427: How This Mom Found Her Purpose as a Dharma Coach After Helping Her Children Overcome Addiction + Depression with Rebekah May

Namaste, it's Sahara Rose. And welcome back to the Highest Self podcast, a place where we discuss what makes you your soul's highest development. I have interviewed so many incredible people on this podcast, from Sudguru to Gabby Bernstein to Deepak Chopra to Don Miguel Ruiz and so many others. But really, the episodes that most hit home with me are people who are living normal lives, who maybe don't even know what their true purpose is. And then suddenly, something shifts, and it's stories like this that inspire us to remember that transformation is possible at any given moment as soon as you choose to say yes to yourself. And what makes this episode especially special is because the queen you're about to listen to, her life radically transformed through finding this podcast. So she shares with us. While going through a difficult divorce at the end of 2019, Rebecca found this podcast and a few months later dove into my book, discover your Dharma, and then heard about Dharma Coaching Institute, which is my school, to become a certified Dharma sole purpose and spiritual life coach, and instantly knew that this was the next step on her pathway. She had given the past several decades of her life to care for her children. Her son battling a heroin addiction, her daughter battling depression. And for the first time, she found herself wondering, well, what is my purpose? What are my gifts? What is my life about? Because she had been so giving to everyone around her. So for her own healing, she signed up for Dharma Coaching Institute. And what happens next is nothing short of magic. So I'm beyond excited to share this episode with you because she is a listener just like you, and she is just such a beautiful example of what is possible when we hear of something that resonates for us and we're interested in diving deeper. But what happens is, most of us, we just hear about that thing. We're like, oh, that would be nice. And if I had the time, that'd be cool. If I had the money. And we have all these excuses as to why it can't be now. And she just so embodies what it is like to even though you don't have all the money in the bank, even though you don't have anything figured out, in fact, you might even be going through some of the most painful experiences of your life right now and simultaneously be choosing to evolve, be choosing to put yourself first, be choosing to dive deeper into your soul's purpose. So I was so touched when I heard Rebecca's story and witnessing her in Dharma Coaching Institute over this past year, and I wanted to have her on the podcast to share some of her story with you, and I know you're gonna feel her energy through it. And doors are open right now for Dharma Coaching Institute. So if you've been maybe dancing around the idea, maybe you've been on the website before or you've heard about it here, maybe it's been not the right time, not the right money, but you also know that it is part of your soul's evolution. Then I hope this podcast episode inspires you to take action. While doors are open right now, and class actually starts April 4th week, so head over to dharmacoachinginstitute.com if you're interested in learning more, checking out our curriculum and seeing what's inside. Again, that's dharma.dharma coaching institute.com and you can find that link in the show notes. So, without further ado, let's welcome Rebecca May to the Highest Self Podcast.

Welcome Rebecca, to the Highest Self Podcast. It's so great to have you here, Sahara.

Thank you so much. This is an absolute honor.

And the first question I'd love to ask you is, what makes you your highest self?

Oh, this is a good question. I have been preparing myself for this and asking myself the same question. What makes me my highest self? And it's this right here. Living my Dharma absolutely makes me my highest self. Because when I'm living my highest self, I can share that with the people that I'm talking to, and they're like, what are you taking? What are you on? Like, what are you doing? And they want to know. So talking to people, just being in that moment, in that 3D moment, actually. Yeah, that makes me my highest self. And I communicate with people in that level, and they see this fire in me, and that's. That makes me my highest self.

I love that. Yeah. Just our everyday, ordinary interactions and showing people in that, like, smiling at the person that you're talking to or sharing with them, even if you feel like they might not be into spirituality, like what you're working through, and you just don't know the light bulbs that may switch on.

Right? Absolutely.

So you have such an inspiring story of transformation that has really touched my heart and the hearts of the Dharma Coaching Institute students. So I would love for you to share where you were at before Dharma Coaching Institute. What made you decide to join, and then just this incredible transformation that you've had over the past year.

Man, it's kind of crazy how I ended up here. Just a little bit of background. I came from a family with an alcoholic father and a mother who kind of didn't know what to do with all these three kids running around. And it was kind of a tough childhood. My dad was in the military, so we went overseas, and I did get to enjoy my childhood that way. But having an alcoholic father, you kind of grow up differently than other people do. I grew up in a household with a lot of screaming, a lot of yelling, and I thought that this is how all households are. And so growing up, I did my thing. I got pregnant really young. I became a mom at the age of 17, got pregnant at 16, had my daughter at 20. So I was a really young mom. But I always felt that that was my purpose, to be a mom and to be a young mom. I always felt that. And I did the best that I could, but I raised my children the same way my parents raised me, because I thought that that's how I was supposed to do it. I didn't have any good role models in my life. I didn't have anybody to tell me how to do things. The few changes that I did make with my kids was that I told them that I loved them, like, over excessively, probably more than I ever should have. No, that's not true. More than they got. Yeah. I love my kids, and so I did a few things differently. But when my son was. My oldest son, he's 30, when he was growing up, he wanted to be a doctor. And that's what he. From the time he was little, he talks about being a doctor. So I pushed him through school, and I motivated him, because that wasn't talked about in my family, like, going to college and having a career. Like, I didn't think about those kinds of things. And so when my son was in middle school, he came home all excited, and he's like, mom, I'm going to get the Bill Gates Millennial Scholarship. And I was like, okay, let's do it. And that's a scholarship that pays for your way to any university in the United States. Harvard, Yale, full ride all the way to his PhD. So I encouraged him and did everything that I should do to help motivate him. And he got that scholarship his senior year of high school. He was 1,1000 students a year that get that scholarship. So there I am, preparing him to go off to college. He picked Baylor University to go to Baylor, and we did the whole college thing and all that kind of stuff. And his first semester of college, he got involved with the wrong kids. He started doing drugs, became addicted to cocaine and whatever else that they were doing. And with the scholarship, you know, I was so focused on him keeping it. Like, I became obsessed with him keeping the scholarship to the point where, yeah, I was obsessed with him keeping the scholarship, not thinking about, I need to protect him. It was just this prized possession that we got because I would have never been able to afford to give him something like that. And I didn't want him to lose it. But he did something really, really stupid at school while he was intoxicated, and he did get suspended. He lost a scholarship. And I just went into a tailspin. I didn't know what to do with myself. This was 2012, and somebody gifted me the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. And that's kind of where my journey began. I became obsessed with this book, reading it like it was my Bible. And I started to realize that I am more than just this body. And I started to come into myself, and I started to realize that I was waking up. And it was really profound for me because that's what kept me going through my son's drug addiction, because he became addicted to heroin. I didn't know what I was going to do. As a parent, that's one of your worst fears, is that your child's going to become addicted to a drug that, you know could kill him or there's no return from that. And so for, like, five years, it was jail and drugs and rehab and all this kind of stuff while I was still trying to hold on to myself and figure myself out while taking care of a family. I was married. I had another child. I had a daughter. And so it was overwhelming. And I still didn't know what spirituality was. I still didn't understand what was happening inside of me. But I felt at peace. Even through all the chaos. I felt like, this is going to be okay. And, like, right before he finally did stop using drugs, God spoke to me. And God was like, your son is not going to die from heroin. From that moment on, I let go. I surrendered. I was like, I completely let it go. Yeah. Anyways, fast forward to today, and he's sober and he's in school. He's going for his PhD. He's going to help change the water systems in third world countries. Yeah. So I'm so blessed. And my daughter helped me through this whole thing with her encouragement. She's autistic, and I didn't know how to be a parent to someone who is autistic. I just tried to learn how to be a parent to someone who was a drug addict. Now I got to figure out how to be A parent to someone has autism. So I just felt like a washing machine, you know, I was just being tossed and turned all over the place. And my marriage just. It was not what it should be. And it's so funny, because one of your podcasts, I was struggling with what happened. My marriage ended in 2019, right before the. Literally, December. My marriage ended. The pandemic hit in January. So I was like, what the heck? In one of your podcasts, you were telling the story about a situation that had happened, and that's when it sparked in me that I am doing the right thing. I found your podcast because I didn't have a purpose anymore. I'd gotten divorced. My son was doing great, my daughter was doing okay, and I needed to find myself. So I, like, got on Spotify, and I was like, spiritual podcast. And, like, a whole bunch of them showed up, and then yours showed up, and I started listening, and I was just blown away with the profound moments that really just spoke directly to me. And it just felt so good to have that reassurance that I'm on the right path and that I'm okay, and all the bullshit that I went through is okay, and everything happens for a reason, and I'm here for a reason, and all of that just. It just kind of just unfolded from there. So I started listening to your podcast, every single one of them. I started to just find myself, my spirituality, and listening to different podcasts. Actually, I think it was I heard you on another podcast is what it was. And I was like, who is she? And then I thought, there, and kind of just bounced around a different podcast and kind of just stuck with yours because it goes so deep into everything. Every topic that you cover, something resonates with me. And I was like, if something's resonating with me, how many other people is this resonating with? Right? So I kept listening to your podcast, and the biggest thing for me is I didn't have a purpose. I kept asking, even before your podcast, I was like, what's. Every day, I would drive to work, what's my purpose? And I wouldn't get my answer. And then one day you're like, do you need to find out your purpose in life? And I was just like, yes, I do, Tahara. Tell me what my purpose is. Tell me how to find it. And from that episode when you started talking about purpose, that is just where everything just kind of transpired from that moment. And then the next thing I know, you are offering the first class of DCI Dharma Coaching Institute. It was just like. Something hit me on the head. It was like, you need to sign up for this. And I was like, I can't afford that right now. I was like, no, you need to sign up for this right now. And that's what I did. I hit that button. I hit the submit button, and I was a wreck. I didn't have a purpose. I didn't have. I didn't have anything except for my computer. That's kind of like how what led me right here where I am today. And it's been such an incredible journey so far. Yeah.

Thank you so much for sharing that beautiful story. And you are just such an example of resilience and strength and also surrender all of it together. So thank you for being courageous enough to share that vulnerable story. And you shared with me that even when you signed up for dci, you were like, well, I don't know if I could ever coach anyone. You know, I'm just doing this to learn about my own purpose. So how has you were in the first round of DCI and are now going through it again and have just majorly blossomed? So how has now being in the experience shifted you and your idea of your purpose?

Oh, man, my confidence. My confidence is, like, through the roof. Like, I remember being on dci, like, that first week when we were introducing ourselves, and I was just, like, hysterically crying through, like, the entire thing. And like, every time after that for that whole, like, it wasn't until, like, the end that I started feeling a little more confident in myself and feeling like, hey, I can do this. And I think it was because you brought me on and you told me to share my story. And when I signed up for DCI and I never wanted to be a coach that coached women through the struggles that I've been through, I wanted to stay as far away from that memory as possible because it hurts to go back there. It hurts to think about those situations again. It wasn't even until this year that when my story actually started to make me feel good and I knew I came into myself when I can tell my story without crying, without coming from that victim mindset. Right. Coming right into just expansion and sharing my story with other women or men that are feeling like that right now, the way I felt, that I didn't have a purpose. And being 46 years old, I thought I was too late to the game. And then you reminded me, you're like, no. And all the other people that are in our group together, you remind us constantly. It's never too Late. And that's what kept me going and being here. Yeah.

And such a testament to. Sometimes our stories, they feel so personal to us that we're like, can I just not talk about that horrible thing that I've gone through? Can I stay as far away from it as possible? But that story is your unique obstacle that you've overcome, that you are here to help other people overcome. And it's to find enough healing in it that you can, you know, go back to those places from a higher space of understanding them and being able to transmute them. And I'm sure you would have never guessed that. December 2019, when you're like, what's this podcast? Let me just tune in that here you would be one day on the podcast sharing your story.

Never, never, never thought of that. I think I manifested that, to be honest with you, because I think at the beginning I was like, I'm going to be on her podcast. Everything that's happening for me right now is a manifestation of what I want and what I desire. And it's happening because of dci, because of the work that I put into it. And there is no better place to be because I had lots of opportunities to take coaching. You know, I own a small business in my town. I've been a business owner for about nine years now in my town. A brick and mortar store. And that taught me some valuable lessons. And people are always telling me, oh, you should be a coach. You should be a life coach. And I was like, I'm just a bartender in my store, not an actual bartender, but people come into my shop and they want to tell me their life stories. And so I could have looked into that. But when I found dci, that resonated with me. It came from like, my soul was like telling me and I could see my future self. Yes, this is what you need to do because this is where we are right now. If you want to get here, you need to do this. And so that's. Yeah, dci, it's been an amazing journey.

I love that. I feel like the type of person it attracts is a certain breed. We all feel each other on such a deep level and we're in these calls of we want to share our stories and we're heart centered and also bring in the spirituality and the higher perspective and just a whole range of modalities. So I'm so glad that you said yes to that soul calling. So if there is someone out there who's listening to this, who maybe feels like I'm a mom I don't have time for this. I've poured everything I have into my children or it's too late for me. You know, I don't have the same energy I used to have when I was younger.

What advice do you have for them?

Just do it. It's a gift to yourself. If this is. If you do not know what your purpose is, if you ask yourself like I did, what is my purpose? What am I going to do with the rest of my life? My kids are already. I'm an empty nester. My kids are pretty much grown. I don't like the job I'm doing. I don't like the business I'm running. I don't like the pat them on. And you hear this podcast and this is something that sparks joy in you. Take that leap. Because if you don't take that leap, you're not going to discover your dharma. If you sit back and wait for it to land in your lap, it's not going to happen. Things accidentally happen to find our dharma. I'm a leaper. I take the leap. And so I say just to do it because it will be the greatest gift that you can give yourself. I did not sign up for DCI thinking I am going to be a coach. That is not what it was at all. I will be honest. I could never have afforded you. Never. I could never have taken the weekly, the month that it would have taken to get me where I am right now through my healing. I was looking for healing after my divorce. I was looking. I was exhausted, Sahar. I was exhausted from going through 30 years of raising children and the struggle. It was like real. And I needed something for myself. I needed to find myself and anybody listening to this. If you have any doubts in your mind, just don't just jump and take that leap because it will be the greatest gift you can give yourself. I never thought I was going to end up wanting to be a coach after this. I thought, you know what? I am going to do this, do some healing, do some soul work, do some self love stuff. Push the button, ok. And then bam. My whole world changed. I am coaching people. I have clients. I am working with the school system to empower kids through the Dharma program that I am helping to build with someone else. Every door just keeps opening up. Every door just keeps opening up. And I am so grateful.

Thank you so much for sharing that and bringing just your love and your vibrance to so many people who are right now deeply needing that.

And tell us a little bit about.

Yeah. What what does the future have in store for you now? What are you dreaming about next?

Well, one of my biggest dreams is to, no pressure, work at dci. That's been a goal of mine for, like, do you need me to file, do paperwork? Intern. That's at about midway through dci, I was like, you know what? I'm going to work with Sahara Rose. I manifest that. I put it out into the universe, and I started coaching clients, and I found this wonderful lady named Veronica who is starting a program called Empowerment Kids in the school system. And I am a firm believer that if you want something done, you have to start with the children. But then Veronica got me thinking. She is like, yes, but the children, they are going to try to inspire their parents with what they are learning. And the parents are going to be in this mindset that is different from their children. So we need to work with the parents, too. And I was like, I got that. I can work with the moms. We can work with the kids. We can work with all of them. And so last Thursday was my first day at the school. I had this amazing little girl. She just was so amazing. Oh, my goodness. It was just a joy to be in her presence and to talk to her about empathy and about Dharma and the words that she's never even heard before. And she heard these words, and she was so inquisitive, like, what does that mean? Tell me more. And she didn't even want the hour to end. And so that brought me the most amount of joy that I have ever felt in a long, long, long time. To work with her and see that light go off in her, it was just so. Yeah, I think that is where my journey is right now, is to work with children and to work with the school system to continue just growing and expanding. I don't know if I am a one on one coach. I feel like, I don't know, I like to rile people up and get their energy on fire, and I like to make people see the bigger picture and just inspire them. That's what brings me joy. That makes me my highest self also. So I don't know, I'm just enjoying the ride. And I have no expectations, none at all.

Thank you so much for sharing that. And it just shows the versatility that this work is needed in from our school system, our children, the parents speaking on stages, group coaching, one on one coaching. You know, we're really needed in every single corner, and every single person is going to have their own interests because that's where it's guiding them. That's where their energy is meant to serve. So I trust that you'll keep following that sacred flame within you, and it will take you exactly where you need to go. And just like the listeners, too, if they're feeling that flame within them and they feel like DCI is the next step, they're ready for stepping into a portal of transformation. I feel like one of the best parts of DCI is just being part of the community and seeing other people's just life changes and these people moving countries or quitting their jobs and all of these incredible things. It's just such a reminder of what is possible. So thank you for being that, Rebecca, for so many people.

You're welcome. I didn't even mention the community. Oh, my gosh. I have made friends, friendships that will last a lifetime because of dci. I don't know how many other coaching programs can say that. I hear people or see people on social media all the time talking about the program that they took or now they have to take this program or something because that one wasn't what they wanted. And I'm like, we have a family like Fran and Stacy and all the other coaches and Stephanie, and it is a family. Like, it is inspiring to have something to look forward to every Wednesday, every Thursday, to meet with my tribe. The in between the Facebook community that we've created. We are so supportive of each other. If anybody wants anything, I can just put a message in there and be like, I need this, guys. Help me. And they're there for me. It's been so amazing. And so during this pandemic, things have been really hard. And to have this community, like, I don't want it to end. I don't want it to end. Like, I'm like, no, may, stay away.

Well, who knows? Maybe you'll be working for us soon and leading your own coaching pods there.

At D.C. oh, my gosh, Sahara, that's. Like I said, it is just something that I feel in my soul. I really, truly do. And it has just been an honor to be part of this whole thing. Like, it is transformational. And I think anybody listening right now, if they want transformation in their life, please, please, please take this opportunity and just sign up, because it literally changed my life. Literally. You're changing people's lives, Sahara.

I'm just reminding you it's already in you because it's just been waiting to be activated. So thank you again for sharing your story and for being vulnerable and for leading with the heart. We so appreciate it.

I Appreciate you and all that you've done, what you've created. You should really be proud of yourself, Sahara. Like, really be proud of yourself, honestly, coming from a mom. Like, be super proud of yourself. And I love hearing your family stories and what you've done with your family. What a transformation there with your mom and your dad and your brother, and it's just incredible. And your husband. I mean, I just love it. I love all of it. It's just amazing how you transform people's lives. And that's what I want to do. I want to transform people's lives, but not on the one. On one level. I want to reach hundreds of people at a time. You know, I want to talk to 100 people and inspire them to just love themselves and that there is something more out there than just the 9 to 5 and making dinner and going to bed and raising the kids. There's so much more to life.

Well, maybe a podcast is next for you.

Oh, my gosh, don't even say that.

We have the podcast module coming up.

Yes, we do. One of my favorites. Yeah. Along with all the other modules. The Dharma Blueprint, my absolute favorite, the Dharma Spiral. That keeps you in alignment with yourself, that helps you keep in check. The doshas. Those are my favorite. I love the doshas and the archetypes. And I am a teacher and a visionary, but last time, I wasn't. This time, I'm a teacher and a visionary, because when I took the quiz the first time, the Dharma Archetype Quiz, which you can find on Sahara's website. Go and take that quiz to find out a little bit more about yourself. Because after I took. When I took the quiz the first time, it gave me a whole other list. It was like entertainer and warrior. And because I was still coming from a mindset of being a victim, I was still hurt and I was still wounded. So taking that quiz every couple of years, it really helped keep you in alignment with yourself, because, like you said, we flow. We ebb, and we flow through the chakra system and the Dharma system and all of it, you know, And I just. It's just so wonderful.

I love that. Well, I think also public speaking for you with the teacher visionary is coming next. And it's just so amazing how we have such a range of all of the archetypes of Dharma coaches from people who are like, I want to be the researcher one and, like, go into research of where people have meaning or some that want to do entertainment, some that want to be the warrior, some, you know, nurturers and it's just that beautiful diversity of the way that this work can, can reach so many.

And how, when you understand what your archetypes are and what your dosha is, even though they can change depending on what you're going through in your life, to have that as a blueprint to guide you and to help you, it's kind of like having your own personal, like, cheerleader by your side to be like, hey, go over here. This is where you need to be focusing on right now because da da, da, da da. And so it is so reassuring to have that in life. And I love it and I can't imagine my life without it. And so if you are wondering what your life could be like with all of these things with dci, don't hesitate. Just do it, because it is so worth it.

Yay.

Well, thank you so much again for sharing your beautiful heart with us today.

Oh, Sahara, it was my pleasure and an honor and I am very humbled to have this experience. And yeah, thank you so much.

Oh, my God, I so feel her love and her heart and her joy and her empathy. And truly, when you're speaking with someone who's living their bliss, that feeling is contagious. So if you are ready for your transformational story, if you are feeling that DCI is the next step on your own healing and spiritual journey, or maybe you're ready to fully step into a new career for yourself as a certified Soul purpose coach. And doors are open right now. They won't be open again until the fall. So head over to dharmacoachinginstitute.com to sign up and start when class starts April 4th week. We're so excited to invite in our Spring of 2022 class. We have so many incredible things planned, including a live DCI event that we are planning right now. So again, head over to dharmacoachinginstitute.com to get dibs on this magic and I can't wait to see you inside. Thank you so much for tuning in and I'll see you on the next one.

J.