Wisdom for Life: Embracing Correction and Self-Control in Christ

Hey, this is Tim Pratt Jr. and I want to welcome you to the Student of Life podcast. Listen, we're going to get into so many transferable truths throughout the content of these episodes that I believe God is going to use to help you apply, because he's going to reveal what's already been there the entire time. Enjoy.

Hey yo, what's up? This your host Tim Pratt Jr. and I am late this week, like I'm late this week. This should have been dropped this past Monday, but I actually had the opportunity to preach this message this past Sunday, and I was wrestling with it. I said, man, I'm going to just— it's no secret this is season 4, man. Just kind of like when you're watching your favorite show out there and sometimes it goes away for a week or two, then it comes back. That's kind of how I roll. Like, it is no secret, but typically I try to pre-record, do a lot of pre-recording, but I didn't this time. Then I was going to put something out there, leadership-driven, and And I was like, no, I just felt like I was led to really give you a condensed version of what I preached Sunday. So I'm going to go through this. I just kind of have a little bit of my notes from Sunday where I believe God led me to talk about wisdom for life. Wisdom for life, and the subject was embracing correction and self-control in Christ. Now, if you're not a Christian, that's cool. I think that you still going to love it because we're going to be just really focusing on the book of Proverbs. I love the book of Proverbs. One of the things I'm practicing, I'm picking back up that I used to have some years ago, is just reading a proverb a day, spending time. Like, if I can't find time— well, not find— but if I can't make the time, have the necessary discipline to just read a chapter a day, in my opinion, then something is seriously wrong. And of course, I typically study more than that. Sometimes I do miss a day. But I pray and I study things and read things or listen to the Bible. But it's— I, for the most part, I engage with content, and I don't want to call the Bible just content, but I do engage with content in the Bible just about every day, um, if not every day. Seriously, for real. Uh, but also too, there's a difference versus deeply studying and just, you know, reading and things like that. So nevertheless, that's not about this episode, but, um, I do want to jump straight into it. And I'm just going to read Proverbs 1, and then I promise you this will be the most reading because I want to set the stage for the context of this episode, Wisdom for Life. But before, you know, I dive into it, you know, one thing I just want us to understand is that we live in a generation, you know, like with technology, AI, people been Googling things for God knows how long. And so we have no shortage of knowledge. We don't— I don't believe we have a knowledge problem, but I do believe we have a wisdom problem. However, the thing is, you can't— I don't know where I— I can't remember where I heard this from, but I totally agree with it. You can have knowledge without wisdom. That's true. You could be the most knowledgeable person out there, but a lack of wisdom— in other words, a lack of knowing how to apply that knowledge in a wise way. However, you cannot have wisdom without knowledge. So what am I saying? We should be postured to learn, to learn, strive to learn the right things. Wisdom is expensive. This is why, like, I'm an avid reader through actually the physical books, uh, ebooks, audiobooks. I love podcasts, I love watching YouTube, but, but all of it is relevant. Like, typically my areas are the Bible, uh, trusted voices, uh, same thing with me. Like, I can, I can be wrong too, so I always encourage you to dig into the word, fact check, because I, I could be wrong and I can stand corrected. That's what this episode is all about. But But nevertheless, it's like I do have trusted voices and like that I have spent time vetting, and I'm like, I, I really— those voices have not yet steered me wrong. It might be a disagreement, but however, those voices have not steered me wrong. And so most of the time, like I said, I'm focused on the Bible, I'm focusing on, um, like, you know, developmental stuff and leadership. Like, those are my areas that I love to study, and it's so broad. So, uh, this one here, Proverbs 1, talks about— I'm not gonna— Proverbs 1:2-6, but I wanted to zone in on 5. Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance. Guidance. And then I'm gonna just read verse 6. To understand a proverb and saying the words of the wise and their riddles. In other words, I strive to live a posture life of always learning. Just like I said, like now, this is not in the context of what I believe in Timothy, where it talks about those that are always learning and never come into the knowledge of truth, the full knowledge of truth. That, that is not this. I think that's a different context and things. It's just based like people that are always learning, learning, learning, learning, but they can't come to the realization that, hey, this is the truth. Like, you won't believe the truth right in front of you. You won't believe in that context the word of God because you think you always have to learn something outside of to discredit it. That's again, that's, that's just— I haven't deeply studied that passage, or I might have, but I just don't remember. But I believe vaguely like that's essentially what that was saying. This is not the same is what this Proverbs is saying. This proverb is saying, in other words, like, I say, hey, why do I keep going to church? Why do I keep hearing the word of God? Why do I keep studying my Bible? Like, I never, for the most part, say, oh, I've read the Bible 3 or 4 times, there's no need for me to read it anymore. Oh, I read that leadership book 5 or 6 times, there's no need. No, I revisit these books a lot. Why? Because of the renewing of the mind, because of the principle, because I want to make sure that I'm consistently applying it. I believe that the word of God is living. However, I do— I'm not, I'm not going to go as far as say the books are living, uh, because it's not the inspired word of God. But I do think books, we tend to see them different as we continue to progress. Like, when I read, I don't just read to just be reading. Like, I'm reading and filing things, saying, well, man, I really don't understand this, but it's just something about this. And I file it. I have a system. And then I go back and I revisit. I might pair with other things. Like, this takes work. It's sharpening the saw. And not— this is one of the things that helps me become very, very effective at what I do, because I'm embracing that consistent correction and helping me be self-controlled. So things that it could possibly take me 10, uh, 10 hours to do, I probably can do it at 45, because I've just been this consistent habit of just sharpening the saw. And not just in books, but sitting with people, talking to people, because I just believe that I can learn anything. I can learn something from a 10-year-old, I can learn something from a 5-year-old. Like, it's just a posture of always learning so I can increase and understand and just obtain this guidance because I don't have to make the same mistakes. I'm willing to listen, I'm willing to subject myself to someone else that is more skilled, that is more knowledgeable, has a lot more wisdom in that area than me, in me, so I can just, just be better, just more mature. And so that's what I believe that we have to understand when it comes to wisdom, because it's never going to go out of style. But wisdom is expensive. It is. Oh Lord, help me. Wisdom is expensive. Like, it is. I mean, sometimes when people go out and make a $50,000, $60,000, $70,000 mistake, I mean, it's like, okay, you can either make that mistake and just not care and go make it again, if not even greater, or you can say, okay, what did we learn from this? It was a very expensive, uh, mistake or whatever, but what did we learn from this so we can be better? So we can be more mature. And so that's, that's kind of that, that context. But one of the things I love about Proverbs is that it stresses that wisdom is not just limited to this elite class of people, but it's, it's really truly accessible to anybody willing to seek it. And James has told us that. James has told us that clear as day in the Bible that, you know, if anyone lack wisdom, he should ask. Now, how is God going to get that wisdom to us, it's going to be various ways. It could be through his word, it could be through, um, through a multitude of counselors, and it could be through his creation. It could be through life, you know, him allowing us to go through things, say, wow, okay, this is how he can pair it however he chooses to pair it. But I will say, start with the word of God. Start with the word of God and the multitude of counselors and just observation of God's creation. But the ultimate source of wisdom is God himself. Like, it all belongs to him. So now that we're kind of getting to the heart of this content, I'm gonna go through these kind of quickly. I'm not gonna spend as much time on them probably as I spent time preaching, because this would be— I think I was up there about 50 minutes, maybe 55, but this was a pretty lengthy message. But I'm not gonna hold you that long, so I'm not gonna go as in-depth as I was when I was preaching. Uh, but the first one was Proverbs 12:1, and this is love correction. We have to love correction. Matter of fact, let's do this. This is a point episode, so we can keep this 5 of them. Love correction. Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid. He who hates reproof is stupid. So in other words, if we hate correction, we're stupid because we're saying we don't want to be corrected. Like, and, and this generation, like, oh my God, like, it's like people are defensive, like, when it comes to correction. Hey, let me correct that. Let me refine that. And, you know, then I see people like, if we've been— if you've been married 15, 20, 30 years, 25 years, or whatever you've been doing in a role, yes, you probably have learned a lot. But I'ma also say this, and I can't remember again who coined this phrase, but you can have one year of experience multiple times because you never stood correction. You kept doing it your way, and you thought your way was the best. Uh, your marriage, like, you're tolerating each other because you never was— neither one of you is willing to— or you particular, whoever, and it could be them, but never willing to go to therapy, go to a counselor, go invest in your marriage. So now it's like, yeah, you're floating this banner, we've been married 30 years, 35 years, 40 years, but it's like you have that same year repeated 35, 40 times. And so really, truthfully, you don't need to be giving anybody any advice because you don't— you're not full of wisdom. You've been— you probably have a lot of knowledge but not wisdom. And so you can't help anyone because you didn't embrace correction. You don't love correction. Every time I read, every time I open myself up to my Bible, every time I open my— like, every day I'm— it's like, man, wow, God, thank you for your grace and mercy. This is why I strive to have a posture of humility, because I'm like, I didn't know that. But a lot of times with people, um, that don't love correction, what I've noticed is that they're very insecure and they don't have a firm foundation. Particularly I don't feel like they have a firm foundation in Christ. However, I know everybody that rock with this podcast might say, well, I don't really even believe in that anyway. It doesn't change the fact that you might be just insecure. And so you, you, you make yourself bigger than you are. Like, it's— you, you have to inflate your ego. And a wise person, truthfully, like, they love correction. They're not trying to be anything that they're not. They don't overcome in and make theirself appear bigger than they are. They like, man, no, I'm comfortable in who I am. I have a solid foundation in life. I want to be corrected. And, and look, let me tell you something, everybody doesn't correct with a posture of love. Some people are some harsh and tough people. But this is what I have learned. I will tell people, hey, you can watch your delivery, you can watch your tone. Not that I'm being ultra sensitive, but at the same time— and sometimes I don't do it, sometimes just like, you know what, that was a little rough how they delivered, they might need to grow in that area. But I don't want to lose sight of what they say. I have dealt with this in the church. I have dealt with this in the marketplace. I have dealt with it from coaches that I've had. I'm not this soft person that you have to coddle. Do I want you to talk to me like— for the most part, as long as you're talking to me like I'm a grown man, especially now. Like, when I was younger, it wasn't so much that I can do about it, but now, hey, I'm like, just minimum, like, you're gonna talk to me with some respect. But at the same time, if you're very stern, if you're very firm, is there really an attitude? Or maybe that you just might be a firm person, and that's okay. Because what we do is like, well, they hurt my feelings, and it's like now I can't even focus on the correction because I'm so focused on how it was delivered. And so I just believe we need to have a responsibility to say, okay, yeah, it sucked, that hurt, but I'm going to embrace that correction. And then another thing before I move on, and I'm talking faster, typically I try to slow down, but I want to cover a lot of ground here, so you can put it on 0.75 or whatever if you need to slow it down. But another thing is there are people in my life that if I do something, if I post something, they have a right to say, hey, pick up the phone, call me, hey, take that down. That wasn't cool. Uh, you might have been trying to be funny, you might take that down, let's talk about it. I'm not gonna be like, will it hurt? Yeah, I'm like, dang, did I— what did I miss? Oh my God, what? Because I respect them. But at the same time, they don't have to give me a reason why. They don't. Now, most of the people like that, they're going to talk and explain it, but I have a— like I said, enough respect that I'm like, man, let me, let me just take it down because I can submit myself to that because there might be covering me, there might be something I don't understand. And, and most of the time, like I say, those people, they are going to take the time to explain it because they don't want me to make it— hey, this is why I said this, because you might be not— you might not be considering this. But I'm not going to be like, well, I'm not taking nothing down to you. No, I Man, I've given them their right in that space. So now they get the abuse and whatever, just trying to suck, you know, whatever, then yeah, we're gonna have to have a conversation, uh, because you do have to be careful of that. And I just feel led to say that because sometimes people just manipulate you or whatever and try to sun you or whatever, all that type of stuff. But this is what I will say before we move on: if your ego makes others hesitant to correct you, it's going to be a toxic dynamic. Meaning that people are just going to be like, I don't even want to talk to them, I don't want to correct them because they're so defensive, they're so insecure. So you know what, I'm going just let them stay over there in their bubble. They don't really love correction, I'm not going to say anything. If your spouse can't correct you, if your spouse can't say anything to you, uh, if you're a leader, if, if, if, if one of your subordinate— like, if people can't say anything to you, uh, I always tell people, challenging, correcting, uh, what's the word, help me, Praise in public, challenge in private. Now sometimes you do have to challenge people publicly, but I will say the more sensitive the subject is, challenge in private. Just give people that respect, because a lot of times, uh, with correction, sometimes people are just embarrassed. And it's more so about, instead of receiving a correction, it's like, what are people thinking about me in this moment? Like, they can't fully embrace it. And so that's why I kind of always err on the side of caution unless somebody is just tripping. Publicly, and it's like, okay bro, you, you doing this. Um, so anywho, I'm not going to really go into the example about an athlete, but most of the time I will say this is what makes people great when they're willing to be coached. Like, an athlete does not work on the team and be like, oh, I don't need to be coached. No matter how great they are, they're there to be coached. Uh, this next one, skill and anointing. Now let me speed it up some. So Proverbs 22, uh, 29: Do you see a man skillful in his work He will stand before kings. He will not stand before obscure men. Look, it's very important to be anointed. It's very important to be called. Yes, we need those from God. Like I was giving an example, if God called me to preach and teach the gospel at 17 and I'm almost 35, I'm just as anointed that when he called me that I am now. The question is, have I been developing? Have I been putting in the work? Have I been doing the work to develop in the skill of communication uh, the skill of leadership, the skill of wordplay, and these type of things. Not to just be an excellent communicator and not live it and not have the approval of God, but we got to stop putting things against one another. I should be skilled and anointed. Like, I'm just as anointed I was 17 as I am now. So have I developed? Because it's essential. Because, because this is the thing, many people claim to be called by God and all this type of stuff, and a lot of times, especially in the local church, we just elevate them. We just, we just elevate them and we move them up, and it's no, no skill, no skill. This is why we have this discrepancy when a lot of times when it comes to in the body of Christ, and we even sit in the secular, oh, like, they're, they, they just, there's just something about them, they're charismatic and this type of stuff, and they'd have no skill, and we throw them into a position and they weren't even qualified for it because the lack of skill there. So growth isn't about becoming more anointed, it's about becoming more skilled in what God has given us. And one of the examples I, I used, um, in this context is that— Lord help me— uh, if, if I was dealing with someone that was a faith-based person, and I'm gonna just say that in this context they were flying a plane, they said, 'I was called to fly planes, God anointed me, it's just something about my ability to fly planes.' and they have not been through no rigorous training, they have not submitted themselves, haven't done any hours, really been just looking at YouTube videos, versus the person that don't believe in God as an atheist. Of course, like I say, I would love to— the faith-based person, but give me the person that don't believe but has been submitting, has spent a lot of time under people and have passed exams and gotten whatever, God know what, to, to succeed in that industry. That's what I want. I want the person that I, that I know that has been developed. Again, I would love the faith-based person with the skill, uh, the anointing and skill, but I'm always going to err on the side of caution of just a skilled person versus somebody that's anointed that won't develop in their skill. That's what I'm trying to say. Um, so we want both, we want both. This is a faith-based podcast, and a lot of times, like I said, the problem is— a matter of fact, let me read this note. Um, I— again, I forgot where this came from. Oh, I'm doing bad in the area today. But it's like, too many uninformed leaders are being uh, emulated in the church, meaning roles like basically promoted. Uh, no other significant area of human life would allow it. Could you imagine if the medical profession allowed doctors to practice based simply on passion but not adequate formation and training? What is any different when it comes to the body? Really, we can apply that anywhere because, like I say, even in secular, sometimes people get promoted just because of friends, because I get along with people, I have all the Uh, I know how to say the right things in the right relationships. And it's like, but you're— you don't have any— again, don't have any skill in that area. So that's, that's just an area we need to tighten up on, I just believe, especially as believers. Uh, keeping it paced, Proverbs 25:28, self-control. A man without self-control is likely a city broken into itself and left without walls. I'm gonna read that again. A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls. Listen here, and I need to say this at this mark. You don't get nothing else. If you have a zeal to preach and teach the gospel, I know we live in things— well, I'm a man, or you know, I'm a woman, uh, and I'm human and all that type of stuff, and that's so true. But also too, if you have a zeal to preach real good and you can't keep your you-know-what in your pants, you can't keep your box closed, sit your butt down and get help. Because I don't see how people can have that level of self-control, uh, that level of zeal, but you don't have the same zeal to be self-controlled. Again, I know that we all have, uh, different struggles and walks of life and all of that stuff, but what I am saying, that is not an excuse to sit down and get help because you're not even truly, truthfully convinced. Because there's a difference, and I'm really tired of this in this society of, well, man, you— I have struggles just like you. And that's true, but you can ask my pastor. You could ask my pastor in this context. You can even ask my, my father-in-law, people, men of God that have submitted myself to, women of God that I've submitted myself to. I will give them context if they need it. You could call up my therapist. And I— and it's not that I have done anything, but I'm like, man, I am really struggling here with self-control in this area. I'm not going to go into details what that is, But it has been a couple things, my wife, and I have talked to people that have covered me and I have like, hey, I do not feel comfortable because I refuse to turn into a performer on the stage. Uh, now I do, I at work and things like that, I'll call things like they are. I don't really think it's gossip. I talk to trusted sources because I'm trying to figure things out. I'm like, do you see this? Do you see this? And but out of that, I take it back and I try to do it because there is a fine line to slipping over where it just starts to be gossip and very, very toxic. But however, I— at the end of the day, um, what I, what I am saying is that I want to be accountable. I want to have boundaries in place because I care about, especially in the context of the local church, I don't want to be up there performing and just saying one thing and demonstrating something else. Everybody I talk to, like, I'm like, man, if I don't agree or whatever, I'm like, okay, let me have enough self-control because I don't want to get up there and do something that's in consistent opposition. And what I'm trying to say, there's a difference from a mistake or uh-oh versus falling into the practice of habitual sin. And a lot of people are in the practice of habitual sin. Like, what possesses you to get up there and preach the gospel but you know you a serial cheater, you know you're a serial adulterer, Like, what, what possesses you to get up there and do that? No, it's because you really have not took this to heart. Like, let's just be truthful. It's not like, oh man, I, I did some things, man. Should just, just grow up. And it takes self-discipline. It like, I, I, okay, and I'm not trying to compare scenes or anything, but I like, okay, the person is like, oh, I lie, I use profanity. But bro, consistently cheating on your wife, consistently cheating on your husband, bro, and you want to preach the gospel with conviction and get into all of this, just these antics and things like that, and you won't take the time to really have self-control? Like, that's crazy to me, man. I might, I might need to just spend some time right there because the Lord has been really leading me in this area. And I don't want to be judgmental, but this is the thing, like, if I was— if I fell into that, man, I'm sitting down. I'm sitting down, I'm talking to the body, I'm talking to the elders, and I'm like, hey, listen, this is what this— I gotta sit down, I gotta get some help, I gotta get some boundaries, I gotta be cultivated in this area, man. Grow up, grow up. But this is the thing, like, moving along, uh, boundaries and self-control protects us from external influences. Some things we just don't have to struggle with if we don't put ourselves in that situation and have the necessary boundaries. Another one, blaming others for our actions give the other person more control. Can't nobody really make you do anything. When people say stuff, they get hostile, whatever, technically they can't make me do anything. They can only provide the context, and what's going to happen is either I'm going to respond, I'm going to react. And sometimes I do react, it's— sometimes I do, and I have to repent, I have to apologize and come back and make it right. Another thing is the enemy distracts you with what you can't control to keep you from mastering what you can control. That's something we need to understand, man. We focus so much on trying to control things we have absolutely no control over, but won't even control ourselves, is what I'm trying to say. Like, self-control, man. And discipline requires doing the hard things, not just what feels easy. Like, this is discipline. I'm— man, I'm going to do this. It's— Jim Rohn said it best: what's easy to do is also easy not to do. Discipline helps me do it anyway. And then integrity. Integrity. This self-discipline helps, uh, it helps give us integrity. It helps us walk out that integrity life. In other words, man, if you make a commitment to somebody, follow through, or give— let them know why. Hey, I said I was going to be there at 8. I'm seeing that I'm about to be 10 minutes late. Call them and pick up the phone. Respect their time. They might say, hey, well, don't worry about it. Like, typically, most of the time, people don't beat me when I'm meeting somebody. And, and I'm— I even strive to be like that at work. I'm even like, one of the things I'm striving to do, hey, start the meeting without me if I'm not on time. Uh, if I'm not on time and you give me a whatever, 3, 4 minutes, I try to like— I strive to be— and sometimes I forget and I'd be like, hey, I'm running late, another meeting. But one thing that I want to get a lot better in, I don't want to just wait for 2025, and I'm already doing it is that, hey, start the meeting on time, even if it's without me. And if that meeting is running over, hey, and I have another meeting back to back, I try not to do this with my calendar, but if I have to go, no matter how intense that meeting is or whatever, it may be important, I like, I have to go, or if this person is not okay or they don't have the time. Now typically, like I said, I'll try to say, hey, I'm on a meeting. I'm about 5 minutes— I'm probably gonna be running about 5 minutes late, but I have to respect that other person's time as well. So I have to have enough self-discipline, self-control to be like, hey, I'm done with this one, I gotta move to the next one. Like, because my commitment— I want my name to be great. I don't want people, man, oh, Tim always late. I want them like, man, Tim is always on time, Tim is prompt, Tim beats me there. Yesterday I met a friend at the coffee shop. I was like, he will not beat me there. He would not have to wait on me. Like, that's just— that's one thing, because your name carries weight. And for my believers, well, I come in the name of Jesus, I come in the name of the Lord. God name is great. And like I said Sunday, Jesus would have been on time if he was still walking here. If he was— if Jesus— I just believe Jesus was telling us stuff, he would have been on time. The Holy Spirit would have been on time. So yeah, his name is great, but is your name great? Does your name carry weight? Because a good reputation honors God more than just all of this empty spiritual talk. I can't stand people that talk a good game but don't back it up with nothing when it comes to commitment. Oh Jesus, I can preach that right now, but I'm gonna move on. Proverbs 24— 26:4-5. Proverbs 26:4-5. Flexible wisdom. Flexible wisdom. Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest you be like him yourself. Answer a fool according to his folly, lest you be wise in his own eyes. Now I wrote about this, I put up— I think I put this on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. But this sound like a contradiction. Okay, Lord, you told me answer not a fool because I'll be like him, then you say answer a fool, he'll be wise in his own eyes. Wisdom is flexible. How are some people postured, man? When I'm working with people, this is an area I strive to— I'm always looking at posture. Can they stand correction? Can— are they accountable? Can we really be truthful and honest with each other? Can they correct me? Can I correct them? Because if the disposition of their heart is not right, I'm not wasting my time with it. Because some people just want to be stupid. Some people gonna just talk a good game and don't back it up with nothing. Some people just don't want to be great. They want to be on the team, but they don't want to be great. This is where discernment— wisdom requires discernment. This is why some situations I engage, some I use restraint. There's been times and when people be like, well man, you should have did this this time. That wasn't the time. I talked to them in private, they're not going to receive it publicly. There's been times I've had to give it to them publicly because I'm like, I've already talked to them privately and they still acting a fool. Discernment. I've done this with people, uh, man, especially like one, and I had to really grow in this area about 4 years ago with someone. Not gonna name their name, of course. Look, I'm always But anywho, like right off the fly, like, hey, talk with him in private multiple times, multiple times. And like, I was like, man, I, I— and I didn't have enough self-control because I'm like, man, like straight up, I'll cuss you smooth out probably and say some things where I'll be fired. Especially like early, I remember somebody is— this past day, man, had to grab me by the lapel. No, they had to come get with me and take me on a walk. Like early in my career, I believe I would just have finished like somewhat of an intern contracting guy, and then somebody had said something to me the wrong way, a senior person. They just didn't know how to talk to people. And man, when I tell you, I unloaded like right there in the cube. I was like, man, who the— like, you know. And, and this person just grabbed me. Of course, you know, now it's like it's better or whatever, and I end up apologizing. But I was young, I still had that, you know, I ain't trying to be no big bad wolf, but I'm like, bro, you're not gonna talk to me crazy. You might get me, but, but you're gonna have to lay me down. And I wasn't— I wasn't big as nothing. I'm just like, I just— but at the same time, like, you're just not gonna talk to me crazy. And so that's how I would respond. But it's like, okay, they're a fool now that I didn't tip them because I didn't have enough self-control. It wasn't the thing of correction, they were just nasty. And so as I've grown and matured, you know, I'm like, okay, you know, context matters, all this type of stuff. I need to have an arsenal of tools and I have to be okay with just walking away. Some people just want to bring you down and you have to be okay with that. And this is why it's important in leadership. It's not a one-size-fits-all. We can't hide behind this, just how I'm wired. Are some people hypersensitive? Yes, very. That's why we live in cancel culture now. That's why I like watching comedy and a lot of TV shows. I even like reading older books because they wasn't so— they're not so politically correct and worried about how this man just deliver it. Like, I love that raw, uncut truth. And I think it— I think it's needed. Yes, I think we should be diplomatic. I strive to be very diplomatic, but sometimes, man, like, let's just like gloves off, say what it say, man, mean what it mean. Like, I don't— I'm not even— anywho, but that, like, that's the thing. Context matters, and we have to understand that what works in one scenario might not work in the other. Like, I, I literally work in an agile environment. This is why context is everything to me. I believe principles matter. Best practices matter, but best practices are just a collection of other past practices. I have to really understand so I could be present. It's okay, I know this is a best practice. I don't want to create an anti-pattern, but I want to break this and tweak it a little bit based on the context. This is the thing that we have to be aware of. We have to be aware of this. Again, a lot of times, We just don't have the tool set. And some of us as leaders are trying to build houses and buildings and skyscrapers, man, when we really need to be building like a little playhouse and a deck because we don't have the tools. We need to grow in our capacity. We need to grow in our range of tools and how to use them. Context matters. And this is the thing, yes, truth is absolute. I believe that the Bible, there is absolute truth, but its application requires a nuance. It requires context. Every— the application of it requires context. How does I apply it? One of the things I said is like, if I go to the doctor and, uh, that doctor, it— he, he or she needs to tailor the treatment based on my needs, not what they gave the other patient. And that's how wisdom— wisdom discerns when to confront and when to stay silent. Like, one of the things, hey, do I need a rake or do I need a shovel? I'ma tell you I mean, I need context to that. Is it snowing outside? Are leaves falling? Because I wouldn't want to tell you to get a shovel to be out there picking up leaves, but I also want to tell you to get a rake to be trying to get snow out your driveway. Context matters. I need some context. And you know, I got a whole podcast on contextual leadership, but context matters. It does. Uh, and then the last one, Proverbs 27:6. Honest friendship. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, profuse are the kisses of an enemy. A true friend is going to offer you honest feedback about the ungodly areas in your life, even when it's hard to hear. For my non-faith-based people, affirmation apart from evaluation is the beginning of deception and the end of development. Affirmation apart from evaluation is the beginning of deception and the end of development. I believe somewhere— now, I do believe this one, I was reading a book by Clay Scroggins, and that is so true. Why? Is because you cannot take honest feedback. You cannot take correction. And so if you want to be affirmed without being evaluated, you are going to walk into deception, self-deception, because you can't see yourself. And how can you develop in areas that you won't even confront? How can you develop in areas that people can't even speak into that you know need to be corrected? Like, so, faithful are the wounds of a friend. Like, I want to create a space where people can be honest with me, especially my friends. Like, people that are really, really close to me, I want them to be able to give me feedback. Hey man, that might be a blind spot. Like, we have to create that space. We do. And this is the thing, man, we have to grow up out of avoiding like all this excessive praise and superficial affirmation. It doesn't matter because it doesn't help you grow if it's not true. Like, so many people, I want to be praised, I want to be praised, I want to be on this pedestal, I want to— I'm doing this, I'm doing this. And it's just all these things build up on what we talked about earlier, and it's like, bro, sis, that's excessive, that's superficial, that's not even who you really are. No, you want to grow. And I'm not saying like we should just walk around being the correction police and critical police. Yes, people need encouragement, but I don't want to be encouraged in the area that you know I need help in. One of my first messages that I ever preached, man, it was 7 minutes. I thank God that my cousin Vince was there. I was horrible when I go back and look at that message. Horrible. I sweating, speeding, wasn't no conclusions. And yes, I mean, I believe that I tried it, you know, my cousin, like I said, my cousin was there. Hey, so yes, it was my first time. I had a lot of grace. But looking back, I appreciate the people that were willing to give me a little tips. Baby, you know, you might want to make sure you finish your thought, this and that. Just don't— it was literally about 7 to 10 minutes, no lie. But really, in— based on how I preach and teach the gospel now versus then, horrible, horrible. Oh my God. But, but that's the thing, I didn't need excessive praise. I guess I got up there, I had, you know, confidence, I did it. So yes, I get all that celebrate, it was, it was sincere, but I needed to be developed, and that should have came, you know, quickly after. And I'm thankful for the people that did. Um, reflect on who your real friends are. You've always heard it say we're a combination of the 5 people that we hang around the most, but that's— just don't hold it to the people. Who's shaping your mind? What are the top things that is influencing your mind? The books you're reading, what you consistently watch on TV, who you're consistently around. Like, do they challenge you to be better? Do they encourage you and speak life into you, but do they challenge you to be better? When it's like, I just— it's people. I'm like, man, I want to be a great husband. I want to be a great father. Most of all, I just want to be a great man of God. I want to be a great leader. I want to be a great servant. Like, so I'm around people that, that really, really like bring the heat, if I may say. Like, they really about their life in this context. I want to look better. I want to get, um, take my health more serious. So I'm just— I'm— life is multifaceted. So you want to be around people that challenge us to be better, because it's just like a gardener that prunes, uh, prunes a tree. To promote growth. That's how true friends are. They cut away what hinders us. Yes, again, they encourage us, but they cut away what hinders us because they're not in it to say, okay, I'm gonna just let that stay, and it ends up killing them. To end on a funnier note, you know, I remember one of my professors, uh, he had a booger in his nose. He was like, hey, if I have a booger in my nose and no one says anything You don't care about me because you just let me walk out and this long big booger is in my nose. You should have said something. Hey, Mr. Such-and-such, got something in your nose, take that out. He's like, now they went on a date and the woman like, oh, like, of course, might not be fun to you, but, but that's essentially what's saying. If you see something that looks off and nasty, have the courage to say something. But also too, if you're that person, make sure you're creating that space. Make sure you're creating that space with not being highly sensitive were very toxic. And so this is the thing, like, understanding— we're done. Solomon, like, all this wisdom, but this is the thing, he departed from it. So this is why it's very important not to just know something but consistently apply and ask God, say, Lord, please don't let me fall into that. I don't want to depart from the things that you taught me. And this shows us, this shows us that it's more important than just to know, but we should do, we should obey. So I hope this episode blessed you. Again, I know I was probably talking a little faster, I was trying to get through this, run through this or whatever, but, uh, like I said, just slow it down. If you found that this was impactful, I know this was a longer one, but I'm, I'm asking you, I'm literally begging you to share this with people, man, because I believe that in the times that we are living in, we need to strive to be a bit more wise in how we go about themes. And again, this could have been 5 hours like I told the church, and it's so much more. I'm probably going to do a little bit more content out of Proverbs, prayerfully through the power of God. But if this blessed you, I'm just asking you to send it to one or two people, send it in a group text message and say, hey man, take some time to listen to this. Break it up, listen to it one day or two days, listen to it on your car ride, whatever, uh, just passively listen to it. And I just pray to God that something jumps out. So man, y'all be blessed, man. Love you, always praying for you all. I'm about to switch gears. It's early in the morning. I'm about to get ready for this work day. Again, I'm just doing this live, raw, like, no, really no edits. So be blessed. Again, love you all, man, and consistently praying for y'all. And again, seek wisdom.

Hey, what's up? I want to thank you for taking the time to listen to the Student of Light podcast today. If this content has impacted you in any kind of way, please take some time to share it on your social media feeds. And also, if you If you want to connect with me or just learn more about me, go over to www.timothypratt.org. Once again, thanks.