YouTube video by Sandi L Boucher (Red Thunderbolt) advising whom to consult for reconciliation guidance. She argues non-Indigenous people—especially white politicians and emotion-averse academics—are poor guides, and elevates Indigenous women who survived domestic violence as knowledgeable guides because of their lived experience with reconciliation and co-parenting after harm.
Chapters
Foreign. Hello everybody. It's Andy Boucher here once again. I'm Red Thunderbolt, woman of the Loon clan, a proud member of Seine River First Nation in Treaty 3 Territory in Northern Ontario. And I'm here with yet another week of why videos, giving you the behind the scenes story of my popular daily blog posts. And I gotta admit, I am loving doing these videos because reconciliation is a journey and it's a journey best walked together. Non indigenous trying to walk the reconciliation journey and only touching basic with indigenous every now and then you are walking on very shaky grounds. Doesn't it make more sense to walk side by side with us so you can ask questions questions and comment on things you see. Imagine the two of us walking down a bush path together. We can comment on the beautiful birds and the sunlight and when you point out an interesting plant, I could share with you the history and the teachings and maybe even the medicinal value of that plant. That's walking together. That's how we get to reconciliation. So this week I'm actually shooting all the why videos at the same time. You're going to notice I'm wearing the same thing. Just makes it easier for me to schedule them and get them out to you. But you're going to want to watch these this week is there's a lot of revelations happening. I guess that's just the chapter I'm on now. So let's start with this week's videos now on Monday, May 29, talking about reconciliation, I really focused in on who you should be asking for guidance. And I guess the easiest way to do that is who you shouldn't be asking for guidance. I'm going to get really red thunderbolt woman, lightning bolt blunt here. You shouldn't be asking white politicians because how would they know what indigenous what we need to reconcile? They could guess. They could tell you what they think we should ask for, which doesn't even matter. Imagine getting in an argument with your partner and you're going to decide what they need to reconcile after this argument. That is never going to work. It doesn't work personally, it's not going to work nationally. The other ones like so non indigenous is a bad idea to ask anyways. They're not the hurt party. They should practice some humility and be listening, not offering suggestions. Secondly, the ones you really got to be aware or careful around be aware they're out there and trying to stay away from them are and I'm going to use a really broad term here and I'm talking about I used to call Them, the academics. And I realize that's not exactly accurate. I'm talking about the people that are really comfortable with stuff, statistics and intent and goals, as long as you don't bring any emotion into it. If the person you're turning to for guidance and reconciliation is not talking about emotions and hurt and pain, they are not a guide because you can't take the pain out of reconciliation in the same way. Again, use the analogy, an argument with your partner. They got hurt emotions, they feel the pain. You can't logically just try to address this without acknowledging that same thing. With indigenous people, we have the right to hurt. We have the right to take the time to heal, whatever length of time that is, especially since the attacks still keep happening. So that's who not to ask. But you know who you should ask. And I've been saying this for years and it's just not getting out there. So please share this and or the blog post or both with everyone you can. You know who's an expert on what it takes to reconcile with someone who has inflicted incredible harm on you. Indigenous women who have survived domestic violence because we've had to reconcile with our exes to help us raise our kids. We've had to figure out co parenting with someone who has caused us physical, emotional, spiritual, financial harm. We know what we're asking when we ask people to take part in reconciliation. We know how hard it is on indigenous people to do that, especially if they haven't had a chance to heal. And we know how uncomfortable it is for non indigenous people because we've seen how uncomfortable people get around us when we want to talk about our healing. And yes, for the record, I am a domestic abuse survivor, an indigenous woman who has survived sex, not sexual abuse, domestic violence. So there you have it. Be careful who you're talking to. Be careful who you're asking for guidance. If you're asking someone just because they're comfortable to talk to, maybe that's because they're more like you and not necessarily because they have the guidance that you need. So you got to look at that. You got to be careful if we're actually going to get down this path towards reconciliation. I know that's what you want. That's why you're here. So let's do this right. How's that for a blog post to start the week off with. Remember, share this video let's get the information out there. I love you. Take care. Bye Bye.
