My Rule and My Hope for Indigenous/Canadian Reconciliation

So I'm in my 15th year in business and I dedicate every word, every seminar, every workshop, every keynote, every video to advancing Indigenous Canadian reconciliation. Despite what happens almost every single day, despite the disrespect and the anti Indigenous racism and the minimizing of the issue, and on and on and on. And often I am asked, how can you keep doing it? Like you actually enjoy your work? How can you keep doing this? Where do you find the fuel, the, the drive to keep doing this? There's one rule that I believe to be absolutely true. And in my near 60 years on this planet, I've seen people prove me right time and time again, even when it involves Canada. So let's talk about it. Foreign. Edition across Mung Dodam. Hi everybody. My name is Andy Boucher. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the Loon clan, a proud member of Seine River First Nation in Treaty 3 Territory in Northern Ontario. And now we're talking about resilience and determination and perseverance and, and how activists and, and influencers and speakers and leaders like me keep going on the reconciliation path. For one, let's acknowledge we're Indigenous. Like, do we have a choice? Like, like our kids are dying. There are legislation that reduces us to second class citizens, tons of legislation. If we change, nothing, nothing changes. And I want so much more for my children and my grandchildren. So it has to change. But in the opening I mentioned I have one rule, one belief, many beliefs, but one that keeps me going. And for those who follow my channel, if you're a subscriber, thank you so much. If you're new to my channel, welcome. I hope this resonates with you. I would love to hear what you think. There is one belief that keeps me going even on the most challenging days. And what that is. Yes, I got my handy Dandy index card. People will live up to the bar you set for them. Think about it. Don't argue. Think about it. People will live up to the bar you set for them. So I have had people who thought my words were not worth their time. They quickly became not worth mine. But I would rather focus on the many inspirational leaders I have had who believed in me before I could. And I took everything in me to live up to the image they had. I lived up to the bar they set for me. And I've seen it time and time again with the youth I work with that I will remind them that they carry gifts and that their only job is to discover what their gifts are and share those gifts with the world. That those people that look down on them are wrong. That their vision problem is not the use value problem. The fact that someone else can't see how amazing they are, that's the, the other person's eye problem. They should get to the optometrist because the value is a given. So first off today, can we all be careful of the bar we set for other people? If you keep gossiping about your next door neighbor and how horrible they are, don't be surprised when they act horrible to you. If you're telling them instead how much you love their garden and their yard is so amazing and you love having such a beautiful home next door. Watch how they're going to react to you. Now that's not always the case. There are some incredibly bitter people out there again and they're acting like they're. You're not worth their time, make sure they're not worth yours. But people live up to the bar we set for them. So when it comes to Indigenous Canadian reconciliation, what I'm saying is don't let Canada off the hook. Refuse to let Canada off the hook even though every single time the, the government disappoints me. Y that still missed the boat. But we're going to get on that boat. We're going to do it next time. Maybe you need a little more education, maybe you need a little more guidance, but I know you can do this. I believe in you. Yesterday I attended a meeting offering some guidance with a bunch of other people on a non indigenous entity. They're trying to do a reconciliation plan and they wanted some feedback. And, and there were some negative things that had to be pointed out about the history of this organization. But I made a point of highlighting that if we didn't believe this organization could get it together, none of us would have attended this meeting. We don't invest time and effort into something if we don't believe it can change. Every single person working towards reconciliation. It's because they believe Canada can get it together. And, and that's my belief more than anything. I would not have put in 15 years of experience and time and effort and banging my head on the wall sometimes and, and doing rant videos when someone goes way out of line. I wouldn't have done any of that if I didn't believe in the outcome. I believe that Canadians can learn. And with each passing day I meet more than want to. Now keep in mind the problematic people are nowhere near my seminars or keynotes. They're not coming, they're not hiring me. That's okay. I consider that creator's way of protecting me. We're just going to make sure Sandy doesn't have to endure that person. But I have spoke to audiences of more than a thousand people. They do want to learn. That's. That's my fuel. That's what keeps me going. I believe they are that Canadians are okay with change when they understand why. And what a time and time and time again when I meet people that are afraid of what reconciliation looks like, it's because they don't have a picture. They have no idea what it's going to mean. What's it going to mean for them personally? What's it going to mean for their job? What's it going to mean for the future of the country? Is it going to cost them more? Is it, does it mean that their needs are going to be pushed aside if we get better? My mom, my elders, Freedom McDonald comes to mind again, paint the picture for them. Paint the picture. If they can't see it, paint the picture again. Why? I use PowerPoint in my seminars and keynotes. Painting the picture for them, helping them to see so they don't have to be afraid. As a 10 year domestic abuse survivor myself, no one on this planet should be afraid. That's not a state that any human deserves to live in. I have no interest in scaring people. So yes, I will help you paint the picture. I don't believe like so I believe in Canadians, I guess is my point. And I don't believe as a general rule, they want to repeat the sins of the past. I, I don't meet people who want to be racists, who want to be exclusionary. They just don't know how to change it. Right. Again, they're looking at something when I was talking about with the unconscious incompetence, right. They or even the conscious incompetence where they're now aware of the problem, but they really don't know what to do. I've shared the wall metaphor before that people like me are dancing on the wall, but the people touching the wall so want to be up on the wall. They want to be decision makers and they want to be implementing solutions, but they need information and once they have enough information, they can get up on the wall too. So we got to keep going. The alternative is not an option. Kind of reminds me of when I started my business and I believe I mentioned this in, in the podcast that I do with Millie. When I started my business, I was a single woman. I was renting an apartment, paying my Bills and failure was not an option because there was no one that was going to be able to pay my rent or my utilities. And yes, I had a fear of living in my car for the longest time. Like, I believe this can happen, but is it going to happen soon enough? And obviously it did now, 15 years later, but that's kind of how I feel about Canada and reconciliation. We will get it together. Failure is not an option. Could we do it sooner than later? Now, having said all that, I am also incredibly realistic, like I have to be to be able to do my work. I know often when it comes to indigenous and whatever non or non indigenous and whatever indigenous group they're working with, opposing values could be at play. I recognize that the things you value, you value. But we need people to recognize the things we value are just as important. Family humility. These are the things I don't worship the clock I worship. I value relationships. Don't worship relationships, but I value them. So though having those conversations builds the bridge, it's possible. I realize there's a whole bunch of stereotypes and misinformation out there about Indigenous people. And just in case you weren't aware, there's just as many stereotypes and misinformation about white people. And that's called unpacking. That's not. It doesn't involve hating the people that pass that information to us because someone passed it to them. But it's realizing we are now educated, intelligent adults and we can unpack the things that no longer serve us. Can we all agree the speedo doesn't look good on anyone? Okay. And like I said before, the fear of the future. I actually was told there was this one group operating in municipality that I was working with and one of their phrases that they like to use was it's not reconciliation, it's retribution. I have. There's so many things wrong with that. For one, it is again implying that the way non indigenous do things is the way we're going to do things. Don't project your garbage and your ugly on us. And it's not possible to like. Reparations might be a distinct possibility depending on what part of the damage we're talking about. But we want to get. I have zero interest in getting even. Vengeance is not a part of our indigenous teachings. Growing, learning, honesty, bravery, those are the things that we, we value. We want to work together. I, I'm not going to be around forever and I'm going to do this work as long as I can, but I'm not going to be around forever and I really want to leave it a better place than I found it and I would hope that there's a lot more people that think that way. So bottom line, I believe in Canada. I believe I have hope for the future. I see how many people are reaching out and want to work with me, who want to understand, who want to bring me into their businesses, their universities, their hospitals. They want me, their municipalities. They want to understand I am not going to condemn anyone for what they don't know. I just need them open to hearing what they don't know and I need them open to unlearning what they used to think was true. So I believe in Canada. I believe in reconciliation and I hope for all of those reasons and more you do too. So maybe if I could get a heck yeah in the comment section, that would totally make my day. Okay. Until tomorrow, I'm Sandy Boucher. I love you. Take care. Bye. Bye.