095: The Rise of Women with Danette May

Namaste, it's Sahara Rose. And welcome back to the Highest Self podcast, a place where we discuss what makes you your soul's highest evolvement. I am really feeling like my highest evolvement. I just came back from almost three weeks in Bali, got eight engaged. If you didn't see that on my Instagram, head over there and you'll hear the whole story. And I'm definitely going to do a podcast episode just on that over here and really just feeling amazing. I've been working on my fourth book now, which is a book on Ayurvedic entrepreneurship, which I've mentioned throughout the podcast, but now is really coming to life. Most of the material has been written, so now going to be editing it, putting into chapters all the work that goes into putting a book. And I have another project underway, which I'm going to keep a secret for now because I want you guys to be radically surprised. So all good things coming and excited to share this all with you. And today's episode is all about the rise of woman. And I'm seeing everywhere around me, women really just stepping up into their power. And it makes me just so elated that we chose to incarnate at this time where women are just taking, you know, a major shift and realizing how many gifts and innate intuitive powers we have inside of ourselves. And instead of repressing them or being afraid of them or thinking that they're weak or anything else, we are just embodying them. And it's not just woman. It's that more feminine energy in general, which I like to call more vata energy, more kapha energy. But it is that more creative, which would be connected to the vata or that more earthy and mama energy connected to the kapha. But there's also pitta, feminine energy, which is the strength, the warrior rest, the Durga, the mother who lifts up a truck to help her kid under. So in this episode with Danette, may we talk all about the rise of woman. She shares with us her new book called the Rise, and her event called the Rise Denver, which is taking place October 12th to 14th, if you guys want to check that out. But we talk all about this major shift that is happening. So. So first, let me tell you about our two sponsors, and then we're gonna get a little bit into the shift. Our first sponsor is, you know, my fave, Ayurveda. Ayurveda is an Ayurvedic supplement formula that merges ancient Ayurvedic herbs like Triphala and Brahmi with modern Vitamins and minerals that we all need. They formulate their packets that you can take every day. So it's not like you have to put together a bunch of different vitamins together and it's like, like this old grandma container that you travel around with. Or maybe that was just me, but it is in these little packets and they have mood formula immunity joints digestion. I take the mood formula every day. I've spoken about it on the podcast. Adrenal fatigue was something that I was diagnosed with at the end of the year last year. Major stress, writing books, doing all the things, and it really helped with my adrenal fatigue. So you can check it out on Uvada. Y-O u v e d a.com use the coupon code Sahara and you will receive 35% off your first month's order. Our second sponsor is Four Sigmatic. Four Sigmatic is a delicious mushroom elixir company, which I am so excited. They just created two Ayurvedic flavors. One is their chai latte mix. It is like just crack on earth, like if you love chai but you don't drink it too much because the ones at Starbucks or whatever are full of sugar. This chai has 1 gram of sugar in total and it uses coconut sugar and steam stevia, like a blend of the two with coconut milk powder. And it literally is so delicious. And you can just pour it into water and because of the coconut milk powder, it's still really like, like a creamy chai. I use mostly water with like a splash of flax milk with the chai packet. It is delicious. They also have a really amazing mushroom hot cacao mix which, you know, if you're like me, you're weaning off of chocolate. I highly recommend going for it. So you can find it on four Sigmatic. F O U R S S I G M a t I c.com Sahara and you will receive 15% off any order and you'll see my favorites on that website over there. So you can pick and choose and see which elixirs vibe with you. Okay, so let's get back into this shift that's been happening in the podcast that I did that was right after the new year called why we are All Waking Up. I speak a lot about the year 2012. And the year 2012 was sort of this catalyst year as we shifted energies into what they call the Aquarian era. It is a more Shakti time period, what that means. Shakti is sort of the divine feminine nature, but it is a period that We've transitioned from this patriarchal era, which was very defined by, like, structure and competition and who's at top and climbing the corporate ladder and, like, stepping on each other's toes to get there. And that. That's why so many wars and poverty and chaos, as well as industrial revolution, agricultural revolution, all happened during the patriarchal era. But 2012, we shifted into the more Aquarian, the more feminine era. And this is when the Internet really took hold. And with the Internet, I speak about this a lot on the podcast, but it's inherently very vata and in the feminine, so it allows for collaboration and creativity. And on the Internet, it's like, you. You will become more successful if you collaborate with more people. Collaboration over competition is the way forward. So in this episode, we talk a lot about what is this shift and what was Danette's story to get there. So we speak about how she lost her son, how she only had $45 to her name, and that, you know, real breakdown point gave her the awakening that she needed. And we speak about a lot of things, like how to become friends with other women, even if you're. You've been a tomboy your whole life. Because a lot of women, I know, they're like, I don't know, I don't really trust other women, especially because maybe as a kid, you were bullied by women or tormented by them or never felt like a part of them. So you have a difficulty finding, like, your tribe. But we speak about the importance of that and how doesn't matter what your history is with women as women, we need people of our same gender. And it's really just this historical thing. If you look back, the men were more the hunters and women were more of the gatherers, though there are definitely some female hunters in different societies. But the woman tended to gather and organize and group together, and they would sit in circle and, you know, peel the corn or de seed the nuts or crack the nuts and things like that. And they would share and they would talk, and they would say, well, what's going on with you and how are you doing and how are your kids and how's your family life? And this is how we therapized each other. You know, I don't know if that's even a verb therapized. That's how we gave therapy to each other. And now, because of this Internet, which is an inherently feminine thing, it's also led to disconnection. And disconnection has sometimes taken away the point of social media, the point of Social media is so you can collaborate and connect with more people, but it's sort of turned into this, like, bulletin board of, like, look at me at my highest moment. And here's this inspirational quote, and there isn't much substance to it. And that leaves us feeling alone because we feel like, oh, my God, everyone else has their shit together and I don't. And that leads to mental health issues. Depression. Depression, anxiety, which is huge topic that I talk a lot about on the podcast. And I just confirmed I'll be speaking at the Anxiety Summit in New York in November. So I'm really looking forward to that. But huge crisis happening these days. I mean, we've seen the recent suicides of two major public figures, Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. So we don't have tribe and we don't have connection with other people. Whether it's our gender or the opposite gender or trigender or no gender, anything, animals, plants, we need connection. And when we connect, when we hold hands, we all rise up. So without further ado, let's welcome Danette May to the Highest Self Podcast. Namaste. Welcome Danette to the Highest Self Podcast. It's so great to have you here.

I'm excited to be here.

So the first question that I would love to ask you is, what makes you your highest self?

Wow, that's a good question. What makes me my highest self? I would say my vulnerability. When I'm willing to be radically vulnerable and remove masks, remove layers that I'm trying to protect myself, or put off an illusion that may not necessarily be how I feel or where I'm at, then I'm actually going to be in the quickest and the highest expression of who I am, as well as when I monitor my energy space. So when I continue to own my. My energy and when I say own is really knowing that I am the one who gets to decide the energy I hold inside myself, which is. Makes me a more bigger manifester in the fullest expression of who I am when I hold a higher energy space.

Both are so true. And today I was just posting about boundaries and how, like, boundaries are the most important asset to your spiritual practice because it's in that saying no where you really get to say yes to yourself.

Ooh, that's good.

Yes. So beautiful. Well, speaking of vulnerability, I would love for you to share with audience members your story and how you got to where you are today.

Yeah. So, you know, I feel like my story is everybody's story. It's just. And everybody's story Is my story and you truly, we can all find these messages inside of our stories. And I'm gonna go back just to about seven years ago, because I feel like every one of us has a refiner's moment. And when I think of a refiner's moment, it's a refiner's fire. It's where we actually get to be molded into the fullest expression of who we are. And usually this refiner's fire, it feels like fire. It's like we're becoming that amazing glass or diamond in the making. And it can feel hot and it can feel hard, and it can feel like things are not turning out, but they're actually coming out in the fullest expression for who you are. So mine, you know, I grew up, I was only girl, four brothers, very much a tomboy, big into movement and running around and sports and things like that. And when I got into what I thought was my first career, I was like, I know I'm going to be a personal trainer. Like, I went into pre med and I went into nutrition, but I was like, I just want to get people out of the hospital, and I want to do. And I thought I knew everything about movement and food and, like, just being high. And then I found myself when I lost my son, literally laying in bed for about three months with severe depression. And it was an aha moment for me because I had never been in that state. And I finally really understood what that felt like to be in this questioning of who I am. Can I listen to a. You'll have to read my book to really know how I lost my son and how I got to that point. Point. But I was in that space of questioning who I am and can I even listen to my own inner voice and what is that inner voice? And how do I even get out of this bed? You know, it started what came of my life and my message today, which I took from my mess, was I finally went for a walk around the block, and I cracked open my heart on that walk. And I truly understood at a very deep cellular level, the power of movement and healing. I had always kind of said, oh, movement heals depression, and movement's fun, and movement's good for the body. And I was like, wait a minute, There's a deeper message here. We all have this given ability to move, and it's actually our gift to tap into our spirits. So I was on a mission to move in a different way and move for healing. And then I started to awaken more to this idea of Healing foods. And I just started, like, unraveling all these, like, healing foods. Like, I was devouring it because I just wanted to learn more. And I was finding that these foods, if I just ate, like, a few of them, like, it wasn't even like, I had to create a massive concoction. I was like, oh, my gosh, I'm starting to wake up. I'm starting to, like, feel better than I've ever felt before. The brain fog is leaving me. And I started to truly understand the power of healing foods. Watching my body transform, my mind, my spiritual level. And then I really dove into the power of the mind and the power of really the words we speak and the people we associate with. And that's kind of been my journey. And so now my programs are worldwide and have about 1.7 million people on my email list that subscribe to my daily newsletters and a lot of followers on Facebook that I get the opportunity to really share about these three pillars, which I'm so passionate about. And it's expand onto other things which we can talk on later on in the show.

That's so beautiful and such a true testament of making your mess your message. And I think the universe exactly gives you what you need to really embody whatever, you know, the thing it is that you're preaching. So if you were saying like, oh, movement heals, it's like, okay, let's give you an experience to really see that movement heals.

Totally, totally beautiful.

And then how did that shift now into women's empowerment work, which is such a big part of what you do today?

Yeah, I'm really passionate about women, and women in particular, because I believe that we're the most underutilized resource that society has, that if women stepped fully into their grace and into their power and their voice, we could shift the planet for good. And I feel that there's this missing link, almost this missing link of loving who we are in the now, loving ourselves in the now body, in the now relationship, in the now finances. And if we can love ourselves in the now shadow, in the now light, in the now beauty, whatever that is, and just really love all the different dimensions of ourselves and really step into that work, we are going to truly ripple effect what happens in society, how people show up, how we treat other people, how we connect with other people. And so I'm on a radical mission for that. And I know that self love doesn't just come from reading a book or being like, I'm going to say, affirmations in the mirror. There's many ways to tap into increased self love and I believe movement does that. Movement has a way of really unraveling the negative and helping you tap into your heart space. I know food has a way of doing it and I also know that the mind work has a way. So all three together, depending on who you are as an individual and like what you talk about, your dosha, each one's going to resonate different for you to tap into that love molecule for yourself so you can start raveling into more and more and more self love.

So beautiful. And I absolutely agree. Self love is something that. It's like an inner practice. It's something you have to cultivate through. Just like showing up on that yoga mat, at that gym, on that running trail, eating food like this. I feel like in society we've almost think like self love is only taking baths or only doing this, like expensive massage. And it's just showing up for yourself every day.

Yep. Truly. And showing up for yourself, especially when you don't want to show up for yourself. And that's that vulnerability piece is it's like, I don't feel like showing up for myself today, but I'm going to do it and just owning it and being like, but I'm going to step in. You know, I don't feel like brushing my teeth today, but I'm going to still brush my teeth. Right. So it's like, it's simple like that.

Absolutely. And what do you recommend for people who are at that place of like, I know it's good for me, but I don't have time or it just seems like such an effort.

Oh, I think that as soon as you say you don't have time, that's when you need to make time. And I know there's a quote about meditation with that. It's like as soon as you're like, I don't have time for meditation, that's when you need it the most. If you truly want to live a life of happiness, a life of gratitude, a life of like juicing out all the goodness of life right through adventure, through these like dynamic relationships, or living into the a career or a mission that's beating in your heart. It is absolutely fundamental at the chorus level to really step into fundamental work around love each and every day. And it doesn't have to be long, it doesn't have to be hard, but it does need to get done each day. I call it small hinge work. It's the small hinges move big doors. You know how we have Three hinges on a big door. And it's just those little hinges are moving that door. And the same goes for your life. If you can do three things each day that are really your rituals or your just the practices that you cultivate, you will swing your door of life in the biggest direction possible.

So, so, so true. And when you love yourself and you take care of yourself, you show up as a more, you know, whole person for everyone else you interact with.

Yes, absolutely. You are a factor. You basically are giving other people permission to light up as well. So you are making a difference. Your biggest contribution to the planet is your energy, like your willingness to be happy, your willingness to love yourself no matter what. And you give everyone else permission to do the same.

Absolutely. And a lot of your event coming up and all your work is about women coming together. And it's been such a game changer for me, especially over the past year. But a lot of women I talk to feel like they either can't find women around them who they can connect with, or they'd rather be by themselves. So what do you recommend for really finding that sisterhood?

Well, let me first just say I'm gonna get so vulnerable. I have always been the girl that never really girlfriends. So I used to walk around and be like, I don't need girlfriends. Like, I'm just that tomboy and I'm that girl that really doesn't need it because I had to speak that to myself, that lie, so that I felt better about my current situation. It felt better to just do that. And I think a lot of us do this, like, especially if we're really good at it, we can like totally convince ourselves. For me, what I realized and it kind of started happening in 2012. And I don't know how woo, woo. I can get on here, but I.

Total bring it out.

But I know, like, I feel it in my cells. And I've done some additional work on it because I looked it up because I'm like, there is a movement happening. Like 2012. There was this time. And anyone who's listening, like, look back on your life in 2012. What was going on during that time frame. Most of us were either going through like calamity, like chaos, losing a job, figuring out, getting out of a relationship. Some of us got cancer or different diseases. You know, some of us were like, oh gosh, I want a new way. Like, I'm not going to practice this religion anymore. Like, I'm feeling something's different for me. And there was an awakening happening on a Global scale with women in particular, where we knew there was a time when we actually needed to connect deeper than we've ever connected before. But before we can connect with one another, we knew on a cellular level, on a soul level, we had to start connecting with ourselves. So in mass chaos comes the opportunity to connect with yourself. Right? So here I was, sleeping on the floor on a mattress, $47 to my name, single mother literally raveling in my mess. Right? But that was my gift to get truly clear on my rise. What am I going to do to rise up into myself? Because I can either stay here, but this is miserable, or I can start to rise into what my heart and my cells and my soul is speaking to me. That's the desire. I think we feel this desire to connect and we can, and everyone is desiring it. Truthfully, I think if anyone's listening to this and following you, Sarah, they know this. Like there's a deeper conversation and a deeper, like, I almost think it's a soul contract that we all have to say, we're going to come together. We're going to come together in our mess, we're going to come together in our brilliance and we're going to come for a higher conversation.

Yes. Preach, sister. And I'm so glad you brought that up. I've done an entire 2012 episode on here, so my listeners are like, yeah, of course 2012 is the year. But it was such a transformative awakening and transformation into being multi dimensional beings. And we all felt it whether we were aware of it or not. And the world is just so radically different in 2012. And as well as the Internet, which is a divinely feminine, you know, tool that we all have, the spreading of information and you know, you're in Colorado right now and I'm in California. We're communicating. So it's like getting on the right side of that instead of resisting it.

Yes, absolutely, yes.

So what do you recommend for the people who can't find the tribe, they can't find the girls.

Well, for one, I think just saying that if you're one of those girls like I was, it's like I don't either need tribe or I don't need girlfriends or they're hard to find. Really watch your language because truly ask yourself this, do I want to be with empowered, beautiful soul, edifying friends? And if the answer is yes, because you don't want to just talk about the weather or your hair or your nails, you're ready to go deep, then you're wanting that and that's okay to want it. So just watch your language of saying it's hard or it's not possible or it's just not in my town or it's not, you know, in my. I'm too busy. Whatever the language is. Just really watch that. Because then you're basically attracting that. So the first thing is really proclaiming it, just owning it, just being vulnerable and saying, I would love to meet other women that want to go deep and raw and real and that want to lift each other up and to also celebrate when we're at our highest of highs. So just claiming it's first. Right. Number two, I say you visualize it. Because when you visualize and you just take like 30 seconds to just see yourself in the circle, what does that feel like? What does that look like to be with those type of women? That fills you up. Whatever fills you up, you know, like, what are you doing together? What does that feel like? What are those conversations when you do that? You let the universe, God source know you're ready. You're ready to go. You're ready to, like, receive this in your life. And then next step, just be open. Like, if you see somebody or you feel called to reach out to someone online, then do it. Reach out and maybe say hello. Or if someone asks you to go do something, check in. Because if you're doing the visualization, then it's going to happen. So that's your opportunity.

Yeah. So as soon as you just sort of say it out to the universe, like, I'm ready to go raw and deep and make these real friends, I think, yeah. As you're saying, they'll just show up and it's just a matter of you taking that step and saying yes and, you know, walking up to a stranger at the party and not feeling nervous about it.

Totally. Yeah. And I know you're going to get to this, but I definitely would say put yourself in environments where it's like the norm to meet other people and where it's the norm to be vulnerable and to be unstripped and to be unlayered and to be like, everyone knows they're coming in in a container of raw vulnerability. They're coming together in a higher conversation. Get yourself in those circles. And there are events and there's mine event and there's other events where this is the contract, this is where people are coming together and that's where you want to be.

Absolutely, yes. And you know when you're in that space that everyone is coming together for connection, for Consciousness. Every single person there is, your sister is already your friend. You already have so much in common that it's gonna, like, eliminate like 99% of the, like, guessing games.

Totally, absolutely, yes.

And. And luckily now I'm seeing all around the country more and more of these, like, events and workshops and masterclasses are popping up. But I feel like people still, oftentimes I'm seeing, they feel scared to show up in person. And this is a real thing. They feel, you know, it's. I'm sure you're having this experience, even promoting your event. Like, so many people feel really comfortable on the Internet, but when it comes to going somewhere, sleeping in another bed, being by yourself in a new environment, it's really scary. So what advice do you have for people who feel kind of too introverted for events?

Yeah, and I am actually an introvert, so I get it. So we have an event coming up called the Rise, and it's really, it's a women's event where women are coming together in this conversation, in this unlayering, in this grace, and also this willingness to stand in their full potential and their power and all these speakers and performers. Right. What I found and what I feel, and I'm going to just speak to you guys right now, is that it's one thing to be connected long distance, because then we can still hide, we can still somewhat feel protected because we can use the excuse of, well, they never fully saw me. Right. I never really had to fully express myself. And this is all very, very subconscious. We have, as women have felt the need to be protective of ourselves. There has been really horrific things in our past that have led us to feel that way. Backstabbing of women, you burning up the stake. I mean, there's a lot of things, and even in our own families today, maybe you felt that with your sister or a friend growing up or even your mother. So all of a sudden, when you say, I'm going to fly and meet eye to eye and belly to belly with other women and I'm going to fully unlayer, your subconscious is going to be like, no, you're not. Because then you're being fully exposed. Right? So what if you show up and you fully express and you're there in the raw and the flesh and you don't get seen or you don't connect, then what? Right? That's the fear. That's the underlying subconscious fear of what if I'm not seen? What if I don't connect? And that's a real fear. And every single person, even the ones you look at that you're like, they can make friends with a fly. Like, they are the most extroverted person. They are feeling that fear of a live event, but they still show up. And the truth is, you get to show up even though there's that fear, even though there's that subconscious story. And that subconscious story doesn't usually say that if you get deep, it will, but it usually goes, I'm too busy. That's too expensive. That's probably not a program for me. I actually don't like that speaker. But your soul's like, please, you saw this. I want you to come. But you have to rationalize it to make it work in your logical brain. But really look at your deep underlying shell. And this is where all winners, really successful people do is they go, wow, what is the deeper message that's going on here? What is that de. Subconscious messaging going on? And usually there's fear, and it's about being seen or not feeling enough, or, what if I'm exposed? Or what if I'm too much in the spotlight? These are deep, deep, subconscious fears. Look at it. And then if that is it, that's your invitation to step in and go. That's where the magic's gonna actually happen.

Yes. Full body resonation with that. And it's. It's so true. Like, I'm also very introverted person. No. People would probably not guess on this podcast, but it's still scary for you, for me, for all of us to, like, walk up to a stranger. Like when we walked up to each other. Like, we're both really nervous when we talk anyways, because that's the only way you're gonna make more connections and grow. And, you know, just. It's like, when you're on stage, it's like, imagine the audience is naked. Like, imagine everyone is naked and awkward and nervous. Cause that's actually the case.

Oh, it's so true. And I was just at an event where I was actually the speaker, and they had the VIP night before the event. And I, like, walked in and I was so nervous. And I'm like, I'm the speaker. Like, I'm not supposed to be nervous, but I'm so nervous. And that's just. That's the human nature. Because the ego knows magic is about to happen. The ego knows you're going to connect with someone or you're going to have an unlayering of just connecting to yourself. How powerful is that? And so it's going to create all these Nerves, Right. That makes you want to just not go. But that's where the success lies, is going. I'm going to step in no matter if I feel that fear, no matter what.

Yes. I love how you mentioned soul contracts because I truly believe at events, people with soul contracts are all there in the same space and time. And now it's your free will if you're going to go up to them or not. But then if you do, it's like this catalyst of events that will happen afterwards. So can you tell us maybe for people who don't know what a soul contract is and your take on that?

Yeah, I think that there's not one right way to have a take on a soul contract. So my interpretation of it is, you know, I don't believe this is our one and only life. I just don't. I believe that there have been many of us, like, thousands of us who have walked together in a. Maybe a different life, a different experience. You know, some people might call it heaven, some people might call it a different life. I don't really get too caught up in those logistics, but I do know that there are times when I'm not. Times a lot when I, like, see someone. Even you, Sahar. Like, when I see them and I'm like, I know them, like, and I don't know how I know them, but I know them, you know, like, if you really, like, you're like, there's something in their eyes. There's something in the energy. And I feel there's thousands of us that have this. Where we have walked together. We said, hey, I'll find you again. And this is the time, like, I feel this is a time when we all are meant to come together eye to eye, belly to belly. Especially when this world is making it easier than ever not to. But it's really important that we do because we agreed on a soul level, our souls are like dying to get us all in a room. Like, dying for the party to start. The souls coming together.

Absolutely, yes. And, yeah, I think a lot of us lightworkers or whatever you want to call it, we all incarnated in this lifetime, in this day and space to shift the vibration of what's happening right now. And we've been given these tools like the Internet and social media, et cetera, to utilize them.

Totally. Totally.

Yes. So it's an exciting time. I think it's the best time ever to be alive. People, People get frustrated by. But it's like, dude, today, I mean, imagine being born, like, during the witch Trials. Like, we're so lucky that we can even speak freely about these things.

I know. That's why it's time.

Yes, absolutely. So people who want to tribe going to events now, you. I know you and Lori were both in her mastermind and she's spoken about this on the podcast. So can you talk a little bit about, like, what people can do at home to kind of foster sisterhood and trust?

Yeah, I can speak to what I did. Lori's book that came out, A Tribe Called Bliss, stemmed from me reaching out to Lori and Lindsay to form a mastermind. I did not know them. I knew of them, I knew their name, but I did not know them personally. Like, I had maybe exchanged a couple sentences.

So just from social media.

Yes.

Wow.

And so that's where it really starts is that one asking. I felt in my heart that I needed to come together in a mastermind with women. And I was feeling very isolated. I was running my business alone. I didn't have any girlfriends I was hanging out with at all. Mother, wife. But I knew on a soul level. You just know I'm meant to have these deep, raw conversations and not just to have them, but to grow into my expression in my business and my relationship and relationship with myself. I said, please show me. And so I would sit in meditation and ask to be shown or a name to come up or. And I was just being very hyper aware of what came up. And I remember Lori's name came up and I was like, oh, my gosh, I don't really know her, but that one makes sense because we're kind of aligned on our mission. So I just texted her. Like, I. I don't know how I had her, even her text number, because we weren't texters, we weren't friends. But I was like, would you like to do a mastermind with me? That's amazing. She was like. And I was like, with one other girl, you don't even know who she is. And she was like, thinking, oh, sure, I guess so. And the other girl didn't know who Lindsay or Lori was. And I didn't even really know who this other girl was either, but her name came up in a meditation. So I reached out to her and then we agreed on this time and we stick what. We just came on a call and we set down the ground rules. If we're going to connect twice a month, we're going to connect on this day and time and. And we are going to unleash all of us. We're not going to hold back. We're going to give whatever we can to each other if someone needs something, and we're going to just form something different. And that's where it all started.

Wow, that's amazing. And it turned into her book and your event and your upcoming book, and so many things just came out of you being brave enough to send two strangers a message.

Yeah, that's what it takes a lot of time. Some of you guys already have the contacts. You just need to form the container of raw vulnerability for others like me. You do just have to reach out to somebody that you feel like on a soul level, like, let's do this. And it may not work out and you can start over again. I don't know. Ours just did. I've never tried again. Like, I'm good with just one, but, yeah, I don't know. I think that's what it takes is just listening and then acting.

Totally. And like, I've tried doing it with some of my friends and, you know, then one person's traveling and this person has a work deadline, and then we never end up sticking to it. So what do you guys do to make yourselves stay consistent with it?

Well, that is a good question, Sarah, because if you. Since you know Lindsay, I don't know if you know Lindsay, but Lori and I, like, Lindsay and I, we've lived in two to three other countries during this time of doing this mastermind. We try. I travel international all the time. Lindsay's currently living in Costa Rica, happens to be in Italy right now. And Lori travels a lot, but not the same as Lindsay and I because we're international travelers. We just made a pact that this was so important for our growth that it didn't. Like, we were sometimes flexible on the international travel, but we didn't skip the week. We just maybe moved the time around on that particular day. But a lot of times, especially when I lived in Bali, I was on calls at 4am Just to be committed to these women. And when we were in Croatia, like, I was on calls at 9pm Missing the party. Because I'm committed to this mastermind. And that's what it takes is saying all three of you or four or five, we're committed to this time. Like, yeah, we're gonna be traveling during this time, or we're gonna be up in the middle of the night possibly during this time. But are we committed to it?

Absolutely. And for people who are like, well, I'm not sure if I'm committed, what are the benefits that you've gotten from it?

Oh, my gosh. All three of us would tell you this, but like Lori, for example, since she's already been on, like, her book came from this. We. We were listening to her talk about writing her book. We held her accountable to writing her book. We held her accountable to all her events. We were the ones there for her when she wanted to throw the towel in on her event. Same with me. They have helped me with growing just different business ideas. When I had questions that formed my business expansion for me, I took more risks because I knew that if I failed, I still had female friends that loved me no matter what. I didn't have to be anything to be loved by them. And that made me feel like I could try harder for those big, audacious goals.

That's so beautiful. And it's such an amazing space to have to just, like, share and, like, brag and to be like, this is going really well for me and I'm doing this. And I feel like what happens sometimes in female friendships is we try to dim our own lights because we don't want to make that other friend feel uncomfortable. But then it turns into, like, both parties just dimming their lights for no reason.

Totally. So that is a good point, because I am so big on that. Like, I think a lot of times women can come together, and it feels a little good to either have a problem or something to muse on. Right? A problem. Like, there's times when we need to be there in our falls. Like, I've watched a lot of evolution between Lindsay, Laurie, and I of just low, low moments and then the really high. Like someone got a book deal or someone just started and had a really successful. We all will get on a call and do a kombucha or a champagne toast. And if someone can't be on that call, they will totally send the emoji. There's this feeling of actually when anything goes well, we want to tell the other because we don't feel like they're going to judge us or feel like they can't shine as bright because everyone's ebbing and flowing. There will be times when Lindsay's just kicking butt and I'm not. But I love to celebrate that with her because we know that her win is actually all of our. So it feels really good. It's like, actually, it feels like when Lindsay and Laurie are, like, doing amazing things, I'm like, oh, that's mine too. So I just get to have endless celebrations.

Totally. Yes. I think it's so important for us to see one other people's success as a possibility that we can do it too. And then also the second part is also just being happy for that person doing it. Because then I feel like sometimes it turns into you're just happy for people because it inspires. Inspires you to do it. But you can also just be happy for someone and maybe that isn't something that you're ever going to do.

Totally. Yeah. But, yeah, their win is yours. Like, we're all mirrors of each other. So yeah, you may not ever do it, but you can pretend you did it.

Yes. And how do you deal in female friendships that there may be some, like, underlying jealousy currents going on?

I actually don't entertain any friendship relationships that bring me down vibrationally. I just don't. I've kind of come to a space and maybe I've heard of women coming to it at age 50, but I guess I got there a little earlier. I just am like, you know, I'm so mission driven and I'm so really, I care more about my connection with myself than anyone else. Like, and I know that might sound really selfish, but I really like. And that's what this rise event is about. Like, I know you're going to connect with other people, but if I can get you to connect with yourself, I can get you to be you, to become your best friend. And I know I completed my task because for me, I'm committed to myself, number one, and to the love I feel for myself and my vibration. And if I feel that there's a friend in my life that's jealous or trying to bring me down with energy, then it's just not the right friend for me. It just isn't. So I don't have time for that, for what I feel I'm meant to do here on this planet. So I, I don't. I would maybe if they were a deep, deep friend, I might have a conversation with them first to give them a benefit of the doubt, to just be really full and vulnerable and say that hurts, you know, and be open too, without giving them a chance. Because usually that's just. They feel insecure. But then that can get remedied. And if it doesn't after that, then it's probably not a friendship that's going to last a long time.

Yes, absolutely. I think it's important for us to really, you know, sometimes we have, have a friend and it's just out of convenience. And you grew up together, your kids are friends and you've known each other, you work out at the same gym but, like, is it best serving you? And I think it's really hard, especially when you don't have other friend options, to let go of that friend, even when you know they're probably not really inspiring you to be your highest self. Because the other alternative is to not have friends. But I find it's better to just not have friends and work your way from the ground up than to waste your time on friendships that are not serving.

Absolutely. I agree. And I think, too, you open more space. You teach people how they're going to treat you and really how you're going to treat yourself. So if you let go of a friendship, and it doesn't mean it has to be mean or it has to be nasty, it just means you don't spend as much time or you don't engage as much, and that just frees you up to engage with someone else or engage with yourself.

Absolutely, yes. Again, every no is a yes to yourself. And female friendships are so important. And I think that, you know, your book and your event are so timely because we are all realizing that we can't do this on our own. It's too much. We're not meant to do this on our own. And it's so much more enjoyable with friends and sisters and tribe.

Yes, it is. It is. We're meant to have fun, too.

Yeah. So can you tell us a little bit more about your event and your upcoming book and how we can get connected with you?

Oh, thank you. I am really excited to connect with everybody. And so the book and the event is both called the Rise. So I had gotten the call to do this event on the mountain. I was hiking, and I had no plans. It was never on my vision board. I was not planning to do a large event like I'm doing, and it's in Denver at the convention center in October. And I know Sahara will leave a link, but I was just like, I remember so clearly. You're supposed to do this event. And actually, this was the smallest of all the events. If you do, you know, like, you're supposed to bring women together and bring them together in a remembrance, a cellular remember remembrance. And at the same time, after I declared I was doing the event, I secured the convention center. I got, like, a call with Reed Tracy, he's the CEO of Hay House, and he said, can I meet with you? And I was like, the CEO wants to meet with me. What? And we sat down and talked, and I shared my personal rise. Like me rising in all of my muck with $47 to my name, losing my child, the business I'm running today, all the in between. And he was like, I would love to do a book deal with you.

Wow.

And I was like, oh, my gosh. You know, but if you work with a publishing house, they usually say 18 months. And they were like, can you fast track this? Can you write this book in six weeks so we can have it at the same time for your event? And I feel that this is all really divine timing because we're coming together as women. I'm coming together, bringing these women together so that we have use our voice. I believe our voice is our most powerful tool. We have to come together in a new conversation and unlayering and vulnerability. And then I've got the book, which is all about all the hidden stories that I have yet told, all of how I went from 47, what got me to 47, how I lost my son to all the in betweens, to my rise, to my ultimate rise, and me still rising, like, just that whole journey and just using my voice, being raw and vulnerable and sharing exactly how the reader can also do their own individual rise. And anyway, so it's super timely. I know it's super divine. And that's what this is all about.

That is so beautiful. And I can only imagine how all in you had to go for those six weeks to get the book done. I'm sure it was a crazy but really exciting time in your life.

Yeah, super crazy, but super good.

Of course. And, you know, sometimes having a deadline for your book is the. The best thing because then you can't make excuses and you just have to get it done.

I hope so. Yes.

Well, thank you so much for sharing all of your wisdom with us, your vulnerability, your story, and all of the wins along the way. And I think it will really inspire every listener to know that they too, can rise and connect and they don't have to be afraid of introducing themselves to someone or dming them to start a mentorship tribe. And thank you for just being that example.

Oh, you're welcome. You're welcome.

And I'll post the link to your events and your upcoming book in the show notes, too.

Oh, thank you so much. I'm so excited to connect with everybody. Thank you so much for having me on Sahara. You're such a great light, and I just can't wait to connect with you even more.

Oh, thank you so much. Namaste. Oh, my God. How much did you love that interview with Danette? It is so important for us to have conversations like, like this for all of us. Women, men, children, cats, dogs, flies. We all need to come together and we need to discuss these major issues that we're facing every day. Because when we share and we allow ourselves to be vulnerable, that is how we connect and we build trust and we grow and we rise. So thank you Danette for sharing with us on the Highest Self podcast. And if you loved this episode, I would love to send you the first half of my unreleased book, never to be released book. Well, I don't know. I'll never say never, but it has no release date so far. It's called eat right for your mind body type and it has transitioned to my eat right for your body type 12 week program which you can find on my website iamsaharose.com so I will send the first half to you for free. Over 70 pages of amazing ayurvedic meets modern nutritional science information. All you gotta do is leave a review for this podcast on the iTunes store. Just go on the iTunes store, look up ratings and reviews, leave a beautiful review for me, screenshot it and email it over to me me at Sahara S A H A R A eat feel fresh.com and I will send you back free of charge the first half of my unreleased book eat right for your mind body type. Thank you guys so much for being here and I'll see you on the next episode. Namaste.