Leave Steve Harvey alone, those women were WACK!

Hey y'all, it's Friday. Happy pre-Valentine's Day. I just woke up. I took a nap. I posted a video earlier, the one below here, this one. If you look down below, you'll see a video that I posted, uh, we shared about Steve Harvey's guest that he had on the show. And I woke up a little while ago, headed to my son's, you know, soccer game, and I'm reading some of the comments, right? And see this, I, I wasn't gonna say nothing. Folks was calling me today saying, asking me had I seen it. April, you should do a video, you should talk about it. I wasn't gonna talk about it. I was just gonna— I just wrote my thoughts. If you look above the video, you'll see what my thoughts were. However, something just bothers the crap out of me. Hold on, let me take— you know how they do at church, take your gum out, take your gum out. Um, here's the deal, folks are blaming Steve Harvey for bringing these women on to represent black women in the wrong light. Let me let you understand something. Steve Harvey has had successful Black women that represented us right on the show. The problem is people don't remember that. You remember the negative quicker than you remember the positive. So all of this, why, why couldn't he have somebody like Michelle Obama and all of these? Yes, he does have women that represent us right on the show. You just don't remember that because, like I said, People remember the negative faster than they will remember the positive, okay? And number 2, please kill the, the Black gender race card, or however you want to call it. Well, you know, Black women, you know, this why he always, you know, trying to hook Black women up, because they feel like we not this and we not that, and, and he always picking on— no, stop picking on yourself. There's, there's raggedy people in the Black community in the white community, in Hispanic community, in Asian community. It is whack people everywhere. The problem in our community is we like our stuff kept behind closed doors. We were taught you don't tell the negative, you don't tell the bad stuff. That's how it is in our community. As someone who is, um, a molestation awareness activist, I counsel a lot of women that have, um, that are 30, 40, 50, even up to 80 years old. About being molested. And the one thing that they all have in common is, well, you know, we told not to say anything because we don't want to get nobody in trouble. You know, you don't put— bring shame on the family. To hell with that. If them chicks was raggedy as hell, they were raggedy as hell, whether they were white women or whether they were black women. The reason why it rubs us the wrong way is because we only remember the negative part. And so when that comes out, why we got to show that? Well, why didn't y'all remember the good stuff that he did? Why didn't you remember the wonderful women that represented us Black women well on the show? You ain't gonna remember that, but you will protest this part of it, just like in our community. Well, our Black men may get in trouble, but y'all want to protest and get mad when they show some of the, you know, the Black men doing certain things, but y'all won't remember the good stuff that they do and and don't give him praise for that. So is it really Steve's fault that you don't remember or you failed to acknowledge the positive women that he has shown on the show? That says a lot about you, not Steve. I'm just saying. What happened, Dana? Dana, look at the video below, honey. You know, somebody say, what they fussing about now? They always gonna be fussing about, about stuff. But it's in our culture, we are taught to not show the negative. We're shown to always want to be shown in a good light, but all y'all are not folks that need to be in the good light. We gotta act like you want to be treated. So these women— so they'll give you all a little brief, brief on it that haven't watched the video yet. Two women went out on dates with two guys that were, um, in disguise. So they weren't— they weren't necessarily most attractive, but they did have good personalities. So these women kind of dismissed these men and acted like they didn't matter and all of that, right? So it wasn't until they found out, you know, that these folks, these men had some money that they changed their attitude. But the very things that they said they wanted, because it didn't come in the package that they wanted, they acted real disrespectful. See, I'm like this. I have gone out on a blind date or I've gone on dates with guys that I may not have necessarily been attracted to. But I did not treat them in a dismissive manner. I did not treat them with disrespect. We actually had a really great time. It was so funny. My best friend texted me when she saw the video. She said, you know what, the funny thing is you and I would have fun with those guys. Yes, we would have, because you don't treat people bad because you might not be attracted to them or they might not be your type. That's not the measuring stick for if you gonna treat people with respect. So yes, that kind of disturbed me, but they didn't want that. You know, some of the women on my post below didn't want that to be seen. Well, I had to— I was— somebody say, well, I'm tired of them making it look like we gold diggers. No, they were gold diggers. You can't— people can't make you look like what you are, baby. People can't make you look like that. Whatever in you, no matter what your platform, it will come out. Some said, well, they did it for, you know, to get press for their business. Well, I'm a successful businesswoman, and there's no way in hell that I'm going to intentionally get on TV and look crazy, be disrespectful, and be classless, and I tell people I'm a businesswoman. There's no way. I'm not gonna do it. So for those of you that get upset, and then, oh, we got those ones trying to turn the table, but we don't know if they were good men. See, stop trying to deflect. If these people are bad people, let them be bad people. Own your stuff. And for the Black men that say, see, this is why we date outside our race, you don't need that as an excuse to date outside your race. That was two women. There are millions of Black women in this country that don't act like that. So I don't, I don't even want to hear that as your excuse. If you want to date outside your race, do so. Because if that's the case, we could use Black men are raggedy, Black men don't want to work, Black men ain't got no vision, Black men want to live up on you, they all sell drugs. All that, we could use that as an excuse to not date y'all too. But we don't all do that. Yes, Vernon, using the race card, I can't stand that. And it's like, women, I hate to say it, but a lot of y'all are raggedy as hell. You, you, I mean, even though this was on the Steve Harvey Show, a lot of people don't, would not want to, um, acknowledge that you act like that. If some, if you find out he, oh, I got a blind date, he ain't that attractive, he ain't, you will act like that. And you see We so quick to point the finger at what everybody else is doing. If I just having conversations with men now, ever since I did that video about I'm pissed, the one that I did back in January that I think we had a million views now, my inbox has been flooded with black men and I've been listening to their stories. I might not have had a chance to respond, right? And I'm sorry, boo-boos, but I read their stuff and reading what they say gave me a whole nother view of how they actually feel about us. Some of y'all women are raggedy as hell. I don't want— I'm not getting into the men part just yet. I will do a video on how raggedy men are, but right now, baby, this is about you. They showed their natural born— well, I won't even say natural born because the blonde hair and all of the makeup and the mismatch makeup foundation that didn't go together, I mean, they— I can't say they natural born, but they showed their behinds on the show. So we have to Stop acting like people are putting us on display when you're putting yourself on display. So I, I hate to see that in our community, even, even with situations, um, it would, you know, law enforcement, with, um, you know, you know, things are going on with the police and Black folks, things that are going on in the Black community, um, are some of the stuff we have to take responsibility for. You know, our activist leaders, so-called They always want to point the blame at everybody else. But what about the fact that the police would have never been called if y'all Negroes wasn't doing what you had no business doing? What about if nobody told you to sell the drugs that was in your community? Now we got to put a reflection, I mean, a light on that. What about that? It's the same thing with this situation with this, with Steve Harvey. Nobody told you to act a fool. So you want to— we can't— we got to stop defending foolishness. We got to stop acting like our people don't act and do stupid stuff. We got to stop acting like that. I get so tired of seeing that. Well, you know, they are the Black community and no, no, no, y'all Negroes doing stuff. Stop it. Nobody told you to do that. Well, you know, they incarcerate our men at a higher rate for drugs. Why? Nobody told you to sell the drugs. I mean, I understand that people do things and the punishment for other races may not be um, as strenuous for our races. But at the same time, there's choices. You don't have to do it. So if you know you live in a country where you singled out, you don't do stuff that gets you singled out, baby. I'm just saying. I'm, I, I'm sorry, I had this— I had to say that because I get so tired of seeing that, but nobody wants to take the blame. Then you get, you know, our Al Sharptons and our— and our— what do you call him? What's the man name? Jesse Jackson, all that, you know, standing up for the community. We want our rights, but see, they don't have the power that Martin Luther King and Malcolm X and them had to change things because we gotta address the issue of what we're doing. It ain't just everybody else. And that's something that I had to teach my son. Uh, I have two sons. One will be 18 next month. The other one getting ready to be 20 years old. And I told him, as black men in America, You gotta walk a chalk line. It's sad, but it's true. So never put yourself in a position to where somebody coming to get you, you doing stuff unnecessary. Now, you do have instances where there people are doing things that, that, um, and accusing you of things you ain't doing. I ain't talking about that. I'm talking about you take responsibility for the foolishness that you do. So these two women on the Steve Harvey Show, for y'all women out there, that's, that's defending them and saying why he got to put them on display, ask yourself this: why the hell they got to put themselves on display? How about that? I'm just saying. Because even if they were not attracted to the men, you still treat them nice and with respect. You never know, they could have been a great friend. Some of the dudes from my past when I was in my 20s that I've gone out on dates with that I was not attracted to, was not a love connection, we're still friends to this day. Because we treated each other with respect, whether it was a love connection or not. I'm just saying, I had to say something. It's getting dark out here. I might have to go in here to this soccer game, but I had to stop and say something because it pisses me off. Especially folks blaming Steve Harvey for putting women on display. Why you gotta put black women on display like that? He didn't. He didn't show— tell them to get up there and show they behinds. He never— he gave them a platform. How what you do with your platform is something different. So stop it, okay? Okay, I'm just— I'm just saying, we want to see men and do— no, stop the blaming. That's why we can't get anywhere as a people and in relationship, because everybody wants to place the blame on somebody else, and it's not always somebody else. Some of y'all raggedy as hell. And it was a point in my life I was raggedy as hell until the light bulb came on and said, April, it ain't everybody else. It's you too. So quit it. And women, I gotta say this, we are always trying to find fault with the man. I get it, but there comes a time where you gotta wave. Let me see, let me get some light. Do I got some light in here? Well, you gotta wave the white flag and say, it's me, it ain't, it ain't him, you know, it's not him, it's me. So yes, we've all gone through things. We've all have dealt with, um, breakups and being treated bad and all that, but you can't stay in that same place, baby. Either you gonna say, you know what, I'm gonna give it another shot, and maybe I'm gonna approach this from a different place. That's why I always tell y'all, you have to know who you are at your core in order to be able to identify what it is that you need. If you don't know who you are at your core, you're just wasting your freaking time. Hey, oh, we got Poland in the building. Oh, thank you for tuning in, Poland, all the way from Poland. I'm just going on a little rant right now. I'm sorry— what, I'm not even gonna say I'm sorry because I'm not, because I'm sick of it. I'm sick of women trying to act like everybody is bothering them and everybody doing stuff for them, and you have that sense of entitlement. That's a spirit that needs to be cast out of you, the spirit of entitlement. Whereas the men have to do all of this, but because I'm a woman and I have a vagina and some breasts you— I don't have to do anything. I'm just saying, I can't— it just bothers me. So I, you know, I've interviewed hundreds of women, hundreds of men, and one of the things that I get with most women is I get that, uh, what do you call it, defensiveness. And it's like, what? Hey, all of us are not the bomb.com. I wasn't always the bomb.com, but I am now because I know who I am at my core. Find out who you are with your core before you think about getting on some shows and show your behind like this. Because even if you knew, if they knew who they were at their core, even though they weren't attracted to these men, they would have still treated them with respect. And they would have said, thank you so much, it was, I appreciate you taking me out, I appreciate you for your time. And they would have handled it like a lady, not like No classless chicks. I'm just saying, I had to say that. I'm sorry, y'all, if I get up all in your ear, um, this here evening, but I can't take it. So stop blaming Steve Harvey for the way people will decide to act. I'm just tired of them showing Black women. I'm tired of Black women, uh, Black women, Black men, them putting themselves in that light. So Joe could have went a whole nother different way. It could have been a love connection. And like I said, Steve Harvey— hold on, I gotta move because my connection is not— I'm way back here in the country at this school he's playing at this evening. So let me move, maybe I got a better connection right here. These women could have ended up with some— get to know these guys. Somebody said, well, we don't know if they're good guys or not, we just know, you know what— oh, this is a better connection. We just know what they had on paper. No, we don't know if they were good guys. But we'll never know because they didn't even allow them to get to that next level to say, "You know what, I would like to go out on a second date with you." So you can get to no further. So based upon what these women said that they wanted on paper, Steve had got these kind of guys. They just not were in the package that they wanted these fellas to be in. So, you can't even use that. Well, who said that they were? We don't know. They could have been abusers, they could have been liars, they could have been cheaters, but we will never know that. Because these women acted a fool to where they didn't even get to know them dudes on the other end. And also, let me say this, what also— oh, what also pisses me off is when people have to say, we don't know, they could be bad. How about they could be good? I'm sorry, yeah, it froze for us, uh, it froze for a second, uh, because the, the reception was bad over here. But, um, how come we— it has to be this or that? I'm tired of hearing people say, well, I would rather a good man that treats me right that's not the most attractive, but than a man that can provide for me and he's attractive and he beat on me? Why can't you have both? Since when do we have to choose between having good and having the entire package and having somebody to abuse you? I don't understand that. I never understood that. It's not this or that, it's this and that. So for those of you that are on my page talking about— talking that nonsense, we don't know if they this, we don't know if they that, we don't know. No, we don't know. But we don't— but what we don't— what we don't do is hope for they're both. Why not? Why can I not have it all, including flaws? When I say have it all, people, I'm talking about including the flaws that you can deal with and the flaws that you, you know, and the flaws that— not, not the flaws that you can't, because nobody's 100% perfect. So you can have 100% of what you want with, um, including the flaws. So I don't understand this. Why do we limit ourselves to, you know, I'd rather have, you know, the dude that's, you know, he's a good man, but I have no attraction toward him whatsoever. But I'd rather him than somebody that I'm attracted to that's gonna beat me. How come somebody you— how come you can't be attracted to somebody that's not gonna beat on you and treat you wrong? Change the way that you think, people. You don't always have to go to the negative. And that's, that's what this whole thing is about. Reading some of the comments, people coming down on Steve Harvey about why he put these women on his show, but you don't remember all of the wonderful, beautiful Black women that he did put on the show that had some class that he hooked up. That's not his fault. I'm just saying, you can't have it all. It's not this or that, it's this and that. Stop playing the blame game, stop playing the race card when y'all folks— I won't say y'all because I know my followers, I know you guys don't be doing stuff like that, I just know that. But Stop playing the blame game when you doing stuff to get blamed and then get mad that you get blamed. Or like I told my son, I said, son, you are now a 6'3" Black man in America. Anytime you go, you do something, I said, anytime you watch somebody in jail or, or, um, they're in court, they are being charged based upon the choices that they make. That's what's that— that's what happened. They— anybody that's in court, and, and, uh, especially if they did it— I'm talking about the innocent people because some of y'all be like, but what about the innocent one? We know that there's innocent ones. I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about people that made the choice to do wrong. They are in, and they are in court being sentenced based upon the choices that they make. So we can't be upset if that's put on display because you made the choice. Of course there's a lot of good, more good than bad a lot of times, but if we are doing more bad than good and we don't— we're not the voice to promote positivity, we quick to post, we quick to, um, repost, uh, negative fight videos all over the internet. I was surprised when WorldStar put my positive behind on, uh, on WorldStar. Big shout out to WorldStar for that. But the— in the state, in the age that we live in, uh, negative stuff gets spread quickly, more quickly than positive stuff. You can't complain if you're doing things and you get put on blast about it. I'm just saying, take responsibility and stop saying that folks are picking on you or putting— they're putting Black people on display in a certain way. When Black folks is doing stuff. Not all, but we never address the ones that are. I said, April, you gonna go around and mess up, mess, lose all your female followers. Women don't want to hear that. No, I don't believe I'll lose my female followers. I believe the group of women that I am called to are open enough to hear what I'm saying and hear where I'm coming from, to hear that it's not out of, out of hate. It's all out of love because I've been in that position. I've been that chick and be like, oh no, he's only 4 foot 11, let me get the hell out of here. And I dismiss it. So no, I don't think I'll lose my, my audience. My message is for those who has an ear, let him hear, her hear. Those that want change, they, they listen. Those who didn't think they was raggedy, they listening too. So I don't think I'll lose my, my female followers It's only those that think they still fabulous and they still getting the same bad result that don't want to listen. It's always those people, always. Oh, what, um, y'all saying what happened? Well, the, the, uh, where I am, I'm by the soccer stadium and the internet went out over here, so I had to move the car somewhere else. I have dated so many men I was not initially attracted to until after I got to know them. Absolutely, absolutely. And ladies, I gotta say this, And I, and I tell my male friends this too. Anything money can change, you don't leave a good person behind. I'm sorry, look, my little head hurting. Y'all got my little head hurting right up under there. Anything money can change. So actually, what me and my friend would have done if they were good guys the way— because the girl said on the show, they're, they have great personalities, they're this, they're that. Tanya and I would have said We would have this little, uh, deliver— uh, what do you call it— debriefing in the back. Girl, they, they really cool. I might have to— I might have to change up his dress style. And you know, he got that little thing, you know, that little hair that he trying to hold on to. I can convince him to shave that off and let him know he's just so sexy bald-headed. He got the perfect head to be bald-headed. We're not gonna run him away if we can sit there and say out of our mouth that these were great guys. We're not going to walk away because of one had a little knot on his head and the other one, I mean, they wasn't dressed the best. Money can change that, honey. You're like, honey, you know what, I love a man that wears such and such and such and such. Let's go try that out. I love a man that can do this, that, and the third. They— men don't come ready-made packages like, just like we don't. So those are things that, that can change if their core values— I keep teaching y'all this If y'all core values are the same, but yet some other things, um, you know, you can work on, those are things you can compromise on. As long as your core values are the same, you're not settling. If your core values are the same, um, you can compromise on— okay, he don't know how to dress, girl. Look at them shoes. I'm gonna have to get back. I might have to make my boo right. I'm gonna have to get him together. Those are things you can set on. But if y'all core needs match and you gonna let him walk away because he got on a little raggedy little sweater and he got the little hairpiece in the back— no, you convince him, baby, you are so sexy, I just think, you know, it would be look good on you to go bald. Let me show you, let me show you, let me show you. That's all you got to do. But they missed out on good men because they were not ready-made packages. And actually, based upon what they looking for after they came out of disguise, they actually were. So that's all I got for y'all tonight. I ain't gonna go on and on on this Friday night. I'm gonna go to his game, and then I gotta get up and go get my hair did, nails did, check into my hotel for the weekend, because I'm doing something special for me for Valentine's Day weekend. And I hope you guys, if you go out by yourself and you meet some folks, be open, enjoy everybody. You know, everybody ain't gonna be the one, but you're not looking for him to be the one. At the first— at the first— on first sight. We don't— you don't know him. I'm just saying, go out, have a good time, go get your dance on, take yourself dancing to the movies, you know, go do something, go somewhere and meet some people and be open. Because you never know, even though it might not be a love connection, it might be a life connection, somebody that can be in your life for a very long time. Majority of the— my male friends that I've met I met them all online, and to this day, if I call any of them, they got my back. Any of them. And some of them I've known for about 15, 20 years from Black Planet days. There might not have been a love connection, or some of them we didn't even connect on a love connection level. It was just, we, you know, we cool and we hang out. They can call me and talk to me about the women they dating. I can call them and talk about to them about the men, um, that I'm dating. Or I need some advice. What it mean when he do this? What it mean when he say that? That, that's the friendships that I have. And majority of them are people that I met, you know, online. And like I said, to this day, we are absolutely the best of friends. Some of them are married now. I was at their weddings. We're best of friends. So you got to quit dismissing people just because they don't fit into what you say you think you want. But if you don't know who you are at your core, baby, You don't know what you want. So I gotta go because I know my baby gonna be looking for me in the stands. I told him I wasn't going. Um, if y'all saw the video last week of me at the soccer game, I can't be doing all that coughing. And I gotta— I'm still recording the audiobook, the I'm an Asset audiobook, so I can't be coughing and sounding all rough. Y'all done pre-ordered your audiobook. I can't do that. So I got to keep my voice, um, straight. So I love you guys. Have a great weekend. And I hope I ain't got to come back. I hope Mama ain't got to come back. Some of y'all call me Auntie. I hope Auntie ain't got to come back and school you, cuz this doesn't make no sense. So stop blaming Steve Harvey. He's not the problem. How they acted on his platform and what's in them was the problem. Love y'all, bye.