A negotiator reflects on mistakes rooted in false assumptions about what's common sense across cultures. The only fix: own it completely, correct the story, and address it directly. Deception destroys trust; transparency can save the relationship.
Chapters
I've had so many missteps and errors in my life negotiating, I can't even count them. And I still do, because sometimes we do things that we think are common sense, and in other cultures it's not common sense. People think differently. So I keep making mistakes all the time, but the one thing for sure you have to do is be accountable for your mistake. If you lie to yourself, lie to your people, lie to the other side, nobody's going to trust you at all. But if you're accountable, you admit your mistake and say, listen, I did this wrong, I shouldn't have said this, this is what I meant, and deal with it right up front, hopefully you can fix the problem. It's never going to fix it So.