Bouncers enforce bizarre rules at a club entrance, rejecting trainers, demanding plimsolls, and insisting patrons stand in the road instead of the pavement. The escalating confrontation with drunk customers reveals absurd security theater and the tension between staff and non-compliant guests.
Chapters
Hey guys. Yes, mate, can I help you? Just coming in for a drink with a friend. You're gonna need to step back off the pavement, mate, please. Okay, where do you want me to stand? Over there in the road. Why? Health and safety. Oh, because standing in the middle of the road's very safe, isn't it? Don't need sarcasm in here.
Can I come in? Of course you can. Have a good one, have a good night.
Yes, mate. Can I help you? What is this? You, you were you, you were the guys at the pub. You ain't coming in with them trainers. They're not trainers. They're plimsolls.
It's ain't a gym. It's a club.
All right, boys. All right then. Here you go. Wait, you've had one too many, mate. Babe, as soon as you get this message, just call me back immediately. How you doing, boys? All right? Good to see you.
Who the fuck are they? But this is my house.
I think someone's been sick on a sofa, Gary.
Sick on my shingle! What is going on here?
Oh babe, thank God, thank God. Everything's fine, everything's fine, everything's absolutely Fine, yeah. Oh, it's so good to see you. If that wasn't weird enough, then they were at my house. I literally thought I was going completely mental. Thank God it's over.
