Crazy Faith & Trusting When It Doesn't Make Sense *unedited*

Welcome to the Makeshift Happen podcast. I'm your host, Samantha Daly, entrepreneur, life coach, and your no BS bestie, here to bring you all things mindset, manifestation, and personal development. This podcast is designed to help you expand your mind and uplevel your life. So turn the volume up and roll the windows down if you're coming along for the ride. Let's go make shit happen. Hello, my gorgeous friend. Welcome back to the podcast. Thank you so much for being here. I am— this week I'm going to give you guys a little honest life update of just like where I'm at with a lot of things right now. It's Saturday morning, and I just like really felt called to like pull out my mic and sit down and just talk. I was walking home from the little grocery market on my street, and I just was— you know, when you go for a walk, all your thoughts kind of drop in and come through. I'm sure you've experienced that. So a lot of these thoughts and conversations in my mind were just coming up, and so when I got home, I was like I should just, I should just share this with my community. And I've thought a lot about whether I really want to share an episode like this, just because I think, you know, nowadays anything that you share gets filtered through the person who's listening to it, their own lens of the world and their own experiences and their own anecdotes and traumas and perceptions and understandings of things. And so, you know, I can share something and if it doesn't match with the lens of the person who's listening to it or consuming it, they can take it in a totally different way than how it is meant to be taken. And I think that's just the risk that we take when we start to share our lives and our world and our thoughts and our perceptions. Online, you know. And even just the other day, I had the first training for my business coaching program, Aligned and Ambitious, and a lot of the women were sharing and asking questions about like, how do you share online? Like, I want to share, but I'm also fearful of sharing. And you know, what if I look stupid? And what if people think that I'm embarrassing? Or you know, what if they take what I'm saying the wrong way? Or Basically, you know, we try to plan for all scenarios and make sure that we can control the perception of ourselves that everybody else has when we show up in authenticity. And the fact of the matter is, is that you can't— you can't control how other people see you or perceive of you or what they may think or not think of you, right? And so trying to plan for that or control or make sure that everybody takes everything that you're saying the way that you hope that it's taken is, uh, I mean, it's setting yourself up for failure. You know, that's part of— that is the formula for showing up authentically in life is understanding that it's not going to be well received or loved or enjoyed by everybody. And that that is actually the whole point. Because the more, the more polarizing that we become, the more that we show up in our true authenticity. Of course there's going to be people that don't like it. But what that also means is that there's going to people— there's going to be people that feel even stronger of a connection to you because they do resonate because they do see you, because they do think you're funny, because they do agree with your perceptions, or they appreciate your advice, or they want to be in your circle, or they love your energy, you know. And so the more— that is actually how we magnetize anything. I talk a lot on the podcast about this idea of magnetism, and like any magnet we know has a north and south pole, right? It has to be polar to be magnetic. And so you have to be willing to repel the people that don't match or don't fit so that you can attract the ones that do, the ones that really, really love you and see you for who you are in all of your honesty, in all of your in all of your parts, right? All of the facets of who you are. And so this is just like an opportunity for me to practice that, um, and practice, you know, what I preach, like even when it's not as easy as other things, you know? Like I think talking about how Maybe I like declined my corporate job offers and took a non-traditional path and moved to Europe. And yeah, I came here after only having dated my boyfriend in person for like 4 months. And then, you know, obviously we long distance dated before I moved here, but like that seems kind of wild and crazy to some people and people won't get that. But it's also, it's also not nearly as taboo as like some other real raw things that are going on in the world right now. And so today I just, I woke up and I stepped out on my little balcony patio thing that we have, and I was drinking my coffee and just like looking at the bright blue sky. The sky is always so electric bright blue in Madrid. It's so beautiful. But breathing in like this crisp, fresh fall air, and this time of year is just always gives me this energy of like fresh start of renewal, right? Like, the leaves on the trees are changing colors, and then they die, and then they fall off, and that means that something new gets to be rebirthed. And I think this is like so symbolic of just how I'm feeling in life right now. I feel like there needs to be a kind of a kind of death.

And I'm actually, um, I'm actually getting emotional right now, which, hey, I'm not sure where that's coming from. So that's interesting. Um, yeah, I think like we have to be willing to let certain things go. So that we can experience the renewal, the rebirth, the freshness, the newness of something maybe even more special, you know? And I'm sorry if this is like feels really weird and cryptic. I promise it's not. You guys are probably thinking like, what the fuck is happening? Like Really nothing, honestly nothing. Um, yeah, so I'm not trying to be cryptic at all, and I will get more specific, I promise.

But yeah, this morning I just had this like weird realization of like how symbolic the change of seasons is and how it's like really bringing up more of these questions for me about like, who do I want to be and how do I want to show up in my life and in my relationships and even in the way that I communicate and I am like being challenged on that on a regular basis. Um, like even just like a stupid example, like the other day someone commented something just really fucking rude on my Instagram story, um, or on one of my reels. And they said, you know, I was talking about like, it was meant to be humorous and funny and most people got it, but again, we can't control the way that other people will perceive us. And so there's always gonna be that one person that doesn't get it and doesn't think it's funny because it triggers them. And so basically he like commented on the reel and he was like, don't let this dumb bitch fool you. And obviously like, yeah, it doesn't matter. It's just like some stranger on the internet like projecting their own pain and perceptions of life onto me. And I get that. And I maybe would have not like even responded, but I decided to go to his profile and just like be curious about like, who is this person that would literally just say this to someone that they don't know for absolutely no reason? Um, and then, you know, I realized that he was like posting some similar things that align with where I'm at right now with what's happening in the world. And so I just, I sent him, I decided to send him a private DM and I said, you know, I just watched your stories and it looks like we maybe have more in common than you would think. Um, you know, I, I noticed that you called me a dumb bitch on my most recent reel and I wanted to send you some love because I know it's a tough time in the world right now and stress is high, and I hope that you're doing okay. And I was like, he could lash out even further, not respond. I don't really know what to expect, but I really truly believe like these types of people are the people that need to be met with love. The only reason that they're doing things like that is because they have trauma that's unhealed. They have wounds that are gaping wide open. They don't have a deep understanding of self. They're unhappy in their life for some reason. They're in victim mode. They're blaming everybody else for where they are or what's happening to them. And what they need is actually to be met with love. And so I wanted to try and practice that and just see what would happen kind of out of even just maybe out of my own curiosity of like an experiment of like, You know, does this really work? You know, even when you don't want to meet people with love. Okay.

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Does it work? And it did. Because he responded and he said, 'Oh, thank you. I'm sure we have a lot of similarities and would be great friends.' Don't know about that, buddy. But he goes, 'But I'm an asshole who doesn't take the internet seriously, so in the moment I don't always realize what I'm commenting because I'm just making a quick reaction. I'm improving on this. Don't take my comments harshly or seriously. I'm not saying it about you as a person.' with a heart emoji. So yeah, I guess like the point of bringing this up is just because I'm in this space of questioning, you know, like, who do I want to be and how do I want to show up and where do I still have yet to grow? Because I think we can get stuck in this idea that like we've done the work, we are really self-aware, we know what's going on, we know what our problems and patterns are and where they come from, and we're fixing them or we've solved them, and so that's just it. And like, it's never— that's never just it, you know. There's still so many places for— in my own life and existence where I can grow and, and deepen and soften further. And like, I, I noticed this a lot, like, with my partner. If we ever get into like an argument like even just like a small stupid argument, you know, like every partnership has sort of like maybe recurring themes of things that you argue about. And one of the ones that comes up in our relationship a lot is like, if I'm taking forever to get ready, like, I feel like this is a story for so many. If you are in a heterosexual relationship, like I feel like it is just generally frustrating to males if you are taking a long time to get ready and they feel like they're just sitting around and waiting. And so this is just a random example. Of like a tiny little argument that popped up for us while we were on vacation, of like him wanting to be out and enjoying and doing things and feeling like he was wasting time waiting for me to get ready, even though he knows how long it takes for me to get ready. So I don't know why, you know, he could go out and do something if he wanted to. I didn't say like, you need to stay in the room and wait for me. So anyway, it was just this like stupid little petty thing, but it's even in those moments noticing what is the reaction in my body, like what is happening to my emotions, how am I feeling right now. And I challenged. It's challenging for me to set aside how I feel and drop into how the other person may feel. Like, obviously I am an empath and I have so much empathy, but when you feel like you are in a place where you— maybe your actions or your words or your behavior is being attacked or it's being criticized— when you're in that place it's definitely a lot harder to set down like the armor of like, wait, but let me defend myself, and really just drop into like how the other person is feeling. And so just an example of like how I'm exploring more of like, who do I want to be and how can I challenge myself to swallow my ego even more? And maybe that's part of like this death and rebirth that I was talking about earlier, is like an ego death, you know, of like really letting that shit go, or at least practicing learning how to do that. And it is hard. Like with the guy who commented on my reel, like I had, you know, some people message me and be like, wow, like I could have never done that. Like, and it's like You could have though, but it just takes practice. It takes deep breaths, space between the initial moment and your response time, right? So rather than being reactive like he was, you have to allow space so that there can actually be a response rather than a reactivity of some sort, and a humble humble swallowing of your ego. And so, you know, I, I say all of this because I think it feeds into the main thing that I want to share with you and talk about, which is this, this thing that I'm moving through right now, which is feeling really kind of like misunderstood by— it's weird because, you know, with some people I feel so seen and so understood, and then with some other people right now at the moment, I do feel really misunderstood. Understood. So a lot of us can probably relate to that, right? It's never like totally black and white. But like with my family in particular, I do feel— I do feel misunderstood. And I think that brings up a lot of stuff because family are the people that it's usually like the easiest to be understood by. But depends on your family dynamic, obviously, so not making sweeping generalizations. But in my case, for sure, my whole life, like my family has always been like the most supportive of people and I always feel super safe to like share whatever with them. We've always shared like this. We're always on the same page of like the same views about the world and about politics and about everything. And it's just such a safe place to like even just laugh or joke or complain or like have those conversations of like, these people get it. And so for the first time in my life, I know that like these people don't get it. They don't get where I'm at. And so that's like really different for me, and that's really new. And, you know, we just, we just have, we have different views on what's going on in the world right now, and we've made different choices about what we feel is right for us personally. And all of that is fine and dandy, like all of that is okay, that is totally okay. But what's not okay is if we're not able to do that anymore. What's not okay is if we're not able to have differing views, if we're not able to make differing decisions or choices. And I think that's where I get stuck, because by making a certain choice right now, it could be the thing that prevents everyone else from being able to have the freedom to make their own choice. And I don't want this to be about the pandemic or about COVID or about vaccines. Like, that's not the point of this episode. I don't want this to be about that. So if you're listening and you feel triggered, um, I, I do apologize. And if you don't want to listen to the rest of this episode, that's totally okay. But I want you to know that, like, I'm committed to always having an open table for people to sit at. Like, I will not allow the media to ever convince me to judge, deny, or condemn someone for what they believe or how they feel or the choices that they want to make in their life. So whatever, wherever you are, like, that's not where I'm going with this, trust me. I just want to share with you how I'm kind of navigating this situation and what changes it is provoking in my life, because it is preventing me from being able to do things that I want to do. And I think it's important to share that because, you know, we talk a lot about intuition and honoring that and standing in the truth of what you want. And, you know, it's easy to talk about that when it comes to jobs or dating or whatever, but this particular topic is more challenging, and I feel like it's cowardly to shy away from it and to not share. And I also think that it can just be applied, like this lesson that I'm learning in real time, this difficulty, this challenge that I'm moving through can be applied to your life in whatever way it resonates for you, right? Outside of this, like, main kind of how it's showing up for me isn't necessarily how it's going to be showing up for you, but I encourage you to just hear what I'm saying and think about how the same principles apply to another area of your life in some way, right? And so, um, yeah, I'm just really navigating how do I honor my intuition and not betray myself even when it's not fun and it's certainly not convenient, um, and to most of the world it's probably nonsensical, right? It's not, not logical, perhaps, let's say. In, you know, in the last episode we talked about bravery, and in the episode about being the boss of your own life, we talked about bravery and being brave enough to make your own decisions even when it seems crazy or stupid or wild or nonsensical to other people. And that is in fact what bravery is. It's, you know, being brave to stand in the truth of what you want and making your own decisions for you. And this may relate to you in terms of career, or quitting a job, or leaving a relationship, or moving to a different part of the country or a different part of the world, right? But this idea of lonely clarity And I feel right now, I feel so identified with that idea because that is exactly where I'm sitting. I'm sitting in this lonely clarity because I can tell you that the clarity that I have right now, like, even though it's crystal clear to me, is also extremely lonely. And I have been tempted many, many, many, many, many times to just roll over and betray myself, to just say, fuck it, you know, this is where we're going, this is what we're doing, everybody else is doing it. Like, your life would just be so much easier. Just shut up, swallow your feelings, swallow your knowing, swallow your intuition. Ignore all the red flags, ignore all the signs, just shut up and just do what would be easiest. And I have really truly and deeply considered that on multiple, multiple occasions. And I just want to be honest about that also, because whatever— even if you're like, again, this could relate to a totally different area of, of your life, but Like, the example that's coming to mind is in relationships. You know, sometimes we sort of on an intuitive level know that maybe the person that we're with is not the best person for us, or it's not the ideal match, but it is so much easier to just roll over and betray yourself and stay. Because staying is more convenient, because it's more comfortable, because you don't have to change, because you don't have to have the hard conversation, because you don't have to deal with the loneliness and the sorrow and the grieving of what will happen when you break off from that person. You don't have to go out on your own and start your life over, in a sense. You don't have to experience that death. But what that means is that you also don't have— you don't get to experience the rebirth of yourself and, you know, maybe who you truly are, or the, the person that you could step into and become if you let go of this weight that was laying you down, that was holding you down. And so this is really normal. I think that we are tempted a lot to just roll over and just do the easy thing, give in, just, you know, follow the crowd, do whatever's easiest, don't rock the boat. Like, why would I want to make my life more difficult? You know, like, life is hard as it is. We can all agree there's like a lot of shit to handle. Why would I want to make my life more difficult? And so I do. I have that internal dialogue of like, why are you doing this? Like, why do you care? Why don't you just like choose to like close off that part of your brain that tells you this is not right, this is not right, this is not right, and just get it done, get it over with, and then you'll be free and you'll be fine and everything will be smooth and dandy. I just want to be really real about me having that internal dialogue because you may have that internal dialogue as well, whether it's about this or it's about something else in your life, questioning, should I really follow my intuition on this? And I just want to normalize that it is okay to be a person who is highly tapped into their intuition and their inner knowing and also have moments of really deeply questioning that and struggling to honor what it is that you know and feel on a deep level to be true. So I'm, you know, doing my best to just practice what I preach, even when it's not easy and it's actually like really fucking controversial. And I, I get that. I get that, you know. And like I said, it's, it's not making my life easier. It's, it's, um, actively making my life a lot harder. Not only just, you know, for simple things like travel and whatnot, but, um, you know, like me and my partner, we created this whole plan of how we were gonna move back home to the US, and I was so excited about this. So excited about this. Like, we found the place where we wanted to live that was going to be perfect for us as a couple and just like the fusion of, of culture that we have together. And we're gonna live like on the coast near the water.

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Am I really gonna cry twice on this episode? If you guys are still here, um, thank you for being here. And just, I feel like I said last time, this podcast does a lot of times end up being like a weird form of therapy for me. So here we are. Um, it makes me emotional because Obviously when you like create a vision for your life, you get so excited about it, and I think it's easy to get attached. And again, this is— I feel like it's just a cosmic fucking invitation for me to practice what I preach, of like, I need to detach myself from that vision. I need to be less attached to the idea of what I think is right, or what I think I need, or where I think that I'm meant to go. So long story short, um, we're not doing that anymore. At least for now, just because it's, it's not available. We can't, um, you know, we don't, um, we don't meet the requirements to be able to go and move back to the US and create this vision and this dream and live where we want to live and make the investments we want to make and do the kind of things that we want to do. And so Obviously there's a part of me that's like so annoyed by this, and I think that's the main reason why I've questioned so many times, like, what the fuck, Sam? Like, you are holding yourself back. Why are you doing this to yourself? Like, this is so silly.

Why don't you just do the thing that you know that you need to do in order to make it happen, and then you can just make your plan happen? But because of like where I am and what I've learned and what I know, I know that it's just not that simple, and that there's a reason that the universe is holding me back from that plan, right? There's a reason that there is a part of me screaming like, don't do this, don't betray yourself. It's not worth it. Like, this is my lesson of how do you sit in the trust that what you want is on its way to you, and what you're desiring is also desiring you, and that the best is yet to come, and that life is happening for you even when it feels like it's against you. And so that's the main reason why I wanted to share this with you guys, like, not to talk about like the controversy that is in the world. Like, I don't, I don't fucking care about that for this conversation. It's— that's not what we're talking about. I'm talking about how can I be an example of doing this, of showing up in this way, of practicing this even when it's not easy, right? Because I think a lot of the, the lessons or things that we share with people is like when it's over, right? Like, I could share with you this journey of like getting to the US and living in the place where I want to live once I've already done it a few years down the road and be like, you know, we really wanted to go during the pandemic, but X, Y, and Z happened, and I felt like it was all falling apart, and then I trusted in the vision, and what do you know, something else better fell into place and now we're here and you just have to believe and trust and yay. And there is a part of me that, that knows that like I will be able to share that version of the story someday. But I think it's more valuable to be able to share in the present moment when I actually have no fucking idea if it's going to work out or if it will happen or if it will come to fruition. Right. I don't know that to be true, but I have to choose to trust that it is true and that there is a reason that I'm being intuitively guided in the way that I am. Right. Trusting that I am exactly where I need to be right now and that I don't actually always know what's best for me. And believing that God's plan for me and my life is bigger than what I can perceive of in this moment. Just like every other challenging hard time in my life, I know that I'll eventually be able to look back and connect the dots and be like, yep, that happened because it needed to, and thank God that it did because now I'm here. Right? But I wanted to share it with you from a place of I'm not there yet, and I actually have no idea what's going to happen, and I can't guarantee that I'm going to get where I want to go, but maybe it will be better. Because that's the trust that I always come back to, is like, this or something better. And so I'm choosing to trust that I am being guided, even though being guided in this moment feels like being blocked. And, you know, recently I think just through the past, like, whole 2 years or whatever, I have been leaning a lot more into my understanding of God and the word God. Because, you know, I think a lot of times in the spiritual community we use the word universe, and, you know, because it's just all-encompassing, right? What does that actually mean? It's just— it's more inclusive, I guess you could say. Because if I say universe, for you that may mean God, and for somebody else that may mean the cosmos or their higher self or their guides or their angels or, you know, source or whatever, right? And so we just use this word, the universe, because it's more inclusive. And I think it's easier for people to swallow that word, to hear that word, and to integrate it as meaning whatever it means to them, rather than receiving the word God, which is because of our societal conditioning, has certain connotations to it, and it means certain things to certain people and other things to others. Um, and so yeah, I've just been like leaning into my understanding of God a lot more recently. And I was listening to a pastor recently and he basically— I wish I could remember his name. He's like super famous. He has a massive YouTube channel and he has this book that's coming out, or maybe it's already out, that's called Crazy Faith. And so I was listening to an interview with him, and he was talking about the book Crazy Faith, and he was basically talking about everything that he has manifested in his life through crazy faith. He doesn't use the word manifestation because he's a pastor and, you know, he's speaking to church people, and maybe that is not the word they want to use or that they resonate with. But it's super interesting. Maybe I will link the interview in the show notes to this episode, because if you listen or watch the interview on YouTube, the whole time he's talking about manifestation, the whole time. And he's saying every single principle that we know to be true about manifestation, about writing it down, about trusting even when it seems unlikely or crazy. And so the tagline of his book and his life and his, his sermon is It's only crazy until it happens. And so he tells all these different anecdotes from his life about, you know, this drum set that he wanted when he was a kid, and it was, you know, thousands and thousands of dollars, and there was, you know, his parents didn't have any money for it, and, you know, he grew up in like a rough neighborhood, and it was just like so crazy that he would want this drum set, and he was feverishly like drawing the drum set and writing down this vision and growing it into fruition and then also taking action on it and getting out in the world and raising money for his passion for music. And eventually, you know, he did get the drum set. And he tells another story about this. They wanted to buy this arena for the church that they have and a huge, massive arena and how it literally was at the point of almost falling through because they had other investors at the table ready to sign to buy this arena. And for some reason, the funding went— fell through. And the real estate person, like, called him on a last-minute thing and was like, hey, the funding just fell through for these people. Like, if you could get us the deposit tomorrow, we can secure the stadium for you or whatever. And so this is kind of just um, his life examples of how God and his faith and his crazy level of trust and belief has led him to achieve things that from the outside, from a logical perspective, were just unachievable. They were just unrealistic, right? And he said something interesting that I wanted to share, which was is, faith begins where certainty ends. And I think that's so true because when I talk about faith, I always say like, faith is trusting even when you have no reason to. Like, faith is truly believing when you are in pitch black darkness and there are no clues, there are no hints, there is no— there is no certainty. You don't know, right? That's the only reason that we need faith. If we're certain, we don't need faith, we don't need to trust, we don't need to believe in anything. We don't need to believe in ourselves, we don't need to believe in a higher power, we don't need to believe in the universe, we don't need to believe that things are happening for us and not to us. We don't need faith and trust when we know what's going to happen and when we can predict and we can be certain of the outcomes. And so faith begins where certainty ends. And I think so much of our lives right now and for some time have been hanging in the balance of like, what will, what will happen to us as a society? You know, like, where are we going? Will the world ever be anything similar to what it was before? Will we get over this? Will we get through this? What will happen to my job? What will happen to my ability to travel? What will travel look like? You know, will I ever be able to move to the place that I want to move to? What will my relationship look like after all of this turmoil and anxiety and fear, we have been hanging in the balance. And if we know one thing, it's that we don't know anything, right? The only thing that we can be certain of is uncertainty. And so I think it's just such a testament about how more than ever we need faith. Whatever that means to you. Faith in yourself, faith that no matter what happens you'll be able to figure it out, faith in the universe, faith in God, whatever that means to you. But I think more than ever we really need— we really need to believe in something bigger than ourselves, because if we don't I think we'll, we'll just get swept up in what everybody else believes and what everybody else is projecting and saying, and right. And so that's just what I wanted to share with you today. That's where I'm at, that's how I'm feeling, and I think there is beauty and power in sharing the messy middle of this and really showing you how these things that I talk about and that I believe, how I actually apply them to my life when shit hits the fan, when it's not easy, when I'm faced with a hard circumstance or decision or whatever, you know, and letting you know that it's not just I'm like, oh, this is what my intuition told me, so this is what I'm gonna do. Like, no, there is a lot of back and forth, and there is a lot of struggle, and there does need to be an ego death of like needing to be right or needing to be certain or needing to know what's going to happen. And so that is just the journey that I am on, and I wanted to invite you in and let you know where I'm at, and hopefully it resonates on some level for you. Again, like, you may feel totally different about the current circumstances in the world, and I think that's beautiful, and I think that's needed, and I love that because that means that there is still polarity in the world. There is still freedom of thought. There is still freedom of speech. There is still freedom to choose what you believe is right for you. So I honor you. I love you. I see you. And if you've made it this far, I hope that we can continue to grow and learn together and not isolate or shut out one another, because that's really where we go wrong. So anyway, thank you guys so much for tuning in to this week's episode. I know it was a little emoish. Maybe it was a little much, um, but if you did enjoy this episode, I'd love for you to send me a DM if you're in a similar place of feeling alone or feeling misunderstood. Um, yeah, I'd love for you to send me a DM because you are not alone in any of it, ever. There are so many people who are moving through the same experience as you, whether it's anxiety, it's mental health, it's a heartbreak, it's a hard decision, it's leaving your job or being forced to leave your job, or, you know, I just want— I think it's really important for all of us to know that we're not alone in the way that we feel and what's happening inside of our minds right now and our thought processes and the really challenging decisions that we're being forced to make in the world right now. Anyway, I love you and thanks for tuning in. I will see you guys next week with a more upbeat episode. Um, so yeah, thanks for tuning in. I'll talk to you guys soon.

Bye!

Woo!