Episode 75: The Mountain

You know, there are some days that it feels like you're carrying this 100-pound pack around and you're headed up in the mountains. It's uphill the entire way. You're exhausted, you're frustrated, and you're wondering, is all the effort worth it? And before you quit, I want you to listen to this. Hey, welcome to Stand Sure Coaching. My name is Rob Anderson. I'm your host of the Stand Sure Podcast. Hey, my journey has been defined by 3 distinct chapters. Chapter 1 began with my time in the military, where I learned the true meaning of leadership and resilience in some of the most high-pressure environments. Then on to Chapter 2, I transitioned into corporate America, serving as a learning and development professional and leadership coach for Fortune 500 companies. Now, I'm in my third chapter dedicated to helping men navigate their own transitions, rediscover their purpose, and find what it means to lead with conviction in their second half of life. Hey, in this episode, I want to share 3 practical strategies that are going to help you keep moving When life feels heavy and why rest is just not the same as quitting and how the strongest people, they're not the ones who never struggle. They're the ones who refuse to stay down. And I get this, man. I am fighting this right now on all kinds of fronts. A lot of you know that the podcast, they come from one of two areas, either Things I've been putting in my journals because it's things that I've had to go through or I'm going through or I see it in my clients. So today, I want to talk to the person that's carrying the heavy pack. It's metaphorical, you know. I mean, it's not a hiking pack. I guess that could also be true. But I'm talking about the invisible pack, the one that's filled with stress, responsibility, setbacks, disappointments, finance pressure, relationship struggles, health concerns. You know, all— how about all those expectations that either others or yourself have placed on you? And Y'all, if this is you today, this is your message. Everybody has tough days. There are some days, man, I don't know about you, but there's days I wake up, I'm energized, I'm ready to take on the world. And other days it feels like I'm climbing a mountain and I've got like 100 pounds of gear. And every step takes more effort. Every decision I have to do, it feels heavier. What happens is, you know, the mistake that all of us make is believing that those hard days mean that they're failing. I mean, you've been there. You've had the days where it just absolutely sucks to be you. But I'm gonna tell you what, embrace the suck. Because the hard days, those are part of the journey. If you've ever watched a long-distance hiker or a mountaineer or someone that's trekking through difficult terrain, Whether you've seen this in person, seen it on a video, you're gonna notice something interesting. They don't sprint the entire trail. They don't attack every mountain at full speed. They stop. They rest. They adjust their pack. They might change their socks. Tighten up the boots. They take a moment, they drink water, they catch their breath, and then they keep moving. The goal is progress. So today I'm going to share 3 things with you that have helped me and many of the people that I've worked with when life starts feeling heavy. And this is a major part of my work. If you're listening to this right now and you're feeling this, this is the area that I specialize in. This is where I work. Tip number one: focus on the next step, not the entire mountain. I can remember hikes I've done, and I can talk about different types of circumstances. I can talk about when I got lost in the desert. I can talk about. My military experience when I was doing road marches. I can talk about the other day when I started to— so very quickly, I have a lifestyle change I have to make immediately. And so I started running again. And for me, it was literally all about the The next step, not the entire run. In our case, since we're using a hiker or a trekker, tip number 1, focus on the next step, not the entire mountain. You see, most people, they don't get overwhelmed because of what they're doing today. They get overwhelmed because of what's occurring tomorrow, the next week, the next month, the next year. They're doing it all at the same time. Y'all, when I was going through the tactical diver course, and it has a very high attrition rate, I would just make myself the deal that I was going to get up in the morning, I was going to make my bed, get my gear ready, stow away my locker, make sure that my room was squared away, either get out to the PT field Or get out to the pool, actually get into formation to go to the PT field or to the pool. And I would just start setting goals. I'm gonna make it to lunch. No matter everything that they threw at me, I was gonna make it to lunch. And then after lunch, we'd go back for bone-crushing PT. We'd go back for— Lunch. Hours on the water, getting harassed, having a hose shoved inside your mask, feeling like you're drowning, feeling like air was a, you know, was a luxury item. But I tell myself I'm gonna make it to dinner. Then after dinner, I'm gonna make it to lights out. And at lights out, I'm gonna make it to the next morning. And you did. And as long as I kept those short goals in front of me, the idea of quitting never really even came close to manifesting itself. Most people don't get overwhelmed because of what they're doing today. They get overwhelmed because they're— that they're already carrying tomorrow. They're carrying the next month. And they're doing it the next year. They're doing it all at the same time. When you're staring at the entire mountain, it feels impossible. And instead, I want you to ask yourself just one question. What's the next step? What's the next right step? Not 10 steps, not the entire plan. Not how you're going to solve every single problem, just the next step. You know, maybe it's sending that email. Maybe it's going for a walk. Maybe it's having a conversation that you've been avoiding. Maybe it's opening up an account. Maybe it's paying a bill. Whatever it is, right? What is that next step? And you focus right there. Momentum is built one step at a time. Tip number 2, rest without quitting. And this is hard. It's hard for people, especially if you are driven, if you're that Type A, capital A, bolded, underlined personality. Rest without quitting. And man, it's easy. It's easy to just— you almost feel like you're going to lose your mind on that. And that's— this is where people stumble. This is where people get tripped up a lot because some people never rest and eventually they burn out. I've watched a lot of really close people in my life, man. They drive, drive, drive, drive, and all of a sudden, Boom. And burnout looks different. Burnout can look like divorce. Burnout can look like alcoholism. Burnout can look like drugs. Burnout can look like an affair. Burnout can look like just sitting on the couch and not doing anything. And you can see people take a break and they never return. Other people, you're gonna rest, or you're gonna see them rest, and they just stop moving. And there's a difference between rest and surrender. Rest is strategic. When I was working my way out of the Chihuahuan Desert after being out of food and water, I was very strategic about when and where I was going to rest at. And basically, I was holding up during the day. I'd taken my tent, cut it apart so I could use it as a daytime cover, put it over the creosote bushes, and slide underneath. And rest during the heat of the day and then move at night. Rest is strategic. Rest is recovery. Rest is— it's preparation. Look at pro athletes. You'll hear pro athletes talking about taking rest days, you know, whether they're football, hockey, track, whatever. They take a rest day. They schedule it out. And you know, when they take a recovery day, nobody calls them weak. When a craftsman puts down a tool, steps away, takes a break, looks at the— at what he's done, Nobody questions their commitment. And since we've been working on the metaphor of hiking, when a hiker stops to catch their breath, headed halfway up a trailway, maybe it's a scenic overlook, nobody tells them that they failed. They're simply preparing for the next stage of the journey. Again, in hiking, right, hiking and backpacking, Stopping, finding a place where you can relax, whether it's a fallen log or maybe it's a place on the trail where they've created a rest spot, scenic overlook. Man, I'm adjusting my pack, I'm adjusting my shoes, might change out my socks, can drink some water. It's simply preparing for the next stage of the journey. And brother, if you're tired, if you're exhausted, take today and rest. Take the evening off. Go sit by the water. Take a walk. Read a book. Turn off the phone and stop scrolling. Turn off the podcast. But whatever you do, please do not confuse rest With quitting, because the mission is still the mission. You're simply gathering strength to do the next part of the climb. Tip number 3, stop carrying that pack alone. One of the biggest lies people tell themselves is that they should be able to figure everything else out on their own. I do this all the time. Oh, I got it. I'll figure it out. And then we isolate. We withdraw. And if you're like me, you get stuck inside your own thoughts. And the reality is that we all need guides from time to time. We need people who can help us see what we're missing, people who can challenge our assumptions, People who can remind us of our strengths, especially at times where we feel like we've forgotten them. Hey, that might be a coach. Oh my gosh! Hey, I know one. That's what I do. Trying to carry every burden by yourself rarely makes the journey easier. Sometimes strength looks like. Asking for help. Remember we talked about that next step, tip number 1? That first step might be reaching out, contacting a coach, whether that's me, someone else. I would love to see if we're a good fit. Sometimes growth begins that moment that you stop pretending that you got it all figured out. Because if today is tough, you don't have to be at your best. You don't have to have all the answers, and you don't have to move at full speed. You simply just have to keep moving. Pause if you need to, rest if you need to, restart if you need to, and adjust your route. If you need to. So whatever you do, don't quit. You can cry, you can complain, just don't quit. You're gonna get out there, the trail's gonna be steep, the weather's gonna be rough, that pack is gonna feel heavy. But you've already survived things you once thought would break, and you're far more capable than what you realize. And every single step that you take is a step forward, no matter how small, no matter how minute the progress is. Hey, if this message resonates with you and you're tired of carrying that pack all by yourself, I want you to consider investing in coaching. Coaching isn't therapy. It's not counseling. It's a partnership that's focused on helping you gain clarity, create momentum, overcome obstacles, move toward that life that you want to build. Sometimes the fastest way up that mountain is having someone walk beside you. So you don't have to do it alone. I want you to go out, visit stanshirescoaching.com to learn more. And until next time, just keep taking the next step. The mountain isn't conquered all at once. It's conquered one step at a time. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you.