213: The calm and happy home, ft. Kimberley Gallagher

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Hello everyone, welcome back to Canny Crystals, the podcast. Now today's guest is someone who truly needs no introduction because you all absolutely adore her, and honestly, so do I. This is her third time on the podcast and I think that kind of says it all. So joining me today is the incredible Kimberly Gallagher. She's a feng shui expert, interior energy alchemist, and now the author of her brand new book, The Calm and Happy Home. So if you've ever walked into a space and you've instantly felt at ease or on the flip side, you've walked into a room that just didn't feel right, this episode is going to completely change how you see your environment. Kimberly's work blends ancient feng shui wisdom and modern neurodesign principles, showing us that our homes aren't just where we live— they are living, breathing reflections of our energy. In The Calm and Happy Home, she teaches us how to use simple, affordable tweaks to create spaces that nurture calm, balance, and abundance in every part of life. So if you've ever felt stuck, cluttered, or maybe a bit settled in your space, or maybe you're just curious about how your home might be subtly shaping your mood, relationships, even your finances, you're in for a real treat today. So Kimberly, first of all, welcome back to the podcast. How are you?

Thank you.

One introduction—

how do you do that without stumbling, Mart?

Thank you so much for having me back. It is always such a joy and a pleasure to chat with you, so thank you.

You're so welcome. And I mean, this is your third time joining me, and I just feel like every time come on, the listeners absolutely love you. And so I just want to start by saying congratulations on the new book, which came out just a few days ago. For those of you who haven't got their hands on it yet, The Calm and Happy Home, can you share what inspired you to write it and how it builds on your past work in feng shui?

Oh yeah, it's been— I don't like the word journey, but it has been a bit of a journey because when I first started learning about feng shui, I found it difficult to relate to it, and I read a few books, and I just thought I was doomed. I was like, "Ah, well, the way our house is designed, whether I'm sleeping in this position, that position, I don't even know how to use a compass, so I'm just doomed right from the outset." And the more I've practiced Feng Shui, the more clients I've worked with, the more I've learned about how to translate this beautiful ancient practice into modern homes. And I changed my life with Feng Shui, and I truly believe you can change your life by changing the energy in your home. And I want everybody to be able to experience all of that, or at least some of that, for the price of a book. And I don't believe that cost or accessibility should limit your ability to change your life for the better. And that's what drove me to really write the best book that I possibly could.

I was going to say, because you mentioned in the book, obviously you don't need a big budget to create that harmony at home. So can you share with us, like, what are some of your favorite low-cost or even completely free changes that people can even make today just to shift the energy of their space?

Of course. So I think the first thing— and it's funny because I'm almost like revisiting this all myself because we moved into our house about 6 weeks ago and I've always, I've been so lucky obviously for the last 5 years that I've lived in homes where I've transformed the energy like right from the beginning. And houses that, our last house here in Australia had a fairly decent energy before we even moved in. And here we moved in and I was like, oh, this is a toffee. Because I loved it. But it's quite steely in its character, and so I had to soften it. And so, I think my first thing is that you need to start building a relationship with your home. And it may sound completely bonkers, but it's like when you meet a friend for the first time, or, you know, you're building a relationship with a partner for the first time, you've got to get to know each other. And I think, you know, literally I put my hand on the wall and my husband was like, "Oh no, here she goes." And I was like, "We were looking at the plant." And I was like, "It's okay. We're here to stay. We're not going to leave you. And I know you've been through quite a bit," because there was quite a few different people living here, "but I'm here to love you and we're going to, it's all going to be okay." And I think that's the first thing is to Say hi to your home, introduce yourself to your home. And the amount of people that say that they do that and they get so emotional because your home has literally held you through so much. Even if you've just moved in, it's held you through that moving period, whether you're renting or whether you're buying, because let's face it, it's blinking stressful. And you may have had kids there, you may have met your partner there, moved in there together, may have had breakups in that home. But it's still standing and it knows you better than anybody or anything else. So, saying hi, introducing yourself to the home, and starting a fresh relationship with it. Because when we purchase a house, when we rent a house, you know, it's the most expensive decision that we ever make. And we make that decision based upon a feeling. And you said that in the introduction, like you get that feeling for a home. And most of the time you purchase your house because you get a feeling that it's lovely. And then when you move in, all of a sudden the home just comes a bit transactional. Like the kitchen is where you cook and the living room is where you relax or work or where the kids play. And the bedroom is where you sleep. And you forget that there's this feeling in your home. So, that's really my first thing because that's start, that's, you know, Feng Shui 1.0, like that is where you are going to start. And then think about areas of your life that have maybe thrived since you've been living there, or maybe areas that have struggled since you've been living there. And really start to almost like go through therapy with your house. Like when you go and see a therapist and they're like, okay, tell me about what's been going on. And you go through and like, well, this bit's great, but, this bit's not so great. And so, go through with your house, what are you helping me with? And what are we struggling with? Because your house is a true reflection of your life. And you divide the home into 9 different areas, and each of these areas looks after an area of your life. And I go through this in my book, and I go through the mapping process in the book as well. So, even if you've got a wonky-shaped floor plan or an L-shaped home, it will give you an idea as to how to do that. And then you can go, okay, let's find this area and see how it's going to support me. And I think wealth is always a, you know, a top spot.

It's the first thing that everyone asks for, isn't it? Straight away.

Yeah. And do you know, wealth means so much to many different people. And I, there is a financial underla— like, level in there that obviously needs to be satisfied and melt— and met, sorry. But wealth can also mean going on holiday, which also means having the money as well. Or it may be spending time with your family, and obviously that needs you to have the finances to be able to take time off and not work 7 days a week or 2 jobs and all of those things. So the Southeast looks after your wealth and There's 120 different schools of Feng Shui. So many schools of Feng Shui. It's so confusing. What's even more confusing is when you go back into ancient times, it's 4,000 years old, and you used to have these masters teaching their, their apprentices, and they would tell one apprentice the truth and they would tell one apprentice lies, but nobody knew who had the truth and who had the false information. So therefore, you can imagine over thousands of years, that's why it's all sort of like mishmash together, and we're only just coming back together now and going, well, that doesn't work, but this does work. So I practice Flying Stars Feng Shui, which I had no idea was the most complex and most advanced form of Feng Shui.

There we go.

And we therefore do use the compass. Some schools of Feng Shui just go, oh, the far left corner of your home, that looks after your wealth, which is fine and it works for some people, but Flying Stars Feng Shui It looks at your home specifically. So, you find that area, and it's not just a corner. Again, people think it's just a corner. If you live in an apartment or a unit or a flat, it's about an arm span. That's probably the area. And if you live in a house, it's probably two arm spans. That's the sort of area around it. And then I want you to relate how your finances are to your home. And what energy is there. So, is your, are your finances going round and round in circles? Like, you earn money, it goes, you earn money, it goes, and that you just can't break that cycle. So, then think, okay, go to the southeast of your home. How's the energy circulating around there? And can it get around? Because if it can't because of the clutter or that there's too much furniture, like it's just overly furnished, or you've got broken items in there, or it's just a bit of a dumping room, the energy gets stuck. And stuck energy is like this big old sponge of just like negativity that just keeps you in that same cycle. So, what can you do in your Southeast area? Clear it, declutter it. Everything, I'm not saying you have to live like in a completely pristine home, I don't, I absolutely don't, but everything has a home and I think that's the important thing. And then place these wealth items in your home in the Southeast. So what does wealth mean to you? Is it a picture of going on holiday? Do you really resonate with your citrine crystal, for example? So then that can go in the southeast of your home. Is it that you like cold hard cash? If you like some cold hard cash, put that in there. And whatever resonates with you. And I know you speak about this a lot, like when you are in this manifestation stage, you've got to believe it. And I think when you are placing items like in the southeast area of your home, I know some people go, oh, I'm just gonna print off one of those checks from the universe. Not one bone in my body resonates with that because I'm like, I haven't seen a checkbook since 1993.

And also like, I just, I don't, oh, you've got one there?

No, I've got an actual £50 note framed and inside it says, thank you for all the money I've been sent in my life. More is always on its way to me. The reason I changed it for a £50 note is that exact reason because it was a cheque, and I just thought, who uses fucking cheques anymore?

I wouldn't know what to do if someone gave me a cheque.

I know, I wouldn't.

That's so— and I'm so glad you've done that. I thought you were gonna go, oh, here's my picture from the universe, and I'm like, okay, thanks for having me, Mart, bye.

So there's that. But then some quick tips around the home. So in Feng Shui, your bathroom, your pipes, everything like that, they're like these suckers of energy. Everything sort of goes down it, which isn't too bad because because we want it to take away the negative energy, but it can also take away your wealth energy as well. So, what we can do is tie red ribbons, which I know sounds mad, and do you know what? Who cares? What's the worst that's gonna happen? Tie a red ribbon around your waste pipe from your sink, and that is known to then allow the negativity to go, but this red is this fire energy, and it sort of keeps that wealth inside of your home, and then the rest can drain down. And, I feel that there's many plumbers around the world wondering what on earth is going on with these red ribbons being tied around everybody's pipes.

Alexa, set a reminder for 5 minutes' time to buy red ribbons, please. Honestly, I've never heard that. I'm honestly going to try that. Why not?

It's so simple. It's so simple. But again, you've got to believe it.

Yeah.

So when you're putting it on, you're like, I am doing this to stop my money draining away. And with that, you want to keep your toilet seat lids down as well. And that's, I know it sounds like a bit of an old wives' tale and you probably heard it from years ago, but it's just a great one that, you know, then it's almost like you're building that trust with your home that it's looking after you and it's looking after your money as well.

Do you know what's funny now that you mentioned the toilet seat? So about 3 months ago, my little boy was playing with our en-suite toilet. He does it all the time when I'm in the shower. He just comes in and he starts slamming the toilet seat. And I'm like, you're gonna break that, you're gonna break that. All of a sudden it shattered into a million pieces, right? So I had no toilet— like, you know, the lid that goes over the top of the seat— no lid whatsoever. And I thought, right, I must get that fixed because otherwise all the abundance is going to go down the toilet. And I didn't get around to fixing that, I'm going to say, for about 3 or 4 weeks, just because of how crazy my schedule is.

Life.

And I was getting so many bills, and it was always a VAT bill for the exact amount of money that I had in my bank account, or a tax bill, or a corporation tax bill, whatever it was. And I was just getting all these bills. The second I fixed that toilet seat, I've had no more bills since.

Honestly, like, it's, it blows my mind still, but the daily things that people message me with that happen because they've done something really simple. Like, my other favourite tip is, The kitchen is also really closely linked to wealth, prosperity, and abundance. And it's believed that this lovely wealth energy is coming into your home through the stove, like so, through your hob. And it's coming up and it's sort of filling your home with this nourishment. That's the sort of ancient philosophy, that it's this nourishment coming into your home, which is wealth. So we need to clean the hob. We need to clean that stove.. But again, doing it with the mindset and those manifestation techniques of welcoming more money into the home. And my favourite affirmation at the moment, especially if you're feeling stuck— I feel that a lot of people are feeling a bit stuck at the minute— is, show me. Just show me how I can make more money. Show me how I can save money. Show me all the fun ways I can make more income into this home. Like, and then you can't, you can't say angrily either. Like, when you just, when you say, show me, it's a bit sarcastic.

Like, go on, show me how I can have the best day ever.

And you sort of, it's this fun energy. So, you're putting this energy in there. You're cleaning the stove. The amount of people who have won amounts on the lottery or had tax rebates, or there was one lady that her council contacted her to say that she was paying like 25% more council tax for the last 12 years., and funnily enough, a cheque was in the post.

Like, but which, I mean, trying to get through to the council in England is hard enough. Yeah.

Let alone the council actually contacting you. So that's another really lovely wealth tip. And I know if you follow Mrs. Hinge, it does go against what she does, because she's always got a lovely little decorative item on top of a stove, but we want that lovely energy to come in. And so that's my other favourite tip. For wealth.

I was going to say, I remember you doing an Instagram Live, I think it was a couple of years ago, about how the amount of burners that you had on a hob top increased the wealth as well. So the more burners that you had on the top of the burner, the, the more wealthy you would be. And just by putting a simple mirror or something behind those rings, you are doubling the amount of rings. Yeah, yeah, it's crazy.

And also, like, use— and it's funny because we've all got the We've all got a favourite burner.

Yeah.

I don't know what it is, but we go to the same one every time. Use them all. See them, each one, as like a different source of income into your home. You'll be cooking up a stir fry using every single pan tonight doing this, but using all those different burners and be like, this is this lovely energy coming in. And then the mirror behind it can mirror that. However, mirrors are this funny thing in Feng Shui because If they mirror something good, then that's great. But if you hate cooking and your kitchen is the most chaotic place in the world, that mirror is going to be doubling up the fact that you hate cooking. Right. And that your kitchen is the most chaotic place in the world. So, even if you just have to pretend that you love cooking over the stove and this is all the money coming in, then that's when it can help you.

Okay, I'm going to ask a quick question as well while we're on the subject of wealth and abundance. So my house, for example, it's very narrow. I mean, very narrow. However, it's very tall and it's very long. Okay, so when you did my, um, my bagua map and things like that, my southeastern corner is right behind my front door. And I mean, there must be about that much. It's not very much at all. It's maybe about 60 centimeters before the wall to the next door's house. Now, in that corner, I've got a wealth bowl filled crystals, um, feng shui prosperity coins. I've got one of those waving cats. I've even got one of those little gold horses with the coins, what you told me to get, charging money into the house. Yeah, yeah. I've got jade, I've got a money plant, I've got every friggin' thing that you can imagine. I've got tingsha symbols, I've got red ribbon, I've got coins tied with a red ribbon. Is that clutter or is that wealth coming in? Is that wealth energy or is that too much? Am I doing too much, basically? Because on the next floor up, that is the landing area, but it's where the stairs kind of curve round, so there's not actually anything above that. And then there's a really high ceiling with nothing there. So that's the only thing that's in that corner, and it's got like a console table filled with loads of plants. But like I say, they are all Wealth and Abundance plants, and I'm like, is that too much now that you've said it? Because I do clean it like every Sunday. I go around with a duster, I refresh it. I've got a little piece of paper with an intention under the wealth ball as well, because I think you'd mentioned that one time, and I just slid that underneath. But it always gets cobwebs, like even in just a week, because we have an awful spider problem. So I'm dusting it like every single week, but I'm just thinking now that you've said all that, like, is that clutter? Do I just need to simplify it down a little bit?

I think you need to simplify it, Mart. And I know why you've done it, because like on the other floors you haven't got anything, the space for it to move around. But if you think from an energetic point of view, that energy needs to flow around and it needs to flow around really beautifully. So, Because you've just said like the cobwebs and things get in there, that, that's the energy getting stuck. Yeah, it's going in and it's not coming out, and it's like a pinball machine just going around all of these things. So what you could do there, and that's what I like about feng shui, because there's always— when I was in England, our first house, like our downstairs toilet was our southeast, and I was like, oh no. And then the bedroom upstairs was like our dumping room, you know, all the bin bags for charity shops and all things like that. I was like, oh, we're doomed. But you can always use another area as like a backup. And so the north area of your home is your career and business.

Yeah.

Which for most people, yes, you can win the lottery, like obviously, but for most people, you'll resonate with that money coming in through your career and business. Some people are like, absolutely not, I'm gonna win a home.

I'm like, good on you. And one of my clients did, and you know, hats off to them. That's amazing.

But I don't resonate with that. I'm like, "Chances of me winning a home are really little." However, I do feel that through my work that this could be where it sort of comes in. So, the north of your home could be like your second wealth area. And so, I would move some of those items to that area.

So, the north area of my home is the downstairs toilet, the middle bathroom, and the en suite. Brilliant.

I'm fucked.

This is why, I think this is why though, when my toilet seat was broke, that my business started getting loads of bills. That's probably why.

Yeah, it would've been, 'cause it's the north of your home.

It's all linked.

So, you need to get your red ribbons. Okay, right, okay, fine. So, you need to get your red ribbons around all of the sinks in those bathrooms. And if you want to, put it around the toilet pipe as well. Make sure that those lids are closed. I would put your crystals. The crystals in the bathroom are fine. The plants in the bathroom are tricky because sometimes they don't thrive so much. But like bamboo is fine in a sort of dark bathroom. So like 3 stalks of bamboo, that works. And also that's quite nice for your trio, for your little gang at home as well. Like 3 of them, like, because we've got 3 in our family. So I quite like that sort of that representation. And then put your money plant in your entrance.

Yes.

So then that's going to get this lovely energy in, it's going to spread it around the house. And also, like, I think it's that, that mindset as well of going, okay, well, this is the situation, but it's fine because I can fix it and it's all going to be okay. And then also in the north area, I would put things in there because you can put, you can put photos in there. I wouldn't put family photos necessarily in the bathroom because again, it's this like way waste energy, but you could still have pictures in the bathroom if you wanted to of your aspirations through your business. So whether that's traveling more, for example— I'm just obsessed with travel. Like, that's from— that for me is why— well, I mean, we live in Australia, but that's why I, you know, I work, because I love to go on holiday and do all these things. Yeah. So for example, if that was the case, you could— I don't know, say you wanted to go to Disney World as a family, you could Put some, you know what, oh, I've just had a great idea. You could get some like little Disney toys for the bath.

Oh yeah, well, we have some.

Yeah, yeah. And then you've got the Disney stuff in there if you think, you know, I mean, Disney might be your like idea of hell, but if that's something that you may, you might want to go to Paris for a romantic getaway instead. So, but like bringing these things in, and I think my biggest message is it doesn't have to look like you've been, your house has been feng shui'd. It doesn't have to look bonkers. I Hats off to you that you've got a lucky cat in your entrance because I just wouldn't have one.

I got it from Thailand a few years ago and it literally sat upstairs in a box and I was like, you know what, I'm going to put a battery in that because they're good for movement of energy, aren't they?

Yes, they are.

It's because I think that's why Chinese takeaways put them like on the counter because it's supposed to like wave in abundance and move the energy around. But something else as well that you mentioned a while ago is to clean the front entrance of your home because that's where all the good energy comes in. So at the side end of my front door, I've got two big long strip windows. And because we still live on a building site, because the estate still isn't done, I can clean those windows and by the end of the day there is like a layer of dust all over the windowsill. And I'm cleaning them constantly because I want that sun to come through, hit off those crystals, spread that abundance. So I'm always cleaning my front door. And I've even just got new winter plants as well because my lilies had just died off. So I've just put winter plants by the front door. So it's like, nice, I look at it. And even because I remember to you one day, my bins are by the front door as well. Yeah, so I even got a bin store just to lock them away, and then that energy is locked away and it's gone.

Could you put like, um, I mean, it depends how loud and proud you want to be to on the estate, but like a suncatcher in the window, even on the entrance.

So like on the internet, I've got everything, Kim, honestly. Because you'd said about getting a chandelier or something so that when the energy comes in, it disperses. See, I'm a good student, honestly.

You are amazing, Mart. You've got more things than I have.

I got a, so I got a little chandelier for my entrance, but then I also put a plant because as soon as you go in, you can see our back door. So there's like a staircase at the side, but there was nothing dispersing that energy. So I put a chandelier above and a big like kind of potted plant in the middle, just before you go to the staircase, just to disperse that energy. But as the sun comes through the window, it catches on the suncatcher and it disperses around as well.

I think you need to clear that energy, that area a little bit.

Yeah, too close, isn't it?

Yeah, let it breathe. And then just open your door. So if you can't, if those windows are getting really dirty, just open your front door a little bit in the morning and just let it in that way. 30 seconds of opening your door in the morning is going to let in more energy than those windows all throughout the day. And also, it'll be your windows at the front of your home as well. So not just your door, like we see your front entrances, like the whole of that side. Yeah. So yes, your opportunities do come in through your front door, but it will be coming in through your front windows as well. So again, just making sure that this energy can, can come in and actually enter your home. And again, with those new opportunities, like you're opening the door, like every time you come into your home, like like, say to yourself, I'm bringing new opportunities in with me, I'm bringing new energy with me. And I think it's just also about being really careful of the energy that you're bringing into your home. And like, I knew somebody that did, um, jewelry service the other week, and she was on my course, and we were speaking about it. And so she literally kept her clothes in the car, so she got changed in the car, like, her shoes were in the car, her clothes were in the car, so then she didn't then bring that energy into her home. So, if you are in a position where you hate your job, which, you know, a lot of people do, make sure you—

I'm not saying you have to get naked in your car before you come in and like completely get changed before you come in, like you do when you're a kid and you're dead muddy.

But just think about when you come in, like put your stuff away. So, rather than leaving like your work bag at the front door or your shoes at the front door, or your coat at the front door, or leaving your work uniform out in your bedroom. Like, put it away, because, yeah, not only is that energy coming in, but mentally you're not escaping either. And you've got to escape. Assume if you've got little kids at school, and if they're not having a great time at school and you leave their school bag— and don't get me wrong, it makes the mornings a lot quicker if you've got the bag and the shoes and the uniform all ready to go the next day— but if they don't enjoy it, then they're never escaping it. So just having little boxes at front door for people to have. Like, there's little pull-out drawers, they're not expensive. Dunelm sell them, and I think IKEA sometimes do them as well. And just put the stuff in there so that energy is then contained, but also mentally you're not being reminded of, oh, I've got to go back to work tomorrow and I hate it.

Yeah.

Speaking of being parents, because many of my listeners are parents, us both included, you dedicate such a beautiful section of your book to children's bedrooms as well. So What are the most common energetic mistakes that parents make in their kids' rooms? Like, how can we, how can we make those spaces more calming and safe for our children?

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Wayfair, every style, every home. Oh, it was so important to me to write about children because let's face it, when they're happy, we're happy. When they sleep, we're happy. So it all comes back to us selfishly.

So that's why this chapter was so important.

And I think it's not a mistake because we don't know we're doing wrong by it. And it's not something that sort of crossed my mind until I was really learning about feng shui. But the bedroom as adults is for rest and romance. And the bed itself, like the bedroom, is meant for sleeping. And for babies, like nursery babies, they have their nursery. And they go in and they sleep and it's really peaceful and we have this lovely calm music and it's really nice and it's really gentle, pastel colours, all of that. Then when they get to a toddler, when their energy increases, for whatever reason, we also increase the energy in their bedroom as well. So, we go from these beautiful neutrals to like bang, all of these colours, their duvet covers like Spider-Man or unicorns or trucks or whatever it is. They've got pictures of their superheroes on the walls., and it then becomes this really energetic room and they play in there. They may have technology in there as they get older. They may have timeout in there as well. And then literally half an hour later, we expect them to go to sleep in there. And it's just this whole, it's almost like, and it sort of makes me laugh, like at nurseries when they try and get the kids to go to sleep in the daytime, like, and they have this like blackened corner, like in the corner of the building. To take the energy away because it's almost like trying to get a child to sleep in the middle of a nursery room, but just with the lights off, like in their bedroom.

Yeah. So, try and think about having like a nighttime turndown service for your little one. I'm not saying that you've got to wait on them hand and foot.

Well, I guess we do, don't we, when they're little? But it's about softening the levels of energy in their room. So, do they have a little night lamp? So, before they go to bed, What I do now, even in our bedrooms now, is I put the night lamps on before you go into the bedroom. Otherwise, you go in, you turn the big light on, your retina goes, "Ping! Brilliant! It's time to wake up." Whereas when you go in and it's soft lighting, you instantly feel more relaxed. And lights that are below your eye level, they mimic sunset. So, your body goes, "Oh, it's time to relax." If your kid loves a highly energetic duvet cover, which most kids do, you could have like a nighttime blankie that you then pull over the duvet that just calms down that energy. If your little one doesn't like being away from you at nighttime, which often happens because it's scary, like they spend the whole, you know, baby next to us, like the 5 months, 6 months, like, what? Some people, you know, for a long time, and then all of a sudden we're like, "Right, we've had enough of you now.

You can go into your own bedroom." And they're like, "Uh, why?

Why?" You know, and it's scary. So, having pictures of your family by the side of the bed, or even the pets. Sometimes they prefer the pet than the, you know, their family, and that's fine. But whatever it is by the side of their bed, so that when, it's almost like they can still see you when they're going to sleep. And also just being, or just trying to put their toys away at nighttime. Like laundry bins with lids on are my favourite feng shui item because you can just throw stuff in there, put the lid on top of it, and just calm down that energy. So, when they go to sleep, everything around them is calm. And, you know, if in doubt, just go and lie on their bed and think, could I go to sleep here.

Yeah, I love what you said about putting a lid on things as well. So we recently got Jake like, it's like an ottoman that he can use as a seat as well. But as soon as like it's time for a bath and his supper, I'll say tidy away time, and he's learned it at nursery. So he goes around and he scoops everything up one by one, puts it on, and then puts the lid down. And I'm like, oh my God, you, you genius child, I love you so much. Yeah, um, yeah, I loved reading in the book as well how certain colours and arrangements can change the energy of a room, like what you were just saying there. Now, this is what confuses me slightly because I read something, I think it was like in an anthropology book, that if you put a red or an orange light in your child's room at night, it helps them sleep better. It drops the cortisol levels. And also, like what you were saying, it kind of mimics a sunset, doesn't it? Because you get those fiery orange-red colors, like when the sky goes that beautiful color. However, what confuses me is I remember speaking to you before about one of my friends that painted her bedroom red. And you were saying how that is such fiery and angry and argumentative energy. So is that conflicting energy there? Is that conflicting information? Like, which of those is right? Is it calming him, or is it going to make him more angry? And like, yeah, it's a great question.

I mean, your bedtime reading is far more in-depth than mine, I have to say, that you're reading those books.

It's— there's a fine line between a lamp and a whole wall. In red. And if it's creating this sunset, because again, you've got a red, I'm showing my age, a red disco light, like in a nightclub versus like a soft, uh, salt lamp, for example. And if you have to squint when you look at it, that's a fiery red. Whereas if it's something that you can look at and it doesn't burn your retina, then that is a softer red. So, Each element has its own strengths, and each of them also can bring its own issues as well. And fire actually is, I, it's quite a nice element. It, it burns off negativity. It, it sort of brings out truths, and it's, it brings this lovely warmth, as you say, and connection. But if it's overly done, then it can lead to anxiety and stress and too much, too much stress and too much energy. And it turns the energy. You've probably heard the terms like yin and yang.

Yeah.

And yang is this effervescent fiery energy, like this bright red. And that's when you can't relax. Whereas yin is this lovely calming energy. And that's when you can relax. So, I think a salt lamp level is a much calmer version. It's not completely yin, like a navy blue, like it's not completely like blackout blind done, but it's dim enough to be able to look at it and for your eyes to get tired and then for you to drop off and think it's like this sunset. So, each of the elements are lovely, but each of them in excess can then cause this imbalance. Just like, yeah, white homes are really lovely and you look at them, you go, this is beautiful, and they look really lovely and clean and crisp. But white is a metal colour, and that's why like a white space can feel quite cold, like metal, like it doesn't have any warmth to it whatsoever. Whereas a little bit of white is, it's lovely, it's fresh, it's, you know, it's modern. Whereas too much of it just makes you feel like you're living, you know, in something with absolutely no soul whatsoever.

Yeah, because the majority of his bedroom is— it's like a very pale blue, and then we've got 3 bits of artwork on the wall, but they're nothing— they're nothing like out there or anything. It's like an elephant, a giraffe, and a lion, but they are very like neutral colors. We just kept it very neutral, beiges, do you know what I mean? Just to keep it soft, because when he goes in there, I want him to be able to just fall asleep.

Yeah.

And I mean, these red and orange lights that I'm talking about, they're not like disco lights, but they are like— they shine on the ceiling and make like a water pattern, you know, when water's reflected, light's reflecting off water. It's like that. So it's just very calming and soft. And he lies there and he just— you can see his eyes rolling as he watches this. I thought it must be doing something, but I thought I don't want to make him angry just before bed by putting all these reds and oranges in there, do you know what I So it's interesting that it has the water current to it because those waves represent the water energy and water puts out fire.

So therefore it will be reducing the fiery energy with that wave element with it. Did you purposefully get 3 pictures?

No. I've got 3 pictures in here as well. I think we've had this conversation before. 3 comes up a lot. Like my birthday is the 30th of the 3rd. Um, yeah, 3 comes along as well.

Your little gang is 3, and we found— I do that, and obviously 3 pictures is quite an interior design thing as well. Um, but it's a lovely thing for him if, like, and you could, like, name the 3 of them.

Oh, he already does. The middle one's the elephant, and I'll say, um, I'll go, who's that? And he'll say, giraffe. And I'll say, who's that? And he'll say, lion. And then I'll say, who's that? And point to the elephant, and he goes, Dada.

Oh, it's so cute. And I had a lovely lady that I worked with who, she's dyslexic and her kids are dyslexic as well. And she was saying, we were saying about like in children's bedrooms and everything needs to be relaxing. And she was like, well, for some people, like books are relaxing and you have a bedtime story. But for me and my kids, like books are really stressful because I can't read to them and they also can't read. So, she was like, "Books for me is really hard." So, she actually had these lovely drawings on the wall of their children's bedrooms. And then they created stories every night of these little people in the pictures and where they'd go and play and what they'd go and do. And it was such a beautiful way of really adapting your home to your situation. And I think that's the most important thing, that like with your little boy, if, if that makes him calm, then that makes him calm. And I talk about like neurodesign in the book for neurodiversity, or neurodiverse kids especially. And there are some kids that will find bright red really calming. Because it may be that their element is a fire element. So like, if I went out in a bright red jacket, I— it just wouldn't feel right to me. Like, bright red lipstick, I'm not a bright red lipstick person. But for some people, they are fine with that, whereas for me, I'm more happier in like the softer colours. And I think again, around the home, as long as you're surrounded by what makes you calm Yeah, then that is the most important thing.

Yeah, and I think reading through your book as well, there's also a section that includes tips for neurodivergent individuals as well. And I think that is such an important and probably overlooked area as well, because I've never read any feng shui books that talk about that. Now, I've just recently been diagnosed with ADHD, and it's really explained a lot. So how do things like lighting, clutter, how can they impact our neurodiverse minds?

That's so interesting. So it's interesting that you've been recently diagnosed and everything just seems to sort of make sense. And I think we're going through that stage now with adults that they're maybe going, getting diagnosed later, or maybe their kids are, and then they're sort of, they're looking at themselves. And your environment is huge, and again, it's very individual. So for one person They may feel calm in chaos. And for others, the chaos may be too much for them and you need to simplify that in your lives. And I think for a lot of people, the way that their home is designed can really help them to relax. And I think with neurodiversity, it's about being able to come into your space and just allow your mind to switch off so that you can relax when you come into the home. And so, like, your seat positioning can really have an impact on how you relax or how you focus at work. So we talk a lot about what's called the command position in feng shui, which is where, like, if you're at a desk— and it's the same in your bed— that you would have your back again against a solid wall. So, like where I am now, I've got the wall behind me, and that means that I don't have to constantly look over my shoulder to get distracted, or that something physical or metaphorical may, you know, come and sort of get me over my shoulder, if you like. And so, that can help me relax more because I'm not having to check behind me. I can see what's happening in front of me, that then enables me to concentrate on what I'm doing. But it's other things as well with, with homes, especially with ADHD, is about trying to be organised, but without being like overly clinical about it. And I worked with a lady called Amanda Hawes with the book, and she is an amazing lady. She's a child psychologist and she specialises is with kids and adults that are neurodivergent, and she calls it like this landing pad that you can have at the entrance of your home or in the bedroom. And it's literally like a gridded, even just a laminated piece of paper. And in each square is a home for everything. So, whether it's your keys, maybe your lanyard, maybe your EarPods, for example, and having that at the entrance of your home just really helps you to be organised. With where you are for the next day. And then again, just coming back to that decluttering of the home is allowing that energy to circulate, but it also helps you to relax as well. So if you're, if you have trouble switching off at nighttime, which I know a lot of ADHD kids and adults do, like your mind is just absolutely whirling around at nighttime, is by clearing the clutter in your bedroom or where you sit around at nighttime, just really being aware of your senses, having those lights that you can dim so you're not sat underneath bright lighting. You haven't got bright, sorry, loud music. Even the scent that you have in your home, making sure that it's really subtle and you haven't got lots of, you know, air fresheners around as well. Smells, all of those sorts of things can really make people feel uncomfortable. So, I wanted to incorporate this into my book as to how you can subtly make your home comfortable for absolutely everyone.

Yeah, because I was going to say, I think feng shui decluttering is a lot different from just standard tidying or minimalism, isn't it? And like what you were just saying there about the air fresheners, it just made me think about my mum's house. So, as soon as you go into my mum's house, you are met with an Air Wick diffuser that goes off as soon as someone walks past it, and it squirts into your bloody face, and it's always like a spiced apple or something really strong. And then you go into the living room and she's got cinnamon candles burning. Then you go into the kitchen, she's got like a raspberry diffuser that's like spraying in your face as you walk past the fridge. And I'm like, Jesus Christ, it's like walking into a horse handbag, honestly.

You just—

it's, it's just like, it's, it's too many, it's too many things. Like, sense— sensory for me, it's sensory overload.

Yeah, it is. And, and that's the thing to, to think about is the energy that all of that stuff is giving off. So, if you've got a house that has got all of the air fresheners, or you know somebody that does, the TV is on very loud, the decor in the living room is very loud, you know, the smells coming from the kitchen is a lot. Like there's, when you're not neurodivergent, you don't notice these things and you, are not impacted by them so much. But when you are and you go into these spaces, everything, it just feels so overwhelming and it can be completely exhausting. And so you want your home to be somewhere where you can come home.

Yeah.

And refresh. And because as soon as you go out the front door and into the world again, you're hit with all of these sensory things again. And so that's why playing the same meditation every night works for some people that are neurodivergent as well, because it's that routine.

Yeah.

So listening to the same thing every time before you go to bed, even using like an essential oil or the same face wash, the same toothpaste, like all things like that, having it the same so that your body's like, ah, I recognise this.

Yeah.

I can— it is now my bedtime coming to sleep. So yeah, it's just, it's a whole new level to just keeping your house tidy.

And if someone listening to this right now is probably going through like a big life transition, maybe a breakup or a new job or moving home, how can you kind of advise them through Feng Shui? How can you help them navigate that energetically and emotionally?

It's a really good question because each of them would be very different.

Yeah.

So say for example, if you were going through a breakup, one of the things I would say is Things like new bedsheets, that those bedsheets will hold onto energy. You want that refresh. But even if you've maybe had a huge argument with your partner or the energy's just a bit not great, everyone's a bit, you know, narky with each other. I think that's a Midlands saying actually, narky.

I always say these things and I'm like, do people know what I'm talking about?

You know, if you've just been a bit bitey with each other, like changing the energy of your sheets. If you are wanting a change of job, I think, and I know you talk about this all the time, like turning up as the future version of you. So if you have been through a breakup or you're going to a new job or you're moving house, like, how is that 6— that version of you from 6 months ahead turning up now in your home and making sure that your home reflects your intentions for the next 6 months? So if you've broken up with somebody So this Christmas, have you got Christmas decorations from, you know, old family members, you know, from previous relationships that you've been given? Why are they still in your house? Like, you don't want that energy going forwards. Or if you're looking for a new job— so when I found Feng Shui and I was a teacher for 10 years, I realized on the bookshelf was loads of teaching books and my folders from when I was studying. I was like, I don't need them. I need to get rid of them. I need to move forwards. And like, when I was writing my book, book, you know, as much as I wanted to sit in there in my tracksuit and write it, you know, with my hair scraped, you know, I'm sure there were days when I was just sat with a mad bun on top of my head, you know, just sort of typing away. But when I wrote it, I was like, I want to write it so if somebody came to my door now, I'd be like, yeah, I am the author of The Calm and Happy Home. And so your energy that you are putting out there, and I know you talk about this, is like matching it. But does the energy in your home also match who you are now. So your clothes in your wardrobe, the stuff in your larder, like if you got, you know, your cupboard or whatever it is, like 16 bottles of cinnamon, you know, that you've not opened for a while, like really refresh that energy and use your intention as to whatever life stage you are going into now and ask your house to support you. So say you're not with your partner anymore, ask your home to support you in your next stage, or finding somebody new, or finding that new job, because your house can and will have your back if it's got a relationship with you. If it has no relationship with you, it's like asking a stranger on the street to say, can you lend me £50? And they're probably like, no, I don't think so. Whereas if you asked a friend, they'd be like, yeah, of course. Like, can you— oh, I'll pay you back soon. And they would give it to you. So just, it's about aligning yourself and your home throughout your next transition. Where do you want to be in 6 months' time? And does the energy in your home support that version of you?

I just went to a self-development day yesterday, and it was all about your inevitable success, and we were talking about your future self and where you wanted to be in 6 months' time. And now that I've got some clarity on where I want to be— Jake is away at my mom's this weekend— you have totally inspired me to not just declutter the house but to declutter it in a feng shui way. So that I can be totally intentional. Because I do have things from past relationships. When I go into my mom's house, by the way, she's got all of these freaking canvases on the wall. She's still got a freaking canvas of me at a wedding with my ex on the wall from like 15 years ago. And every time my partner comes in, he looks up at it and he like looks back at me, and I'm like, I've been with Johnny like 11 years now. Oh, why is she still got this fucking canvas on the wall? Honestly, but yeah, I'm gonna do that. I'm going to totally intentionally declutter my house this weekend. Yeah, I think, I think it's just you've totally inspired me to do that because I always declutter but I never do it with feng shui in mind. I do it in almost like a Marie Kondo way. I just like, yeah, yeah, this no longer serves me, I'm getting rid of it.

And even things like, like lanyards from like the beginning of your journey. And it's difficult because I know people like to hold on to a memory and I'm really harsh with it. I'm like, well, I can remember going so I don't need a lanyard from when I went. But where were you in your stage of career when you got that lanyard? Were you there dreaming of being that speaker on stage? Because now you are that speaker on stage.

Yeah.

So you're no longer that person that goes to some of these events wishing that you were that person there. You are that person there now. And so, or like, you may be wanting to be that person. So maybe people came to Manifest last year and they were like, I want to be on the stage this year. Then get your lanyard and be like, and write on the bottom of it, speaker. Yeah, like, that's what— that's the difference of the energy. So yes, keep on to stuff, but is it really serving you? And is it serving this, this next stage of where you want to go to? And just looking at the stuff that you surround yourself with, where you work, your pictures, all of that— is it really pushing this next version of you?

That's perfect. Honestly, I love that so much. I'd say finally, Kimberley, as well, your book is full of warmth and wisdom right the way throughout, from start to finish. Now, for listeners who want to start small, what is one simple action that they could take today to create that calmer, happier home that truly supports their energy?

Oh, Mart, that's really hard. One thing?

If you just had to choose one thing to create a calmer, happier home.

Okay.

Where would you start?

Choose the room in your home where most of the tension comes. So, where you have the most arguments or the most tension, or even sometimes in homes, like the most accidents. Like sometimes people, like you may have a room where you're always stubbing your toe on something, or, because all of these things will show me.

Yeah.

If I came to your home, they would tell me where the energy is off. So you can use your intuition. Where are most of the arguments? And then look around and go, okay, can the energy move around this space? And just a really simple tidy up, clean up. Like if you've got, you know, I just, I want to go around to your mum's and take that canvas down.

Yeah, please do, please.

Honestly, just like, can the energy move around? And is it supporting you going forwards? Having a look at the photos, like, are are they all photos from 10 years ago? Or are they photos of you like recently? And I know I'm really guilty of this as well, thinking, "Oh, well, I looked great 10 years ago, so I'm just gonna keep those photos up, and I don't wanna really wanna show like the version that I am now." But it's really about making sure that the energy can circulate. Is it this version of you now and how you want to move forwards? And if there's something in that room that you don't like, do something about it. Like, just like that picture, and this is— This is, I don't know why this is always coming to mind today, pictures. Maybe pictures is something that we need to be speaking about because you talked about the pictures in your son's room and the pictures at your mum's house. Like, in your living room, if there are pictures of people that you don't like, because it might be a wedding picture with somebody in there, like of your family or your partner's family, for example, don't have them up. We pay so much money to live in our homes that we deserve. You know, if you wouldn't invite them around for a cup of tea willingly, then don't have pictures of these people in your home. Open the doors up. I'm now going to give you like 5 things. Open the doors, open the windows, let the energy in. Like, out with the old, in with the new. There's my one tip. Out with the old and in with the new for the energy.

What do you think about pictures of dead people? Just because in my living room, room. I know this sounds weird, just in my living room I've got a picture of— this is so bad— it was a portrait that was taken before Jake was born. So it's me, Johnny, and JJ, our dog. And then over the other side I've just got on a shelf, it's just like my granddad's memorial thing from the funeral, and I just put it up there next to his ashes. And I just, I talk to him every now and again. Do you think that's bad energy?

So can I just clarify, when you say dead people, like, is it a photo of a dead person or they just no longer with a dead relative. They're just no longer with it.

A dead relative. Yeah.

Yes.

Yeah.

I wasn't sure if, like, I've got a picture of a dead person, like, on—

no, no, no, no, not someone like actually like a corpse. It's literally like it's his memorial photo from his, uh, funeral, and I've just got it next to his ashes up on a shelf in the living room.

I think it's beautiful. I think grief is a really hard thing, and it's really individual, and I think some strict feng shui practitioners will be like, the ashes shouldn't be there, like, this is going to change the energy in your home. And don't get me wrong, it will, but if it brings you comfort, then absolutely keep it there. Because I have, like, my mum passed away, gosh, like 15 years ago, and I've got her picture there opposite me now looking over my desk where I am now because I feel that she's watching over me whilst I'm working. And I think the fact that you've got your relatives there, like watching you build your own family, I think is a really beautiful thing. And I think it's completely individual. The only place where I wouldn't have pictures like that is in your bedroom.

Yeah.

But really any sort of family pictures living or no longer with us, like looking over you, you know, your bedroom's a private space. So, I wouldn't have pictures of people in there, but in your living room, I think it's a beautiful thing to have.

Kimberly, as always, that was absolutely amazing. Every time you come on, I'm always just left feeling so calm, inspired, and wanting to rearrange my whole house and start fresh, but in the best possible way. I just love how you make feng shui so simple, modern, accessible, and how it's really about creating a space that supports who we are becoming, not just how things look as well. And just before we go, you're joining us again at Manifest 2026. I can't get rid of you. Um, this right here in Newcastle in the UK next year, aren't you?

Oh, I can't wait, honestly. Well, first of all, thank you so much for having me back on. Like, my whole aim is to make feng shui not overwhelming and accessible, and I just, I love our chats.

I mean, crikey, you know, we've gone from dead people to bathrooms to, you know, to windows and all around the house and pictures of you and your mum's and the cinnamon candles.

But it is really lovely because this is real life. This is what what people's homes are. And to come on and have the opportunity for that, I'm so grateful. And then to come back to Manifest, because Manifest last year was so special. I hold it so deeply in my heart because, oh, to be in a room with people like that where everybody is wanting something for the better. Yeah, from all walks of life. From all demographics, from all ages. Everyone was in there sharing a collective vision. And it was so powerful. And some of the stories that I've heard from people that have been to that, that came along, are just so beautiful. And they are coming back again.

Yeah.

And I think that shows you what an incredible event it is, that as soon as people finished that day, the early bird tickets came in, they booked again. Yeah. And a lot of these people don't live in Newcastle.

Yeah.

They travel from all over the UK. There's a lady that came from, there's quite a few ladies from Ireland. There was a lady there from Australia that was just visiting family and she was like, "Oh, I just came because, you know, I wanted to see everyone here." And I think that's testament to what an incredible event it is. And I think next year is, I mean, I don't know how, but I think it's going to be even more incredible. And I'm so grateful to be back. And yeah, I really can't wait.

So grateful to have you. But yeah, we had attendees from Brazil, New Zealand, Australia, South Africa. It was insane. It blew my mind to think that this has gone so global that people are coming to my little hometown in Newcastle and they'd never been here before. Some of them hadn't even been to the UK before and they were coming just to visit Newcastle for that weekend just so that they could come to Manifest. Found that crazy.

It's such a unique event and you should be so proud because I know you did it it all by yourself, and there's nothing like it in the world. I've been looking for one over here in Australia because I think it's something that would go down so well because it literally doesn't exist. But it doesn't exist. So maybe you need to do a world tour.

God, don't put that in me ADHD brain because it will happen probably next week. So for everyone listening, if you have been listening to this episode and you found yourself nodding along thinking, I need this calm in me home, then then you've got to grab a copy of Kimberley's new book, The Calm and Happy Home, out everywhere. It was released on 11/11, of all the dates in the calendar, 11th of November, and it's packed with practical, easy-to-follow tips that can genuinely change how you feel in your space and in your life. I've read it, I absolutely loved it. You can find The Calm and Happy Home everywhere books are sold, or you can head to the show notes for this episode and I'll pop the link in there As always, if you've enjoyed this episode, please take a moment to rate, review, share it with someone who would love it as well. It really helps the podcast reach more people who need these conversations. Kimberly, thank you again for coming back for a third time. I'm sure it won't be the last. And to everyone listening, go move a plant, clear a corner. I know I will be. Start inviting that calm, happy energy today. See you all next Friday.

Bye!

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