Energy Vampires: Healing from the People Who Leave You Drained

Welcome to the Trigger and the Truth podcast. I'm your host Tina White, and this is the space where we take a deep dive into the complexities of relationships— romantic, family, friendships, workplace dynamics, and of course entrepreneurship— and how they intertwine with our mental health and wellness. As a dedicated Tina White, mental health advocate. We don't just have conversations. We lean into the hard truths, peel back the layers, and journey together toward understanding, closure, and personal growth. More than ever, we're on a collective mission to find peace, clarity, and healing. This is your safe space to explore the moments that shaped you, discover your triggers, uncover the truths, and find the healing you deserve. So whether you're searching for solace, insight, or a fresh perspective, you're in the right place. If this is your first time tuning in, welcome to the conversation. I'd love for you to like, share, and pass this along to someone who might need some encouragement or insight. Now let's dive into today's episode and start this journey into self-discovery and wellness together. Welcome to the Triggering the Truth podcast. I'm your host Tina White. And so on today's episode, we are going to be discussing energy vampires and what and who they are. So this is a topic— again, I've been through it. This is a personal story with someone who I was in a long-term relationship with them years ago. This is not anything current. This is— this was— this was within the last 5 years, right? On today's episode, we're tackling energy vampires and those who leave you emotionally, mentally, and physically depleted. There's nothing worse than feeling depleted. So there was a time I was in a relationship with a man who, over time, he revealed himself to be incredibly manipulative. Like, now Now, I didn't see it at first. You can call me naive, but it is what it is. But it crept in slowly. But as the relationship went on, I started to feel different. And I'm talking about physically, like I felt drained and exhausted. So every time he came around, it was like a dark cloud followed him. The best way I can describe it is this. So imagine what it's like to be a vacuum-sealed bag. You know, the vacuum-sealed luggage bags? Airtight. All the air is sucked out of it. So that's how I felt. I felt like all the air and the energy and my light was sucked out of me. And that's how it felt whenever he was near me. Now, this did— this didn't happen in the beginning. It happened after about 2 years of dating. After about 2 years, it's like things switched. He just turned into a different person. I saw him differently. I felt differently. And his energy was so overpowering that that it seemed like it completely smothered my own energy.

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It wasn't just a mental thing because, again, he was very manipulative. It was physical. And the reason why I wanted to share this story is because there was this one time after waking up one morning, he stayed over, right? So he had his arms wrapped around me, and I felt heavy. And I'm talking about my body was drenched in sweat. My mind was foggy. When I tried to move to get up to go to the bathroom, It was like I weighed 500 pounds. I will never ever forget this moment because I've never felt anything like that before. I felt paralyzed, like how you— you know, I don't know if you guys are familiar with the term the devil riding your back, but after my mom died years ago, I felt like that one time before. And I was fully awake, and I was fully aware, but I could not move. I felt paralyzed. And my eyes were open, and I just felt— I just saw this being that didn't look real. It looked fake. It looked like it was a simulation, like I was in a dream, but I wasn't in a dream. And after a while, I was able to get up, and that never happened again, right? But I always remember it. This situation with my ex, it was like I could not move. I couldn't think clearly, and it was like his energy had drained every ounce of every ounce of vitality out of me. Now, it was that moment. It was a wake-up call. I realized I couldn't keep living like this. I could not keep waking up every day feeling like a shell of myself. On top of the fact that I am anemic, like, I have to take iron pills, and I've been anemic since I'm 14. This is not a new thing. So that feeling is the worst. Like, if you're anemic and you have low iron, it doesn't even matter how long you've been dealing with it. It's a good feeling. Now, I do a lot of things to try to combat it. I, I eat better, I take my supplements, but there's times where I just feel like I'm not getting out the bed, right? So to attribute that same feeling with a person who is just physically near you or close to you or touching you, it was mind-blowing for me because I'm like I need to break free. I have to reclaim my energy, my peace, and my sense of self. Again, it wasn't just the physical part, it was him trying to manipulate me. He would always be in my face lying. He put it— I can't even go into the details because there's still a restraining order that's still alive, but it was a lot. So I ended the relationship. And even though it wasn't easy, the moment I did, and I mean the moment, like the next day, I felt something shift. It was like my body and my mind started to come back to life. And that is real talk.

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So who are these energy vampires, you ask, right? Energy vampires are individuals who drain your emotional, mental, and physical energy. It's that simple. They often leave you feeling drained and exhausted, anxious, stressed out, and this is after every interaction. Now you have people who have the exact opposite effect on you, and those are the people who I gravitate towards. But some of the traits of the energy vampires include excessive neediness, like pretending like I can't live without you, but the moment, you know, you're off at work or you're off doing something, they're in somebody else's face professing the same thing to them. We'll talk about that at another time. The lack of accountability for their actions. Very negative, always pessimistic. It's like, what? And then they cross boundaries. They just cross boundaries constantly. They ignore your emotional limits. Like, you're like, listen, can you just step onto the side right now? And they don't care. They just need to be in control of the situation. Obviously, in the beginning it was great. I mean, we went on trips. We went to Turks and Caicos for my birthday. We did all kinds of stuff, all kinds of travel— DR, Cancún, anything you could think of, all of the nice fun stuff. That I like to do, shopping, and whatever it is that I wanted, I was able to get, right? And then it turned into a complete shit show, and I just could not— there was no amount of trips and shopping and marriage proposals that was ever going to keep me in that situation. And he was so insincere, and nothing allowed me to be comfortable with him, right? Nothing. And I look back and I'm like, there's no way that I'm ever going to be able to rationalize staying in this situation because physically I could not deal with it. Now mind you, the energy vampires are not always a romantic partner. It could be a friend, it could be a family member, it could be at work. And these are real things. It's— they come in all forms. Coworkers, family members, they drain your energy and they disrupt your peace. So they leave you feeling exhausted. But always remember, you have the power to protect yourself and you have to recognize the signs because they are there blinking. And you have to set firm boundaries and prioritize your, your well-being, right? So At the end of the day, that's what I had to do. Like, you don't owe anyone unlimited access to your energy, especially if they're draining you. So you have to stay grounded, stay focused, and most importantly, stay true to yourself. Thank you so much for spending time with me today on The Trigger and the Truth. Remember, it's all about about uncovering those triggers, finding the truth, and building stronger, healthier relationships for ourselves and with the people around us. If today's episode resonated with you, I'd love it if you'd like, share, and send it to someone who might benefit. Together, we're making mental health and wellness a priority. And always remember, never let your emotions supersede your intelligence. Take care of yourself, be kind to your mind, and until next time, let's keep uncovering truths, one heartfelt conversation at a time.