Wes SpencerCo-Founder, Empath · Co-Founder of Empath | Recovering Cybersecurity Guy| Keynote Speaker | 2020 Cyber Educator of the Year | Building the MSP Workforce Operating System

Afraid to Negotiate? Try This One Mindset Shift

25 Jul 2025 · 1 min

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1:00

In this brief coaching segment, the speaker acknowledges that many people feel uneasy before a negotiation and introduces a mindset shift inspired by Ned Lynch’s training. The core advice is to adopt curiosity as a strategic tool: ask open‑ended, clarifying questions such as “Tell me more” or “How did you come to that conclusion?” to uncover the customer’s underlying motivations and the real business impact of the issue at hand. After gaining this insight, the speaker recommends presenting the counterpart with multiple options rather than issuing ultimatums, thereby keeping the conversation collaborative. The guidance is framed for salespeople, account managers, and virtual CIOs who want to move from fear to confidence in negotiations.

Chapters

Anybody in the room get uncomfortable when you get ready to negotiate? If it makes me uncomfortable, I can imagine I'm not the only one. So there's a few hacks that Ned Lynch teaches in this course that I want to share with you guys today. Being curious is a salesman's secret weapon. The same for account managers and VCIOs. When we're having a conversation with our customer, the most important thing we can do is just ask clarifying questions. Anything from, "Tell me more," to, "How did you come to that conclusion?" "What is it that makes you feel that way?" And let them explain it. So don't assume that we know what's going on in the person's life. Don't assume we understand how they got to where they are. Ask a clarifying question. Dive into their business and try and figure out what is it about the thing that we're negotiating about really has an impact on their business. And then finally, Give them options, not ultimatums.