Building An Army to Overcome Oppression!

I actually have a full week of events this week. I have an event every single day. So I'm doing these videos ahead of time to make sure they go out to you. So if you notice I'm wearing the same outfit, that would be why I don't normally do this, but I wanted to make sure these go out to you and that I have the time to put quality videos out there. Today we talk about oppression. But Indigenous people may be victimized, maybe marginalized, may be oppressed, but we are not victims. Because believing we are, that identity is enough to crush us. Today I want to talk about how to overcome oppression. If you belong to a marginalized group, of course I'm going to do it from an Indigenous lens. But I believe it could help anyone in that circumstance. So let's talk about it. Hi everybody. My name is Sandy Bouget. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the Loon clan, a proud member of Seine River First Nation in Treaty 3 Territory in Northern Ontario. And as I mentioned in the opening, I really want to talk about what it's like to be an oppressed person and how to get past this, the bs, how to get past the fact that it feels like every single person on the planet is looking down on you except for your own and your own is telling you why keep trying. And that's the reality of oppression. The internalized oppression, the violence, the acquiescence or the non violent resistance. Today I'm talking about non violent resistance because I would not have the life I have now if I had not found a way past the insanity. One of the problems I see, it's all about identifying problems lately or I guess one of the reasons. I have worked with Indigenous peoples my entire career. I've seen the effects of the oppression, I've seen the ongoing oppression and I've seen so many activists dedicate their life to changing what Canada is doing to us. Getting Canada to change its policy, trying to get Canada to stop the oppression. And yeah, we got some wins, but really not changing a lot. And I think I know one of the reasons why. Yeah, don't win the war without the army. We got to build the army first. The fact is these activists are few and far between. And as long as the majority of Indigenous people are buying the bs, looking down on their own, believing we can't get past it, feeling all of the effects of internalized oppression, I am not judging. That is a condition of the environment. The flower trying to grow in soil doused in gasoline. But it starts with you. If we Want to change this? It starts with you. I could not do the work I do if I hadn't unpacked that stuff. Stuff. So we have to unpack. What was the quote I wrote down? An unpacked warrior wins. Yeah. Got a deal. And you've heard me talk about entrepreneurship and how I wish I could wave a magic wand and make everyone an entrepreneur. And of course I know that wouldn't work, that there are some personality types that would not thrive here. But the reason I said that is because an entrepreneurship forces you to unpack all of that crap. The insecurity, the lack of confidence, the undervaluing yourself. You. You sell your services for 10, 20 bucks, you're going to starve. It forces you to realize your value and the value of your work. And that's why I wanted to encourage everyone to be an entrepreneur. Like I said, I now realize that's not practical. So I came across this quote on the weekend. Create the highest, grandest vision possible for life because you become what you believe. The quotes from Oprah Winfrey. And if you know anything about her life, she had to hang on to those visions to get through that childhood. And it's so reminded of me of mine swinging in that wooden swing out front in our yard. We did not have a manicured lawn, Canadian Shield. It was more rock than anything. But. I dreamt of being. I dreamt of looking out a window over a cityscape. I dreamt of being my own boss. I dreamt of fancy clothes and high heels. I lived in a small northern Ontario town. You try wearing high heels, you're break your ankle because the streets are not paved. I dreamt of being my own boss. I dreamt of not being poor. I dreamt of having value, of people respecting me and looking to me for guidance. I dreamt of the fancy nails. And look at my life now. Have the crazy vision. Have the crazy dream. Sit on your bed, close your eyes and dream of that fairy tale existence you would live. You don't need to tell anyone about it so they're not going to tease you. But dream that dream as often as you can. Because you're telling creator what you want and trust he will line up to send you the people you need to make it happen. It's going to take work. You don't just get handed it, but you will have the opportunities to work on things that will get you there. That's the point. Watch for what the offers come to you and realize which ones creators sending. So I came up with a list. List of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Seven ways. Huh? Seven generations. Seven ways to overcome that internalized oppression that is telling you you're never going to amount to anything and you're never going to achieve anything. And you can't have your dreams. It is early Sunday morning when I'm shooting this, and I haven't had coffee yet. And I keep wanting to yawn. I should inhale my coffee. So the first way to start believing in yourself and your value and building your confidence, which is in direct opposition to internalized oppression. Develop your skills. I should have totally drank my coffee. Sorry. Develop your skills, whether it's beating, cooking, sewing, knitting, gardening, singing, name it. Fight. And you're gonna suck in the beginning. And that's okay. I've had people try building beading and get so frustrated because it didn't work out the first time, and they throw it down and quit. That's. Wait. Yeah. Why are you expecting perfection from yourself? Because I know what it is. It's insecurity. You already feel like you're a loser and you try something else and fail at it, it feels even worse. So do it privately. By the way, when you build the confidence, you're okay at sucking at things. I suck at cooking. Hardcore suck at it. And I could care. Two beans. It doesn't affect my value. It's just not my skill set. That's what I want for you, that level of confidence. So develop skills. And guess what? If you really want to master something, you keep doing it. I write every single day. I shoot videos every single day. I'm speaking to someone every single day. I didn't get here by accident. This is 15 years of every single day. Find something and become great at it. Or a couple of things. Next. I don't want to put on a pedestal or underestimate the value of education. Because if I didn't know about internalized oppression, I wouldn't know the enemy I was battling, and I wouldn't have figured out how to overcome it. I had to have the education. I had to have the education on Canada. I had to have the education on what happened to indigenous peoples in our past, the past that our elders didn't want to talk about. The schools. I had to learn conflict resolution skills. Excuse me, Indigenous people. Holy moly's. Do I need coffee? Indigenous people were not taught conflict resolution. We were taught how to attack, how to destroy, how to condemn. That's what we experienced in the schools. That's what we learned. I had to learn communication skills, speaking skills, writing skills. I Had to learn assertiveness training, how to stand up for myself without overpowering someone else. There's. I'm not talking aggression. Aggression is not healthy. Assertive, drawing your line. There is a difference. So education in a wide variety of areas, especially how to get along with people, how to influence people, how to negotiate. These are skills we need. Financial literacy, financial education, how to manage your money. Don't you know what? If you can survive a month with deadly squad for money, you can run a business. It's the same skills. You just got a bigger budget. Okay. Another thing that really, really helps build confidence is you gotta set up a life that allows you to have daily wins. Have you heard and I think it was u. S. General. Am I gonna have to pause this video and go eat something or drink a coffee? I don't know. I think it was the u. S. General any. The. The summation of his keynote speech was make your bed every morning. And it amazes me how many people think that was about making your bed. It's not. His point was then you will have accomplished something at the beginning of your day and the rest of your day could be accomplishing more things. I don't make my bed every morning, but I have a to do list every single morning that I do. I listen to my daily fire motivational thing. I, I watch an inspirational video. I read 20 pages out of the book that I'm presently reading. I post on my social media, I shoot a video for the next day. I have a list and I go through the list and check it off and every single one makes me feel amazing. If you want to make your bed is one of your accomplishments. Knock your socks off. But you know what? Pick three things. Four things. I'm like four medicine wheel. Four, four things you're going to do today. You're going to get dressed. Maybe you're going to shower, then you're going to get dressed, you're going to make a meal and maybe you're going to inspire some, encourage somebody. There's four. You get to pet yourself in the back. Okay. Which ties into the next one. And I recently heard this and I was like, that makes so much sense to me. If you want to build your confidence, you're going to keep your promises to yourself. Which means if you wake up in the morning and say today I'm going to do this, make sure you do that. Or else don't say that to yourself. This morning I'm going or today I'm going to try to get my bedroom clean. If I End up having time doing it. That's better. Because that's a promise that allowed for life. There are some things you need to do every single day. I want you to do at least one thing. Not try, do. But don't make promises you can't keep. Because every single time you let yourself down, it's another chip out of your confidence. We're trying to build your confidence here. Another one. Decide who you want to be or who you will be. What are your values? I'll attach the link to Brene Brown's values quiz. It explains. There's a list of 50. You bring it down to your top 10. Not easy to do. Then your top five, then your top two. I know for me when I did it and it's hard. But then I realized, well, I don't need both on this list because if I do this one, I'll also get that one. That kind of thinking. My top two, authenticity and bravery. As long as I'm being authentic and I'm being brave with my words or actions, I'm being me and I'm good. That doesn't mean I'm not. I'm not always productive. I'm not always, I don't know, whatever. But I'm always authentic. I am always who I am and I'm always brave. H makes sense. Next, find your mentors. And guess what? There's a whole bunch of them online. You've heard me talk about Ed Mylet. You've heard me talk about Brenda Brd, Brene Brown. I follow them. Murray Sinclair. Senator Murray Sinclair. I just got his books. Just because they're not in your neighborhood doesn't mean you can't find mentors. I listen to Brendan's voice every single morning. I watch Ed's videos probably four times a week. Those are my mentors. They help me to believe in me. They help me to keep going. They help me to succeed. Why do you think you have to do this on your own? And on top of that, throw in a whole bunch of in real life, elders and mentors and friends that I have who believe in me. And last but not least, yes, Google how to be successful. The first thing it's going to talk about is your inner dialogue, the voice in your head, whatever. And for years I have said, tell the voice in your head to shut up. When the voice in your head says you're stupid or less than or you're never going to amount to anything or the horrible things it says, tell it to shut up. But now I realize there's Two steps to this that I had been doing and didn't recognize. You tell the voice to shut up and you replace the message. So now if it never happens anymore because I've done this for so many years, that voice doesn't say those things anymore. Because the voice in your head is programmable. You are not a victim to it. You decide what you're thinking. First step of empowerment. Realizing that. So when the voice. When I started this, and my voice used to always tell me I was stupid. Why? I'm a tenured domestic abuse survivor. I've heard that so many times. I am not, by the way, straight A students don't tend to be stupid. But I would hear it all the time and. And I would make a mistake in an email or whatever and the voice in my head would say, sandy, you're so stupid. No, that's the shut up part. No, I'm not stupid. I was rushing. I'm not stupid. I was tired. I'm not stupid. I have too much on my plate today. I have to change that. No, I'm not stupid. I need a break. No, I'm not stupid. I need to go eat something. Shut up and change the message. Shut up and change the message. And how long do you do that? Until the voice doesn't say the horrible things anymore. And it works because mine hasn't said those things in years. And trust me, on the blue moon, that something does happen and the voice does say something, I shut it down like that. So there you go. How to get on out of the weight of oppression. It is not about how other people treat you. It's about what you believe. You treat you. Teach them how to treat you. Because we need the army. We need the healed warriors. We need the warriors who have unpacked if we're going to change how we're treated. But we keep focusing. You know why? Because it's easier to point the finger at them. It's easier to say our problems are because of you. What? No, our problems are our problems. The good news is we're strong enough to fix them, okay? Develop your skills. Get your education. Make sure you're doing daily wins, even if that's just your to do list. Keep the promises you make to yourself. Decide who you are or who you want to be. Find your mentors and tell that voice to shut up and change the message. I believe in you. I know this works. Cuz I did it. I'm not stupid. I am an intelligent, strong, successful woman who has achieved more dreams than I ever thought I could. And I would love to see the video you make one day saying the exact same same thing. Until tomorrow. I love you. Take care. Bye. Bye.