change, we need to focus on reprogramming that part of our brain. So we're going to dive into some techniques for how to reprogram the subconscious mind, because your conscious mind wants you to do better. It wants a different life. It wants to be successful. It wants to be a great parent, maybe even make a million pound. So why the hell aren't we doing it? It's like that huge battle between David and Goliath. Your conscious mind is like David, small but determined, and your subconscious mind is this huge Goliath saying, "You've gotta change me first." That's why focusing on the subconscious is so crucial. So to understand this, consider that there are million bits of information being processed in your brain every second, and most of that is happening below your conscious thoughts. That's where the subconscious comes in. Your subconscious mind is kind of like on autopilot. It reacts to situations, people, or even smells without you even consciously thinking about them. And we've all experienced this before. So maybe you're in a certain place and it starts getting dark and you hear a sound. Suddenly your brain would react and it'll trigger this sense of danger, and your body immediately goes into fight or flight mode, and you think you're being followed or something like that. That wasn't a conscious thought, like, "Oh, there might be danger behind me." It was an instant, like an automated response from your subconscious mind. The point I'm trying to make here is that these subconscious reactions and patterns are deeply ingrained in ourselves. If you want to make those real changes in your life, you've got to work on reprogramming that powerful part of your mind. It's like kind of changing the operating system that runs most of your day-to-day life. So think about this. If just the sound of something can trigger an automated response, imagine how often this is happening all day long with lots of different triggers, both positive and negative. Doesn't have to be just sounds. It could be colors, it could be smells, it could be a person. Like, for example, have you ever met someone and straight away just thought, I don't know why, but I just don't vibe with this person? Something feels off. I say this to my friend Josie all the time. I'm like, "Mm, there's something weird about that person." 9 times out of 10, there is something weird about that person. I specifically remember a few years ago, we went to Spain to Johnny's mam's wedding. She'd just moved over there to live out there permanently, and it was the first time that we were going to this village. And when we got there, this really eccentric older woman kind of came up to us and introduced herself. And I just got these vibes, and I don't know what it was about her because she didn't say anything nastily, she didn't look at us nastily or anything like that. She was actually really pleasant to our faces, and for some reason I said to Johnny, she's trouble. And I just couldn't put my finger on what it was that I knew about her, but it was almost like I could just sense that she was, I don't know, a bit of drama or something like that. Anyway, about a year later, she caused so much drama for Johnny's mom that they ended up not wasn't speaking anymore. And I think she even moved back to the UK— not Johnny's mom, this other woman— she moved back to the UK and stuff because everyone in the village kind of turned against her from all this drama that she was creating. And I was like, I felt that the very first time that I met her. So like I say, it might not be anything that that person did. It could be that they just remind you of someone else, and your subconscious is then automatically reacting because it remembers a past experience with that other person. So your conscious mind usually catches up to this realization later. So we're going to break this down further, okay? The subconscious mind processes millions of bits of information a second. Millions of bits a second. So to show you what I mean, let's try this. Focus on your right thumb right now. Were you thinking about your right thumb before I mentioned it? Probably not. But does that mean that there was no input from your right thumb? Did that mean that before you even thought about your right thumb that it wasn't even there and that you just had 4 fingers? Of course not. Your subconscious mind was aware of the sensations from your thumb the whole time. It's just that your conscious mind was just too busy paying attention to other things like listening to me, focusing on the road while driving, concentrating on lifting weights at the gym, or wherever it is that you are right now. Your brain is constantly processing all this input, but it's filtering out what's not immediately relevant to your conscious focus. So another example, if I say, "Focus on how your bum feels in the chair right now," suddenly you're made aware of it and you might be like, "Oh, actually I'm a bit uncomfortable," like I am right now perched on the end of this bed. Or if I said to you, "Notice how your t-shirt feels against your skin," suddenly you can feel it across your shoulders and down your back and across your tummy. Or I could say, "Pay attention to the warmth of the sun on your skin if you're outside." Your brain is always taking in all of this information, but the question is, are you consciously paying attention to it? Most of the time we're not, and that's okay. So what we need to dive into now is how to train our brains to filter out what we don't want, like fears or limiting beliefs, and focus on what we do want to pay attention to. And this all comes down to a concept called neuroplasticity. If you've been listening to this podcast for a while, you've probably heard me mention neuroplasticity many times. And even in my book, which is coming out in January, I've got a whole chapter about this, okay? But if this is your first episode, let me break it down for you. Neuroplasticity is basically a fancy term for a simple idea, because neuroscience has proven that our brains aren't actually hardwired and fixed. They can change and adapt to new circumstances as they happen. So I want you to think of your brain like a bit of plastic. It's going to be flexible, it can be molded, it can be melted down, and like turned into something else. This means that our brains can form new connections and reorganize existing ones. Okay, that's fascinating to me. And that ability allows us to learn new skills, to change our habits, recover from brain injury, whatever it is. So if we can change our brains through neuroplasticity, through the reprogramming techniques that I'm going to share with you, then can we rewire our brains for success? Absolutely we can. It all comes down to being very clear about which thoughts, behaviors, and habits need to change for us to transform ourselves and ultimately our lives. So consistency is key because repetition is a skill. By being persistent and consistent with what I'm about to tell you, practicing these techniques over and over again, your brain will eventually start to adopt them as your new normal. So let's dive into a couple of techniques for reprogramming your mind and I'm gonna say that you're gonna know all this anyway. You will know all of this anyway, but you need to hear this, okay? The first technique is called cognitive restructuring. So this method is widely used in cognitive behavioral therapy, which is also known as CBT, and it involves identifying and replacing irrational or negative thoughts with the thoughts that you want to have. I read that off Google. So here's how it works. Just like your subconscious mind might throw a thought at you that your conscious mind eventually catches up to, you need to recognize these thoughts as they arise. So when your conscious mind realizes like, hey, I don't like that thought, you then actively replace it with a more positive or constructive thought. And this process helps you become aware of how your thoughts and thought patterns actually impact your emotions and your behaviors. So cognitive restructuring just gives you the tools to challenge and change the negative patterns that aren't serving you. And that's going to allow you to create new, healthier patterns in their place. So it's all about taking control of your thoughts, reshaping them to align with the life that you want to create. There have been so many studies that show how cognitive restructuring works, especially in treating various psychological disorders as well. So when I was doing some research for this episode, I found that, you know, there was research out there that had demonstrated its effectiveness in helping people manage depression, anxiety, OCD, you know. And if cognitive restructuring can be used to treat such serious conditions, just imagine what it can do for changing our everyday negative thoughts and beliefs. It's got to work. By using cognitive restructuring as well, we can take those negative belief patterns or fears and just transform them into something completely different. So when you practice this consistently, you can then reprogram your mind to think more positively. And then what will happen is you'll start to believe that what you want is actually possible, rather than being overly cynical or doubting yourself, you know, with that imposter syndrome. We all suffer from that. That shift is going to allow you to stop being so hard on yourself and start speaking to yourself in a more encouraging way. So when you begin to change your thoughts, replacing the ones that hold you back with thoughts that empower you, you know, you're going to develop a stronger sense of self-belief. And with that self-belief, success becomes much more attainable. So one thing I heard someone on a podcast recently say is that you can't control your first thought, but you can always work on your second thought. So your first thought usually comes automatically from your subconscious, just like I've mentioned there. It just pops up, your body reacts. But the second thought that you have is where you have the power. So it requires a conscious choice from you. Let's say you've just started a business and it's going pretty well, but as things start to pick up, you might feel a little bit uncomfortable because you're not used to doing well. You might think, yeah, you know, I want to grow me business to this amount per month, but then a thought will creep in and be like, yeah, but it's going to be really fucking hard because you always mess things up. So you might start to feel down on yourself, and this is often a subconscious thought that's rooted in past experiences. Experiences. So when that thought pops up, like, "I screw everything up," I want you to notice it. I want you to take a step back as if you were another person observing that thought and just ask yourself, is this thought going to support me and grow my business to £50K a month? The answer is probably no. If you're thinking, "I screw everything up," that's not going to help you reach your goals, okay? So what you need to do is you need to replace that thought with 3 solid pieces of evidence to prove that you're not a failure. So don't just say, "Hey, don't worry, you're awesome, you know, we'll be fine," because that will just usually trigger your bullshit meter and you won't believe it. So instead, I want you to find 3 real examples that show you're not a failure when a thought like that pops up. For instance, you could say, "I successfully launched my first product and I received positive feedback from customers," because that example shows that you're capable of starting something new and achieving positive results. Or you could say, I've built a strong network of supportive friends and colleagues who trust and value everything they have to say. That is going to highlight your ability to build meaningful relationships, and it shows that others see value in what you have to offer. Or you could say something like, I managed a challenging project at work that required a lot of problem solving and leadership, and I completed it successfully, because that proves your capability to handle those difficult situations. And to lead other people and to see a project through to completion. So those examples, they provide that concrete evidence to challenge that negative self-talk, and then you're going to be able to reinforce a more positive, empowered mindset. That's what cognitive restructuring looks like. You just identify your negative thought patterns and you just replace them with 3 thoughts that are backed by real evidence, and that will help to reprogram your mind to think more positively and effectively. So let's think of it this way. If you want a beautiful garden, you've got to put in some work, yeah? Because there's always going to be weeds that will pop up in any garden at any point. You'll just need to pull them out and plant the seeds that you want. It happens in my garden all the time. We had our garden done out 3 or 4 years ago, and it was, it was a shit tip when we first moved in. It was a shit tip. All I'm going to say is never buy a house with Barretts. They paved pretty much all of it, but they paved on top of weeds, on top of just, oh, this awful, like, it wasn't even soil, it was just like rubble and everything like that. So every now and again, like, a paving slab would come loose, and when you looked underneath, it was just like loads of rubble and waste and stuff like that. It was horrible. So we had the garden done out, and we got this fake grass put down, um, just because it's easier to maintain and because we have nowhere to store, you know, like a grass cutter or anything like that. And even though we had, you know, it professionally done, every now and again weeds will still come up through the fake grass. I've still got to pull them bloody weeds out all the time. I'm still going around with me little spray gun all the time. We need to put in that effort, okay? That's what it comes down to. Pull the weeds, plant the seeds. This isn't a one-time job. It's something that you'll need to do consistently for a long time to keep that garden thriving. So we're going to talk about the second technique now, which is visualization. Let's be real, visualization might sound a little bit corny to some of you, as you know, closing your eyes, imagining what it would feel like to achieve your goals. I bang on about it all the time, but it can sound really, really like, like woo-woo and weird. I know it does. But here's the thing, it actually works. Visualization is such a powerful tool for reprogramming your subconscious mind. When you close your eyes and you vividly imagine whatever you want in life, especially early in the morning, it can be incredibly effective. And that's because your subconscious mind is most active right after you wake up. It's like the remnants of your dreaming state are still lingering. So if you practice visualization within 15 minutes of waking up, you're going to be tapping into that 95% of your thoughts and feelings that are controlled by the subconscious. So that's a simple yet powerful way to start shaping your reality today. So visualization, for anyone new here, it just involves creating mental images of the outcomes, the goals, the situations, anything that you want in life. And the successful key to effective visualization is firstly knowing exactly what you want so that you can visualize it clearly. One of my favorite examples of me visualization was probably back when I was on This Morning, and the only thing that I wanted in life at the time was to go on and to meet Alison Hammond. That was back in 2019 when Alison wasn't even one of the presenters yet. And on the week leading up to me going on, all I was thinking about was a laugh, what it would be like to hug her, you know, to be able to sit in her dressing room and chat with her. And so I would visualize whenever possible that she was sat having a candid chat with us, and I could hear her laugh, I could smell her perfume, I could see her smile lighting up the room. And guess who came in on her day off when she wasn't even supposed to be there when I was in the studio. We had so much fun together. She was everything I visualized and more. She even gave us her phone number and texted us afterwards. Like, that was just wild. Totally different story, and I won't digress here, but I was even on one of her Instagram Lives during the pandemic as well. All that came from visualization. Now you can do the same. So visualize the house you want. Visualize that beach holiday you want. Visualise travelling the world with your kids and exploring life, because when we visualise achieving our goals, we're just essentially brainwashing ourselves to believe that success is possible, and that boosts our motivation and commitment to achieving that goal. Often we don't fully believe that we can achieve what we want, so visualisation just helps to change that mindset. Now, studies back this up as well, and this isn't just me chatting shit. When I was looking at research earlier, There's a research published in, oh, what is it called? The Journal of Applied Sports Psychology. I want to say that. And they found that athletes, specifically golfers for some reason, golfers that practice visualization techniques saw huge improvements in their performance. So they had these golfers visualize making every putt for 15 to 20 minutes before playing. And those people who visualized successfully making their putts, they experienced the greatest improvement in their putting performance. I think that is amazing that visualization can actually do something like that. If you haven't already, give it a try. Now, I often get messages from people saying, "I've closed my eyes, I really, really struggle to visualize." And someone actually said this to me in my members group not long ago, and what I said to them is, try and close your eyes and imagine yourself stood in your very own kitchen, somewhere that is unique to you but somewhere that you know like the back of your hand. We all know our kitchens and how they're laid out and what they look like, yeah? So visualize yourself being stood in your kitchen. Visualize yourself going to cook yourself a meal. So you open your fridge, you pull something out of your fridge, you walk over to the cooker, you pull out pan, you put a pan on the top, you shove whatever it is that you've got out the fridge into the pan, you turn the hob on, you reach out, you get a plate, you go and get a glass of water. Yeah, you get me? That is visualisation. You have just visualised walking around your kitchen. So if people struggle to visualise something new, what I say is visualise that one object in your kitchen at a time has changed. So your fridge might have changed from white to black. Your oven top might have changed from black to silver. Yeah, your benches might have gone from cream to to dark brown. Whatever it is, just visualize one little small change at a time, and that will help you to get into the mindset of being able to create whatever you want in your mind. And then the last technique that I want to talk about is another simple one as well, but it's so, so fucking powerful. It's affirmations. Honestly, trust me when I say this, that affirmations are so, so powerful for reshaping your subconscious beliefs because they're just positive statements that you repeat to yourself over and over again And I always suggest, you know, having 1 or 2 specific affirmations about yourself and what you're creating in your life, because the key is to habit stack them. So attach them to an existing habit. For example, after brushing your teeth in the morning and evening, immediately do your affirmations. Repeat them 10, 15, 20 times. Yeah, so as soon as you brush your teeth in the morning, look yourself right in the eyeballs in that mirror and say, I am a success. Something along those lines, okay? Repeat it 10, 15, 20 times, however many you want, but stack it with another habit that we already do. Every time that you're waiting for a kettle to boil, repeat your affirmations. Every time you go to the toilet, repeat your affirmations. Stack it onto something else that you do on a daily basis, and it will help you to remember to say it, okay? Research has consistently shown that affirmations can significantly impact your mental state and they can also contribute to a more positive outlook on life as well. So that's how you can start brainwashing yourself to be more positive. It's really quite simple when you think about it, you know, techniques like cognitive restructuring, visualisation, affirmations. They are just tools for you to brainwash yourself. Not me, not the news, not your parents, not anyone else. You are in control. We've all been brainwashed by everything that's happened to us in life. Whether that's from our environment, our upbringing, our friends, our family, the media. But now you have the power to step in the driver's seat. You have the power to take control of that process, and only you get to decide what thoughts and beliefs that you want to plant in your mind going forward. And that is how you reprogram your mind for success— by consistently using cognitive restructuring, visualization, and affirmations. These 3 tools will help you to reshape your mindset and create the life that you want. Okay, so I hope that this episode has really helped you. I hope that even though I speak about visualization and affirmations all the time, that this is still giving you some food for thought to actually go ahead and give them a try for yourself this weekend. And if you've enjoyed this episode, please come to our incredible event next year. It's called Manifest. It's going to be held right here in Newcastle upon Tyne on June 16th, 2025. So we are around— what, we're around 8 or 9 months away now. The tickets and the lineup are available right now at the website, which is in the show notes for today's episode, or you can visit mani-fest.uk. That's the word manifest, by the way, split up with a dash or a hyphen in the middle. So mani, M-A-N-I, dash, F-E-S-T, dot UK. I had someone last week saying I don't know how to spell Manny Dash Fest. And I said, no, it's Manny Dash Fest. Anyway, right, with that, I'm off to enjoy the rest of this sunshine. It feels like we're having a little Indian summer right now in Newcastle. It's 22 degrees in the middle of September. I'm here for it, I'm loving it. I hope that you all have a lovely weekend anyway, and I'll see you all again next Friday for another episode. Speak soon, guys.

Bye!

You wanna get your backyard summer ready, but you don't wanna break the bank? Wayfair gets it. Planning on dining alfresco or relaxing poolside? Wayfair has everything you need to prep your space. Shop now and save up to 70% off during Wayfair's Fourth of July clearance. Score huge deals on outdoor furniture, area rugs, and more. We're talking thousands of products for every style and budget. Plus surprise flash deals July 6th. Don't wait. Shop Wayfair's Fourth of July clearance now through July 6th at wayfair.com.

Wayfair, every style, every home.