It's Never Too Late! (Video Version)

Recording is on. Are you having fun?

I'm just. I'm playing with a microphone set up here so you can't see it in the thing here, but it's. Oh, yeah, this is wobbling and it shouldn't be wobbling. And I don't know why it's wobbling. And of course it'll be some magic thing and I just have to behave myself and stop futzing with it and it'll be fine. But, hey, here we are. Hi.

That was the most honest thing I've ever seen. Welcome to the background life of Sandy and Millie. Unreal. Go for it. Let me do your introduction.

Sure. So, good morning, good afternoon, good evening, good night, wherever and whenever you are. My name is Millie Gormley, and in real life, I am a certified financial planner and I specialize in working with independent women in Ontario. And my whole goal, my gig, my deal, is that I want to have my clients feel like they're in control of their financial lives, to feel like they've got all the pieces of their financial life working together so that they can be calm and comfortable and confident about their futures. That's what I do.

You're lagging again.

Am I? I probably have too many windows open or something. Let me just play around with this for a bit.

Mouth moves, but then the sounds like a split second later.

Okay, well, we may be trying to do too many things at once with Streamyard, so regardless. Regardless of me, you go ahead and you talk and we'll see if I can't get myself sorted out a bit.

Hi, everyone. My name is Sandy Boucher. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the Loon clan, a proud member of Seine River first nation in Treaty 3 territory in Northern Ontario, Canada. And I am focused on, I don't know, bringing a country together, preferably by Tuesday. But I don't think it's going to happen. Come on. I can dream. I offer an Indigenous perspective to non Indigenous people who truly want to learn. The people who have realized that engagement strategies up to now have not been working, that mainstream programs have not been working, that bridges that people have wanted to build for years are not being built. And maybe it's because they're missing a little bit of information. And of course, I still work in First Nation communities with family, friends, colleagues and people friends I haven't even met yet, to help with empowerment, remembering our resilience and the value of our teachings. So, like Millie, I am all about empowerment. Empowering women is my jam. And full disclosure, Millie happens to be My financial advisor. So on my own empowerment journey, not only learning more about money, learning that I could have money, that was a novel thing to learn, and also coupling that with my humility, teaching that I didn't need to know everything about money, that I could become friends and co workers and colleagues with people like Millie who could use their expertise to help me accomplish what I wanted to accomplish without me having to learn a whole bunch of stuff that is never going to make sense to me. So I totally appreciate people like Millie.

Yes. Thank you. And I appreciate you because Lord knows we need more of what you are doing in this country.

Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. And. And I was thinking about this this morning. I think one of the reasons my seminars are so popular is I have zero interest in shaming guilt. I have zero interest in making someone feel bad. Most times it's missing information or misinformation that they've received. We can have a respectful conversation. I can answer questions. I can encourage them in the right areas and keep them away from things that might cause them problems in the future. And I get to work with the most amazing people. Reality is, the problematic people don't hire me. They're not. They don't go to my seminars. Go figure. But the people that do want us to be together, and that's just so encouraging. Right?

Yeah. And, and I feel the exact same way in my very different sphere. Like people up over decisions they've made in the past or because they've been given information from their parents or their grandparents, that doesn't work well for them. That's not doing anybody any good. I mean, my, my whole thing is, you know, let's get clear on where you personally are at right now, and let's give you the tools and the information that you need to move forward and then let's, you know, let me help you do these things so you don't have to do it all yourself. I think that's. I think that's something that, in this, certainly from the mainstream or the white perspective, this idea of you have to be able to handle everything yourself and asking for help or outsourcing to an expert is somehow failing. That's. That's a really terrible. That's a really terrible thing because there's all kinds of things in this world that we shouldn't attempt to do ourselves 100%.

Why does cooking come up every time I talk to you? There is something I should never attempt. Ask anyone who's ever eaten a meal. I attempted, but what I was thinking, when you Just said that it was kind of like a light went on for me in that. That mindset of I have to do it on my own. If I need help, I'm a failure. Is a hundred percent a trauma response that you've reached out or leaned on someone in the past and that really didn't go well, or you got the backlash for reaching out. So now it's, if I don't ask for help, no one can say no. No one can judge me.

Okay.

I think I just figured why a whole bunch of women haven't reached out to you yet. And I really hope they're listening to this podcast, because that is that one step, that one admitting you need help and that that does not make you less. That makes you wise, not weak.

Wrong.

W word. I always say that could change so much because I know. Well, I don't want to say I know the stuff you do in the background. I have a vague idea of the things you do in the background.

Basically, it involves me sitting in front of a lot of numbers.

Yeah, well, you know. Yeah. And that's like. You just described my worst nightmare. But I appreciate the end game. I appreciate the result. I appreciate feeling like I have a teammate as opposed to doing this on my own. So I hope people are listening.

Either the entirety of society has a trauma response, or it's just. No, I don't know. Not just me.

Women are a marginalized group.

Yeah.

So even though we're half the bloody population 100, and there's trauma there. Right.

Yes.

And. And aren't we supposed to be super women and know everything and be able to do everything and.

Oh, yeah, for sure. Bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, blah, blah, blah. All this other crap. Yeah. You know, 2.3 children, blah, blah, blah.

Yeah.

University degree.

You know, See, like math, my head went 2.3. What?

That's the statistical thing. Yes, I know. There's no such thing as a third of a child unless you've got some very weird custody situation.

That's.

That's just.

That's another kind of podcast. And we're not gonna go there.

No, we're not gonna go there. No.

Millie, I know you trust me with everything, but did you happen to look at what the theme for today's show was?

No. I'm terribly sorry. I have not. You know what?

I was confessed.

I have not.

I knew it. It was like, she's not good to look. She's just that trusting and that awesome. It's amazing.

Okay, let's hear it.

It's the four words, it's never too late.

It's never too late. Okay.

And I think we.

That's faithful, depending on what we're talking about.

Well, you know what I think I know I could definitely think of career responses. I could think of personal responses, I could think of female, you know, centered responses. There is so much. So I guess I'm going to throw out a question there. If you had to think back over your life, career, whatever, the whole nine yards, could you think of a time where maybe you thought it was too late but you did it anyways, or someone else told you it was too late and you did it anyways and now you're so glad you did.

Yeah, I can actually. And it, it seems kind of silly now when I look back on it, because I was very young when I thought it was too late to do something. I thought it was too late to change careers when I was 36 years old, which seems flipping ridiculous now. Like, come on, like. Well, and this was, this was back in a time, you know, Q sepia toned overlay. That the idea of people changing careers wasn't as common. You know, the, the, the standard school. You got a job, you stayed there for 30 years and then you got your gold watch and you're retired with a company pension. That was still very much a standard and a thing. Right. So when I changed careers at 36, I was worried that was it too late for me? Should I just stick in the career that I was in, which wasn't terrible. You know, I was making decent money, I had a, I had a steady job, I had benefits and a pension and everything was, you know, not quite golden handcuffy. I wasn't making that much money, but I was miserable. I wasn't having any fun and I changed my career and I genuinely was worried that it's. Is it too late for me to make this change? Because a lot of the people that were. So I went to this training thing when I first, when I first switched and all. Well, not all of, most of the people in that class of 20 some odd people were at least 10 years younger than me. So that, that starts, you know, the old insecurities firing up pretty quick. And yeah, I was genuinely concerned that I would not be wise to make this big of a change this late stage in my career. Well, that was, you know, 18 years ago and here we are. So. Yeah, but yeah, that was, that was a thing back for me once.

Trying to think, is there a time. Well, anyone who knows me knows I Would never listen to someone else too late that it doesn't even enter my realm. But I'd be willing to bet there were times that I thought it.

There may have been times that people around you thought it and just didn't have the guts to say it to your face.

Oh, well, that's true too. I mean, I was mid. Kind of along the lines of your story. I was mid-40s when I walked away from a seriously good paying job. The most money I was ever making and all the perks works like, I mean, those crazy things stat holidays and paid holidays and mileage getting paid like, I mean, it was almost like an extra paycheck every month. And I walked away from that to start my own business. And to me, insanity. It wasn't that I'm certain there were people except for my kids because they know me, but I'm certain there's people that thought I was insane, including the bosses that I gave my notice to. But for me, it was more, I have to do this before it's too late. Yeah, right.

And that's. And that came into play for me as well too. Because you know, okay, if you haven't done this when you're 36, well, in four years you're going to be 40. Is that the right time to start making changes? Yeah, you might as well bite the bullet, leap over the cliff and just do the thing. Yeah.

And for me, it was because I am so goal oriented, it's not even funny. If I don't have a target or a goal, I can waste time with the best of them. Like, as much as I might be exhausted from a busy schedule, I need a busy schedule because it keeps me focused. If I have a whole bunch of days where there's nothing coming up, meh. That's about how much stuff I get done, like diddly.

That's okay. That's. That's what those down times are for. That's.

Oh, I'm talking work days.

You know what? I, I ran into this earlier this week actually, so I, I didn't have a lot in the schedule and you kind of have to look at that. There's. There's such a thing as work rest too, right? Because. So that gives me. Well, it gave me an opportunity to clean up this trash pile that my office has become. So that was good. And just a little bit of time to refocus, to reset, to just step back and take a look at the business. Because we were talking about this last week, you know, now that you've hired your Marketing, your manager, your general manager. Right. So that gives you an opportunity to focus on other things. Well, if you had been going full bore, constantly, bang, bang, bang, never had a minute to yourself, you never would have gotten to the point where it's like, hey, I can hire a guy to do these things for me. Right.

So not all bad. Yeah. And that's where mine. It's never too late really comes in for me. It's never too late to improve how you're doing things 100%. So I am constantly in a evaluation, reflection. How do I tweak this? I love improving things. And I think I mentioned last time I had no idea how close to burnout I was until I got helped and started backing away. And it's like, I am exhausted, never mind tired. I'm exhausted and hiring. Yes. Okay, full disclosure. I hired my older brother as my general manager. And even to say that, like, did I ever think I'd be successful enough to hire my brother at the salary he demands? Right. Because he's had his successful career as well and earned that rating. Did I ever think I'd be able to do that? And no, I didn't think, but best decision I ever made for I have learned so many things in the. Not even a month yet that he's been on board. For one, we both handle frustration exactly the same way. Oh, it's not pretty. But the one time. No, no, just frustration. And literally when he. No, he was honest enough to admit to me that he was challenged by something I had assigned and it wasn't working properly. And just watching his frustration, I was like, oh, I am like watching myself in a mirror. I know, right? Which then of course gets you thinking. Did our parents teach us this, like, where? Like the fact that we have had entirely different careers, but we react in the exact same way, even though our personalities aren't exactly the same. That was interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah. The other thing is, for the first time in a 15 year career, I'm not doing this alone. I have someone putting in just as many hours, caring just as much. I'm adjusting. And that's the process. I am adjusting to have someone caring about my physical well being. Like, I got a text from my brother the other day that literally said it was like 6:00 clock P. M. And it said, you're getting sleepy, meaning back away from the desk, go to bed.

Right. Like, I love that. That's adorable.

Yeah.

And you know, that's. That's sort of the benefit of hiring a family member because an average paid Employee wouldn't think to do that or wouldn't have the guts to do that.

So.

But because he's your brother, he'll do that. And that could go the other way, too. He can be, you know, overstepping and obnoxious because he's your brother and you let him get away with it where you wouldn't let.

Yeah. And I definitely haven't run into that. He has so much respect for the career I've built and just wants to help build it as opposed to cause any waves. In fact, the tasks that he was so frustrated with, I realized I had assigned way too much to him right in the beginning when he was getting used to systems and things. So I actually pulled it back from him and said, you know what? I'm going to continue doing this for time being, master these other areas, will revisit in six months. And he was so blown away that he had someone that cared. He was frustrated. So it's just like the most perfect combination. I run things past him just to get his opinion. Yeah. It's. And then some decisions I just make. And he totally respects that. He knows it's my company. He touches base. Like, how would you like to do things? So the one thing I have realized, and you're going to laugh at me because I don't even know why I'm surprised, because I'm certain I've done this a million times in my life.

Okay.

But so many things are changing all at the same time. So I brought on new staff. So they're getting used to systems.

Right.

We brought in the new customer Relationship management system, the CRM. So that's brand new to all of us. And we're all in a learning curve with that.

Yeah.

I'm in the middle of moving my office space, so that's changing. It's like, who thought all of this was a good idea to do at the same time? Having said that, when the dust settles.

Yes.

Which I'm hoping for, like mid July, we will all be up in operational and in the new space. And the new space comes with decks and a big backyard and the perfect, perfect space for me to retreat to after a work day and sit outside or, you know, I envision first thing in the morning with a coffee, just thinking about the day and allowing that creative time as opposed to, you know, the hustle. So.

Yeah. Well, that. That brings to mind that whole concept of morning routine. Like, so there's so many success coaches out there and business coaches and that sort of thing. And there's one in particular that I've been following for a years now. He's a coach for financial advisors. And his big thing is the morning routine. I mean, he's. So his particular morning routine involves him getting up at like 4:45 in the morning, which is insane. And I don't do that. But you know, the idea of being deliberate about what you do in the morning to set yourself up for the day. So you get up, you move your body, you get a little bit of exercise, you drink some water, you have a shower, you know, you get some food or some coffee into you before you start looking at your emails. Like, you know, picking up your phone and looking at emails in bed is just not generally a good way to set yourself up for the day. So just the whole idea of being very deliberate about how you set yourself up, I love that. And it's one of those things. You keep trying it, you keep doing it, you keep falling off the wagon, you keep adjusting it and changing it to make it work for you. But to me, that's been a very key component because I know when I can do sort of the things that I want to start my day with, my day is inevitably going to go much smoother if I don't walk into this office with 30 things going off in my head already.

Yeah, yeah. I most definitely have a morning routine to the point that it's a task list in Asana. And there are certain things I do, journal entries, you know what, my morning mindset is one of them. So I'm preparing for the day. I listen to the daily fire that Brendan Burchard does. So that's in inspirational message. So just getting myself into that, that pumped up. I've got this, this is going to be excellent kind of mood. If I. Out of curiosity, maybe you don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but I'm going to ask it anyways.

Sure.

Have you ever read your emails in bed before you got up?

Oh, constantly.

I have never done that.

Oh, no. God, are you kidding me? Yes, absolutely. I mean, I had this. Well, not this particular phone because it was a long time ago, but when I was in the hospital having my back surgery, I had my phone with me and I was doing emails, you know, in, in on a gurney, for Pete's sake. Oh, I've totally done that. Absolutely. Do I recommend it? No, because. Well, okay, I don't recommend it, but I could see how it happens because you go to bed with something on your mind. You're. You're waiting for something to happen and.

Yeah, okay. In that case I could see if you're waiting for a response. Yeah, I.

Should you be getting a response at 6am?

Yeah.

Like, how insane is that? Right? So, yeah, it's different now because I'm not in a 24 7. So when I was in insurance, when I was doing claims, that's a little bit different because things happen overnight. You know, things start on fire in the middle of the night. So it was a little bit more urgency there. But now, you know, everything that happens in my day can happen between nine and five, for the most part.

Exactly. Somewhere like we both take training at different times and ages ago, someone mentioned that the email inbox is someone else's to do list and that so stuck with me that checking my emails is probably 10th or 12th on my morning routine list.

That explains why when I email you first thing in the morning, I don't hear back till after lunch. Well, now I don't know. I know why.

It's like I have.

I'm not pooping on you for it. I think that's good.

Yeah. I set the groundwork for my day and then when I know that's solid, then it's like, okay, now I gotta see. Do I have to adjust things? What's going on with the email? Does someone need to reschedule? Whatever.

Yeah.

So, yeah, I have a bad case.

With fomo, like that whole fear of missing out thing. So I have to be very deliberate with myself about not checking emails first thing. And it's still something that's. That's still a. I'll call it a problem, you know, that I, that I have. That I will tend to jump into the email box too soon at the beginning of the day. And then that sidetracks you, right? So it's like, oh, I'll just take care of one little thing. Right?

Yeah. A hundred percent inside tracks you. I definitely was there probably 14 of the 15 years I've been in business. That fear of missing out because we don't get it. Steady paycheck. If there's someone requesting a quote, you want to get on that. Until I realized I was training them that I was going to do that. Right. And it's like they know how busy I am. So why am I acting like I'm not?

Yeah.

So I know one of the things my brother loves is come like three, four or five. It depends on the day, what time I'm quitting for the day. I start at 6am every day, so. But at that point, the Lights are going off in this office. I'm heading to my living room and excuse the expression, creator himself couldn't make me come back in here. I may. If something urgent, someone calls, I may say, I'll get back to you tomorrow. Like, obviously, if they got through, I can see if it's something urgent, but. And now the best part, like, I. I must have been doing an event. Yeah. A full day seminar. And I just put the autoresponder. If you need something, email Ernie.

Yay.

It's like. It's like I don't feel. Because for me, it was the guilt of feeling like I was ignoring someone important to me. A customer.

Yeah.

Or something.

Absolutely.

But now that I know. Exactly. And now that I know I have someone very responsible that can handle it. It's like, email him. If it's not urgent, you won't. And if it is, you should email him. He can handle it. And if it's really urgent that you need me, he knows how to get a hold of me. Yeah. But that's not something I'm putting out into the general public. Right.

Except you just did.

It was so, like, I was. I literally stopped when. After I had typed the autoresponder, and I was like, my customers are going to get taken care of, even though I'm busy all day.

Yeah.

And it was amazing.

That is awesome, actually. Yes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, It's. Yeah. And I think. Oh, sorry.

We have higher and harder expectations of ourselves than our. Than our clients do. You know, I've called someone up apologizing that they went to voicemail and they're like, no, we understand you're. You're with somebody. So. Yeah, my call went to voicemail. It's okay. It's like, I'm sorry I can't be 100 available for everybody 100 of the time. Well, no one actually expects that. And if someone is that unreasonable, you don't want them as a client anyway.

Yeah. And for me, this is going to sound ludicrous in hindsight, but I had, like, my salesperson as well as my brother point out, everyone is shocked that you answer the phone. Like, you have this team and this business you built for 15 years. Why can I reach you? Right. Like, no one is expecting to directly reach you. And I was like, that is such a valid point.

Interesting, right?

Yeah. It's like, oh, my God. Yeah. So. And I had a few people like, Sandy, is this actually you like? And. Yeah. Heads up. So, yeah, it's.

It's the distractions. Right. If you can Eliminate those distractions. And it's not that you're telling other people that they're not important to you. What you're saying is that whatever it is that you're working on at this moment is too important to be. To be, you know, yanked off course by. By a phone call or an email. And if you can kind of get that, you know, sort of through your own head, that what I'm working on is important, then the other things will. Will come and you'll. You'll deal with them when you can. Right?

Yeah. And the thing is, and I know you're the exact same way when I'm shooting a podcast with you, this is where my focus is. I'm not going to answer the phone and do all these other things. If I'm in a seminar, that's who gets my focus. And whoever has to wait when it's their turn, they get 100% of my focus. So rather than everyone getting 10% and no one appreciating my lack of effort, it's like, no, this is just wasn't on my agenda yet. If you want to meet, I'll be happy to put you on the agenda. But yeah, yeah.

So I think, well, you remember multitasking, right? They've finally done the research that proves it's not multitasking. You're not doing two things at once. You are quickly switching between two or three or five things at once, but you're. You're not able to. You are not physically able to focus on more than one thing at a time, which is what drove me batty when I was working in corporate and I had, you know, a scorecard of all the multiple priorities that we have. We have like, this is. These are our five focuses for this quarter. Well, you can't have five things to focus on. You can only focus on and prioritize one thing at a time.

Yeah. For me, and maybe. Maybe I just misread the manual. For me, multitasking was always, I'm working while the dishwasher is going and the washing machine's to going, going. Oh, yeah, that's multitasking.

Yeah. But technically the machines are doing the task.

Exactly. But I'm up and let them go. Exactly. That was the extent of my multitasking. Yes. I'm getting three tasks done, but only one. I can only focus on one. Right. But if I can delegate something or whatever the case may be.

Exactly. You're delegating the dishes to the dishwasher. I got a Roomba a couple of years ago. And I love the thing. I hear it bonking around in the hallway and it's like my floors are getting clean there. It's. Now it's not as fast and it's not as good as if I did it myself. I will admit that. You know, I can go through and Swiffer the room a lot faster and I'll get the corners that it misses, but it's getting done to a reasonable degree, and I'm doing something more important, so.

I have one, too. It was a Christmas present to myself two years ago. What I get a kick out of. I don't know if you have the app on the phone for yours.

No, mine's pretty low tech.

Oh. So I have an app on my phone. I am not kidding here. Every now and then I get a notification, like, as if someone texted me, and it says, I'm sorry, I'm hanging off a cliff. Can you come help me? And he's caught on an extension cord. Help me, Mommy.

I'm stuck.

My energy. Can you please take me back to the base? It is. The messages are hilarious.

That's hilarious. Well, mind if it gets stuck, it'll start beeping, you know, so I'll have to. I'll have to hear it and then go rescue it. Go bail them out.

Right. I can hit find, but otherwise I just get a text message. It's like, what cliff? There is no cliff in this.

Well, when you're this tall, a cliff that's this tall. If you're 3 inches tall, the cliff is a half an inch tall. Yep.

He gets caught on my weight machine every single time he tries to run over the leg. And then he ends up. Yeah, it's hanging himself up.

You know, I love how we refer to them as he.

Yes. He's doing the floor.

He's doing the floor.

Read into that whenever you care. To viewers and listeners. Yes. So I was just thinking about this. This idea of it's never too late. And I think for me, and correct me if I'm wrong or if you feel differently, but to me, the counterbalance to that is then you're stuck doing it the way you are for the rest of your life. Like, it's either no change or it's never too late. And you can change. Right. And for us being in business, never mind just being human. Like, I think of the things I used to do, even in my 30s, 40s, that I would not do now and then, there's probably things I do now that some people might think I'm too old to do. And tough noogies. If there's One thing at 60 years old is I no longer care about your opinion. Right.

Yeah.

Isn't that my journey?

So good to kind of let that go? You know, that. That whole consideration for what other people think of you as when you're walking down the street that. Yeah.

Oh, I don't. And I don't know about. I'd be interested to hear your reasoning behind it. But for me, anytime I think of, you know, someone else's opinion, it's. I have lived and earned the right to live my life my way. Like, I have done it your way. I've tried it. I've tried all these different boxes. Boxes. None of them worked for me. 60 years of trying. It's my turn, right?

Yeah.

Don't like it, don't watch, turn around, go away the other way. So, yeah.

Yeah. I don't know. I mean, when I think about that, for myself at least, I don't recall being incredibly worried about what other people thought of me when I was younger, though I know I did more so than I do now because I would always feel kind of fairly comfortable, fairly confident doing my own thing and not worrying about, you know, while every. Everybody else is doing whatever. Right.

Yeah.

So that. That whole peer pressure thing that they weren't warned you about in middle school was not that big of an issue for me.

Yeah.

But for me, I think it became, and I'm going to call it a hormonal thing, you know, as I got into my 50s and I got, you know, menopausal and I got menopause weight on me that I can't get rid of. And I got to the point where it's like, okay, this is who I am. I am not going to turn myself inside out to try and achieve something that may or may not be achievable. See, I acknowledge the existence of limits and the possibility of things not working out right or not going the way you want or being or not being able to do everything you want just because you want it. So if that's going to be the case, I have gotten to a point of acceptance where, okay, this is who I am. This is what my body looks like, you know, as an example. And if someone else doesn't like it, I don't give a flying, oh, a hundred percent.

And to me, it definitely comes down to the reason why. Yeah, I could care 2 beans what size someone else thinks I should be. Having said that, do I want to be a smaller size for my health? Absolutely. And by the way, lost eight pounds. Yes.

Congratulations.

So it does end that whole menopause thing you were talking about. So I, I am living proof that if you live long enough, it does get easier because I did a solid 10, 15 years that I literally could have just lived on air and would not have lost a pound. I mean, it's, it's a reality, it's a thing. Right. So, yeah, I think it really depends, like even with our businesses and we've had this conversation, I don't want to earn. I'm just going to pull a number under the air here. I don't want my business earning a million dollars a year because someone says that's the definition of success. Oh, I have targets I want to achieve, but they're my targets and they're not even anyone else's business. Right. And that's between me and my team. Right. And I have my reasons for that. That and, and I'm certain you have this conversation on a regular basis is like, what do you. For me, it's that security, not worrying about how to pay the bills, that freedom that comes with not worrying about paying the bills. Those are the things that appeal to me. And there's a dollar amount attached to it. But I'm not renting a billboard to say I made X number of dollars. It's like that's, that's not the goal. It's what it gets me is the goal.

Well, exactly. It's. That whole comparison is the thief of joy concept. Right. If you are happy in your business and your life, whether or not you're an entrepreneur, you've got a job or you're a stay at home person. Yeah. If you are comfortable with your life, whether or not it's. I look at your life and say, oh, I don't know if I'd be comfortable with that. That, you know, you're, you, you're, you don't have X amount of dollars in your RSP yet. You know, whatever, whatever, whatever that, that metric is.

Yeah.

It's nobody else's flipping business for one. And if you're comfortable and you're happy and you are in a point in a place where you're not asking me to subsidize your decisions in life. Yeah. And we now that could get a very, into a very political debate about welfare very quickly. And I don't want to do that. But you know, yeah, it's, I do believe we as a society need to take care of the people among us who have a difficult, difficult start for whatever Reason society needs to take care of people. But at the same time people need to take care of themselves too. And as long as you're trying your best to take care of yourself, then I'm willing to help you.

100. I have all the time in the world for someone's trying to and, and I'll, I'll cruise into the dangerous turf because that's what I do. Yes, I believe we have to take care of people. But how are we taking care of them and enabling people and, and allowing them not to have to figure out how to stand on their own? Now there's some people who can't and that's a totally separate group. And, and of course we need to take care of them. But I know when I started my business, so this is how long ago I started my business, there used to be this program where you could go on EI for a year and you would get your EI payments while you were building your business. And any money that you earned you could put back into your business rather than having to repay ei. So I'll full disclosure. I did go through that program. Now I would have told you to. Well, I was getting 700 every two weeks.

Okay.

There is no way on God's green earth I could have lived on that with my car payment and my rent payment and utilities and everything. And every single day of my entrepreneurial journey I have thanked creator for that fact. Because I had to hustle. Failure was not an option. I could not choose not to work today because I knew I was going to get a check in. It was not big enough. It kept me from starving, but it would have been a slow starvation.

Yeah.

So I love that because I see other people and I don't know if you run into them, but I meet a lot of people who think they want to think they want to become entrepreneurs but they're looking for funding to do it. And it's like if it's dependent on funding then you don't have the drive yet. That.

Yeah.

Like you. Because it's going to die as soon as the funding does.

Yes.

Right.

Absolutely.

I am so thankful that I had to hustle. And in my house, the house we grew up in, you were either in school or working. Laying on a couch was not an option in my parents house and, and my parents worked hard so we had the example. But like I've had to hustle for from day one of my business and I wouldn't have year 15 without year one. So absolutely, I, I, I agree with that. Helping someone to stand on their two feet. I believe I forget what it was one of the states, and I hate using the US as an example for anything, but in this one state, there was some form of social assistance, but it was for like, like six months. So what they were acknowledging is at different times during your life, sometimes you get knocked on your ass and sometimes you need a little support to get up on your feet. But everyone going into it knows it's only a break.

Yeah.

Right. So you don't become dependent on it. You use it as that bridge to get you to something. Right. And I, I hate to say it, but I kind of like that model that it's like. No, I like the idea there's some kind of net when in, you know, life does its thing and the whole bottom falls out. But it's not a dependency.

There's an end game to it.

Exactly.

Even with ei, when you, when you go on ei, and I've been on EI before, you know, back in the day when, you know, before it was something.

When we had jobs.

When we had jobs.

Yes, yes.

Well, sometimes the job ends and you go on a. Yeah, but with ei, at least there's. There's a time frame. You've got. You earn this many weeks, it's going to stop at this time. So, yeah, I mean, at the beginning, you might take a week or two to lick your wounds and, you know, get over your mental trauma from what? You know, getting laid off or whatever. And I absolutely support the idea of people taking care of themselves and taking a little bit of time when a job ends, especially if it ends, you know, in a traumatic fashion, to really step back and think about what you want the rest of your life to look like, as opposed to just leaping right back in and grabbing the first thing that comes along. But you've got to get yourself to a point where this is the end game. This is when this money stops coming in. What am I going to do after that? Or am I going to sit around and whine? Well, my EI ran out. Now I have to. Whatever, right?

Yes. Done. Yeah. And you know what? That reminds me of my mom so much because in one of those Titanic plate kind of times in my life when my finances were like, scary af, my relationship had just ended. I had two kids dependent on me, and I was in college full time. So because I'm First Nations, I get funding from my community while I'm in school. But it was the summer, so now my brain instantly goes to, I need Mine because you don't get the funding for the two months. Right. So.

Right.

I was like, oh my God, I gotta go find a job. Like, mom, can you help me watch the kids or something? Like, I got to figure something out here. And my mom totally shocked me because she was like, no, actually, like, you're not going to go get a job. You're going to go on assistance for the summer and you're going to take the two months. And I was like, my mom is telling me to go on this. This has never happened. And what she said is, this insanity is not going to derail your plans. You're going to finish that course. That was your plan. Right now. You're going to take two months to spend time with your kids to help them over this trauma. You're going to take time to heal. You're going to enjoy this summer. And then come September, you're back in school. And if you need help watching the kids, then I'm happy to help. But you take the time. And I was like, wow, right? And I'm so. Thank. That's exactly what happened. And I was able to finish my course rather than let someone else's actions derail it. Right, right.

Because if you had picked up a job that it would have been very easy come September to say, I can't.

Stay with the job 100. There's. There's no way I wouldn't know. So now we get to the section of our podcast where we talk about the books we're reading, the books we recommend, and our favorite quote.

So, okay, well, I will, I will actually admit this time around to reading fiction. I'm, I've come to the conclusion that it's. There's no, there's no shame in not reading, you know, like important things all the time. So I picked up a. It's actually a series and it is called, if I can find, if I can get the. It's called Renegade Star, the complete series, books 1 to 16. So it's a sci fi thing. You know, they're going through space, they're. They're getting shot at and robots and AI and, and it's just very violent and. Yeah. But very entertaining. And it's just, it's been killing some time out in the backyard when it hasn't been pouring rain. And I've really been enjoying it. So. Yeah, so that's, that's what I've. What I'm reading at the moment.

I love, I don't, I love this series. Like, I don't know about you. But I'm one of those people that, like, totally get into a book. Like, I felt depressed when I get to one the end of a book. Like, I miss that character. Right.

I want.

I needed more right now. I'm going to admit something, too, this week, and this is just. Why do we keep saying week? Did you notice you've done it?

I've done it because we did another recording session last week, and that's probably. Yes.

Searcher. I'm gonna admit that with all the new stuff going on in my life, I definitely cut into my reading time. So I am still working on the Power of One More, which I absolutely love. It's Ed Mylett, definitely enjoying it. Bouncing between reading it in book form and listening on audible. If I have some time in the car, but I'm getting close to the end, but definitely haven't finished it yet. Do I recommend it? Yes. That's not my book recommendation this week, by the way. But what I've read so far, absolutely. So, yeah. Speaking of which, Millie, what's your book recommendation?

Well, that's a little bit trickier because I don't know that I have one or. Well, let me. Actually, no, I'm going to go back. I'm gonna. I'm gonna not say that. I'm gonna go back into my library in my. In my Kindle here and find one that I have finished reading that I can recommend. Let's look at the personal development section. Actually, this one is quite relevant. It's called Deep Work by Cal Newport. And it's all about focusing and how to avoid, you know, multitasking and, you know, all the ways that we can get to the point where we're not flailing around doing 10,000 things a day, but we are doing the important things. So I read that one a little while ago and I have enjoyed it very, very much. What is the subtitle from? Now I need to get my cheaters out. Deep Work Rules for Focused Success in a distracted world.

100L Newport.

A big fan. Big fan of that.

Okay. Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice.

What about you?

Totally going to a different page now. So my recommendation, and I would highly recommend this to everyone and anyone. It's Richard Wagames's Embers. So, not familiar with that one. Ojibwe Meditations. So it's a whole bunch of just little quotes, little like, almost like a daily inspirational thing, but everything rooted in his life, in his Anishinaabe way of looking at things like this. Every indigenous person I know who read it Was like blown away, like, yes. And so many non indigenous people I know just totally just appreciate it and. And it really resonates with them. So cool. Yes. Highly recommend. What is your quote for this week?

I. I just realized I went out of focus because I moved something to the camera. So let's see if I can fix it. So what I'm doing right now is putting up a card with my quote on it. So I have this set there. It fixes that work. I have the set of. I don't call it tarot cards or whatever, but it's on along the theme of self care. And so every once in a while you pull one of these out and you read it to yourself and you, you know, think, okay, this is the thought I'm gonna have for today. And the one I pulled out this morning actually was a Louise Hay quote as she. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you know her like she's.

Hey, House.

Yeah, hey, House. Yeah, a lot of fairly woo, but some very interesting insights in there. Do the work, all that kind of stuff. Okay. Okay. So the quote I pulled out from her was as an affirmation and it says, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn't worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens. Wow, I like that.

Right? I love that.

That.

I think we all needed to hear that some days. Right. My quote is obviously out of Richard's book because, duh, that would just be too easy. And this one, I am a huge fan and it's probably my Anishinaabe teachings. But simple everyday things that remind you of deep things. Right. It's kind of like the hint to remember your values. Right. So that's exactly what this is. So here's the quote. Every year, one spring has sprung, my world regains proper proportion because baseball is back. I love the central. Right. I love this. I love the central metaphor of the game. All of us helping each other to make it home. Funny how a game can teach us so much about life.

That's really nice.

Right? And I was thinking, I thought of your work when I read that, you know, people helping others get home and you're helping women build foundations that they can live their life on. Right? So.

Yeah, yeah, no, you're right. Oh, I love that. Really good. Note to end on.

Yes. Now I'm gonna give a little hint to the next episode.

Okay.

No, we can write it down so she remembers.

Yes, I will.

Now this one's gonna be hilarious. I can just see it now. It's called Mistakes are teachers.

Okay.

We get to share this stuff.

We did come for the gory details.

Yes. Because no one gets to our age and stage of our entrepreneurial journey or life journey without the mistakes.

Oh, Lord.

Yeah.

I can think of so many already.

Yes. And you might be really surprised. But you know what, honestly, when I hear someone else's challenges or the mistakes they made, I find it so inspiring. It's like, wow, you weren't perfect but you achieved what you achieved. Right. Like it, it makes them more relatable.

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. All right, we're looking forward to it.

Yes. Until next time, everyone. Take care. Would love to hear your feedback. Please comment whether you're sending us a message or commenting on the YouTube video. Thank you so much for joining us again. Once again, I'm Sandy Boucher.

And I'm Millie Gormley.

Until next time. Take care. Bye bye.