Wedding Spoilers! Inside My Bridal Boss Era: Arguments, Beauty Pressure & More

What's up, you guys? Welcome back to the podcast. Okay, today we are going to do something a little different. We are talking all things wedding, bridal era, and what it's really like planning an international destination wedding while running a full-time business. I've seen your DMs asking me how it's going, what I'm doing and not doing for the wedding, how I'm staying sane while juggling launches, new programs, and also, you know, florals and the cake drama that I talked about briefly on Instagram. We're going to cover it all. So consider this episode your behind-the-scenes kind of catch-up with some wedding spoilers for sure. Her, and also maybe just like a few lessons for anyone who's balancing a big season of life alongside their business or their career. Let's dive in. Okay, so I'm gonna try and answer all of your questions in this episode. We are definitely going to spoil some things that we will be doing and not doing at the wedding, and also kind of tell you the behind-the-scenes stuff, the things that we have argued about when it comes to planning the wedding, our intentions, non-traditional things that we're doing, and yeah, so much more. So let's dive in. Firstly, how did you and Jaime decide on a destination wedding in Spain? This one, I mean, to get married in Spain for is a little bit self-explanatory if you know our story. Obviously Jaime and I met in Spain when I was studying abroad there. Spain was a huge part of our life and our relationship and falling in love with each other and just our story in general. I met him when I was 21 years old studying abroad in Spain. And then after those couple of months of my semester abroad, I had to leave and go back to the US to finish my last year of college. We stayed long distance for that year while he was starting law school and I was finishing my undergraduate degree at Ohio State. And then after that, when I officially graduated, I decided that I was going to decline my corporate job offers and move back to Spain to see where the relationship would go, teach English in the schools, and just, yeah, like go back to Europe on a whim, get fluent in Spanish, travel a little bit more, live my life as a young 22-year-old that had really nothing to lose and nothing tying me down. And what I thought would be maybe one year in Spain just to see what it was like living in Madrid again, dating this person from the same city, I thought it would there for maybe a year, and I ended up staying for 6 and a half. So we lived in Madrid for a while, we had an apartment there together. That's where we got our dog Storm. And yeah, that was a big— like, the whole early stages of our relationship, the first 6+ years of us being together, 7 years I guess, was us living in Spain together. So it's a huge part of our life and our story. Jaime is obviously Spanish, he's from Spain, born and raised in Madrid. So we just kind of— now having moved back to the US a couple of years ago, living in Florida for the past over 3 years at this point. I think it was even more clear to me after living in the US for a couple of years of, of the just the level of like nostalgia for Spain and really just the beauty of that place. It made a lot of sense to be like, no, we definitely, we need to get married there. Cuz I remember when we were living there, we always knew that we would get married eventually. It was just kind of like a timing thing for us of when it was going to make the most sense in our lives, and obviously with my business and everything. So I remember when we were living there, I was like, I don't know if I want to get married in Spain because I think when you're in something, you appreciate it a little bit less, and then when you're removed from it, you're like, wait, I actually love that place. Like, that place is so cool. So now, having lived in the US for 3 years, we're like, no, Spain is the place. It's where our love story started. It's the most beautiful place. And yeah, it'll be super romantic, and I just— I love the vibe and the aesthetic of a European wedding anyways. I think of all the people, if, you know, random American girls are going to get married in Italy just because, and their, their life and their love story has nothing to do with Italy, then me, I definitely get to get married in Spain. Okay. So that's kind of how I felt about it. And yeah, we ended up picking like to actually get married in, in one of the islands was sort of random, I guess. I think because we both love the ocean and the beach and just kind of like the coastal vibe. Obviously we live on the beach here in Florida. I just kind of felt like I always wanted my wedding to be sort of like coastal and, and near the ocean more so than like a city wedding. I guess that's just kind of like more my speed, my vibe. And so yeah, we were kind of thinking about what are the best places in Spain that are really beautiful, classic, coastal ocean, but with, you know, really beautiful views. And, and so we landed on Mallorca because it's just a beautiful island and the scenery of it is just like unmatched. We thought about— or I, I should say I thought about Ibiza because Jaime and I love Ibiza. We used to go there every summer while we were living in Spain pretty much. And so all of the Balearic Islands like Ibiza, Mallorca, Menorca, all the ones over there and off in the Mediterranean, they're quite similar in terms of like, you know, they're pretty like mountainous and they have these beautiful cliffs that drop off into the ocean and, you know, those really romantic, beautiful like coves. And, but it's still the Mediterranean, so like the water is really beautiful, the weather is really amazing, but Ibiza is just kind of like a little bit too chaotic, hectic, party, extra expensive vibe for us personally for a wedding. And then Menorca, the other island over there, is just— it's a little bit more complicated. They're, they're less prepared in terms of like the options that they have for weddings there. There's less of a big like wedding industry on that small tiny island cuz it's like one of the really small ones. And it's a little bit more complex to get to as well in terms of like the options and the number of flights they have every day and how to arrive. So it's already gonna be a pain in the ass for a lot of my guests to get all the way to Mallorca. Definitely will have to take at least 2 flights depending on where you're coming from, cuz you got to go to mainland Spain first, and then you have to take a little, you know, island hopper type flight to get over to the islands there. So just trying to make it like as easy as possible. That's how we landed on Mallorca. The scenery, the how prepared they are there for weddings, because it's a huge destination for weddings. The wedding industry is just massive there on that island. So we knew we would have a lot of really good options, really high quality things when it comes to decoration companies, caterers, like all of that. And also we just fell in love with the venue that we chose. And so that's the next question, like, how did you find the venue? I literally found this on Pinterest. So because we knew we wanted to get married Spain, coastal, I was kind of searching some of those terms into Pinterest and just seeing what would come up. And I saw this like beautiful, like gazebo-looking structure, but with these very old classic, like Spanish columns. And it was right on like a cliffside with huge, like panoramic Mediterranean views. But then these beautiful, you know, cliffs. And I was like, where is this? Oh my gosh, I have to— you know, figure out where this is. And so I did a little bit of research and it was like, this is in Mallorca. And I was like, you're joking. Like, I have to figure out like if this is, if this is a real like venue and how feasible this is. So yeah, we looked it up, we found it. There was one other venue that I found from Pinterest in Mallorca that is absolutely stunning as well. And when we looked that one up, Jaime was like, Sam, I'm going to need you to tone it down just a little bit. He's like, this is literally the venue where Rafael Nadal got married, who's like the most famous tennis player, like huge worldwide famous, but he's from Spain and he's like the biggest tennis star. And they're like, this is where he got married. And I'm like, oh, so it's probably kind of expensive, right? He's like, uh, kind of, uh, yeah. So I loved that venue, but like it was just way out of our, way out of our range and was a little bit dramatic. And so this other one, I just was like, okay, well I wanna really look into this one and consider it. It's also like a really exclusive, you know, beautiful luxury venue in Mallorca, but it was much more doable for us. And so that's kind of how we landed on it, just because of the location and the views. I mean, the setting of the ceremony, it's like you walk down the aisle and it's almost like you're walking down this like part of the cliffside that just like juts out over the ocean. And then at the very end of that, there's the old like gazebo-looking structure, and it's— I think it's from like the 16th century. Like it's actually like history. And technically the venue is a historical museum because it's the home of this old Spanish archduke. Yeah, so it's really beautiful, and it's actually truly old architecture. It's not like something that was just like built to look beautiful. It's like true— there's true history in it, which I also loved. And then just like the cliffsides and like the views of the Mediterranean. So once I saw that, I was just kind of like, I have to have it, do you know what I mean? It's almost like when you go and you're like, there's a puppy that you're thinking about getting, and you're like, well, let's just go visit and let's meet the dog and we'll see. It's like once you meet the puppy, you know you're bringing it home. So it was kind of like once I saw that venue, I was like, I just know that I have to have it. And so I'm really excited about that. Okay, what has surprised you most about being a bride so far? The thing that has surprised me the most is like the intense beauty pressure and like the obsession with looking and feeling perfect that suddenly comes over you. Even if you are a person who's quite confident, loves yourself, thinks you look good, like whatever, it's like you think about your wedding day and it's almost like every single little tiny thing you feel like needs to be perfect, which is not true at all. Like, if I— someone was like, you have to get married tomorrow, I could put my dress on and I probably would feel beautiful. The photos would probably be amazing and it would be fine. But it's just interesting to notice how when you know that your wedding is coming up, you feel like everything has to be perfect for this one day. It's really weird. But at the same time, you could be like self-aware of it and noticing that you're wanting to like look and feel perfect and be a little bit too nitpicky with yourself about everything. And also you're like, I don't care, it's my wedding. Like, I want to look and feel perfect. So you just kind of like lean into it. So anyway, that has been, cuz I've been much more aware of like my physical body, my physique, my face, my skin, my hair, so many things where I'm like, okay, I need to like get this in tip-top optimal shape. And it's like, is anyone really, is it gonna make that much of a difference where anyone's really gonna notice? No. But it's like, you want to feel on that day like you are, you know, your best self, I guess. So that's an interesting thing that I've noticed that has Probably the thing that surprised me the most because the pressure and like the obsession with like looking and feeling perfect actually is it, it comes on quickly and it's like quite intense. Even if you are a confident person, you're suddenly like, oh my God, like I have to be perfect. So it's really, yeah, really, really interesting and also makes you spend a lot of money on, on random shit. So maybe we'll do another episode on that. There was a question in here too about like anything that I'm doing specifically for like beauty and wellness prep, like skincare, fitness, those types of things. So I think that kind of falls in the same category. We would probably have to do a whole other episode on that stuff. So if you're interested in my like bridal prep of like what I'm doing for my health, my fitness, physique, skin, any of those things, we can do another episode on that if you guys are interested. So leave a comment down below if you want that episode. I don't know if anyone really cares, but I can definitely do that. Okay. How did you find your wedding dress? So the wedding dress thing was actually kind of funny, but it, because it came together really randomly. There's this. This one designer that I always knew, like, they make really beautiful dresses, and I knew that I wanted to look at this designer for wedding dresses. And I know that they have a store in Miami, so I always knew that I wanted to go there. But I randomly got like an ad or something on— probably I had been on their Instagram already looking at stuff, so the ad was like targeting me. But anyways, I got an ad that they were having this trunk show where they have all of their designs for like the following season that haven't come out yet because they've just been shown at one of the fashion shows in Miami. They keep all of the brand new designs for the following year's, uh, collection in Miami for a couple of days after they show them at the show on the runway. And what you can do is you can go and you can try them on and you can get, I think it's like 10% off if you buy them at the trunk show. And it's only like 3 days, so it's like over a weekend. And so I got this ad for the trunk show in Miami and it, uh, like I'm always here pretty much. I mean, I do travel, but like I'm always here. And it just so happened that the exact dates that they were having that trunk show were dates that I was supposed to be on the other side of Florida for a business conference event that I was going to with one of my friends, Sam, who you guys might know, Sam Alteri. And I'm like, goddamn it, like, I really need to go and see these dresses. One, because if I do find one that I love, I'd rather get it, you know, on a discount. Two, it's the only time that you can see the next season's designs. So based on like the timing of my wedding, I wouldn't have enough time to be able to purchase any of those newer designs. I'd just have to go with like an older collection because they don't bring out those new designs until springtime, and there just wouldn't be enough time for me to like try them on, have it made to my sizes, delivered and altered and all the things before I actually get married. So I knew that that was the only time they would actually be able to see the brand new collection, and I just wasn't— I just kind of wanted to, do you know what I mean? Like, why not? So I was like, okay, I think I'm gonna have to leave the business conference the last day. I'm gonna have to skip the last day and I'll drive back to Miami and I'll make the latest appointment that they have at like 4:30 PM and I'll just like go and see these dresses. But it happened so quickly that I didn't even have time because it was like the following weekend. I didn't even have time to like tell my mom to give her enough time to like come down to Miami and come see dresses with me, or ask my sister-in-law to come travel to come see stuff with me. So I was like, I think I'm literally gonna go to this like dress trial, like, alone. But like, I just want to see these dresses. I probably like won't even find anything. I don't know. And so thank goodness, Sam, we are at the event together and she was like, let's just ditch the last day together and I'll come with you. So she literally changed her flight instead of flying out of like Fort Myers on the other side of Florida. She was like, I'll change my flight to fly out of Miami. I'll come with you to the dress thing and then I'll just stay at your house that night and I'll fly out the next morning. So I was like, oh my God, that is I was like, so nice of you. So her and I ditched last day of this conference that we were at, drove across Florida, got to Miami right on time, went to this dress fitting. And my other friend Annelie, who's another bridesmaid of mine, she came to the fitting. So it was just us three, and we FaceTimed my mom and my sister-in-law and people, but it was just— it like happened so fast. And I, I did find my dress at that fitting, and I tried on Okay, so I have something I think you're really gonna love, and your business is gonna love it even more. Do you want to steal the strategy I've been using to seduce premium buyers and sell out my offers on Instagram Stories? Chances are you're already posting, you're already making sales, but if your Instagram Stories aren't working as hard as you are, you're leaving money on the table. Sold Out Stories is going to teach you exactly how to change that so that you can sell out any offer at any price point. 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I don't know, maybe like 8 dresses, not even that many. And it was the first place that I ever went to. There were so many beautiful dresses, like I could have honestly gotten any of the ones that I tried on. They were all gorgeous. And I ended up getting one that was— which people typically say this is what happens, like you get one that's a style that surprises you, or that is like not exactly what you would have thought, or what you came envisioning, being like, I know that I'm going to have this type type of dress. Yeah, I don't want to give too many spoilers about the dress, but I'm really excited for it. I think Jaime is going to love it. And yeah, as soon as they put— like, I loved the dress when I put it on. It felt like it fit me perfectly. And actually, you know how when you do like wedding dress fittings, they usually have to like gather all the fabric at— all the extra fabric at the back and put those like clips or clamps on the back to— for you to see how it would actually fit you when it's made in your size? It was like ironic and kismet that the one version of this dress that they had— because again, it came right from the runway, it's new design that wouldn't come out until the following season. The one that they had there, when I put it on, they were like, this is actually your exact size. Like, we would order the dress for you in this exact size. Obviously I'll have it fitted, and, and maybe there's like some little tiny tweaks or alterations that they might have to do, and especially when it comes to like length and things like that. But in general, it was my exact size, so they didn't have to put any clips or clamps on the back. So I was able to see like the whole dress, like how it would really fit me. Because it truly was my size. And so that was exciting. And she's like, yeah, you'll probably be one of the, if not like the first bride in the world to ever wear this dress because your wedding is really early in like the 2026 season. Unless people get— have got this or buy this at, at the trunk show, there's not enough time for, you know, the brides that have their weddings at the time of year that you do for them to be able to get this design. So not that it like matters, but I also just felt like it was so another thing where you're like, it was meant to be, like, this is supposed to be my dress. And then when they put the veil on me, that's when I like— I didn't think I was gonna cry because it was just fun trying on these pretty dresses, but they put the veil on me and that's when you really feel like, oh my gosh, like, I am a bride. And so then I really cried, and that's how I kind of knew that it was my dress because I just felt so— I felt so beautiful, I felt so angelic in the dress. I was jokingly being like, I look like Mother Mary, like I felt angelic in the dress, so I'm really excited about it. I think it's gorgeous. Are you going to do multiple looks? So the plan is yes, to do multiple looks. I think I'll just do two. I feel like any more than two changes for me personally is just like taking away time from me actually enjoying my wedding because you have to go back, you got to like change your outfit. If you're going to do like a hair change or a makeup touch-up, like the minimum time that you're going to spend for any look change is probably going to be 30 minutes., and some people spend more depending on how much they wanna change their hair. And so it's just missing out on really amazing time of enjoying your wedding and being present and being like at the wedding instead of back in a room, like changing your look. So I do think I wanna do a second look mostly just because I love to dance. I need to be twerking on the dance floor. I need to move my legs. Like I don't really want to be in a long gown for my after party. I think I want to be in a short dress. So I ordered a really gorgeous one. It was like covered in like crystals and gems, and it was very, very cool, but it didn't fit me right, and it was really uncomfortable and just like stiff. And I was like, this just isn't the one. Unfortunately, I had to return it, and I do not know what my second look is going to be yet, but I have some ideas, and hopefully it will, it will come together. But yes, I'm planning on doing a second look. And then for like hair, I don't know if I'm gonna change my hair because I know for the ceremony I am gonna do slick back, just because one, that's like one of my main looks. You guys know, like I always slick back my hair and, and do a slick back bun. So it feels very me. I'll feel very myself in that. I think it's like really complimentary to like my face shape and my cheekbones when I do a slick back. And then also because of the venue and where we are, we're right on the ocean, so there is going— like it's bound to be— and we're on like a cliff, like it's bound to be windy. Cuz I thought about doing like two pieces out in the front with like a, an updo, but I think they'll just be blowing and then like sticking to my mouth or something. And so I'm just gonna slick it back and then you have no issues. And also that like lasts forever, like it'll stay good. You don't have to worry about curls falling or anything, like it'll stay looking good for the entire time. So, but once you do a slick back, like you can't really do much else after that because there's a bunch of oil and like wax in your hair to slick it back. So in terms of the second look, I don't think I'll really change my hair. The most that I would do is like maybe try to pull pull two front pieces out and like brush them out and like curl them. And then maybe instead of a bun, do like a fun ponytail or something with maybe like a ponytail like extension to give me like a really thick and nice looking ponytail. I don't know yet though, it depends on also what the look is and like if that hair matches the look, but we'll see. So are there any wedding trends that you're skipping entirely? We are not going to do the garter situation. Like I might wear a garter, but we're not going to do the thing where I like sit on a chair and Jaime like takes it off of my leg with his teeth in front of the whole wedding. I don't, I don't know, that feels like a little bit too sexual for me. Even for me, like, and I'm, I'm definitely not like a traditional, traditional bride, but like, I don't know, I don't really like that. Especially in Spain, I think they're much more conservative. Like, when most brides get married in Spain, they have to have their shoulders completely covered. So even if they're wearing a dress that's like a tank spaghetti strap, like, for their ceremony, they will have like a a full shawl or something like covering their shoulders and their chest, and it's very like modest, which is not my style at all. Like, no offense, but like all of the wedding dresses that I've seen for weddings in Spain, like, I hate them all. Like, I think they're— I think they're so bad. So I— it's not like I want to adopt that style or be like that at all. I just think the garter thing is just— it's a little too far for me. I don't really like it. The other thing that I guess we're not doing is Jaime and his mom won't be doing like a mother-son dance for the groom. I know a lot of people do that, nothing against it, they just— not their style. They just don't want to do it, so we won't be doing that. Are you doing anything non-traditional? I guess the better question would be, are we doing anything traditional? But some of the, some of the non-traditional things— obviously it's not in a church. I think that's the most traditional way to get married, and there are so many beautiful churches and cathedrals in Spain. Like, I would have loved to get married in the church. So it's not that I don't feel comfortable there or like I wouldn't want to do that. Definitely as a Christian, I think it is so beautiful to get married in a church, and I would have loved that. It was more so just the fact that we were really committed to the vision of having this like coastal wedding. And if you wanted to do like a church or cathedral, everything would just be really spread out then because there's not a lot of those that are like gonna be on the coast or where you're gonna have this, this beautiful sprawling view of the Mediterranean Sea with like a church right next door. So you'd basically have to get married in one place and then do like an hour, 2-hour drive to wherever you're gonna have your reception and dinner and afterparty and all the things. And we just wanted to limit the amount of like moving about that our guests have to do because they already have to travel to get there. And so we really just wanted the ceremony and the reception and the party and everything to be in like one central place. And we obviously fell in love that venue. And so that's, that's the venue. So we're not getting married in a church. Jaime's best friend is gonna be the celebrant. So he's gonna be the one who marries us and kind of leads the ceremony. Another non-traditional thing is that we are planning to sleep together the night before the wedding. I love the idea of like being separate and having that time away because anytime that him and I have apart, we definitely like long for each other and miss each other a lot more. And I think that would be really, really special. Like, I love the concept of it. My problem with it is that maybe I'm slightly codependent, but like, I, I think I'm gonna be way too nervous the night before. And I sleep so much better when I'm with him. Like, I really don't sleep well when I'm alone and we have to be apart. Yeah, I think I'm gonna be like too nervous, anxious, excited the night before, and I don't want to not sleep well. And sometimes, like, if I'm really nervous or something, I can even work myself up to the point of like being physically sick and like vomiting and things. So I'm like, that would be the worst case scenario possible for the night before my wedding is to like get no sleep, look super tired, have just been like throwing up all night or something because I'm anxious and I'm alone and I'm in a weird bed and I'm in a country that's not mine. And like I have this big day tomorrow that I can't stop thinking about. So I just think it'll be better for me and my anxious girly personality to be with my fiancé the night before. So he would love to do the sleep separate thing just for the tradition of it, but I'm like, I need you. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I need you. I need you. Something else is that we are going to see each other before the ceremony. So again, like, I love the idea of like having that time apart and like having the first time that you see each other in like 24 hours be like the moment that you walk down the aisle. Like, oh, I wish I could do that. It, it's like in my head I'm like, that is so beautiful, it's like such an amazing thing to do. But the reason that we're going to do a first look and we're going to see each other before the ceremony is mostly because we want to be able to capitalize on that time before the ceremony to get get some of our own photos done and just do some of that stuff because we want to enjoy our wedding with our guests. We don't want to be taken away during the whole cocktail hour and all that time to be doing photos. Obviously we're gonna have to do some more photos during that time because we're gonna be getting closer to like golden hour. The sun is going to be setting right over the ocean there, so there's going to be insane lighting and photo opportunities that we will have to capitalize on. But we do want to be able to get some photos beforehand just to not have to spend as much time not at our wedding to get photos. So that's the main and only reason we are doing a first look. Another non-traditional thing, I guess, is like I'm not wearing my veil over my face. I was trying to decide this when I was trying on my dress because I do love the look of the veil over the face. Oh my God, it's like iconic. Again, like, I wish I could do it, but I think for the glam and for the wind and just like the situation, I think it will be better if I don't do that. Other non-traditional things like our seating, I think, is going to be mixed. So I don't think we're necessarily gonna do like bride's side versus groom's side. One of my friends is gonna be hosting a bridal blessing for me the day before the wedding. So a bunch of the women, my bridesmaids, like the people that are important to me in my life, there'll be just like a women's only kind of circle to do like a bridal blessing, which I'm really excited for. We are not going to have any formal rehearsal dinner. This is not a tradition in Spanish weddings. They don't do rehearsal dinners, although I think that they should because no one knows what the fuck is happening at their weddings. Because no one's ever practiced and it's very obvious that no one knows like where to stand or what to do or whatever. So there's no formal like rehearsal dinner. However, I do think we're going to try to gather just our like wedding parties and go to the venue before and do a little like walkthrough ourselves, like super casually. And then the night before the wedding, we have like— in Spain they call it like the preboda, which is like the pre-wedding celebration. So it's usually like dinner, drinks, and like a little bit of like a celebration the night before. So kind of like what you would do with a rehearsal dinner, but the two things are just like kind of separated. Hopefully we will get to do a little informal rehearsal cuz I do think it would make everyone feel more comfortable and calm. Just like knowing like, oh, this is where we walk, this is where I'm gonna stand. Uh, this is, you know, the order of things, whatever. The other thing is because of the way that the one, like the venue is set up, there's not a lot of like space at the front where Jaime and I will be standing with our celebrant. So we're not going to be having our wedding party stand with us at the front. They'll be seated like in the front row, but they won't be up there with us because of the limitations of space. But also I just think with the— if you see the photos of it, like with the gazebo type structure, I think the photos just kind of look better with just like bride and groom instead of like all these people like crammed in there. Then with this like big structure as well, having all those people up there just kind of like distracts from like the simplistic beauty of like the architecture and the ocean views. So it's just gonna be us up there. And then we are also not having a ring bearer or any flower girls. And that's not because we don't want to, it's because none of our family members are bringing their kids because they're like, listen, we're going to Mallorca. We wanna have fun. We wanna have a good time. Like we are not bringing our babies. So it would've been my niece and my nephew. Also Jaime has some young nephews that could've been part of it in some way. But none of them are coming. So because their parents are like, listen, we're leaving the babies at home, we want to have a fun time, parents only. Will you and Jaime be doing bachelor, bachelorette parties? Yes, we will. Jaime actually already had his bachelor parties when we were in Spain a couple of weeks ago. So what they do in Spanish tradition is your friends secretly plan your bachelor party for you. You have nothing to do with it, you have no idea where you're going, and then they kind of come and they surprise you and they capture you, and then they take you away and they take you on a trip, they take you to another city, and they also make you wear really embarrassing costumes the entire time. And yeah, so his friends came and took him from Madrid when we were there, and they put him on a plane and they took him to Lisbon in Portugal, and they dressed him up in a bunch of things. He was like— had to dress up as like a priest and then some other like random— I don't know, like a rapper or something, some random costumes. And they went to like a music festival and they did karaoke, and they were just like— they were just going out and like having fun in, in husband. So that was cute. And, uh, for my bachelorette party, we haven't planned it yet, but I think I'll just— I actually wasn't going to do one because I was kind of felt bad of like, it's already a destination wedding, it's a lot of money to like ask people to come all that way to celebrate you. And I still think like that's the most important thing. If you have to decide between like coming to the bachelor party— the bachelorette party, sorry— or coming to the wedding, like come to the wedding. Like who cares about the bachelorette party? So I wasn't even gonna have one, but then my friends were like, well, we should at least do like something, like even if it's just like a small group of us here in Miami. So I was like, okay, like I'll invite my friends and like if people want to come they can, but it's like no obligation at all. And we'll probably just do something fun here in Miami, maybe like take a boat out, maybe do like a, like a beach club day or something. Hey, don't forget that every month we are picking a Listener of the Month to win $50 in cash just for showing love to the show. All you have to do is leave an epic review of the podcast on Apple Podcasts podcast, screenshot the review before you hit submit, and DM that screenshot to us on Instagram @makeshifthappenpodcast. And that's it. I want to thank you for being such a loyal listener and show my appreciation by putting a little extra cash in your pocket. I know it's super easy not to do it, but every single rating and review seriously helps the show rank higher and reach new people, so we appreciate them more than you know. We'll announce the next winner at the end of the month and slide into your DMs if it's you So keep an eye out and good luck. Love you guys and thanks for supporting Makeshift Happen. But I think I definitely want to have one just to like, even if it's just like a small group of us, but just to like, yeah, have that moment. I think they're fun, fun memories and cute pictures, and you only get to do it once, right? Hopefully. Like, hopefully we're not getting married again. So yeah, I kind of want to be in my bridal era and do all the things that the bridal era has to offer if can. Are you going to do vows? Yes, we are going to do vows. I mean, like, I'm assuming this question means like our own written vows, like personal vows. We are going to do our own personal vows and we are going to do them at the ceremony. Cuz I think like, let's be honest, wedding ceremonies, a lot of times people are like, they just can't wait for it to be over, unfortunately. But that's like the reality of it. And I'm not going to try to pretend that it's going to be different for me and everyone's suddenly just going to like care about my ceremony. Like a lot of people, especially when it's in a church, like let's be real, everyone's like standing like, okay, when is this gonna be over? Like if the ceremony's too long, like people really, they're like, okay, this is dragging. They're not enjoying it. They don't like that. And the wedding is for us. It's not for the guests, of course. But like, I don't know. I think if you are going to sit through a ceremony, the most interesting part is listening to them do their personal vows to each other. Right? Am I right? Like we're all nosy. We wanna know what they're gonna say about each other. That's the only part that makes a ceremony like fun and interesting. Interesting. So we are going to do our vows. Jaime is a little bit reluctant because he's nervous. He does not like to be— he's very extroverted, but he does not like to be the center of attention. So like in conversations and, and in groups, like he is super social, but in terms of like standing up, public speaking, like being in front of a lot of people, ever all eyes on him, like that's probably his biggest worry for the wedding day is like he's gonna be very nervous. He does not like to be the center of attention. So even just like standing there at the, you know, front of the ceremony waiting for me to walk down, He's like, oh my God, what am I gonna do? Like, I'm gonna be so nervous. And then there's all this pressure that people put on the grooms to like cry and have a certain reaction. And I think it's a little bit unfair. Like, I've heard people saying to their fiancées, like, if you don't cry when you see me, I'm gonna turn around and I'm gonna, I'm gonna start over. Like, okay, well, if you say it like that, then how is he possibly gonna allow himself to even get to the point of crying? He's gonna be so freaking nervous that he has to have the right reaction for you. So of course, is it beautiful when they get a little teary and there's that special moment? Yes. But I think you can't put too much pressure on it or else you're almost like making it harder for that to even happen. So I was like, don't stress about your reaction, like it'll be fine, just be natural. I'm like, if anything else, just remember to smile, do you know what I mean? Because like his face, he definitely has resting bitch face, his face can be really serious. So I'm like, if you don't cry, it's fine, just remember to smile, that's all you have to do, just, just look happy, you know what I'm saying? And then we'll be good, like we'll be good Because you love to dance, will there be any choreographed routines? Oh my gosh. In terms of like flash mobs or like long, like elaborate choreographed routines with like other people, no, there will not be. But Jaime and I are going to learn a first dance. I don't know how complex it's going to be, but we definitely wanna learn like a couple of moves. 'Cause I feel like if you just stand there and do the like homecoming dance, like it's like we're 15 years old in the high school gym and we're just like, just holding each other, swaying back and forth. I mean, like, who wants to watch that? And people feel like they do have to watch. It's rude if you're just like eating your steak while they're doing their first dance. So you have to turn and you have to watch, and you're sitting there but there's nothing to watch because they're not fucking doing anything. They're just holding each other like zombies, swaying back and forth. So I do think we need to learn some moves because we need to provide the entertainment, and that's what the people want. Same thing with the vows. Like, I know, I know what the people want, okay? They want to hear us get emotional. They want our inside secrets about our relationships with each other and how much we love each other learn how we express that and the things that you don't see publicly. And they want to see some fucking dance moves, you know what I'm saying? So we definitely will put in— even if it's not like the whole dance is choreographed, like, we need, we need to have a couple of moves, you know? So TBD on that. We have not started practicing yet, but we've been looking on YouTube. I was like, I found a studio, a teacher. I'm like, I want them to choreograph a routine for us, like a light, light choreo, like not anything crazy. We're not going to be doing like get lifts or like any, anything crazy. But like, I just thought it would be easier for a teacher to choreograph it for us and to like teach us. I'm like, we just have to go a couple times, a few classes, and then once we know the routine, we can just keep practicing it on our own. Chaim is like, Sam, I'm really nervous. I'm so embarrassed. Don't make me do it, please. Just let's just do YouTube and you teach me. I'm like, fine. Okay. He's already doing a lot of things that are outside of his comfort zone. So I'm gonna try to learn something from YouTube and see what, see what we can do. But I'm like, this is more work for me No, because I have to like find a routine. I have to learn it, I have to study it, then I have to try to teach you. So I don't know, let me know what you guys did for your first dance. Maybe give me some inspiration. If you, if you also learned on YouTube and you have any hacks for like how you practiced or like what made that good for you, please comment down below, let me know. Okay, so when it comes to the planning process, someone was asking like what the planning process has been like with Jaime and like if he's been involved, etc. He actually has been very involved. He at the start was very involved in interviewing and securing the venue and finding out all the information about that and, and getting that locked in. He also interviewed multiple wedding planners and he took those meetings. Like I was busy like with work and clients and stuff. And so he took those meetings, he met with the planners, he evaluated, then he brought the information to me and he was like, this is who I think we should go with. So he basically did all the stuff to get our planner. And yeah, he's always communicating with her. Like we're, we're in a group chat with the planner and me and Jaime. And then also I found out that he regularly messages her on the side, extra things and stuff that he's concerned about and voice notes. And he calls her a lot. So he's, he's very involved. He knows everything that's going on. He's well aware of it. He knows the budgets for things. He knows. Yeah. He's, and he has preferences and he has opinions. So he is definitely letting me take the lead and letting me create the wedding that is, you know, in my vision. But him and I have really similar tastes, so it's, it's really rare that I would want something and he would be like, ew, like, I don't like that, or not my aesthetic or whatever. So the only things that we kind of push back with each other on is like, obviously I'm willing to spend a little bit more on it because I'm the bride and I'm like, but these chairs are so much better than the other chairs, honey. And he's like, yeah, but the other chairs are included at no extra cost, and these ones are an extra, you know, €14 per chair. He's like, and we need 100 of them. And I'm like, I know, but they're so much better. And so it's things like that where he's being— wanting to be a lot more practical with prices of things and stuff, and I'm wanting to be a lot more in my like dreamland of curating the perfect day, which I think is a very regular experience between like bride and groom. But in terms of like aesthetics or things that I've wanted to choose, or even like the timing and what we want to have at the wedding, like we've been very aligned, so we haven't had any issues there. At the start, we each decided what our like worth the splurge items would be. We also did that when we bought our house. We're like, okay, what are your things where you're like, because we're not gonna, you know, have the best of the best or like splurge on every single thing, but like you get to select what are the things that are the most important for you that you deem like worth the splurge. And so he picked his and I picked mine. He said music and food, and I agreed and I was like, perfect, love that. So then that left for me the ability to go, okay, well mine is photo and video. So those are our worth the splurge items that we tried to like do really good quality for. So fingers crossed, but I have a good feeling about it. I think it's gonna be good. Are your parents helping to plan it? So no, my parents and Jaime's parents are not at all helping to plan the wedding. They are like, both sets of parents are super chill. They are not planning it. They are not paying for it. It. They haven't asked for like their friends to be invited, or they have not tried to control literally any part of it whatsoever. Like, obviously we tell them stuff, but like, I think that they are going to be equally or almost as surprised as our guests when they arrive, because it's basically just been me and Jaime planning this. So they have not really been a part of that. I think it's nice to have— it's a different story when your parents are paying for your wedding, and so then obviously, you know, I think it's normal for them to want to be more involved and have more of a say. But I think it's nice when your parents like really just let you have your day and like let you make it what you want it to be, and you don't feel any pressure that you have to please them in any way or like do what they would want. And it really is just, you know, the bride and the groom making the day what they want it to be without any of those like outside influences or pressures. What has been the most stressful or challenging part so far? Okay, so a couple of things. The invitations is the only thing that Jaime and I had a disagreement on that we went back and forth with quite a little bit. Like, we actually had like an argument over it. That was because, again, I felt strongly about the idea of wanting to do these really beautiful custom artwork invitations that 100% is like over the top, extra. Like, you do not need to go that hard on the invitations. And I knew that. And his perspective, as a lot of men's perspective is, is like, literally no one cares about the invitation. Like, they receive it in the mail and they throw it out. Like, you could even do like a digital invite. Like, no one cares. And while I understand that perspective, and it's true that a lot of people are just gonna throw the invitation out, for me, because we're having this wedding in Spain, it's so much easier for Jaime's family and friends to get there. And it's gonna be much more of a sacrifice for anyone on my side, my friends, my family, to be able to come to this wedding. They are going to have to spend probably easily at least $1,000, if not a couple grand, to come to this wedding just because of of flights, obviously, if they're, you know, coming with their spouse or a plus-one or kids or anything like— it's multiple flights, it's international, and then, you know, hotel stay. Maybe they're gonna make a trip out of it, which I highly recommend, and I think it's a beautiful excuse for a lot of people to come to Spain at one of the most beautiful times of the year and like really enjoy. So yes, that's a lovely opportunity for them, but at the end of the day, like, if you're gonna come to this wedding, like, I know that it's going to be a significant sacrifice for you, for the people from my side. So I was like, the invitation is really the first impression of the wedding. And if you send them a really beautiful invitation that you can tell was like custom, and you put time into it, and it has the artwork of the venue, and there's watercolors and the wax seal, and it just looks beautiful, and it's like this cotton handmade paper, and it has our own like crest on it with our initials, like all these things. I really wanted the invitation to be like beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. And Jaime was like, can we please— like, this is way too expensive for an invitation that people are going to throw out. He just like we did not see eye to eye on that. But I'm like, it's the first impression. When you get that invitation, you're like, oh, this is, this is kind of informing me a little bit of like what the wedding is going to be like. And maybe it makes people more excited to come. It makes them a little bit more excited about the idea of going to Spain, about spending money, about making the sacrifice, about doing the trip. So I felt like it was really important. And we went back and forth for a bit. He was like, if I can find someone else who can do something similar for cheaper, like, will you let me? And I was like, I I should submit to my fiancé and I should let him lead and I should respect him and I don't want to trample over his opinions. I literally called my friend Sam. I was like, I want to respect my future husband and I want to allow him to lead, but I also must get what I want. How do I do these two things? Like, how do I be the feminine future wife that I want to be and also be like, but I wanna get my way? So I did. I was like, okay, I'm gonna let you look and you can bring solutions to me and we'll see. And so he brought me an option and I fully like went into it and was like available for it. And I was like, okay, let's try it. Let's get— let's ask her what she can do. Let's do some mockups, let's do whatever. And it just— it was one of those things where I felt like I was gonna have to really micromanage that project to be able to help the artist understand my vision and get what I wanted. Whereas the other person that I'd wanted to hire, like, this is what she does full-time, and I had seen her work and was like, I want that. And so I knew that I would be able to fully delegate, and she got it because it was her artwork, it was her style, it was her vision. I was like, it is worth it to me to spend a little bit more for someone who I'm not gonna have to be on top of this project, I'm not gonna have to micromanage, I'm not gonna have to come back with a bunch of edits, I'm not gonna say, oh, but can you do this, can you do that, can we make it kind of like this? And so we ended up going with the person that I initially wanted to hire for the invitations, and I'm so happy with them. I know it's like a silly thing, but actually so many people have messaged us and been like, this invitation was so beautiful. Like, I've never seen an invitation like this before. And so I was like— and a lot of Jaime's friends finally got their invitations in the mail and they've been messaging him like, oh my gosh, this invitation was so nice, blah, blah, blah. And so he's getting those messages now and I'm like, see, it feels good, doesn't it? So anyway, the invitations was the thing that was kind of like a challenge for us. The other big challenge that I ran into was literally the The day that I was leaving for my trip to Spain, which a couple weeks ago we traveled to Mallorca because we had to do the venue tour, tastings, cake, uh, meet our planner, like all— we were basically going there to do all the like trials and stuff. The day that I was leaving, I get a message from my makeup and hair artist that I already put down a deposit for like 6 months prior, letting me know that she was not going to be in Mallorca anymore during that week when we had scheduled our trial. And it was for something so legitimate. She— her father passed away. So unfortunate. And so So I tried to work with her to find another time, but I was only— I only had 4 days in Mallorca. And so she was like, the— I, I get back on Thursday night. And I was like, well, Thursday is my last day in Mallorca. Let me see if I can change my flights. I'll stay an extra day in Mallorca. I think I can stay there on Friday by myself. Jaime would have to leave because he was going for his bachelor party. But I was like, I'll just stay an extra day in Mallorca by myself. We can do it Thursday night or we can do it on Friday. And then she was like just suddenly was like, well, I don't think this is going to work out because I can't guarantee if, like, if I don't have any delays with my flights that I'll be there on Thursday. And on Friday I have a wedding, so let's just cancel it and here's your deposit. And she just like super quickly was like, we're done, and like sent me my deposit back and everything. So I was like, like, literally I have no one to do my makeup and hair for my wedding now. And like, those people book up so fast because when I tell you This whole island like runs on the wedding industry, especially in those months. So I frantically, I'm like, in a few days I'm gonna be in Mallorca and that's my only time to do a trial for my hair and makeup before the wedding. I have to find somebody. And also it's challenging because I don't know if they're gonna be available for my wedding date, let alone if I'm like, hey, can you meet me tomorrow to do a trial? Like it just seemed so farfetched. And so I was frantically like reaching out to people trying to find new artists. To look at on Instagram and get people from my planner. And it was a weekend also, so like no one was answering emails or like whatever. And so it was crazy. That was, that was definitely very stressful. But I did end up finding a girl, and she was coincidentally had a cancellation where someone had moved their event from the day of our wedding to another date. So she had an open availability for the wedding date, and then she was like, and yeah, I can do a trial for you tomorrow morning. So I was like, oh my God, thank God. So I was able to do a trial and find someone, but that was like very, very stressful for a hot second. Okay, favorite parts of planning. Definitely picking the music because I just love sitting in my car and crying to myself when picking all the songs. The fact that Jaime agreed to learn a first dance with me and like we get to practice that together and basically make fun little like date nights out of us practicing our dance. Like I think that's a really fun memory and a really cute way to even just like bond and like be closer together, like the process of like preparing the dance and practicing it. Okay. In terms of balancing like all the bridal stuff with business, you know, doing all the wedding planning and running a 7-figure business. And also this year I've been launching and creating and building multiple new programs and offers and all the things. I think the biggest thing I learned in this is that when something is important to you, you literally find the time. Like it's funny because if you would've asked me at the start of the year, I'd have been like, this year is jam-packed. We have so many projects. Projects, so many launches, so many things on the calendar. I've essentially been non-stop launching something. I was just talking about this with my assistant the other day in our meeting. She's like, dude, we've been non-stop launching stuff since literally June. And I'm like, yeah, it's been months and months and months of just back to back to back to back to back projects and programs and new things. And yeah, it's been a lot of work. And so if you would have asked me at the beginning of the year, like, do you have some extra time to take on this whole— I would have been like, literally no. Like, I don't have any time. But it's funny, like, when you care about something and it's really important to you, and also when it's fun and exciting and there's dopamine in it, of course, then you find the time, you make the time. But it's just another one of those lessons of like where you really find out your capacity, cuz you think that you're at max, you think that you can't do more until something really important enters your life, and then you realize like, oh, I actually can do more. I felt the same way when buying my house because the whole home buying process was so intense and time-consuming, and I, I was in another full-on season of my work, building, creating new programs, doing all the things, and everything was really up to me at that time because because Jaime didn't have his green card yet. And so everything had to be in my name, approved by me, done by me. Like, it was crazy the amount of work that that was. But I was like, wow, I actually have more capacity than I thought. And I think this happens to a lot of business owners and even just like career women when they have kids, is like, you think you're maxed and then something really fucking important happens in your life and you're like, oh, I actually can do more. And so it is this kind of interesting experience of, of realizing your capacity and how much you actually are able able to hold? What have you learned about delegation or decision fatigue through this process? I learned a lot of things about this. What I learned is that I hate when people say, what time can you meet? I think this is good advice for anyone. Like, if you ask me, like, oh yeah, let's do something like next week, or let's set up a meeting, what time works for you, or what dates work for you? Ah, okay, that gives me instant IDF, instant decision fatigue. Fatigue. Can't do it. Like, give me 2 to 3 options max. Be like, Wednesday at this time, Tuesday at this time, whatever. And then I just pick one. I think this is such a good tip. I tell my clients all the time to do this with sales calls. Do not give them a giant calendar with 25 options of times and dates to pick from. It creates decision fatigue and it makes them go, ugh, I don't know what days I'm going to want to do it or when I'm going to be available or when I'm going to feel it. I'll pick it later. And then they don't do it. It. Same thing with like having your clients, even once they've enrolled, booking and scheduling their calls. I'm just so not a fan of like clients can book in their calls whenever they want to. It's like when you start a coaching package with someone, you should give them 2 to 3 options max of when their calls are going to be and then lock in that day of the week and that time for the rest of the container. And then obviously if things come up or travel or whatever, you can be flexible in moving things. But like, to me, that's the worst possible thing is that all these people just have calendar links and they can just like pop up on my to-do list for that day. Like I can just get meetings popping up on my calendar whenever, like unbeknownst to me, I'm like, oh, I have to do 3 sales calls tomorrow apparently. Like, I really, really do not like that. Gives me anxiety. And it doesn't work well for other people. When you give them too many options, they oftentimes don't execute. So give people 2 options. Just be like, this or this. And if neither of those work, then present another two options. Do you know what I mean? But that's one thing for sure. I think it's a really good piece of advice. The other thing I learned is like that when people bring me problems with no creative solutions to follow it up, it really irritates me. Obviously you just heard me talk about that, but I think like if you are someone who is a service-based business owner or you have clients or you work with people or even like in corporate and stuff, it's like, be a problem solver, not a problem announcer. Answer. There's nothing worse than someone who's just like, hey, so we have this big fucking problem. And then it's like, okay, so do you have any ideas about what we should do or how we could solve this? Like, get creative, be a problem solver. The other thing is like, if you are a high-achieving entrepreneurial woman, the reality is that most people are going to be lazier and less competent than you. And that can be really frustrating when you realize that not everyone is as obsessed with their quality of work as you are, you're like, wait, people actually just like live like this? Or they do half-ass work all the time? But it's one of those things that you kind of have to understand and almost expect and be able to like roll with because other people, especially if you're running a company and you have employees or whatever, it's like that saying, like, no one's ever gonna care as much about your business as you do, obviously, as the founder and CEO. But even with working with other people, like if you're a super like high achieving entrepreneurial ambitious type woman, you can't expect that everyone you encounter and everyone you work with is gonna have that same level of competency and detail-oriented and be like obsessed with the perfection of things. And so you do just kind of have to like roll with it to some degree. So some last little tips that I would say is like things that we did that I think were good is like at the start Jaime and I decided that we would be a team in this process and we had to like really sit with each other and be like, we want this to be fun. We want this to be enjoyable. We want this to be a memorable time, not like an awful time leading up to like this one day that's supposed to be like the best day of our lives. Like, we really want to enjoy the process of building this vision together and creating it and planning it and remembering that like the wedding is only a few hours. So if you want to spread out the joy of that day, then you kind of have to decide to enjoy the process and the lead-up to it as well. And so we just made that decision with each other where we're like, we are not going to argue about things, we are not going to get in fights with each other about anything— not that we never like fight, but I'm like, if we have disagreements or differences of opinions, like we need to just remember we want this to be fun, we want this to be joyful, like this is a team project, like we want this to be a good time. And aside from the invitations, like we have not had any issues with each other in any of the wedding planning. Like I've not been annoyed at him, he's not been annoyed at me, we haven't had any stress, any problems, any disagreements, any anything. The only thing was the invitations. And we worked it out because I got what I wanted. No, I'm just kidding. Just kidding. But it is, it's like a group project and it's something that like consistently brings us together and we get to like work on this like as a team. I think it's kind of fun. And I do think it'll be a little bit sad when it's over because it's just so fun to have a common goal that you're working towards and like a vision that you're building together and something that you're both really excited about. So that's kind of been my experience with it so far. I think if I could give advice to another ambitious woman who's planning something big while also growing her business, I would say like make time in your calendar for it, especially during the high times. Like with wedding planning specifically, you know, at the very start there's a lot of work because you have to vet all the venues, you have to pick planners, you have to pick all of your vendors, like all of that stuff at the start. I did not know that there was going to be so much work like right out of the gate because it's really tedious and time-consuming going through every, you know, every makeup artist, every photographer, every videographer, every DJ, every— like having to review all of their work, look at everything, check their Instagrams, It's a lot of like research and time and whatever. So there's a lot at the start and then there's a lot like towards when you get closer to the end of like right before the wedding, it's like all those final details. So probably like blocking, planning ahead and like blocking some time in your calendar for like the high times. And then that time in the middle is like, there's, it's just little maybe communications back and forth, but not as much stuff. I think also just know that you are probably going to ditch your work tasks sometimes to do wedding planning things. Or planning whatever other big thing it is that you're planning, because it's way more of a dopamine hit and it's just like way more fun. And so you kind of just have to like expect that and like allow yourself to kind of do it. I think that you have to be really clear with your partner from the beginning, like I said, that you're both agreeing for this to be a fun and joyful process and to not create arguments over wedding things. And I think if you can, you should definitely hire help like a wedding planner or day-of coordinator. Like, you do not want to be trying to coordinate where people are standing and who's doing what when, when you are the bride. Like, that is the worst worst case scenario. So even if you don't get a planner, you definitely should get a day of coordinator. And any big project or planning thing that you're doing, if you can, like, hire help, because even if it's a stretch, it's going to be so, so worth it. And my kind of like motto, which maybe isn't always the best, but like, I just think money comes back and memories are forever. So I keep saying that to Jaime. I'm like, honey, money comes back, but memories are forever. Come on, we only get to do this once, right? Like, bring everyone that we love into run space and make it this like fucking amazing memory. Like we're gonna die and you don't get to bring all of your money with you. Like money comes back, but memories are forever. And last, I think be clear about what you want and don't want, and don't be afraid to stand up for yourself. Like if someone tries to tell you that something's not possible or you can't have this or whatever, right? It's like get creative, make a way. Don't take no for an answer if it really matters to you. You. So if you are already married or you're also in your bridal era, please comment down below your favorite things that you did at your wedding because I still have time to take your info and maybe add in some cute traditions. So please share with me some of your favorite things that you did or are planning to do at your wedding. I would love to hear them. Also, if you would want to watch a vlog of all of the behind-the-scenes footage from our trip to Mallorca when we did the venue tour, the tasting, the floral arrangements, all all of that stuff, the makeup trial, etc., comment vlog down below because I asked on Instagram if people would want to see this and the jury was like really out on it. So I haven't fully decided if it's worth it for me to have my editor take all that footage and make it into a vlog. If you would want to see the vlog of that, please comment vlog down below to let me know. Thank you guys so much for tuning in. I hope you loved this like girly catch-up kind of behind-the-scenes wedding spoiler type episode. If you did, let me know. Thank you guys so much and I'll talk to you next week. Bye!