Sandi L Boucher, from Same River First Nation, explains why she doesn't celebrate Halloween. Poverty, single parenthood, and the cost of costumes keep her out. As a domestic abuse survivor, Halloween's scares feel like unwelcome reminders of trauma.
Chapters
Boo. Did they scare you? I hope not. I really hope not. I apologized if I did. Just me being a smart aleck, as always. Today is Halloween. I'm wondering, are you celebrating? Are your kids going out trick or treating? I'm not doing either of those. I assume my grandkids are, but that's, that's my daughter and her husband and their family's business. I don't celebrate Halloween for a lot of reasons. And just in case there's some young mums out there struggling with this day, I wanted to make this video just for you. Let's talk about it. Hi everybody. My name is Sandy Boucher. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the Loon clan, a pro, proud member of Same River First Nation in Treaty 3 Territory in Northern Ontario. And today I'm talking about something that has nothing to do with indigenous culture, Halloween. But the reality is, for many indigenous people, poverty is the norm. And I was, I became a single mom when my kids were 2 and 4. I can remember selling furniture to feed my kids. By the way, I worked full time for the federal government at this time as well. Not like I didn't have a job. Kids are expensive, rent is expensive, groceries are expensive. And I used to hate, hate Halloween for a multitude of reasons. One, I didn't have the money to buy a costume that was going to last a half an hour. I didn't have the energy after working full time and then coming home to make dinner to then take the kids out trick or treating. I had absolutely no desire to fight with my kids and try to get them to go to bed when they were arguing with me that they wanted to eat a bunch of candy or they had eaten a lot of candy and now they can't go to bed because they're on a sugar high. I had no desire to buy a whole bunch of candy with money I didn't have for children and other families that I didn't know. It was too much. It was just too much. So if there's a young mom or dad out there and that's how you're feeling, I hear you. I get it. I understand. Just. Just do your best. I know for me, when I think of ghosts, anyone who follows my career knows I'm a 10 year domestic abuse survivor. When I think of ghosts, I don't think a Casper. I think of ghosts that I had to do a lot of therapy to put in my past. I think when I think of things that go bump in the night, I don't think of a favorite scary movie because I don't have a favorite scary movie. My life was scary. I don't need to watch movies to scare. Scary is not fun to me because I've lived through the real scary. I have no animosity, I have no hatred for the people that celebrate this day. You do. You always and forever. But there's some people out there that this day is a struggle. This day is adding on to a long list of things they are barely making through. And maybe, just maybe, we can have a little compassion for them. So if the lights out at the house and they're not giving out candy, maybe say a prayer for them. Maybe there's a really good reason why they're not. Maybe they're just choosing not to. Whatever the case is, let's get better at accepting who people are instead of demanding they're like us, even on Halloween. I hope that made sense. I hope you enjoy this day. Whether you celebrate Halloween or not, I'm gonna love you. Whether you're in a costume or your sweat clothes or whatever suits you, I love you. Until tomorrow. Take care. Bye. Bye.
