Sandi L Boucher (Red Thunderbolt, Seine River First Nation) teaches about honoring your limits while running an intensive daily training. She talks about accepting unfinished tasks, a childhood story that reframes expectations, and practicing self-kindness, especially during COVID.
Chapters
Foreign. Hi, everybody. My name is Sandy Boucher. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the loon clan, a proud member of Seine River First Nation in Northern Ontario. And I'm here again with this week's Tuesday teaching. Well, me and Oreo are here again, and that's on purpose because, you see, this week and next week, I'm actually helping out a local agency facilitating a training course. It's from 8:30 in the morning to 4:30 every single day. And anyone who's ever tried to facilitate a group and try to keep them engaged and excited and interested and asking questions for that long, for that many days in a row, well, I think you can understand why I'm tired, which is why hair is pulled up. And I'm just hanging out here, just me and my cat. Because this week's teaching is about getting really super comfy with what you can do and what you can't. The reality is I come home and it takes everything I've got just to try to put together a healthy meal. Tried tonight, I had to put out the garbage and put out recycling and of course that's got to be sorted first. And all of that sounds like no big deal except when it's added on the top of everything else. And I know you can relate. We all think we can go do that full day at the office or wherever we are and then come home and do a whole bunch of other stuff. And you know what? I just don't play by those rules anymore. I am being really kind myself this week. I want to make sure I give absolutely everything I can to my participants. And if that means the house isn't as organized as it should be, or normally is, I'm okay with that because I know the people that love me and care about me will understand. It actually reminds me of a time when my kids were little. They were just under 2 and 4 when I became a single mom. And I went to school, went to school, went to work almost full time to make sure I could feed them and provide for them. There were so many times that I felt so guilty because the laundry wasn't done or, or I didn't seem to be providing the great meals that my mom used to provide. And my house was never as clean as her house was. Well, one day I mentioned that to her and she just stopped dead in her tracks and looked at me and said, I sit back and wonder how you do what you did, what you do on a regular basis. And for her to hear from me that I was wondering how she did it. She was really surprised. It was then my mom reminded me that she was a stay at home mom and that while we were in school is when she did her cooking and the big meals and the laundry and the cleaning. She didn't understand how I was a single parent of a two and four year old working full time and still able to manage. Hearing that from my mom meant everything to me. She didn't think I was doing a bad job at all. And I needed to hear that. Today I'm inviting you to be the person who says it. If you need to hear it, then say it for yourself. This little fur ball needs some loving, some TFC and some time with me. And you know what? I am happy to give it because she's a great thrill to come home to. So that's my message for this week. Just do what you can. Especially in this time of COVID when stress is through through the roof and everyone's trying to act like it's normal. Working from home with all the stresses and things that require your attention at home isn't the same as working from the office. Do what you can and give yourself permission to stop at that point. I know I'm spending the rest of the evening relaxing so that I can again do my best for my students tomorrow. But tonight it's me and Oreo until next week. I love you. Talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.
