Here is why you attract people who reject you!

Whoo! There we are! I'm live on all three. Well, hello, hello, hello, and welcome, welcome. This is April Mason, and this is Inspirational Tuesday. Hello YouTube, hello Facebook, and hello Instagram. I'm trying to do it all at one time here to see how we can work this out because I have my YouTube people over here that says, Miss Mason, you don't come on YouTube as much anymore, what's the problem? Then I have my Instagram people over here that, you know, we building that, and you know, they complain sometimes well too. And then we have my favorites, my loves, my hearts, my supporters, all of you here on Facebook. So my YouTubers and my Instagrammers, Facebook, just show me more love. Maybe if y'all show me a little bit more love, your girl will be over on both platforms. But I'm doing my best to give you options. So we're— it's like a simulcast, like a simulcast today, got like a simulcast. So I'm watching you. Hey over there, YouTube, I see y'all saying hey. I see y'all, I see Hey over there, Angela, over there on Instagram. And, and good morning, um, Great Britain and B and Avis. I see you. What's up, sexy? I got a love for you. You do? Boy, you better stop. Thank you so much, Castile. Hey, Chronicle DeWitt Gregory, good morning, good morning, good morning, and good morning to y'all over there on YouTube, um, as well. So I know you saw the topic for the morning. Well, uh, Instagram didn't. The topic for this morning on Instagram, for Instagram, um, is, um, I'm getting ready to explain to you why you are attracted to drama-filled people who reject you. I'm getting ready to explain, I'm getting ready to explain something, um, and I hope you get some aha moments in this because when it happened, when I figured it out, I, um, got some aha moments too. You guys are sharing already, thank you so much Facebook. See, Facebook be sharing and stuff. I'm just saying, Facebook be sharing this stuff. So thank you guys so much. I believe this is going to be a blessing to somebody this here morning. So let's see, I'm— let me see if I can— I might be able to do dual things here. Hold on, y'all, hold on. I'm getting, I'm getting better with my technical stuff. If you guys are on my mailing list, I hope that you got my email this morning. If you're not on my mailing list, you can go to teachmehowtodate.com Download your free gift that I have for you over there, and you will be put, um, in my mailing— on my mailing list. So I hope you got inspired. If you are on my mailing list, also, if you purchase any product from us and you haven't gotten it, please, please, please check your spam, because some of you have sent us emails saying, this is my third or fourth time emailing. We respond, we respond rather quickly, but if you do not check your spam, it might be sitting over there. So before you reach out to us, do your due diligence as adults and check all of your other folders, um, first. Okay, so we're talking about why you continue to attract people who will reject you, people who, um, are drama-filled, people who like you gotta prove your worth to. And you guys know I always use me as an example when I share my experiences and what I've had to go through to get to where I am now, which is in a great place. Um, I like to be very trans— as transparent as I possibly can, uh, with you. So you're tired of attracting janky people, drama-filled people? You're tired of attracting people that seem to reject you? If you're a person that seems to attract people that have rejected you Say me, me, me. Let me know, because I want to make sure that this is not just, you know, me, and I'm not just talking out the side of my neck. So say it's me. If you, if you seem to attract— if you look at the last 5 people you've dated, or the people who have come into your life over the last, uh, I would say maybe 5 years, 2 to 5 years, do you see some commonality within them? Oh, I see they saying me, me, me over there on Instagram. Let me know over here on Facebook. Is it— do you continue to see a, a a cycle, you know. It's real repetitive. It's like, why do I meet people that I like but they constantly reject me? Why do I meet people that are full of drama? And why do I feel that push-pull? It's always that tug, that push-pull, all the time. Why can't it just be easy? Why can't it just be easy? Why does it always have to be something. Why is it the people that I like don't like me back? Raise your hand. Is that you? Why is it that the people that do like me, that may not have any drama, that may not reject me, why don't I like them? Hmm. Am I talking to somebody this morning? Used to be me not Now it's what I don't want. Okay, I hear you. I'm talking to y'all over there on Instagram. Yeah, LaShawn raising her hand. Y'all, y'all got a couple of hands up. Okay, it's me for more that they're not on my level. Same thing, same thing. Well, I'm getting ready to share with you my story on my aha moment, and for some, y'all might feel a little weirded out, but I'm going to explain what I mean. Yeah, yes, uh, why don't you like them? Yes, because normally the person that does not have the drama, the person that is not rejecting you, the person that's not difficult, you put them in the friend category and you friend zone them and you find everything wrong with them. Uh-huh, you find everything wrong with them. So here's my story. During my process of After my breakup in 2014, and I said, you know what, I'm not dating nobody for real, for real until I get it right, because I don't want to keep going through the cycle. I paid attention to the cycles that I continued to go through. Well, I get great advice. I'm gifted and intuitive and, and spiritual, all that kind of stuff that, you know, God has given me. You know, I've embraced my gift, um, especially my gift of discernment and the ability to see the why behind what people do. And I can walk in a room and pretty much give you the rundown about everybody. Um, and so with that, here's, here's what I didn't do. Sometimes when you've gone through so much in your life, you don't grieve, you keep moving. Anybody just keep moving because you might have the kids, and I had a break, you know, might have a breakup. I don't have time to grieve, I don't have time to sit down, I don't have time to think about all this. I gotta keep moving. Anybody else? That was that just me? Just got to keep moving. Um, and when you keep moving, you never deal with the issues. Yes, YouTube over there. YouTube, you never deal with the issues. So when you don't deal with the issues, what happens is you continue to go through the same cycles, and you think it's something wrong with everybody else, but it's actually something wrong with you. So let me, let me, let me get down deep in my stuff. Let me get down in my deep, in my stuff. I shared with you guys that I always have attracted pretty influen— high influential, very popular, very handsome, the crème de la crème, the men that all of the women loved. I've all that from the time I can remember, right? Those were the kind of men that I, that I didn't choose. They actually liked me, you know, little April, right? And you gotta follow me with this because I want you to see how it manifested in my adult life. So I would always attract those guys. Like, um, I remember in the 8th grade when I went to a new school, uh, and now I was raggedy. I didn't have all of the nice clothes or anything like that. They called me Lil Welfare April. And then what happened was one of the most popular boys, if not the popular boy. When I came to the school, he liked me. Well, all of the girls that liked him was like, why do you like her? Look at her, you know, look at her skin. She's, she's dark-skinned. Because back then it was like, if you ain't— if you light, you right. If you chocolate, you know, that wasn't it. So he was like, I like her. And because you got— now this is middle school, let's go back. I dealt with molestation from the age of 5 to 17. So before I even met this young man, I was already broken and didn't feel like I was enough. So this started, started back then. So let's, let's make sure we got that clear. For you guys that know my story or read my book, you get it. So I dealt with that. So by the time I got into 8th grade, I had already been violated, which meant my self-esteem, which meant my confidence, which meant my value and self-worth was already out the window. So now you've got this handsome, fine, chocolate— all the girls googly-eyed over this boy. And if any of my middle schoolers that I went to school with don't know, you better not say his name. He wanted me, but I didn't see my value. That was that incident. When I met my daughter's father— no, before that, when I get to high school, the same girls that bullied me in middle school bullied me in high school. So when I got there, I'll never forget, I'm walking through the middle of the campus and one boy walks up to me and says, would you just please date my friend? And I'm like, who is your friend? He was like, he said his name, I said, the captain? I said, isn't he the captain of the basketball team? He was like, yeah. I said, but he like me? Because I didn't understand my value. And he was like, yes, he talks about you all the time. And when I tell you, he was fine. He like this one, y'all. Yeah, if I would have known better, I would have dated him. It would not have, uh, not, you know, not acted the way that I did because I didn't feel like I was good enough. Because as soon as he started liking me, one of the more popular, well-dressed, valley kind of girls— I grew up in California, so, you know, she was that, you know, long hair, you know, uh, fair skin, drove the nice car— when she found out, she did everything to discredit me and dog me out, talk about me to him and all that stuff. And I can't blame him, he was a young, young boy, you know, he might not want all that pressure. So we didn't date. That was that. When I met my daughter's father, he was— I didn't even know who he was when we moved to the neighborhood. And I'm giving you guys this background for a reason, because I want you to, I want you to understand how all of this played a part in my adult life in my 40s. I'm about to show you how I got my breakthrough. So when I met my daughter's father, we moved to the neighborhood, um, in Vallejo, California. We moved to the neighborhood And he did— he was on vacation with his grandparents at the time, so he wasn't even in the neighborhood when we met. But the girls, from what I heard, they was like, oh, you need to meet such and such. And I'm like, okay. There's like— he's like the— he's like the king in the neighborhood. Everybody loves him. And I didn't know at the time, he was 17, but he had a 25-year-old girlfriend. I was like, whatever, didn't pay him no mind until we met. I was— I was sitting in my in my garage, in our driveway, and he came to town and the boys were all playing football and he was once again the influential, the leader of the pack. So, you know, he and I started dating, hence my daughter. Now let's get to my son's father, my boy's dad. We met when he was in college. He was the star wide receiver, rock wide receiver. I didn't know what it was about me, but I still didn't have the value and the worth. But do you see the pattern here? Do you see the pattern? I've always attracted influential leader type, uh, masculine type of men, so it's nothing new to me. Now let's move past all of that. Now during that time, you got to remember, I dealt with molestation from the age of 5 to 17. So after I got out of the house and got with my kid's father, I still didn't know my value, nor did I know my worth, nor did I think I was good enough. Because my cousins was like, oh my God, you dating him? Uh, didn't you see him on ESPN? I'm like, no, you know, it wasn't a big deal. Um, and so I remember he had, um, I remember when they won the championship, they got to go see, um, President Clinton at the time. They got to go to the White House because they won the A— well, I don't know, whatever it was, they won the championship that year and got to go to the White House. So my cousins and friends were like, April, how you pull him? I'm like, what you mean? You know, not realizing I've always attracted the influential kind of guy. Now let's— let's leave that and fast forward into my adulthood, like for real, for real. I would wonder— no, take that back. My good friend Joe, we had a conversation last year, I think, and he was like, Mace, all right, something is up. And I'm like, what is— what you mean? He said, you the only woman I know that attract the crème de la crème of men that most women would be vying for. Because I always had kids, I had kids early. So my friends that didn't have kids was like, how do you meet these men that just want to take care of you and want to do this for you? And we don't have no kids, but you do. They were always from, from radio execs to politicians to sports to all anything that you can think of. I've always attracted them, but here's the key: I could never hold on to them. I hope y'all listening because I'm about to drop something on you. I was never able to keep them. So my friend Joe was like, Mase, all right, if anybody pick up your dog on phone, you got folks— most women would be like, oh my God. I'm like, yeah, but it ain't no big deal. That's because that's all I knew. Those were kind of men that I attract. I didn't do the thugs, that wasn't my thing. Um, so that was it, right? But Joe was like, Mace, why can't you lock one of these fools in? And I was like, that's a good question, Joe. And I was playing it off as they just wanted one for me, and you know, they, they had issues, right? I was playing it off as it was It was them. But here's the kicker, y'all. Y'all ready for this? Yeah, let me know if you're ready for this. Say, I'm ready, because I'm about to drop this on you and you go— somebody gonna get their breakthrough today how I had to get mine. Because this right here, when I tell you, it shook the crap out of me to where now I'm in a position where you can't tell me nothing. Put it like this, I didn't value myself enough. And I ain't got to the— I didn't drop the ball yet, uh, the bomb on you, but I'm about to. But let me give you this, I didn't believe enough in myself or value myself enough, I wouldn't even go to places where high-end men would be because I didn't think I was worth it. So it was easy for me to go to the little club with the little hole in the walls versus going to a higher-end, more upscale place, even though I would— I, I was always told, you look like you belong to a wealthy man, you look like a wealthy man's wife. I would hear this all the time, right? But in my mind, it didn't, it didn't equate in my mind that April, you can have a successful guy, like you are good enough for him. So here's the ball I'm about to drop on you right quick. The reason why as an adult, even in my 40s, I could not lock in one of those successful, very sought-after men that I always attract— the reason that I would attract them and they were— they would either be emotionally unavailable or somehow some rejection or something would come in, something like that would happen, right? This is why. My inner child needed to be healed. Oh, let me say that again. My inner child needed to be healed. Now let's go back to the story I told you, one about when I was 14, when the boy at the school liked me, right? Every man that I chose that rejected me, that was the influential, that was the guy that was, um, successful, that all of the women liked. As a 40-year-old woman, the 14-year-old girl in me was the one attracting those men that would reject me because that's what I was accustomed to. Jesse said, girl, I see you, I see it, I see you. So I had to step out of my comfort zone. So, so there's some guys that I have been seeing And I didn't realize what I was doing. They actually represented the guys that I could not lock in when I was 14. They were either the athlete, they were either the one that was most attractive, they were more successful, most popular. As a grown woman, I was attracting those guys and they liked me, but for whatever reason, I could not lock them chokers in. And I'm like, what is it? Because I like him. So I thought— I really didn't like them. The 14-year-old girl in me liked them. The 42-year-old woman did not like them. So anytime I got around them, I felt like I was turning into— I felt extremely passive, or I felt like I was turned— I'm like, what is it? You know, I'm a confident woman. Why is it when I get around these guys I, I get real tussle. What is it? That was the 14-year-old girl inside of me that was reaching, trying to be accepted, not trying to sell herself on showing you how wonderful I am. Whereas the woman doesn't have to do that. The woman just has to show up. But I couldn't show up. Hey YouTube, I couldn't show up. I couldn't show up. And the reason why I couldn't show up is because that 14-year-old girl, when those discrepancies happen, was holding on to the 40-year-old woman. So yes, I was still attracting these influential men. But I couldn't lock them in because I, I was probably repelling them with my 14-year-old girl vibe, not realizing that's what I've had going on. Yes, Nicole, it definitely was an epiphany. So I'm here to ask you today, if you continue to attract the same type of people, it's a strong possibility, baby, that it's the inner you that needs to be shield that's drawing them. And you wonder why, dang, I like— why can't I? Now let me tell you, I do like powerful, influential men. I already know the type of woman that I've identified, the type of woman that I am, and I like that kind of guy. So that part of me is correct. I, I know the type of man that I'm built for, but the problem was I didn't know how to be the 40-year-old woman for that to attract that guy. That's why I always say it's so important to thy own self be true. Fellas, if you keep attracting drama chicks, if you keep attracting women that you feel like you got to prove yourself to, or they always reject you, maybe it has something to do with that type of girl. It was the type of girl that rejected you as a child, so So now you done lost the weight. You know, you might've been a big dude, a big sexy girl growing up. So now you've lost the weight, you got your money up, but your motivation for doing that had nothing to do with you. It had everything to do with trying to attract the girl that actually rejected you. What if you attract men that are already in relationships already but want to date you? That means you're emotionally unavailable somewhere. Hey, Monica, baby. April, this is a book, girl. I'm doing— you never know what I might come out with. But, um, there was a lady that helped me in this process, um, as well. And I did something that took me out of my comfort zone that I normally wouldn't do, but it broke me. But then by the end of the week, I realized, April, you didn't even like him. He just represented the same type of guys that you didn't feel like you were good enough for back then. So, but you really don't like him like that. Mm, am I making sense? Um, can the decision-making also be equated to the fact that women and men will also ways not to see each other eye to eye. Um, I think you can't really see anybody eye to eye if you haven't gotten yourself right. So what will happen is the, the women that are attractive, drama-free, don't have all of the other foolishness going on, you'll friend zone her because you're looking for that, that somebody that I got to show you, I got to prove, I, you know, I got to prove to you, um, that I'm worthy. I, because I'm so used to being rejected, so I, I'm, I'm subconsciously allowing you to reject me. That's what I'm doing, not realizing it. And so when I, when I caught it, y'all, when I, when I, when I caught it, I don't know what happened to me in that moment, but something took over and you can't tell me nothing. Like, matter of fact, I told you guys about what happened when, um, I went to lunch— was it dinner? I wasn't going nowhere. If you read my newsletter today, Uh, you got the, you know, the full story of what happened this past Saturday. But it was— I felt something break off of me when I identified, oh, this is what the heck it is. Because I could actually feel like when I was in the presence of these men, I would just like— I would turn into like this little 14-year-old schoolgirl with a crush. And I don't act like that. The 14-year-old girl in me acted like that. Mm. You read it, it was good. Well, thank you for reading my newsletter, Living in a Healthy Body. So thank you guys so much for sharing this. Let as many people see this because I think it's gonna help some folk get loose. Why do I always attract men that seems to want me to take care of them? Maybe because you're motherly and you You subconsciously want to feel needed. That could be, that could be too. Let's see. So what does your showing up look like? Because I, I take no ish, no excuses, no second chances for the foolishness. Uh, see, and that's a problem too. That, that attitude right there is a problem. See, I don't have to say I don't take no ish. Matter of fact, I had a friend, maybe he might be watching. I have a friend that, um, we were hanging out, going out, you know, going out, hanging out, and I disappeared. And so he reached out to me yesterday on social media and he said, uh, I said text me because I don't have your number in my phone anymore. So he calls, he says, so you know how to You don't have my number in your phone no more. And I said no. And he's like, no, I— he said call me. So he texted me and I called him. He said, well, hello there, uh, uh, Love Lost, you know, how you doing? And I'm like, I'm good, darling, how are you? And he says, um, hmm, so you don't have my number in your phone no more. I was like, mm-hmm. Hold on, y'all. Is it going? Okay, there it is. I said, no, I don't. He said, what? Well, what's the problem? What happened? You know, he, he called me out because I said the same thing. I said, well, you know, we weren't looking for the same thing and you know, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right? He said, hey, but we could have had a conversation about that. He said, you and I were friends before we were anything. Before we even thought about liking each other or anything like that. We were friends. He said, so for you to cut me off— and I'm saying this for a reason, y'all, because not too many people check me on it. It's only been 2 people that take me on, and it's something that I know that I have to work on. He said, you, you cut me completely off. You didn't have no explanation or anything like that. Because normally how I function is like this: once I decide I want something real or my life I don't feel like I need to pick up the phone and call everybody that I might have been randomly, you know, casually going out to a movie or to a concert or something. I didn't feel the need. I need to say that, right? And you never know how the other person feels. So he says, uh, I don't care what you do with nobody else. With me, you don't cut me off. I was like, Oh, oh, okay. He said, no, we could have had a conversation about this. I said, well, you wasn't ready for nothing, and, and I wasn't looking for what you was looking for. He's like, no, no, no, no, no, I hear all of that, but you say something to me. He said, we could have had the same conversation, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I said, you right. I said, you, I said, you are absolutely, um, you're absolutely right. I could have done that. So I said that to say, having that, I don't take no ish, no second chances, all of that stuff. Sometimes that's on us because I'm like that. I, I, they call my friends, call me the umbilical cord cutter because I cut you off real quick. But I appreciate him for calling me out. He said, see, everybody else treats you like Miss Mason, you April around me, and I'm about to treat you like, treat you like that. He said, because don't nobody talk to you like that. But me. And I had— you right, you, you, you, you right. So I wouldn't be surprised if he watching. Um, let's see. So as a man that's not able to find a lady— wait, hold on. Um, in my life, I will have to review it as an issue from my younger point life relationship. Very interesting. Thanks for the point out. Yeah, Willie, the thing is We have to look at self. It's not always everybody else. We always want to point the finger at everyone else, and it's not everybody else's fault all the time. Ain't that right, YouTube? Now see y'all over there. It's not everybody's fault, uh, for everybody else's fault all the time. If you continue to attract the same type of women, if you continue to attract the same type of men, you are the common denominator, baby. So maybe, just maybe, taking some time to figure out who you are and what you are doing and what is going on on the inside of you that even causes you to attract that. Because, uh, I gotta say, a lot of our brothers in the Black community, y'all got a lot of psychological issues. And I'm not saying this taking shots. What I'm saying is, although many of you say you do not like women that have drama or um, going off on you in public and all that. If you look at the women that you have been choosing, they all do that. The most, the most of them. So you got to look at it as a psychological thing if, if that's what you've been getting. Because we hear men all the time say, we don't like drama, we don't want drama, we don't want a woman with drama. But if you look at their life and the women that they choose, they'll friend zone the woman that You know, she don't have that. They know. Now put it like this, they'll be— they'll sleep with the woman. They, they can sleep with a woman that might not be, um, drama-filled and all of that kind of stuff. But I'm— I am explaining to, um, Tony, I'm explaining it right now. If you can look at the women that you've been dating and they all seem to have the same tendencies, dealing with some drama, you got to save them from something, um, it's a push-pull, it's a tug and all that, that would suggest that on a subconscious level— now I'm not saying it's a conscious thing because consciously you're saying I don't want a woman full of drama, but if you look at the results of the women that you attract, they always in need, they always leaving some type of relationship, they've been abused, all that, that would suggest that you have the hero complex as well as you like feeling needed. So you have to go in and save a woman with drama. So, like, for instance, I told a friend of mine in the past, I said, see, a woman like me would bore you. He said, why do you say that? I said, because all of the women that you told me that you dated, I'm looking at your— at the trend, and a woman like me would bore you because the stuff that you're telling me that you had to do with these women, or they weren't ready for me at that— at the moment, or, you know, I— you know, they rejected me, or whatever, that, that tells me everything that I need to know because I'm not that kind of woman. So I will become boring to you. I would, I would not be exciting to you because you don't have to jump in and save me from anything. You don't have to jump in and, and deal with the— let me show, let me save her and show her that I don't, um, that I'm not gonna hurt her. Let me show her that I'm a good guy. Let me show her she ain't got to deal with abuse no more. Let me show her these things. Find you somebody that you ain't got to show all that. Or if you do have to help them a little along the way, because we all need some help, At least let them be receptive of you. Let them be receptive, um, you know, of what you bring to the table, and not just having to deal with trying to save them. You don't want that. We all need somebody, but we— the person has to be receptive of you. And if they're not, that's a doggone problem. So fellas, look at it. I, I coach too many men with this issue, so I'm not talking out of the side of my neck. I expect you— why do you speculate? Who's speculating, Jocelyn? I have way too many, um, male coaching clients that I deal with this issue with, and it's not until I'm able to show them their pattern that it's like, wow, I didn't even look at that. And then when we get back down to their mama, let me see what your— what was your mom like to you? Oh, okay, now I see. So it's either they're dealing with something from their past or how they were treated. So nobody's speculating. That's, I'm, as they say, I'm speaking facts. That's why these, why you saying, Jocelyn, why am I speculating? These men are agreeing more for the most part. So I'm listening. So the fellas can identify that I ain't nobody speculating. I'm telling, I'm telling the truth. And women do the same things. However, I just, I don't, I hear so many men that say You know, there's so many women with drama. Am I making sense, Tony? Thank you. There's so many men with drama, and but the men are saying we don't have drama. You know, we don't, we don't want no woman with no drama. She got all that baggage. She don't know a good man when a good man come into her life. Well, are you showing up as the good man, or are you showing up as Captain Sable? That was like me. Am I, was, am I showing up as the confident classy woman April Mason is, or am I showing up with the 14— as the 14-year-old girl because I'm in the company of men that represent what it was that rejected me, or I didn't feel good enough for back then, and it became a self-fulfilling prophecy? So you got to ask yourself, why you screaming, I don't like drama? Look at your, look at your, your pattern. Look at your pattern. Have you ever had a man throw you personal trauma in your face? If so, how did you handle it? Um, I have, um, and I divorced him. See, in one instance I'm good at, you know, cutting folk off when I need to. In another instance, you know, sometimes I cut people off too too quick, and I'm working on that. But, um, see, how I live my life is like this. As a single woman now, been married, been divorced, which is why I can talk on both sides. I prefer the married side, gotta say that. But I'm in an amazing position to do all of the self-work on me that I possibly can before he gets— he actually manifests. He already here, but we waiting on him to manifest in the flesh, you know. I, I I tell y'all some things I don't tell y'all. Yeah, Daddy, what's my sign? Everybody wonder my sign. I'm a Cancer sun, an Aquarius moon, and a Libra rising. I know all my stuff. I'm not into it all like that, but a lot of it makes sense about personality types and how you act the way you do. I don't believe all in depth, but when I figured that out about me, I understand why I'm not as sensitive as a total Cancer, because I got that Aquarius in me. I get I get it. So I don't, I don't, I don't act like, you know, your regular straight-up, you know, Cancer. That's why nobody, nobody can say this is exactly how a person is going to act because we got so much other stuff going on in us. So, well, that's great. How do you— yeah, a lot of— right, it is, it is, it is. Absolutely, Patricia. So you gotta— you have to look within, you guys. I didn't get my flowers today because, um, I was running late and I got to get out of here. I have a meeting. Um, but look within, look at your patterns and stop blaming everybody else. I have been single since December. I said I'm going to go— going to date myself now. I'm meeting a lot of guys in wrong to go out and on multiple dates with different guys? Is it wrong? Well, April Allen, that's what our topic will be this Relationship Thursday, darling, at 10 o'clock. Is it okay to date multiple people? So I will be discussing that because it all has everything to do with your view of what dating actually is. So I will be breaking that down this Thursday at 10 PM on Relationship Thursday because you guys staying on my inbox asking, is it okay to date multiple people? How can you— how, how can you date multiple people and give a person your time? It's like, yeah, people multitask every doggone day. And well, I'll, I'll get— I'll get to that. I'll, um, I'll get to that. Uh, Noob 7 said no, not a good idea. It depends on what your definition of dating is. Dating is nothing more than collecting data. Dating is not exclusivity. So you— I'll get into this and I'm gonna break it down for you because there's stages to dating. You don't just meet somebody today and decide, oh, I met somebody today and I'm about to put 100% in getting to know this person that I just met today, but I just met somebody else the day before, so I, I have no emotional investment and ties to them, but I'm going to say I'm going to— come on, people. I'm gonna go into it. I got some notes that I, I've taken, um, for you guys, so I'm going to break it down and help some of y'all get delivered because a lot of women, especially in the Christian community, y'all will meet a man today, honey, and, and, and say, you know what, what, I'm going to focus 100% on him. He ain't focused 100% on you. It— nope, Tevin, no, it don't mean, um, it's not a good idea. Why is it not a good idea if you met somebody today, then you met somebody tomorrow? So you mean to tell me that you can't go out on a date with both of them? You met one yesterday, you met one today, so you will be wrong for going out with both of them. You don't know neither one of these women. You don't know neither one of these men. So you're gonna say, I met two guys in two days, so, um, I'm not going to go out on a date with them because it's bad to go to date multiple people and you have— you just met them back to back. That's what I'm talking about when I say so many people have kept themselves in bondage because of how they think. Well, oh, Noob 7 said I responded too quick. I know you did, baby, because you don't understand my definition of what dating is, and most people don't understand what dating is. That's why— think about this, and I'm gonna leave y'all with this, and I'm gonna break this down a little bit further. If you think way back in like the 1800s, 1700s, the women back then had multiple choices. Their fathers used to throw these big balls so that the suitors could come and so she could pick which one she wanted. She would dance at the ball with these men in her beautiful dress. She had a tassel and she also had a little booklet right there on her arm where she could keep notes and she could take notes collecting data on all of the suitors that came. So I'm just saying, James, I'm not going to explain it all now. You got to tune in this Thursday for Relationship Thursday at 7— I'm at 10 PM Eastern Standard Time and 7 PM Pacific Standard Time. Some of y'all are holding yourself up because y'all sit there, he who finds a wife, as soon as— especially if you had no dating forever, the dude that you meet today, he— it's like, oh Lord, I met somebody, and you just automatically, that's my husband. Not realizing just because somebody chooses you does not mean you're not supposed to have options. Oops. With that note, I'm getting out of here. Nope, no teaser. I gave— that was all the teaser I'm gonna give you. James, because y'all been holding y'all selves bondage. And not just in the dating arena, but also in life. In life, you're holding yourself up because— what do I always teach you guys? Your belief system is the very thing that's holding you back. Facebook, make sure you tune in this upcoming Thursday at 10 PM because I got something for you. Oh, and there's something else I want to share with you too. I'm giving away— I'm having a contest. I'm giving away something free, but I'll tell you about it right after this commercial break. Relationship Thursday, and we're back. I hope you guys got to see those commercials. So I'm having a contest and I'm choosing a name for my new blog. So I, I'm going to be giving away Manifest, and I'll do another short video so you guys can see it, but I'll be giving away my course Manifest for the person that can come up with the best title for my empty nester blog. Because, well, it's an empty nester blog and we're working on a television thingy thing that I really can't talk about at the moment, but we've been looking for names and nobody has given us a great name. So I said, you know what, maybe I can get some other catchy little names, um, from my audience. So whoever gives off the— give me the best name, you win. So I'll make a post about this in a second and post it above this video. So Instagram, do not inbox me. You got to go to Facebook, MS April Mason, to participate. And, um, I will— we'll see who gives the best one, and you get my, uh, my, one of my courses. So love you guys, gotta go. A sister got work to do, just got work to do. So take care, see you on Relationship Thursday where we will be talking about is it okay to talk date multiple dates once can be risky because some sex on the— oh, dating don't equal sex. So it's just because some sex, that don't mean that's you. That's— you might not have no penis control or vagina control. That— it's like y'all always worried about everybody else and what they doing, where you ain't worried about yourself. So what other people's going to sleep— sleep with other folk on the first date? If that's what they want to do, that's what they want to do. But at the end of the day, you are only in control of you. If you think sex equals— if you think dating equals sex, yeah, you need to talk to me. I, I see y'all on Thursday because, yeah, see y'all later. Bye.