328: What To Do If You're Confused About Your Dharma with Sahara

Namaste, it's Sahara Rose. And welcome back to the highest self podcast, a place to discuss what makes you your soul's highest evolvement. I am so excited because finally my book, discover your Dharma is available for pre order. If you are moving through a big shift this year, which every single one of us is, you are going to receive so much from this book. It really allows you to access the truth of your soul, who you are, and then practically how to apply that into your life. What does that mean in terms of my career, my projects, my hobbies, my job, my everything. And your dharma is so much more than what you do, but really it's who you are. But our external reality won't shift until we know this. So discover your dharma is part of spiritual book of understanding the truth of your soul, but then also super pragmatic and action oriented. As you guys know who've listened to this podcast before, I'm very much about how are you going to apply this into the real world? It's not just about having a lofty idea. It's about how is this going to create a change not only for myself, but for humanity. And in this time where it can be very overwhelming on what to focus on with the news, with legislation, with politics, and all of these things happening in the world outside of us. The one thing that I've known to be true from being very involved in the political sphere is that we can only create change when we are in alignment with our purpose. And if you are not, you're actually not gonna see that thing through. It's just gonna become another idea that you have, another debate that you engage in another social media account that you follow, but doesn't actually create change. And I think we've seen this this year of like, how are we really going to make a difference? And that doesn come from, you know, dipping your toe into something and moving on. That comes from really committing yourself to something that is larger than you. And that doesn't have to be sacrificial, that doesn't have to be suffering. Your highest point of service is also your highest point of joy. So that's why you see me on Instagram and TikTok dancing and being silly and playful, because I'm embodying my purpose. And it doesn't have to be so serious. It can be playful. In fact, it's meant to be because it's meant to embody the full you. So I have been sharing excerpts from my new book, discover your Dharma as my solo cast on the podcast last Week, you can hear the excerpt on the five stages of Dharma discovery. So if you have not tuned into it, be sure to tune into it after this episode. Please let me know on Instagram. What stage are you on? I'm hearing back that a lot of you guys are on stage four. Some of you are in stage three. So would love to hear where you guys are at. And for this week, I wanted to read another excerpt. This is chapter eight, called Taking Action Requires Courage. And I wrote this chapter because when I was writing this whole book, I kept on just thinking about, okay, what were my. My mental blocks? What were my constant thoughts? What did I keep coming up against in my own journey of discovering my Dharma? This was like, the hardest thing for me because I explained more in the book. But my family was very, very against what I was doing. I'm the first woman to even work in my family, let, you know, move to Bali in India, and do what I'm doing now. So there was a lot of fear and there was a lot of reprogramming that I had to do. And really what it came down to is this point of taking action. And I was someone that wanted to know, okay, well, what do I need to do? And once I know what I need to do, then I'll take action. And I've realized that that's not how the world works. It's not that you know everything you're going to do and then you take action. It's you dive into the action and then the road will begin to reveal itself. You know, like, I'm not going to figure out how to get to the other side of the highway until I begin driving it. And all I'm going to be able to see is how far my lights are. Maybe it's six feet ahead, and that's all I know. But I can keep trusting that and keep moving forward. I'm never going to see the end of the highway to begin driving. So this chapter is really all about that taking action and the courage. Because you really can't have a spiritual conversation or a conversation about Dharma without the actual gritty, get shit done. You gotta do it, and it's fucking scary, and it's gonna be the last thing you wanna do. And I wish that it was, like, smooth and easy all the time, but it's not. And I think that we, you know, try to sell this quick fix, or you're just gonna manifest your way to purpose. And that's just. It's just not how it works. Like, it takes you moving through the fear, it takes you taking consistent action, it takes you manifesting it into 3D form. Because in this 3D world that we live in, we need to share and experience it. And that's how we're going to get feedback from the world and see what's working and what's not and pivot along the way and move forward. So this chapter is really about that. When I was writing the book, I was constantly polling you guys on my Instagram stories of what are your biggest blocks, what are your biggest challenges? And I actually pulled hundreds of you guys. And in this chapter, I actually go down the top four fears that people come across, the obstacles that are keeping them from their Dharma. Those are, number one, confusion. That was definitely mine as well. Number two, not enoughness. Number three, not knowing where to start. And number four, not enough time. So I actually go through every single one, which I don't know if I'll have time to go read all of that in this episode, but you'll get your hands on the book and you'll be able to read it all. But I actually go through every single fear and give you how to overcome it and how it's not even truly there. So let's get started with this chapter. You've always been ready for your Dharma. You were literally born for it, and at the same time, you're never going to totally be ready for it. Don't you love a good duality? Ah, the joys of being human. The part of you who has always been ready wants to just freaking do it. You feel like you've been waiting your entire life for this moment. It feels so close that you can just reach out and grab it. But the part of you that is never ready is like, that looks like a lot of hard work, responsibility, and time, and I just don't have that right now. That part of you is entrenched in the everyday tasks, hurdles, and responsibilities that plague you. It's not totally wrong, but it's not totally right either. Both sides are important and balance each other out. You'll never be 100% ready. So the important thing is to learn when you're ready enough. You learn through the fear. If you feel like you're totally ready for everything you are doing, you aren't pushing yourself enough. Everyone is nervous, but the secret of successful people is that they do it anyway. Your quest to discover your Dharma prepares you for embodying it. The more you stall around being ready, the more resistance you create. The only way to become ready is to choose that you Are we cannot embody our Dharmas if we do not trust our dharmas. Honestly, most of us still hold onto an idea of what our Dharma is supposed to look like. When Dharma comes knocking on our door, we just don't listen. It comes in the form of opportunities showing up without you even really trying. It comes in people being amazed by things you think aren't anything extra. Life has a plan for us way bigger than our conscious mind can even begin to fathom. If we can just learn to follow the intuitive guidance that comes to us from source, then we don't have to question anymore. It becomes really freaking obvious. What is that thing people keep asking you for help with? What is the advice you keep giving to people? What seems to come really naturally to you that other people struggle with? What can you do with your metaphorical eyes closed? That takes a lot of practice. For others, that's your Dharma. Obstacles keeping you from your Dharma. The universe throws you obstacles when it's calling you to rise. I polled my audience to learn about the biggest obstacles keeping them from discovering and embodying their Dharma. When I read through their answers, I felt like I was talking to one person. The same person I was when I was searching for my Dharma. They all had the same doubts, fears, hesitations, worries and patterns. I want to share them with you to show you that you aren't alone. That those negative beliefs you have aren't unique to you. And so they're not a part of you. They are borrowed from outside sources. It's time to let that old paradigm end. These fears are fear of not being good enough, second guessing yourself. Time management, familial conditioning your family or partner doesn't understand, societal pressures. Worrying about what other people will think. Lack of courage, unable to connect to intuition. Losing yourself, doing what you thought you should. Choosing fear over love. All the old mantras you've subconsciously given yourself when you were at your lowest. Deprogramming and reprogramming your beliefs. Fear based thinking. Lack mentality. Not enough money, market is too saturated. Overwhelm, not knowing where to begin, Too many ideas, anxiety, jealousy, feeling weird distractions and impatience. So now that we know those fears are there, let's talk about them. I'm going to dive into the four obstacles people face when discovering their Dharma and show you how you can overcome them. 1. Confusion. The number one reason people aren't living their Dharma is that they believe they're confused. More than ever, we're exposed to different timelines. Someone is living their best life as a travel blogger in Bali, another as a mom with the cutest four year old and another as an entrepreneur with two seven figure businesses. They all sound great and look pretty epic on social media, so we have no idea what we're meant to do ourselves. Back in the day, there weren't that many options available to us. As a woman, you either became a stay at home mom or a nurse or a teacher. As a man, you could follow in your pop's footsteps or go under your neighbor's wing. Now there are millions of possibilities with millions more being created every single day. People are tantric life coaches and holistic interior designers and so many other things. It can be pretty confusing to figure out what you want to do and what if you choose wrong. The thing is, there's really no such thing as confusion. Often we feel confused because we haven't fully grasped what our intuition is telling us. There is one truth, and that truth is eternal. Confusion is just the blurriness that happens when you aren't listening to it. The answers are already inside of you. Your fears just aren't letting you hear them. We act like confusion is a bad thing when really it's actually a great thing. What we experience as confusion is really a process of evaluating our own truth. Let me repeat that again. What we experience as confusion is really a process of evaluating our own truth. Confusion is a higher vibration than apathy. It's a sign you're on the path of discovering your dharma. You can't gain clarity without first going through confusion. We often push away uncertainty, feeling guilty for not knowing exactly what we are doing when those are actually the most pivotal moments of our lives. Confusion is necessary before clarity because it's in that process you find your truth. Ride the waves of uncertainty. They're the only path to clear waters. If you feel confused by all the contradicting advice you receive, I'm going to give you the exact prescription you need. It's not the one that you want, but it's the one that's going to change everything. Go on an advice detox for one month. I want you to not ask anyone for advice on anything. Not your mom, your bestie, your spouse, and especially not the Internet. Okay? Not the Internet. No forums, no Reddit. This is going to be most effective when you feel the most confused, because that's when you are reevaluating your truth and need your clearest thinking without it being affected by the thoughts, fears and experiences of others. Sure, there are times when advice is beneficial. It's when you don't know the difference between your opinions and the opinions of others that you need to stop. Because that's when you're saying someone else knows what's best for me better than I do. Asking others for advice without listening to yourself is giving up your power to someone who isn't you. If you constantly call someone else to ask for advice on every move in your life, I suggest you reclaim your power and ask your highest self for the answers instead. This is not to say you should never ask anybody's advice ever again. Allow in advice when you are anchored enough in your own truth to not let it change the trajectory of your life. Take every piece of advice with a grain of pink Himalayan sea salt and check in with your internal compass first. You know those people who instantly shoot down your ideas and come up with a list of reasons why they won't work. Don't share your ideas with them, especially when you're still in the vata stage of figuring out your dharma. The vata is the air idea stage. I go through it a lot in this book. Because your dharma still hasn't been set in stone, one of these conversations may prevent you from ever bringing it to life. Their intentions, insecurities, or fears aren't yours to take. Treat your dharma like a precious newborn and only show it to those who can hold space for it. Some people may be so triggered by you following your dharma that they can't help but try to knock you down. You may not even be able to share your dharma with some of the people closest to you. It can feel hard to withhold such a tremendous aspect of your life. But if you leave every conversation with them feeling defeated, learn that lesson. Once you found the strength to do it and it's already in motion, then you can share it if you so desire. But while it's still in that precious newborn phase, you need to keep it safe. When you do feel like you are at a place when your inner GPS is strong and even a hater can't knock you down, you are ready to open yourself up to advice. But be selective about who you seek advice from. Seek advice from someone who has done something similar to what you envision. If you want to be a writer, sign up for a writer's workshop. If you are thinking about life coaching, talk to some life coaches. It can be more challenging to ask someone for advice who's actually doing the thing. They're probably busy. You don't know them. You feel awkward reaching out. However, only they can give you an answer because they've gone through the process and can shed light on the areas you may not even be looking at. Even they don't have all the answers, as two dharmas are never the same. Treat advice like a buffet. Take what resonates with you and leave the rest on the table. Some people may keep trying to give you advice even when you aren't asking for it. Like your parents, they believe that this is the way you show love. Often their entire relationship dynamic has been based on the parent advisor, child advisee dynamic, and they feel jolly. This is a boundary you're going to have to set both internally and externally. I suggest telling that parent you're going on an advice detox, and as much as you appreciate how much they care, you're working on listening to yourself more clearly. You'll let them know when the doors are open for advice. Again, they may not take this well, but it's important you speak this truth and mark this boundary. Clearly let them know that the best way they can show their love is to allow you to navigate this time in your life on your own. Another reason people feel confused is because they haven't tried it yet. I've had students ask me, am I supposed to figure out my dharma by trying a million things and seeing what sticks? That sounds like it'll take forever. That fear of taking too long keeps them from taking action at all. The truth is, yes, you're going to have to try a couple of things before you figure it out. No one gets it on the first try, and even if they do, it's probably going to evolve. But that's the fun part. You get to experience life in so many different ways and see what fits for you. More than ever, we're embodying many different careers in a short amount of time because it's never too late. Lifespans are longer than ever before, so even if you're starting a new career at 50, you still got a good number of years ahead of you. It's not game over. It's just the halftime. As any sports fan knows, halftimes are a chance to reevaluate, reassess and fine tune the strategy for the next half. We've always known about the midlife crisis, but now so many of us are experiencing the quarter life crisis, which is actually an awakening. We've realized far earlier in our lives that we don't need to keep up with the Joneses in order to be happy. They're all depressed. We aren't willing to sacrifice our lives for a paycheck. That doesn't make us selfish. It makes us self aware. Often we say we're confused when we're really afraid of what people will think. If the reason you aren't discovering your dharma begins with the words I don't want them to think, then you aren't being true to yourself. Some people are going to label you crazy. That's a sign that you are breaking the norms and doing something right. If you aren't startling people at least a little bit, then you're playing by the old rules, which is not your dharma. You were meant to create something that has never existed before and that's going to require you to be okay with not being liked by everyone. If you're confused, you're on track. That means you're asking the right questions. Most people never even get to the point of being confused because they accept their circumstances and never shoot for more. I hope you liked that excerpt. Now there's still not enoughness not knowing where to start. Our words are our wants. So many more sections just in this one chapter. So if you want to read the rest, get access to it. Head over to I am SaharaRose.com Dharma that link is over in the show notes Pre order the book and I have some epic pre order bonuses for you which are only available if you pre order the book before it comes out January 5th. If you're listening to this after, you can just head over to wherever you purchase your books and get the book. But if you're listening to this before, if you pre order one copy, you will get a ticket to my live virtual book launch event where I'll be answering your questions about finding your purpose. My Discover your Dharma meditation exclusive end of chap practices to dive deeper into the content and giveaways including a one on one dharma coaching session with me via Zoom that will be a giveaway for one person selected randomly who pre orders doshas and Dharma shirts and rose gold goddesses memberships. We're giving those away. Super excited. If you order four copies you will get content to create your own discovery your Dharma book club. So you will get reflective questions and journal prompts to ask yourself and your group at the end of each chapter to dive deeper into it. And you'll also get the replay of my Discover your Dharma meditation workshop in New York last year plus everything else in pre ordering one book. If you pre order 10 copies you get everything else plus all of the content to teach your students or team how to align with their dharma. So if you are like a yoga teacher, meditation teacher, if you work in hr, corporate sphere, whatever it is and you want your team, your students to know their Dharmas because it really is so important as a team for you guys to feel interconnected. Then we will have these specific questions for you. So I will create a video on aligning your Dharma with your company or team's vision, how to live with purpose each day, and also reflective questions that you can ask at the end of each chapter to dive deeper into it it in a group setting and the replay of my Discover your Dharma meditation workshop in New York. So all of those things are available for you. Head over to iamsahara rose.com dharma pre order the book, submit your receipt there and if you've already pre ordered it, you can still submit your receipt there. I also have my new Dharma Archetype quiz that is available for you. You will learn which is your Dharma archetype. It breaks it down into your top two. So that is also available for you after you pre order the book@iamsaharrose.com dharma or @dharma Archetyp. Both links are in the show Notes I'm so excited to share this book with you. It has been my deepest life's work and I can't wait to see how it resonates with you all. Sending you so much love and if you loved this episode I would love to send you a free gift which is the first half of my unreleased book Eat Right for your mind body type. This is a different book than Eat Feel Fresh, my first book ever which is not released anywhere and I am gifting it exclusively to those who leave a review of my podcast in the itunes store. So all you got to do is head over to itunes where you may be listening to this podcast and leave a review, take a screenshot that you've left it and email it over to me@saharaatfeelfresh.com Again, that's Sahara S A H A R aattfeelfresh.com and I will send you back the first half of my unreleased book Eat Right for your mind body type which goes all into Ayurveda, doshas, plant based nutrition, body types, all of the things in a really fun and engaging way. So this is my gift to you for free for supporting the podcast. Every single review I personally read. It really helps the podcast be listened to by more people so we can raise the vibration of the planet together and I am so grateful to have you on this journey. Thank you so much for listening and I'll see you on the next episode. Namaste Sa.