Relationship Thursday with Special Guest Celebrity Chef Willie Wallace

Hello there, darlings!

Welcome to my show.

Really? Is that what we're doing?

Oh, okay.

That's what we're doing. We waiting on y'all. We waiting on you. Normally I don't introduce my guests or have my guests sitting here with me and everything. I make them make an entrance, see? But he don't want to, you know, he wants to— you gonna hit it again? Hey y'all! That didn't sound right.

Before we cook.

That didn't sound good. He didn't mean nothing by that, y'all. Hey, Jalisa. How y'all doing?

What's up, everybody?

Hey, everybody. Before I introduce the chocolate wonder of the bearded gang that I got here with me today— what they say? They say Brandy said yes. Yes. Why you saying yes, Brandy? What you see? Am I looking cute, or are you looking behind me to see, you know, a little chocolate going on? Behind me and we hitting the kitchen. Oh y'all in here! Y'all coming? Hey Damon and Avis and Shaquena— I ain't got on my glasses but I can see a little bit. I see Tiffany. You're so beautiful. Thank you so much Delisa. Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh. I got a special guest with me tonight y'all. And we about to cook up some stuff. Yeah say hi to the ladies.

Hey Melissa.

McDonough, Georgia.

All right, and all the way in Buffalo. I got stuck in Buffalo one time, it was snowing, it was snowing, I was playing ball and our bus got stuck in the snow.

Oh, that ain't good. Hey Grace, what up Auntie Eric? Hey Erica, say it back, you ain't miss you. I miss y'all too, but I've been here though. Hey Stephanie, hey, uh, Miss, uh, Ria in Miami, Angelica. Y'all know y'all gotta, y'all gotta tell me where you from. Beer, they said the Beer Gang is fresh. You know, you gotta, you gotta show, you know, you gotta let them see. Let them see. Give it to him. Well, hello you guys, thank you for tuning in to Relationship Thursday. Said Kathy Wiggins, hey April and Mr. Hands. Y'all hollering at him already. Y'all hollering. He is single though. Are you Atlanta single or are you single?

I'm single, single.

So you ain't got no—

super single.

You can put a cape on my—

you can put a cape with an S on my chest.

So you like single? You're not like Atlanta single?

I don't have nobody checking for me.

You ain't got nobody checking for you?

If I did, they'd probably be here right now. Ooh. Or trying to be here right now.

I'm just saying, ladies, there's Lansing, Michigan. Ain't that in your kind of circle?

Flint town. I'm from Flint, y'all.

Chris from Pittsburgh. Keisha from, uh, ooh, Orlando. Monica from Atlanta. Yes. Hey, Kaylee from the ATL. And Dorian from Jacksonville. Miss Ria said, dang, hello from LA.

Oh, see, this is when you're in a relationship, this is how the fun stuff you're supposed to do with your wife or your husband, your girlfriend, your boyfriend. Keep it funky, keep it fresh.

Keep it funky, keep it fresh. And one of the things that we're going to be talking about tonight is what a man looks for in a wife, but how we're keeping it funky, keeping it fresh, we're going to cook. Tonight, before we get started into all of this stuff, let me tell you who I got here with me. I have the— let me say it again— the celebrity chef Willie Wallace with me tonight. Y'all may have seen him on Atlanta Exes. He's a vegan chef and he cooks some good stuff. So tonight— oh, wait a minute, hold on, wait a minute, somebody must have— well, I gotta say it. Wait a minute, Thelma said Manifest is the bomb. That's what I'm talking about. If you guys, um, did not it. Turn— can you turn it out just a little bit, darling? If you guys did not, um, hear, my 3 bundle special released tonight— today— and Manifest was one of them. Thank you so much, um, Thelma, for letting me know that you are enjoying it. So it was the 3 bundle special of Manifest, how to change the way that you think in order to create the love, life, and abundance that you desire. Then it was the Feminine CEO, how to— how to use your feminine energy to Skyrocket to— no, how to use your feminine energy to tap into your creativity and skyrocket your income now. And the last one was how to become a high-valued classy woman. But guess what, y'all, I got something else for you. You know, I told you when your feminine energy is flowing, you get into your creativity. So I got something else for you tonight. Why you— what? Really? Really?

You so fine, boy.

You better— all right, are you talking about yourself or me?

I'm talking about you.

Oh boy, you better stop. But I gotta tell you guys this, I have another 3 bundles that's coming out September 7th. The first one is called How to Forgive, Heal, and Move Forward for Good. Let me say that again. How to Forgive, Move Forward, Heal—

I'm sorry, I'm bad.

Go ahead, finish your business. Listen, finish your business. I can't even get it out. I'll post it, I'll post it below. But I got 3 new bundles coming out. You can go to bundle 2.aprilmason.com. And it, it is actually— I got to say this— it is How to Forgive. They laughing. How to Forgive, Heal, and Let Go Once and For All. Number 2 is Second Time Around: How to Open Your Heart Up to Love and Date After Divorce. And then the last one is Purpose Made: 8 Signs to Know You have attracted your purpose mate and not just another playmate. Oh, killer! So you guys can go— oh, where you at? See, I'm just—

wait, finish.

Y'all can go to bundle2.aprilmayden.com. We got to get into today's show. He feeding us and everything like that. So we were talking, we're having a conversation about what men like in a— in a wife. And he has 3 things that he says that a man look for in a wife. I think you got probably more than that in you, but we're going to talk about the top 3. But at the same time, you guys, we're gonna cook a vegan meal. He asked what I liked and I said tacos, so we're going to cook vegan tacos. And as he said, when you're in a relationship, you got— it don't always have to— you don't always have to be out spending money to make sure that you guys connect. Just stuff like this, being able to sit back, talk, how was your day, all of that good you can do it right here at the house. So let's get right into today's show. He gonna put on some sexy music and everything. He think he's slick. You gonna put on some sexy music and stuff like that.

That's what it's about.

That's, that's exactly what it's about. Somebody said, well, damn, I want to eat too.

That's how you keep it real, real sexy in your relationship.

Yes. So, Chef, like I was telling the guy yesterday, I'm gonna let him have it.

I was telling the guy yesterday, he was like, man, you got to show me how to cook. I was like, all you need is like 4 to 5 sexy dishes.

Okay, what's a sexy dish?

A sexy dish for me is something with like seafood. Seafood is sexy.

Yeah, it's light, it won't have you all full and bloated and she gotta go to the bathroom.

So like lobster, shrimp, scallops, stuff like that. I'm vegan, so I don't eat none of that stuff, but If she, you know, eating meat and all that good stuff.

Yeah, I'm doing better. I've only had meat once this week.

And pescatarian is like, to me, is way better than just being a straight carnal person.

Okay, well, get— since— well, before we get into your top 3 things, hold on, we gonna get into why he's single. Hold on, y'all moving too fast. Y'all moving too fast.

Y'all love it all over the place.

Yeah, you know, y'all moving too fast. So I'm not— look, this is what I was telling you about earlier. It said right here. Hold on, y'all. Where'd it go? Where'd it go? Oh man, I missed it.

Say it again.

No, no, right there. Okay. Yeah. So anywho, you guys, we were talking about what men like in women. What makes a man decide that one woman is wife material and another one isn't? And he said that, um, okay, we ain't doing the seafood, catfish, and pork is saying everybody not Christian, so we're not, we're not, we're not even, we ain't even going there tonight. We, we trying to keep it grown and sexy in the kitchen. So what do you think the top 3 things that a man looks for in a wife? Not just, not just somebody he's just messing with, not just somebody he's just, you know, giving the crumbs to. We talked about the crumbs a little bit earlier. Not that, but what do men look for in a wife? What's—

I feel like I gotta bend down so I can talk because I'm tall.

Oh yeah, I'm sorry.

No, like I said earlier, I think the biggest thing is having— finding a woman with confidence, you know what I'm saying? Confident in herself, um, the way she carries herself, the way she just, you know, she can come into a room and just—

it's her presence.

Yeah, just her presence. And everything. And, um, what was the third thing I said earlier? My memory is terrible.

Um, um, you said confidence, you said intellect.

Intellect for sure.

And he said he pretty much—

yes, just being intellectual, being in the know. I mean, you don't have to be all like knowing everything or whatever, but to be able to hold an intelligent conversation with a woman is very important.

And he also wanted to add Men love a feminine woman.

Yes, please.

So, so what's your definition of a feminine woman? What is that?

I mean, just allowing a man to lead.

Oh, wait a minute. Where you leave me? Where we going?

Well, I'm about to lead you to this vegan life. That's actually what I'm about to lead you to right now. I'm just saying, that's number one. That, I mean, that's okay. That is important. That's for— that's your health right there, right?

And that's definitely important.

Somebody that's able to actually— because we as men, we need women.

Wait, wait, hold on, ladies. I need you to hear that. I need you to hear that. Come, can you come closer and say that again?

We as men, we need our women. Oh, we do, we do.

Okay, so why do you guys need us?

We need a helpmate because as a man, like, I can do some great things by myself, right? But a woman would take you to the next level.

A feminine woman will take you to the next level, not a masculine woman trying to compete and lead with, uh, that's why we call it a helpmate. Okay, somebody said you— can y'all hear him okay? Because we got the food going and we prepping. She said, oh, this is the cheese, this is the biggest, this This is the vegan cheese, right? Yep. Vegan. We have vegan cheese right here, you guys. And we have— okay, this is vegan. This vegan stuff.

I mean, no, it's salsa. Any dairy or animal products?

No animal products. Salsa, salsa, salsa. We have— what is cilantro? We have cilantro here, darlings. And we have— okay, did you make— did you—

that's guacamole.

Just regular guacamole. Guacamole. We have guacamole. What kind of vegan crumbs are you using? Oh, look at— oh, oh, he said he was pulling out the big pan for me like I'm greedy and stuff.

I mean, we using that as far as the chicken.

We're using Beyond Meat. We're not, we're not getting paid to advertise.

No, we not.

And this is what we using.

There's different variations, different brands, but can you—

can't see you. You know, how tall are you?

6'8".

He's— no wonder. No, I'm trying. I'm like, wait a minute, I know my stuff is, you know, it's right, you know, but it don't go high as that. So this is what— what is his name again on Instagram?

Chef Willie Wallace.

Chef Willie Wallace. All the ladies be on his stuff. You're on his stuff.

Oh, don't be putting my business out there.

I'm like, oh, look at this, look at them, look at them. So like I said, we were talking about the importance of You know, we're talking about femininity, masculinity, and that's how we got in kind of the conversation about, well, what do a man look for? And a feminine woman was a part of that. And he, he just said a man doesn't want a woman, you know, that is trying to lead. So what else is it that you can tell the ladies about what it is as far as a feminine woman goes?

I mean, we always want a lady to, you know, be a lady, be sexy, um because I know myself as a man, I'm always trying to keep myself up, trying to keep my beard up, you know, my fade up, making sure I'm looking good.

You be keeping your beard up. You be rubbing my beard like that.

You be rubbing my beard like that, girl.

See why you almost cave at your knees and everything. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

But I mean, like I said, the confidence is Confidence definitely got to be there, you know what I'm saying? Like, we definitely want to have a woman with confidence, but at the same time, she allows the man to be the one that leads. But we also need, like I said, we need a helpmate. We need a woman that helps us make the right decisions, you know what I'm saying? The head can't move without a neck.

That's true. But, uh, somebody said, can I borrow him tomorrow?

What am I doing tomorrow? I'm free. Borrow me for what though?

Honey, Clark, He said he free. Y'all need to know how this tastes considering giving up meat. Well, I'm gonna let you know how it tastes. He don't— he has the— well, what is this, meatless chicken? Meatless chicken, like meatless chicken. Um, hold on, we might be able to do it like this. You got it? So that's chicken. So I guess we have a chicken taco and, um, then this is our variation of beef, right?

This is not actually chicken though.

Yeah, I bought some of that. So everything is, everything is vegan, right? Everything is vegan. So I said, well, let me, let me try, let me try that. Somebody said I need a helpmate. Well, women don't really— we really don't get helpmate. We just get the man. We get the Superman. We get the hero. We get Daddy. That's who we get. We're there to help him. He's a zaddy. He is zaddy. So actually, Chef is getting ready to start his own YouTube channel, so you ladies will be able to go over there and drool over him over there.

I hope y'all tune in.

Thank you so much, Renee.

So what other— what were we saying?

Oh, we were talking about letting a man lead. What does that look like? Tell the ladies what it looks like to let a man lead.

Um, well, first of all, he got to have his shit together. Can I cuss?

Yeah, go ahead.

First of all, he got to have his stuff together in order for him to be able to lead. Um, but at the same time, like, a man might not have it all together, but they are progressing to get to that point. So as long as you see potential, you see, um, him working towards his goals— like, I'm not— I'm not where I want to be right now, you know what I'm saying? But I know—

but a woman can take you to that next place.

To that man.

And see, this is what I always thought. I believe that a man should already— a man that wants a woman should already be operating in his vision. Not, not, not—

I totally agree with that, you know.

Totally agree with that. Not— cuz we get caught up sometimes in potential where we see what you can do and you got a dream, but a lot of times ladies, you know, they don't want to wake up and live the dream, so we try to, you know, force them to do that.

And a lot of times I'm sorry to cut you off, but a lot of times men— like, I'm 35 years old, um, I just started walking in my purpose over the last 2 years, you know what I'm saying? So it takes for a man to go through some things and get to a certain stage in his life where he understands that, okay, this is what God's purpose is for me. And usually that is between the ages of like 33 to 38, you know what I'm saying, that range. So, uh, once he's able to do that and be able to hone in on that, then God will allow for him to find the right woman.

Oh, and then, and then, and guess what? You will be able to identify her. You will, because what I'm—

no question.

Is that my phone? Which is— well, yes. Uh, Keisha, you see what I'm saying? Keisha, she said smart move, April. It says smart move, April. Get the brothers involved to agree and confirm what you've been teaching. That's my whole point.

I don't—

you know, I've been doing this guy— this show for over— I stopped, I did it for a year, and then I came back. And, um, I, I know you guys hear from me, but I know you want to hear from some men as well too. And I like to bring men on that are in alignment with a man leading, or in alignment with and being okay with, uh, being a feminine woman. They're not looking for the dysfunction, they're not looking for the drama, they're looking for a purpose-made not just a playmate.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, we get to an age where we get tired, but you know, like I said, when you're at a certain age, you don't know, you know, you get tired of playing the games, you get tired of the hassle, you know, the hassle of dating. I know I'm tired of dating.

Okay, now let's— now let's get to that because somebody asked, they said, so why are you single?

Why am I single? I'm just patient. Like I told her earlier, I've been married twice before. I got married at 25, I got married at 27. I didn't know what I wanted, you know what I'm saying? Should the first marriage— we knew each other for 6 months before we got married.

So, um, I don't see anything wrong with that after you've gone and got—

I was telling you that I'm at now. No.

Yeah, I don't have no problem. I think, I think when you know who you are at your core, it don't take all day to recognize sunshine.

Because I know who I was at 20.

Exactly. So because I got married at 28 and I didn't know who I was, hence is why I'm divorced. But now, as of right now, if I met someone and our spirits connect— I always tell you guys, it's not necessarily about a look. You know, we all want somebody that's attractive to us. You know, I always tell y'all, my man got to be where I can look at him from across the room and I can say, oh yeah, all day.

Like, that's gotta— that's how it has to be, Daddy.

But—

and refuse to settle.

Refuse— exactly, refuse to settle. But at the same time, I believe that when a person gets to know who they are at their core, you can meet somebody tomorrow because it's almost like— let me see if you feel this way. For me, it's like I can't just be with anybody to the point I'm just doing something. It's almost like my spirit is in search of that other spirit to connect with. No, so I can't even— I can't even entertain.

It ain't about the flesh.

No, no, exactly.

To the point where, yeah, it's all— it's It's a spiritual connection. Once you understand that we're spirits living a human experience, then that's when you know, like, okay, what you're searching for. You're searching for that cosmic connection.

Yeah, that's exactly what it is. So I can't even just entertain anybody because it's like I have this inner— what do you call it— biological clock, this clock that just goes off and it's like, up, time's up. Yeah, you know, he's not— it's not going nowhere. And I talked to you guys about that last week, about I have an invisible timeline. I never tell the guy what the timeline is, but it's almost like I'm not even trying to use the timeline. It's just my spirit knows. It's— my spirit knows. Are our relationships failed because we're not in— we're not in our purpose? I believe so.

Yeah, I agree. Because the thing is, like I said, we keep— the helpmate is the word that that keeps coming, right? So when you find your helpmate, then you find out what God's purpose is for y'all's relationship. Marriages are like— they have these binding agreements and everything, but the purpose of marriage is to fulfill a purpose.

Yeah, you better stop saying that. You better stop talking my talk. That's why I didn't see y'all. I didn't even know. I didn't even know. I didn't even know he knew all of this stuff. I just knew he cooked it when he was halfway cute. That's all I knew. I ain't even know, I ain't even know, but you're absolutely correct. Somebody had a question about travel. Hold on, let me see if I can get back. For a brother who travels, do you find it hard to—

hard to— those features in American women? American women are raised to be independent, not wise. And yet, yes, I love black women, but there are many other countries with— okay, what kind of— I think he's talking about as far as the values of an African-American woman in America. I mean, I was raised by a Black woman, so, you know, I'm— what, when I search for— what I search for in a woman is what I see the values in my mom, you know what I'm saying? So I don't look at— I mean, everybody is raised differently, two-parent household, one parent, father, mom, or whatever. So everybody is different. So you just have to kind of meet somebody that's really on the same page. That's why communication is key when it comes to dating and figuring out like their past, how they were raised, their values and stuff like that. Because a lot of times we jump into that whole thing of being the flesh thing and that takes over and we don't even really understand who that person is. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? And then we end up in a situation.

Yeah, a couple of situations, a couple of situations, a couple of situations. So to the fellas, to Winston, about the, um American women, you're absolutely correct. A lot of us were raised to be independent, strong. I'm a strong, independent Black woman. I wrote a post last year that said, please do not address me as a strong, independent Black woman. It's not a compliment. It went viral. And of course, I got a lot of the sisters coming at me, but it was not from a place of you're not supposed to be— I call it resilient. You can be resilient, but you don't want to be strong and independent because when you say you strong, all you doing is asking for more things to be put on your back that you can be strong about. And we don't need nothing else on our shoulders, especially, you know, as women, because it's natural for us to just jump in and fix. It's natural for us to put everybody first and put ourselves on the back burner. So I stopped saying I'm strong and independent. I'm saying— I say I'm resilient and interdependent, because when I say I need a man, I'm not saying I'm needy. I'm saying, how is it that I don't need exactly where I came from? A part— half of me came from a man. So yes, you need that, just like Men need women, but you'll never hear a man say, I don't need no woman. But you will always hear a woman say, I don't need a man. And so we were having this discussion, and I'm glad he said a lot of things that he said because it's so true about the whole spirit connecting. About the person that asked about purpose, I'm gonna dig into a little bit of that, dig into that, um, a little bit more. I believe, which is part of my new bundle, Purpose Made, I believe that it's so important to find somebody whose purpose aligns with yours. It complements because I am just under the notion that relationships do not have to be hard when you find out who you are at your core, that person knows who they are at that core, which means you now know what you need. Most people don't know what they need. They sit back and they read magazines and say he's supposed to have a nice car, he's supposed to make a 6-figure income, he's supposed to, uh, be attractive. You know, those are surface-level things. At the end of the day, I'm okay. I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be a little transparent with y'all. I went on tour this year. I went through several cities this year, ended my tour, um, late spring. That tour was the loneliest time of my life. Why? Because you get off stage, you got all of these people cheering you on. Everybody want to give you a hug and kissy and talk about how they love you and how you help them, but you got to go back upstairs to your hotel room by yourself with your fuzzy socks and the Hallmark Channel. Now, did I have to do that? No. But when your spirit is looking for something specific, you can't just call randoms. Just like the song say, I got hoes in every area code. I could have done that. Every city I went in, I could have made sure that I was not by myself. But guess what? You get to a point in life where you mature. And you don't want random no more. You don't want to keep going out with people all the time. What you want to do is get yourself in alignment with who you are at your purpose, and then you start attracting. And what happens is, the more in tune spiritually you get— I ain't talking about church, I always tell y'all, I ain't talking about church— but the more you get in tune spiritually, what'll happen is people that come into your life that ain't really about nothing, your spirit, it's like even if he was like, oh my God, really instantly, yeah, you feel it, but no, you really— but then you mature enough to where you can walk away. Because what'll happen is you'd be like, oh, he fine, oh my God, you know, he got the— you know, he died in that car, and he's ideal on paper. But if your spirit isn't in tune, you'll make excuses for him and you'll stay— you'll stay with it, try to make it work. But when your spirit is in alignment, you— it's like, I don't care how fine he he is, I don't care how much money he got, I don't care what he does, none of that. It's like your spirit takes over and— I'm sorry, Derek— your spirit takes over and it just, it won't even allow you to, um, to settle. Even though your, your fleshly body was like, dang, did you— and then especially, look, okay, can we get a little— can we look— get a little grown? Especially especially if he had on some sweatpants. Lady, y'all know what I'm talking about.

I almost don't mind, but I don't want to cause no distractions on your channel. I'mma just keep it real PG.

PG, we gonna keep it PG. But when your spirit is in tune, and this is male or female, it's like, it's almost like you're not in control of your body, you're not in control of your yourself, right?

You're not.

It's like you're not in control of yourself.

No, no, no, you are in control of yourself. Okay, that's the thing. Like, you're—

when you're in tune with your spirit, gotcha, you're more in control of yourself and you can just—

thoughts and your actions and stuff like that.

And you can just bounce. So, so yes, I could have— on tour, I could have had somebody in every city. I mean, especially— but even LA, New York, all that. Oh yeah, your girl. Yeah, but I chose not to.

So fellas, If it's Taco Tuesday, okay, let's get back. You want to make a sexy meal for your, for your, for your lady?

Oh, hold on, let's, let's do it like this. Oh, we don't want to spill it, but yeah, here we go. He made me some dinner, y'all.

There we go.

Oh, here, let's put— make it— there we go. Y'all see that? Oh, kill him! I got a sexy Tuesday meal.

And it's Thursday though.

No, but yeah, it's Taco Thursday. Well, yes, well, we got some. Now wait a minute, you didn't tell us what kind of bread that was because some of us are not trying. I just use, um, is it gluten-free?

No, this is not actually gluten-free. You know, you gluten-free?

No, I just was asking, but you can find gluten-free shells.

But these are just some small street tacos. These are flour shells and I fry them. That's my secret. Don't tell nobody. Don't tell nobody.

It says, but you had to learn those things. I— wait, what's that? You're absolutely correct, I had to learn those things. But guess what? The reason why I'm doing what I do when I come live is we got to start somewhere. We always talk about what the problem is. I don't like town hall meetings and panels to talk about what the problem is. The reason why I come and talk to you guys is because my goal is to be a help, be a solution as much as I possibly can versus dwelling on what's wrong. I, and I, and I guess for me, when I get messages from my, in my inbox from men, from black men that say, watching you caused me to want to date black women again, man, That right there, that says I'm doing, you know what, that says, oh, I get that all the time. Because you got to understand, if women have been taught to be independent, you know, and be masculine, some men, they get, you know, they think, I'm tired of that.

Ah, what men have to, black men have to understand is that we as black people, period, we're gods, right? And our black women are goddesses. Is God when they act like it, when they act like it, when they understand that. So here you go, I made you a plate too. But once you understand that, you know, then you— it's like you, you almost owe that to yourself, and you owe that to your, your heritage. You owe that, you know, to our women, you know what I'm saying? Like, I couldn't— I could never date outside my race.

I couldn't.

I love my Black women too much.

Oh, okay. Yeah, bring it into that because all the ladies want to know. All ladies want to know. Hold on, hold on, taste your food after you ask me a question. Okay, I'm gonna taste your food, but I gotta, I gotta, I gotta get you right.

I get hot in the kitchen. You get hot in the kitchen.

Okay, so all the ladies want to know, Chef, What kind of woman does Jeff look for?

Confident, classy, beautiful, smart, intelligent. Um, she's got her shit together, just all the way put together.

But going about the other piece we talked about, about, um, entrepreneur.

Oh yeah, yeah. Oh, one big thing with me, I am an entrepreneur myself. Myself. So my schedule is sporadic. It's good, ain't it?

Food to make her dance. Food to make her dance.

So I mean, you really have to— for me, I have to date somebody that's doing the same thing that I'm doing. She has to be an entrepreneur. Yeah, she has her own purpose, and I have my own purpose, and then we have our purpose together. You know what I'm saying? So I couldn't date— I really just couldn't date anybody with just a regular 9-to-5. I just couldn't. Even if she did have a 9-to-5, I'm not ruling that out because it could be something that is holding her back to her at what she's an asset for. As far as making her—

he used my term. He don't even know he used my term. He don't even know my book is called Are You an Asset? No, for real, like, he didn't know that, y'all.

I did for, uh, Ricky Rosé. Like, I became an asset to him when I introduced him to vegan food because I know he likes to eat healthy. So I was like, you know what, I'm gonna make myself an asset. They talking about the asking. I'm in Atlanta.

Where's he located? At the house, cooking like this. Okay, y'all. It's good, it's good.

It's, it's definitely, um, she's speechless over here, y'all.

Yeah, I told you, food will make her dance. Well, get some bands, give a sister some food, and I'm all yours. Oh, okay.

So y'all looking at your new co-host? Yes, I accept. I accept.

But he was so on point when he talked about, um, being an entrepreneur, wanting somebody that's, that's, um, in the same arena. And this is so important because this goes back to knowing who you are at your core. Oh, what, boy, you better stop this. You know my knees is bad, I can't go all the way down. Me too.

I mean, my back get hurt.

Yeah, look, I didn't have back surgery, so I can't—

if I fall out of over here.

You got insurance? You got any insurance for something? Because I'm from California, we sue for everything. So when you said about being connecting with somebody that's like-minded, this goes back to knowing who you are at your core. It's very hard for me to date someone that does not— that's not an entrepreneur, only because they get off at 5 o'clock.

Right, then they look at me like, where you at?

Why you ain't call me back? It's not that I don't want to, right? When I get in my zone, it's like— and I need him to be in his own. One of the things I like about being in a relationship with somebody that's busy is that you can be busy, he can be busy, and we all get together later on that night or maybe the next day. It makes you— it makes you—

and then you put the phones down.

Yeah, you put the phone down and you get Taco Tuesday and Thursdays and yeah, all of that. So I like that. And ladies, that's why I always tell you that it's so important for you to be on purpose because actually— what are you doing? That wrong? Actually what it does— did I get too fast? Yeah, he got to go fix himself. Actually what it does when you get on purpose and you ain't sitting around You ain't sitting around waiting on somebody. It makes the relationship a lot— it makes it fun, you know, because it's like I get to, I get to see you do your thing, you— I'm doing my thing, and you know, we talk in the morning. Hey babe, what you doing? We text or whatnot. Hey honey, I probably won't see you till later on the day, or let's get together. Or one of the things, uh, one of my relationships, what, what made it so— what made our relationship real sexy is At one time he was like, where you gonna be? I said, well, I'm gonna be, you know, in New York. He was like, well, I gotta be on in Cali. Oh, they all like to get a kiss with this chocolate, that milk chocolate, y'all. But he was on one coast, I was on the next coast, and, um, it was like, it was, it was real sexy because what we ended up doing was we met in Miami because he did his thing for a couple of days, I did my thing for a couple of days. And he was like, babe, you know what, I ain't seen you in about 5 days, you know. And we went and we met up in Miami. So it was really good, you know, to do. So for me, I'm with you on that entrepreneurship thing. That, that, that goes to knowing who you are. And for those that's getting ready to say, because I feel it in my spirit, what if you don't know who God got for you? Think about this. If God could give you someone that works a 9 to 5 which is what you really ain't wanting, or for me, little itty-bitty kids, what you really ain't wanting. He can turn around and give you somebody that actually fits.

He will give you the desires of your heart.

Absolutely.

Speak it. It's a law of attraction.

Yes. And so when you understand that part, you'll stop settling. I always tell you there's a difference between, um, settling and compromise. Settling is like my friend, um, Joe said— no, I say settling. Joe said comprom— how do we put it? He said the difference— this is what it looked like. Settling— compromise is round peg, round hole. You wanted a blue one, but you got a pink one. But guess what? They're still round and they still fit. Settling is round peg— no, square peg, round hole. And you trying to jam that bad boy in there because you want it to be what you want it to be.

Where is this conversation going? I stepped away for just a second. I heard that. Go ahead, finish.

See how you do, see how you act. So it's okay to compromise, but you got to understand there's core things that you have. As like, like our topic was, what do men— top 3 things men want in a woman. And most men that I ask, they say the same thing. They want a confident woman, they want an intellectual woman, they want a feminine woman. And when you say a a feminine woman, that encompasses a whole lot of things. Because a feminine woman, she's normally a wise woman, because the fact that she's even tapped into her femininity says a lot about who she is. In this day and age, most women don't tap into their femininity at all because we've been programmed to— this is what we've been programmed— we've been programmed to believe that y'all not gonna take care of us, that y'all not gonna be there.

So, and that's, and that's, that's the thing, you know what it is, is deeper than that. That goes to what, um, like how America tries to condition— like they try to hold it because they know how powerful we are as Black men. So they try to condition our minds to think that we're less than what we are. They put us in jail, they kill us, and things like that. And so, I mean, Black women, of course, they have fear because of stuff like that. It's hard for us— it's hard for men to get jobs, so they out in the street hustling.

So they ain't gonna be able to take care of us.

Yeah, they're afraid that he not— might not even come home, you know what I'm saying? So it's way— it's, it's, it's so deep. It's so deep.

Antonia said, Willie, I see you, boo.

What's up, Antonia?

So you're absolutely correct. So that's why when, when a man finds a feminine woman— and I got to add this— a man knows how to treat a feminine woman, because so many of our brothers are are so used to drama that when they come across a woman who actually knows her role, they don't know how to treat us. I've experienced that too. That's true. I've experienced—

but if they know how to— if they have a great relationship with their mom, you know how to treat her.

And that's, that's, that's the issue too, because I've, I've seen guys that had guys that didn't— their mom talked crazy to them and all that, so they end up wanting to get women just like that.

And they're addicted to that relationship. If you have— if a guy's in a great relationship. Like, my mom is one of my best friends. I can talk about anything.

That's how my boys and I are. Like, my son, he'll call and I'll be like, William, I don't want to know anything sexual. I don't. He's like, all right, Mom, check this out. My roommate's sister— my— he— but just before he got married, my roommate's sister— I was laying in my bed, Mom. I was minding my own business. That's how he moved. I'm minding my own business, Mom, and I wake up, Mom, and then, you know, my roommate's sister is sitting on— she looking— sitting on the bed looking at me and I was sleeping and my door was locked. I said, son, you don't piss where you eat. Don't bang your roommate's sister. I said, you don't, you don't want to do that. And so, um, about, about a month later, about a month later, I hadn't heard anything. I was like, William, what happened with the girl? He's like, Mom, Mom, she— Mom, I was in the bathroom. I was in the bathroom again by myself and she— I'm doing something, she comes skirting behind me me in front of me. And Mom, I had to— and that was it. That's all I thought he was going to say. Then he comes with a question. I said, he said, Mom, I gotta ask you something. I said, what? He said, why is it that women are wanting but they can't take it? I said, call your daddy. I don't want to hear none of this conversation. I said, I don't even know what you working with. I don't even need to visualize anything. So my— that was the kind of relation, the kind of conversation that particular son, um, is. My kids are very—

I don't have those type of But that is hilarious.

Yeah, his, um, his, his, his wife said, why you always talking to your mama? He was like, if it wasn't for my mama, I wouldn't be with you because she trained me right. So I'm gonna call her. He ain't no mama's boy though, I won't allow that. But, but yeah, having that conference, having been able to have conversations, um, with your children are good. Okay, Ava says, why are men 50+ years old having issues committing?

I don't know, because I ain't 50 plus years old, so I couldn't even answer that.

She said we need— Angelisa said we need our straight Black men.

That's true. We got a lot of undercover brothers out here. What does that say? That one, that's a lot.

It says some men treat their mom like queens but doesn't know how to treat a woman in a relationship because their father didn't treat their mom. That's true. That's so— that's, that's very true.

But you know what though, at the same time though, like, you have a choice.

Curse too.

That's, you know what I'm saying? Like, you can, you can go through life and see your mom being treated a certain way by your dad or whoever she might be with when you were growing up, but then you can either, you know, break that— what is— oh, I'm sorry, I'm gonna drink a little bit. You can break that, um, generational curse by simply making a better decision, you know what I'm saying? You don't have to, uh, go down that same path of, you know, your dad being an alcoholic or your mom being a pothead or a crackhead, you know what I'm saying? So you can make that conscious decision to do better, you know what I'm saying?

Now, you're absolutely correct, and I want to get back to this top 3. Is sex anywhere in there in the top 3 things men look for? Where does that play?

Oh, that's, that's my bad.

Okay, but wait, before, before he answered that, I got this new button, y'all, and I want to see if it works. Facebook then gave me some, some buttons, so I'm gonna see if it worked and I'm gonna come right back. And he gonna answer this question about, is sex really one of the— is sex one of the top 3 things? I'll be right back, y'all. Let's see. Can you push this? Because my nail— that, that button right there.

This one right here?

Yeah. And we're back. Oh yo, I got the ability to put commercial breaks up in there. I just wanted to see what was going on. I was like, what is this button? What is this button? I'll see. But see, when you do commercial breaks, I saw the number going— oh, and a number back up, number back up. So anywho, we were talking about sex. How important is sex?

It's very important.

Is it in the top 3 of what men look for in a wife?

I mean, yes, I would definitely have to say that. 'Cause if you— the sex is very important.

So we got 5 there, not just 2.

Yeah, we got 5. That's 2 of the 5. Sex is very important when it comes to relationships, marriages, things like that, because if you're not sexually compatible with somebody, then you know you're gonna be unhappy, and then the person starts to look for— they start to look at porn, they start to look at it in other people, co-worker, or whatever, whatever they're not getting at home. So, you know, I think that's another discussion that a lot of couples need to have as far as like, you know, what are they into, you know what I'm saying? Like, you got to have real conversations nowadays, right?

I'm— go, you keep talking.

Oh, my bad. Um, so yeah, sex is important.

Sex is important.

Sex is patriarchy.

Now, do you— one of my good friends Rodney Perry. We were doing a radio show. That's that. We've been friends for like 17 years. That's like my—

that's dope.

That's my week. From the day— from the days when he was wearing this, wearing the same suit at the Hollywood Park Casino in Inglewood. I would be there every week. And, um, it was him, uh, Joey Rails, D-Ray Davis. Like, I remember when I used to sit at the bar and we— I would just look— I would listen at the bar, look listen to all of them jokes, and I'm just like, y'all so raunchy, why y'all so nasty? You know, so I remember them back in the day. But one day, one thing he told me, he said, if you can make love, you can make up. He said, because it's only when you get to not being able to make love, uh, that it don't work no more.

Yeah.

And so I saw—

and then another thing too, I think it's important where guys feel like, um, okay, so I'm with my wife, right? So let's say you're my wife. They feel like, okay, I need to respect my wife and all that stuff and not do the nasty shit that they really want to do because that's my wife, you know what I'm saying? But then like they might go get a— they might be seeking something else and they go get a side chick or something like that. They'll do all the nasty stuff with them. It's like, do that with your wife.

Okay, and you have— you absolutely correct because this is what happened when I was married. My husband ended up having— we found out he had a porn addiction. So I figured it out finally. And so I said, well, I'll watch porn with you, right? But that made him like, don't want to watch it with you.

People got to be real with themselves, right?

Because what it is, is men put the mask on, right? And what he did was he viewed me as this— that's my flower, I don't want her to be tainted. But if that's what you into, let me see what's keeping you down and garage, you know.

Mr. Watson in the garage.

Yeah, I'll never forget my son got on the computer, right? And my son, he was in the like third grade then. He ran in the room, Mom, Mom, I turned on the computer and it was a bunch of booties just shaking on the computer and they were just popping up, Mom, and I can't stop it from popping up. I promise you, I promise you, Mom, I wasn't looking at what I was supposed to look at, Mom, but it just popped up. I was just trying to turn on the computer and do my homework and it's just booties everywhere, Mom. And I promise you, please don't put me— I wouldn't own it.

When I found it, I was like, totally different reaction. I'm like, oh, what's this?

But then with the sex part though, a lot of women— because I end up coaching a lot of women with sexual issues because of how they were taught. So I get that all the time.

Some women are just inexperienced, you know?

Yeah.

Men too, but that's where— but that's why I said that's where that communication piece comes in. If it's something that you like, you got to talk about that, and they got to be willing to learn or to explore if you are an explorer, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, because it's interesting. Like, I had a woman that her husband had an issue with the strip clubs, but he wanted her to strip. But she— sometimes we put on some weight and we don't feel like all sexy. But y'all don't always— y'all don't be paying attention to the extra rolls and stuff like that. Y'all don't love that.

Like, I want some— something to grab onto. I'm a grown-ass man.

And all right, and all right, and all right, and all right. Um, but, but that's what— that was her issue, and she didn't want to, you know, get freaky for her husband.

Yeah, and it's like, dude, you got to do that. You got to— you got to spice it up. You got to do whatever. Y'all, if y'all got to put a stripper pole up in the bedroom, you got to do all of that. The sexy lingerie, pop your ass on them. Like, if it's stuff that you know that he like or he secretly liking or whatever, pop up on that ass and do some of that stuff. For real, just keeping it 100.

I'm, I'm definitely, um, Um, oh, oh, my freaks is coming out. See, y'all be acting like y'all innocent when I'm on here, but when I bring— when I bring it, I noticed that when I bring a male man on, something happened with the ladies and they be talking about like somebody talking about orgasms and all that. One of, one of my friends I brought on, he did this little erotic poem and they was like, yes daddy, yes. Y'all don't be doing all of that. Y'all be wholesome when I be on by myself, but let the man come on and y'all y'all mind. Somebody said size doesn't matter, you have to be confident in what you do. That's a lie from hell. But anyway, I'm not even gonna— we're not even gonna— I don't know who— I don't know who said that. That came out before— that came out before I thought about it. But who said size don't matter? I, I don't know who said— yeah, bless your heart. Yes, that is Kim. Kim, that is Willie. That is Chef Willie Wallace. We have made dinner. We've been talking about, um, you see how I segue? See how I segue? See how I segue?

I'm not the bad influence. Somebody else told me to pour this.

Hey, Adrian! What is this? No, you know what? I'm gonna stick with my water. Cheers! Damn! So yeah, size matter. I don't care what nobody say.

That's true.

Size matters because it could be too big and too small. Yeah, we're gonna have to have a midnight, a midnight after dark.

Certain people got to be asleep. Some of y'all followers, some of y'all gotta be asleep because we might do this at like 1 AM or something like that.

Oh, they said you trying to do a Bill Cosby on me. Don't drink it.

You watch me pour it.

Oh my goodness, he's trying to do a Bill Cosby. But yeah, we have to have that conversation late night. Uh, I normally have that conversation on my Instagram though. I, I do go on Instagram around 2, 1, 2 in the morning sometime, and I'm logging in, and we get a little— it get a little explicit because folks ask questions. Now, all that you see of Miss Mason, she's a feminine woman, she's a woman about her business, she's very high value. She was talking about it.

She was talking about weight. You were talking about weight.

I was talking about weight. Somebody— see, that's what I'm saying. Somebody— that's what I'm saying. They always do that when a man is on. They don't, they don't, they don't misconstrue my words. Uh, yeah, I could do BET Uncut now. Don't, don't get it twisted. Now there's, there's another side. There's another side. But for the, for the person that said the size don't matter, um, I immediately You took it because we was talking about sex and whatnot, and, um, um, yeah, and I thought that's what you was had said. And yeah, that. So anywho, we have 10 minutes. Is there anything that you believe the ladies should know? You are so much taller. You're 6'8". I actually dated a guy 6'8". Me before, and I'm only 5'4".

Oh yeah, you know, guys, tall guys love shorter girls.

You know, I found out why.

It's fun size.

Oh my God, everybody calls me fun size.

Yeah, you're like a pin top, you know what I'm saying?

You can spin it. No, I had one guy tell me before we went out, he looked at me, he said— and he was about 6'5", 6'6". And I, I tend to attract taller guys, and so I was like, why are you looking at me like that? And he said, you're the perfect height. I said, okay, what's the perfect height? Perfect height for what?

I would never tell somebody like—

no, no, he was literally sizing me up though.

Yeah.

So I said, I'm the perfect height for what? He said, I can bend you over and I don't even have to get on my tippy toes or nothing. You like—

perfect stuff like that where guys— yeah, raunchy, like, wrong, out of nowhere, right? To where like, if I come as a gentleman and say something to you like, hey, your hair is beautiful, you might And I'll be like, oh, it's mine, it's mine. But sometimes, you know, women, they get turned off by, you know, a guy even just trying to have a conversation. I could be like, hello, how are you? And then because somebody might have said some crazy shit the other day, you know.

Yeah, but we can't treat every guy the same.

Yeah, but women do that though.

That's true, that's true. So did you— oh, you— did you answer the question about why you're single? Because they were like— I think they were still waiting. I want to know.

Yeah, I'm just I'm just a patient man. I'm just— I'm working on— I'm working on my business right now.

So— oh no, you go— wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, because they've heard me talk against that.

What?

Hold on.

I am— I'm worried. I'm okay focusing on myself.

Okay, okay.

I've been in relationships and married since I was 19.

Okay, that's different. You're a little different. But you can't— but for those that— I'm saying, they said April, date him. I should date 35. 35. So here's the thing, when people put— when people say, I have, um, I'm married to my business, I'm in my business, if you were in— if you were married, you'd be doing the same thing, but you just learned how to balance.

Oh yeah, no question.

But I think it takes that one person to come in and makes you want to. Yeah, women, women will make—

I mean, women, y'all don't understand how much power y'all have. Y'all can make a man do whatever.

Yeah, we can inspire y'all to do whatever we want y'all to do. Why am I dancing this evening? I think y'all, this is the first time I've ever done something, um, on location and actually standing up, um, because normally I'm sitting down. Please bring on Big G of Silk. Oh well, let's figure it out. What I'm trying to do is You guys, I had the idea about a month ago. Tell me what you think. I had the idea about a month— what, are you gyrating behind me?

I'm not even— I'm like, I got a space in between us.

See, they can't, they can't see that. They like that much space between us. All I saw was—

I'm like, wait a minute, I'm going to be back here looking like I'm shorter though. Head look a lot bigger though.

So this is what I've been thinking about, you guys. Um, I was talking to, um, well, I don't know what to call her. She, she my executive assistant, project manager. What we was all— we, we were having a conversation. I said, I'm thinking about doing something, a show called The Lady and the Gents. So you guys have been getting pieces of that. So the week before last, I had Damian Hall on from Guy. Tonight I have celebrity chef Willie Wallace me. I've had, um, what's up, Deanna? Uh, Rodney Perry on with me. I had my good friend Jack A. Daniels from the show Black Love. Uh, I've had Titus Unlimited, uh, who broke the internet with his, with his sexy self. So what do you guys think? Do you think I should do a Lady in the Jits kind of show and bring you some of the most incredible brothers to show you that there are brothers out there that are actually doing something about that life? And, you know, to kind of show how they see love and view love and all that, because we need each other at the end of the day. We need y'all to protect us.

You know what's crazy? She's so beautiful, I ain't hear a word she said. I was just watching her talk the whole time. Yeah, you right, you right, you right, you're absolutely right. No, for real. No, yeah, I agree.

You don't know what I said.

No, I agree, I agree. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right, babe, you're right.

That makes a great husband. Yeah, that make that, you know, that, that, man, take notes.

That was just an example. I want y'all to take notes, like for real.

So it, I don't, I look, I don't know, I forgot what I was saying at that point, you know. He talking about I was beautiful and everything like that, you know. I'm just saying, he done fed a sister and see, see, see No, when you got your boo after a night like that, you get fed, y'all sit here, make this, uh, dinner, might wash a little dishes together, then y'all go sit on the couch or go, go, go— oh, that's what you do next? Is that, is that what happened next? Is that, is that what happened next? So I get back to what I was saying, um, about having um, some gentlemen on, uh, but y'all say bring them out, bring them out. Yes! So you guys gotta let me know who you would like, um, to come on the show. I think he won't— you want— you think he won't deserve— he didn't already stole some— a kiss and already stole some chocolate. They say they love your laugh. All right, 4 minutes. So we're getting ready to get out of here because we end in 4 minutes. I'm so glad it has the timer. So we end in 4 minutes. So tell the people where they can find you.

Um, well, on Instagram, my Instagram handle is Chef Willie Wallace. That's my brother. He just came out of nowhere.

What? You was about to get— I was about to say, is my gun in my— is my gun in my, uh, in my, in my bro? You just— I was like, oh, wait a minute. You know, I'm a hood, but I'm a refined hood. But you know, I can get back. I'm just saying, he scared me.

My Instagram is Chef Willie Wallace, so follow me. Chef W-I-L-L-I-E Wallace, W-A-L-L-A-C-E, just regular. Uh, my Instagram is just— no, I'm sorry, my Facebook is just Willie Jamal Wallace. I'm working on my website, so y'all just look out for that. I'll be posting on Instagram like crazy.

So, and he's getting ready to do, um, his his YouTube. So he'll be doing some, some, some— I don't want to call cooking, not chef.

I'm gonna be, you know, on my website and on YouTube, I'm gonna be showing people how to make some simple, quick, easy meals. Like, it didn't take me long to cook those vegan tacos.

So yeah, we cooked all of— he— well, I said we like I did that. We, we did all— did I do anything? But I did it. So all of this in less than an hour, I'm saying.

So when she get off camera, she's ready smash.

So yeah, yeah, I kind of keep my lipstick right for y'all because y'all be, y'all be talking crazy. Y'all be finding stuff. Why she got cheese on her lips? Hell, I was eating.

Exactly, exactly. So, and men— women, I'm gonna listen to— listen to this. Men love to see a woman eat, like to see a woman chow down. Don't be acting all pretty.

Oh yeah, I don't do that no more. No, I order off the menu.

That shit Lord Jesus. He's—

oh, y'all, you know what, Zaniah, you need to quit. Oh Lord. Anywho, I love you guys. Thank you so much for tuning in. And let me know— thank you so much for coming on. Let me know who you would want, who you want to have, to have on The Lady and the Gents, because I've been bringing you some of the most I would say some of the most handsome, intelligent brothers out there. I'm just saying, you know, y'all like the beard gang. I think I had one on with the beard, y'all was losing it about the beard gang. He got— I think I might kind of like your beard though, you know, that it don't look all taco meat-ish and nappy and stuff, you know.

And I'll take care of it.

It looked like you use Fananza, you know, conditioner.

Now I get people sending me beard stuff all the time, so I keep it right.

Alrighty, you guys, see you later. Love you, and What else? Goodbye. See y'all.

Holla.