027: It's Not The New-Age. It's the Now-Age. Interview with author Ruby Warrington of The Numinous

Namaste and welcome back to the Highest Self podcast, a place where we discuss what makes you your soul's highest evolvement. I am so overwhelmed with gratitude by how many beautiful messages I've been receiving by you guys about my book, about this podcast. And so many of you who have are just tuning in right now, I expect, like, oh, everyone must have known me for the past, like six years, but so many of you are finding me now. And it's exactly what you need at this point of your journey. And I am absolutely loving the response I've gotten on the last podcast episode about Kriya, Karma and Dharma. So if you haven't heard that episode, I definitely suggest listening to it might be a life changer for you. And so many people are so moved by the definition of Kriya, which is my favorite word in the whole entire planet, and wanting to live their lives aligned with that flow. So in today's episode, we are going to be interviewing a special someone, Ruby Warrington, who is the founder of the Numinous. So you may be following the new Numinous online or on their blog, but it's an online magazine that kind of bridges the gap between the mystical and the mainstream. So she's also the co founder of moonclub, which is an online mentoring program for spiritual activists, which I am a member of and creates sober curious events in New York City called Club Soda. So we discuss all about what it means to be sober curious, how Moon Club was instrumental in me meeting Deepak, because that's how I met a friend of mine who invited me to the yoga conference where I met him, and all sorts of other things. Her book just came out a few months ago. It's called Material Girl Mystical World. So I highly suggest checking it out. Especially if you're new to spirituality, you want to learn all about crystals and soul mates and all sorts of things and sort of like what I've done with Ayurveda. She's done that with the whole New age movement, which she calls the now age movement, and kind of streaming away from it, being sort of like fringy and weird and being like, yeah, it's cool. And you can still like love your life and go out and have fun and look amazing and do all of these things that you think you have to give up in order to become spiritual. But actually it's all part of your spiritual process. So I love the femininity that she brings to it. The flow, fun, the color. Her book is like the most fun shade of shade of hot Pink. And if you follow the Numinous on Instagram, it's just like really cute art and I just love it. So I'm really excited for you to check out this interview and if you want to discuss more about it, join my highest self podcast Facebook group which is called Mind Body Balancers, also highest self podcast Facebook group. And that's where we kind of just take the discussion further and talk about ways that these thought leaders are influencing us. So if making magazines, writing a book, all of that stuff is something that you want to experience as part of your dharma, then be sure to listen to this episode. Talk to you guys later. Enjoy. I am so excited to have Ruby Warrington here. She is such an amazing human being. She is the author of Material Girl, Mystical Mystical World, which is an incredible book for anyone who's interested in the now age to a high vibe life. I absolutely love that she created the Moon Club with some someone named Alex Alexandra Roxo, who's just such an amazing person as well. And Moon Club is something that I'm a member of and we're going to talk about that in the interview. And it's really just kind of like a hub for all of us spiritual people to get together and they have monthly moon rituals and PDFs that they give out on the best, the best music to listen to and the best clothes to wear and all of that. So I just love how she's taken spirituality and made it so modern. And I'm really excited to interview her today. So welcome Ruby.

Thank you. I'm excited to be here chatting with you, honestly.

Of course. And I'm so happy that I got to make it to your book signing event not too long ago when you were here in la.

Yes. And we got to meet in person. It's so cool. I mean, I love you mentioned Moon Club and it's so fantastic to have created this very active and what feels like a super connected online community. And we are all, we can all be so connected online and it's wonderful. But whenever I get the opportunity to hang out with our members or anyone in real life, we're just kind of really reminded about how, how special that like connection is as well, you know. So yeah, it was great to meet you in person.

Oh, absolutely. And I was probably the first person who signed up for Moon Club. This moment that you announced it, I was like, I'm signing up for the whole year. So the first question that I want to ask you before we dive into all of these things is what makes you your Highest self.

Well, you know, it doesn't sound that exciting considering all of the mysterious and wonderful things I talk about on the numinous and in my book. But honestly, I feel like getting enough good quality sleep is like my number one thing for feeling my highest self. And I think it's because sleep, I think sleep is kind of undervalued in our society. We're so always on. There's so many exciting things to be doing. We can be here, we can be there, we can be across time zones and actually we forget, it's easy to forget how much sleep we actually need in order to fully recharge so that we can like have full access to all of our energy. And for me, when I'm the most energized is when I feel my highest self.

Right.

I remember hearing once that you could that anything, that anything that gives you more energy is addictive. If we think about things like coffee, sugar, alcohol, other drugs, these are things that typically give us more energy and more access to what feels like a kind of energized state, I suppose a high state. So for me, when I really, when we really strip it back, well, what really makes me energized is getting enough good quality sleep. So it sounds kind of like, oh yawn, like literally. But at the same time I just know I can see it's like night and day. Haha. Another pun. When I know I've been getting enough sleep. Like how just inspired and creative and excited about life I feel, you know, and how high I feel.

Absolutely. And I love that answer. Because sleep is something that most of us, we put in the back corner because we think it's like kind of keeping us from being our highest selves. Because it takes up a lot of time and it's an idle moment, but you have to have that period of inertia in order to blossom into the butterfly that you are.

Exactly, exactly. So I really do, I safeguard my sleep like super, super highly. And I'm really, really protective over it. But it's so worth it for me.

Do you have any sleep rituals that you recommend for us?

Well, I mean really. Oh my goodness. I go to bed at about half past nine at night, but that gives me enough time to be like off my phone for at least half an hour. And I like to just read a novel in bed. Like I don't even read Self Help. I don't read anything that could be remotely connected to my work. I like to have to give my brain like half an hour to just kind of like get out of work mode and out of like processing mode. And I find that really great fiction is very transporting for me and it sort of almost takes me into this semi dreamlike state. So I have, yeah like half an hour at least before I go to bed that I just read and dive into a good book.

What are you doing?

So that's my. That's my ritual.

I love that. What are you doing now?

I'm currently reading 1984.

Oh, I've read that by George Orwell. Amazing. Yes, it's a classic.

Lots of people read it in school. I never did for some reason. And I just feel like it's been referenced so much recently in terms of current world event that I felt it was my duty to dive in. So I'm about halfway through 1984 at the moment.

Amazing. Well, that's not really like a lullaby. It's like kind of freaky.

More like a nightmare. But it's interesting. It's really, it is, it is really fascinating. And I'm actually just off on a big trip tomorrow and I bought Joan Didion's the Year of Magical Thinking. I haven't really read much of her work, but it's another classic that I'm really excited to dive into.

That's so great and it's so important. I mean we all hear like not to be on our phones before we sleep, but like realistically do we do it. So it's amazing that you're not saying it needs to be two hours hours. It needs to be this much time. You're just like 30 minutes of reading a book. And I think that's really cool.

I mean, you know, we talk in Moon Club a lot about the value of rituals and how once we get, we bring in rituals into our lives, even if they're as small and as simplistic a ritual as half an hour of reading before I go to sleep at night. Our brain and our body, I think, kind of anticipates that time. And so we get much more out of it when it becomes like a ritualized regular thing that we do. So why make your rituals over complicated and lengthy if you know that realistically you're not going to fit them in? I say when it comes to creating rituals and routines like that around our wellbeing and our self care, make them as simple as possible to start off with, you know, so that you really can commit to them.

Yeah. And you're, you're actually totally ayurvedic with that. They recommend being in bed by 10pm because at 10pm our Pitta or fire energy comes up and that's when we get the second wind of energy. But if you're asleep by 10pm, you actually get the most sound sleep between 10pm and midnight because the sun, solar rays are still on the earth. And when you're using that for sleep, it's like very deeply nourishing. So you're practicing Ayurveda without even knowing it.

This is very interesting because I am very pitta in my physical body. I think I'm more vata mentally, but pitta physically for certain. And my mom actually back in the 80s was like, she got really involved or kind of interested in the work of an Indian doctor called Shyam Singh. And he helped, he worked a lot with food as medicine. And it's only in, later, later in life that I put the dots together, realized of course he was practicing Ayurveda and he always used to say that. And I think that's, it's not why I do. That's naturally what my body asks for. And the more well versed I am in really following the physical cues to what my bodies and spirit is kind of asking of me. But my body wants to be in bed at that time. And I am, like I said, I. I'm committed to listening to my body. But it's interesting. Yeah, my mum always used to repeat that, go, you know, you should really be in bed before midnight. Those are the most important hours to be asleep.

Exactly, yes. And a body when it's in balance further create craves the activities and the foods that bring it into balance. And since you've gained this balance, your body's like, no, this works really well for me. I'm not willing to let go of this.

So cool. I love it when the dots get joined like that. Thank you.

Totally. So I want to talk a little bit about your book. There's just so much to discuss in this book. But so this podcast, what we talk a lot about about is about becoming your highest self. So what gave you the inspiration to write this book and what was that journey like?

Well, the book is based on my platform, the Numinous, which is an online magazine and event series that I founded in 2013. And it really began as a passion project for me to put something creative out into the world that was really based on my own interests and what I really wanted to be writing and talking about. I have a background in magazine journalism and I just got kind of really burnt out in that career. Lots of the stuff that I was Writing about, particularly back then, kind of like, you know, 2010, 11, it just wasn't really aligned, I realized with what with my beliefs and what I wanted to see in the world. And so I decided to launch my own platform just on the side, a blog basically, for my own. For my own kind of entertainment and fulfillment. And then shortly, well, actually just before I got around to launching it, my husband got a job in New York. And so I moved from London to New York and all this space opened up in my schedule and in my life, I guess. And I was kind of like, okay, well, now I can put a bit more time into this. And it was a year or so after I began work on the Numinous that somebody, a publisher at HarperCollins, actually reached out and asked if I had a book proposal in the works because she really felt that I was bringing something new to the spirituality space. This site covers a lot of astrology and tarot, but also talks more about kind of deeper spiritual concepts and lifestyle practices, as you said in the intro, in a really kind of like modern, accessible and fun and light hearted, kind of clever way. And I think that that was something that was quite new to this space at the time. The scene is really kind of like blossomed in beautiful ways alongside me setting up the Numinous and writing my book into what now feels like it's really becoming more and more mainstream, which is fantastic. But, yeah, that's how the book came about because this editor found me and. I'm sorry, thrilled that I kind of. I don't know. Although, yeah, thrilled. But also at the same time, it's not that I was actively manifesting it, but you know what they say, you know, you're just vibrating. But I was just vibrating. I kind of feel like I vibrated it into my life totally. So, yeah. Which makes it sound effortless. And as you know, writing a book is far from effortless, let alone editing it and promoting it and everything else. So it definitely has been the biggest challenge of my life, but by far the most fulfilling also.

Absolutely. And I love that, that you weren't. You know, so many people out there, they want to write books, but they don't take the first step of starting the blog and building the community. And I think that once you've had that community built in, then the book is just going to happen because they want that physical thing to hold onto. That's essentially who you are, your essence, your message.

Exactly. And I think that publishers, you know, they're looking. The publishing landscape is so different to how it was 10 years ago. And really they're looking for a full kind of built out platform or at least the beginnings of the foundation before you'll. Even before they'll even speak to you. But it's really interesting to me, when I was approached about writing a book, I was like, wow, this doesn't happen. People pitch books for years before they get. But actually it seems like it's quite common. Like a lot of people I know and a lot of people who write for my site have been approached about doing books. And it sort of feels like because we can give ourselves the kind of visibility and platform now, thanks to social media and blog platforms, it's much easier for publishers to find the distinctive voices in a space. So yes, if you do want to write a book, do not delay in getting your voice out there is what I say.

Totally. And I think there's something really empowering about it because a lot of people might be listening and say, oh, well, I don't have a following, I don't have a blog, so I'll never get a book deal. But the empowering part is anyone can start a blog and create that following and get the book deal. You don't have to pitch to publishers. All you have to do is become that writer right now and the rest of the things will happen naturally.

Exactly. But I would definitely say pick a subject that like you're so passionate about. You can literally write and think and talk about 24 7. Because it does. Like I said, it does take work as you know, to really get to that, to get to that place where you're going to get noticed, I suppose. Which isn't to say that it's hard. It doesn't feel hard if it's something that you're 100% passionate about. Which is how I always felt about the numinous. You know, like I said, it was born as a passion project. I just wanted to write and research and talk about all the stuff that I was really fascinated with. And so it's felt very effortless in terms of I never have to go, oh, I've got to go and write this thing or research this thing. It's more like the effort is there's such an abundance that I want to be doing. The effort is like just managing it all.

And what I love about your book, which is so similar to my approach, is it takes, you know, you discuss like shamanism and plant medicine and you know, the different types of personalities in New York and la. It literally feels like I'm talking to my friends. And it's like it's taken that conversation into a book. And that's why it was so exciting for me to read, because it, it wasn't just like, oh, you know, the astrology, astrological charts are like this, or you know what? It just felt like I was having a conversation and it was just so relatable.

That was really what I. How I wanted the book to be very much kind of my story. So it's an introduction to all of these topics, but through the lens of my own personal experiences, I've completely thrown myself into what I call this, what I have coined as this like now age scene, which is kind of an updating of the new age scene, I suppose. And it's literally been my life for the past three years. And there have been so many kind of like funny experiences and crazy rides and amazing people and conversations I've had and met along the way that I wanted to put all of that into the book to really bring it to life and to really show that this is, this is happening all around you. If you just choose to open up to it and kind of begin your own investigations. You don't have to go and study for years up a mountain to become well versed in these practices. Of course go and do that. But at the same time, you can begin your investigations right here in your own cities, you know, right here on your own Instagram. Feedback.

Yes. And one of my favorite things that you wrote about and you talked about is your view on ayahuasca and how the plants are in on it. And I just love that. And I've shared this with like so many people. So can you just tell us a little bit about this theory that I'm obsessed with?

Okay, so for anyone listening who's not familiar, ayahuasca is one of a. One of a group of plant medicines, as the indigenous shamans would describe them. So these are medicinal herbs and plants that can be imbibed to bring about state of enlightenment or kind of like self understanding or emotional and spiritual healing. Ayahuasca is one of the most popular in the sense that it's become the most mainstream or kind of known, I suppose. And it can include. I haven't taken ayahuasca myself, but know many, many people who have and have done lots of research around it. But yeah, it can bring about, you know, hallucinogenic states. It can induce, well, it generally induces kind of extreme purging of the vomiting variety. So it's kind of a really intense deal. An intense thing to do. And what I find so interesting about it when typically, after people have an experience with ayahuasca, they come out of it with a renewed sense, or perhaps even for the first time in their lives, the sense that, wow, I, Ruby, am intimately connected to all living things on this planet by this universal source, energy. And therefore, it is my responsibility to act with integrity, bring a useful contribution to the planet. And really, it's like really big realizations that people have and generally coming out of those experiences, begin to make big changes in their lives, as and where necessary, in order to come back more into alignment with this kind of spiritual understanding of themselves. And what I found really interesting was that lots of the people who are having These experiences are CEOs and business leaders and influential celebrities who are kind of like, coming back into society with this newfound view of the world. And in my book, I talk about how, you know, lots of the. The shamans themselves and plant medicine practitioners will talk about these plants having their own spirit, you know, their own kind of consciousness. And I kind of have a theory that perhaps, you know, we've got so close to environmental Armageddon. Like, we've really abused the planet to the extent that the plants themselves, themselves have finally gone, oh, my God, we're gonna have to, like, we need to intervene here. They're staging their own intervention. They've got together and they're like, right, we need to get these humans and we need to show them what time it is and tell them to clean. Clean up. Clean themselves up. So, yeah, my theory is that the. The ayahuasca plants, because I asked, is actually a brew of two different plants have kind of got together, had a pow wow, and been like, right, game on. We need to. We need to step in here.

I mean, I love that because it's so true. I've never done ayahuasca either. But the people that I see who have done it are normally people who aren't really that spiritual beforehand. Like, they've just sort of heard of it. They're maybe beginning personal development work, and then they do ayahuasca and they come back and they're. They're meditating and they've gone vegan and this, and they're like. They're totally shifted people. And whereas people like us, I feel like, who are already, like, kind of of living that sort of life, it doesn't appeal to us as much because it's like, I don't. I don't feel like I need that. I already know what it's going to tell me, granted, maybe at some point in my life I will feel the call, but right now we don't. But the people who are feeling the call are the ones who need to wake up to it.

Yes, exactly. And they do. You know, they say that, you know, if, if and when it's your time, you'll know and the plant will sort of find you. And I think the same like I felt, I have felt particularly coming from this journalistic perspective of like, well, if I'm going to write about these things, I really need to experience. I felt a lot of pressure in a way to go and do an ayahuasca ceremony, even though I'm really not drawn to it. But I've come to the same conclusion. It's like I've awoken through various other techniques, realizations, life experiences to these truths in different ways I can have. Like, I'm very, very sensitive to energy as I described in the beginning. Like just knowing what my body's about and what my. And being very aware of my intuition and the messages it's showing me. And I've had like amazing intu, kind of downloads in Kundalini yoga classes or in breathwork sessions where I have literal hallucinations of kind of visions of conversations I need to have and situations that need to be cleaned up. And so I kind of, I feel like I'm having those experiences through other means.

Totally, totally. And I think what it is with the ayahuasca, it gives you like 20 years of doing this work like in one go, which can also be really dangerous if you're not prepared for it. Because a lot of times ayahuasca should, I mean most of the time it shows you a lot of ugly parts about yourself that you don't want to face. And if you're not willing to stand up and do the work, then you're, you're going to be walking with that and that's really heavy.

Uh huh, exactly. And I think, you know, I too, in the chapter on plant medicine, I really talk about the importance of doing this, like really doing your research before you find a practitioner or shaman to do the work with. Really, really making sure that you're going into it, knowing exactly what you're letting yourself in for and also having plenty of time and support afterwards. Process whatever's going to come up for you. I would recommend the same, to be honest, for any kind of like deep spiritual practice, but with this in particular, because it is, it's a mind altering substance that's Going to take you out of yourself. And that can be very scary for people for many different reasons. So, yeah, I think proceed with extreme caution. But there are plenty of people out there and more and more resources that can help people find safe ways to, to, to experience ayahuasca and the other plant medicines.

For sure. Like there's this resort that opened up in Costa Rica. It's like the first like all inclusive, five star luxury ayahuasca resort.

It's like, I mean, talk about sign at a time.

Yeah. Like, so la. But I mean, if you do want to do it, that would be a very safe place. And I know like Michael Bernard Beckwith, like teaches you beforehand and they have like therapists and stuff. And I mean, also, you know, you can, you can do shrooms and get like a similar type experience, but it only lasts for like a few hours at most.

Exactly.

It doesn't. You don't need a job. Yeah.

Doesn't necessarily give the extreme kind of like physical purging that comes with ayahuasca, which I think can be.

That, like, scares me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, that's amazing and thank you so much for sharing that. And I think, you know, there needs to be a lot more just writing about the, both the pros and cons of this work because I feel like it's in the past, it's. No one mentions it and then it's really bad. But then everyone's like, oh, well then people are doing ayahuasca, so should everyone do ayahuasca? So I love how you offer that. Like, just choose if it's right for you. You don't have to jump into that to be a spiritual person.

Yes, exactly.

Amazing. And you talk a lot. I love how you talk about like your own definition of beauty and how that's changing and how, how we've become so much. You know, we're seeing beauty now as like self love and self awareness. And can you talk about this whole, like, self love movement and what it means to you?

Sure. It's interesting. The beauty chapter is called the Botox versus natural beauty debate because I think coming from in spiritual circles, I think there's an understanding that the more connected you are to yourself as a spiritual being, the less you really care about, like how you look on the outside or just the more accepting you are of like all of the imperfections and whatever. And that has not necessarily been my experience. And I really wanted to just talk very honestly about that, about how, you know, particularly I'm. I'm 41 now, which is kind of like it's. It's a weird time to be coming out into like a weird life stage, to be kind of like coming out and being really visible, like literally visible for the first time in my life. And it's been a real challenge for me to, you know, when every agent or book publisher I work with is like, take more selfies, do more videos of yourself, and I'm like, just not feeling so great about it. And I wanted to be really honest about that and say that, yes, I have all of these spiritual tools and I have so much like love and compassion and forgiveness for myself. And I feel in every sense and every cell of my being, my inner beauty, my innate beauty, that I'm a beautiful being. And yet still sometimes I really don't like the way I look in photographs. And so, yes, I am going to also use the material girl tools that are available to me to kind of like make me feel great about how I look on the outside too. But what is really interesting, actually, over the past, I'd say six months of the book actually coming out, I have found myself way more accepting and loving of who I see in photographs. And I don't know if that's just because I'm getting more used to myself, kind of like being out there in the world or if it is. I mean, having my book come out, particularly it being such a personal story, has been extremely cathartic and extremely healing when it comes to, you know, the whole conversation. In the, in the chapter on self love, I describe self love as basically coming down to self knowledge, self acceptance and self forgiveness. And I think just writing the book and the process of having my mom read the whole thing, having it come out, see it be well received in the world, see people kind of like feel understood, has really helped bolster all of those things for me. And so, yes, I have. It's interesting. I've noticed literally in the past couple of months that I actually look at most pictures of myself now and think, oh, she looks good, she looks nice today. Which didn't used to be my experience totally.

And you worked in fashion for a really long time.

And that's the other thing, right? I come from world that's so wholly like 100% focused on the external. And so for me, it has been a real kind of like walking the line kind of away and out of that world while still having been deeply conditioned for the majority of my adult life by that world as we all are. We live in such a hyper visual world. You Know, and I think what's one of the great things about social media is that it really is kind of of helping to dissolve sort of very narrow minded or very kind of like one note ideals about what is beautiful. And depending on how we use our social media feeds. And I'm a big proponent, I talk about it in the book of really like being very careful about how you curate your feeds and the imagery and the input that you take in from your feed, literally how you feed yourself through the social media. We can actually really use social media consciously to almost retrain our brains as to what is beautiful and what is acceptable and what is, you know, a healthy, beautiful body and all of these things. But we do have to be very conscious about it because again, there's so much imagery and messaging out there about the way we should look and what we should think is beautiful. So yeah, it's a really interesting and very multifaceted topic and something that I really enjoy diving into.

So yeah, yeah, I mean, about the Instagram thing that's been coming up for me so much recently because I before I downloaded something called Newsfeed Eradicator that I don't have a Facebook newsfeed, but I've tried to look for something like that for Instagram and it doesn't exist. And though my business is on Instagram, I post on Instagram all the time. For me I find it a huge distraction. So. So what I did was I downloaded an app that literally unfollowed everyone that I was following. So it's just following thousands of people that, you know, you just see a picture you like, you follow them. And over time, you know, we've been on Instagram for years now. It added, I had maybe 4,000 people I was following. So I unfollowed everyone. And then I just went back and now I'm following about a hundred people. I'm following the numinous and just people who bring inspiration to my newsfeed that when I look at their pictures I feel like my highest. And now I wish I could just get rid of that Explore page because every time I go on and I get sucked into a black hole. But it truly, you know, social media can be such a beautiful and inspirational thing. It can be like a tarot card going through your news feed as long as we really curate it.

But you're right, exactly. We have to be super conscious. I think that, you know, I talk about addiction in my book. I have my club soda event series which is about specifically alcohol addiction. But I think that Social media is one of the biggest kind of, like, unspoken addictions. And people do talk about it, but, like, really, it feels like it's becoming epidemic and pandemic. And I'm like, we.

It's crazy.

It's really crazy. And it's really on us because I don't think that, you know, anyone's gonna remind us anytime soon that we need to kind of, like, practice sort of caution around our social media consumption. So it kind of is on us to manage that for ourselves. Like, literally, I'm sitting here rubbing my. My arm because my right arm is consistently in spasm. And I think it's just from, like, holding my phone and texting so much, and it's not good. So I need to address this. Also, I love the idea. I love what you just said about the unfollow thing. That sounds like a really great tool.

Yes. And I recorded a podcast episode about this about turning off your DMs so you know how on Instagram people can respond to your story. And what ends up happening is as you get a following, people are. Even if it's a little thing, even if it's all nice things, it's just a lot to respond to. And, like, you feel bad to not respond to people, but there's just every day, hundreds of, oh, where'd you get your shirt? What did you eat for lunch? Where is that? What's this? And it's like, I either have to stop living my life and just respond to every single person or just turn it off. So, yeah, I turned off my DMs, and it's been such a relief for me.

Amazing, right? These tiny, teeny, tiny life hacks or whatever that can, like, free up so much energy. Like, going back to what we were talking about in the beginning, like, we have a limited amount of energy that we can actually have access to in a day. And how do we. I've really got very aware recently of, like, where I'm kind of unconsciously leaking energy when I have so many projects that I feel so passionately about that I really want to help thrive fully in the world. And I'm becoming very aware of all, like I said, the little places I'm leaking energy that essentially mean I'm not able to give my full self to the projects and things I feel really passionately about and I really care about. So that's my current practice, actually, is reining it in and getting and tightening up my energetic ship, for sure.

And for us who have vata minds and many people listening when you have a vata mind, you get so excited about new projects and you're like, oh, like, you have a great idea. I want to join you with that. Or like, right now. I went to a yoga class. I love the yoga class class so much. I'm like, I want to sign up for your teacher training. And I walked out. I was like, why? Why did I just say that? Like, of course I don't have time to go become a yoga teacher now.

Like, so then tell me, tell me. I'm gonna ask you a question for my vata mind. What are. What are a couple of, like, daily practices or foods that I can. Because that you just described me to an absolute tea.

Right, well, I'll send you my book. But. Okay, but basically anything that's grounding. So grounding foods, root vegetables, butternut squash, ginger, turmeric, all of that, that contains the energy of underneath the earth. So we're going to take that on. And then having a routine, having something as you, you said in your own words, like, when your body knows it's time to sleep every night, it naturally gets tired at that time. So that goes with, like, everything with your meals and when you take breaks and when you walk outside. When you create a routine, then your body knows what to expect and will perform that thing better. It'll digest better, it will relax better, et cetera. So having a routine, because vatas, we tend to not have a routine and, and just, you know, just do things as they come, like, oh, I'm not hungry for now. Now I'm really hungry, or I don't want to go outside. I'm in. I'm in my workflow versus now, I'm burnt out. So sometimes, even though it doesn't feel like, oh, as intuitive as I wish it could, following a routine will help you keep that intuition going.

Amazing. Amazing. Well, I do naturally. I'm naturally good at that. And I actually get really antsy when I. When things come up, up that take me out of my routine.

Well, that's the pitta in you that's coming out.

So.

Yeah, it's also not. Not being, you know, overly attached to it because life does throw us curveballs at the time. But yeah, I think if you're a vata and pitta, having more kapha, more grounding earth, like connecting with nature more and things like that would really help.

Read your book.

Yay. So another thing that I love and you have a whole section on is about love and soulmates and twin flames. And I just love the subject so much. So can you tell us a little bit about the difference between a soulmate and a twin flame?

So the way I see it, a soulmate is someone that you've kind of like, incarnated with over lifetimes, who is literally like your spiritual running buddy. You know, it. You wouldn't necessarily. You might have had a different relationship with this soul in different lifetimes, but there's a sense of ease and just kind of like, meant to be together. And you might have experienced this with friends, with family members, with romantic partners, etc. Etc. A twin flame, similarly, you will likely have some kind of a karmic history with. But in this instance, it's like there's something to learn from each other. So this person may be someone who really triggers you, or it may be someone that you're kind of like you consistently find yourself in really crazy business situations with, or it's that kind of like, learning process. Is how I see the distinction between the twin flame and soulmate. And either one can be a very rewarding relationship, but they come with their different challenges and. And ease, I suppose.

So, yeah, the way. Because people have a lot of definitions of it. So what I got from your quiz, which is on page 184 of her book, is that it seems like with twin flames, there's always this, like, spark, but also, like, a lot of work you have to go through. Whereas with soulmates, things tend to just be easier.

Exactly, exactly. Like when I met my husband, the Pisces, as he is described in the book, he walked in this room and there was literally just this vibe of like, ah, relax, he's here. It literally was like I'd never met this person before, but there was just such an. I felt so easy and comfortable around him. When we went out on our first date, I think we just talked for four hours. It was like I'd known this person forever. And surprised. I mean, also very physically attracted to him. And I actually ended up proposing to him. We moved in together after six months. I proposed to him after we've been together for a year, because I just knew. I just knew this person was my family. I knew he was going to be in my life forever. It was just like this knowing. And here we are 18 years later, still totally happily married. Like, I'm heading off to Europe on a trip, trip for four weeks and I'm freaking out because I'm not going to be with him. So for me, he's like the definition of my soulmate, you know? And I have friends who I'm like, who I'm like that with. Not necessarily, you know, friends who I don't live and spend my entire life with, but it's that friend like you. You haven't seen this person, you really argue with them. You haven't seen this person for six months. And when you get together, it's like no time has passed. We all have those kind of friendships, I hope. And. And with the twin flame, it's more like it's this. Yeah. It's a challenge, and it's generally teaching you something about yourself. It's generally revealing some kind of a lesson or some other layer of self awareness that you need to develop that you're almost seeing kind of like reflected in this person, you know?

Yeah. It's so interesting because the way that I learned it was more like soulmates are people who come to our lives, lives for lessons more. And soul mates can be lovers, they can be friends, it can be karmic type. Whereas your twin flame is basically the shiva shakti that where you're feminine, he's masculine, you're vice versa. And that when you find this twin flame, it's like everything in your world comes together again and you have, like, a sacred mission to fulfill on this planet. And there can be, you know, some things you have to work through. But from what I've learned, it's like you should end up with your twin flameware. But from what I'm reading with you, it's more like the soulmate would be the easiest option. Yeah. Because now I'm wondering which one's my boyfriend. Yeah. Because my boyfriend, it's just like how you described, just easy with him. And we've just. From the moment that we met, we're like, so, like, how many kids do you want to have? Like, we just knew. Right. But I always call him my twin flame because I thought that was like, a higher thing to say than soulmate. But now I'm thinking, should I call him my soulmate?

So confusing.

Yeah.

Well, yeah, like I said, I always understood it the other way.

Interesting. Yeah, I mean, I think that, you know, no one really knows, so there's just all of these different theories about it. But I think it's so true that we have these karmic ties with people. And like, with every relationship, it was put into our lives to teach us a lesson, to get us to a certain place. And then once we learn that lesson, the universe is trying to bring us apart, and sometimes we don't notice it and we hold on. And that. That's when karma really starts playing in and then shit starts going really bad and he cheats and this and that. So I think it's really important to notice like when the relationship is over so you can move on.

Yes, exactly. And again that's just a, that's a lot of the time. Both an intuition practice but also a self love practice. You know, if you. I talk about, you know, the chapter on self love is called Calling in number one. And it's not, you know, it's not a new thing to say but like really the idea of like loving yourself first has to be your number one priority because how else are you ever going to be able to really truly recognize when you're, when those, when those karmic lessons are done and when it is time to move on, you know, if you love yourself first. Yeah, absolutely.

Yay. Well, the last thing I really want to talk about is Club Soda and what does it mean to be sober curious? Because you have these club soda events and you're really promoting the cause. Sober curious, which I'm all about. So can you share this with the listener listeners?

Sure. So Club Soda is an event series that I started here in New York City in February last year and I run the events with a meditation artist called B ET Simkin.

And I've listened to a podcast interview with her and her life is just insane. I think it was on the Almost 30 podcast. It was like crazy.

You guys need to listen what hasn't happened to be. I think we did an interview with her for the, for the site and then I met up with her and just kind of like really liked her vibe. And it was around the same time that I was wanting to start this so. But curious mission I suppose. And it's based on my own journey of really kind of having been throughout my 20s and into my early 30s, working as a journalist in London, living a very kind of like cocktail fueled hedonistic life which also again I write about in the book and nothing at all out of the ordinary or uncommon for my peer group, you know, living in cities like New York and London and la. I suppose to extent, but maybe slightly less less. They're very alcohol fuel. It's just like alcohol is just part and parcel of having a career and a busy social life and that's just what we do. But I got to a point where I really realized that alcohol was having a very detrimental effect on my overall well being. But I also concurrently with this realization saw that it wasn't going to be so easy for me to just stop drinking, not least because it was interwoven through my entire social life. Like all my friends were drinkers. It was stuff I drank with my family. You know, it's just like, so interwoven. And so my attempts to kind of drink less were often thwarted. And I really got to a point with like, wow, am I an alcoholic? Do I need to go to aa? And I took myself to a couple of AA meetings. And when I got there, I kind of realized that, no, this wasn't. This didn't feel like my truth. It wasn't my addiction. And I do acknowledge that I have been in my life addicted to alcohol. I actually have come to the belief or the understanding that anybody who drinks alcohol regularly is a little bit addicted to alcohol, probably because it's. It's a. It's one of the five most addictive substances that is out there. It's heavily marketed at us and is abundantly available everywhere. And our brains, our human minds, our human brains also hardwired to seek out, out and repeat any experiences that bring us pleasure or numb pain, which of which alcohol appears to do both. So I think that it's very easy to become addicted to alcohol. And new studies actually show that many, many more people than would ever call themselves alcoholics are addicted or dependent on alcohol. Anyway. So, anyway, I realized there wasn't really a space or any kind of an organization that was talking about this. Beside, it was either you were AA or you were kind of like out there in the wilds of it, navigating it on your own. And so I decided I wanted to create an event series where people could get together and just kind of like begin to investigate what it might mean to drink less, what it might mean to socialize without alcohol, what it might mean to date without alcohol. Like all of these questions that people had. So the events have been running quarterly for the past year and a half. We just actually did. We did one last weekend at Soho House here in New York. And the weekend before that, we did our first sober curious dance party that was really fun. On the roof of a hotel in Brooklyn. I saw videos.

Oh, my God, it looked amazing. The little. The smoothie shots you were giving out looked unicorn shots. You need to bring them to la. It would be huge.

Well, yes, it's kind of. It's in the pipeline. I'm actually going to be doing an event in London September 7th. There'll be one. So, yeah, it's definitely something I feel very committed to because it's been such a Personal, you know, such an important part of my journey. Because actually going back again to what we were talking about at the beginning, when do I feel most connected to my higher self, to my spirit, to my aliveness, is when I have the most energy and when I, my body is like functioning and it's optimum on a physical level. And actually alcohol for me became something that was really not only stopping that connection, that connection to my, to my aliveness, to my energy and my spirituality, but it was actually, you know, numbing my desire to even seek that connection. I think we live in a culture of such, such instant gratification that many of us are seeking that connection to our innate aliveness or our spirit, right? And alcohol can feel like a really quick and easy way to get there. When we don't have much time, it's Friday night, we want to just feel, we want to feel love, we want to feel connection, we want to feel excited. And so we do a couple of shots and actually if you want to feel those things and for them to be self generated, it takes time and it takes practice and it takes rituals and it takes looking after yourself and takes self care and generating self love and all of these things. And a lot of people aren't ready or maybe don't even realize that you have to, that it's necessary to make that commitment to feel those things. And so they reach for a glass of wine instead. And I am very heavily and highly committed to changing that conversation and helping people to experience all of those things they look for in alcohol. But self generated, totally.

And I couldn't agree with you more. One thing that you need to do when you're in London is go to 5Rhythms. Have you heard of it?

I've been to 5Rhythms here in New York.

They have an amazing one in East London in this beautiful church. It is so much fun. And I'm. I love ecstatic dance. It's like my favorite thing in the world, an ecstatic dance. I even write about it in the Idiot's Guy Diar Beta. Like it's like my recommendation, but it's basically a sober dance party that you're not allowed to talk because the moment you get into conversation, you get into, well, you know, I need to stop and talk to them. You get into self consciousness and when you, you're not, when that isn't even available to you, you just go so deep into your body and you start like doing these weird moves that you didn't even know like existed inside of you. And like things just Start getting weird. Yeah. For, like, everyone. And there's just no judgment. And the music just takes you on a journey. It starts really, like, low and earthy, and it builds up. And I created something called Dance your Doshas, which takes you on a dance journey through your dosha. So I'm all about the sober dance parties, so you need to bring them here. Love it.

And we had something called Kundalini Disco, which been started by this DJ here in New York, Amy K. And she does. So the set will start off. She plays, like, a really amazing dance music. And so she starts off with kind of like some Kundalini careers, and then it just devolves into a kind of mass dance party. It's so much fun.

I love that. Why is all this stuff in New York not here?

Yeah, we'll have to bring it. We'll definitely have to bring it. Another call. It keeps knocking on me.

I'll get involved in any way. I'll teach dance. Yes.

Amazing.

So one conversation that we had in my mind Body Balancers Facebook group recently is I brought up that when I was in Europe at my cousin's wedding, I took. I drank a glass of champagne and I had the worst headache, and I felt horrible. And throughout the trip, every time I would drink, I would feel just really bad, like, headache. Like, I felt like I needed to eat just to get it out of my system. And before I was able to, you know, like when I was probably in college, I would drink and it slowly decreased, decreased. But I used to be able to enjoy one cocktail and be fine. And now it's gotten to the point that even a sip of it makes me feel horrible. So we brought up the discussion on alcohol and spirituality, and we were bringing in different articles about how it affects your vibration and makes you in a lower vibration state. And when your vibration has increased, you just can't handle anymore. So can you speak to that? Have you found that in your experience?

Well, yes, absolutely. And I think that was. So this whole kind of, like, unlearning of my drinking patterns has gone hand in hand with my spiritual journey towards, like I said, finding these practices and connecting to my own sense of spirituality, raising my vibration, all of these things like you just mentioned. And I think that a big part of me really choosing actively or really realizing what a detrimental effect alcohol was having on me was that I was feeling so great in my body through raising my vibration, through all of these wonderful practices, workshops, conversations, people I was bringing into my life, that when I would then drink alcohol, the contrast was such that I would really become. I was so aware of how heavy and suppressing and repressive it was on my system and on my energy and on my vibration basically. So yeah, the two things have absolutely gone hand in hand with for me. Like I can come out of a Kundalini disco class feeling, feeling what it means to be truly high. Like truly high on my own supply. Then if I try and drink alcohol it's like, wow, this now feels so heavy. How. And I. It's just become much more stark. The contrast between the kind of like alcohol high, what I call in the book is like kind of like McKay's, you know, the fast food crappy highs and the real sustained self generated high vibe highs that we can generate ourselves through different spiritual practices for sure.

And I think if anyone wants to see what it does to you, just like go to a club or a bar and be sober and just like look at everyone and it's like, it's like they're not in their bodies.

And I was, yeah, I remember speaking to, I did a talk on this at the Wanderlust Yoga festival and someone college, like she newly started college. She came up and she was just like, thank you for this. It's been really helpful. I feel so much pressure to drink at college. And she's like, but I don't and I'll go out with my friends. And she's like, it's really sad after two or three drinks, they're just not there. I can't. They're just not there. She's like, I see them leave. They're just not with me anymore, you know?

Yeah. Like I was reading this article about how when you drink a lot, your, your vibration decreases and it actually allows like lower vibration migration beings to like, yeah, seize your body. Which is why lots of violence happens and people do things that literally are unlike them because they're like in a way possessed at that time.

Yes, I've read that too. I haven't done too much research into it and I definitely will do more. So. But I think even if you want to take that out of the kind of like mystical context of thinking about low vibration entities, if anything, perhaps alcohol, for whatever reason activates the kind of like baser or more kind of like fearful impulses that are somehow suppressed within us when actually, you know, we need to acknowledge those parts of ourselves, but in a setting that is conducive to processing whatever kind of like negative or heavy or difficult stuff might be latent in our system, not just kind of like randomly in a bar, just letting it out on whoever, whoever happens to be next to us. You know, it's like, sure.

I mean it's very root chakra imbalancing, which is just survival mode. And you see people get into fights at clubs that they would never get into a fight about if they were sober.

Exactly, exactly. I mean, yeah. When you really start looking into the damage that alcohol does to our society in general, to women in particular, linked to so many kind of like chronic health issues for women, it really becomes quite shocking that it's so widely available and so heavily promoted and all of those things. So. But my, as with everything that I do, my approach is less to preach about the negatives and more to celebrate the positives of the alternative and really kind of go, hey, it's so much more fun over here. Come over here and have a unicorn shot and like feel amazing and meet great new, exciting, fighting, high vibe people. And you know, rather than, oh, you're so bad you're drinking.

Exactly.

You know.

Yeah. And I think that's really the way that we'll change the world if we have these, these positive outlets that we can go and meet and create and there's no alcohol involved. And that's a huge thing that I noticed in la. Like people meet up for hikes and they walk on the beach and things like that. When I was living in Boston, the east coast, it's like there really wasn't anything else to do but to go out and drink. So even if you didn't want to, it's like, well then you're just sitting there and everyone else is drinking.

Exactly, yeah. Which is, it's not that fun. So yes, part of the mission of Club Soda is to provide experiences and spaces for people to come and yeah. Have an alternative kind of social experience that doesn't necessarily involve alcohol.

I love that. And for people who don't live in a place that there's Club soda or you know, hikes and stuff, like, and their friends are going out to drink, like what do you recommend they do? Do you recommend that they just stay home and work on their own practice or go with them or say anything?

I think that, I mean, as you know, Moon Club, for example, is an amazing community for meeting like minded people in like, who you might not have come across otherwise? I think that find most places now will have, most towns I think will have some kind of like a yoga center or, or an actual food store or something. And really it's what I did when I came to New York. Because when I moved to New York York, I was still very much in the kind of like boozy, nightclubby, restaurant Y scene. Because that's kind of like the people I knew when I first moved over here. But because I was investigating, I wanted to start the numinous and I was investigating these stories. I would go to whatever workshop, whatever weird kind of like workshop at my local yoga center. And I would just kind of like immerse myself in the alternatives. So the chapter that mainly talks about this in my book book is called Healing is the New Nightlife. And I've kind of like reframed my idea of what. What a social event might be. For me, like an astrology workshop is a social occasion. It's not like necessarily something I'm doing to go and learn about astrology. Of course I'm going to do that too. But it's also how I socialize. Because you start off talking about astrology and then before you know it, you're talking about how it really like your boy, what sign your boyfriend is, and then you talking about your relationship. And you could. You're having exactly the same conversation you would be having in a bar, but without the booze.

Yes. Yeah. For me, when I first moved to LA, I would go on meetup.com and I would type in the word shaman and I would like go to random people's houses and we would like go around the fire and do shamanic gatherings. And that's just how I met people.

Exactly, exactly. So I think kind of like re. Just kind of like reframing what your. What constitutes a social life or like a night out. You know, a night out. Because can be so many different things. Socializing can happen in so many different ways. And oftentimes a lot of these more kind of like mystical workshops, they're designed to get people to open up and share and like be authentically them. And so you end up, I have found, making really deep connections very fast with people because people are going there and they're being really authentic and they're being really unselfconscious and they're really kind of like just showing up as them full selves.

Yes. And one event that I wish to. I had gone to, hopefully you do it again, is the storytelling event that you and Alex hosted. Oh, I love it.

It's my favorite.

Can you tell us a little bit about what that is?

Yes. So story, story medicine. It's funny. Like, the more I. The more my book is out there and the bigger the numinous gets I'm often asked, come and do a workshop at our space. And my response has always been, I'm not a teacher. I don't have anything to teach. Like, I'm not a professional astrologer. I. I'm not a tarot reader. Like, what can I come and teach? And I've realized that throughout my life, my medicine, my field has been storytelling, whether it's been through journalism or it's been through writing my book, you know. And so I came up with a workshop idea that was literally just that. It was an open sharing circle for people to come and share their stories. And I love it so, so much. I've been hosting them with Alexandra. I did another one with another friend called Alexandra here in New York as well. And we just set a theme and invite people to share a story from their life on that theme. So it could be something deep and dark and difficult, but it could equally be a love story or something funny or just whatever it is on that theme. And we just go around the circle and people jump in as they feel called to, and everybody else we invite to, you know, just really offer the gift of very deep, compassionate listening and to remember and be cognizant of the fact that that's the other. The other vital component to any kind of sharing situation is the listening and the receiving of it.

That, to me, sounds better than any movie, any tv. Like, that's because people have so much to offer.

This is the thing. Like, why are we all so. Why do we all love the movies? Why could. Why do we all have to binge on Netflix? We love to see people's stories because witnessing other people's stories allows us to see ourselves. It becomes like a mirror for situations in our own lives. And it reminds us how similar we all are. Like, how we can all on the outside look so different, apparently have such different lives, etc. Etc. But we all, as humans, share common experiences, and they are expressed in different ways in our lives. And just hearing them can be so comforting and it can be so unifying. And so honestly, going around these circles with people sharing their stories, it's so emotional. It's so. It's just beauty. It's just beautiful because for me, it's so simple. Like, there's nothing. We don't have to, like, study for years or learn anything. We're just showing up and being ourselves. And that in and of itself is enough. And that is incredibly healing for both the people sharing their stories and for the people listening to the stories. So. So, yeah, it's something I definitely want to do more of.

I love that. And it's something that anyone can set up wherever they live. Just grab four or five friends and pick a theme. Like I know you said the last one was like summer love or something.

Yeah.

And just pick a theme. And even your friends that you might have known your whole life, they probably have a story you've never heard.

Exactly, exactly. So I love that. I think it's that thing as well, isn't it? Like we don't, we don't necessarily spend the time when we're thinking about socializing or getting together with friends to put any kind of like ritual or intention around that, when actually we can do so much self healing and healing of each other and we can find such deeper connection with our, with our friends when we really kind of choose to show up in an intentional way. It just adds this extra layer of intimacy and commitment, I suppose, pose that really. That really is extremely bonding and extremely connecting. So, yes, I would highly recommend a story at a story medicine evening in your homes.

I love that. And this is the perfect segue into Moon Club, which I'm a member of. And I'm going to be doing a little event at, for the Moon club on the 29th, I think. And I'm so excited to share my story about, about how Moon Club has helped me. It helps me meet Sa, which helps me meet Deepak. And it has been just so instrumental. And if it wasn't for you putting Moon Club together, like literally it wouldn't have happened. So thank you for creating it and shining your light.

Yeah, I'm so happy that you can do that. And we definitely want to do that more with our members. I think when we started, I mean, obviously, you know, Alexandra and I are the creators and the founders and the hosts of Moon Club, but our whole mission really is to empower other people to step into these kind of like to their own leadership roles in their communities, whatever that might mean, look like, you know. And so I think we want to hand over more of this space to our members to really kind of like show that we're all equal participants in this. We're all co creating this experience together, you know. So.

Yeah.

Thank you. Thank you. I'm excited for what you're going to share.

Yes, me too. And you extended the invitation for listeners can come join so they can email me and I can add them to the list and they can get a little taste of what being in the Moon Club is like.

Absolutely, absolutely.

Yay. Great. Well, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and all of the hard work that went behind this book. I know you need a vacation so badly, and luckily tomorrow you're. You're going off for one, so have so much fun in Europe.

Thank you so much. I'm really excited. It was lovely speaking to you today, and I know we're gonna hang out in person again before long.

Yes. And let me know when you do another event here. And I'm just so excited to just collaborate with you more in the future. So where can everyone find you?

The Numinous is the hyphen numinous.com it's spelled like luminous, but with an n. And my Instagram is the underscore numinous, which I'm pretty active on, as we discussed. And, yeah, my personal website is rubywarington.com the book is Material Girl, Mystical World, and it's everywhere good books are sold. I could direct you to Amazon, but also, please, if you have an indie bookstore near you, please support and see if they've got it too. But yes. So I'm all over the place, really. I'm as out there as I could be.

Yay. Well, thank you so much again for sharing your wisdom. And if people have questions, they'll reach out to you. And if they want to become Moon Club members, they can get a little taste at the webinar and then just sign up through the new club.

Amazing. Yes. And Moon Club, if you want to read more about it. In the meantime, it's just moonclub Co is our homepage, which will give you information about the club.

Perfect. Great. Well, have a beautiful rest of your day.

Thank you, Sahara. You too.

Bye.

Bye. Touching, touching. Like a touching, touching.