Step 3 Puzzle Pieces (A Day That Changed Everything)

Hello, you absolutely amazing person.

You.

Mishko Poggan on Que n Addition. My name is Sandy Bouget. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the Loon clan, a proud member of Seine River First Nation in Treaty 3 Territory in Northern Ontario. And if you're new here, for one, welcome. Secondly, today we are looking at step three of one of my original seminars that got turned into a video course that I'm now sharing with you from free of charge because this information could help so many people. On Monday, we looked at the four thank yous, how I start every workshop, seminar or speech. Yesterday, we looked at base teachings.

Today.

Well, if you've been on my channel for any length of time, you've heard me talk about puzzle pieces. Well, this is where it all started. This is the first time I talked about puzzle pieces. So let's talk about it in stage three of A Day that Changed Everything.

Welcome back to A Day that Changed Everything. Today we're looking at Video three, and we're going to be talking about one of my favorite topics, puzzle pieces. Now, before I get into that, once again, I just got to say kudos to you. If you're watching this, this is the third video that tells me so much about you. That means that you are committed to lifelong learning. You're committed to increasing your skills, to doing life better, to getting more confident, more comfortable, able to handle life's challenges. If only everyone felt the way you did, we would have so many less troubled people on this planet. So I just got to say, Chimigwech, huge thank you. Kudos to you for choosing to come out again today and to watch this video with me. I am truly enjoying our journey together. Now, by now you would know I am an Anishinaabe kwe. I am an Ojibwe woman. I was raised by absolutely amazing parents. I won six world 49 in the parent department. And I use all of my teachings in this seminar and in every seminar I give, every speech I deliver, I use the teachings that move me from poverty to success through domestic violence to a life that is safe, happy, to my empowered world. And that's what I'm hoping for you. That's what I'm going to be sharing with you over the duration of this course. Now, today, you're really going to. We're really going to get into that and you're going to learn about my past and really how that affected me. So first and foremost, I want to talk to you about my mom. My amazing, phenomenal, fantastic mom. And hang On a sec. I'm just going to put up a picture here of her so that you have visual. Okay, There she is. Awesome. I so love my mom and I miss her every single day. Now, my mom, I don't know if you're one of those people that like putting together puzzles. If you do, I can honestly say I don't understand you. I appreciate you and respect you. I just don't understand you. I am not one of those people. People. The idea of taking a perfectly good picture and cutting it into a thousand people pieces and then asking me to put it back together makes zero sense to me. But kudos to you if you're one of those people. My mom was definitely one of those people. And in the house I grew up in, somewhere in the house was a big sheet of plywood, usually on the freezer in the back room. And on it would be some puzzle, whatever she was working on in some stage of completion. And what used to blow me away, and maybe you do this too. What used to blow me away is that I don't ever remember her just standing there and deciding, I'm going to work on my puzzle now. Rather, what would happen as she was walking by to put the laundry in the machine, she'd and she would see a piece and add it to the puzzle. Or as she was passing by to tell us that it was time to come for dinner, she would notice another piece. One by one, the puzzle would get put together and then she couldn't wait to get on to the next one. Now, my mom was a master of metaphors, and I think I've mentioned this before, that my mom believed there was a teaching inside absolutely everything. If I haven't mentioned it in this video series, I' definitely mentioned it in others. So one of the metaphors she used a lot was the puzzle pieces metaphor. So there's two ways to look at this, both equally as important. First and foremost, your value. If you think about it, and I'm just going to reach in here and grab a couple of puzzle pieces now, do those look like they go together? Possibly. Maybe not. Not right. Like, wouldn't that freak out if they did fit? No, they don't. But they look like they kind of might belong to the same puzzle. You are a valuable piece in the puzzle that is your family, your community, this country, the world at this age and stage. My mom would say, that's why you were born now and not 100 years ago or 100 years in the future, because you're part of this puzzle. And You're a vital part of this puzzle. You've been put here on purpose. And that's why when I'm in seminar and I'm sharing that teaching with people, I actually give them a puzzle piece and I tell them to keep it in their pocket or in their wallet or in their change purse. So when they least expect it, they can grab and see this puzzle piece and be reminded I'm a piece of this puzzle. I'm valuable. But the other side, the other teaching is that you are made up of puzzle pieces. Now, I don't know about you, but for many, many years of my life, just like when you begin a puzzle, I had pieces that didn't go together. And I was often asking creator, why in the world did I need to meet that person or why did I need to have that experience? I can honestly say I was in my mid to late 40s before my puzzles started coming together and the pieces started to fit. I started to see how past experiences could be used in my present life to help people. For example, I'm a 10 year domestic abuse survivor now I go into shelters for abused women and I can share my story with them. And they know I'm not talking textbook theory, that I'm talking real life experience, that I know exactly what it's like to sit in that chair just like they are scared and overwhelmed. And that if I made it out, they can too. So I'd be willing to bet you've collected a whole bunch of puzzle pieces and that's what we're talking about today. Your puzzle pieces, what are they adding up to? Or are they adding up yet? And if they're not, that's okay. My mom would say, just get more pieces. If you don't know the answer to this question, sounds like you need more puzzle pieces, just keep going. Now I'm going to use my life as an example. I have many, many puzzle pieces. And that's why I keep this vase handy to remind me of that. I have many puzzle pieces that came together to create and gel into the life I enjoy. Now, first and foremost, my parents. And again, I'm going to try to find a picture here to include it. That's my amazing parents. So my mom, Anishinaabe Kwe. Our family bloodline is from Coochin First Nation. We're proud members of Seine River First Nation. And my dad was a Frenchman Straight from St. Jerome, Quebec to the day he died. It was, how you say in English. My parents didn't have a lot of money. I grew up poor. But I didn't even realize that till I was in my 20s because our home was filled with love and encouragement and support. I always knew my parents were going to be there and I always knew they were going to be there for me. So they became two huge examples and essential puzzle pieces in my puzzle now. Next. I was raised in a super tiny northern Ontario town of 4, 400 people. We had two stop signs and we were proud of it. Now, I don't know about you, but if you were raised in a small town, you learn pretty quickly to be real, to be authentic. You can't pretend you're all that in a bag of chips because every single time you walk down the street, the person you meet remembers if you were a brat in kindergarten or not. They know who your siblings are, they know who your parents are, and they probably remember every goofy thing you ever did. If there's one thing growing up in a small town taught me, it was how to get comfy with the human I am. So that's a valuable piece in my puzzle Now. Next, school. Now, I love school. I learned pretty quickly that I just. I'm a human sponge. Give a book, give me the chance to learn something. I am there. And I loved the validation of the school system. Write a paper, you get an A. Like constant feedback. Wouldn't it be awesome if life gave us those constant feedback? Often we don't know whether we're doing the right thing or not. Parenting comes to mind. Do a lot of praying and just hope it works out. But school wasn't like that. School taught me that I was in control of how much I wanted to learn. They taught me certain topics, but I could go home and grab a book off my mom's shelf or I could head to the library. Now you can go on the Internet and learn whatever you want. If you don't understand something, you totally have the ability to learn about it. And that's a pretty exciting option. Now, life continued on. I'm now an adult. And two of the most amazing puzzle pieces in my puzzle are my children. My children are now in their 30s, and I swear they have been my greatest teachers. My daughter is the eldest. My son is two years behind. Totally different personalities, totally different outlooks on life. But they have been an essential piece of my puzzle. They were the reason I kept going on so many days when I would have just given up if it was just me. And of course, now that my daughter has married an amazing young man, I have two fantastic grandchildren that remind me how valuable I am. And that I need to stop and just play sometime. I love their fascination for the world, and I am truly enjoying getting to know the humans that they are now. We add to our puzzle pieces throughout our life. We add friends into that puzzle. Family members come and go, and we get to choose how big and important a puzzle piece each person is going to be. The reality is, some of our puzzle pieces we choose. We choose to take that job. We choose to go to school. We choose that person as a friend. We choose that person as a partner. Some of the puzzle pieces I was gifted. I didn't realize that that boss at work was going to turn into an amazing mentor. I didn't realize that moving to that small town was going to enrich me in couldn't even imagine. And I'm certain there's examples you could think of in your future. And truth be told, like everyone else, there were puzzle pieces I received that I chose to discard later in life. There was a time in my life where my partner was an active alcoholic. And truth be told, that was our relationship. A lot of alcohol was consumed. When that relationship was over, I got the chance to look at, do I want this in my life? Is this a puzzle piece that works for me? And I chose that it didn't. So I discarded that puzzle piece. I've discarded unhealthy eating habits. I've discarded. Well, I used to have the habit of not eating when I was a young woman, and that's just a horrible habit to. To. And that one needs to be discarded. And I'm certain you can think of a hundred different examples of things you've discarded. And of course, on the other side of that coin, there are so many things that are now cherished memories. I am 56 years old, and I have so many beautiful friends that are no longer with us. They're still a valuable piece in my puzzle. Their memory doesn't fade even though they're no longer with us. You just hang on tight. My parents. My mom comes with me to every seminar, and my dad is usually there too. Again, just because they've passed on doesn't mean I lose those puzzle pieces like you. My puzzle pieces got me here. Your puzzle pieces got you to wherever you are. My puzzle pieces took me from that small town to a. A very young age, to a divorce at a young age, through domestic violence, through poverty, through alcohol abuse, to achieving my career goals, to starting my own business, to living here, living and loving my life. So what have your puzzle pieces added up to? And I Guess that's the stage we're at now. I have some questions for you. So first off, what are your puzzle pieces? Who has added who is part of your puzzle? Did you come from a small town? Your parents? Did your grandparents play a huge role? I didn't have grandparents, but maybe you did. Who is your best friend? Do you have siblings? Are they part of your puzzle? Once you decide who your puzzle pieces are, look at each and ask if they serve you. Now, I'm not talking about these people being servants to you. That's not what I'm talking about. But is having that person in your world a positive? Are they helping you to be the person you want to be? Are they helping you achieve your dreams? Are they helping you to get healthier or more educated or whatever it is you're striving to do? Does that person serve you? Not in a judging way, but in a do they help you? Kind of way. Did your puzzle pieces help you? What did they help you get through? I know you've had challenges. I've never met a human being that hasn't. So what puzzle pieces helped you through what challenge? And the worksheet, the way it's laid out is going to make it way easy for you to be able to follow that path and answer those questions. Ask yourself which puzzle pieces you're going to hang onto for dear life and determine whether there's some you might want to discard. And don't beat yourself up if that's the case. I think that's an ongoing decision we have to make. I am constantly looking at my puzzle pieces and realizing maybe that fit in an earlier version of me, but it doesn't fit in the puzzle I have now. And that's okay. It's not like you got to rent a billboard. You no longer fit. In my world, we can consciously choose. I still have friends from my past that I spend time with. I'm not going to spend huge amounts of time with them. I'm not going to let them be that big of an influence. But it doesn't mean I have to pretend I never knew them. That's not what this is about. It is never about judgment, but it is about consciously analyzing and looking at the puzzle pieces that are making up your puzzle. Is that truly the puzzle you want to end up with? This is your life. You choose your puzzle pieces. You choose your destiny. The future is not a surprise. It's the result of the seeds you plant today. It's a result of the puzzle pieces you choose. So which ones are you going to choose? So once again, those are huge, huge questions. And the reality is, if you want to have confidence and high self esteem, then you start consciously building your life. And by doing that, you start feeling better about your life and start feeling better about the human you are. So this is an incredibly personal exercise. You don't need to share it with anyone. But for your sake and the sake of the future, please do the exercise. I know that was a lot and it was a very deep conversation, but self esteem and confidence, those are deep topics. Please remember, I believe in you. I don't care how many puzzle pieces you have to discard. I believe you have the ability to do it. I believe in you. And hopefully very, very soon you will start believing in YouTube. Until next time. I love you. Talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.