501: How To Become A Conscious Creator on Social Media + Handle Haters with Amanda Bucci

At the beginning, people were like, you're an Ayurveda author. Like, why are you sharing yourself, twerking? Like, this is inappropriate. And who are you? And all of those things. Because I wasn't sure about myself. And as I gained that grounding of actually shaking, your ass is fucking sacred. And you're healing generational trauma, and you're releasing, you know, like, and the science of shaking, and it's fun, and you get to have joy and you get to be in your sensuality, which I feel like now is more culturally accepted. But it wasn't so much.

And you were a pioneer of that, by the way.

Spiritual dark pioneer, I will say. But now I never get haters from it because it's like, you're just not going to follow me if this triggers you. And it's not like a, am I safe? Am I not? It's like, bitch, this is who I am. You're either going to like this or not. And then I feel like that I don't need to learn that lesson anymore. Welcome back to the Highest Self podcast. My name is Sahara Rose, and on this podcast, we love to take spirituality and make it modern, fun, grounded, relatable, and actually practical to our lives today. Because the truth is, spirituality needs to evolve with this day and age. We are out here on our phones, on social media, posting thirst traps. It's affecting our consciousness. Okay? Social media is making a huge ripple effect on how we think, how we perceive the world, relationships, friendships, we work. I mean, the list goes on. It's kind of impossible to speak about spirituality or anything without taking into account our relationship with social media. Because, I mean, I did that thing that you track how many hours a day you spend on your phone, and I spent like, this is before. This is the old me, but the old me was spending, like seven hours a fucking day on my phone. And I was like, how? But I was like, you know what? I'm working. I'm working all the time. But that's crazy. Seven hours of just being on my phone, not including how much time I spent on my laptop. And that really made me start thinking about my relationship to social media. But some of you guys don't know this, but I have been a content creator my entire career. I started blogging when I was 19 years old, so I don't really know life without sharing myself online. It's such a huge part of who I am and what I do. And I honestly believe even if I could choose any career, I would still choose exactly what I'm doing today. And it has its detriments and its side effects, and it really does impact our neurobiology and the way that we interact with each other. So one of my dear friends who I've known for like, five, six years now, she's such a sister to me, and she is not only a content creator, but she's a very deeply evolved and just like, nuanced person who looks at things from all perspectives. And over the years, we've had many conversations on social media. I remember it was like, I want to say back in 2018, 2019, and she was about to write this book. She'll tell us a little bit later. And we were just talking about how social media could also be this, like, beautiful gateway into our consciousness. And we often speak about the negative, the pitfalls of social media, which are very real, but also it allows us to share information and ideation and things in this really rapid way. Whereas, you know, writing a book, it takes at least one to two years just to write the book, then a year until the book gets out. And by then the world has changed so much, the world is constantly changing, that what I love about social media is you can get things out into the ethers before having to wait, before having to get it edited and approved, which, like, waters things down over time. And then by the time it's out, it's like, imagine I wrote something in 2018 or 2019 before the pandemic happened. I mean, it's. We're all in a totally different world now. So that's what I love about social media. It's really raw, it's unfiltered, it's for the people. And we're gonna speak about kind of the pros and cons and how to have our own relationship with it and to make the best of it on this episode. So without further ado, let's welcome coach social media expert and author of the new book followed, Amanda Bucci.

Thank you so much for having me. So excited to be here.

Likewise. So the first question I'd love to ask you is what makes you your highest self?

What makes me my highest self is always listening to that path and those inner nudges that you get that might seem off or they might seem illogical or they might seem confusing to your current situation, but really following the path of, like, self actualization and happiness and joy, regardless of what people are saying about you or what other expectations people have of you or what expectations you even put on yourself, and. And that path is going to be just like Your book, the path to your dharma, the path to you really feeling into and creating the reality in the world that allows you to make the greatest impact possible.

Absolutely. And one of the most powerful ways of finding self actualization in both of our paths has been plant medicine. I just shared with you. I recently sat in my first ceremony with Grandmother Ayahuasca, like 10 days ago, not even that long ago, which is crazy. I'm like, I'm still in it. And one of the huge things that came up for me was my relationship with social media, which I'm so excited. It's like we're having this conversation today because it just showed me just like how interconnected my energy was with my social media and how kind of blurry the lines have been between my personal and my public and business life. And like, the beauty of that of, like, I just get to be me all the time. And like, that's so freaking cool. Like, that's my job is just being me and having conversations. And like, also, what do I keep sacred? What do I share? Like, the responsibility that often content creators feel of, like, I need to, like, keep people up to date with, like, what I'm learning and what I'm doing and like, the codependency that that creates. So it's like, it's a lot.

Can we.

It's a lot to navigate into this. So I'd love to start with just your journey as a content creator and specifically about your experience of being canceled. Because I feel like that's probably the biggest fear that most people have and why they don't share on social media is like, they're afraid of, like, groups of people coming out and modern day witch hunt. And you have to experience that. So can you share your journey with us?

Yeah. Yeah. So similar to you. I've been online for a very, very long time, just about a decade now. And I started when I was similar to you. I was 21 years old, which at that age you don't really know who you are. You're still figuring yourself out. And I think that a lot of people who are younger nowadays get on social media and live as who they are and really learn who they actually are in front of a lot of people. And my experience was getting started on social media in that time when everyone was just sharing what they did. And it wasn't really this thing to be an influencer. It was just the thing to make content because other people were doing it. So the thing that I was interested in at the time was fitness and I Built my whole brand around fitness and doing fitness competitions. And that is what I knew about myself at the time.

So was I.

So I was making four to five YouTube vlogs every single week and people were getting a really intimate look into my life and I loved it and I had a really good time doing it and I was doing all of the right things to grow your audience. I was cross pollinating with YouTube and here's my link for this and make sure you follow me on here and let's do giveaways and all the things that help you grow an audience. And what happened to me was feeling like I hit this point when I was about 23, 24, after three years of really going hard in this, where I asked myself, am I going to do it like this forever? What else is there for me? And people know me as Amanda Bucci Fit, which is my Instagram handle at the time. I remember specifically when I changed from Amanda Buccifit to Amanda Bucci. I don't know if you've ever had an Instagram handle change feel fresh.

And that was the most nerve wracking thing of my life changed right now.

It's so scary because you create. Essentially what you're talking about is you create an identity or a part of your Persona or a part of who you are and you decide, I want to be perceived this way. This is what I'm. And that's what you have to do to build a personal brand. As you decide what you're going to share and how you're going to curate these certain parts of yourself to be most likable to as many people as possible, or to get the most engagement or to get the most success for your business or whatever you're doing and whatever you're selling. And essentially what we're doing is we're taking parts of our psyche and parts of our personality and parts of who we are and amplifying them. And then people are relating to what they know about those parts and what we choose to share. So it creates this really weird emotional and psychological experience where if you're not really aware of what you're doing and what's happening, like you said, it can be extremely scary to pivot or to say, hey, I'm gonna change what I'm doing, or to add a different part of yourself that doesn't really fit the little box that people knew you in. And you know, whether it's making a change or sharing a version of your story or anything that seems like a little. It could be A little bit offensive to someone or a little bit polarizing, which is really everything, if you really think about it. It's everything could be polarizing or challenging or offensive to somebody. It can be extremely terrifying. So I hit a point where I felt very clearly in my own experience of myself, that I needed to not have my personal brand be so associated with what I was doing with my body, which is really what it was. It was, what are you doing with your competitions now? What is your next fitness goal? What are you eating today? And it was not what I needed in my next stage of my journey. I needed to just eat normally and not tell everybody about it, which, you know, having such a strong personal brand. Like, I was one of the few women who were doing fitness YouTubing at the time. Like, I was one of the kind of first people to do it in the way that I was doing it. And a lot more people do it now, which is amazing. But I felt really called to change. So in my change, I found a YouTube, an Instagram video from this guy named Lewis Howes, and he was talking about a mastermind. And I was like, what's a mastermind? I've never heard of that. And I was really interested in joining because you can learn about business. And then I was really excited because a lot of people were asking me how I grew my following and what you did to, you know, grow your business on social media. And that was kind of this natural next step. But the change was extremely jarring for a lot of people, and I was learning a lot in terms of the ways that marketing can feel yucky and learning different sales tactics. And really, again, being a student to something, but also having this experience of feeling like I needed to prove myself of, like, no, I know what I'm talking about. Because a lot of people were creating and asking questions of like, do you really know what you're talking about? Who were you to do this? Who were you to create this program? And that first year that that happened was a really challenging, one of probably the biggest, most challenging pivot I'd ever done.

You start sharing about business and they're like, who are you to share about business? You're a fitness girl. Like, shut the fuck up.

Yeah, pretty much like, you've never been to business school. You've never done this. And of course, there were so many things that I didn't know. And I was like, I'm going to invest in the right mentors. I'm going to make sure that I learn as much as possible. I'M going to make sure that I teach people what I know, but also be clear about what I don't know. And again, everyone who learns something new, we're all in like a student phase of something which I think can be really scary. To show up on social media in your student mentorship padawan phase of really anything can be terrifying because people will point that finger of like, you're not allowed to do this yet. This isn't okay yet. So that same year was the year that I got canceled. And the reason for that was because I did a webinar partnership with a friend of mine I had just met. And the webinar was about healing your relationship with food. And that was less of a common topic at the time. And there's a lot more nuance around that topic now and a lot more, you know, awareness around what kind of language can be problematic for people with eating disorders. And I didn't have awareness. I had some ignorance at the time. And there was some language in the webinar copy that for some people that had difficulties and struggles with eating disorders and people that were aware and had that information of like, oh, that's not okay. There was a three, four, five day like tirade Twitter campaign talking about that I need to go to jail, that I am profiting off of people with eating disorders and I am like praying off of people just to take their money. And as a 24 year old, it was extremely dysregulating. It was extremely terrifying. It felt helpless. What happens when that happens to you, which is why a lot of people get really scared, is it's a modern day witch hunt. It's a modern day witch hunt and there's nothing you can really do or say. Once people are on their tirade, the.

More you try to explain yourself, the more you give them. And I mean, you've seen it happen to me before. And it's like they take that and they create screenshots and they keep going. And it's like it. Few people will understand like the, the attack on your nervous system that this feels like.

Yeah, because you ultimately don't have agency. You ultimately don't have a fair trial of, okay, if you feel this way, let's kind of lay out the facts and like, let's talk about it. That's not necessarily available people because there's no true accountability for people that are commenting because ultimately they can just say whatever they want and not really have accountability. In the book, I really outline what's the relationship expectations that we should have between the creator and the consumer and where are we getting that wrong? Or even where can we just have more awareness and mindfulness around the fact that it is this one to many relationship and we can all be doing better in terms of viewing creators through the lens of like they're also a human being. And also we can consider everything that consumers often say, which does sometimes have validity to it. Sometimes it is helpful to look at what they're saying and be like, okay, I'm missing that perspective. I need to go learn something. But ultimately we also have to find ways to set our own boundaries and the way that we interact with people, because not everybody is in an intimate relationship with us where we have trust.

How are you able to just essentially channel in front of a camera and speak from your heart with such clarity and precision while also being feeling grounded and relatable and not like it's like scripted, because it's not. I'm actually just just talking to you. And I have learned so much about speaking through having this podcast and through listening to my own conversations with people and also studying the art of speaking. And that's why I'm really excited to have put together my very first course, sharing all of this wisdom with you, called Speak with Soul. So this is a 21 day journey that takes you from feeling maybe unconfident in your speaking to fully showing up, shining your light. And I actually guide you step by step to have the confidence enough to record your own podcast intro. So whether you are interested in speaking for your career, such as speaking on stages one day, or you're a coach or healer and you feel like you would gain more clients from speaking and being able to show up more online, or you just want to speak to people in your life in a more clear way, having more deep, meaningful conversation with friends, with lovers, with partners, and just feeling more heard. The Speak with Soul course is for you, so it is available right now. We have a special discount price so you can head over to speakwithsoulcourse.com to learn more about it. I'm super excited to be sharing it with you guys because this course, the results I have seen are tremendous. I have had students who have always felt like they've had this lifelong block in their throat chakra, go on Instagram Live and actually start Instagram Live series where they're interviewing people because they feel so empowered. So if you're interested and curious, it's a really low ticket, affordable course. So it's really for anyone, whether you have some speaking experience, no Speaking experience, or maybe you even have a podcast. You want to take it up to the next level. It really offers everything that I know about speaking to get. Get you started and to get your voice and your message heard out in the world, because it is so deeply needed at this time. So again, head over to speakwithsoulcourse.com and I'm super excited to see you there. I mean, I love how in your book you talk about the different relationships and the different types of trolls and stuff which we can go into. But in my experience, like, the main reason why people don't share on social media, and these are people, you know, I train coaches, and they have incredible ideas and even private practices, but they're so afraid of this being canceled thing of like. And while it has happened to me multiple times at this point, but it doesn't really happen. Like, I actually don't really get haters anymore, which is very interesting. And I'm asking myself, I'm like, I used to had a way smaller audience. I would get a lot more. Why? And I think part of it is an energetic thing of, like, I energetically was not sure about myself and the way that I was showing up. Exactly. So, like, for example, when I first started sharing videos of twerking, then in 2019, I was like, you know, and I was.

Then you're getting that affirmation.

Yeah. And like, first it started with, like, my friend shared it on my. I have this little gay friend, Paul. We went to a twerk class and he shared on his Instagram story, and I like, re shared and then like, deleted it. And then I was like, okay, am I safe? And then, like, I shared a little bit more, and it's like, it's titration, which they talk about a lot in, like, nervous system and trauma healing of like, share a little bit more. Am I safe? Share a little bit more. Am I safe? And I was always, like, kind of pushing myself a little bit, but not too much. Like, I couldn't have gone all out. Like, I am now, even there's levels of all out that I'm still that are coming up for me, that I'm like, I don't even know how much to share. And we can talk about the shadow aspect of that as well. But now. So then at the beginning, people were like, you're an Ayurveda author. Like, why are you sharing yourself twerking? Like, this is inappropriate. And who are you and all of those things. Because I wasn't sure about myself. And as I gained that grounding of actually shaking your ass is fucking sacred. And you're healing generational trauma and you're releasing, you know, like, and the science of shaking. And it's fun and you get to have joy and you get to be in your sensuality, which I feel like now is more culturally accepted, but it wasn't so much.

And you were a pioneer of that, by the way.

Spiritual pioneer, I will say. But now I never get haters from it because it's like, you're just not gonna follow me if this triggers you. And it's not like a, am I safe? Am I not? It's like, bitch, this is who I am. You're either gonna like this or not. And then I feel like that I don't need to learn that lesson anymore. And then, similarly, something happened to me on TikTok that I said something. I made a video and I was like, the feminine path to spirituality is not just seated meditation. It's dancing, singing, being in ritual, community. And then they took like a snippet and they edited it to make it look like I said, like, the totally iconic feminine path to spirituality is not meditation. Like, period. Just there. And then they were like, so you're saying woman can't meditate.

You're social media things.

Yeah, like all of these things. Now I'm. You said the word woman. How dare you say woman. And like, all these things. And it was like. Then I was like, I'm like, guys, I teach meditation. Like, I would never say that. But then they're like, she's trying to defend herself because she can't take ownership. And it was like, right, right. You can't.

The moment you try to defend yourself.

But it made me realize, I'm like, I'm posting my meditation clips, my how to's every day. No one watches them. This fucking clip goes viral. And I'm like, I see why people post controversial content because it's only when something's controversial that people start commenting that it gets boosted up in the algorithm that it's either going to make you be like, oh, my God, I never want to be in this again. It's too much. Or like, oh, shit, I'm going viral. What's the next controversial thing I could say? And that's why social media, especially TikTok, is like an echo chamber of controversy, that when you go on there, you're going to have create this worldview that everyone's just fighting all the time. Because the only videos that are going viral. Viral are the ones that people are Fighting in the comments.

100%. Yeah. And it's such a wild thing to just talk about the dynamics of all of that because again, as someone who might be a new content creator or you're still on your way up and that hasn't happened to you yet, it can feel like you need to avoid it or like you need to do what you can to present a version of yourself that's as likable as possible. But ultimately, and again, you don't have to create controversy for the sake of controversy, but your fullest expression will create controversy anyway. And that's the important thing, which is exactly what you were talking about, of the self ownership, energetic, of when I'm fully connected to my choices and my truth and the things that matter to me. I believe that social media creates the opportunity for you to learn those lessons. Wherever you don't feel fully like you're owning who you are, you're going to have that mirrored back to you on social media. Whether it's like, I need to tell this next story, but I'm really scared and maybe I'm going to keep my platform much more safe and much more calculated and much more just, you know, the way that it is already going. You might find that your content isn't hitting as much or you're not getting the connection or engagement that you're really looking for because there's something else bubbling underneath that you know, you might not be sharing yet. And again, there's always going to be the balance act of what do I keep sacred that's for me and what do I share. But I really believe that if you choose on a personal level and you decide for your own growth, for your own personal brand, what are the things that when you do share them, you know that they're actually going to benefit you, they're going to benefit your brand and you're going to, they're going to benefit other people.

Yeah. And like what I love about what you said is there's really no right or wrong way to do social media. People are often like, how did, how do you grow? And it's like there are some people like holistic psychologists who simply do infographs and that's all they do. And she blew up because she's very good at them, she's consistent at them and they're very shareable. And there are some people who've grown brands through just like personal stories and very raw and uncurated. Like Sophie Jaff is an example. I always think of that. It's just like, hey, like, my kids are having a nervous breakdown, and this is happening with my husband. And, like, life is not all rainbows. And it's like. And people love that vulnerability. And there's, like, every spectrum in between. And I find sometimes, like, what I struggle with is I started my social media, like, you know very much about health, right? I was eat, feel fresh, and I'm teaching about nutrition. I wrote a cookbook and all those things, and it was like Ayurveda. And then I started to share a little bit more about myself and a little bit more. And I always get a great response from it. But then I feel this maybe, like, sense of, like, first a questioning of, like, when do I share these personal things? Like, do you share it when you're in it? Do you share it when you're, like, three years out of it? Like, where. Where is the line of where you share about it? And then also the way that it can, like, invite people's opinions into your experience, like, prematurely as well. And, like, people are like, you know, they just all have their judgments on it. And then people assume if you're putting things out there on social media, it is to be criticized and judged.

Well, you put this out there, right?

So I'm curious, like, your take for someone who's like, okay, I want to use my story, but I don't know, like, should I do what I'm struggling with right now? Should I do what I'm struggling with a few years ago? What's a good barometer?

Yeah, I've sat with that so many times, and every time that there's a new story to tell, I'm like, when is it time to tell it? And even how. What's the format? What's the way that you tell it? What is the structure? What's the point? And something that I've come to is I do it a lot more slowly now than I ever really have in the past. I used to share things a lot more in the middle. And as I've grown in my own process, on my own journey, and I have more tools, more support, and more just, like, understanding of how I need to process for myself in a way that feels safe and comfortable. It's like keeping things sacred is really healthy and really supportive, I think, to my nervous system in a lot of ways to be able to just keep it contained and give it the respect that it deserves. Because very often when you're going through something and it's going to be helpful for your brand to share that story, it's like, at what point do you feel like the energy between you and the people that are going to be consuming it is. Is a clean enough energy for you to be able to.

I find myself too, I don't know if you feel this like while I'm going through something, I think about how I'm going to share it 100% and I'm like, what the fuck? Like, I'm like, already?

Yeah. That's like the person personal brand conundrum is just like, okay, this is gonna be helpful. And I think that that's a really beautiful thing about social media is that so many people are going through things in their lives and sharing the story and the amount of consciousness evolution just from that is really incredible. And also every content creator gets to decide on a very personal level, what can I keep. That is really my personal self honoring process. That will take some time. Cause every personal process isn't just gonna be like a one thing. Very often I like to feel into, okay, what still has to happen in my process or am I feeling like I'm really emotionally dysregulated still? When I first shared about my polyamorous relationship on social media, which was a very fun social experiment, it was definitely one of like the big controversial things I've ever done. But my question to myself was, will I be okay if people ask me questions that I still don't have the answer to yet? Because it was true. There was a lot of questions that I still didn't have the answer to yet of like, what is it gonna look like when you're married or have kids? And there were so many things for me to process and go through. But there was this line of feeling like, okay, if I don't share about this relationship, it actually will feel inauthentic. It will feel like I'm hiding something. And I don't want to hide things just because they are taboo or people are going to have an opinion about it. But I also need to protect myself and my own emotional process. So I had to get okay with not having all the answers and to know that there's gonna be so many projections coming in to know that, okay, I'm aware projections are gonna come in. I'm aware people are gonna have opinions. I'm aware they might be challenging for me. But at least I have chosen and fully owned my decision, that it feels true for me right at this point. And I also am owning the fact that I still have a lot of journey to go.

And Your Q&As I love so much. You Frequently just have this question box and you're like, ask me anything. I feel like you're. I always see you doing them and you really open up. Yeah. And you're vulnerable.

And there's many things I don't share.

And many things you don't share, too. And in what you share, it feels like you're really letting us into your experience. And you put a lot of time and energy into answering questions that even could be really triggering that a lot of people would not answer those questions. And I really, like, value you, that about you. And it's made me start doing more of these. Ask me any things. Because it's made me wonder, like, yeah, like, I could be putting content out there, but what are the questions people actually have for me, which might be something totally different. I'm often even surprised by it. And you share a lot about your polyamorous relationship on social media, but your work is not really in relationships now. It's. It's a little bit, but it's more on, you know, spirituality and business and this and that. Did you ever have this fear of, like, if I start sharing my personal life, people aren't going to take me seriously as a coach?

Yeah, 100%. 100%. Like, the boxes that we feel like we're supposed to be in in terms of professionalism, in terms of what people are going to think if I start sharing about my personal life. Because I got started as an influencer, I always felt this, like, kinship to the influencer experience, which was really just share whatever your personal life is and the people that are going to be there are going to be there. And then as a coach, it's more of, like, professional educator, making sure that you are teaching people and embodying what you teach and sharing concepts and sharing practical tips and helping people in their own process as well. But again, everyone can do social media so differently. And I do believe that there's, like, a context for everybody. There's some people I follow that don't share anything about their personal life. And maybe they're just a meme account or an education account. Great. That's amazing as well, for my own personal process. And I've kind of unpacked this through just my human design. We're both printing. Yeah. We're both projectors.

You're a six. Two.

Yeah. Four.

Six.

Okay, great. The six. The six line. The role model of, like, we're supposed to be. You're splenic. Yeah.

Me too. Same person.

Would love to look at your chart.

Yes.

Yeah, we're supposed to be living in front of people and sharing our personal process. And again, not everyone's gonna be that, but I've chosen for myself that that is actually how I feel best existing as a content creator. That might not be true 100% of the time, all the time, but for now, it feels really important for me to extrapolate what I've learned, the lessons I've learned from my personal experience, and then help people unpack their shame and their stories about who they're supposed to be and whether that is through my book, followed of. Here's the experience of being a content creator and all the expectations you can let go of of who you think you're supposed to be or in relationships and all the expectations you can let go of of who you think you're supposed to be in relationships or just with yourself and your process. And I love having kind of the opportunity to do any of that now. And I've been morphing my personal brand over the years to be more holistic, to be able to talk about, you know, all of these things. And again, the more that you follow what feels true to you as a content creator, the more your brand is going to really mirror and represent, like, the bigness of what you can provide.

Yeah, you know, I've really been sitting with, like, why do I share on social media? And, like, this majorly came up in my medicine ceremony of, like, what are the parts of me that are doing it for validation, that are doing it so people like me that are doing it for attention, where is that coming from and owning that? And, like, going into my childhood of, like, where did I want my dad to pay attention to me so I could be the trophy child and, like, be enough for him? And, like, how that could be related to how I'm showing up online? And like, and then, like, this sense of responsibility that I feel, and I'm sure you and many people have of, like, I just feel responsible for, like, helping people and sharing what I'm going through and, like, needing to be on and like. And so I had to really, like, ask myself of, like, yeah, how much of this is codependency? How like, like, even ask yourself, is this actually helping people? And I really go there. Is it go there, you know, is. Is me living my best life and them watching me actually helping them. And, like, I had to really fully go into, why am I even doing this? And I was able to come into this understanding of I just feel alive when I'm sharing my full expression and When I'm sharing stories and like, I literally could cry talking about it because for so long, like, I feel like for myself and a lot of us, we just wanted to be seen, you know, we wanted to be heard. We wanted to be understood at a core level. Yeah. And, like, that's what social media allows us to do. It's allows us to be our unfiltered selves. And we're putting ourselves out there vulnerably to strangers who may criticize us and make fun of us and whatever they might do. But the fact that you can find those people who resonate with your message at this time makes you feel so much less alone and so much more connected. And then to see the community that that creates, I'm like, yes. Sometimes social media takes me out of my experience of being in it because I can start analyzing how I'm going to share it. Yes. I can be addicted to. And I often have to delete it off of my phone because I'll. Especially if I'm working. Keep checking, keep checking, keep checking. Yes. How many people watch my stories? How many people like this post? I fucking do all that shit, you know? Yeah. And it's still worth it for me because I'm able to be myself and share my story and help other people through that. And there's no other career in the world that I would be able to do this with.

Yeah, I completely agree. That's exactly how I feel as well. And I think the important thing to note is even, like, being able to go there is so commendable because it just really has you check yourself of not avoiding the fact that those things are really present and they're present for all of us. They're present for every single content creator. And we all have to grapple with, okay, where am I not having boundaries with people? And what does that mean about my boundaries within myself? And how does that connect back to my patterns of not having people pleasing or whatever the actual patterns are? And it is a mirror. And there's a chapter in the book called the nine Stages of Personal Branding. And I modeled it after the Spiral Dynamics psychological development model.

We love the spiral dynamics here.

Spiral dynamics is great, but it really maps the same thing with personal branding as well. And the last stage after you kind of go through this, like, okay, I figured out what I want to talk about. I figured out the system that works for me and these people. As you move through the later stages of the psychological development model, you come into this place where you still will change and you will evolve and you will have attachments to the way that it's all set up and working for you because you got the thing you. You feel understood and you have people that get you. And then you're going to go through experiences where some of those people will leave, some of those people still won't get this new version of you. Some of those people will not validate you. You will have to maybe adjust your brand to be in full connection to your fullest expression. And the final stage is this transcendence stage where you really can look at yourself objectively and look at your patterns objectively and be like, how can I let go of caring about or being attached to how many people follow how many people are watching what's happening? Because ultimately I need to follow what feels right and true for me. And whoever is going to show up is going to show up and we're going to be in a beautiful dynamic together. But how can I release my attachments to the identity that I've curated to the brand? That helps me get the validation that I need. And that will come from the way that you will have to move around with your personal brand and how it looks on the outside to people to match how you feel on the inside.

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. To create your dream life, you first need to be clear on what that is for you. And we spend so much time just chasing goals and other people's expectations that we don't really take that time to really ask ourselves, what do I want? You know, where do I want to live? What do I want to do for my work? What kind of friendships, relationships do I want? And that's where therapy comes in. It really allows you to be true to yourself, to be honest with yourself and to have your insights reflected back with a trained professional. And this is why I love BetterHelp. I'm such a huge advocate of everyone having a therapist and they make it really convenient, affordable and flexible. So you fill out a brief questionnaire online. You get matched with the perfect therapist for you, which you can also try out different ones to find your soulmate one. And you get to talk to them both through the app and on video calls online from the comfort of your own home. So I really recommend them for anyone that wants to get more support. So to get started on your journey, head over to betterhelp.com Sahara that's betterhelp h lp.com Sahara S A H A R A. You can find that link in the show notes and I think it's so important just to think about, like, who are those people you're really speaking to? Because if we focus on the number, it's so vague. And this number, like, like, you know, in a way it doesn't. It's. These numbers are so mind boggling that you can't comprehend them. Like, I can't imagine what does a million people look like? And a million people a month listen to this fucking podcast. I'm like, what? What?

I can't.

When I see like one person on Erewhon that recognizes me, I'm like, how do you know who I am?

I'm at home alone all the time.

This is weird.

Yeah, you're at home alone on your home alone.

And it's like, so that's what's so weird about it of like, so we become numb or we become. Who watch the story. And you're like so focused on these things that you, like, forget. So I keep going back to like, okay, who do I know are like my people. And these are people who are like in rose gold goddesses. These are people who are in dci. These are people I know, I know their energy. And I'm just like, I just think about how is this landing for them?

Yeah, 100%.

And I feel like too, with the algorithm, it actually really is a small percentage of the people who follow you who end up seeing your stuff. So you might as well, I feel like cater it to them rather than try to create this like really neutral content that like might reach a bunch of people, but it's not saying anything.

Yeah, I love to think about if the people that are following that love my most authentic self, what would I know about them? What would I have awareness of who they are? If they're like down for me and they're down for whatever I've been through, maybe they've been following the whole time. Maybe they have watched through all the changes or even if they haven't at this point, if they're consuming my content, what might I know about who this person is? And it helps me feel really connected and safe again. Even if I don't know who they are. There's some people that are clients and people that do the programs that you connect to. And maybe there's people that you talk to in your DMs all the time where you're just like, this person's just talking to me a lot. And like, they have a lot to resonate with here. And I think that really helps make the concept of who's following You a lot less abstract, like you're saying, and a lot more relational, which I think is where you're going to get the most impact.

Do you make your content thinking, okay, this is my piece of content that I know is like going to go viral and reach people who aren't following me. This is my stuff to build my relationship with people who follow me, give them updates on my life. This is for like the real, like, do you map it out like that? Or did you used to. I've heard of people doing this.

Yeah, I used to a little bit more when I was more like diligent with knowing that, you know, you can do these processes and you can get certain outcomes. Like, if you create content like this that speaks to these people, it will create more new followers. And I do that a lot less now. Like, when I wrote the book, I wrote it in such a way that if people who didn't follow me already read it, they wouldn't feel like they were just coming in on some conversation that already was happening with a bunch of other people.

Because that's a huge thing. Think people are watching all of our posts, reading everything, following us for years. A lot of people just started following you yesterday and have no idea who you are. And we forget to reintroduce ourselves, tell our stories.

Yep, 100%. Yeah. And I definitely feel like as a someone that, you know, you can get into these patterns of just feeling comfortable with the people that you are already connected to and that are already following you. So I can definitely get into a pattern of, like, these people know me, I feel comfortable with them. I don't have to react, explain myself, or, you know, re get new people to understand me. But I feel like we can go through seasons and being intentional about knowing when it's time to expand out your brand is just speaking in a different way and really reintroducing yourself, retelling your story. And I haven't done that in a while, so I'm gonna do that when.

I go, I know I need to do that too. Like, I know for me, if I post anything that's like remotely political or social justice oriented, it tends to go viral simply because of the controversy that it creates. So when I post what's happening in my parents home country of ir, those always go viral because I have a lot of haters on those people who are like, oh my God, so many people. Like, these women deserve to be killed. Like, if you're not wearing a headscarf, you should go to jail. Like, if you look It's. And sometimes. And I question, I'm like, okay, should I. Where should I block these people or not? Because I think it's important for people to actually see, like, there are people who hate women out there and they're commenting on my posts.

Yeah, 100%.

But then sometimes it gets. Gets really bad that I'm like, okay, this is just like, not good to have out. So I'm curious for you, and I know you write about this in your book when we get hater comments, like, where should we block versus restrict versus engaging with them.

Yeah. I really like what you said about being able to know that it is helpful for some of these people who don't have your perspective to be able to have access to your content. Because it might seed. Plant some seeds or it might allow them to see the.

And then they sometimes debate with each other, which I think is really helpful.

Yeah, I think that's super helpful. Like, it's almost like as content creators, we have to be this avatar or character that represents an idea and a concept so people can have their own conversations.

You can't take it so personally.

Yeah, yeah. And the way that I kind of decide that for myself is if someone is being extremely rude or extremely hurtful to other people or they're just saying a lot of things that are getting really intense or really slimy or really dark, that that isn't actually helping the conversation. That's when I'll delete or block stuff. But for the most part, I kind of let people do their thing and I'm just like, this is a conversation that you guys are having amongst yourselves through this piece of content that, yes, I made. But it is really an idea that you guys all have ideas about as well.

Yeah, yeah. I feel like with the hater comments, like, in 2020, it was a thing like, do not delete. You know, it's violent to delete.

Oh, yeah, you're blocking people's voices.

Right. But then it, like, I had one post I made about like the ICE detention centers, which are the centers on the Mexican border where they basically put children in cages and how wrong that is. Which.

Correct.

You wouldn't think it'd be a controversial thing to say, but they're like, you know, it just went viral and it just turned into this like, anti Trump thing. But then all the comments started coming to me of like, you're a sheeple, you're this, or then you're on the other side of you're that. And it was just like, like, and then that's when I was like, okay, because I didn't want to block and delete because I knew the importance of letting the dialogue happen, but it got so crazy and so personal. And then I'm holding on to all of this, and then I'm constantly checking my phone. I can't even think of anything else.

Mental health.

Yeah. It was so bad for my mental health for a few days, and eventually I. I actually wish I blocked some of those people earlier.

Yeah. 100.

Didn't let it get that bad.

Yeah. And, like, the way that. The way that I think about it is like, it's your living room. You know, like, you can be having a debate in your living room, and you're like, okay, you know, people can be here. Like, you're following, you're here, but you can still have boundaries with the way that people show up in the debate or the conversation. And you don't need to just allow every single thing to happen just because there is a space for it to happen. I think that it's really important for us to decide as creators and as people that are having these controversial conversations, what will we allow in terms of the way that people communicate versus what will we not allow, which is when you have to enforce boundaries and set consequences for people.

Yeah, yeah. Like, I think that as we grow in our nervous system capacities, we can hold a lot more. So at the beginning, when there was a slight tinge of hate, I would block because I couldn't handle it. Whereas now I'm like, I would try.

To convince people to get on my side. I would fawn, fawn response.

Okay, Yeah. I would just be like, fight, flight, flight, flight. I would get so scared of mine because of my witch hunt past life that, like, the moment there was one hater, I'm like, I need to block this before it turns into a crescendo of them that I was, like, playing Mario, like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And now I'm like, blah, whatever. It helps the algorithm.

Yeah, okay.

I can't even read that.

You have more space, though. Like, you, number one. Like, you know what's gonna happen. You're like, okay, this is what's gonna happen, and this is probably how I'll feel. But you have awareness and less uncertainty. And also, you've processed in past experiences, and you have built that nervous system capacity of being able to hold more things, but that's also because you have that recognition within yourself of, like, I trust myself to know when the boundary is happening so I can end it before it gets really difficult for me. Yeah.

And I think, like, you differentiate between, like, a troll, which you say is just like, can you tell us about those different kind of types of haters we get?

Yeah. So I talk about the difference between a troll, a critic, and a hater. And the troll is, like, just an agent of chaos, really. Like, they're just like, you dumb bitch. And, like, just. They say stuff that you're just like, that is the most ridiculous shit I've ever seen.

I would love, like, a docuseries on trolls. Like, where do they live? What do they like, like.

Yeah, yeah.

They must really hate themselves.

Yeah, clearly. Yeah, 100%. And those people, it's like, there's less of a need to take it personally because it's a lot more obvious that it's about them and less about you.

It's always a private account with no. No profile picture.

Right, Right.

And it's just like. And I wonder. I'm like, are these the same, like, 10 trolls on all of our accounts, just keep making more accounts? It's like, what gratification do you get out of making anonymous account and saying, you dumb?

Yeah, okay, moving on.

Yeah, it's like, you're just gonna get.

Blocked and, like, have to make a.

New email and make a new account. It's just. It's sad. We need the docu series. Netflix, please.

Agent of Chaos.

Yeah. Yeah, I would love that. The.

The hater is a little bit more difficult because the hater is gonna be the person that. They might have some feedback for you that's useful, but they're expressing it in such a way that is like, hitting on your stuff and stabbing you and twisting the knife in.

They're like, I've been following you for.

Three years, and I know everything about you and your character flaws are this. And I can see that you have a pattern of blah, blah, blah, and it's like, you are really washing.

And then they pitch their own thing in the middle.

Yeah.

DM me for a free reading. Yeah, Right.

You'll probably take those things the most personally. And also, you're not gonna get a good conversation out of them again. I used to try to converse with.

Those people, use that to actually build their followings.

Yes.

They go and they write a hateful comment so they get a bunch of likes.

Oh, there are whole YouTube channels all about, you know, like, there's a YouTube video about me, like, taking a full screenshot of my Mastermind sales page and walking through it line by line and talking shit about this. And that and, like, how could you just. But there's whole accounts that are dedicated to that.

They know it will get views.

They know it'll get views. And, like, we can all have conversations with tmz.

It's hating on other people, right?

Yeah, Gossip, magazines, whatever. It'll get views. People are interested in the Kool Aid, and they're gonna have conversations about you if you're a public figure in any kind of way. So those people I keep my distance from as much as possible. I've also learned to just view them. Like, there was this one I did a couple weeks ago, actually, where I was talking about switching between the energy of writing a book to getting and doing the PR podcast tours for the book. And I wrote the word code switching. And I didn't know that code switching was when a minority group, maybe, like, Spanish people speak Spanish, but they will speak English in front of white people so they can be more accepted. And I didn't know that the term was used for that. I had an ignorance in that moment. Two people messaged me. One person was fairly kind about it, and they were like, hey, I don't think you meant to use this in this way. This is what this really means. And then the other person was fairly rude about it, but I sent them both the same message. I was like, oh, thank you so much. I appreciate you sending this to me. I'll adjust. And in that moment, I could have had a conversation with the person about how rude they were or whatever, but I've learned to not take as much personally as possible because I don't have the energy for it either. So just let that go and then moved on, and then took accountability and adjusted course, which is what is helpful to do. And then a critic is someone that actually sees and recognizes you in a certain way, but they have a perspective and want to provide some feedback that is going to help you see more of what you're not seeing. But they're doing it in more of a respectful way. They might not be kind, but at least they'll be mostly respectful. And they want to have a dialogue.

Benefit of the doubt.

Benefit of the doubt. Open to dialogue, open to conversation, and open to being in something with you, not just trying to project what they think you are or who they think you are and decide this is just what it is. And now I'm going to not like this person and like, this is just their character.

And I think that that's so important to differentiate because sometimes, like, the like, I have found I'll get Some comments. And I'm just like, okay, is this like a critic or a hater? I don't even know if I should respond. And there are times that I was kind and I responded, and that person just, like, kept being super snappy. And I'm like, I shouldn't have done that. Whatever, block. And there are times that that person's like, thank you so much for replying. And we both learned something. And I'm so grateful that I responded. And it's like, you just have to use your discernment and you never know. But I do think that, yes, there is a nuance of we're just human doing the best that we can, and we have platforms and can spread. You know, even the word misinformation is so misused. Right. What is true? But it's true of, like, you know, doing our best. Yeah, we're doing our best. Like, for example, a few years ago, I shared something about Palo Santo and how Palo Santo.

I think I remember this.

Yeah. So what I read online was for us to not use Palo Santo because the tree is going endangered, because the palo santo tree needs to naturally fall down and the wood needs to basically ferment and age over time. And that's what gives it its scent. Whereas now, because it's so popular, it's on Amazon set Forever 21. They're like, just, like, cutting down all these trees, and it's not even real Palo Santo. And it said the indigenous people are asking us to. So for me, if I'm reading this and it's coming from a Palo Santo indigenous, like, activist website.

Right.

It felt like good information to be shared. So I shared it. And it went viral because of a lot of people agreeing. But then specific people who owned Palo Santo companies saying that this was really bad for their business. And there are Palo Santo companies that are doing it in this righteous way. And I need to take this post down because now their business sales are gonna go down and, like, as if I'm, like, the one responsible.

Yeah.

But it was so crazy because I was confused. I didn't know what the truth was here, you know, because some people are telling me to do this, some people are doing that. Then it turned into this whole conversation around, like, because you're not indigenous, you should not even share about Palo Santo. And then it turned into a cultural appropriat thing. But then I was like. It was so confusing for me. So, like, I feel like that's why a lot of people don't share social justice things, because you're gonna get hit from every single angle. So it's like, but then if we don't, then people are like, you don't care about causes? Yeah, it's like it's on both ends. Like, I share a lot about what's happening in Iran because my parents are from there. But then people are like, why aren't you sharing what's happening in Armenia, Sri Lanka, this country, that country? And I'm like, I just don't know enough about it that I don't want to share something and it do more harm.

Yeah, exactly. And that's the super important thing. I think that came out of 2020, where it was no longer acceptable for content creators, brands and businesses to hide behind not having social stances or political views. Cause a lot of customers are really interested and devoted to voting with their dollars now and just making sure that the people they follow have value alignment with them. And also the other thing that came from that was so much misinformation being shared or, or just people talking about things that they didn't really know a lot about. I had many of those experiences as well where I was like, okay, I can share about this and I'll share about this. I was like, I don't have enough research or information and a lot of new information is being revealed and like, which, you know, resources.

There's so many sides to any story. I mean, which is why we have.

Political divide in the first place.

Exactly. And I also question. Cause you do write about, like, how back in the day a celebrity was someone that you just liked their work, you liked their music, you liked their tv, whereas now we're almost expected to know a celebrity, these political views.

Yeah.

And it's like, what, so you're gonna vote for this purse Democrat or Republican based on like, what Zayn Malik voted for?

Like, Right? Yeah.

Why? Why do we care so much?

Yeah, it's. It's wild. It's a wild, wild, wild.

But I do get that, like voting for your dollar thing and making our profile stand for something greater. But I have found it's like just pick one or two causes and really stand for that thing and know all the sides and nuances of it. Like, if you start sharing what's happening in Iran, you didn't grow up, up.

Yeah.

My whole life I've heard about this conversation and I still don't know everything to it. But that's why I feel like this is something that I can share about. Whereas if I just go into, you know, whatever thing I just heard about I would. I could spend the rest of my life and not totally know anything and I'm. I'm still gonna make someone upset. 100 so it's like finding. It's like don't be silent. But also don't feel like just because someone sent you something you need to repost it because it's not the total truth.

Yeah, 100% agree. Yeah. That's like my approach as well is just picking the things that I can talk about, like stuff about abortion and being a woman and then also stuff about LGBTQ rights and trans rights and things that I have a lot of information about and communities that I'm a part of and being able to just pick and choose what those things are. So again, it's not like total silence and just this is my little platform where I talk about this. But being able to continue to take responsibility for the platform that I do have. And again, everyone's choice about what they are going to take responsibility for is different. But I also think that that really goes to show as well how many people want to have a huge brand and what does it really take to have a bigger brand beyond just having the things that you talk about, like the topics that you want to be known for. Amazing. But I also think that the more you grow, the more responsibility you have. Like with great power comes great responsibility and, and being able to recognize like, it is like the way that you are talking about what you do on your platform is coming from someone that recognizes the power that you have and recognizes the power dynamic there and the responsibility that is really important to recognize.

So for someone listening who's like, I really feel called to show up more as a content creator online, but I feel like I'm too late in the game and I don't really know how to get started. What would you suggest sharing with personal stories with reels, like what do you feel like is really like working right now?

I think what's working today is like an organized strategy paired with authenticity. Being able to figure out like, okay, what's the most me possible versus I think before we could kind of just go with the flow of like. I remember in the fitness industry when I first started the flow was pretty much doing photo shoots and like a sports bra and booty shorts, like with.

What I eat in a day, what.

I eat in a day. Or like on the back of the, of a bench with oiled up body and it was hot modely fitness stuff. And I was like, this is the only thing that's available. So figuring out now that there is so much available, the choice is less, okay, let me follow the pathway of what other people have done and more, what pathway do I want to carve out for myself? And seeing what the options are, but being able to pick and choose what feels true to me, what feels authentic to me, and also what works with my skillset. If you want to write, write. If you want to talk, talk. If you want to do a blend of the two, beautiful. And there's so many different mediums and formats that can work with whatever feels like your core skillset versus the things that you want to grow into and get better at. But I really do think having a solid strategy and a plan of what do you want to be known for? What is the message that you want to send? What is the mission you're standing behind? What is the vision that you have for what you want to carve out of your own little corner of the Internet? And if you ask yourself that, a lot will probably come up. But coming up with a plan for, okay, what am I gonna do for these first three months to really get myself established? What do I need to establish that feels true about me? Probably your story. Probably a story that connects to the topics that you wanna talk about, the industry you wanna be in, and even just establishing some core pieces of content that will be really memorable for you and for people. And if you really just think about, if people just found me today, there's nothing on my page for them to consume. Maybe they know a bunch of stuff from other people on social media. But I think at this point, there's so much that people can still say, it's not too late. And the reason for that is it's just a little bit different. And the difference really is a sea of people saying the same thing versus people that really have a perspective that isn't just different, but they're really owning their perspective and they're really owning the blend of the things that they want to talk about and the way that they want to say them and express them. And I do think social media is becoming more competitive in a way, because it's less easy to skate by and just do what everybody else is doing. At this point, I really do think that owning your perspective, owning your story, expressing yourself authentically, and coming up with a strategy that, you know will be supportive to getting the eyeballs and the engagement that would be most helpful for you to grow. But if you decide to do a combination of those things and do it in a way that feels workable and simple and exciting and enjoyable for you. It really is still, I believe, bound to work.

I love that. Finding what's consistent for us. Are we that person that wants to write long form captions? Are we that person that thrives making memes? I noticed in myself, I kept saving memes all the time. I'm like, why don't I just make memes? And I have so much fun doing them now with my little Pinterest board. And then like, infographs or. I feel like often it's like the content that we are consuming is really what we would want to create because that's why we're attracted to it. I found in my own practice, like, sharing myself, dancing and like, doing things in my life, it shows rather than tells. Like, I could be like, 10 steps to be joyful and it's like. Or I can, like, show you me in my joy. Like, it creates that proof of, like, this is possible. So I love all of those tips, and I feel like, yeah, it's. It's really never too late. In fact, there's still so much opportunity when you have, like, a. A fresh voice and a fresh take and putting together those pieces of the box of, like, maybe you worked in corporate, but you're also into BDSMs. Like, how do you bring them together? And it's like, that's what we want. We want to see, like, the unique points converging and how you made them converge in your own life, because that shows us that we can take different parts of ourselves and bring them together. And I feel like you do that. Like, I'm not in a polyamorous relationship, but I love reading all of your things about it because it's just interesting. For me, it's a new worldview, and it makes me just, like, know your heart and your soul more, which would make me more likely to just want to do your. Your writing and your business workshops and all the things like that. Even though it's not exactly related, but it's you being you.

Yeah. Yeah. And I love what you said about the points converging, and that's what people really want to see, like, the way that I see social media now, because it has gotten to this point where we are not sequestering parts of ourselves as much as we have in the past. And we're bringing things together and we're talking about how do we be multifaceted and how do we bring all these parts of us to the stage and have them all blend together in a way that makes sense. I think a lot of content creators are going through that, especially because we've had social media for like a decade and a half, two decades now, and we've all gone through different evolutions and iterations of ourselves. And it really is creating like, it's like its own little book, like its own narrative, its own story. And if you walk people through that story and that narrative and you have clear bridges between this part and this part, because your life makes sense to you, your experience makes sense in your world, and it's really just about being able to bridge those gaps for other people so they can see it as well. And there's so much that I think we can get out of people being able to do that in their own personal way. And the beauty is really being able to find anything that you need from, like, in the exact specific way that you need it nowadays, because that's what people are doing. And some of the people that I love following now are like, you're saying the literal. Like there's so many people saying kind of the same thing, but you're saying it in the way that I really need to hear it because of your perspective, your language, your story that you're telling, it's like the exact. Oh, it's like hitting in the soul. And that's what's available for content creators out there. When you really do own those different parts of yourself and you bring the narrative together in a way that is going to impact the exact right person.

And what you said is so key. Like, that to me is like really the takeaway of, like, being a social media content creator, of, like, taking those different points, but the conscious awareness of, like, showing them to people. Yeah, that's really all we're doing. It's like we're living normal lives. It's just we are now taking. This is how it. Of showing it. Right. Like, we would have just had this conversation regularly. We took the step of, like, being here and like, showing and. And that. And it's like, like you. So it's not even that you need to, like, change yourself or come up with new content or whatever. The thing is, it's like that thing that you're going through. You don't even need to share what it is that you're going through. Right? But you can just share. Like, I'm feeling in a funk right now. Like, you've been sharing that you're feeling in a funk. You didn't share why you're feeling in a funk, but you're sharing. I've been shaking. I've been doing this, I've been doing that, that it's like, I don't need to know exactly what's happening in your life, but we can all relate to feeling in a funk. So it's like, I feel like there's so many ways that we can still maintain our privacy and not tell our stories and hold them sacred to us until or if we feel called to share them, but still extrapolate our process. And that's really what it's all about.

Yeah, the being able to share the process is really what everyone's looking for anyway. The messy middle, the moments in between. It's not just the culmination of, okay, this is how I got to where I am today. It's like, this is how I'm processing my day to day. This is what I'm doing on a day to day to get me to where I want to go. But I'm still in the journey, I'm still in the process. These are the things that I feel like I've completed. But life at the end of the day, like, again, the way that we're having this conversation is really such a mirror to how life works anyway. We're not ever gonna be at the top of a mountain and then be done. That's not how it works. But that's how it feels like it needs to be. This linear thing, whether it's with spirituality and your journey, or with social media or with business, it feels like there's a top of the mountain to reach. But ultimately it's just about being in your process and extrapolating the lessons from that. So if that's what you do on social media, or even if you're just sharing joy and comedy and entertainment, that's also representing a version of the human experience. That's literally what we're all doing is we're taking a version of the human experience, we're putting it into content and sharing it. And people are like, yes, that, I get that, that meme is funny. Or this piece of content is exactly so helpful to my process right now. Whether you're in personal development or not, not. We're all just taking human experience and turning it into content.

And that's why social media really is such a reflection of our consciousness. The pages that we follow, it's what is the algorithm of your life? You know that's going to be the algorithm of your social media. If there's a discrepancy there, it's like, really, look at that. And I love in your book, you talk about like unfollowing and who do we unfollow? And verse muting sometimes. And you just have all of these different nuances that I feel like we've all thought about and sat with. But you actually, like write them down step by step in your, Your new book followed it. Yeah, it's the process and it's. And it's amazing. It's been incredible to witness you like, living your journey of this in the past few years. And I feel like for some of us, maybe it's a six spleenic projector thing or just, I don't know, it's a soul thing. But like, social media has been an integral part of my spiritual journey.

Yeah, like 100.

It always has been. And it's always in the back of my mind. And it's something that, like, I keep, keep coming back to time and time again of like, you know, it's like that, are we in a toxic relationship? It's like, I fucking love you. You know, it's like, how do we make this better? And when we can take it as such, we can see it as this gift that it is of like, you don't need to have a publicist and a book and get on Oprah to get your message out there. Like, like how you had to back in the 90s even. It's like now any person right now can grab their phone and say something and create ripple effects in the world. And we recognize deep the power that that holds. It's like, yes, there's many shadow aspects, but like, we are, I mean, we have been changing the world through social media. Revolutions are happening through social media. Elections are changing through social media. Things that we would have never known about.

Yeah, through social media movements. Like. Yeah, like, like social causes, the way that we view ourselves, identity stuff. Like there's. There's so much happening because people are making content about their lives on social.

Media and even consciousness of like, you know, I follow mostly spiritual people, but then I see, okay, you know, people are diving into this modality ice baths. And then it like, inspires me and it reminds me.

Or people are just the shadow side of this spiritual thing. And this is like just getting all of the context. Like watching consciousness evolve through social media is so cool.

It's so fascinating. Even like spirituality, I mean, this could be a whole episode and it's like, yeah, you can say that that person took a conscious step of putting their phone down and meditating in front of it to show you that I'm meditating and you can see the shadow in that. But also maybe I needed that reminder for me to meditate.

Exactly. Exactly.

So there's a lot there and you go into it in your new book followed. So where can people find it?

Yes, you can get it on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, all of the local bookstores. It'll be out on June 6, which is so exciting. And you can go to amandabuchi.com followed as well to find all the bonuses and. And fun things.

Well, I love you so much and you really just embody your talk so deeply and you've done so much work around this and like, really diving into not just social media, but like consciousness in general. And like, I feel like what your gift is, is you maintain such neutrality of looking at all of the different perspectives. And so I just.

The libra.

Yeah, it's the libra, the nine.

I think you're nine in the enneagram with you.

But it's so beautiful. And I know that this book is going to help so many people get their messages out there. So thank you for writing it.

Thank you so much. Thank you so much for having me and introducing everything to your people and your community. Of course.

So be sure to check out her new book followed. And if you loved this episode, please leave a review for it in the iTunes store and you will get my free womb meditation. So this is a meditation for you to connect to your sacred womb space and ask any questions that you might have so you can listen to your body's wisdom. So all you gotta do is leave a review for it on the Apple store, take a screenshot and email it over to me@saharamshaharrose.com and you can find that in the show notes. Also, be sure to check out our new embodiment coach certification, which trains you to become a certified embodiment coach, using the body's wisdom to help you unlock deeper awareness in yourself and in your clients. I want to thank you guys so much for being here today and I'll see you in the next episode. Sa.