Who Should Pay for the First Date?

Let me ask you this: who should pay for the first date? I do want to give you a trigger warning. Not everyone's going to like what I think about this, so you may want to go and get on with the rest of your day if you get easily triggered. Now, there's a video that's just gone viral on TikTok about who should pay for the first date, and it's causing a bit of a stir. I would love your thoughts. Please let me know in the comments 'Who you believe should pay for the first date?' Now, this divorce lawyer, who obviously has seen a zillion divorces, says that who you marry is really important when it comes to not ending up divorced. That's common sense. And the first date is a way to understand and maybe to test the kind of person that you may end up marrying. So this divorce lawyer says that the man should pay for the first date. I do not see why the man should pay for the first date, but we'll come back to that. I would love your thoughts. Let me know in the comments, because this question has troubled many people, maybe for centuries. Um, okay, so this divorce lawyer says that the man should pay for the first date, or at least offer to pay for the first date, and see how the woman responds. And if the woman is in no way prepared to put their hand in their pocket and contribute to that date, this divorce lawyer believes that this person, the woman in this instance, could be entitled. And if they're not even prepared to pay half, or even to offer to prepare to pay half, or even pretend to offer to pay half, then you could be moving into a relationship with someone that could be very entitled and expect too much from the relationship. So this is what this divorce lawyer said. Now that was interesting. Now I do not believe that the man should pay for the first date, and here's why. Number one, we have non-binary, we have they, and we have many people who don't want to be associated by a gender. So what about that? People often say, well, what about chivalry? Well, you know, that's kind of a bit old-fashioned. Now, let's be honest, I used to be a gentleman or a gentle they, but that's kind of old. The next thing is, if we want equality, because we do want equality, men want equality, some men, women want equality, if we want equality, then why should we expect men to pay for the first date? Now, I have spoken to many women who expect a man to pay for the first date, but why? Why? Why should they? Now, some people say, well, surely the right thing to do is whoever invited the person on the date pays for the date. And I think that's a good way to do it, because look, the invitee, the person who invites the person, that's something that they wanted to do, and that's pretty clear. And then, of course, you can rotate from there and take in turns. Other people have said, well, some people earn more than others, So maybe you split the bill more according to how you earn. But what's wrong on the first date with just splitting the bill? Splitting the bill 50/50 down the line, start equal, start as we mean to go on. So let me know what you think in the comments about this. But this divorce lawyer has said that a man should pay to gauge and test the response of the woman to see if they're prepared to pay half, to see if they're entitled or not. And he believes that if they make no murmurs as to pay for half, then it's likely that you're getting into a relationship with an entitled person. That's theory number 1, and the divorce lawyer would probably know. That's not my words, but I know this. I know that if I'm on a date— and by the way, that was 15 years ago, hashtag just saying— but if I'm on a date and there's absolutely no willing from the partner to pay at least half and they expect me to pay for everything, what sort of precedent does that set for the rest of our lives together? And why should someone pay for everything? Surely in a relationship, if we want equality, there should be fair exchange. Now, by the way, if one person earns all the money, then they should probably pay for more, as long as there's fair exchange the other way. But you don't know any of that on a first date, and anyone can afford a first date. So I just think you're setting the relationship up for a fail at the start. Now, what a lot of men I've seen do, you know, they sort of make out that they're very chivalrous and romantic, and they pay and they pay and they pay, and then it gets to a point where they've set that expectation that they'll pay for everything. And then when they don't want to pay for everything now, they want the other, the partner to, to pay half. It then becomes an issue. And there's like, wait a minute, you're just, you're just letting me pay for everything, but you're off, you've offered to pay for everything. So it creates all this issue. Whereas if the person who invites the person out on the date pays this time and then the other person pays next time, or you go Dutch and you pay half, then there's none of those issues. And also, you know, the whole thing of a man and a woman has completely changed now anyway. And if we want equality, then surely we have to behave equally. So I'd love your thoughts. Let me know what you think in the comments. Who should pay for the first date? This discussion goes wild. There's a viral TikTok video kicking off right now from a divorce lawyer who says the man should pay, but the reason the man should pay is to offer to pay, to test the woman, to see if the woman will pay half, or at least offer to pay half, or pretend to pay half. To see if they're entitled or not. And if they make no offer and no murmur of even to remove the credit card from the purse, then they're probably entitled and you should steer clear. I don't know what you think about that, but equality of sex, equality of paying the bill, unless someone really chases someone, invites them to take them out, and then they can pay, and then they can swap roles next time. That's what I think. Let me know what you think in the comments. Just a quick fun video. Also, why don't you share it and let's see what everyone else thinks? Look, this is kind of a bit of fun as well, so don't get too freaking on your high horse and, you know, call me this, that, and the other. Um, but I think how you do anything is how you do everything, and you should start how you mean to go on. So I have seen people who are overly generous at the start, almost to buy the love and affection of someone, and that's just setting yourself up to fail later when the person who's been bought all the affection realizes that there's only buying and there's nothing beneath it, or that they're covering up for something. Or then an expectation has been set that it's just normal that you pay and I don't. And then when the person who's paid for everything wants it to become equal, then there's an issue. Why don't you just start it right in the first place? Let me know what you think in the comments. Hit the share button. Don't get too sweaty about this, but I would love your thoughts. Thanks for tuning in. Um, look, there's these many moral quandaries when it comes to money. And I like talking about them, um, because I don't think that money is talked enough about in the UK, certainly. You know, sex and money, they're just not talked about enough. But I ain't no sex guru, but I've done all right when it comes to money. So I will endeavor to raise these moral quandaries. And it might look like, oh, Rob's just talking about something that's not, you know, not really that interesting or relevant, like I just did a video about Meghan Markle. But you've got to look beyond the subject and look beyond the the moral quandaries, the social dilemmas, because you want to probably attract the right partner, and you don't want to end up with a wrong'un, and you've got to play the game in a smart way. So who do you think should pay for the first date and why? And if you think I'm wrong, then let's have it. And hit the share button as well. I'd love everyone else's thoughts on this. Thanks for tuning in, and remember, if you don't risk anything, you risk everything.