The Feminine Ear LIVE Call in Show

Well, hello darlings, April Mason here, and welcome to The Feminine Ear, where men are seen, heard, and understood. How y'all doing? I missed you guys last week. We didn't have a show last week due to the election, and but we're back, we're back, we're back, we're back. Fellas, if you would like to call in or join me live, make sure you click the link right there in the comment section or visit the thefeminineear.com, and you can join us right here. We want to hear what you have to say. This is a safe space, ladies. You know the rules, you know the house rules. We don't sit here and talk negatively. We don't take shots, we don't take aim, because at the end of the day, you can't say that you want men to open up, but if someone says something that you don't like, or if they don't look a certain way, or if they don't articulate something the proper way that you think that they should, you're taking shots. In the comments section. We will never be able to get men to talk if that's what you're going to do. Okay, so ladies, we got the house rules. All right, we got the house rules. So as I said, we were gone last week due to the election, and we are back. And when I tell you the fellas have been sending in their letters, their emails, they in the DMs and everything. So I'm like, all right fellas, I got you, I got you. So I'm excited Matter of fact, in the comment section, if you have been enjoying The Feminine Ear, where men are seen, heard, and understood, let me know in the comment section that you are feeling the show. It looks like, um, it looks like my business coach put something in here. It says, hey love. I've never hit that button. Have you hit that button, Blake? You know what the hey love button means? Let me see. I thought it was going to be me or somebody saying hey love. Oh, we have all kind of little goodies in here. What is this one? Oh, ding. Okay, all right, all right. I thought hey love was me saying hey loves, but anywho, let's get into tonight's show. Let's get into the show. We got some, like I said, some very interesting, uh, questions. And fellas, once again, if you would like to join me live, make sure you visit thefeminineear.com. The link is in the comments section, and click the red button and you can join me live. Don't be scared, I don't bite, at least not all the time. So let's get into it. The first one, um, comes from— let's see, it comes from George. George says, Miss April, I'm reaching out because I feel like I'm at a crossroads in my life and marriage, and I don't know which way to turn. I've been married to my wife for 5 years now, and although we've had good moments, deep down we both know that our relationship was over before it really began. We got married because she got pregnant. And we wanted to do the right thing for our child. But 5 years later, it's clear that our decision was more about duty than love. We're good parents— well, excuse me, we're good partners in parenting, and I truly respect her as a mother. But as a couple, we're more like roommates going through the motion for the sake of our kids. I feel like I'm living a half-life trying to be everything I think my family needs while losing myself in the process. Part of me, part of me knows I can't continue like this, but the other part is terrified of what— about— of what leaving could mean to my children. I've thought about this a thousand times. Would it be better for my kids to grow up in a home where their parents stay together even if we're not truly happy, or would they be better off with two parents who are separated but emotionally present? I don't know what to do. I'm going to miss my baby girls. However, As a man, what do I do? Okay, all right, all right, all right, all right. Well, this would be my piece of advice. As you guys know, I'm never here to tell you what to do, but off— but always offer, you know, um, maybe a more of a healthy perspective. And I've seen this play out on several occasions, right? I've seen it play out and Let me ask this, George. Do you think that your kids don't know that you and your wife are not happy? A lot of times people use the kids as the reason to stay, not realizing you're not showing the children a healthy relationship. I have been talking about this creating a love legacy thing for a very long time now. I think I first said it on a podcast a couple of years back, and I've always been— it's always been mind-blowing to me that we will do everything for our children. We'll go to work for our children, we'll sacrifice our time. We will, you know, make sure that we work extra hours so the kids can be a part of extracurricular activities, whatever it is that they need. But we don't leave them a blueprint for love. So my piece of advice would be, do you think your children don't know that you guys aren't happy? Children feel. And just because you stay in the same house for the children doesn't mean you're creating a loving environment. They don't see you guys, um, showing affection because you said you're like roommates. They don't see you showing affection. They don't see you loving on each other. They don't They don't see a healthy marriage. They see two people that live under the same roof. When was the last time that you walked up on your wife from— while she was in the kitchen washing dishes or cooking, and you just gave her a kiss on the cheek and his kids saw that? These are the things that children remember. It's not what you say. It's actually more so what you actually do that the kids remember. So ask yourself that question. Do I think the kids know? Or is it even the kids? Is it more so your own conscience? Because one of the things— now, fellas, I gotta say it— one of the things I realized about y'all is a lot of things that you do, you do to soothe your own conscience. Like, for instance, if you're a man and you only want to sleep with a woman, right, that you don't have no interest in anything else other than, I want to sleep with her, so let me see what the lowest barrier entry is. When you take her out to dinner, you're not taking her out to dinner for her and for her nourishment. You're taking it— taking her out so you can at least say, well, at least I took her to eat, right? So with the same thing with the kids, you're using the kids, you know, as, um, a psychological way for yourself so that you can make yourself feel like, well, at least I'm staying. No, that's not how that works. So the kids— take the kids out of it. The kids know what's going on, whether you think they are or not. You don't want to leave the house. You have decided what the kids are going to feel, not them, right? So this isn't even about the kids. It's not. So that would be my piece of advice, to ask yourself, are you training up your kids to see a woman loving on you correctly and your wife having a man loving her properly? What is the blueprint? If you stay in a roommate situation, what is the love legacy blueprint that you're setting up for your children? That's my question to you. See, as a coach, my job is not to tell you what to do. My job is to cause you to think, is this situation a good situation for my children to model when they are of age to date and to marry? Is this a situation that I want them in? I see it all the time. And actually, y'all, you're wasting your time because there's somebody out there perfectly for her, perfectly for him. I have a couple male friends that, that I know— well, I was to call them acquaintances— that are in the same position. One in particular, he married a woman that he had gotten pregnant, and he wanted to do the right thing. Well, fast forward years later, he wrote a book on things that women should understand about men, and he would call me complaining about her, and I wouldn't listen to it. He said, well, what do you mean? I said, I can't listen to this, and I can't support this because You knew who you were marrying. You— everything you're saying she didn't give you, you shouldn't have married her in the first place. And then on top of that, you told me you slept with other women at the bachelor party. Exactly. You told me that. So I don't— I have no type of sympathy or empathy or anything for you. So now I don't support you being a dating coach and trying to tell women what they should do when there is a demographic of women that know what to do. You just didn't choose them, so now you want to be the guru. I just don't support it. Sorry, not sorry, I just don't support it. Well, she could have did this. No, you were trying to get somebody to be something that she wasn't. So because you chose wrong, because you are the one that decided that you were going to so-called do the right thing even though you slept with women at your bachelor party and you wanted this woman to act in a particular way with you, she was never going to do it in the first place because all you guys had was sex. So from that standpoint, I told him, I said, I can't really support that. Well, you know, I'm a coach and I'm coaching these women. For what? The women aren't— what? The woman wasn't the issue. That woman was acting and showing up in the world and to you exactly, um, exactly how she was. It was you that chose her. It was you that decided to marry her. So I don't feel sorry for you. Okay, moving right along. Let's see who we have here. We have— oh, this one is good. We got quite a few. But there's one in particular I wanted to read. Oh, here. Ethan is 39 years old. Ethan. And Ethan says, Miss April, I'm struggling. I'm dating this amazing woman who's 10 years older than me. Oh, so she's my age. She's 49. Huh. And everything's perfect except for one thing. She has a much higher libido than I do, and I'm struggling to keep up. I feel like I'm letting her down, but I can't pretend to be something I'm not. How do I handle this without making her feel rejected? So pretty much what you're saying is you can't handle the 49-year-old in the bedroom. Is that what I'm hearing you say, Ethan? I don't think they warned you about women in their 40s, Ethan. Now everybody talks about you lose your sexual market value out of your 20s and all of that. That's not true because at the end of the day, the young girls don't know what they're doing. And I heard a quote, a saying that says the new broom A new broom knows how to sweep up the dirt, but a seasoned broom knows exactly where the dirt is. Ethan, they should have warned you about women 45 and over, okay? Because there's something that happens in our life that totally changes from a sexual standpoint, okay? Our libido is libidoing, and we probably can go probably multiple times than you can, even though you're 39 years old. And I'm assuming that you're a healthy young man and that you, you know, take care of yourself and you may not have any ED issues, okay? However, you should have had a talk with someone before because women over 40, 45 and over, we know what we want. We don't have time to worry about all of these other things that a lot of other, the younger girls worry about. We don't have time to worry about stretch marks and if our stomach is too big or if everything is, We don't do all of that. If we decide we want you, we're coming to get you. Okay? So I won't say reject her. You don't want her to feel rejected, but I will say have the conversation. And then ask her, and come from a place of being curious of why, you know, I noticed that, you know, your libido is on a whole nother level. Where did that— where does that come from? Have the conversations, you know, with her, um, about it. And because honestly, it sounds like she's just in a different phase of life than you. And either you can take the heat or you can't. I'm just saying, it's what it is. So either you're going to get someone that her sex drive is not on 10, because that's not going away. As a 49-year-old woman, I'm telling you, that's not going away. So you have to make a decision. You have to make a decision. Or, you know, I put it like this: it's very interesting because as women, we're told that we constantly withhold. Now you got a woman that don't withhold and you don't know what to do with it. Fellas, y'all got to make up your mind on a lot of things. A lot of things you say you want, and when you get it, you don't know how to handle it. So it's just very interesting, uh, it's very interesting to me, you know, when I hear, you know, oops, I'm going the wrong way. When I hear men have these, um, these conversations about a woman and her sex drive, but yet y'all say, I want it, I want a woman that want to give it to me on a regular. Well, she giving it to you, what you gonna do with it? Okay, I'm just saying, have the conversation with her and figure out if this is— this is the ideal situation for you. Because what I'm not going to do is suppress her sexual appetite. We've been done that way for centuries. So I'm not going to tell you to have a conversation with her to get her to change. No, I'm not going to do that. But what I am going to do is ask you if this is something that you can handle. Because if I say, well, you know what, ask her, can she cut back a little? I'm not going to do that. She's in her super sexy, sensual era. So she needs to be able to express that, whether it's with you or she finds somebody else that can. I mean— 'Cause remember, you guys say, well, y'all want it when you want it, whether we're laying down asleep, whether it's first thing in the morning, you guys want what you want when you want it. 'Cause we all, as women, we hear you guys talk about it on a regular basis. She don't wanna give me none, I tap her on the shoulder, she don't wanna give me, or I wanted what I wanted. Well, the roles has reversed. And you should have asked somebody before you start dealing with a saber-tooth. She's not a cougar, she's a saber-tooth. So you— if you— for all of the young men under the sound of my voice, if you're dealing with a woman 45 and over, I would say especially between 45 and 55, understand what you're getting yourself into. So either you're going to have to decide if you're going to be a boy toy or if you're trying to be in a relationship with her and still be a boy toy. So you have to decide which one you're going to be. But I will never tell a woman to suppress her sexual appetite because no one would ever tell a man to suppress his sexual appetite, especially when she's 45 and over. So, um, it was that Ethan. You just gonna have to figure out, baby, if you can handle it, okay? Because she's 10 years your senior, okay? Hey, Jeremy says both. Both what, Jeremy? What is both? Okay, so now this one I found very, very interesting, um, and it's a— a gentleman had a question about the 4B movement. Are you guys familiar with the 4B movement? If you're familiar with the 4B movement, let me know in the comment section. If you're familiar with the 4B movement— oh, Jeremy said both, settle down with her and be her boy toy. There it is. But can you handle it? Some of y'all can't handle it because you're not eating right, you got erectile dysfunction, you're eating a lot of chicken, you're eating a lot of non-healthy foods. And what we're seeing is more and more younger men are dealing with ED due to poor health choices. Okay, or they can— is it after dark? Can I say it? Or they've been entertaining and pleasuring themselves so much that they don't have any type of stamina anymore. We're seeing that as well too. Okay, so this one is, um, this one was interesting about the 4B. He says I've been watching this new movement, the 4B thing, taking shape across the country, and to be honest, Miss April, it's, it's got me feeling some type of way. I've always loved women, appreciated them, respected them, and I genuinely want to build something real with someone one day. But lately, it seems like a lot of women are distancing themselves from the idea of even wanting men around. 'And April, I get it. I understand the reasons behind it. There, um, there's been a lot of hurt and betrayal, and I know how us men can be and how we have lived our lives and what we get from women. Some of us deserve. But seeing so many women talk about moving away from men altogether, it's honestly got me worried. I'm not the type who wants to be in a power struggle or control anyone. I want partnership, respect, and real love. But I'm starting to wonder, do women even want that anymore?' Are they done with us? I know a lot of men could learn to show more support, communicate. I know we get talk— told to communicate better and be more vulnerable. I'm willing to put in the work to be the type of man a woman can rely on and trust, but I don't know if it's enough right now. I'm truly concerned. Do you think there's still hope for men and women to connect and find lasting love? Oh, for those of you that's saying you don't know what the 4B movement is, the 4B movement is all about decentering men. It started, I believe, overseas in Asia somewhere where women were saying no to sex, no to having children, no to dating men, no to engaging with men, or something like that. I'm paraphrasing, so go look it up. It's called the 4B movement. Um, so this is what I will say. To you, sir. Um, in Western culture, you don't have to worry about the 4B movement, although it's trending on TikTok, it's trending on YouTube and the other social media platforms. And the reason why I say I don't believe this 4B movement from Western women is because when you're done with something, you don't talk about it. Hello, somebody. When you're done with something, you don't talk about it. All you see on TikTok anytime I log on is about a woman talking about leaving men alone, um, What do you call it? Trad wives. What's the other one? What's the other one? Hospice wives. Like, if you're really done with men, you don't talk about them at all. But the moment you log on TikTok, YouTube, Instagram, whatever, you hear women discussing what? Men. So I don't think he didn't put a name. But I don't think that you, as a— if you're in the United States of America, that you don't— you have to worry about that. Women cannot stop talking about men. So I don't see it happening. This is what I do believe is happening. I believe that women are using this 4B movement to withdraw and more punish men. But if they had better— a better option, they would be all in. That's why I don't think it's real. See, I believe in Western culture, women are fed up with the, the options that they've had. So it's like, I'm going to join the 4B movement, not for myself to decenter men, because my thing is decentering men means even if there is a barrage of quality men, you're still not really engaging. If you're saying, I'm not, I'm not engaging at all, it doesn't matter if he's a good one or a bad one. You're just not engaging. But I believe that if women had the choices that they want and men showed up in a way that they felt like men should show up, none of this would even be an issue. It wouldn't even be an issue. I just don't believe it. It's easy to say what you won't do or what you're going to do until what you want shows up. And so anytime I was coaching women, I would ask when they say they were done with men, I said, are you done with men? But if some— if the right one came along and he approached you right and everything was in line, would you deal with him? Oh, well, yeah. Then you're not done with men. Anybody that cannot stop talking about what it is that they say they don't want, they still want it. So the— to the gentlemen here, I don't think you have anything to worry about with Western women because every time you open up the app, it's some woman having a conversation about men and telling other women to leave men alone when all you got to do is just shut up and just leave men alone. I'm just saying, that's all you gotta do. You don't have to get on the internet. You don't have to— you don't have to try to get a tribe of other women with the same energy to back you up. You just say, if I don't fool with them, I don't fool with them. So somebody said, but a lot of the men they want don't want them because wealthy men are out of a lot of these Black women's leagues, so they need to stay in their place. First of all, sir, there is no place. And secondly, most Black men aren't wealthy. I don't know where y'all get that shit from, but the average Black man in America doesn't even make $63,000 a year. So what you mean when you say stay in your place, that means y'all need to stay in your place because most of you have no money and you're the lowest on the societal hierarchy and you always talking ish. So at the end of the day, at— okay, and can I say, can I tell them what I told the man in Miami? This was a break segue into that. Can I tell them what I told the man in Miami? So I was in Miami at the Black Men Excel Conference last week. And because this guy said— I'm reading his comment. He said, Groupons feel entitled. Um, it sounds like a Black guy, but I'm going to read what he says about standing your place. He says, but a lot of the men they want don't want them because wealthy men are out of a lot of these Black women's leagues, so they need to stay in their place. I see it all the time with athletes. These groupons feel entitled because of a lot of them marry foreign women. Okay, let me say this because this is what happened when I was in Miami. All right, let me, let me, let me, let me have to tell you what I had, sir, what I had to tell a man that came to sit by me when I was in Miami. So I was at the Black Men Excel Conference last, uh, this past week in Miami for 2 days. And this guy, I was sitting there at the, at the pool getting my work done, and I saw him look at me, and my son-in-law saw him too. My son was like, like, Ma, he about to break his neck. So my son-in-law said, excuse me, sir, you want to come sit with my mother-in-law? And he said, I gotta run back. But he came in, introduced himself, and then he came back and shook my hand. So I was still getting some work done. About an hour later, he comes back. He said, I hope I didn't keep you too long. I said, I've been here, you know. And we get to talking. And this comment that I'm— what I'm getting ready to say is, is specifically for— I don't know, what was the username? Uh, the username was Sincere Sharif. This is for you, baby. Um, we were having a conversation about the male-female dynamic and all of these things, and he started talking about that Black man stuff, right? I'm like, oh, here we go with that. But I listened, and he was talking about women and submissiveness and all of that. So Sharif, this is for you. This is exactly what I told him. I said, can— and I all— before I go in, I always say, can I say this without you getting offended? And he seemed like a brother that, you know, he was mature. And he said, yeah, because we were having grown folks conversation. And I said, can I tell you something without you getting offended? He said, yes. I said, I heard everything that you said about what women are and Black women and that, all that, that, right? I said, but I think that— I don't think there's one thing that I don't think you as a Black man understand that me as a Black woman understand. He said, what's that? I said, I'm very aware that you as a Black man have no power in this country. I'm very aware that you as a Black man can't change a law, can't change the socioeconomic status, cannot do anything power in this world, which is why you need to have submission in your household, because that's the only place that you have power. You are the lowest on the totem pole when it comes to societal hierarchy. But at the same time, everything you just sat here and told me about Black women— Black women still chose you knowing you have no power in this country, knowing that you control no industry at all. But Black women still chose to call you king. I'm very aware of that. I said, are you? I said, because I know there's a lot of men here that make a lot of money and, you know, you walk around with your chest out. But me as a Black woman know you have no power to do anything in this country other than rally, protest, And that's it. Which is why it's very important for you to have some type of control in your home.

Why?

Why she got to be submissive? I said, nobody else talk about submission but you guys because you have no power. And I'm aware of that. He said, are you laughing? Are you laughing at— So he sat back in his seat and he sat back and he said, wow. I didn't think about it like that. I said, yeah, a lot of you walk around here like you're the shit, but you have no power. What industry do you control? You can't say sports because you play sports. They put you on the block like a slave in sports. Let me see what, you know, what's his size? Let me see how fast he run. Didn't you guys hear the owner of the Texans? He said, oh, he got an 8-inch dick. Did you guys not see that? What, Jamie Foxx? You don't run that, right? If they're making billions of dollars off the sport and they only giving you $100 million, how much you think they making off you, Mr. No Power? Music industry. Even Jay-Z has to sit with the Jews to get what he needs to get done. So as I said, Black man who just told us to stay in our place, we are very aware that you have no power, no ownership, no nothing. And you still talk about being a top-tier man, but yet the average Black man in America doesn't even make $63,000 a year. Only 21% of men in America, across race doesn't matter, only makes $100,000— only 21% makes $100,000 a year, love. And out of that 21%, only 8% of them are Black men. So while you guys are in your head thinking you're top tier and your ego is inflated, where is your power? What industry do you run? It's not tech. It's not the medical, you know, healthcare. It's not oil and gas. It's not anything that we need as a necessity that you actually run. You participate in entertainment. Sports is entertainment. Being an actor, being a singer, being a rapper, that's entertainment. But what power do you have? Other than systematic racism. Get that bullshit out of here. We don't do that no more. Because as women, we are still moving forward regardless of the struggles that we had to deal with. So you can't use that. So me as a Black woman, Mr. Sincere Sharif, know that all you just said and calling us groupons and entitled, that your ass ain't got no power Whatsoever. Okay. Toodles. Hmm. But we still choose you knowing that you have no power. Even in slavery, you couldn't even stop the slave master from raping us. So you didn't have no power then. And in 2024, you have no power now. So before you start talking about what we are, understand you have no power. Name an industry that Black men run and don't have to answer to anybody or run anything by anybody that doesn't look like them. I'll wait. Hello, somebody. I'm just waiting. Where are you, Mr. Sharif? Where are you? Since this is about men, what are we submitting to? You have no power. So humble yourself, because we still choose you knowing you have no power. Mark said be nice. No, there's no be nice. This is grown people talk. What do you— why do we have to be nice when we're having grown people conversation, Mark? Or is it— is it hard for you to hear that as a black man you have no power? And but we still choose you knowing this. I just want you— I just want something I want you to think about before you start telling us Black women what we're not and you have no power. That's all. This is a grown folks conversation. There is nothing about being nice. We're getting tired of hearing what we're not all the time. You're telling us what we're not. We're still walking around knowing you have no power. To do anything in this country. Fellas, you're in the comment section. What do you have power over? Why are you telling me to be nice? Am I being mean or am I having conversation? And we still chose you knowing this. Why are you talking all of this shit about what we're not and we need to submit and we don't this and we don't that? Go get some power. Power sexy. We're just having grown people conversation at 9:33 PM Eastern Standard Time. Welcome to the Feminine Ear, where men are seen, heard, and understood. Sir, you, you were definitely seen in that moment. Okay, Carlton said, I got power over the P. Yeah, that's weak shit too. Weak ass. If that's all you can say, I mean, come on, you got power, but that don't change nothing. Where your power at? The only true power is our choice, integrity, and service to our family. That's that shit. That's what I'm talking about. You can't do anything in society. It's all in your household. You can't— that's what I'm saying. Everybody else can get other things done, but my point in saying this is not to dog you out or not to belittle you or emasculate you. My point in pointing this out is that we constantly hear as Black women what we are not, but we're still choosing a group of men that have no power. That's, that's my point. And I don't think you guys— some of you, like the gentleman that made that comment, don't understand that. We're very aware you can't even really protect us. Couldn't even protect us in slavery, so we can't even protect us now. Well, I'm protecting and providing. Well, okay, if I have to go to work for 12 and I'm out of the house for 12 hours a day, how are you protecting me those 12 hours? So you got to come up with something better than that. So my goal is for you to understand why you have this ego of, I'm a high-value, high man, but you control nothing. I want you to think about where this ego and chip on your shoulder is coming from when you can't get a law changed, where you cannot control any type of— you, you have no kingdoms. Everybody want to be a king with no kingdom. You're not protecting women and children because all of this foolishness is going on. A king has a kingdom, right? A king knows how to negotiate amongst, uh, you know, other, other, um, other kingdoms and other, uh, what do you call it, countries. And they know how to sit down and have these negotiations. Who, who are you talking to? She said protection is more than just physical. Go get some money and start and stop that. Protection is more than just physical. Oh, so you protected me mentally? Okay, come on, y'all. Y'all keep coming with weak stuff. We understand that protection is not just physical, but that's what y'all use. Y'all use that. I'm protecting you. I'm here for— to protect and provide. Well, if the average black man is making— not even making $65,000 a year, and I'm out of that, but you want 50/50, and I'm out of the house almost 12 hours a day and you scream protection. What is it, bro? This is me just trying to get you to think about what you're saying instead of, instead of getting offended. Look at, am I the man that she's talking about? And what do I need to do as a man to rise up and be the king that we call you knowing you don't have no power? Like, what does that look like? Okay, what does that look like? Where is your power? Don't give me philosophical things and things that I can't touch. It's in the mind, and my power is within Jesus. Give me something else. We gonna pray it away, we're gonna tarry it away and wait on God. So help me, you've reached the feminine area where men are seen, heard, and understood. Fellas, if you would like to come on and you have a question, make sure you click the, uh, Click the website and go to the red button, and you can come on live with me, and we can, we can chit-chat. But I had to pause right there because that was a perfect segue into the conversation that I just had in Florida, because I had to explain to this man that, um, you have no power. Why are you telling me what we not and what you want? Where's your power? I think y'all just the only ones don't realize that we know. We just don't throw it in your face. Okay, that's, that's it. We know, understand, we know as women that you have no power, and when it comes to societal hierarchy, you're the lowest on the totem pole. We know that, but we don't throw it in your face. We still choose you anyway, knowing that's why you need submission. We know that because that's the only thing you can try to control. Okay, so that's all I have. Let me fix it. Let me fix my, my shirt. I'm finished now. I got a little warm in here. Okay. Oh my goodness, it gets, it gets warm. It's gotten warm, um, in here. Okay. Uh-oh. Your definition of power is weak too. Power is getting up every day. My— oh, my definition of power is weak? Power is getting up every day, up every day, and working hard to take care and be there for his family regardless of the career. We— my definition is weak, or you're weak? Power is a person that can change things. See, you can only understand under the context of what you have access to. Because you have no real power in the world, you can only relegate your power to getting up every day and taking care of your family. I'm not talking about just your family. I'm talking about changing the dynamics in the world. I'm talking about controlling industries is what I'm talking about. I'm talking about having negotiations with, you know, other countries and being able to, to, to really make effective effective change. You can only— you're right. If my, if my definition of power is weak, it's only because I'm talking over your head and all you can do is— you can't even phantom, phantom having power that where you could actually make changes. Okay, so the only power that you have is in your house. So you're right, you're right, because you can't even think of having power anywhere else, because you— it's like you've already— you already know you won't. Yeah, exactly. Diddy didn't have power. R. Kelly, Bill Cosby, none of them— they don't have any power. They have money, but they don't have power. See the difference? They don't have money. I mean, they have money, but they have no power. That's what I'm talking about. So before you come telling us what we're not, go get some power, bruh. I want you to think, because a lot of you are living in this delusion like you're bringing something that you're really not, okay? Why is it that Black women own more homes than you guys? Single Black women do. Why? Where's your power, apartment? Like, what are we doing here? This is just to get you to think. This is not a real dig, because I'm aware— I've been aware that you had no power for a long time, but I still dated you, okay? I've been aware— I've been aware of this for a very long time. It's you guys that don't realize that. Oh, I like that. Someone said there are a lot of powerless, financially stable, uh, comfortable men or something like that. He says— wait, where did it go? Hold on, I'm looking for the comment. Wait, I think I passed it by accident. Uh, in my opinion, you're speaking about issues that we were born into as Black men in this society. Power structures are created through war and murder. Weak ass. Y'all will forever come up with excuses instead of a problem— a solution. We were born into this. Yeah, I was born a woman and with a vagina, right? I was born as a female, seen as second class. Matter of fact, even though the way people voted showed us that women don't— women's rights and how we are, who we are, don't mean nothing. Even in religion, we show we are seen as secondary. So don't give me none of this, we were born in this. I'm born into this as a woman. And women that came before me was traded like property. A Black woman couldn't even vote until 1965. A white woman couldn't even vote until 1920. And you want to complain about something you were born into? But yet we were able to shift the dynamics. Weak ass. I don't want to hear that. I want to hear that. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear it. I do not want to hear that because I was born a woman. Okay, black women on average is, is not even making $50,000 a year. I have friends who work at a car dealership and black women coming in with credit scores in the 500s. Okay, Sincere Sharif, and you still have no power. She can get her credit score up, but you'll never be able to change a law. She can get her credit score up and make more money. But you will still be seen as lowest on the totem pole. That's what I'm saying. Get out of your feelings and look at the fact that you're on the bottom while you're talking about a woman's credit score, when all she has to do is learn financial literacy and turn around her, her finances and change her credit. But you, as a Black man in America, will still be the lowest on the totem pole and have no power. That's why you don't have a seat at the freaking table. Uh, she said these are light bulb moments. Yeah, this is what a light bulb moment is. This is not to emasculate you. This is to get you to really pop your bubble of this ego thing, ego trip that you have going on, talking about I am a, um, a six-figure man and these women, these women, these women, but yet you have no money, no money, no money. Shoot, if she want to get some credit, all she got to do is start a business. Get her tax ID number, incorporate, and do all of the things, and she can get some credit and go get— buy her car on her business. But in this world, you still will have no power. Even when her credit is at 800 credit score, you still won't have no power. Um, change a law so a Black man who put in Congress couldn't change the law. He didn't do that. He could— he could— when I say power, I'm talking about not having to go to anybody. That Black man still had to ask somebody that don't look like him to vote on that. That's what I'm talking about. What industry do you have that you don't have to talk to anybody that don't look like you and you can make change? Go ahead, I'll wait while I get my next question together. Yeah, this is about having an open mind. You can't come in here and take shots at Black women, and I'm a Black woman, and you expect me not to read you your rights and understand that I understand that you have no power, that I can't just go to you and say Hey, can you go make that happen on a large scale for the collective? I'm very aware of that. It's caused you to think, to say, hmm, maybe I need to figure out what I need to dominate outside of sports, because sports, you're still owned. If you're on a record label, you're still owned. Okay, so I guess Malcolm X and Dr. King didn't have power. Nelson Mandela— no, they didn't have no power. Right before Martin Luther King died, before he was assassinated, he said he led us down the wrong path. Once he started talking about economics and money, they assassinated his ass. So no, they did not have any power like you— the power that I'm talking about. So no, they were able to give calls, uh, do, do stand-ins and rallies and all of that. They have power amongst their group, but the very reason why Malcolm X was assassinated is because he started talking about financial freedom and economics, the things that y'all ain't running. That's the whole point why they were killed. Once they start asking for money, that's when they're assassinated. Hell, I got more power than you. Wanna know why? Even though y'all say as women we're second-class citizens and, and we're seen as property, I got more power than you, black man. Wanna know why? Because I have a vagina. I have titties. I can get indoors you'll never be able to, even if I'm seen as secondary. Okay, if you look throughout history, who was sent in to infiltrate these powerful men, it always was a woman. Okay, so instead of going back and forth Ask yourself, what, what do I need to expand my definition of what power actually looks like? That's, that's my whole point of having this conversation. Expand your definition outside of your household and don't feel like you are defeated. What industry can you control and dominate? Because it's not tech, it's not the health industry, it's not the food, uh, what is it, uh, food, gas, and oil. It's not that. So what industry can you dominate that you don't have to answer to nobody? That's power. It doesn't matter who is at the top when you're a woman. And you have a vagina. Kingdoms have come down behind a vagina, okay? So why y'all— but, but we this, but we that, that, and that's why we— some of us don't like y'all, because you don't listen to understand, you listen to make excuses. Nobody's putting Black men and Black women against each other, ma'am. This is having dialogue and having a hard conversation. They already against each other. The man came in here talking mess. You can't name a woman, um, Black woman on Michael Jordan's level. Yeah, Oprah, dumbass. Sounds like you need a hug. So this is not putting anybody against each other, it's having the conversation. We're no longer, we're no longer tippy-toeing around what is. You can't come on here and be disrespectful and tell me what Black women aren't and not have me remind you that you have no power. I'm not going to do it. And I'm not going to sit here and let's kumbaya. No, everybody is— just all kinfolk ain't skinfolk. All kinfolk— skinfolk ain't kinfolk. So at the end of the day, that was the conversation that I had with the man. Let's move on to the next question. But this was good. Was this good, fellas? This is good dialogue. Let's move on to the next question. Um, it's not tech, agricultural, medical, education, oil again. Yeah, we got to figure out which one it's going to be. You gotta— we gotta figure out which one is gonna be. So once again, this whole dialogue was all about you looking at the ego that a lot of you Black men have on your shoulder about— in this whole high value, uh, conversation that you're having when you really have no power in the world. That's the conversation that this is about. Okay, so it's certain egos that's going on, but you control nothing. Like, literally nothing. You know how to dance and you know how to dribble a ball, you know how to rap a little bit, you know, a little still R&B. But what do you control? Because all of those industries, you're under contract and they own you. So that's what I want you to look at. Go beyond, go beyond this basic stuff. That's all I'm saying. Go beyond, you know, needing somebody to be submissive because that's the only power that you feel like you will have. Create financial wealth, generational wealth, create power structures. Okay, that's all this was about. Anywho, let's moving right along. Are you laughing at— oh, I thought you were laughing again. Oh, okay, let's talk about Marcus. Marcus is 58. He said Listen, I've been happily married for years, but recently I reconnected with an old high school flame on social media. Lord have mercy. Oh, but you guys both said mm at the same time. At first it was just friendly catching up, but now I can't stop thinking about her. She's single. Okay, she's single and it's stirring up feelings. I thought, I thought we're long— that were long gone. I don't want to jeopardize my marriage, but I can't ignore the excitement I feel. Am I just chasing a fantasy or is this something worth exploring? But Marcus, Marcus, is this on? Marcus, you're 58, first of all, and you're getting ready to risk it all at 58 for feeling. And what's happening is See, she's giving— she's reminding you of your youth, okay? She's reminding you and she making you feel like the man. Because you got to remember, she's probably clocked how you take care of your wife, Marcus. She probably sees the type of man that you are, Marcus. She's single, Marcus. You shouldn't even be engaging with her, Marcus. Let me ask you this, Marcus. If your wife connected with her old high school— why are you laughing at— if your wife connected with— who is this woman again? Can we connect with her old high school flame? Let's say his name was Keith. And he was the head of the football team, and he had muscles and everything like that. And then he went to college and he played quarterback for— what's called— Penn State. He played quarterback, right? And he went on to become a very successful man, and he's still handsome at 58. And all of a sudden, you know, he ended up getting a divorce because he married the cheerleader, and they end up getting a divorce. And all of a sudden, he reconnects with your wife on social media, right? And he's telling her how beautiful she looks, and he's reminding her of the sweet nothings and the little letters and all of the things that they did in high school. Would that be okay, Marcus? You're 58, getting ready to mess it up. So Marcus, block the girl. It made you feel good for a minute that you were still desired. And keep it moving. Because guess what? Don't you guys say it's cheaper to keep her? Then you'll be mad if she take half, because y'all know you don't like when they take half, but you put her in a position to do so. Okay, so yeah, don't, don't, don't— just, just— it's a fantasy. Yeah, it's a fantasy, baby. Let it, let it, let it play out. Enjoy the feeling for this moment. And keep moving. Okay, because I know men who— matter of fact, I had a man tell me recently, um, he's in a relationship but his woman can't even look at porn with another man's penis in it. How do you do that? I don't know. So yeah, so some men, they don't even allow any of the thought of somebody else. So are you okay with that? Ooh, Marcus, what about her going to the class reunion and she don't go with you? And she runs into Keith. What if she did that? You know, just so happen, you know, you hurt your leg and you can't go, your back went out. And she went to the class reunion, and she's been engaging with Keith behind your back. What would you say? Would it be okay? Hmm. I'm just asking. I'm just asking. Um, someone says Mark is looking for a reason to leave. Well, he said he's been and a happy— happily married. I've— he said, I've been happily married for years. So what you're saying is— now let's circle back around to this. What you're saying is, and this is my— this has always been my belief, that a man doesn't have to be unhappy to cheat. He clearly said, I've been happily married for years. He just has the opportunity because he said He's happily married. And I've— I never felt like a man has to be miserable to cheat. You just have to have lack penis discipline and have an opportunity, because he clearly said that he was happy. Okay, um, where's— let me— there's another one I wanted to read. I wanted— I went through it, but I think this was a good one to, to discuss. It was right here. Are y'all, are y'all in here? I see you in here. Like, how many people we have? Really nice. There's one I wanted to read because I want to make sure that y'all know you can't waste— you can't waste people's time. You guys loving it? Let me know. Give me, give me some high fives in the chat if you're enjoying tonight's Feminine Ear, where men are seen, heard, and understood. Okay. Where's the— it's one. Did I print it out over there? I think it's— I may not have. I may not have. Okay, good. So I'll just keep it moving, keep it moving. Um, if I can't find it, I'll address the situation, um, because I know I've met— I ran into several people that are having this, this issue, um, but I want to make sure. I would like to read it, but I may have made a mistake in not taking it off the printer. Okay, good, we got a bunch of— have Policewoman April. April is out. Well, you know, you can't come in and tell me as a Black woman what I'm not and then think that I'm not going to remind you of what I know, that what I'm aware of. You know, she don't, she don't carry it all the time, but every now and again you gotta, you know, fix folks. Oh, let's see who we got here.

Hello.

Oh, well, hello there, darling. How are you?

I'm good. What about you?

Are you in a tent?

I see, uh, no, I got a canopy. I'm in bed. I got black curtains and yeah, because I'm about to— I'm about to go to sleep right after I get off of here.

Okay.

You got, you got— oh, you cutting them, you cutting them today.

Well, you know, I had to have the conversation.

You know what, it's necessary because you got a lot of— you do have a lot of guys out there who like to get in their ego, and, uh, a lot of y'all females are like that. Uh, they make too much damn noise.

Well, I said that, but that's not alpha male though.

I said a lot of them act like that.

Oh, gotcha, gotcha.

And they do need to be cut. So, hey, cut them.

Yeah, it's just, you know, it's a healthy conversation to have because I think sometimes people live in delusional world and their ego is so, you know, just inflated that they think there's something, but they don't. They're not looking at the full scope of, wait a minute, I only can control this. There's nothing else that I can do to control anything. Like, and it's sad to say that there's no power. You know, it sounds harsh when you hear somebody tell you, you have no power to do anything.

Right.

You know?

But what you said, it is— you say that we have no power, but at the same time, you're choosing us. That was the underlying message, that you're choosing us regardless of whether we have the power or not. You got her back.

Yes. And that's what we want in return. Because what we're not going to do is keep hearing what we're not and having the daggers thrown without you guys realizing you throwing daggers. But understand, I do know that you have no power and we just call you king even though you have no kingdom. Understand that we know that. But I don't think anybody is having that particular conversation because we want to— let's all kumbaya, let's all get along, let's all just make everybody feel warm and fuzzy. At the end of the day, nobody has a hard time— I mean, has an issue making us feel uncomfortable or telling us what we're not. And then all of a sudden, you know, we're just going along thinking that what's being said is who we are, not realizing it. Wait a minute. Because when I was explaining that to the gentleman in Florida, he had to sit back. And I'm like, he said, like, wait a minute, wait, what did you just say? I said, you don't have no power.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, you had to get off his high horse. Yeah.

Yeah, you know, so it's, it's, it's, it's an interesting dynamic. Um, somebody, he says, and Black women have no power besides throwing that pussy around like prostitutes. At least we getting paid. You go break— you go get your net worth up, young man. You're still at the bottom of the bed. At least she's smart enough to sell it, if that— if you call her a prostitute, at least she's smart enough to sell it. Your net worth, and you even with that You still have no power.

Yeah, I love the way you think. I swear.

I mean, she's— you still have no power. You could call us whatever you want to do, you're still going to be a powerless Black man in America. I mean, so at least she getting paid for something, building her net worth and buying another house that most of you don't own.

Right. We got to get away from that brainwashing, uh, making us think that we can't, uh, come together on an idea. I was talking to some co-workers saying it's easier for me to— I was telling them about a multi-trillion dollar industry that you don't hear about.

Okay.

And how it'd be easier for me to get 100 people together to commit a crime than to get 10 people together to do something right. That, you know, we can make money off of. I was pointing it out. I was showing them where this right here, this, this, this, and this. And it's underground. You don't hear about it. Yeah, but it's right there in front of everybody. But no, you can't convince folks to do it. So, yeah, that's, that's a problem with our power that we don't.

Yeah. So that's why I don't even like this is, this is fun for me. But these are things that I've learned years ago when I was younger. You know, I learned this, you know. And looking back, it's like, I understand why women are pulling away. Um, and because I said before that this is the perfect time, the first time in history that men are asked to be more than just a wallet and provision because we have our own. And I believe what's happening is we have a lot of men struggling with figuring out who I am and what I have to offer outside of a paycheck and outside of, um, a paycheck and provision. So it's like, like having tantrums like little kids and just throwing daggers. And it's like, well, all you got to do is self-develop. But men aren't really taught to deal with their emotions. So we're saying now, okay, we've had women fight for our rights for a long time, you know, and, and we're still, and we're still lagging behind.

Yeah.

Okay, um, if you are on Instagram, for some reason Instagram will not show the full screen. You would have to go to YouTube or Facebook. Um, but even watching this election, there, there should have never been even a thought of putting women's rights, being a human being, up against Economics and deportation. That goes back to what I was speaking about, us women not seen as human beings with our own autonomy, and that we were really placed here, we're taught that we're placed here to be a man's pleasure, to bear children, or to be domesticated workers. Like, you really believe, a lot of men really believe that's our purpose on this planet. Yet if that were the case, why aren't more men more successful if that's all we're supposed to do, right? And I just don't— I, I just don't understand. That's why I always teach that when, you know, when I teach women that femininity is not— is, is gifted to a man. Femininity has nothing to do with a man. Femininity is your divine right to have. Your femininity, spirituality, sensuality or wisdom, okay? That's for you, and then you gift it to the man that you choose. But, but the patriarchy has us in such of a chokehold that a woman's rights— and I was listening to, uh, and I posted on my Facebook page in Wisconsin, you know, the judge, she was, she was asking the guy, so what you're saying is if a young girl is raped by her father, she cannot have an abortion? And he said no. Like every— and she's going down the list. But the fact, the fact that this is even a freaking discussion, yeah, it's triggering to me that when people were looking at the vote, they was like, well, people voted based on what was important to them, which was, you know, economics, deportation, all the other things. I'm like, so we're not important?

You know what though, every, every group he Every group was insulted. Muslims, women, foreigners, everybody who's different, people who didn't have money because, you know, taxes are gonna— the rich are gonna have their taxes cut. Every group had a reason to vote different, and they didn't, and it broke my heart. But we're gonna have to deal with it. We have to get through because it will— if anybody can get through it, it's us.

Because yeah, but that's what I'm saying, we don't want to. That's why as women we're saying screw it, we're not trying to. We put everything down, do it yourselves, whatever. We're not, we're not trying to get through anything. Like, I think people are not going to see something huge, a huge shift in 2025. Women are completely pulling back. We're not trying to get through it, we're not trying to kumbaya it, we're not trying to protest it, we're not trying to do any of that. What we're saying is leave us there. not that important. And if you are trying to once again control our, our rights as women, as autonomous human beings— men are trying to control, just like every religion. There's no religion, mainstream religion, that was written by a woman, but all of them that are written by men tell women what to do. Our government does the same thing. So we're not fighting for anything. We're not picking up, picking up our bags, drying our tears, and pressing on. We're saying eff it. Because they keep showing us. And what, what's going to happen is men are really going to feel the pullback. That's why I wrote my new book, Her Invisible Value, because the world and men get to feel and experience a woman's invisible value, right? But they don't, they don't know, they don't count it. It's like it's not seen as something that's tangible. So I told my ladies in my private group, oh yeah, we We're not doing this, okay? Well, somebody said you're not hurting anyone. No one cares that women aren't doing anything. You've, you've never been worthy of your votes. Y'all are sexist and it's, you know, aren't doing anything. You've never been worthy of our votes. Y'all are sexist and it shows. Okay, I don't understand, but okay.

That right there is— don't even worry about it. Um, you can actually say you're joining African men because we pulled back too. We pulled back a while ago. A lot of them.

Here's the thing, here's the thing though. We don't, we don't see that. I think what it is is with us women, all of the women that took a woman's life as something of importance, we don't care if it's any man that's pulling back. We don't care about none of it. Like, I think what's happened is we've gotten so fed up that— I think it was Muhammad Ali that said, if you have 10,000 snakes and there's 1,000 snakes that's good, you're not gonna open the door. So we don't like that. And I think this is the part that men don't understand. It doesn't matter if he's a Black man, a white man, an Asian man, a Latino man, and he's all lumped in there. We don't care. Like, it's not— and when I say we don't care, what we're saying is don't ask us for nothing. We're not picking up nothing. Don't— if there's an injustice, we're not on the front lines. We're not pro— we're not doing anything. Because for someone to simply say, hey, I care enough about women as a human being over money. That's what I'm saying. People voted over, over a woman for money. And what we're saying is, since we're not valued more than that, Bet. Well, that's not true. That's what it is. You—

it was 71% of us that thought otherwise.

Now, okay, it was— and I— it was 78%, but let me— let me— you, you're absolutely correct, but can I say it how I feel it?

Yeah, because I know it hurts.

Y'all owed us that. This is what I mean. That's 78% of votes versus what we get on a day-to-day, it doesn't change anything. You at least owe us that. But that doesn't translate to lifestyle and how the men are showing up on a day-to-day. So yes, you get credit for voting for, for, for women and us being human beings, but at the same time, that's the least you can do considering in the day-to-day life how many of you are engaging and connecting like that. Even when you've come on before, you said— you yourself said, I, I don't know if I want to be married, I don't know if I want to do— it's like everybody's pulling away, but it's easy to push, it's easy to get on and vote and push a button than it actually is to actually engage and let your lifestyle and your movements and your efforts and your patterns and your consistency and your actions line up with your words. It's easier to get in a booth for about 5 minutes, 5, 10 minutes, and push buttons to say I did something, which is not taken lightly that you did. But now that it didn't translate over to anything else, what does that look like day to day? That's what I want to see. What does that look like? Because we get a lot of brothers that now say, oh yeah, well, it was 70%. We did, we did, we did. I get it. What now that we see where it's at, what does that look like in the day-to-day? That's what I want to know. What, what would you suggest that looks like now? How, how do you connect now? If, if, if the men that voted had no problem with women, women's leadership, and was— they were voting based upon women's rights and all of these other things, how does that translate into your day-to-day actions?

We definitely got to talk to each other and, and correct, correct some of that, that nonsense that, that spills out of people's faces, um, when they start chopping at women unnecessarily, especially African women. It's like, why, why of all the people that could be cut down, we are the ones that are cut down the most? And why would we have to cut each other down? Out even more.

So what are y'all gonna do?

So correct that. Correct.

So what, so what are y'all— what my point is, what if we're saying as women we're done, what are the men going to rise up and do? Because that's what we've been waiting for for a very long time. On one end, the men will tell us that we need to be submissive and, and a woman needs to stay in her place, but on the other end, things are falling. So what— and they want to lead. What does that look like? How, how does this come together?

I talked to him blue in the face, and I got a problem with arguing with fools.

Um, we don't want you to do that.

It's too— that's a curse. Um, when I spent a lot of time talking about how she had to be flawless when he was lawless, um, it's just over and over again trying to correct the nonsense that's out there. I can't, uh, I can't change the world, but I can try to pass on what I know and, and what I see with the reality.

Do you remember the show? Do you remember the movie John Q? Have you seen that?

Yeah, I have.

See, I, I— what I, what I think, what, what men aren't getting, um, is there was a, there was a part in that movie when Elise Neal— not Elise Neal, but, um, what was her name? It's not Elise Neal, it's, uh, Ellis. Oh goodness, I forgot her name, but you guys know who I'm talking about. When she told Denzel, do something. That's what she said. Do something. We're tired of conversations. Yes, we're tired of, of the powwows. Kimberly Elise, thank you so much. We're tired of the powwows. We're tired of the town hall meetings. We're tired of the panels. This is why I don't do panels. I get invited to do all kind of panels all the time, and I typically say no unless it's somebody that, um, I'm friends with or somebody that I like, because I'm tired of talking. So what else do we— what else? We don't want to talk— what does it look like? There was only one man that I can remember in my lifetime that came up with a manifesto of what to do, and the Black community dogged him out. And that was Ice Cube in 2020.

Okay.

Yeah, if you guys don't look up Ice Cube's manifesto—

huh, I was about to say something similar. It still comes down to getting money, getting, uh, getting, getting something that makes people pay attention to you, and Well, I don't even think it's that because Ice Cube has all that and they still didn't pay attention.

I mean, if you read— if you go and read his manifesto, there's money, huh?

A lot of the— there's money and there's money. A lot of the athletes have money, but the people who sign their paychecks have money. You— when you get to that level, when you get enough people together, and a lot of these people with wealth if they brought their wealth together, they would be listened to.

Yeah, but why do you gotta be listened to? Why can't you just get your money and go do it? Who, who? But I guess that's my question. Who are you trying to get to listen?

Well, the lawmakers in the country that you live in. For one.

Okay. So, okay. I hear, I hear that, but Do you need them to create your own stuff? That's what, that's what I'm saying. Is it that the—

Yes. Yes, you do. Only because they have the guns.

Okay, so you can't— so you— are you telling me that people with money that look like you and I can't go and buy some land and start cultivating their own land, build their own homes, build their own communities amongst themselves? What law is needed for that?

It was done in Rosewood. It was done in Tulsa. Again, because certain— some people have guns, you have to, to, to have a seat in that government. You have to have the kind of, uh, the kind of voice that they have to listen to.

Yeah, but there's a lot of people— but that's what I'm saying. That will never happen because regardless of— that goes back to my conversation about power, that, that's so— that'll never happen. And why will that never happen? Because of what the fabric of how the fabric of this country was, was founded. So there has to be a different mindset of I'm gonna have to go to legislation to get X, Y, and Z. You know what, what I found— I find very interesting, um, when it was this Harriet Tubman moved very quietly, and those that she trained moved very quietly to get things done. But today people don't. They feel like they got to include everything and everybody. And my thing is, what happens when you move quietly and you just start to do? You don't, you know, you don't need legislation to buy land. You don't need legislation to, uh, build a house on your land. These are the things that I'm talking about when I say start to create your own. But we keep being hit with excuses of we need this, we need that, we need this, we need that. No, we keep adding ish to the pot that we don't need. So why isn't that not an option?

I'm biting my tongue a little bit, um, You— it still goes back to some of the things that I said before, because you still have people that got the guns, and they will see what you're doing if you're doing it out in the open and want to interfere with it, the same way as you had COINTELPRO, the same way as you had, uh, different organizations that were disrupted. If it's— you have to— yeah, you're absolutely right. You have to walk in silence. You have to be quiet about it. You have to do what you got to do. Um, um, I won't say it's hard. I won't say it can't— I won't say it can't be done. It's a difficult path because of so much of the conditioning that we've undergone.

The—

there's some psychological damage. We— just the way that we even identify ourselves, the words that we use. Every other group on the planet calls themselves by the place that they come from. There's only two groups that call themselves by color. And, and those colors, when you look them up in the dictionary, one, one has a gang of definitions for bad, evil, sick, all this other stuff that doesn't mean the same thing, but they're all encompassed under the same word. And then the other one has all these pure definitions along with that. But it's like breaking out of that brainwashing is, is going to be a very important step in order to get where we need to get. Um, it's not impossible because it wasn't— can I ask you this here in the first place? Yep.

Why is it that We have more freedom, we have more access than those that came before us, but they had more ambition, drive, guts, determination, and willpower than we see now.

Because they weren't distracted with all the things that we're distracted with.

But distraction, nothing can distract you unless you allow it. Like, We choose what we allow to distract us.

Yes, yes, we do.

So, you know, one of the sexiest things when, as a woman, the sexiest thing for us when it comes to men is that we don't hear the excuses of why something can't be done, but we gonna do this. That's a whole different energy. Um, and today we hear a lot of excuses of We can't. And we live in a time where we have access to technology, we have access to resources, we have more— it's easier to become a millionaire, you know, than it has ever been with technology, AI, all of that, right? But people have become weaker. People have become more emotional, sensitive to everything. But yet those that came before us, didn't have none of what we have, and they were built— what they say, built for it tough. But yet it's a completely different ball game now. But at the same time, men want to be respected in this, in a, at a high level, but they keep making excuses for what they can't do. So it's like, that doesn't ignite my femininity on a whole nother level. So the femininity is there, but there's certain things when the masculine shows up, that heightens that femininity and that surrender that that woman will have. But when a woman constantly hears excuses, when a woman constantly hear about systematic this or what they're going to do or this, that is such— it's like, okay, cry me a freaking river. What you— what we gonna do? You know, everybody is bad until it's time. Everybody got a lot to say until it's time. But when somebody says, um, okay, we ready now, what we gonna do? It's like, well, what happened was we gonna have to wait because they gonna— we don't want to hear that immediately. That man, because, because you got to remember, we're ready to ride. We're ready to be like, okay, this masculine machismo man that came up with some type of solution, it may not be nothing that's going to change the world right now, but it's going to change the community right now he's going to implement that. That makes us want to get behind. Women have to get behind a vision. But if all we keep hearing is excuses of why not, it immediately— our vaginas dry up. I'm not even gonna lie, immediately.

It's like, okay, now hold on though. Honestly, you have to— you're gonna have to be quiet. Whatever, whatever is done is gonna have to be quiet.

But my— and that's fine, but what's the done? What's the plan? That's my whole thing. Whatever has to be done, I get it, it has to be done quite— but what's the— what's on the piece of paper? That— what, what is the agenda? That's what I'm talking about. What's the agenda?

Who you, who you gonna share with?

You get people that are like-minded, like you said, skin folk, all skin folk. Yeah, but, but see, you keep coming up with excuses. You get, you, you, you get people—

I said no, I didn't. That's my excuse. I said, who you gonna share?

But, but, and what did I just say? I said you share it with those that are in alignment with your thought pro— like, if it were up to me, my grandchildren would have arranged marriages. They would be raised in a, in a community of people that are like-minded thinkers, because this stuff that's going on now, I wouldn't even want my grandchildren to be a part of. But at the end of the day, I would put them amongst like-minded people so that they could actually, you know, marry those people. But we got to stop making um, excuses. But when I gotta run, I got another gentleman in here. But I appreciate you for coming on, and make sure that you go get you some rest. And then you cut— you come over to Solution. Oh, before I let you go, I see the pillow. Uh-oh, wait, wait, wait, before I let you go, I'm ready. Come on, you had an assignment 2 weeks ago.

Sure did.

Did you do it?

I did.

Okay, tell me about it real quick.

I went out and danced, uh, I danced with a young lady and everything, and it was nice.

Okay, I see you smiling.

Big hug afterwards. Okay, I told her I'd be back.

Uh, you're supposed to meet 3.

I know, not, not big witty banter or anything, but did, did, uh, tell one young lady that, uh, they wanted to mean this in there because her smile is so beautiful.

Because I— well, she got you smiling because you definitely smiling.

No, I ain't— what, that ain't Smiling.

Okay, well, I appreciate you coming on again and keeping us— you always— you are a regular. You have become a regular on the show. We appreciate you. And so I look forward to seeing you soon.

Are you gonna see me?

All right, darling. All right, bye.

All right.

Okay, did I do it right? I think I did it right. Oh wait, hold on. Hello.

Oh, hello ma'am, how you doing today?

I'm good, how are you? Fine. You got a question or comment?

Yes, I got a question ma'am.

Yes.

What's the deal with a woman how to, uh, act feminine, not being masculine?

Say that one more time, my love. I didn't hear you.

I said, why have you have to approve a woman have to be a feminine, not being masculine?

What do you do so a woman can be more feminine and not masculine?

Yes, ma'am.

You have to have masculine energy. Let me explain what I mean by that. Jalen, right?

Yes, ma'am.

All right, Jalen, here's the deal. Women are natural. Women have femininity in them. However, there's different levels of femininity. Sometimes we hear men say, you know, uh, if either a woman is feminine or she's masculine, that's not necessarily the truth. See, the energy of a man, when he makes her feel safe, he gets more of what's already there. So the question becomes Is your energy something that a woman can sink into? Does your energy say safe? Because the more we are around masculine men, the more we sink into that.

Yes, ma'am. But ma'am, I had done— I have done seen too many masculine women in my area. I just had to run away from them.

What? Okay, Jalen, let me ask you this. What is a masculine woman? Describe that to me, please.

Who acts like a man, act like acting out loud and etc., ma'am. Okay, stay away from them.

Okay, so let me ask you this. Why don't you get around feminine women?

I, I've been trying to find something in Tennessee, but I just can't. Just too many women act like men right now.

You in Tennessee?

Yes, ma'am.

How old are you?

28.

What's your ideal woman? Tell me what your ideal woman is.

Ideal woman, feminine, being submissive to men.

Okay, feminine, being submissive to men. So what is— okay, explain before I go there. What— explain what submissive is to you.

I just want a woman to act all submissive, feminine, not being masculine and not act like a man.

So, but submissive means, you know, you want somebody to, to, to be up under you, like, to— so for you kind of to rule over them a little bit. So what is that? What does that look like, like, to you, like a submissive? I get the masculine part, but the submissiveness— because you got to remember, women, feminine women naturally acquiesce or relax in a masculine man's presence. So we don't have to be told to submit, or we don't have to be beat into submission when the man shows up like a man. He's, he's a— he protects. He's a man that has good energy. He has— he's not a nice guy. He's a kind man, because we don't like nice guys, because nice guys are only nice until they don't get what they want. We like somebody with good character, somebody that has integrity, somebody that we can feel safe around. The biggest thing for a woman is for us to feel safe. So the more a woman doesn't feel safe, the more her police energy comes up. That's what we call it, police energy. So if you ever around a woman and all of a sudden she starts pulling back and she's not like just relaxed around you, there's something off in the energy. Okay, so we have to make sure— as of— you have to make sure as a man that you're coming across genuine, that you're coming across as a man that can be trusted, that you can come across as a man that makes a woman feel safe, that you're a man that is not trying to dominate or control a woman, but you're allowing her to be what she is, right? And the more that you can do that and allow a woman to be and not try to get her to be submissive and try to do whatever you want to do, the more she will feel safe with you and she will sink, she will melt into you. So it's nothing that you can actually do other than do you. It's like inner— the energy can be felt. There's been times where I've been around men that I just didn't feel safe with them. They didn't say anything, they didn't do anything, but their energy told me that they were not safe. And so I became more— I came harder. I get— I would say not even hard, I became more firm and assertive with them. I wasn't, I wasn't sinking in like this and looking at them, you know, like a schoolgirl with a crush. I was more so like in protective mode, right? So I understand, sir.

I mean, ma'am.

So, so, so what are you gonna do? What do you think that you can do Jalen, to make a woman feel safe with you?

Trying not to be disrespectful. Okay, a woman.

Well, okay, let me ask you this. When was the last time you had a date?

I tried to get on— I tried to, uh, been out days, but I, I never been on dates. This is exactly why I chose not to be on dates, because I don't trust women nowadays because of this this moderate new age dating thing.

What you been listening to, Jaylen? You've been listening to red pill, blue pill, purple pill content?

I'll be listening to red pill content.

I need you to stop that, okay? Let me, let me help you. You know, I need you to stop that because there's some wonderful women out there that would love to be with you. But you have to understand, when you listen to that content, what it's doing is it's feeding your fears. You just said you haven't been on a date in a You've never been on a date. Is that what you said? So see, that's what I'm saying. You've never been on a date, my love. But you are funneling what they're saying and their experiences, what they're coming up with through your brain and through your experiences that you've never had. Okay? So you've never had those experiences that these men are talking about, but they have you fearful already. Okay, and so I want you to understand that a lot of those guys, all they have to do is really, really develop their character, their integrity, learn how to communicate with a woman, to get some more personality. Okay, so just make sure that you're not listening to things that are— and you're taking them as, as, you know, truth when those are not your experience. You haven't dealt with that because you haven't gone on a date. So there's a wonderful young lady out there, but you gotta— you're only going to attract women that you won't be able to trust because that's what you believe. I need you to get out of the fear and don't take on the experience of other people because these other people, they have your mind on lock and none of this has ever happened to you. You haven't had a woman cheat on you, you haven't had a woman play you or anything. That's what they're talking about. So now you're afraid, and I don't want you to be afraid because I believe there's somebody out there for you.

Yes, uh, April Madison, I encountered some, uh, disrespectful woman before last year. One woman told me, the elf you looking at, that was it.

That was one woman, and we don't— yeah, but we don't— but that was one woman, but we don't judge one person by everybody. Now let me ask you something. What, what, um, do you have a, like, men's mentor, like older men that you, that you hang out with or that you like see, like maybe your dad or uncles or anything like that? I don't go, I don't go out there much no more, ma'am. Okay, what about your dad and your uncles? Do you have any of them in your life?

Uh, my dad passed away. 2 years ago.

Oh, I'm sorry. Okay, so it sounds like to me that you haven't been exposed to a different pool of men that have had— that has success with women. I need you to find that pool. Um, where's the fellas in the comment section that are healthy men that are maybe a part of a group or maybe be able to connect with Jalen to show him that there is a demographic of women that are good women and that will be good for him. Let me know in the comment section where you guys are. Um, yeah, and yeah, somebody said that was an experience you had from a woman on the street. They don't count. You know how many times that we as women have been catcalled and called bitches and, and all kind of names by men on the street? We don't even count that. We don't count that. So If a woman said that to you, that was very disrespectful, but that's one person. That wasn't somebody you were in a relationship with. So I need you— I need you to get a mentor, sir. Okay, man, I know I'm serious. I need— I need you to get a— I need you to get a mentor, a strong mentor who has success, a successful marriage, because it'll show you that there's a whole different there's a whole different conversation being had amongst men with a different mindset. Okay.

Yes, ma'am.

Can you do that for me? I want you to come back and let me know that you got a mentor, because what I don't want you to do is walk in fear behind what somebody else is saying, and that is not your experience.

Yes, ma'am.

Okay, well, thank you for calling in, dear. I appreciate you.

See you later.

All right, bye-bye, baby. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, we got one more. Hey, dear. I can't hear.

I'm sorry, I had my phone on mute. How are you?

I'm good. How are you?

Always a pleasure to hear you. I love the rapidness and the continuousness of your beautiful thoughts and brain. Uh, I watched it the other day, and with the brother from Florida that was a security guard— amazing, amazing. Uh, show. Amazing, uh, Instagram, about 2 or 3 days ago.

Oh yes, yes, when I was sitting at the bar. Yes, yes. Oh my goodness, that was so good. I was in Atlanta. Yeah, yeah, it was, uh, we had a good time.

Yes, I wanted to hop on to help the brothers out because it seems that the brothers are still doing what Adam does. This woman that you gave So God left Adam in charge. Um, even in the Bible it says Jesus came and returned the hearts of the fathers back to the sons and the sons back to the fathers. So we have to fix the mills. Um, a woman only gives you what you give her. She can only open up and receive what you have. She can only multiply what you have. Uh, when a man enters a woman, he gets her pregnant, he actually leaves his semen, which stays in her brain for up to 7 years. So if you don't have anything in your brain, brother, a woman can't magnify anything. That's what Miss Mason is trying to tell a lot of you brothers, that you have to come with something in your brain. So a man has two penises. His first penis is his genius. If you don't have a genius, meaning that you don't know what your purpose is, you will only mess up and misalign all of the women in your life. Father means source, sustainer, protector, progenitor, and foundation of the house. So a man is supposed to father everything that he comes around, even when he doesn't have children. So I want to lend something to the men. They always— we always put all of these challenges on women, and we say what women can't do, and you want them to submit. Do you guys know that in ancient times, the women were the ones who ruled the marketplace? That's where you got Proverbs 31, the 31 Woman, from. The men had to stay at home in the tent to actually protect all of the valuables so no other men would actually come into the tent and steal those. So the woman is the one who actually goes out and she produces, and she's in the marketplace, and her husband is proud of her, but he has to be a protector. He has to provide the right environment also. The only power that a man can truly have is when he has a principal penis. Everything else outside of you can't be controlled. So I know we mentioned about power. His power is in his no, to say, uh, to say no to any and everything that comes across his path that tries to pull him away from his purpose. I've never cheated. I'll be 50 next month in about 25 days. Um, I, I could never get a woman to make me cheat, and the reason why is my ego is too big. Most people think that's an arrogant statement, but ego means myself, my sense of I, of me, of who I am on the inside. So I know if I cheat on my commitment, I first cheat on Bryant before I injure anybody else. So I just wanted to come in here and lend you some support. I love what you do. I'm always trying to help the brothers keep their mind together. Uh, Marcus, you need to run and get a restraining order taken out on that woman, or get one taken out on yourself. Um, I love what you do for both, uh, both sexes. I'm in most of your, your lives. You're one of the only women that when you come on, I'm watching every time, and I'm watching.

I appreciate you.

I love what you do, Lady Mason.

Thank you.

Keep on serving and sowing, uh, benevolence, elegance, and radiance to, uh, men and women. One other thing, you asked about a solution. So Black people only make up 13.6% of the population. It's about 40 million people. If we can get 30 million people putting in $7.50 per month, that's $900 million per month that you could have in a pot for Black communities where you can start in one city and you bring in counselors, you have loans, you have training programs, you have curriculums. You start in one city and you keep going city to city. And I would call it, uh, WIN, the Wakanda Investment Network. And I got the idea from seeing $83 million raised for Kamala Harris in a couple of days. So we don't understand that in the back of the dollar, E Pluribus Unum, in the, in the eagle's wings, it says one formed by many. So if we could get on the same page and the same pace and stop fighting each other and being at war with each other, because most men always say submit and they get it from Ephesians, uh, 5:22. But if you look at Ephesians 5:21, it says submit ye one to another. So submission— I said this on, on your first, um, your first Feminine Era— it means to go under and support. So sub means to go under, and a mission is a purpose. So I would submit to you, uh, more, uh, questions about business because you run multiple businesses. So submission is not a bad thing. And men, we just brag and we wear it as a badge of honor, and most of us are not worthy of submission. So in order for us to become that, you have to know where you're weak and where your mate is strong. That's how you become powerful. Two can put, um, ten thousand to flight. So love what you do, Miss Mason. I will continue to watch and look and learn and bloom well.

I appreciate you. Thank you so much for always being a supporter. You have a good evening, love.

Thank you very much.

All right, bye-bye. All right, ladies and gentlemen, that's all I have for you tonight. You know, I had to get a little about that life a little bit. Y'all know I'm from Oakland, stop playing with me. You know, she's, she's gonna always be a lady, but when you come in here taking shots, you know, your girl, your girl always got ammo. And like I said, fellas, this, this is never to make you feel bad, or some would say dim your— break your spirit. It's to have conversations, to have real conversations, like real, real conversations. And it doesn't matter, you know, what your race is. He brought up Black women because we weren't even talking about race. And you can't say those things, me being a Black woman, and expect me not to remind you of what you don't have. Like, that, that, that ain't— that ain't That's not it. We don't get down like that. Blake, how many people we have, you think?

Um, right now we're at 750.

Nice. Across the board. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Um, she like, whose show is it anyway? I'm just saying, you know, you just can't do that because the thing is, that's what this platform is for. This platform is not like the blue pill, the green pill, the purple pill. And you can tell by the people, some of the people that come in here with that stuff. It's like you need a hug, you know? You need a hug because if everything that you come out with is pointing the finger at other people— I'm reading letters from men. I don't know what the race of the man is, but I'm reading letters from men who are actually coming for help. And when you come in here pointing fingers and talking about what we're not and all that, y'all have to remember, although I am a lady See, I'm from the Bay Area. And everything, if you know anything about Bay Area people, they always say we are just the laid back, coolest people. Anytime I come across someone and I tell 'em from the Bay, they always have the same thing to say. Bay Area people are just laid back, cool, until you F around and find out. We don't just, we are not just out here, you know, just coming up and spewing things. We are literally people that we just enjoy ourselves. We roam around, we dance, we have a great time. But if you try us, understand we will give it to you so that you understand who you're dealing with. Yeah, we lay in the cut, we enjoy ourselves. He said, you went off. I'm like, what the— actually, I didn't go off. That's the thing. See, let me, let me, let me, let me address that. I didn't go off. The problem is it's the same thing that Will Smith had to deal with. Everybody said Will Smith was faking. See, he had this image and he was a fake. No, y'all just don't know us like that. That, that's the thing that people don't understand. People see you on social media, but they only see what you show. So when they were saying that Will Smith, you know, he comes across as the good guy and all that. No. But you don't know this man on his day to day. As you saw, he slapped Chris Rock. Well, if you read his book, which I did prior to this happening, it wasn't a surprise to me that he would do something like that because he talked about it and how he is in his book. And so I didn't go off and we have to— we have to learn how to use other words. I didn't go off. I had a dialog with a young man. And had to explain exactly my standpoint. But I'm not always going to be in the light feminine, always just so, "Ah, Angie Reese is just so positive." No, I stand up for myself. I stand up for myself. I don't— sometimes people will say, "Well, some things don't have to be addressed." But certain things do. I think when we don't address things, People think that it's okay. No, I have boundaries, and I will say what I need to say. And one thing you're not going to do as a Black woman on here having conversation with men of all races, come and take a dig at me and tell me what my Black woman this and that, and I'm helping y'all. That's what you're not gonna do, okay? Because I have boundaries. Right. And also, I, I, in my comment section, I like to make sure there's no foolishness going on and no arguing and bickering back and forth, because you can take that over to the blue pill crew, the white, the red pill crew, crew, the purple pill crew. We don't do that over here. So as you know, ladies, you guys did really good tonight. You guys listened to the house rules. You guys did real good in the comment section, um, tonight, because we want to always make sure that this is a place where men feel seen, heard, and understood. And even when they come on, or that I'm reading their letters, that we are always respectful to them. Even if it sounds like something crazy, or they do something, none of that matters. We always want to make sure we continue to have the fellas to come back. Oh yeah, that's what it was. He told us to stay in our place, and I'm like, let me, let me help you sir, about I Too Know Where Your Place Actually Is. Okay, you guys have a wonderful night. I hope to see you next week. What, next week? Yes, I'll be— yeah, next week is Tuesday. I think I fly right out after that. Yeah, I have a flight to catch right after our show next week. I have to go to the Country Music Awards, um, next week. So I believe we'll do the show and then I'll book my flight, um, for later on. When is the 24th? Let me see. Um, because I have to go to— okay, that's a Sunday, so I'll be back. So I have to go to Vegas for that. Um, but yes, thank you all. I'm glad you guys are coming in. You guys can rewatch this on YouTube, and we— once it's edited, you will be able to go on Apple Podcasts and be able to listen to it after Blake edits it. He does a great— he does a good— you do a great job editing it out, all of this, all of the, all of the stuff. Um, so make sure you tune into that. Also go over to my YouTube channel and subscribe. We're almost at 100,000 subscribers, and I would love for you to go over there, especially for those of you they want to watch it in full screen. I don't know how— we haven't figured out how just yet on YouTube— excuse me, on Instagram— how to expand so you can see the full screen. Don't know yet, um, but if you want to watch the full, um, screen version, you can always go to YouTube, and my YouTube is under April Mason TV. So until next time, my loves, Enjoy the rest of your week. Understand that only you have the ability to change your situation, situation by making what I call an identity shift. And fellas, understand that you're wanted, needed, and desired. We just need you to rise up a little bit, just a little bit. All right, bye.