229: You're not stuck... you're just playing small, ft. Francesca Amber

Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of Canny Crystals, the podcast. I hope that you're all well. My name is Mart Tweedy, I'm your host. And this week I haven't prepared a podcast. I have not prepared anything. However, I recently had a chat with the amazing Francesca Amber from Law of Attraction Changed My Life. We all know and love Fran, don't we? And it was basically to speak all about Manifest 2026. And when I listened back to this episode when it went out, I just thought, you know what, this is such a great episode, my audience need to hear this as well. So bit of a cop-out from me this week, but I really think that everything I spoke about needs to be heard. And I truly believe that the message that I'm trying to convey in this podcast episode is something that we all need to hear. So I hope that you love the episode. I will be back next week. I hope that you love listening to mine and Fran's chat. It was really, really funny. It's always lovely to catch up with Fran. So I'm going to pop the episode on now, and I'll see you all for a brand new episode next Friday. See you soon.

What up, bitches? Welcome to Law of Attraction Changed My Life. I'm your host Francesca Amber, and this week I have a guest. You know him, you've seen him before, he's been here 500 times, but he's back. It's Mark from Canny Crystals.

This is only my second time, you know. The last time was like 4 years ago.

Lies.

You've been on mine twice. Yeah, but the last time I was on yours was the day that I turned up at your house with a bottle of wine and a balloon for your second podcast birthday. That was 4 years ago. Can you believe it?

I feel like you've been on my podcast 500 times.

You've been on mine twice. That's probably why.

Maybe. Yeah. I can't really tell the difference between what's yours and what's mine, to be honest. We share everything. So there we are. How are you?

I'm very well. How are you?

Do you know what? I just want to flex a little bit because, you know, some goals are quite hard to achieve. Where there's some that are like very, they're like a standalone thing. I wanna get a book published, I want to buy a house, I wanna do whatever. I find those goals are number one, very satisfying to reach 'cause then you can be like, boom, bitches, I've done it. But then there's other goals that are like, I wanna be healthier, I wanna live a healthy lifestyle, or I wanna have a relaxed nervous system where I wake up every day and I'm not feeling like I'm drowning in my own shit that I've fucking created in my life. And those goals, I think they don't sound as like splashy, but they're actually like often the, the hardest ones to fucking do. So anyway, sorry, long story short, last year, 2025, one of my goals when I did my goals for the year was when the girls started school, I wanted to come out of survival mode, which was a real thing, right? That was a real thing. When those girls were babies, I was in fucking survival mode, but I wanted to come out of that place after nearly 5 years and be able to be relaxed in everyday life. And that is a lot easier said than done. Part mindset work, part real life work. Anyway, for the last 3 months, I have worked almost every day on making that my reality. And just yesterday was the first day in, I'm gonna say, 6 years that I've felt, hmm, I'm okay. I've got all my work done, I'm ahead of schedule, I know what the fuck's going on, and that is in part thanks to you, but it feels fucking amazing.

Good, I'm so glad as well, because obviously like the way I saw you stressed for probably the last year or so.

5 years, Mart, 5 years.

I think for the last year in particular, every time I voice noted you, it would end in tears and you would be crying because you had all of this on your plate. When in actual fact I sat you down a couple of weeks ago, almost like a bloody life coach, and I was like, right, you are going to be accountable to me every single day. You're going to write down what it is that you're actually doing and where all of your hours go. And then I think once you actually saw that on paper, you were able to then say, actually, this is what I need, and this is what I need here in my personal life, this is what I need here in my business life. And it just helps you to get a bit of clarity, and I think it was very illuminating for you, wasn't it?

Very illuminating. I feel like taking an audit of your life, and I'm saying this to anyone that feels stressed out and overwhelmed, sometimes it's not the amount of stuff you're doing, it's the lack of clarity on what there is. So like, imagine, right, if you won one of those Omaze houses. I always think, wow, what a fucking dream. But when I first bought a house, it was very different to owning a flat. All of a sudden you're like, shit, I've got to think about guttering, I've got to think about roof shit, if my fence panel blows down, it's a very different beast. And it's a little bit like winning a massive mansion on Omaze and suddenly being like, fuck, I don't even know how you look after a house of this size. Like, where's the, the, the stopcock? Where's— and, and no one's told you, you don't know. There's just some man that's like, oh, I'll tell you one day. You're like, what? It creates so much anxiety in your life. So I would urge anyone to just do a full audit of your life. And like I say, this is not an overnight— sorry, this is not the point of this podcast, but this just came out first, but it's, it's not an overnight thing. I didn't sort this out overnight. It genuinely took me 3 months, and it took sometimes hour-long conversations with various people, not just me, like taking other people and being like, how do I get this better? How do I get clarity on this? And yeah, it's taken me 3 months, but honestly, I now am in a place where I'm just relaxed and in control, and I fucking love it.

I think that's something else that you didn't have a lot of clarity around was what was actually going on in your own work. Because obviously delegation is amazing, isn't it? But like I was saying to you yesterday, if we can still be involved in certain tasks that don't actually take us a lot of time, in the space of time it takes us to send that email, if we could learn to do that ourselves, it changes everything. Like yesterday, you asked me to do something and I was like, oh, I can show you how to do this in 60 seconds. And then you sent me a voice note and you were like, are you joking me? All this time I've been delegating this to everyone else and it's taken up so much time and sat on their plates for like God knows how many weeks, and I could have just done this in 60 seconds.

You are, Mart, right? This isn't a service he offers, but if anyone wants a life or business coach, I would highly recommend Mart Tweedy. So yeah, this is one of the things that I do have limiting beliefs around technology, and it is something that has held me back considering my entire business is based around technology. It has held me back for so long, and there are certain things where you've just said to me, oh look, just do it like this, and I'm like, oh, like, like a grandpa being shown an iPhone for the first time. I'm like, oh my fucking God, it's— a lot of it is so simple, guys. You can change your mindset, I promise you, on anything. I honestly feel so empowered to like do things in my own business now, and I know how to do— yeah, I just feel amazing. And you know what's interesting is we also discovered that a lot of my overwhelm was coming from not actually work but everything else in my life, like running a house to a certain standard, I'd like to say, with 3 children, like, it's a lot. So now I've got my sister who's coming and being my wife one day a week, and it's fucking amazing. She does all the things that you couldn't ask a cleaner to do, but you also couldn't ask, like, a professional PA to do. Like, she's like a wife. Every time I looked and thought, what do I need as a successful man? What do I need? I need a fucking wife. That's why all successful businessmen have a fucking wife. So now she comes, she puts my laundry away, she jet washes my patio. She like— oh, it's amazing. I feel so in control of my life.

I think for this season of your life, that's exactly what you need as well, because obviously in past seasons of your life you've thought, right, my business is booming, I need this support here in terms of tech and, you know, all the admin. But when I actually looked at what you were doing, about 6 hours of your day was spent on, you know, looking after the girls, cooking, cleaning, putting the laundry away and just general household tasks. And that's why I thought, well, the majority of your overwhelm is because you aren't supported in the home. You've got 3 young children. I honestly don't know how you do without a partner, because I've got a partner and I've got a 2-year-old, and I still struggle every single day trying to run a business as well as like go to the gym and look after myself and cook my own food. So I think with you, all you need is that housewife there, and I think you've got that now in Anoushka, and it's obviously doing you—

I've got a wife.

You've got a wife.

It's fantastic.

She is lesbian after all.

She is not with her sister though, that'd be weird. I do understand why the patriarchy exists. I totally get it. As now somebody that is partaking in the capitalist, uh, world, I totally understand. If I could get some young girl— sorry, this sounds really predatory, I'm not going to do this— but like, if I could get some young girl and be like, all right darling, do you want to get in my car? I'll show you a good time. Take her out for a £70 steak and then be like, would you like to sign yourself up? I'll give you this ring for like £3 grand and you can sign yourself up to a lifetime of free labor, clean my house, raise my children, uh, do everything for me. The patriarchy is a fucking incredible thing. If I— like, when you look at it for men, it's insane. Imagine how successful I'd be if I had a wife. But for women, we're getting fucked. Um, but not in a good way. Anyway, I just wanted to say that right at the beginning because it is honestly such a— like, I can tick that goal now and be like, yeah, I'm fucking— I'm, I'm on it.

You, you are. And I think you obviously put yourself down a lot as well though, Fran. You always downplay skills when actually you built this business from the fucking ground up. And just 5 years ago you had built this business on— what was it? Not ThriveCart. What's the other one? SamCart?

No, what's that thing called? Buzzsprout?

No, the bloody website thing.

Oh, Big Cartel.

Big Cartel. You built an entire business around Big Cartel. Then you moved into podcasting on Buzzsprout and you've just learned from there. But I think you downplay your tech skills so, so much when actually I'm empowering you to do the exact opposite. You are, you are incredible at what you do. That's all there is to say.

Thank you. I'm a tech genius now. I can create my own ManyChat flows. There's no stopping me. Do you know what? I always say that to people, like, I, it does not come naturally to me doing the technical side of things, but when I wanted to create my first product, which was a candle with my sister, I was like, do you know what? I'm sure years ago, I can't remember what I would have been selling, something dodgy, and I was like, right, Big Cartel, you go on there, it's completely free. This is not an ad, I don't get paid by this or anything, but if you've got something you want to sell— my sister does it for her tarot readings actually. I said to Anoushka, Big Cartel, completely free. I think you can upload up to 6 products before you have to pay a thing. They don't take any fees. And if you just want to get started, I'm a big fan of like starting imperfectly. A great example of that would be Patreon, right? I started the book club on Patreon. They will fuck you for your fees. Like, they were taking something like £6,000 a month off me. It was insane. But I got started on there. It got me started. So this is a little message to anyone listening. If you don't know the perfect way to start your podcast, start your business, start whatever, just fucking start. I only started filming my episodes in the last year. I've been doing this podcast for 5 years. I've only just started filming and having them done in a studio. Just recently, you are able to start with a £60 microphone under a duvet with an old laptop. That's my PSA.

There's a saying that I, that I've always had, like in the back of my head from a conference that I went to about business a couple of years ago, and they said, fly before you try. And what they meant by this is like, obviously put your offer out there, put whatever it is like that is your area of expertise out there first. Before you try and push it into what everyone else has. Because if you think about starting a podcast, for example, you look at all the podcasts people, you know, people that are at the top of the charts, and you think, oh, I'll put a couple of episodes out and all of a sudden I'll be there as well. It doesn't work like that. People only see the overnight success part, don't they? They don't actually see all of the hard work.

Well, it did work like that for me, actually. I became number one within 3 weeks, so bad example. But no, I know what you mean. Yeah, there was 10 years of YouTube videos before that. So yeah, you're right.

Yeah, yeah. So fly before you try. I love that saying.

Do you know what phrase I really love? I found it the other day. I've actually got a note on my phone of every time I hear a quote that I love, I just write it down. And it was a woman being like, oh my God, I spend all day going to Pilates and my husband like pays for everything. And someone in the comments said, if he can feed you, he can starve you.

Yeah, he's got all the control.

True with anything. If you give anyone too much power, if they can feed you, they can starve you. Anyway, welcome to Law of Attraction Changed My Life. We're already, what, fucking 15 minutes in? I don't even know, I can't even see the time. Oh, 12 minutes, there we go. Um, I'm very excited to have you here because we are having another party this year, and by party I mean Manifest. Yeah, tell us about it.

So I think a few of your listeners might have obviously heard of Manifest, but Manifest is a live event around Manifestation, mindset, and spirituality. But if I'm totally honest with you, I think that's just the category that it fits in. I think what it really is is a room where people get to stop pretending that they're fine, because I think the best way that I can describe it is it's kind of self-development talks from leading experts and workshops in sound healing, vision boarding, yoga, Reiki. But then we've also got all these exhibitors with different people selling different services like life coaching, massages. Obviously, Cani Crystals is going to be there selling crystals and candles Vouks, and it's just somewhere that you can come, be yourself, and just switch off the entire weekend. Now, for the last 5 to 6 years, I've been teaching manifestation online through podcasts, courses, memberships, challenges, and don't get us wrong, like, I absolutely love all that, but I kept noticing something, that people were messaging me saying they knew exactly what to do and they understood the assignment they understood like visualization and everything else and energy, but they still felt stuck or alone, like they were the only ones not quite getting it. And I think I recognize that feeling because I felt like that myself in the past. There is something like about being physically in a room with other people who also want that, want more from life, who want to think differently or want to believe in energy and intention, and it just hits differently. You can't scroll past it like you would on Instagram or you can't half listen like you would be doing with a podcast while doing the dishes. You're there, you're literally present in it. So the idea for Manifest came up after one of my smaller live workshops, and I remember looking around the room at the end thinking, this is it, this is the feeling that I want to bottle, this connection. Like, people were hugging, they were swapping numbers, a couple of them were crying in the toilets, and they were making decisions that they'd been putting off for years. And I thought, why are we not doing this on a larger scale? 'Like, wouldn't it be amazing if the next time I do this it could be with some incredible podcast guests that I've had on my own show, like yourself, where everyone comes together and everyone speaks about their area of expertise?' And I just went around my friend's house one night. Before I know it, I'm sat there with a cup of tea booking a venue, and I just approached a few people like yourself, Fran, about the possibility of speaking at it. And all of that came from just seeing what happens when people feel seen in real life And if I'm being totally honest, I think it also came partly from my own growth as well. Like, I could feel myself playing small in that stage of my life. I felt like I was staying in what felt safe, and Manifest felt like the next scary but right step. The kind of step where I thought to myself, I don't know how this is going to work, but I know that if I take some form of inspired action, the universe has got to meet me halfway, and I'll ultimately regret this if I don't try. So I think it exists because I believe manifestation isn't just something that you journal about alone in your kitchen. Like, it's something that comes to life when you physically witness it, or when you're brave enough to say that you want it out loud. So I honestly feel like when I first came up with the idea of it, me life was very full, but also kind of like slightly boxed in as well. So on the outside, everything obviously looked good, like the business was doing well, the podcast was growing, The Academy was building momentum. I just adopted a baby. I had a house, responsibilities, you know, all that grown-up shit that we all work towards. But internally, I always feel like a sense of restlessness. Like, it's not unhappiness or dissatisfaction, it's just like a quiet sense that I'm capable of more and that I'm meant to stretch myself in a different way. And that feeling, it's really uncomfortable because it doesn't come with instructions. It's just there. It's just tapping away at you. And I remember being sat at the table in my living room one night after everyone else had gone to bed. The house was quiet, my laptop was open, and I just had this thought of, if I wasn't scared, what would I love to do next? And the answer that came up wasn't another online course, it wasn't another digital product, it was something live, like something bigger, something that felt slightly ridiculous. And straight away, the interesting thing is my immediate reaction to that thought was Don't be so stupid, because with a live event you can't hide, you can't pre-record it, you can't edit it, you know, you have to show up fully. And financially it's a risk, emotionally it's a risk, reputationally it's a risk, but that's what makes it exciting. Now at that time in my life, I was really confronting my own upper limits, so my own patterns of staying comfortable. And I talk about expansion all the time. But I realized that I was being invited into my own next level of expansion. So Manifest wasn't born out of like a neat 5-year plan. It was more born out of that slightly uncomfortable question of, am I playing too safe here? And I think once I started to see that, I couldn't unsee it. So it felt like one of those moments where life might be nudging you forward, and you can either lean in or you can shrink yourself back and just convince yourself that you're fine where you are. So I chose to lean in. And honestly, even now, I can trace so much of my own growth back to that one decision. And I think the biggest thing, the biggest difference, is that Manifest doesn't try to make you feel broken. And I don't mean that dramatically, but I've been in rooms before where the underlying message, even unintentionally, is you need to upgrade yourself, you know, fix your habits, fix your mindset, fix your morning routine, wake up at 5 AM, do Sunrise yoga, fix your income, fix your body, fix your energy. I've even been to things like that when I've been with you, Fran, mentioning no names, and we left feeling like we had homework for the rest of our lives, didn't we? We were exhausted. And I hate going to things where you're like, this is amazing, speakers are incredible, but here comes the upsell, and it's like, join our mastermind right now for £11,111, angel numbers. Manifest isn't that. It's not about telling people that they need to become someone else to deserve more. It's just about reminding them that they're already someone fucking powerful. They've just maybe forgotten that, you know. There's no shame in the room. There's no comparison leaderboard. There's no pressure to network like your life depends on it. It's just grounded and human. You'll hear real stories. You'll hear people talk about doubt, fear, and those kind of, you know, messy middle seasons of their lives. You'll see speakers who aren't pretending that they've mastered life, and I think that makes a huge difference because when someone stands on a stage and says, "I've struggled with this as well," it lowers the barrier for everyone else in the room. And I also think Manifest honors real life because people have kids, jobs, debt, responsibilities, mental health challenges, hormones, grief, all of it. So manifestation happens inside real complicated lives, doesn't it? So the conversations all reflect that. And maybe the most important difference in terms of Manifest to any other thing that's out there at the moment is that you don't leave with a to-do list as long as your arm. You leave with clarity, and clarity changes behavior more sustainably than pressure ever could. So for me personally, Manifest isn't about a temporary high It's about a steady shift, and those steady shifts are the ones that actually change things for us. For me, it's not about the hype or the pressure, it's more about connection, and I think connection helps to change people.

Definitely. I think these days people just want more in-real-life experiences and more meeting up in person. Like, I think we've gone too far one way with like everything being online, and also everything now weirdly going a bit like AI-y. Like, every time you see something, you're like Is that even real? Like, we don't know what's real. Do you know what? People have been taken in by these old influencers. Have you seen them? They're like ladies in their 80s and 90s. My friend Sam sent me one. She's like, look at this woman, she's so inspiring, she looks great in her 90s. And I'm like, she's a fucking AI model, Sam. Look at her. Are they AI? Yeah, a lot of them. There's AI influencers now. So you're looking at like somebody looking like, like this, like they're talking on a podcast. But it's AI. The whole thing is AI. That person doesn't exist at all. There's a lady I know from baby group who, she's crazy, and she just posted a thing for her birthday this morning and it's her in like a latex bodysuit with like a birthday cake and she's got 3 arms in one of them. And some of the people in the comments are like, oh my God, you look amazing in that picture. And I'm like, it's the fuck, what the fuck is going on? Like, this is mental. So yeah, I feel like the antidote to this where everyone's starting to feel like what the fuck is even real anymore is doing what cannot be replicated with AI, and that is meeting up in person, being really there with your energy, with your spirit, with real people. Hopefully not with three arms.

I think when we go— I think when we gather people together as well, it amplifies manifestation. Like, I honestly think we underestimate how much our environment shapes our beliefs, don't we? Like, we can all sit at home journaling about our dream life but then 5 minutes later we're back in our normal surroundings around the same conversations, the same doubts, the same limitations. And it's not that you're weak or anything like that, it's just that we're influenced by what's around us. But when you gather people together in a room who all believe in growth and energy, and they all believe that they're capable of more, something has got to shift.

100%.

And it normalizes that expansion. It's like when you're the only one in your friendship group trying to change your life and you feel slightly ridiculous for wanting more, then suddenly you're in a room where wanting more is the baseline. It changes everything, doesn't it? It's not weird or delusional. It's kind of expected. And that changes your internal dialogue as well. I remember at one of the first live events that I ever did, there was a woman who said to us at the end, "I didn't realize how much that I was shrinking myself until I sat next to that lady over there who was dreaming bigger than me." Yeah. And I think that stuck with us. Because we don't just rise because someone tells us to. We rise because we see it as possible.

Normal.

Yeah, what's that saying? Like, we are the byproduct of the 5 people that we hang around with the most. So naturally, if we hang around with 5 energy vampires, or Negative Nancys as I call them, we're going to feel drained. But on the flip side of that, if we surround ourselves with inspirational people, guess what's going to happen? Like This is the one of the reasons that I love to be in your company, Fran, because every time I come to your house or we meet up in London, I always leave feeling super inspired to do more or to be better at what I do because of the energy that you give off. It's almost like it releases endorphins within just from being around the right kind of people. And I think there's something incredibly regulating about real-life connection as well, like when we have that eye contact and the laughter and the shared emotion. Everyone seems to be off the phones and present. You know, I know we're doing this book in the book club next month, um, that level of connection does something to your nervous system and it tells you that you're not alone. And when you don't feel alone, you're braver, aren't you? I think that's the real amplification here. Like, if I think about the energy of the day in terms of like manifest, I probably think about this to an obsessive level. I'm sure I'm autistic to a certain degree because I've been to events where the content was great, but I left feeling wired or overwhelmed, maybe even slightly inadequate, and like I had 147 new things that I should be doing. And I never wanted Manifest to feel like that. I think people underestimate how sensitive we are to these environments that we're in. Like, you can walk into a room and instantly feel small, can't you? Or you can walk into a room and instantly feel safe. That's not accidental. It's the energy of the room that you're in. So I like to think about everything when I'm putting Manifest on. Like, I think about how people feel when they queue up. I think about how the first 5 minutes when they first sit down. I think about how the day builds and when people will need grounding rather than stimulation. I think about when to lift the energy and when to slow it right down again, because manifestation isn't about hype, it's more about body regulation, isn't it? Like, if someone is sat there feeling behind in life and comparing themselves everyone else in the room are overwhelmed by these huge dreams that they have, they're not going to receive anything. They're going to be armored, and I don't want armored at our events. I want shoulders dropping. I want people looking around thinking, oh my God, this is my tribe, these are my kind of people. And I think there's something powerful about that specific moment when someone realizes they're not the only one who believes in energy or mindset or wanting more.. It's like a little like internal kind of, ah, you know, that exhale. That's the energy I'm protecting here. And obviously bringing this back to manifestation, you don't just manifest through your thoughts, do you? You manifest through your state. So if your life feels chaotic or rushed or loud or pressured, what are you creating from? Like, what are you creating from? Sometimes the most productive thing that you can do for your future is put yourself in a room that regulates you, and that's exactly what Manifest is designed to do. It's not about blasting people with motivation, it's about creating a space where they can actually hear themselves again, and I think that takes intention to create. One of the biggest shifts that I see in people when they're in a room of like-minded others is self-trust. Not in a kind of like, I'm going to change me whole life tomorrow way, but in a grounded and steady way, so people will stop asking everyone else what they should do and instead they start asking themselves what they should do. So I've had people leave and then message us afterwards saying that they finally made the phone call that they've been avoiding, or they applied for the job, or they ended that relationship that they've been abusive in for like the last 10 years, or they'd started the thing that they've been sitting on for years. And this isn't because they were all hyped up from the event, it's because something clicked internally. And I think that's fucking powerful, to be honest with you. Like we don't need more information most of the time, we just need permission, don't we? And sometimes being in a room full of people and choosing growth, it gives you that permission.

Yeah, and what you say as well about like shrinking yourself, I think we all have people in our lives who are incredible friends, lovely friends, people that we want to be with. We wouldn't class them as negative people, they're not negative for us. However, they're not on the same journey as us. Like, some of my, my closest friends are broke. Like, not broke, but like, they'll, they'll complain about like, oh God, I can't afford to do this, or I can't afford to go on holiday, whatever it might be. And it doesn't mean that they're bad people, and you obviously don't be like, right, I'm cutting you out, you're dragging my energy down. However, it does make you shrink yourself sometimes. It may be that you won't mention, you know, certain things that you've done, Recently, and this is like a fucking— like, this is a big deal for me because I really wanted to show Bo business class on a flight. So Bo and I are going to LA at Easter, and I was like, I really want to do business class flights because her dad took me on a business class flight to LA like probably 10 years ago. I had the fucking time of my life. I ate every chocolate bar on board, I watched every movie, I drank so much, and he woke up the other end, and I was like, fucking hell. I've had a wild time. And I was like, Bo, I like, I really want to show her that. Like, the twins are too young to like appreciate it, but I really wanted her to experience that. And it's like, actually, when you do that, you kind of want to like be like, oh my God, guess what? But when you're telling your friends that are saying, oh, I can't really afford to take my children on holiday this year, you do find yourself shrinking who you are and kind of what you are able to say. Yeah. And so I recently made some friends who actually— one is a Book Club Bitch, and last year she invited me to Dubai. Um, and all these women, right, they're all into like self-development and they've all got online businesses. They are fucking rich as fuck, right? They, they literally are all flying business or first class everywhere. That we stayed in this bougie place in Dubai that was like so expensive. Like, fucking Wayne Rooney was staying there, Molly-Mai at the same time. It was crazy. And just being around those people, it actually does make you feel a little bit uncomfortable because you're like, oh shit, now I'm the poor one. Like, this is like a bit of a turnaround. And it makes you stretch. It does make you stretch and grow. So I feel like, yeah, it's, it's so important to be able to surround yourself or be able to talk to people. Like, I feel like you and I can quite often just talk about like 'Okay, how much did you make on this thing?' And it's numbers I would never say to my other friends, but I feel like we can just talk about. So yeah, I think it's important to have those people, and maybe you don't have those people in your life, but you could meet them at Manifest.

Like, I want people to walk out of Manifest feeling steady and empowered, not overstimulated, not like they've got to overhaul their entire life in the next 24 hours, just to be steady and empowered. That's all I want. I want them to walk out thinking, I can trust myself now. I want them to feel a little braver or a little clearer, a little less alone than they did when they first arrived. Like last year, what was it, something like 64% of attendees came on their own, and I made everyone stand up at the start. And the amount of people that said that they felt really fucking awkward doing that, but they did it anyway, it made them realize that they are not alone in that room. Because I'll be honest with you, like, life isn't suddenly going to become simple after just one event, is it? They're still going to have responsibilities, stress, family, work, doubt. But if they leave Manifest with a stronger relationship with themselves, then that changes how they handle all of it. And honestly, I want them to feel proud. Like, proud that they've backed themselves enough to show up for the event in the first place. Proud that they've invested in their growth. And that they've chosen expansion over comfort, because I think that decision alone just shifts something internally, doesn't it?

I reckon.

Yeah.

So who have you got speaking this year? Who are like your most exciting people you've got and what are they talking about?

So we've got this, um, quite unknown woman called Francesca Amber.

Oh, I've heard she's a slag.

I heard that as well, actually.

Yeah, I think it's true.

So we've got Francesca Amber, we've got Kimberley Gallagher.

Oh, talking about feng shui, I love Kimberley Gallagher. We just did her book in the book club.

We did. We've got Sarah Gregg and Jill Ritchie, who are the Intuitive Psychology Association. They are incredible. They mix science and woo-woo together. Absolutely incredible. We've got your beautiful friend, Tamu Thomas.

She is going to be speaking. Fucking love Tamu. If I could marry that woman, I would.

She said the same thing about you, actually.

Maybe Tammy Thomas is my secret love. I honestly, this is where I think sometimes single women should just live in commune. Like, imagine if we pooled our resources and we just lived in commune. We don't fuck each other or anything, but we just, we just, we just live together. And Tammy Thomas is genuinely one of the most inspirational people I have ever met in my life. I, I love her. Everything that she says, I'm just like God, that's so wise, let me write that down. Like, she just is gold. I love— oh my God, guys, go to Manifest purely for Tammy Thomas. She is incredible. What's she talking about?

I have no idea because she hasn't submitted anything to me yet.

Oh, whatever it is, it'll be amazing.

It's going to be absolutely incredible. Then we've got Estelle Bingham as well. Estelle is a manifestation coach. She is absolutely incredible. We've got Donna Elliott and Cheryl Reed from Now Is Your Time 2. They are a Newcastle-based manifestation duo, and honestly, I went to one of their away days and I had the most tears I've ever had in my entire life, the most breakthroughs and everything. And my business has flourished since then, since I went to that event in November. They've been on my podcast. They're absolutely incredible people. We've got Kate Harrison talking about color therapy and using color in terms of manifestation. And then we've got Poppy Delbridge as well, and Poppy's going to be doing, um, all of her rapid tapping sessions. We've got 12 workshops, we've got 60 exhibitors. Honestly, it's going to be such a fun-filled weekend because obviously last year we did it and it was all across one day and everyone was like, it was the most incredible day ever. I still feel empowered now from it, like, 8 months later. However, it was just one thing after another all day. It was like, there wasn't any— there was a couple of breaks, wasn't there? But it was just like bam, bam, bam, bam, bam., and then people leave feeling a little bit overwhelmed, and I didn't want that this year. So we've put it across 2 days so that people can come across the whole weekend, they can come for just 1 day, and honestly, it's going to be phenomenal. This year as well, we're including all the food and drink, and as well as that, there's going to be a Saturday night after-party. I can't wait for that.

Hello! Get excited!

Get excited! You love an after-party, don't you?

I do love an after-party, but I have got a feeling I'm flying to Tuscany early the next morning, so We have to see how late that afterparty goes on.

Yeah, I was going to say, I think you are flying to Tuscany. But I think in terms of choosing the speakers for Manifest, like, of course I look at people's experience, and of course I look at, you know, whether someone can hold a stage. But the first thing I was asking myself when I was booking these incredible speakers is, how do I personally feel when I listen to this person? Like, is it calmer, clearer, more expanded? Or do I feel slightly intimidated and like I need to upgrade myself? Because you can be a brilliant speaker on paper and you can still not be right for Manifest in terms of my eyes. So I've turned down people who are incredibly successful because something just didn't feel aligned with the tone of the day. But then I've also invited people who maybe aren't the loudest voice in the industry, or maybe people haven't heard of before, but they have this grounded, embodied practice. That shift something in the second that they speak. Like Kate Harrison, for example. You know, I heard her first on your podcast the other month, and I thought she would be incredible for Manifest, and so I reached out to her. And I also think about the audience constantly. Like, I ask myself, if someone is sat in that chair and they're doubting themselves, what kind of voice do they need to hear? Because it's not going to be someone who's 10 steps ahead and shouting behind them, is it? They want to listen to someone who remembers what it feels like to be exactly where they are right now, and they've walked in their shoes. And I think that's what matters to me most when I'm choosing these speakers. It's like a proper culmination of like everything that I would want out of a speaker.

Yeah, definitely. I'm excited. And what other things can we do there that are not the talks? Like what other workshops and stuff?

I was going to say, so there is some incredible workshops actually. You might want to go to some of these yourself, Fran.

Um, can I get priority booking please?

So the one that I think that you will enjoy the most is Jordie McLean is doing a pleasure-based healing workshop.

Absolutely not.

Make of that what you will.

What? Yeah, no, I'm not going to that. I don't want any pleasure, thank you. Stoicism all the way.

She's absolutely incredible.

So what, people just fingering themselves in a room?

I don't think they're going to be just fingering themselves in a room.

I'm not up for that.

You can watch the replay.

You could sell that on OnlyFans.

Yeah, um, but we've got a journaling workshop with Scribbles of Sanity. Karen Kaye, the Hay House author, is coming to talk all about fairy magic. That's something really unusual. We've got Karina Kusi doing a vision board studio. We've got breathwork from Laura Duffy. We've got Lakme Bambra doing Reiki healing, um, Sarah Darg is doing a witch school session, which is incredible because Sarah actually taught a couple of the witches that were on my podcast a few weeks ago. And every single witch, like, person that identifies as a witch that I speak to says, oh, you need Sarah Darg on your podcast. And I was like, well, actually, she's coming to Manifest, so she must be fucking incredible.

Oh, okay, I'm excited for that.

I'm very excited for that as well. Um, then we've got sound healing from Feel to Heal. We've got a hypnotherapy session from Elke, and the gorgeous Victoria Jackson is back again doing visualization. We've got Angie Sterling doing functional movement, and we've got Leah McKeague doing intuitive tarot as well. So we've got a wide range of, you know, workshops. Last year, I think we were supposed to have 4. We ended up amalgamating 2 of them together, the sound healing and the yoga, at the same time. And, um, yeah, it was just because of lack of space. This time we've got a dedicated room, so these are going to be running concurrently to the talks on the hour, every hour. Yeah, it's going to be absolutely incredible. I love it.

I'm literally packing my bags and I'm going. I'm so excited. I love Newcastle at the best of times. So I would love to ask you, because I was wondering this before we came on here, what has been like some of your weirdest manifestations recently? Is there anything, you know, where you're like, oh, 'Oh God, that's weird how that's happened.' Or like, while you're thinking, I'm just gonna say, because I like— because I just sprung that on you. I was sending a voice note to my friend the other morning, and it was about— it's basically me moaning about my dad. And I actually said to her, 'Right, I'm not gonna just moan about this to you. I do self-development work. I'm gonna do things differently. What have I learned in my self-development work? I need to say it to the person themselves in a really calm, communicated way. And I sent my dad a voice note saying basically, I'm not very happy. This kind of behavior is not acceptable in my life anymore, which is something that I have never ever done, ever ever. And as I hang up, as I stopped the voice note— not hung up the phone because I'm too much of a pussy to call— but as soon as I stopped the voice note, I actually thought to myself like, wow, that is how you know self-development is working, is when you see yourself responding to a situation in a way that you never have before. Like, you've always done something a certain way, and it does take conscious effort. It does take a decision to be like, hmm, maybe I need to respond to this in a different way. And as I thought that thought to myself, an old man leant out of his window across the field— I was walking my dog— and clapped out the window. And I was like, oh my God, the universe is clapping me. Like, what the fuck? And that's my weird thing recently that's happened to me. Like, so I just wanted— I just wondered if you've had any like weird manifestations or things that have like fallen together, or—

I don't think I've had any weird ones as such. I mean, in the last year I have managed to get 4.5 stone off me in weight. Now, I have been getting bigger and bigger every single year for the last— I'm gonna say 4 or 5 years— to the point that I started feeling uncomfortable in my clothes., and I would go in my wardrobe and I would pick something out and then like cover it up with like an overshirt or a jacket or something because I just hated me love handles. And I think about this point last year, I started working on self-love. And obviously can't talk about it fully for legal reasons, but I went on a TV show, and on this TV show I came across something that really triggered me, and it triggered like a stress response in me. And I think when I got home my first instinct was to just eat. And my partner went into hospital the night that I got home from 3 weeks away filming this TV show, and he was in hospital for 2 weeks, and I was just there, like, 3 weeks away from home to come home to suddenly be just chucked into looking after a child all over again every single day without a partner. And it was fucking intense. And I was ordering, like, Deliveroo and Uber Eats every single day just because I didn't get capacity to cook. And I put on like 3 and a half stone.

Wow.

And honestly, I just felt so uncomfortable. Like, when I look at photos of myself with you, or like talking like last year, I just felt so big. And I just, I just hate the way I look. Absolutely hated it. So I started working on self-love. And it was funny because I was out for a walk, I think it was around about October, November time. I was just walking me dog. And I sometimes just look up and talk to the universe. I always feel like if I look up, my words are going to get out to the universe quicker. I don't know why I do that. So anyway, I'm like looking up, walking along, and I just said, send me a sign that this, this is all down to, you know, self-development and self-love, and that if I nourish my body, I can lose this weight. And straight away, as soon as I'd said that, a bus went past, and on the side of it, I don't even know what was advertising, and said, "Yes, actually you can." And I just thought, "Oh my God, that bus has just talked to me." And I remember telling my mum and my partner about it and they were like, just looking at us as if I'm weird, 'cause I don't think anyone really gets it. But it's like you when you were saying that old man clapped out of the window.

Unless you've, it's like you're in communication with something you can't see. Yes. And when it responds, you know, like you do know, yeah, that bus talked to you. I know it said something weird. I believe it.

But it was like, as soon as I'd had that thought and I'd said, thank you, universe, blah, blah, blah. And I looked down, a bus went past and it said, yes, actually you can. And I was like, that is my answer. It just came within seconds. But I'm always telling people, you know, Pam Grout, E-Squared, I think the book is called, where it's like manifestation experiments that you can do at home. I always talk to people about— I think I did it in like episode 7 of my podcast about 4 and a half years ago. And I said to them, look out for a green car. And I'm sure you've told your audience to do this before.. And all of a sudden, our reticular activating system is looking everywhere for green cars, isn't it? Because it thinks that that needs to be our reality. So you start looking for this, and I swear to God, still to this day, I get daily messages from people saying, just listen to episode 7, guess what I saw? A green car. Don't see them all the time. And I'm like, is it all just coincidence? Because I don't believe in coincidences myself, but I'm thinking like Is it all coincidence, or is the universe talking to us directly, like the bus did to me, or the old man did to you?

I think it's a mixture of the two, but I do believe the, you know, the— well, not even believe, because the scientific part is there are millions of pieces of information at any moment, at any given time. And I think directing your energy to what you want to focus on, like, that is a scientific thing. But then I think there's another part where You can't explain it. And that's what I love about the universe and manifestation. I think we can all agree, whether you are Muslim, Christian, Catholic, whatever, there is something there. And did I tell you I found out what this was from a 25-year-old on Tinder? If you don't— if you are clever enough to be like, there's something there, but I don't know what it is, I can't call it Abraham and he's got long hair, or I can't call it Jesus, you're agnostic. You're not an atheist, you're agnostic. 25-year-old on Tinder taught me that. Then actually, like, we can all agree there is something, and we've all experienced that, where you have said something so specific in your mind and something— a bus, a house, a man clapping out the window, whatever— has responded. And you know that feeling. So when people say, like, they've talked to God, like, I can actually understand what they, what they mean. I always feel like this makes me sound mental, but When we did, um, a book in the book club, I think it's called Happy Home, I don't remember, and I was moving out of my old house, I felt very emotional about moving out of that house because I'd done very specific rituals when I'd moved in. And I'd moved in quite a poor beauty therapist who had like, was like about to get pregnant with twins, like did, like basically my whole life changed in that house, my whole fortune changed in that house. So I was very grateful to it. And when I left, the day that I left, I wrote it, this whole letter, just like basically crying, writing this letter saying like, thank you so much, like you've provided shelter for me and my children, like you've been a base for me to change my life, like without this house I would not have been able to do it. And I was like crying writing it, and I threw it up in the loft so the new owners hopefully wouldn't find it. And as I came down, I just sort of sat in my dressing room and I was just sitting there and I was God, I just— I'm just so grateful to this house. And as I said it, the lights flashed on and off 3 times. The house had never had a power cut in all the time I'd lived there. It had never had flickering lights. It had never ever done that before. Now you can't convince me that wasn't— and this is the thing where it is very agnostic— is, is it Jesus? Is it Allah? Is it the soul of the house itself? You know, in Shinto in Japan they do believe that homes have souls and that inanimate objects do have souls. So was it the soul of the house? I don't fucking know. And also it doesn't really matter. But what I know is that that house responded to me, and in that moment I was like, oh my God, I'm having a convo with a semi-detached. Like, it's wild. Um, but it's incredible to have that two-way relationship, and I think that anyone that is on their manifesting journey and at the moment it feels very one-way. It's you in control, you're in 100% control. You will get to a point where you do need to surrender a little bit and be in a two-way relationship with this whatever it is, universe, whatever you want to call it. And it's beautiful because you do get to hand over the reins a little bit. You do get to converse and you do get to have trust as well. I think that's another thing is like not always knowing what is the best for you right now, and actually knowing that if something is really pushing you hard in one direction, it's actually the universe saying, just go this way for a bit, like, just trust me, it will all become clear.

Yeah, you've just got to have that trust and that faith that you are on the highest path for your highest good if you're taking the right actions.

I don't think you're always on the highest path for your highest good. I think there's times in my life maybe where I was just bumbling along and not really doing any of the work and not really being conscious with my thoughts, and that probably wasn't my highest path. But I think when you are, you know that, that dance, don't you, of like when you're doing too much and when you're doing too little. So anyway, sorry, back to the weight loss. So, so what did you do differently then?

I just worked on self-love. That's it, really, all it came down to. So I would do these little self-love practices at the start of every single morning. So whether it just be looking at myself in the mirror, staring into my eyes while I said my affirmations, that was one thing that I did. Another one was kind of— I called it somatic dance, but anyone that's a somatic dance coach or, you know, someone that works in somatics will be like, that isn't somatics. So I would literally just put on like a drumming noise, close my eyes, and just let my body move from side to side, or my arms go a bit round, a bit like what we did at, you know, Susie Ashworth's workshop in London. Can you remember that?

Terrible time. Terrible time.

You hated every second, but we were— me and Jay were flinging ourselves everywhere, weren't we? Yeah. Um, but yeah, just doing little activities like that, or writing yourself a love note. You know, listening to subliminals around self-love and dressing for the life that you want, just things like that. And every single day I just felt like I'm actually starting to care about my body now. And I started thinking about like 10, 20 years in the future, do I want to be a morbidly obese dad that can't even like get down on the floor to play with his kid or can't play football?

Yeah.

And I kept on bringing it back to that, and I kept on thinking like, I have so much fun with Jake, my son, at the moment just running around or just playing with them at the park or chasing them around the house. And it's like, I wouldn't be able to do that if I didn't put my body first and if I didn't nourish it with the right foods, or just even a little bit of walking. Like what even you did, you did Step Into Abundance in January, didn't you? The amount of people in that WhatsApp group that were saying, you know, my step count has tripled, or my step count has quadrupled. And it's almost like people just need that little container to be able to focus on something other than everything else that's going on around them, to just focus inwards and focus on yourself for a change, because it can make a massive difference. So I did— the changes that I made weren't actually like that drastic. I just started thinking about how I was moving on a day-to-day basis rather than sitting there on the couch with me laptop, just thinking about, you know, getting out for half an hour a day, just thinking about cooking food rather than ordering it in. Just little things like even drinking water. It would get to the point of like 7 o'clock on a night and I was thinking, God, I haven't even ate today, I haven't drank any water or anything. So now I'm just setting myself little phone reminders like every 2 or 3 hours, remember to eat, remember to drink. And I know that sounds really, really stupid, but when you're busy and you've got other things going on, sometimes it's the least of your worries.

I, I never need to be reminded to eat ever. Constantly my brain is like, when are we next dated? When are we next? I never ever forget to eat. Sometimes I don't have time to eat, but I've never forgotten.

See, sometimes I just forget and I just keep on thinking like, oh my God, I haven't ate since yesterday. Like right now I'm sat here, it's 20 to 12, and I haven't ate since last night. But I know straight after this I need me breakfast slash dinner. Um, but yeah, I just forget to eat sometimes, and I think that's not looking after my body, do you know what I mean? So yeah.

I think what you're saying about like, I think there's such a difference between how I used to try and— because I feel like now I'm probably at my healthiest I've been in a really, really long time, but also sustainably so. Like, not just, oh, you've lost weight for a holiday. And I feel like when I was in my 20s or maybe even my 30s as well, I'd be like, right, I want to lose weight and look great for my book launch or for a holiday or for whatever. And as soon as I turned 40, I was like, God, I just want— I don't even want to lose weight. I just want to be strong and I want to be fit and I want to be healthy. Not even for my daughters, but for my grandchildren. Like, I'm already starting to think about my grandchildren, which is why I think I got so pissed off with my dad the other day. He let down my children twice in a row, and I was like, when I'm a grandparent, I hope I will not act this way. But I, I, I'm already thinking like I want to be fit and strong and able. Bitch, I've got plans, right? I'm a single mum of 3 children, and at the moment I do feel a little bit like grounded— like, not grounded, but I'm in a very safe area. I'm in a very lovely area to raise children. They're all at school. There's a lot of logistics when it comes to having 3 children. But when they grow up and move out, which, let's be honest, right, I've got a dog now because I was working it out when she'd die and I'd be free and everyone will have moved out, and then I'll experience that next phase of my life, which will be like empty nest syndrome. Home. Like, I've got plans. I'm traveling the fucking world. I'm meeting the love of my life. I'm probably moving back to London. I'm gonna be probably having like some sort of career change. Like, there will be shit going on, and I want to be fit and well enough to enjoy that part of my life. Like, I don't want my children to move out and then me just be a shriveled up little husk of a woman, because that's not in my life plan. And I think when you approach it from that way rather than— right, so an example, just being total transparency. So the other day I went to reformer Pilates. I fucking love reformer Pilates. It's one of the best things I've ever done. I go once a week. I adore it. And I came out and I straight away had a McDonald's breakfast. And someone— it might have been you, or you might have liked it.

It was me.

You were like, that's fucking cancelled it out. And I was like, but it hasn't. It hasn't cancelled it out. If you were looking at calories, yeah, it's cancelled it out. But I'm not looking at calories. I'm looking at, have I just gone and moved my body? Worked my muscles in a way that I never thought I could and kept my body strong and supple? Yeah, I have. And it kind of doesn't matter if you've eaten more calories, you know what I mean? It's not for the weight loss, it's not for how I look. I mean, obviously I want to try and look young and hot and skinny, but it's just about being consistently active now. And I tell you, the best thing I've done, the best fucking thing I've done, is get a dog. Yeah, that has literally changed my life. I now walk for over an hour every day. That is something I could never have been consistent with. I don't suggest people go and get a dog for that reason, but yeah, it's been amazing. Anyway, I just, just really happy about that. Anyway, I feel like we've talked for quite a long time now. So I was going to ask you one final question.

Mm-hmm.

And this is, what do you think is the one thing that is holding you back from achieving your dreams right now?

Oh, what do I think the one thing? I think it's meself.

That's too vague.

What do you mean it's too vague?

What aspect of yourself?

I think I get in my own head sometimes because, you know, if I think about running Manifest, for example, right, I often think about like how it stretched me or how it's kind of, you know, pulled me in so many different directions and Like, there's been times where I've sat on the end of my bed at 3 AM after letting me dog out thinking, oh my God, I've still got Manifest tickets to sell. Oh my God, like, this is coming up in 3 months' time. And I think it's definitely stretched my capacity for pressure. But I'm someone who talks about alignment and nervous system regulation on a day-to-day basis, but then I kind of fail to practice that myself. And I think I'll just talk about it so, so much, and then I think, God, I've got so much on my plate. How am I supposed to do this myself? But yet I've had so many evenings where I've been sat there with a spreadsheet open thinking, God, this is a lot, isn't it? And as you know yourself, Fran, like, financial risk stretches you and it puts pressure on you, doesn't it? Having that responsibility for everyone to have an incredible time stretches you. Being seen by the audience stretches you. And I think there's a difference between teaching confidence and actually embodying it when there's something on the line. Like, I've had to work through in the last 12 months so much of my own scarcity mindset again, and my own fear of visibility, my own need to control outcomes. And I think Run and Manifest, that's really held up a mirror to every single area where I still play small in my life, and that's really uncomfortable. And I think that's what kind of holds me back every now and again. But on the flip side of that, it is also quite freeing, because I think every time I choose to lean into that discomfort instead of shrinking back you grow from it, don't you? And I think that's important to say because growth doesn't— it doesn't feel like a motivational quote. It feels like doubt and courage coexisting at the same time. Like, if you're listening to this right now and you're waiting to feel 100% confident before you take a leap, you're going to be waiting forever. Like, I didn't feel ready. I just felt the fear and decided to expand anyway. But I think that's what kind of holds me back from my next level life it's my own fear of visibility, my own need to control outcomes, because I am a fucking massive control freak, don't get us wrong. And it's kind of that scarcity mindset. But as Denise Duffield-Thomas always says, like, what is it? New level, old devil.

New level, new devil.

New level— I think it's new level, old devil.

It's as you reach a new level, there's gonna be something new that's gonna come up. Like, you— it's people People that think like, oh God, if I just like had £10,000 in my bank, or if I just had 10 clients, like my problems would go away. And then when they get 10 clients or £10,000, then actually they've got new problems. It's like, oh right, you've reached the VAT threshold, or you've now got to deal with, do you know what I mean? Like it's every time you level up, there's new things to deal with.

I thought it was new level, old devil, as in terms of like every time you reach a new level, all of this old shit is gonna keep coming forward.

We need Denise Stafford-Thomas to clarify this for us.

Yes, but it is, it's so true. Every time you reach that new peak of your life and you think, amazing, everything's grown for me, all of a sudden that self-doubt creeps in, doesn't it? And I mean, what are your self-doubt concerns at the moment, Fran?

Oh my, self-doubt, well, I don't know. So the book we're doing in the book club at the moment, although when this comes out it won't be, is Believe You're Made for More, which is steps to transform your self-esteem. And that has been very illuminating and very freeing because I think you realize that a lot of people have very similar, uh, self-esteem issues and very similar things that we all grow up for one reason or another feeling like we're not enough for whatever reason. So that's been very like freeing going through that. But in terms of like holding me back, I've genuinely— and this is going to sound really— but the book that we're doing, again, when this comes out, it's probably the book that we are doing, Is My Phone I really think— and do you know what, people hate it. Maybe I'll talk about this at Manifest. People hate it when I talk about it, but it's like we do now have this thing in our life which is hijacking our lives, like, and people don't want to hear it. They really don't want to hear it. But it's like your most valuable commodity is your time and your energy. Like, we've worked that out. Like, people are no longer trying to break in your house house and steal your furniture. Like, they don't want your old CDs, they don't give a shit. That's not your most valuable thing. They're coming in your house and you're letting them, and they're stealing the most valuable thing you have— hours of your time and energy. If you think about what we're able to create in our lives with the time and energy we have, right? When you wake up in the morning, your energy is usually at its biggest, at its best. Yeah, you've probably got 4 hours of good, solid energy. You could create a podcast, you could write a book, you could write a song, you could do all these things, right, that could better your life. But instead, so many people are instead trading that energy to somebody who is harvesting it. They're harvesting our energy, our children's energy. And it terrifies me because I don't berate myself for it because I realize that I'm up against a multi-billion dollar industry that is designed to make us addicted. I also recognise that we are the very first people. We're the guinea pigs. We've never had to experience this before. So I don't ever berate myself or shame myself for it. But it is something that I recognise that is preventing me from achieving my goals and dreams. So hopefully by the time this comes out, I'm halfway through. Well, this book, How to Break Up with Your Phone, and I'm like fucking free from the shackles of social media and your phone. And that's not to say that I'm not going to be using it, but it's using it in a way where I'm in control. Yeah, not them. Because do you ever feel like sometimes you're sitting scrolling, you're like, I want to break away, but I, I physically can't?

Yeah, it's something that I don't want to pass down, uh, my child as well, because like I use my phone a lot in business, you know. I'm in all these different business WhatsApp groups, I'm in Facebook groups, I use my phone for a lot of my business, but it's the fact that sometimes I can think, right, I need to go on Instagram and post this reel. I go on Instagram, I open it up, and the first post is something funny, and I'm like, haha, I'm going to send that to Fran. So then I'll send that post to you or one of my other friends, and then all of a sudden, before I know it, I'm scrolling. Yeah, unintentionally scrolling. And I am literally doom scrolling. Like, I've got— my mind just goes blank and I can't even remember why I'd opened my phone in the first place. Now, if you've got an iPhone, there's an app called Screen Time in your settings. It shows you how many times you open your phone, how much time you spend on certain apps. And I showed you this last month as well, Fran. I was disgusted. There was one day I'd opened my phone over 700 times in one day. And in that one day, in that 24-hour period, I don't even know how this is possible, but it said I'd spent 22.5 hours on WhatsApp.

I don't know how that's possible.

I think, well, I didn't have much sleep that day and I was in the WhatsApp group for Step Into Abundance, um, for my own courses and my business workshops. And sometimes if I've got my phone on do not disturb, I'm scared of missing WhatsApp. So sometimes I just leave the screen open on WhatsApp so I can see when messages actually come through without getting a notification for it. So yeah, it's something that I desperately need to do. If I sit on the couch on a night and I— the second I open my phone and a TikTok or an Instagram starts starts playing, my little boy is like, his eyes just pop and he comes running over and he wants to know what it is. And then he stands there over the top of my phone and he's almost like making a scrolling gesture. And I'm like, I do not want to get you addicted to screens like this at such a young age. You are 2 years old. So like whenever I can, I'll take him over the table and, you know, we've got like this doodle mat where you put water in the pens and he can like like, you know, draw and things like that. And he's got Play-Doh sets, he's got books. I do not want him to grow up the same as we kind of have because obviously phones and technology like this didn't really, it didn't really come about until I probably was in secondary school or college, you know, when you could actually start accessing the internet on your phones. But I see my cousin's children right now and they are like under the age of 10. And they've got mobile phones and they're taking them to school and they are sitting in their lessons like playing Roblox and things. And I'm like, I just don't get it.

They're hijacked. They're completely hijacked.

Yeah, they are.

And you know what pisses me off is like, so Bo isn't allowed a phone and I've told her she's not getting a phone until she goes to senior school. For me, ideally it would be 13, but I don't think I'm gonna get away with that. I think year 7, I think most of them do. But she's recently started walking herself to school, not often, probably she's done it 2 or 3 times. And I went into the school and I said, look, she's year 5, but she's like, you know, Bo, she's like an adult. She's like not a silly 9-year-old. She's very intelligent and very sensible. And I said, so is this like illegal? Like, am I— is she allowed to— what's the deal here? Because I've been having a few problems with one of the other girls, and sometimes Bo just wants to just get out in the morning and go, and that was going to be best for her. And she said, well, it's completely fine. She said, especially where you live, like, she doesn't have to cross the road, like, it's absolutely fine. Um, she said sometimes people will buy their children a phone at that point to say that they've got to school okay. And I just thought, absolutely fucking not. And I think it's all about risk and reward, right? So what are the risks that Beau walking herself to school, a 5-minute walk, is she really— is something going to happen where she needs a phone versus what are the chances that she's going to become addicted to that device? I would rather take my chances. And I know that some people will be like, but when we were children, we didn't have mobile phones. Yeah, I didn't phone my mum to say I got to school okay. Like, what the fuck? And so she says to me, like, well, what's the difference? I have an iPad. And I'm like, the difference is not all screens are created equally. And this is something I feel very passionately about as well, is like, not all screens are equal. If you have an iPad, it's got a big massive rubber case on it. The— they're putting away in a cupboard, and she's allowed it like once a week. When you have a phone, the very nature of a phone is it's portable. All of a sudden, your child is now able to access all the stuff they could have seen on an iPad. A special treat, you get to have your iPad for an hour. They can look at it in the car, they can look at it in a shop, they can look at it wherever they are. Absolutely not. Not on my fucking watch. I think as well, like, if the twins want to sit down and watch TV that is very, very different to them sitting and scrolling on their iPads because there they can tap away, tap away, tap away. What's the next thing? On TV, if they want to change what they're watching, and it's also long-form content as well, I think that's very important for like the, uh, attention span and everything, they've got to then consult with other people. Is it okay if we come out of this and watch something else? It's a completely different beast. And I just, I don't know, I hope that this book is going to help me get a grasp of it myself because I know with children, whatever you model model. Like, what is it, monkey see, monkey do, or whatever. Like, you— there's no point telling your child, oh, you play with that painting and I'm gonna sit on my phone. Like, I have to model the change and I have to be in charge. And yes, I still want to have a business on my phone, I still want to have a social media presence, I still want to enjoy social media, but I want it to be very much on my terms, not those fuckers. Hate them.

Yeah, I agree 100%.

Anyway, we've rambled for long enough. This has turned into an hour. Oh Jesus. Anyway, thank you so much for coming on. I'm gonna leave a link down below for people to be able to get Manifest tickets. Um, is it— can you buy a one-day ticket or is it just a two-day thing?

Yeah, so the website is www.manifest.uk, or if you prefer, you can follow me on Instagram You can either type in Manifest Newcastle, or you can type in mani.fest.nuc, short for Newcastle, N-E-W-C. The link is in the bio. Or if you come and follow me, I'm @cannycrystals or @marttweedey, and the link is in all of those social media profiles. This year's event is across 2 days on Saturday the 13th and Sunday the 14th of June 2026. You can see the full lineup of both days on the main stage, all the workshops, and grab your tickets on the website right now. But if you can't make it to Newcastle upon Tyne, you can even grab a virtual ticket and you can watch the livestream as it unfolds. Last year we had people come from LA, South Africa, Australia. It was wild how far that people had travelled to come and join us. And the feedback forms that we sent out were all insanely positive. I think the only concerns that people had was that there wasn't enough food vans at lunchtime. And that the venue was too hot in the afternoon because the sun was blaring through the windows. But we fixed all that. We moved to a bigger venue with aircon this year, and we've got catering company to provide every attendee with a lunch on both days as well. Oh, and with every ticket purchase, like I mentioned earlier, you also get access to the Saturday evening afterparty as well. So that is going to be so much fun. Also, if you've got a small business or you want to be in our exhibitor hall selling your own services or let me know. Just click on Exhibitors from the main menu and you can fill in the form. But yeah, check out the speakers, the workshops, all the rest on the website www.mani-fest.uk. There are less than 100 tickets remaining. Last year we sold out completely with just a few weeks till the event, and so many people were messaging me about tickets and I literally couldn't do anything to help anyone because we're at full capacity. So, don't let that be you this year. Get your tickets on the website right now. You can even spread the cost with our payment plans if that helps you. And I will see you all in June.

Oh, can I bring my gratitude necklaces and sell them?

Yes. Have I still got them?

No, I've got them. But I actually really want to do— I actually want a stall. Like, I just want to sit there and be like, "Hello! Come and meet me!" You might have an honesty box.

At the end of the day, you could bring copies of your book if you wanted to, and you can sell and sign your books. A few people are doing that as well. A few speakers.

Oh yeah, I could do, could I?

Having a little book signing, yeah.

Oh, okay, yeah, I will do that then, actually.

Because guaranteed, like, as big as you are, like, even last year, as big as Kirstie Gallagher is, there were still people in the room that had no idea who Kirstie Gallagher was.

Yeah, so, okay, right, I'll bring my books, I'll bring my books, my necklaces, some items I'm gonna stick on Vinted, uh, your old knickers. Thank you so much for coming on. It's been lovely to speak to you. I say this like I'm not going to hang up and immediately speak to you on WhatsApp, but for everyone else, lovely to speak to you. And bitches, I'll see you next week. The Law of Attraction has changed my life, and guess what? It's going to change yours too, bitch. Bye!