Top Signs That Someone Is Faking Depression

So men, they do not fake depression. They actually fake something else, which I'm going to share in a moment. But it's World Mental Health Day today, and across the world there are going to be many people who are struggling and suffering. Unfortunately, we've got these horrendous wars going on— Israel, Palestine, Russia, Ukraine, there are going to be families and loved ones who are really struggling. And, um, maybe you're struggling, and maybe someone you know is struggling. And often, you know, when people end up committing suicide, or, um, you know, they're in a lot of trouble, you don't know this because they seem fine on the outside. They're okay, they're laughing, they're joking, and on the inside they're in a lot of pain. So I wanted to do my bit on World Mental Health Day and give you some tips. Now, I'm not the kind of person who thinks that theory and degrees are as relevant and useful as real-life experience. So I have real-life experience running a business for 20 years. The ups and downs, the highs and lows, the ebbs and flows. I have real-life experience mentoring thousands of entrepreneurs. Do you know, I sort of have like a, almost like a hotline that I offer where if people want to talk to me, if they're struggling, then I'll give them 15 minutes of my time. And having done that over many years, I guess like if someone is giving their time to the Samaritans, for example, then over time you start to see some common threads. So men do not fake depression. Men fake other things. Men fake being strong. Men fake being okay. They don't fake depression. And you are never weak if you ask for help. And a lot of people feel that asking for help is a weakness. It's actually a strength. There is no shame in asking for help. I mean, you might— let's say you wanted to learn how to play chess. You might, for example, ask someone to teach you, and you wouldn't feel shame or embarrassment about asking someone who's better at chess to teach you about chess. Why? Because you know they're better at chess. So in life, there is someone who has mastered the area where we're struggling, and so you can ask for help— a therapist, a coach, a mentor, or a friend— because what you're going through is temporary. So that's the second thing. So the first thing is ask for help. The second thing is know that what you're going through is temporary. And by the way, everything is temporary. So what is good is temporary. What is bad is temporary. And so, what was it that Churchill said? When you're going through hell, keep going. Because you will get through it. I think the third thing is to show yourself a bit of compassion. So for example, My therapist would often talk about what she called the— my inner child, you know, the young boy, the little Rob, I think she called them. And she said to me once, she said, if the little Rob was sitting there, how would you feel about him? What would you say to him? And I said that I would feel shame. And she said, That's so sad. I said, what if it was your son? Sorry, she said, what if it was your son or your nephew or your godson? And I said, well, of course I'd have deep empathy and love. And she said, well, if you'd have deep empathy and love for all the other people who are going through challenges, why have you— do you feel shame about yourself? Why haven't you got deep love and empathy for yourself? So I guess my third thing to say is you are worthy of love. Whilst we all need love and you might want love from someone else, actually the person you really need love from is yourself. So maybe you catch yourself out doing things shit and making mistakes and failing. Why don't you also catch yourself out doing something good? So for example, I'm outside my gym. I've just been in there and done 8 rounds of pretty hard body sparring at 8 o'clock in the morning. I should be patting myself on the back. Well, actually I shouldn't because I'm sweaty. But, you know, I should feel good about that because, you know, everyone else is in bed. So if you're going to pick holes in yourself, can you also lift yourself up? Give yourself credit. Give yourself praise. You may think that you need praise from others, but actually you need praise from yourself the most. If anyone is struggling, by the way, DM me. I'm happy to give you a call. I can just listen, or if you want some sort of practical solutions from experience. So Ricky has said, hey, do you recall talking to me on the phone? You helped me a lot. I really appreciate that, Ricky. It's World Mental Health Day today. So maybe you might want to share this if, you know, you think it's a good message to put out there. You know when you ask someone if they're okay and they go, "Yeah?" Maybe ask them again. And maybe ask them again. And maybe double and triple check. Because you never know. And remember, like I said, men don't fake depression. They fake being okay. They fake being strong. They fake having everything together. In a way, that's part of being a man. I'm not saying as a man we should bleed all of our emotions everywhere. You need to do it in the right environment. You need to talk to the right person. You know, you need to trust them because sometimes people don't open up because they've been burned in the past opening up, and I get that. So you need to do it in the right environment about— and be wise about that environment and what it is. Um, so yeah, I hope you found this content useful. I wonder if you wouldn't mind sharing it. And imagine if we all had a little bit more compassion and love and patience for each other. You know, sometimes my kids can be naughty. I can feel myself getting a little bit frustrated, and my wife says, "They're just being themselves. They're just children." And I think that that's a good way, you know, if you want to have good interpersonal relations, you're having empathy for people and, you know, understanding that they're just doing the best with what they know, and they're just being themselves. I think that can help you with dealing with colleagues at work or in your partnership and relationship if someone triggers you. Um, yeah. And by the way, you can't give what you haven't got. You can't pour from an empty cup. So a lot of people, you know, they say things like, you know, I just want to be successful in business, or I just want to attract, and I just want a good partner, I just want someone to love me for who I am. And I think we all deserve that. But at the same time, you have to be that to attract that. And, you know, if you don't love yourself, then why should anyone else? And if you don't believe in yourself, then why should anyone else? Now, sometimes when I'm struggling, I think, well, if they can do it, then I can do it. Because what have they got that I haven't? And that's not me self and stop puffing up myself. It's just like, if that person can do it, so can I. If I just learn what they've done and apply myself, then, you know, I could do it too. Now, a few little hacks. I don't know if you want to put this in the comments, um, maybe, maybe you could give me some of your little tips that have worked for you. These are, of course, very personal, and you should test these. I'm not saying they're one size fits all, but ice baths really make my body feel good for a good couple of hours. And real clearing of the mind, that works. A good hard cardio or CrossFit cardio session, you know, some, some body sparring or some HIIT or CrossFit, you know, with weights and cardio, really getting fully out of breath, that works very well. A long walk, especially in the morning, that works very well. Helping other people and solving their problems and giving some of your time to make other people's lives feel better, that helps. Eating good food, you know, that— I don't know if you've ever done any of the Wim Hof breath exercises. But there are a lot of things that you can do which, if you're feeling shit, can quite quickly make you feel better. And what a lot of people do is they do sort of— they almost have an addiction or a wallowing in their own self-pity. What is it they say? Misery loves company. Whereas if you're feeling low, slow, lethargic, down, depressed, you know, can you jolt yourself to doing something whether that's long walk, speak to someone on the phone, have meaningful conversations, hit the gym, do the breathwork, jump in the ice bath, whatever, and break that pattern. Because actually what can happen is, you know, things can make you or break you. So something can happen and it can break you because you don't learn from it and take actions to negate it. Or something can happen and it can be the greatest gift. Like anything can be a curse and a gift. You can go in the boxing ring and get knocked out, or you can go in the boxing ring and get really fit. Anything can be a curse or a gift depending on how you use and look at the situation. So my question to you is, are you using what's happening to you as a gift or a curse? Because you can't control necessarily what happens, but you can control how you respond and you react to it. So are you using Everything, in every stressing hides a blessing. Everything happens for you, not to you. So I hope you found some of these tips useful. I wonder if you wouldn't mind sharing this on World Mental Health Day. Isn't it crazy that I can do a video about Russell Brand and it get 500 zillion views and I do the most important content ever? And so, you know, it would maybe rely on, on you sharing and maybe the algorithms need to wake up and realize what's actually important. We should all be talking about this more than a load of nonsense that's going on in the world. Anyway, let me know your thoughts. Thanks for tuning in, and remember, if you don't risk anything, you risk everything.