In this solo podcast episode, Stand Sure Coaching founder Rob Anderson reflects on his evolving relationship with winter and uses the four seasons as a metaphor for life’s cycles. He shares personal anecdotes—from wilderness survival training to scuba diving and coaching veterans—to illustrate how each season (winter, spring, summer, fall) offers distinct lessons: resilience, renewal, expansion, and reflection. Anderson introduces Martin Seligman’s PERMA model of well‑being (Positive emotion, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, Accomplishment) and the concept of learned optimism, explaining how these positive‑psychology frameworks can help clients navigate seasonal challenges such as career loss, relationship transitions, and PTSD. He then offers five concrete life‑hacks (savoring moments, journaling, seasonal rituals, daily reflection questions, and optimistic reframing) and promotes a 6‑month journaling class and a Patreon community where listeners can access deeper content and coaching tools. Throughout, he emphasizes intentional living, purpose‑driven coaching, and the importance of embracing every season rather than fleeing from hardship.
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Hey, welcome to Stand Sure Coaching. This is the podcast for Stand Sure Coaching. I'm Rob Anderson, and today I want to talk about something that has been a real struggle for me over the years, and that's winter. And not just the season itself, but what winter Oftentimes represents in life. And I'm going to show how my relationship with it has changed over the years and how I've come to see each season— winter, spring, summer, and fall— and seeing those as a teacher. Then we're going to explore positive psychology and how it can help us embrace those seasons with purpose. And I'll be honest with you, I think for the most part, winter has always been tough for me. Growing up in Arizona, growing up in Texas. You know, a lot of you know that I used to teach wilderness survival. And when I was teaching survival, winter wasn't so much of a problem. I had systems. Build a fire, construct a shelter, you know, kept moving. The cold wasn't the enemy. It was more of a challenge. And because I had tools to manage it and I had a purpose, there were times I actually thrived in it. But as I came back into scuba diving and I was growing Neptune Warrior out, and scuba was really where I was finding a lot of peace for myself, and as that practice began to grow, things shifted. My, my winters weren't spent in the backcountry anymore. They were spent Indoors, in pools, planning trips, going on trips. And the long dark days started to really weigh in on me when I couldn't do those activities. And I dreaded the cold months. And I realized— and this is recent— I realized if I keep resisting this season, I'm going to miss out on big parts of my life because then I'm only living for the summer. And I think in the past couple of weeks, as the days are getting shorter, shadows are growing longer, it takes a while for the sun to rise. The sun sets really early. I, I had to have this turning point. I've had to learn to embrace each season, both literally and figuratively. Because life is too short to keep pushing away whole chapters. And for me, it's been waiting for 1/4 of the year. And where I live in Idaho, it's not even really a 4th. I mean, we have a really, really short summer here. So as I look at the seasons of life, each one teaches us something important. And what I've come to find is that winter Winter is about resilience. It's, it's time to rest, reflect, and prepare. Springtime is about renewal. It's new beginnings. It can be messy, but it's full of growth. Summer, energy, joy, expansion. And fall, like we're coming into right now, is a reflection. It's harvesting the lessons. Practicing gratitude and preparing for the cycle ahead. Now, by the way, over on the Stan Shore Coaching Patreon page, if you become a subscriber over there, I've got I've got some life hacks over there for you, and I've got a video version of parts of this podcast. What I find is that if we continue to fight against these rhythms. We miss the wisdom of each season, but yet if we embrace them, life can become richer. And you know, as you look at each one of these seasons, there's a lot of times we go through winters. I've been going through a winter in the past several months with, you know, with career changes and things like that. I work with people every single day that when they contact me, They are in the deepest, darkest days of winter. They have lost a job. They have to change a career. They've lost a pet. They're in a transition in their relationship. They just got out of a relationship. And that's winter for them. My job isn't to just throw spring right back onto them. It's to work through that winter process So that when spring does get there, and it's all about renewal and new beginnings, that they are prepared for growth. And the same thing right now as we're coming into fall. My job as a coach is to help someone look at the lessons that they've learned. How do they prepare to carry forward? Taking those times of reflection. Harvesting the lessons, finding gratitude of where they're at right now. I've got a couple of clients that have just come out of some really, really seasons of heartaches, finding the wrong people, not being valued. All those are seasons of life. Same thing with people who were, you You know, who've been laid off or fired. I work with people who, you know, one minute they're riding the magic carpet, the next, the rug is ripped out from underneath them. But in each one of those seasons, there is wisdom. And this is where positive psychology comes in. I've talked about this over on my other podcast, One Dive at a Time, but I'm going to introduce it here. I think this is probably one of the first times I've ever introduced positive psychology on this podcast. And it's from Martin Seligman. He's the father of modern positive psychology. And what he was able to do is shift the focus from what's wrong with us to what makes life worth living. I know a lot of you that are hearing this podcast today, you've come from a bad relationship, a toxic boss, a toxic work environment. We have to stop looking at what's wrong with us, and we have to start looking at what makes life worth living. In his work, he created what was called the PERMA model. It's the five pillars of well-being. I'll make sure that I post these over on the Patreon page this week. First one. Again, PERMA model. First one, P, positive emotion. Finding joy, gratitude, and hope even in the small moments. This is why journaling is so important. This is why I'm excited about the journaling class. I've got a 6-month journaling class that I'm fixing to launch. And one of the things that excites me about that is that there is opportunities to write down, to track, Where you're finding joy, what's bringing you gratitude, and even looking at those small moments. Because at some points you have to be able to look back, and this is why journaling is so important, why you have to be able to look back and see where you've grown and remind yourself of the things that you should be grateful for. Engagement, being fully absorbed in activities That bring you alive. For me, a lot of you know that's scuba diving. It's also getting out to the— it's out— it's also getting out to the woods. Those things fully absorb me. If you're coming out of a relationship where you have been codependent, or you're— that no one sees you for what your value is, I've got a couple of clients right now that honestly, they were getting used. They're getting used for their body. You have to find something that brings you out and makes you fully alive. And that leads us right into relationships, building strong, supportive connections, not, not just those very shallow relationships, not just those relationships that's, that's, that, you know, now it— there are people who are into, in, in the different types of relationships, and I'm not, I'm not going to comment on that because that's, that's not what this podcast is about. But if you're a person who needs a deeper relationship and you keep finding shallow relationships That's where we need to talk. Because we need to help you. I need to partner with you in a way that helps you see where your value is, set some goals, set some parameters, set some barriers. But part of that PERMA model is building those strong, supportive— that should be in great big capital bolded letters— supportive connections. Meaning understanding your why. And by the way, your why may change. For me, 20 years ago, It was all about helping men become in tune with them, with their masculine selves. And that's still part of the mission I have. But at that point in time, 2003 to 2008, I was very much about helping men find why they're wired, how they're wired, and help them and Having a battle to fight, the right battle to fight, the beauty to rescue. Later on, it became about helping veterans and preventing veteran suicide. And today, even though those missions still mean a lot to me, and they're part of what I do today, and they are part of my why. My why has changed a little bit. But understanding what your why is and what your deeper purpose is, that is one of the things I really love to do in my coaching practice. I've got a client right now that's just— I mean, it's like the light bulb has turned on for them. The skies have opened because they finally understand what their purpose is. And now, they've got something that they drive towards. And the last part there is accomplishment, recognizing growth and celebrating wins. Big wins, small wins, all wins. What's powerful about PERMA is that it helps us navigate every season. In wintertime, we're leaning on those relationships. And we're leaning on what our purpose is, that meaning. In spring, we seek engagement. Summer, we savor those positive emotions. And fall, like we're coming into right now, we acknowledge what those accomplishments are. You know, Seligman also emphasized learned optimism. I've got somebody in my life right now that Really struggles with being optimistic. We have to find ways to reframe setbacks as something that is just, it's just temporary. It's a season, right? It's part of the season. But we have to reframe setbacks as temporary, specific, and external instead of something that defines us. And this is where our work with people who are going through PTSD, managing PTSD. You don't get over it, but it's managing PTSD, understanding how to reframe that and not let it define you. That shift alone can change How we experience the tough seasons. So let me give you some life hacks. Now, over on the Patreon page, I've got 4 life hacks. For the podcast, I decided to do 5 because I'm including PERMA in there. Number 1, savor the moment, even in wintertime. Light a candle, notice the warmth of that candle, and take in the quiet. Now, whether that is a figurative candle Metaphorical, maybe it's an actual candle, but find that candle in your life and be okay to take in the quiet. Perfect journaling time, right? Which leads me to the next one. Journal through your seasons. Write down your struggles, write down the joys, write down where you see growth, write down the things that you're grateful for, write out your plans. And I guarantee you, and we'll talk about this in that journaling workshop that I want that we're going to do. I guarantee that you will see growth that later on you might have missed. Number three, create seasonal rituals. For me, that means redefining winter. With habits that nourish me. For you, it could look it could look completely different, and each season needs its own rituals. Number four, and again, I'm going to list this over on my Patreon page. So patreon.com/stanshorecoaching. Ask yourself daily, did I experience joy? Did I engage deeply? Did I connect with someone? Did I live with purpose and accomplish something small? Number 5, reframe with optimism. I can't stress this one enough. Instead of, Yeah, this season will never end, which I'm guilty of. Say, hey, this season is temporary and it's shaping me for what's next. Man, I cannot believe how the time has flown for me the past few years because I've been focused only on summer. I got to get back in there. You got to get back in there and really start living each season With intent. Hey, here's the truth. Life moves too quickly to wish any of it away. Every season matters. Winter builds resilience, spring sparks growth, summer expands joy, and fall gathers wisdom. For me, my mission is to help you stand strong in every single season of life. Not avoiding the hard times, but finding the lessons and the growth inside each of them. Hey, if this message resonates with you, I would love to invite you to join me over on Patreon. That's patreon.com/stansurecoaching. There you're going to find daily motivation, Practical coaching tools and encouragement to help you navigate your own seasons with strength and confidence. Thank you so much for being here with me today. Stand sure, embrace your season, keep moving forward one step at a time.
