555: My Ayahuasca Experience + Lessons Learned with Sahara Rose

I had no idea what I would see, learn, become, feel, experience. But I surrendered and I said, whatever it is, whatever is in the highest good and specifically for me, anything that is holding me back from love. And that was my intention for this entire week. Anything that is holding me back from experiencing true love in this lifetime, I'm willing to see it, face it, and experience it. Welcome back to the Highest Self podcast. My name is Sahar Rose, and on this podcast I've been rocking for almost eight years now. I like to take spirituality matters at the heart, matters of the soul, those big picture questions and kind of bring it down to earth a little bit. Maybe we keep it up there, we'll see which way it goes. But one thing is we keep it fun. That's for show. And before we drop into this episode, be sure to hit subscribe wherever you're listening to this podcast. That is the best way to stay up to date on the latest episodes. We've got this in video format, so if you're just hearing my voice, be sure to also watch our fabulous outfits on video as well on Spotify, YouTube or the Apple Store. This is the best way to stay in the flow with future conversations and also allows the podcast to reach more people. So hit subscribe so I can keep vibing with you on all future episodes. Now, let's get into this one. So I just got back from spending two weeks in the Sacred Valley of Peru, where I have gone deeper than I ever have my entire life. I wasn't even sure if I would make a podcast about this because this topic is so sacred and deep, personal sensitive. And if there's one thing I've learned in my lifetime, is that the experiences that I have moved through are not just for me, but they're for me to go into first personally, but then to when I find my way on the other side, share the wisdom, the messages that I've received. And my gift is my communication, my ability to put words into these intangible things that you may have also really felt and experienced as well. And it just shows how interrelated the human experience experience is. These themes are universal, these archetypes are universal. We're all moving through these ebbs and flows in life. And sometimes we feel so alone, like we're the only ones. But know that whatever you are experiencing and feeling at one point, every human on planet Earth has felt that at the same time, that sadness, that grief, that despair, the confusion, but also the joy and the love, we've all felt these emotions and we feel sometimes we're the only one because we're attached to our unique story around it, but it's actually the feeling that we're either running from or searching for. So. But before, like, we're already in it, we're in the container. Guys, I just came back from three ceremonies. I sat with Grandmother Ayahuasca and two days of Grandfather Wachuma San Pedro. So before I get into it, this is my medical claim that I am not a doctor or a physician. I am not telling anyone what they should or should not do. In fact, the word should was the only word that made me want to everywhere. So just let's, let's vomit that word out of our vocabularies. I will be sharing more of a story around that. I'm just sharing my personal experience, but more than my experience of like, well, like, did you vomit? Or like, did was it this or was it that? It's not so much about like, what it was, but it's about the lessons. And as someone who has written books, I have four books out there, three of which Deepak Cho wrote the foreword of. I'm here to share wisdom and knowledge with you. And what the medicine showed me was not just for me and the specific group of souls that I impact through this podcast and through my work. We're a really specific frequency of people. We're a frequency of people that are heart centered, that are joy based, that play and laugh, but are also really deep and ancient. And many of us have reincarnated from ancient civilizations with this indigenous wisdom within us that we remember the ways of the womb, the ways of the earth, the ways of, of. Of woman coming together, men also coming together. Us being in tribe and circle and dance and harmony and music and co creation and living in alignment with the seasons and cycles. It's a very specific frequency of people who I resonate with. So if you're here, some of these messages may be for you. Like a buffet. Take what serves you and leave apart what doesn't. So I know the questions where they're gonna start. What was the experience like? So let's get into it. So I'm gonna be real with you guys. I was very resistant, especially to Ayahuasca for many, many, many years. If you guys have been listening to my podcast, it was like something that I was like maybe one day I would sit with, but it was not something I was calling in. If anything, I was deeply afraid of it. I was afraid of losing control and I was afraid of feeling something scary, something dark. Feeling sadness. I was especially afraid that it would take me into my grandmother's fourth child marriage and that I would have to relive that, which sounded like the scariest thing ever. So I actually first sat with ayahuasca, but it was like in a different kind of ceremony. And it was like a lower dose of the ayahuasca and combination of other plants a little bit more than a year ago. And that was my first experience with her. And when I felt her energy, I'm going to say her because it has its own consciousness. You know, every plant has its own consciousness. You can talk to the consciousness of the rose, and the rose will teach you about beauty, but also boundaries of the thorn. You can speak to the consciousness of damiana, which will teach you about pleasure. You can speak to the consciousness of frankincense, which will teach you a lot about protection. So every plant has its own consciousness, including ayahuasca, which is actually combination of two different vines. So it's a vine, vine. Like if you think about the energy of the vine, it's like moving. It's kind of like snake like. So when I first experienced it last year, she appeared to me as this Thai goddess with these long Thai fingernails like this. And she was dripping gold. And she was so beautiful. And I was odd. I had so many questions for her. And she was like, if you have questions for me, you've got to sit with me by myself. And she answered like one question, but it was very vague. I could. I could feel her, but it was like far away. And I knew then I want to sit with this medicine, but in divine time for me. I'm such an empath. I'm very energy sensitive and also a channel. So my gift is I'm very open to feeling energy. And that can also be the. The shadow of. If I'm in a room with a lot of people, I'm picking up on everyone's energy, even just in this realm, let alone on plant medicine. So I knew I needed to be in a very, very small group of really all people who are like, working in spirituality, who are also channels and shamans and mystics, just because we're all very energy sensitive. And I need to personally sit with people who have done a lot of shadow work. Because again, if I'm sitting in a circle with someone and they're having their dark night of the soul, I know my energy body would start doing all this healing, healing work on them. And I wouldn't really be able to do my own inner work. So I was very specific. I wanted to be really around women where I would feel safe. I knew I wanted to do it with indigenous elders, people from the lineage unbroken. And I wanted to do it in the lands where the medicines are native and really be in right relation and also with a facilitator that I know and have built a long term relationship with and trust and have worked with outside of the medicine. So I had a lot of speculations. And I say this because everyone's journey to the medicine needs to be specific to them. And it's, it's like a mystery school, you know, it's not like I will never say everyone go to this place or everyone go sit with that person or that. That's like telling everyone, everyone, I was in a great relationship with this person. So y' all should be in a relationship with this person too. Who I might be in the best relationship with, might not be who you would be in the best relationship and vice versa. And you know, different stages of your life, it may be different people in different circles. So I also believe that are called to the medicine. It's your journey of finding the medicine that prepares you for it. So if you've never done inner work, especially deep shadow work, shadow work is going into your subconscious. It's going into your fear, your anger, your shame, your disgust, your greed, all the things you dislike about yourself, owning the parts of you that are what you don't like in the world, and sitting with the childhood traumas, ancestral traumas, past life traumas that are passed on intergenerationally and show up in patterns in our lives until we are brave enough to address them and go to the bottom of them and without any medicine. That's the spiritual journey right there. You know, to look at everything showing up in your life and really start to get curious and ask why. So after my divorce, my life really became shadow work. And for a year and a half, that was my full time focus of really going in, really questioning my beliefs, feeling all my feelings. And that's where I created my triple E method, which is, I highly recommend it for everyone. I'll even share it. I was doing this method on the medicine when I was feeling a lot of big things. So the triple E method stands for emote, Embody and express. So emote, feel your feelings, feel the rage, the sadness, the anger, the disgust. Feel where it is in your body. Cry it, grunt it, punch pillows, fall on the ground. Like whatever it is that needs to be fully expressed to its full range. Embody. Now feel where it is in your body. Does it have a color, a texture? Where is it? You can even take it out, have a conversation with it, and then start to use your body to feel what you want to feel. So if I'm feeling loneliness and that feels like this, and I want to feel held, which feels like this, I'm leaning back. How can I embody what it feels like to be held? Well, maybe I can lie down on the earth and feel that I am being held by Gaia. Maybe I can hug myself and squeeze my arms and kiss my shoulders and feel that I'm being held by myself. Maybe I can dance and just feel how I'm connected and held by life by embodying what I'm calling in. And then I express through sending a voice note to myself, to a friend, to writing a poem, writing a song. That's how my music journey began. I began producing music and writing poetry and dropped a whole album called My Body is an Altar just by doing this method on myself. You can coach someone, you can have a conversation, you can, you can create art, you can paint, you can sculpt, you can. So many forms of expression out there just to let this energy and the gifts, the siddhi, the highest form of it be felt and expressed. So this is the method I recommend for everyone. And it's something I teach at Highest Self Institute, my school. So if you're interested in our embodiment three month certification or you want to try my daily embodiment practice for free, you can head over to the show notes. So just like pause right now, head over to the show notes, get the daily embodiment practice, join the waitlist for embodiment certification. And that's a really great place to start. And honestly, like, pretty much gives you the same experience as plant medicine. But while you're here in this reality, which is actually what the real school is, because we're here as humans living on Earth, so it's not about us living in 5D all the time. If it was meant to be that way, we would be that way. We're not. We're here. And, you know, it's Earth's a little ghetto right now, but we're working on it. But we're here to bring that consciousness and that frequency. And it comes through transmutation, it comes through purification. It comes through releasing everything that we are not so we can step into who we are. Do you see yourself one day starting a podcast, writing books, speaking on stages, sharing your message with the world? 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So if you're feeling the call, come join me in Speak with Soul. I have a special 25% off discount for you listed below. So head over to the Show Notes or over to speak with soulcourse.com that speakwithsoulcourse.com to receive the 25% off right now. And you can also find that link in the Show Notes. I'm so excited to hopefully be on your podcast. Okay, so let's get started about the ceremonies. So I missed my flight on the way there and I was like, is this a sign? Am I not meant to do this? And I was like, goddess, if I'm meant to do this, please make me finding another flight easy and Harmonious. If I'm. If I'm meant to go, and if not, just block it. I'm listening. I breed butterflies. And I just had one more butterfly left. And this butterfly was, I think the world's longest living butterfly, over a month alive. This butterfly, she could never fly actually. So I was hand feeding her sugar with my little sugar tube thing and I was like, maybe God wants me to stay back with this butterfly. You know, I was open, you know, I was unattached and ended up, they, they moved my flight, no additional charge. And that extra day actually really allowed me to sit in contemplation of like, why am I doing this? What really is my intention? Because my life was super, super busy. Like especially that month before I shot two music videos for Sexy Dark Night of the Soul for Feminine is Rising. We had our embodiment launch. It was just crazy. So actually I believe I manifested missing that flight to be like, slow down, come into right relation within yourself. I got there and our first night is the ayahuasca ceremony. We sat with three members of the Huniquin tribe, which are an Amazonian tribe from Brazil, and it was actually their first time ever leaving Brazil to come to Peru. So straight out of the Amazon, dressed in their beautiful sacred garb with feathers and colors. And it was exactly the types and the person who facilitated them, she had really met with many different medicine workers, medicine men and women, and she really resonated with their frequency. And especially it was a small group of just five of us and we were all light workers, channels, mystics, shamans. So we really wanted to have people that had really clean energy so we could go deep and do our own inner work that rarely as healers you get to do because you're always holding space for other people. So, so we get in, set up our altar, I set up a gorgeous flower altar and it was time to sit with the medicine. And it just felt like, wow, here I am. And it's a process. If you've sat in ceremony before. Ceremonies take many, many hours. There's, you know, setting up the ceremonial space, clearing the space, you know, even just preparing an altar took me many hours. And this is all part of the preparation. We can't just sit ceremony, like take a little DMT pen and get to the highlight and like that's it. It's in no way the same. It's the preparation of the ceremony that makes the ceremony. It's like maybe just as important or more important than the ceremony is the preparation for it. Plus I was on A dieta. So I was not eating though. I kind of already live like that. But you can't have like sugars or. It was interesting because I was drinking coffee, but for the two weeks before, I just couldn't drink it. Like anytime I took a sip and I would make it, I just. My body rejected. So naturally the medicine was already working on me, so I rejected coffee. I was not eating red meat and I was just really like preparing my body, purifying, drinking lots of coconut water and getting myself vibrationally ready. No alcohol, but I don't drink. So there is a process actually a month at least before that you're doing. I was doing a lot of breath work, just, you know, and I was really curious because I do so much deep shadow work on myself. Any kind of healing modality possible from, you know, like past life regression to EMDR to hypno. Like anything you name, I've done and I sit with and, and not just go do, but like live my life that way. So I was just so curious of like, what am I not seeing? Like I, I literally don't even know. And there was definitely a lot. And that was the beauty of the journey, right? You're like, I think I got to the bottom of it. They're like, here's a whole other mountain for you, baby. So, you know, so we're doing the rituals, we're preparing for the ceremony and we start with hape, ceremonial sacred tobacco, which has been a huge ally for me for the past year and a half. Something I really love working with especially more last year. I don't really work with it or feel the need to work with it as much this year. But for me, the hape instructed me to imagine I was dead. And it was like, just imagine you're dead. And hape is very strong for me. It's almost like, like the levels of depth I go to are almost actually psychedelic for me. I'll go into two hour portals with it. So I just imagined myself like underneath the dirt and just like completely loosening and surrendering my body as if I, I died. And that was actually preparing me for what was to come. So drank the medicine and you know, it was in absolute silence. They're not playing any Icarus, which are their music. It was absolute silence and everyone was in silence. And an hour passes, I still don't feel anything. And I'm just thinking maybe this didn't work on me. Like maybe one cup wasn't enough. Like I don't, I don't feel anything right Now I'm kind of hearing. People are like kind of making sounds. I'm like, I feel like they must be feeling something I'm not. Then all of a sudden I hear these amazing melodies in my head. Like the most insane melodies in my voice. I'm doing like these insane top top lines on it. And it was like, oh, like things my voice could never do before, but I'm hearing in my head. I'm like, damn if I don't voice memo this song right now. I'm gonna lose it. So I really wanted to get up and get my phone and record the voice moment. The songs were getting more and more just like Grammy award winning songs there, you know, But I was like, I can't like get up and get my phone to record a voice memo right now. It's gonna like disturb the people. But they kept coming and they kept coming. And then I could feel like I started kind of entering into this different realm. And it showed me like the inside of a train and you know, like the of a train. It's like, it's like a conductor. Like it, it. Everything is interconnected. It's like these different shapes. Like there's like that spiral thing and that's connected to this long thing that moves back and forth like this and that's connected to something else. And it's like all part, it's like mechanics, like all parts of it are interconnected. And it showed me how one person triggers a dark night of the soul and you. And that creates your awakening to lead to you becoming who you're meant to become. And you will trigger a dark night of the soul in someone else. And that was also meant to be the awakening of who they're meant to become next. And it's really all beyond us and actually coming from somewhere way higher than us. The way that we trigger and trickle with each other is in a divine perfect math. So I'm seeing the cause and effect of everything in the universe. Someone says one thing to you, the way it affects you and the way it affects them and just how divinely timed and perfect it all is. And then they start playing the Icarus and I'm seeing this force field that they are actually creating over us with beautiful sacred geometry. And it is like a math. And they could see, and I could now see the realm of where there were like little holes in it. And they would like play the music and the frequency to go into that hole and like really create this beautiful protective force field for us. So I'm seeing the ways that all of our energies are swirling in this space that we're creating. And the music in my mind is getting more and more like insanely beautiful. But it starts to tell me these uncomfortable truths about myself through music and rap. And it was like the most insane thing. So it freestyle rapped and sang to me for the next five, six hours, which is so interesting because everyone's experience is so different. And it's like both my consciousness and the medicine together knew the way that it would like resonate with me the most was to make it like literally into a hip hopper. So it was like, and it was funny, like it was like it would tell me the most uncomfortable truth about myself. But I would start laughing because I was like, damn, like you are right. And she had this like black mama energy to her. And my great grandmother was Ethiopian. It really had her frequency to it and loving, but humbling, humbling and just telling me. And really the big theme of that medicine journey for me was about loving my 11 year old girl. And 11 years old was the year for me where I felt the fattest, the ugliest, the most awkward, the most unloved. It was a year where my parents were fighting a lot and also a year where I had a huge crush on this boy and he never liked me back. And it was this like unrequited love. And the reason why I felt, felt like he didn't like me back was because I was too fat and ugly and hairy and middle Eastern and you know, all of the things. And she really showed me that the only way you can really have someone love you fully, the love that you are desiring is for you to love that 11 year old girl. But if you're constantly telling that 11 year old girl, you know, subconsciously, oh, oh, you gotta lose weight, oh you need to wax, oh, you need to wear makeup, oh, you need to wear this dress like that, be like this, be like that. It's telling her that she's not loved as she is. And I was going through a conflict with my mom at the time because she comes from Iran and doesn't love the way that I present myself online sometimes, especially in my music videos and just comes from another culture in another time. And it was really challenging for me cause I love my mom so much. We were like besties growing up. And it's like I really want her to like side with me and love everything that I'm doing and like be my most supportive ally. And it's been this hard thing of I'm stepping Into this new version of myself where I feel more liberated and free and expressed. But then to have her voice like with her more old school beliefs on if you dress like that, people will think you'll never get married. That kind of thing. I'm like, it's not really the only goal in my life here, but okay, also been there, done that. It's not really all what it's been out to be, you know, but anyways it. So I was in this hard time with my mom of like, why doesn't she understand me? Why isn't she supportive of me? Like I'm being my full expression and, and she wants me to be this like prim little like country club like Persian sweet wife with like no voice. And that's not who I am. And why can't she love me for who I am? And it was this really hard thing. But the medicine also really showed me. Do you know who loved that 11 year old girl who thought the world of her, who dedicated her life to that girl? Your mother. And as much as you might not be seeing eye to eye right now, the love that you are desiring, that love that you are craving, that unconditional love is only the love of a mother. And that really humbled me because when we surround ourselves by other people our age all the time, it's like your mom's not like okay with like you showing up as yourself online. Like you gotta cut her out. Like that doesn't make any sense. Like she needs to learn and that's the advice we give each other. And it's like, and that's on our consciousness here as people in our 30s, you know, or in your 20s or wherever you are. But Ayahuasca is a grandmother and she really zoomed me out and so many things. But on this of like, don't let these little grievances with your mom hold you back from loving the person that loved you more than anyone your entire life. And just showed me the beauty and the gift, especially of a mother daughter relationship. Because as women we can really only understand other women to the, to the depth that we're desiring when we want someone to be emotionally there for us to hold us in our fullness. That's woman to woman, the way that we can connect in a way that we can connect with men in a different way, but it's not in the same way that women and women can. And it really showed me that when we die and we're on our deathbed, it's our daughter's hands that we are holding. And it showed me my grandmother. And when she passed away a few years ago, she was holding her daughter's hand. And one day it will be me holding my mother's hand. And these grievances that we hold onto so much of, why won't you accept me? Why don't you? It's like these things are all a human construct, right? I need to be heard. I need to be accepted. I need to be understood. It's like, on a deep soul level, even if your mom doesn't approve of what you're doing, on the human, she loves you. On a soul level, you are her. And until we can really receive the love of a mother, we can never receive the love of a partner. Because the love of the mother is the truest, most eternal love. The mother is literally life giving life back to life itself. The mother is the mountain from which the children are born from. The children only know her as nourishment. She is God. She is the sustenance of life. As a mother, you are God. Your mother was your God. Your mother was the. The milk that you drink from the womb that you were created from. The first person who you wanted to hold and hug her when you were scared was your mother. And yes, her human side may not see everything, not have the best tools and the best communication, and be in her fear body or in her scarcity or in her wounding. And her trauma in life takes a toll on us all. But your mother loves you more than you can understand what love is, even if she can't say it, even if you're not in communication. And then until you have children, you will never understand the love that your mother has for you. And that was the biggest message I received from Ayahuasca. And it just humbled me so deeply. And after that, I just, you know, sent a voice note to my mom, and I was just moved in tears. And I'm just like, let's just put this behind us. Like, I will be the one holding your hand on your deathbed. Like, know that I will never leave you and I will never abandon you. And so many of our mothers are so scared of that. So many of our mothers feel like they got the short end of the stick of being there for their mom so much. But then who's there for them? And a lot of our mothers, they see us and we live our own lives and we leave, and they're happy for us, but they're also like, who is going to be there for me when I'm old? And our American culture has made us so hyper focused on getting ahead and productivity and individualism. And our relationships are actually the most important parts of our lives. And that really brought me into the main message of Huachuma, San Pedro. So San Pedro is a cactus, a straight up fierce cactus. And it's really known for restoring right relations. It's like family constellations work. It's very connected to our ancestry. It's considered grandfather medicine. So I did not know what to expect. I have had very significant people in my life sit with the medicine of Wachuma and it really bring out a lot in them, which has massively impacted my life as well. So I've always held Wachuma in very deep, deep, deep reverence and been extremely grateful for it being the truth serum that it is. And also like, damn, like I've seen people's lives and same with ayahuasca, like, their lives entirely change. Like who they are entirely change. And I had no idea what I would see, learn, become, feel, experience. But I surrendered and I said, whatever it is, what is ever is in the highest good. And specifically for me, anything that is holding me back from love. And that was my intention for this entire week. Anything that is holding me back from experiencing true love in this lifetime, I'm willing to see it, face it, and experience it. The ayahuasca showed me my inner child and the ways that I had a severed relationship with my mother all restored that night. Another important message the ayahuasca shared with me me that I will be implementing and have already started implementing on social media, is to go days without wearing makeup. Especially here on the podcast and on social media. I just got back from two weeks from Peru, which might I say, were probably the most life changing weeks of my life and the biggest thing I took away from it are the power of plants. Plants have their own consciousness. They are are working with us and we can create anything we desire in our lives with the allies of plants. And I'm not just talking about plant medicine, but everyday herbs. But we have to have organic, wild, crafted and sustainably harvested plants and herbs to reap the most benefits. And this is why I love Anima Mundi Herbals. So it's founded by Costa Rican herbalists and a personal friend of mine who's been on the podcast, Adriana Ayala. They're made in an FDA and SGMP certified facility, all organic, well crafted, sustainably harvested with zero binders, fillers or flow agents. My personal favorite that I actually brought to Peru with me are the rose, which is literally organic rose petals, grind it up. So I love adding it to teas, smoothies, like anything. I've been really working with the energy of the rose, which is all about the divine feminine mucuna, which is a dopamine bean that increases happiness in your brain, and their cerebral tonic, which really helps with cognition. So I highly recommend giving them a try. And they have given podcast listeners an exclusive 15 off. So head over to animamundiherbals.com and use coupon code Sahara for 15 off. That's anima a n I M a M u N D I herbal goals.com with coupon code Sahara. And you can find that link in code in the show notes. So trust your intuition, trust your inner wisdom, trust you in the guidance. You know, after my divorce, I, you know, was moving through a lot of grief and sadness and tears. It was a sudden divorce and based on his infidelity and really just rocked me to my core. And something that helped me get through it was to, you know, even though I, like, felt so bad, I'm like, I'm just gonna look amazing. I'm gonna put on a cute outfit. I'm gonna, like, do my hair. I'm going to go to a dance class. I'm going to, like, you know, do these things to boost my mood. And it really helped. And the podcasts of last year were really about that energy of stepping into your main character energy, being your dream girl. And, you know, all of a sudden, I'm. I'm traveling and I'm DJing, and I'm falling in love with myself and my beauty and my radiance, especially in ways that I could not show up before in that marriage. And that was a huge part of my healing journey. And everything has cycles and seasons, and it showed me the next phase of my journey is just coming back to earth, coming back to nature. And so the first thing that she told me was just don't wear first of all filters. Sometimes I would do Instagram stories and, you know, when you don't have makeup on, you use the filters, the beauty filters that soften your skin. She was like, that is literally putting an AI version of you out into the world. It's not even what you look like. So, so immediately, no more filters. And I go on my Instagram stories the next day, you know, hair messy in the braids post. Ayah. I shared on my Instagram stories that we need more realness on social media, we need more realness in the world, and we are covering Ourselves with filters, with makeup, with all these masks that people cannot see who we truly are. And so I am committing to showing eyes up with no makeup on and no beauty filters on and showing you my real, true, God given face. And the response I received from that was so incredible because, you know, when one woman does it, it gives other women that permission slip and the ripple effect is so real. So since then, most of my social media posts that you see, I've been writing a lot of poetry in Peru and I would just record poems or go on hikes and have downloads. No makeup, no hair. Like right now, you can see I got, I put some braids in my hair to spice it up, but it's my, you know, more wild woman hair. I do have a little bit of makeup on, but my solo cast, the next one I'm gonna do, I'm just gonna wear zero makeup on. And that is my stand that I'm listening to. The medicine will do solo casts with no makeup on as well. Because I believe it's important for us to find beauty in both. We can find beauty in dressing ourselves like goddesses and doing our hair and makeup and the ritual and the adornment of that. And that's a healing part of her journey. But then if we're afraid of showing our face with no makeup on, no filters on, which a lot of us, myself including, fell into that trap of, well, now people think I'm always like this. So if I'm not like this, then what? Then people are gonna think I'm ugly. The comparison of me with the filter or without the filter is so drastic or you think in your head is so drastic. So I can't now. And so many people I've seen on social media have never, I've never even seen what they look like without a filter on, let alone makeup up. So I'm committed. And I have been for the past few weeks sharing with no makeup on, wild woman, messy hair. And my invitation is for more women to join me, for more of us to share what our true selves look like. Because what are we doing this for? Like, if all we're doing is putting on makeup to attract a man and we attract him, but it's when we had, had, you know, all this foundation on and eyelash extensions and lip fillers and Botox and, you know, all of the things that we often do, let's say you attract a man who resonates with that. Well, now you have to keep it up. Or so you think, you know, and he never got to see your real beauty. And also just it showed me, it's like. And I've never gone that route of doing like the, the fillers and all of that, but she showed me, you know, some prominent people in our celebrity consciousness. And one of them, I'll mention, Kim Kardashian. And it's like, look at the vibration of men and relationship that she has attracted, you know, men that only want for her, for her beauty, men that do see her like a Barbie. And I mean, the Aya did this all to me in a song. And I can really remember this song. And it was like, Kim Kardashian, she's got, she's got the perfect face and the perfect ass and the perfect waist and the perfect house and the perfect, perfect friends. But guess what? She doesn't have one thing. What's that? She doesn't have one thing. Say more. She doesn't have one thing. Let's hear it now. She doesn't have love. She doesn't have love she doesn't have love but her life's so perfect. She's a Barbie but one thing's missing. Oh, it's love. And it was like this full song. And again, I think she's just an icon in my consciousness. I've never met her. I'm not, I'm not saying. But what she represents in our collective consciousness is this culture. It is this culture of, well, I'm just going to get more beautiful and more perfect. Like even on their show, they are using beauty filters on the show, on top of professional hair and makeup and all of that. And it's. And then all the plastic surgery. Like, apparently she has like a 19 inch waist, which I don't even know what that means. But think about the number of times she's gotten liposuction to get herself to that. That your waist, your stomach, your womb stores your organs, your livelihood, your liver, your kidney, your colons. Again, your womb. It's what creates life. Why must we pretend that we do not have wombs to be loved when the womb is love? The womb is where we all came from. But we're like supposed to pretend we don't have them. Like, do you see how this is erasing ourselves, that in our femininity we're told that that is what it is to be feminine when it's actually the most masculine consciousness of all. This consciousness of perfection, this consciousness of nip tuck and it needs to look perfect all the time. It's very distorted masculine consciousness. And we women, we are buying into it because we think or are told that that's the only way that we will experience love. If we're thin enough, clear enough, skin big enough, small enough, waist, big enough, lips, lips, long enough, eyelashes, smooth enough skin, all of the things. If you're not one of those things, oh, that's, that's why, that's why you're single. Oh, that's why he left you. Oh, that's why he cheated on you. Oh, that's why he's not interested having sex with you. It's because of you. It's because you're not perfect enough. Don't you see you're five pounds too fat? Don't you see your hair's too frizzy? Don't you see your skin's not clear enough? Don't you see? You need to fix that? How are you going to keep him engaged? That's what the culture is trying to tell us. And not our culture, but the mainstream culture. And I feel that these figures such as the Kardashian culture are really propagating that. And I think it's especially harmful when they pretend that they've never done plastic surgery and are pretending and just lying to us and saying, oh, I don't know, I just, it's just my face, face just shifted. I don't know, just a little bit of fillers and it's just not true. I think, do whatever you want to do, but be honest about it at least. And for me, and again, I can only speak to my own personal experience and something I really gained from this is for us to really attract true love, we need to let our true selves be seen. If we want a relationship, we need to be real. Because if we present ourselves like a Barbie, you're going to be attracted to a man that wants a Barbie. And guess what? You play with Barbie a little bit, toss her aside, she's not that important. And guess what? Barbie finds Ken and they both play these little roles out. Oh, you look like the beautiful thin Pilates wife. Oh, great. You look like the 6 foot 5, blue eyes, finance with a six pack neck. Let's play this role together. Oh, you're plastic. I'm plastic too. I never really liked you. I'm gonna have an affair with the trainer. I'm gonna have an affair with your best friend. Is that really what we're trying to play out here? That plot line's getting a little boring and I don't think we want that, you know, and we feel, well, if I just get better and if I just get better. I'm gonna try this better relationship. It's not about getting better. It's about getting realer. Because if you think it's better, you're just going to attract someone that just wants better. And then they'll want better and better and better and better. And you'll never feel like you're enough because they never feel like they're enough, because someone that just keeps wanting better doesn't feel like they're enough as they are. But when you can love yourself at your realness, at your fullness, at your wrinkles and your. Your frizz and your. Your armpit hair and your whatever the thing is, and you get to decide what that is for you, you will attract and be in calibration with someone who's accepted that. And I feel so many of us, we feel alone in our relationships because we put on this facade. You know, we put on this facade at the beginning to win him over. I'm going to only show the parts of me that I feel that you will like. So I'm going to be. Be your dream girl. I'm gonna read you and understand everything you said and what I think that you like about women. I'm gonna be that. So I can seal the deal, get you to propose, get the ring, and then walk down the aisle. I'm in the house. I'm good. I'm set for life now. Oh, I'm actually a witch. Oh, now actually we're free. Bleeding with the new moon. Oh, actually, now I'm going to Peru and sitting with Iwa. And he's like, what? This is not who I married. And she's like, yeah, yeah, this is actually who I was underneath it. I just did the little Pilates housewife country club game so I would get the ring. Now I'm gonna sell it for herbs. He's like, I'm not signed up for this. Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight. Divorce. Dark night of the soul. But make it sexy. So we. We can play out that timeline, or we can, if you're single, just start being more of yourself. Start being your full expression. Because you want a relationship where you feel seen, where you feel heard, where you feel met, where you feel understood. That's really sexy. But how are you going to get that when you're not seeing, hearing, or understanding yourself, when you don't even know who you are, when you have covered yourself in masks, when you can't even make eye contact with yourself in the mirror unless you're wearing makeup? Can you stare at the part of your body that you hate the most until you love it. Every single day. My practice last year, every single day because I for 15 years of my life would wake up and look at my stomach and be like, you're so fat. I'd have a good day if my stomach was flat, a bad day if my stomach was bloated. And I started that maybe when I was 11 years old till like my mid-20s obsession with my stomach because I grew up in the Britney Spears midriff era where you had to do a thousand sit ups a day apparently to look like Britney me. And that's just like not how my body is designed. Like I just naturally store fat on my body and I have curves and I'm, I'm a woman. We have that especially on our, on our womb spaces because it keeps our wombs safe and healthy. So what I would do is I would just look in the mirror and I would just rub my lower belly and love on her and touch her and sometimes it'd be confronting. Like I would like want to wear something like high waisted so I wouldn't to have, have to like see my whole stomach. Do you know what I mean? You like try to hide your lower pooch from yourself. And I'd be like pull down, really look at the lower pooch. Love the lower pooch. And it's an ongoing practice for me, you know, because I'll still sometimes find in my mind when like my stomach looks like more flat and I'm like happier with myself and I'm like, are we back on the Britney programming that we see that that did not serve her or anyone in the Mickey Mouse club. So we don't want to do that. But it's so, it's so ingrained in us. It's so ingrained in, trained in us. So I find myself like deliberately practicing looking my belly in the mirror and loving her. For some women it's their thighs. For some woman it's their arms. For some woman it's their breasts. For some woman it's their butt, their face, their skin, whatever that thing is that you're insecure about, putting that at the altar of your life and loving her more than anything and finding things that you can love about her. Now, Now I think chubby bellies are cute. I'm into the Venusian goddess look like you know those like Renaissance paintings where she's like lying on the couch with like one titty out like rope straight everywhere and she's just like eating some fucking grapes. She's got rolls Sexy. That's what I'm calling in. And if my man doesn't like that, it's not gonna work, because I want a man that loves a real, feminine, natural woman, because that's. That's who I am. But if I, you know, get myself to get down to, like, 18, body fat and ripped and all the things, and I attract a man who's attracted to that, now I'm stuck in that matrix, you know? So really, the medicine was showing me, be your real self. Because I do believe we have soul contracts with people, people who are meant to do this dance with soulmates in our lives, partners. But they can't find you if you're covered in makeup, if you're dressed a certain way, if you have filters, you won't be able to feel your soul. And for me, it really made me clear of, like, the man that I'm calling in is a man of an earth. Of the earth. Like, every time I've done any kind of psychedelic, when I. Starting when I was 23 years old with mushrooms, when I look at my face in the mirror, I see this Amazonian woman. Like, that is my highest self. That is my soul self. And other people on psychedelics see that in me too. And I always have these long braids, like, down to here with, like, tribal paint on. And I'm like this Amazonian chief. And that really is my energy. Like, I have a very strong leadership energy. Since I was a child, I'm a leader, but really coming from a place of feminine leadership. And I saw in the. In the ceremony, I transformed into her, and I was in a tribe and the drummers all around me and using music to heal, but also my word and my poetry. And it really reminded me, my dharma is to is a poet. Like, that is who I am. These podcasts are like poetry. I'm just channeling here for you. My music is my poetry. My teachings are my poetry. I'm here to take the intangible of life and transmute it into beautiful words so they can permeate into your consciousness and you can have the experience that you're here to have with it. That is my gift. This is my. This is my dharma. Is. Is this spoken word. And it really reminded me of that and also allowed me to see my highest self. And when you see that, you're like, why would I ever try to cover myself up or look like something else or follow these trends when I am so uniquely designed? And we all have that, and you don't need plant Medicine to discover that. Just sit in stillness. You know, since coming back, I have sat in so much stillness. I just crave it. Like, I took an Uber the other day. It was an hour drive. I just down sat. Sat in silence in that car. Used to never do that. I used to always felt like I needed music on or something, do something on my phone. I just sat there, I looked out the window and it was beautiful. And I just witnessed my mind and how it moves and the thoughts I was having and the circles I would go in. I just was like, wow. So fascinating. This mind is an incredible one, you know, and maybe I'll do a whole other podcast, because the Wachumas were like totally different journeys. So let's just keep this one on, on, on the Aya medicine. But it really showed me that the mind is so powerful and it can. It can solve so many problems, but the real problems it's seeking to solve, it never can because there's no solution. You know, how am I going to find true love? Well, here's how. You know, it's not quite how it works. Give me a math equation. My mind can solve that, that. But eternal happiness. I'm pretty sure the actual thing that's holding you back from that is the thing trying to solve that problem. So we'll get into the nature of the mind, because that was really a huge part of the Wachuma. So I really want to focus this one on our own inner relationships with ourselves. And there are so many ways that we can come back to our inner medicine woman, our inner, you know, priestess, our inner wisdom keeper, connecting back to earth, spending more time in nature. So something I'm deeply committed to doing every weekend now is going out hiking. I live in Southern California where there are mountains. I'm so blessed. If you don't live in a place with mountains, what is the nature near you? Can you go to the beach? Can you go to the river? Can you go to the forest? Maybe you have to drive a little bit to get there. But going to untouched places of nature and just walk, and no phone, no nothing, just walking in silence and hearing the sounds of the nature is the most psychedelic experience you can have. And I guarantee you just by doing that, if you commit to doing that, going by yourself, not with a friend where you're talking the whole time, if you go with a friend, both commit to being in silence together. Maybe you walk a little bit five feet apart, too, so you're in your own experience. So when we were with the Wachuma, we were hiking 12 hours a day, day. It was very powerful. And with ayahuasca, you could not hike because it's very inner. But with the Wachuma, it's. It's more like you're. You're really just like, here in this reality, but with, like, way deeper thoughts. So being in nature is the best way. I believe that we can all begin this, you know, and then using more herbs in our lives. Herbal teas and blends. There are so many beautiful ones out there that we can start working with, working with plant allies. We were really working with the medicine of the rose, the medicine of beauty, of. Of the sacred feminine. And it's so funny because my friend who was. Who was facilitating, she was on a rose dieta. So for like, many weeks, she was in silence and on a very, very strict diet that when you're on a dieta, you're not having anything with, like, salt. You're only eating, like, rice and like, beans, pretty much with no salt. It's extremely strict. And you're ingesting this plant several times a day, and you're not in contact with anyone for several weeks. She was just working with the rose. And when I saw her on the medicine, she was a rose priestess. Like, she was like Mother Mary and Mary Magdalene put together with like, this whole rose garb. She had, like, become the rose. So it shows that these herbs that we work with, they do become part of our consciousness. So the herb that most of us. It's not even really an herb, it's more of bean that our society works with is coffee, you know, so we all have this, like, coffee consciousness. And what's coffee consciousness? It's productivity. Let's get things done. It's move fast. I think it's a helpful medicine, but like everything, it's a medicine. Are you calling in more of that? If you're more kapha energy, more of that earth dosha, which are the Ayurvedic archetypes. If you're interested in that, I'll link. I've written two Ayurveda books all about healing yourself through using the elements. So if you're someone that's like sluggish, you struggle with lethargy, you have a hard time getting up, coughing. Coffee is a great medicine for you. You want more of that in your auric field. However, if you are someone that's anxious, someone that can't sit still, someone that's like, always needing to do something, always on to the next and the only plant you're working with Is coffee, then that's actually giving you more of what you don't want. So maybe you want to do something that's like more of a root, you know, bringing you back to earth. So we can work with plants in many, many, many different ways. And also just working with our subconscious conscious questioning our beliefs, going through the method, emote, embody, express the triple E method, doing the daily embodiment practice. I'll share my free one below. These are all ways that, you know, the work of the medicine is really how we integrate it. And one thing I'm so proud of for myself is like, I feel very humble in the way that I receive things. So everything that the medicine showed me instantly, the next day, no ego. I'm like, let's it do, do it. You want me to share without makeup? Let's do it. Restore right relations with every member of my family. Let's go in and. And that's the beauty of. And that's where we can get the most of it. You know, whereas I feel a lot of people go into medicine, they're like, well, I didn't feel anything, or I didn't experience anything, or they experience something, but their lives don't change. It's not a quick fix. You know, the medicine can show you things, but it's up to you what you're going to do about it. It's not going to change you or make you do it. It just shows you things. And also some people have really, really strong egos that it's like the medicine doesn' even get through. And also, the medicine knows what you're ready for. If you are not ready to dive deep, it won't dive you deep. A lot of people sit with the medicine and they have no experience at all because the medicine knows they're either not ready for it or it's not for them. You know, the medicine path is also not for everyone. You know, it's something that you need to feel drawn to. You need to feel a curiosity for. You want to study. You want to sit with indigenous elders. You want to really learn how to be a student of this. That is really who it's for. And like everything, it's seasons. There may be a season of your life that you're working deeper with medicine and seasons of your life that God is asking you to really stay here in this human plane. And this is the plane for you. You can also have, you know, similar experiences through meditation and breath work. If that feels more comfortable and safe for you, then that's your path. But if there's something that's interested within you, I would say follow it. Begin to get curious and follow the breadcrumbs. Crumbs. For me, I would say it has been the most impactful thing I have ever done in my spiritual path. However, I have done 10 plus years of deep, devoted daily spiritual practice to even be at a place to, to really open up. Surrender zero fear medicine, show me whatever you need. I could not have done that before this moment fully. And that's why it was so impactful for me. And also that I integrate these things into my life. So it's also really about divine Tim. Had I done it right after my divorce, I think it would have been too much because after a big like breakup or something traumatic, it's like our lives are kind of like ayahuasca ceremonies where there's so much happening. So I would say really wait for a time that you feel stable in your life. So if you're like in between homes and you're not sure what's going to happen next, you're going through a really hard time. That's not the time to go to the medicine because you're in fear already and it can just bring that further up. But when you're in a place that you're like, I've done a lot of work, work. I've sat with myself. I know my shadows, I know who I am. And I honestly at this point feel like I've gone as far as I can for now. There's, you know, that there's always more, deeper, but I'm just ready for that next level. That's really the time to do it. And I'm so grateful because it took me places I could have never imagined. And that's just the first ceremony. We haven't even gotten to the second and third. So I'll do follow up podcasts on that. It really shifted my. In entire life, my entire view on my life and who I am and what I see for myself and what I'm desiring, what I'm calling in, how I deci, how I want to show up in the world, how I communicate, the people I want in my life, the kind of relationships I want, how I show up in those relationships, every single thing for me and to become and not like a drastic shift like I used to be this. Now I'm that. That. It's like a higher octave, a higher, like, I love my friends. Let's go even deeper. You know, it really showed me, like, who's there for Me, when the lights and cameras come off and I take the makeup off, those are the people I want to deepen with, you know, And. And for me, in relationship, I deeply desire to be in relationship with someone who's also on a deep spiritual path, hopefully a medicine path as well, because it has been extremely profound for my life. Whereas before this, I mean, you guys hear me talk on the podcast, like, I never went for, like, spiritual guys, and I still don't think I'm gonna, like, find a guy at the ecstatic dance, so you never know. But I just feel like I just had this maybe, like, belief before of, like, oh, well, like, men just aren't as spiritual as women, and so it's fine. And, like, I can teach him, you know, and that belief has gotten me into relationships with men who are not who. They have beautiful souls. They just weren't on their spiritual journeys, and then I brought them along, and then their shadows come, and the relationship can no longer continue. So let's not repeat that pattern, honey. And instead, I deeply desire to be with my spiritual equal, you know, like someone who's on my level of consciousness, who I can have these deep levels of conversation with, who I'm, you know, calling in one day, have him on the podcast, and we can share his personal journey to getting to this place, his dark nights of the soul, the medicine work that he has done, and the fears and limiting beliefs and things that have held him back on his past and how he found his way on the other side. And so am I. And in divine timing, when we're ready, it's like, when you're ready, there's no way you cannot meet. But if you're not ready, you can't meet. It really showed me that of, like, the perfection and timing, you know, that, like, trust that if you're single, like, trust that your person is out there learning the exact lessons that they need to be ready to hold their relationship with you. And same with you. And I find the more that we dive into doing this deep inner healing, excavating work without any egoic, like, oh, I don't want to do this, or, I don't want to suffer, and this isn't fun. And, you know, there's different stages. Like, when I first became single, like, I was like, I'm gonna have a hot girl summer. And I needed to experience that. Like, experience traveling in Europe all summer and DJing and wearing really cute outfits. And that's what I needed because I was. Was in a marriage and within a relationship, I was 24 years old. So my whole 20s, you know, I was, like, working, married, you know, doing that. So I was like, I don't even know what it's like to be single. Even though I was 32. And then, you know, after one, not even a summer of that, like, a month of that, I was like, okay, this has been real. I definitely hate alcohol. Yeah. I remember why I stopped drinking. I was 21, you know, just like. And it was just not my vibe, you know, and the journey went. Went on and trying different archetypes and aspects within myself. And now I'm just in this time where I'm like, I love. Like, just, like, being in my nest, being with my friends. A huge takeaway. I'll just share this one. This happened later on in the week. But it really showed me the ways that I was suppressing my own nurturing energy because of, you know, this relationship with my mom. But the way that I was viewing the mother, Mother. Like, I had always seen mothers have to sacrifice themselves for their children and that they never, especially women in my Middle Eastern family, got to do what they want, got to have freedom, got to travel, got to live their dharmas because they became mothers very young and, you know, gave their lives to their children. So there was a subconscious programming in me that to be a mother is to give up your whole life. So why would I want to be a mother then? It's funny, because I always wanted to be a mom, but it was only until in my marriage that I was like, I don't really even know if I want this. Like, I don't know, kids. Feels like such a liability. Like, so much can go wrong. Like, you don't sleep. Like the world's crazy. Like, all of the fears, which are legitimate, you know, concerns. And I'll save this for later, but it really shifted my views on that. But the one takeaway that I will share with you right now, now, is the medicine showed me, like, how much I love my dog Chai. Chai, who's right here. Come here, Chai. Chai, come here. And here he is. Little buttercup. You're so sweet. I love you so much. Oh, precious teddy bear. Don't we look alike? That's why I dyed my hair so people think I'm his natural birth mom for real. But it just showed me, like, the love that I have for this precious little Animal who's turning 8 years old this summer. He's a little Leo, and I've had him, you know, my longest relationship now. And he's Been with me so many seasons and journeys, and, like, he's a thing that lights me up more than anything and really brings out my nurturing side. And I just, like, obsess over him all day. And so it was actually in the Temescal that I've been sitting with this question about getting a second dog for a while, but I was always like, I don't know. Like, you know, let's. I'm gonna be real. I'm like, I'm single. It's gonna be too much work. I have to wait till I have a boyfriend. That was the thing. I was like, I need to have someone else to help me because. Because it's going to be too hard with two dogs. And so I didn't do it. And. But I've been craving that, like, baby puppy energy in my life. And in the Temescal, I'm like, when is the right time for me to get the second dog? Because I could feel her soul coming in, and they're like, the time is now. So Chai's gonna have a little sister who's coming next Friday. By the time this episode comes out, she will be here. I'm naming her Marshmallow, AKA Marshy. And she's from the same breeder that Chai. Chai is from, and the same breed. Breed. So I'm hoping that they are, like, cousins of some sort. I'm really hoping that they weren't sure. But it showed me that I deeply connect to my nurturing energy when I'm with this little pup and when I'm breeding my butterflies and, you know, when I'm making food and all these different things and to just, like, reconnect with that side of myself more. Because I feel like as women in this day and age, we, you know, are so focused on our careers and our businesses and doing things, and that's so important. But it showed me I, like, really mastered that. And it's time. Time for me to, like, go into my nurturing side. And I feel like so many of us women were waiting for a man to bring us into that nurturing side. Like, oh, I'll be nurturing and soft when I have a man paying my bills. You know, he. He will have to, like, soften me, as if it's, like, someone else's job to do that or it's even possible for someone else to change your perception of yourself, and it's all an inside job. You know, if you want to experience romance, romanticize your own life. You want to experience love, be your Own best lover. You want to experience softness. Allow yourself to soften and then you will magnetize what you are. So for me, this is going to be a soft girl summer. I'm going to go hiking. It also told me to spend more time at the petting zoo. So I will be brushing some alpacas and with my two pups and rolling around in nature and, and, you know, brewing herbs and, you know, being with my sisters and creating ceremony and talking to trees and healing my womb. I'm going to Guatemala. I'll be studying Mayan womb healing with an elder there. I'm very excited for that. And working with more flowers and plants and sitting with medicine and just, yeah, like, reconnecting with our natural ways as the wild woman and medicine woman and mystics that we are. Lots of more music, lots of more poetry. That is something that is so true and deep to my soul and just more spoken word poetry as well. I've been sharing on my Instagram, but I write a poem almost every day. I just don't share it. And so I will be sharing more of that side of me as well. I'm sure you can feel the difference in my frequency. I'm still. I'm still me, but it's just brought me, you know, really back into my roots and deeper into my womanhood. I really feel this evolution and this chapter has closed of, you know, I'm still a maiden because I don't. I don't have a child, but that maiden, more energy in me has sort of shifted and evolved into more just womanhood, you know, from girlhood to womanhood and really seeing myself as the grandmother. And I actually met myself, my future self as a grandmother one day. And it was so words can't describe just the beauty and the profoundness and the love that I felt and what a gift it is to be able to be life, bring life, share life. That is really what the spiritual journey is all about. It's life giving life back to life itself. So I hope you enjoyed this. Another little piece that the Wachuma shared with me is like, she was like, well, the Wachum is more of masculine, so he's like, do more solo casts. They're like, your solo casts are where you shine. It's where you can share your wisdom and just channel and it's where your ideas and thoughts come through and you're able to share messages, messages that resonate with other people. So something I will be doing more of on the podcast is now every other week will be a solo Cast. And I asked on my Instagram, I was like, let me see if the people actually want this. I was like, how do you guys want the podcast to be? Do you want it to be how it is now? 75% interview, 25% solos. Do you want 50, 50 solos interviews, or would you prefer 75% solos, 25 interviews? Most of you were at 50, 50, or 75% solo, 10 cast. I love you. You're so sweet. And I love doing solo casts. Like, I have so much fun. Like, I hope you know I'm having the best time ever. Like, we're hanging out and, like, we're friends. It's so fun for me because I just feel like I get to, like, shoot the shit, like, talk to a friend and just, like, keep it real. So share with me what you would like more solo casts about. And it would be super, super helpful if you shared it in the little podcast app place. So, you know, when you got your iPhone, you look up podcasts. You know, there's a podcast app app, and it's a really easy way to listen to the podcast. By the way, it's also on Spotify and I'm also on video, if you didn't know that. I wear really cute outfits. So it's on YouTube as well. But as a free gift for leaving a review for it in the podcast apps, you scroll to the bottom, hit review, share with me what you would like solo casts about. So now. So now I'm gonna be doing more of them. So share with me what topics you'd like me to go into, questions you have, keywords, we can just vibe on the them. I'm really open. I love sharing the space with you. It's so much fun for me. So share with me in your review. Share with me what you love about the podcast, you know, any experiences, insights you've had. I'd love to read. I read every single one every week and take a screenshot of it and send it to me and I will send you my womb meditation. So this is a meditation to connect your sacred womb space and receive her answers and ask your womb questions. Because we often go outside of ourselves asking about this, asking about that, when our womb knows the way. So it's a free gift for leaving a review. So all you gotta do is leave a review on the podcast app, take a screenshot of that review and email it over to me@saharaiamsaharose.com you can find that email and any links mentioned, like, my daily embodiment practice in the show notes. All right. Thank you so much for tuning in, for listening, for holding a safe, energetic space for me to share something that was really, really deeply personal and profound in my life. I know, like, we're a certain group of people that listen to this, so I, like, share things I don't share on Instagram here. So I'm really grateful for you to be here, for you to listen to the end of this episode of just my voice talking for so long. Like, love you. Like, wow. And I'll see you next week for the next episode. All right. Have a good one. Trust your intuition, Trust your inner wisdom? Trust your inner guidance. So trust your intuition, Trust your inner wisdom? Trust your inner guidance.