Why your goals feel small #motivation #manifestation

11 Oct 2026 · 2 min

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2:06

In this motivational coaching segment, Paridhi Dhingra helps a participant (Speaker B) explore why they often compare their goals to others and feel their ambitions are either too small or too large. Paridhi explains that such comparisons arise from a lack of clarity about one's emotional purpose— the underlying feeling a goal is meant to satisfy— rather than the material outcome itself. Using the example of choosing a government job for stability versus a private job for higher income, she shows how the true goal is the feeling of security, not the job title. Once the emotional purpose is identified, the participant can answer external pressures (e.g., why not take a private job) by referencing that purpose, reducing the urge to compare and making goal‑setting more authentic. The dialogue emphasizes shifting focus from material goals to emotional motivations to achieve clarity and confidence in personal decisions.

Chapters

So let me clarify your question again. Your question is, when I look at my friends or other people, I compare my goals with their goals, and sometimes I wonder whether I'm making very small goals or whether I'm making too big goals.
Yes.
And then sometimes I try to minimize my goals, or sometimes I try to maximize my goals. Correct?
Yes.
Whenever we compare our life with other people, it's because we do not have clarity of our emotional purpose in life. Because When you want a goal, it's like a physical thing that you want in your life, like a government job or a relationship or a career or some financial goal that you have. But it has a specific material goal, correct? Now, you don't want what you want only for that one material reason. You want it because it makes you feel something. Example, getting a government job will make you feel what?
It will make me feel stable.
Okay. So your goal is not a government job. Your goal is what?
To be— to become stable in life.
To feel secured. To feel— having a stable job is basically you want to feel a sense of security. Whenever you compare yourself with other people, the reason is you are not clear about your emotional purpose of life. But once you get clear about your emotional purpose of life, you will never compare yourself with other people because now you're not comparing a goal. You're not comparing a material goal. Now you are focused on your goal as what? Emotional purpose. Now, if somebody suddenly asks you, why aren't you doing a private job? What's your answer now after I've had this conversation with you?
Uh, I'll say because it doesn't serve my purpose.
See, now you're not comparing yourself with other people. I won't be able to confuse you that, hey, I am in a private job, you should also do a private job. Why are you not doing a private job? It gives you more money.
But
you'll say,
see, now
you'll be like, that's fine, I know it has more money, but it doesn't have enough stability. I'm not looking for more money right now. I'm not looking for higher growth right now. I'm looking for stability right now. Maybe later in my life I'll look for growth. For now, I'm looking for stability. Because you're clear about your emotional purpose, nobody can confuse you.