The Feminine Ear Live Call In Podcast Debut

my loves, to the feminine ear, where men are seen, heard, and understood. My name is April Mason. Actually, my name is Dr. April Mason. How you— how you doing? And some of you have wondered, Miss April, where have you been? What have you been doing? My Instagram, I've been playing over there for a little while, but I haven't been over here on YouTube in years. I started on YouTube— my very first YouTube video was in 2008, and I started on the femininity, uh, dating and relationship. I got into that space, my very first video was in 2011. So I'm not new to this, loves. I am true to this. I'm one of the OGs in the game that took a little break over the last several years to see what I wanted to do. Only wanted to do things that brought me joy, and that was really it. And to live life, became an empty nester, all those wonderful things. And you guys know I have been helping women for almost 15 years embrace their femininity to make identity switches. And I have a pretty great success rate of helping women to get engaged and married in the year, even though that's not what I do. I would help women embrace their femininity, and as a byproduct of becoming a better woman, they met a different caliber of man. That was not my intention. I, you know, when I help women with their femininity, it's to, it's to get all of the benefits of what femininity is. I just happen to get testimonials about the man because Regardless of what women say, women love men. All right, fellas, so for those of you that are listening, women love you. Can't stop talking about you. We have the whole decenter men, screw these men, let's go and, and live on farms by ourselves. At the end of the day, someone that no longer smokes crack does not talk about crack, okay? Someone that's no longer an alcoholic don't talk about alcohol every day. So if you really want to know what the truth is, women really want you. But I just believe we are in a time where the pool is dirty, honey. The pool is dirty. Instagram, YouTube, and Facebook— the pool is dirty. And I'm here to do a little bit of kind of bridging the gap, okay? Just bridging the gap. Because at the end of the day, men want women, women want men. And my whole reason for my reasoning for doing this is, is a little personal, um, to me as well too. Back in 2020, in 2020, I was ra— you know, took on and, and was raising a young man as my own after his mother passed away. Well, he committed suicide in 2020, uh, on right around— he was 27 years old, and that spoke volumes to me. And then shortly after that, I had to talk my own son out of su— his suicide attempt. So for me, men having a platform to be able to speak and to be able to be heard is very, very important to me. Because when you're in that situation and you know that if they may have had somebody to talk to, if he had someone to talk to, he might have still been here, right? So it's very important to me, and I understand that men need a platform regardless of what the the world says, and men should know, they should know. Honestly, what I've learned doing this work for so long is men don't know. We give them a lot of credit for knowing some things that they do not, uh, know. So with that, here lies The Feminine Ear. All right, so let's get right into the show. How it works is like this, fellas. If you're here and you have a question just click the link in the chat. If you are not on my YouTube page, make sure you go to thefeminineear.com and you click the link, and then you click the red button and it says go live, and you can ask your question and we will go from there. However, we have quite a few men that were, let's say, a little shy to call in and talk to me, so we have Listen, y'all, when I said that you guys could submit questions, the questions are questioning. Can— is it possible to bring that over here so I don't have to keep looking on that side? So the questions have been questioning, honey, and so I have pages of questions, and maybe some of the fellas are here actually listening so that they can get their question answered. I also have a couple segments that I will be, um, introducing tonight. It won't just be me answering questions, but I also I still have a few segments that I will be able to go through tonight, so bear with me. This is so— this is fun. This, this, this makes me feel good. And I, like I said, I'm only doing things in this season that actually makes me feel good. So y'all ready to get into the, into the questions that these fellas have? Because some of them are, some are very interesting. Let me know in the chat if you're ready for me to get to the questions, honey. Oh goodness, let's see which one I want to start with. Hmm, hold on, I got some on my phone too because I couldn't print them all out. Oh, it's on that phone. Ah, it's on that phone. Wait a minute, let me see if I can get to them on this phone because y'all, there was one that was very— there was very interesting about the S-word. Y'all know what the S-word is? The S word. Submission, y'all. Hold on. Oh God, I, I gave you the wrong phone. I gave you the phone. Let's see, let me see if I can find them because I do have a list of them in my phone, in my email, because I emailed them to myself, but I gave him the phone. Dootail. Oh, y'all said Dootail. Let's go, let's go. No, it wasn't about— y'all, we ain't talking about no sex just yet. We will, but not just yet. Okay, so let's see, where did he go? Where did he go? Oh, okay, let's, let's get to it. Oh my goodness. Yeah, fellas, what I've learned about you is I don't think you understand women. And I believe that's why many of you are having a hard time, because you don't understand women, because you never picked up a book. And you know, it's not just— it's not your fault. You're not wired to actually get to know women for women. You're actually wired to get to know women for procreation reasons and fun reasons. All right, so with that, when you understand why you don't dive deeper in it, it makes you want to either evolve or say this is too much work. Okay, okay, where did— okay, where'd it go? Let— where'd it go? Here we— ah, I found him! I found him in the email! I found him! All right, let's go, let's get to the Let's go. This is for Tim. I call Tim Traditional Tim. All right, fellas, remember, if you, if you want to go live with me or you want to have your— ask your question live, just click on thefeminineear.com and you can ask your— click the red button, you can ask your question. So this is from who I deemed him as Traditional Tim. Tim says, I'm a conservative guy who believes in traditional gender roles. I think a man should be the provider and a woman should take care of the home and kids, but every time I bring this up to my girlfriend, she gets defensive and says that's outdated thinking. I'm not trying to be controlling, I just think it's fair division of roles. How do you— I explain my perspective in a way that doesn't offend her? Okay, first of all, Traditional Tim, let me say this to you. You're having this conversation with a girlfriend Blink. You're having this conversation with a girlfriend, and you're having the conversation with someone that does not have your same beliefs. So my question to you, Tim, is why are you trying to make a round peg fit into a square hole? I believe that a lot of times what people do is they choose people that they are not in alignment with and then you try to make them become something that they're not. If she believes that's outdated and you believe that this is something that you strongly believe, Tim, why are you with her? Tim, why are you with her if she doesn't believe the same things that you believe? What we have to stop doing is believing that we can actually change people. You can't. And I believe that when you have the lack mentality, you try to hold on to someone that you believe has most of what you want, but you feel like, well, if I let them go, I may not get anything better. And let me say this, I have a different view of the 80/20 rule. It's gonna sound a little— it's gonna sound a little different. I know we hear a lot of people say the 80/20 rule is why give up 80% of what you want for 20%. I say why accept 80% of what you want when what you need is in the 20%? Think about that. If you have core needs that are like loyalty and the, uh, you know, for Tim, for you, it sounds like this is something that is deep. This is like a core value of yours, the traditional man. If is important for you. This is a part of one of your core needs. So why are you trying to hold on to 80% of the wants, which is whatever else this woman brings, but you're overlooking your 20%— your needs are in your 20%? So for me, I just don't understand the, the 80/20 rule the way, you know, that we've heard of. You don't give up 80% of what you want for 20%. Yes, you do. You give up 20— 80% of wants for 20% of what you doggone need. That's just my perspective. And Tim asked me, so, Tim, why are you trying to hold on to the 80%? Because guess what? That 20% that you're complaining about, it's a big deal. That little piece right there. Is the thing that's stopping you guys from going forward. So if she has everything else that you say you want, why are you complaining? Think about that. Why are you complaining if the wants were so important? They're not. So my advice to everybody is figure out your core needs, and then from there, choose a person on your core needs, not your wants, because I will throw 80% back for the 20%. Well, nobody's perfect, but here's the thing. Let me, let me explain that nobody's perfect and why they are. If you get someone that meets 20% of what your core needs are, but if your core needs are in that 20% and they meet that, that is your perfect match. Bloop. I'm going to say it again. If you meet someone and they satisfy your core needs, which is the 20%, they are your perfect match. At that point, you can forego the, oh, she has to have these type of hips and she has to have these type of breasts and she has to have these type of— those are wants. She has to be this tall and she has to speak this language and she has— those are wants. But if she comes in and she says, I'm a traditional woman and I believe in what you believe that satisfies your core need, one of your— whatever that core need is. But right now, that's a small piece, um, that's one thing that you guys are having a conversation about, but everything else are wants, and everything else is great. Okay, so that's for Tim, everybody. That is for Tim. Tim, I hope you are watching, my love, and I hope that I was able to give you some perspective. Now, next question is, um, uh, okay, hold on, I had to look. There's, there's a couple of them that I wanted to make sure I hit tonight. Oh, let's, let's, let's talk to who I called him friend-zoned Frank. Let's talk about friend zone, Frank. Frank, if you are watching, love, I picked your question and let's get to it. Frank says, I'm stuck in the friend zone and it's driving me crazy. I've been really close with this woman for about a year and we're— hey, we hang out all the time. I've dropped hints that I'm interested in more, but she keeps telling me how great it is that we're such good friends. I don't want to ruin the friendship, but I can't keep pretending I'm okay with just being a buddy. What should I do to let her know how I feel without pushing her away? Frank, Frank, Frank, let's— let me drink this water. Frank, Frank, let me be frank. You're doing everything except tell her that you like her. Uh, here's the thing, everybody gets afraid of what if I push him away, what if I push them away, what if I lose the friendship. Here's the thing, you are hanging around this woman, you are being her friend, but you're not being forthcoming. Which leads me to another question that I definitely have to, um, address, uh, when it comes to the nice guy. You're doing everything except ask her out. Frank, everybody want to be a big man until it's time. You want to play big, but little got you. So I say Put your big boy drawers on, put your Superman drawers on, and ask her out. The reason why she keeps telling you, my love, that, oh, you're a good friend, is because you keep hitting around. We don't take hints. And see, if she's a woman anything like myself, we don't take hints well. You either have to say it Or we don't know it. A lot of women are like me, and we don't take your kind gestures or you buzzing around or hanging around as an invitation to come into your world romantically unless you say so. We don't know. Well, some men will say, well, you know, if he's doing all this stuff for you, he likes you. How— why can't it be he opens his mouth and says that? Why will you do all of these things, exert all of this energy, but open your mouth? Frank, I want you to do this. I want you to walk up to her. Matter of fact, don't do that. Don't even do that. I want you guys to go out because you're friends, and I want you to look her in her face from across the table and say, look, Charlene, I like you. I like you more than— more than just my friend, and here's why. And you say that, and you tell her all of the wonderful things about her that she might not have even noticed herself, okay? And then you stop showing up as a friend, you start showing up as that man, okay? You stop tippy-toeing around her. Because the thing is, for some women, you can't get out of the friend zone. But most men don't get out of the friend zone because they continue to stay timid. And then this is how this friend zone thing work on the flip side. If a woman cannot imagine herself having sex with you, you're going to always be in the friend zone. So I need you to sexy it up, Frank. Go get a haircut, you know, fresh lineup. I don't know, you know, your ethnicity or anything like that. But go get yourself groomed. Put on a cologne that smells good. Put on a shirt that show a little bit of muscle or something like that, right? Because friend zone mean we don't see ourselves having sex with you. So if we don't, we can't imagine that, you gonna be friends, honey. We're just gonna be friends. So give her a reason to look at you and say, oh Frank, I never noticed that you've had muscles like that before. And you say something like because you ain't been looking hard enough. You have to change the power dynamic, okay? You have to change that frame. You're gonna have to change that because if you don't, I'm telling you, you're going to be friend-zoned forever and you're going to be forever waiting on her to make a move. But she sees you as a friend, and women don't make moves on friends that they don't see themselves having sex with. For my Instagram folks, if you want to join the podcast, go on over to YouTube under April Mason TV and join me over there, darling. And fellas, if you're here and you have a question, go to thefeminineear.com, click on the, the link that says ask your question, and I can answer your question with you right now live. All right, so that would be my answer for you, Frank. Stop, stop being a punk. And go get the girl. And here's the thing, here's the thing, Frank, I'mma tell you this. We like when you guys come get us, Frank. We like when you guys come get us. See, we like when you apply respectful pressure. Respectful pressure looks like this. It doesn't— it looks like you are caring. You care about our well-being. You check on us. You know, that's what that actually looks like when you apply pressure. You let us know that you're interested. You know, you ask us out on dates. You make freaking plans, Frank. There's nothing worse than a man that likes you that does not make plans. He watches you from afar. Okay? So Frank, what you gonna do? I need you to send me another message, Frank, after you do this and tell me what happened. But if you don't make plans, if you don't grab Charlene and you grab her by her hands ever so gently and say, I like you, Charlene, and I would love to take you out for a romantic dinner as someone that's not your friend but someone that is romantically interested in you. Oh, we like that. It's like, oh really? And even if she didn't find you sexually attractive, it's something about a man that has some bravado in his voice and he says it with his chest and he looks you dead in the eye and he's smelling good all at the same time and he's clean cut, got the fresh haircut and everything. And he's just like, look, We like that, Frank. Okay, we like that, Frank. How y'all liking the show so far? How y'all liking it so far? Like, I appreciate you guys bearing with me. This is so— this is going to be fun. I believe this is going to be, um, fun. Like I said, the fellas can call in at any time, but we have so many that wanted to remain anonymous So we have a whole lot of, um, of questions. And I gotta say, ladies, let me say this to you because y'all getting on my nerves already. Let me say this, y'all getting on my nerves because it clearly says on our website only men can call in and submit questions. Y'all have been sending over dissertations. You can't even sit back and let the men have an opportunity to have the floor. So I had to sift through quite a few of your messages of why I'm in this and why I'm in that and why I'm in this and why I'm in that. Thank you so much, Dominique 77. Share the link, share the video. Thank you so much. Like, subscribe, share. This is every Tuesday night at what time? 9 PM Eastern Standard Time. All right, so we're gonna have a good time. Hopefully we'll get the fellas that, you know, that said they were gonna call in. Miss April, I gotta call in, I gotta talk to you because there was so many of you that said, I think, you know, that you gonna help me find my wife. I can't, I can't do that if you don't talk to me. You got to talk to me, all right? But if you don't, if you're afraid to talk, here we go right here. Let's see, let's see my next, my next question. Look, see y'all, look at all this, y'all. The fellas have been sending it in, girls. And ladies, although I don't take your questions, this allows you to be a fly on the wall and hear what the men are thinking and hear what they are feeling. And so, you know, you can take this information back and process it without, you know, overthinking it, you know, and without interrupting them, because y'all interrupt the fellas a lot, you know. Y'all be so anxious. To tell somebody they wrong and to speak your peace or speak from your trauma. That's not what this is about. This is not about problems. This is about solutions. Y'all know what— y'all know what my, my goal is with this. My goal, my loves, is to get us back to a place where we get excited to go out on dates again. That you meet someone at the Home Depot and you guys lock eyes and, and he sees you, you see him. And he comes over respectfully and he introduces himself. Fellas, I'm gonna give you one of my pickup lines. You know, some of y'all have heard it before because I have said it before on Instagram, but since this is a new show, fellas, I'm gonna give you a respectful way to approach a lady that always have us kiki and have you in the group chat. So this is what you do before I move on to the next question. This is what you do. You see her and you spot her coming across the plywood section, and she got this little dress on and she looking good, she's smelling good, whatnot. So you approach her and you say, oh, excuse me, um, I couldn't help but notice you're a beautiful woman, and I don't mean to be disrespectful, but are you single? And she's going to say— hopefully she says no— and then you say Do you want to be? I'm just saying, it works like a charm every time. It works like a charm every time. You ask her, do she want to be? And then you introduce yourself. Hi, my name is Keith. Nice to meet you. We're going to smile and we're going to get in the car and we would have already exchanged numbers with you. And what we're going to do Girls, guess what I make this man— you know what he said? He asked me, was I single? I told him yes. He asked me if I wanted to be— that's what we're gonna do. And then what you're gonna do from there, fellas, right after you say that, before you even start your car and get in the car and leave that store, you're gonna text her. See, let me explain something to you. Now I have to give this disclaimer. The disclaimer is this: when I'm speaking, I'm not talking about these basic low-hanging fruit, bitter, um, afraid, walk in fear, um, always looking for narcissistic red flags, toxic masculinity women. I am not talking about them. Leave them alone. There's no helping them. Because they won't change their beliefs. I'm not— I'm never talking about them. I'm talking about when you approach a woman in a respectful manner and she's receptive. That's what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about the ones that are walking around with the resting bitch faces. I'm not talking about the ones that's trying to just, you know, get you to take them out. No, I'm not talking about her. I'm talking about the woman that's receptive. And if you are a man that's in tune spiritually— that's something we're going to get into later on down the road— you can feel the energy of the individual. Now, doesn't mean that she's going to be a match. Everybody you meet won't be the one, but at least we need to get back to having good interactions and good moments. You know, it doesn't have to think— you don't have to think about, is she the one or is he the one? It's in this moment. I like how this feels. I like how she responded back to me. I like how he approached me. Now, after you've done the approach and you text her once you get in the car and say, hey, I just wanted to let you know it was a pleasure meeting you. I would love to have a conversation. Are you free tonight at such and such time? Or if you— but if you really bad, If you really bold like that, you say, say you met her on a Tuesday, you say, are you available for dinner Saturday night at 7? If you're that kind of guy. Hey, Bear Jones, I'm just saying, sir. I'm trying to give y'all the game. I'm trying to give you fellas the game. If you bold like that, you ask her. You could even say it like this. You could text her and say, you know, it was a pleasure meeting you. I know this is kind of forward, but are you available Saturday night at 7 for dinner? I'd like to get to know you better. She can text back, maybe. Maybe not. And then what she should say, if it were me, is, well, if you're the type of man that my energy might sense you are, maybe after we talk I might let you take me out Saturday night at 7. You see how fun that was? You, you see there was no, what you want, what you looking for, I ain't got time to be playing. You see, there was nothing— there was Andre. See, Andre said that definitely works. There was nothing that was just, just mean and, and just nasty and just, you know, just a nasty individual, nasty energy. It was none of that. It was fun. So my goal with this is to get us back to a place where we get excited about getting dressed up and going on dates. Uh, Evelyn over on Instagram said, um, I would love to be approached that smooth, no pressure or desperation. Exactly, exactly. Witty batter at— witty banter at its finest. Andre, that's my thing. Like, I can go toe to toe with you with some witty banter. And for women, a man that is very, um, forward but respectful, because some, some, some, some of y'all, you're just here to learn. You're here to learn how to approach a woman respectfully. Hey Calvin! But it's— it makes us feel good to be pursued, all right? So that's how you ask, you know, a woman out. So who was I— I was talking to Friendzone Frank. Frank, come on, I need you to— I need you to get with it. All right, so let's move on to our next question. Um, okay, James. This is James. James says, Miss April, look, after my divorce I started dating again, but every woman I meet seems to compare me to her ex. How do I break this cycle of being someone's second choice? Hmm, that's interesting. Well, James, who's 45 years old, I'll say this: if this is a recurring situation for you, let's look at it a little bit different. I look at things from an energetic perspective. And could it be, James, that because you've been divorced— and I don't know who filed, but let's say she filed for divorce— let's say the reason why you continue to meet women that are stuck on their exes and you feel second best is because you really feel second best. You really don't feel good enough at this point. Maybe, just maybe, the divorce have you second-guessing who you are. Oh, I really, um, Suki's— hold on, she said, dang, April, from 529 watching to 829 in 4 minutes. Thank y'all so much. Thank you, thank you. So much for liking, sharing, and commenting. Thank y'all so much. I can't see on my end, um, how many people are here. I just see the likes because on my end I thought, I thought I only had 192, 193 people in here, but that's 195 likes. Wonderful. So getting back to James, a lot of times when we consistently deal with the same type of situations. And let's, let's talk about me. Let's talk about me. Y'all know, for those of you who have been following me a while, you know I use myself as an example. So for a while, I think I was dating maybe in 2017, and I was dating y'all because y'all know I believe that dating is nothing more than collecting data. So I was dating like 4 or 5 guys at the same time. And no, I wasn't sleeping with them. I was dating because I wasn't looking to be in a relationship. And I have been— I've been married, I've been divorced, my kids are grown. So I was enjoying the empty nester life, right? So what happened, James, is this: all 5 guys were good guys. However, even if I did want something more I couldn't have gotten it from them. And the reason for that, uh, the reason for that is I was emotionally unavailable. I was a great date, so I was meeting people that were like me— quality casual people. So they all were like— they treated me like a lady. All of them treated me like a lady. But it was something— there was a block that constantly kept coming up that if we wanted to be together, we couldn't. Like, for instance, James, um, there was— I call Mr. NFL. Mr. NFL, we met, everything was cool, and we were going strong. All of a sudden, Mr. NFL just— all of a sudden, he just pulled away, okay? And I didn't chase because I don't chase. You know, you pull away, child, you just go on your own. I'm not— I'm not chasing you, right? And so one day he called me at like 8, 7 something, and 8 in the morning, something like that. And he knew I would— we are, you know, we're dating other people because we were not in an exclusive relationship. And he texted me one morning at like— it had to be about 8 o'clock because when I woke up I'm like, oh, what are you texting me this early for? What's going on? He said, I don't care, I don't know who— if anybody is over there, because he knew We weren't exclusive, but so he was just like, I don't care if you got anybody over there, your grandkids, your kids, another man, I don't care what you have going on. I'm on my way over there because I'm tired of hurting people that I care about. All right? So Mr. NFL comes to my house, James, and by the time I wake up and wash my face and brush my teeth, I'm like, he'll be all right because he can't even get through the gate. Security is not going to let him through the gate. Child, he done got through the gate. I don't know how he got through the gate, but he got through the gate. And next thing I know, I'm coming out of the bathroom with my robe on and he's knocking on the door. And I'm like, well, what's the deal? What, what, what do you want? Number one, he couldn't— we could— he— I couldn't connect with him because he said, April, I know that you just became an empty nester, and before I met you, I was dealing someone with someone and I got her pregnant. Well, you know, I wasn't gonna deal with that. He knew I wasn't gonna deal with that, child, because at that time my youngest was— my kids are 30, 28, and 26 now. So at that time my youngest had to be maybe 19. So, you know, yeah, I wasn't getting ready to do that. I won't get ready to do that. So that was that one. There was another one we couldn't connect. Really great guy, but guess what? He was coming— he had came out of relationship and he was, he was not ready to do anything. There was another one, and it was pretty much the— it was the same patterns until I had to say, why do you meet men that even if you like them and if you wanted to commit, you couldn't? Like, what, what, what was that? And James, let me tell you something, James, that's when I had to realize that I was the problem. Yeah. So I say that, James, to say, do you believe that you are someone's number one choice? Or because of your divorce, do you believe that you are damaged goods and second best? Think about that. So that would be my answer to— is for you to do a, um, soul search. Do a soul search, James, and figure out why you don't feel good enough to be chosen as somebody's number one. Okay, let me post this in the, in the comment section. Got a question, fellas? Oh wait, am I— it might be folks— wait, oh no, there we go. So you got to understand that anytime you keep getting the same thing— like, fellas, if you keep getting women you have to rescue, y'all know y'all love being Captain Sabre. If you constantly keep getting women that you have to freaking rescue, you're the problem. Thank you guys for a Super Chat. Okay, I'm learning how this works. I'm learning how this works. Thank you so much. As I was— as I said, you are the problem, especially fellas. If you constantly get women that need saving, if you constantly meet women that, um, that only want you for what you could— what you have, not who you are, you are the problem. All right, so I wanted to say that because I've gone through this, James, so I, I can speak to it a little bit, that I was the problem. It's no different than what I would tell anyone else. If you continue to get the same results, you are the problem. Let's keep it going. These questions are— these questions are pretty good. Um, okay, here's David. David said, I've been married, Miss April, for 15 years, but we've lost the spark. I love my wife and I want to rekindle the romance, but I'm not sure how to bring it up without making her feel bad. Where do I even start? Oh, if any of you guys have followed me for a while, you know romance is my thing. Romance is my thing. So David, if you feel like you've lost the spark, especially after 15 years, I can understand that. I've been married, so I totally get But let me tell you something, David, before we even get to the romance part. Did you know that doing things— like, when I say doing things, doing simple things— turns our spark on? Like picking the kids up from school without having to ask. Like, she come home and the laundry is done. It's so sexy to see you mopping the floor. Oh, a Swiffer. Oh my goodness. Yes, yes, yes, and yes, absolutely. So when you start taking things off of our plate, it frees us up. Now let me give you a breakdown of how the feminine energy work. We have a lot of people on the internet talking about femininity, and they are clueless and don't know what the hell they talking about. Okay, um, we have people selling you on that femininity is something you can buy at the beauty supply store. We have people telling you that femininity is decorum and that it's class and, you know, that it's elegance. It has nothing to do with that. We have people teaching you that femininity is elegance and it's a luxury. I'm so tired of this whole luxury community, darling. They tell you that, right? Then they even tell you that feminine women don't have masculine energy. She a masculine woman. Okay, no, let me help you. We've been here. The, the conversation that says, um, either she's feminine or she's not. Let me help you guys with this whole femininity thing as an OG in the game that has been doing this work for almost, um, 15 years. And I have the receipts. Y'all see my receipts to prove it. Femininity, fellas. If you feel like a woman, her femininity is either— she either has it or she doesn't. It doesn't go on and off. Let me tell you something. No, a woman's femininity does not go on and off. However, there's levels to this. See, everybody doesn't get the same level of femininity. What you get is based upon what your energy is to that woman, okay? So it's not that she's not feminine, it's more might be your energy. So I, I hate to hear that when, you know, I hear men say, you know, if she either feminine or she not, she don't turn it on enough, turn it off. No, she turns it down for you. Because your energy doesn't say that you're safe. We look for safe energy, fellas. So if you ever want to know if a woman feels safe with you, look to see if she acquiesce when she's around you. Toodles. If she doesn't acquiesce when she's around you, you ain't, you know, him. So it's not that— now, but hold on, let me give this disclaimer. There is a demographic of women that just rah-rah. I'm always— remember, I'm not talking about them. I have nothing for them. I have nothing to say. That's a whole— I let the other podcasters and the conversations and the panels, I let them handle that. That's not what this is. I'm talking about a completely different demographic of woman. All right, so understand, you know, when I say that, um, when I share these things with you, I'm not talking about— but what about the woman that I'm not talking about her? Okay, so a woman that is comfortable in her femininity, one of the things that femininity comes with, fellas, is boundaries. One of the things femininity comes with, and what I've taught the women that I've coached, is a woman that's connected to her femininity, spirituality, sensuality, and wisdom is a force to be reckoned with. So if she, if she is a spiritual, spiritually led woman, she can feel how much of her she should present to you. So it's not that she goes in and out. She can become a little bit harder. I know I do. When the energy is not right around, when I'm around certain men, I become like more stoic. And I'm like, I'm still a girl, but all of my senses are heightened. I take, my girlfriend, Tanya, my best friend, she says, you take on— it's like a policewoman energy. It's like there's something— you're still girly, you still smile, but there's this, this, this block that comes up, or this— I don't— she couldn't really explain it. She said, but you take on this type of energy. And yeah, she said, I could tell. Matter of fact, we were on a double date in Nashville, um, not too long ago, uh, her husband— it was me and someone else. And she says her husband told her April don't like him. And she said, yeah, because April got her policewoman energy up. Like, I didn't feel comfortable. You know, it was nice, but he didn't— listen, listen, you, you— yes, you just got to be him. You, you— and your energy says that. Your energy will say that. So Um, to get the— let's get back to James and getting the spark. No, David and getting the spark back with his wife. David, start taking some things off of her plate, please. Okay, start taking some things off of her plate, like household chores and just doing little— matter of fact, get her a card just because, right? And then take, take her to a nice dinner, because I love the fact that you said, I want to work it out with my wife. I want to get that spark back with my wife. I love the fact that you said that. So because you said that, let's do something about it. How about pick out or even go buy her a dress that you like to see her in? Or one she has in the closet, take it out of the closet and say, I'd love to see you in this. We're going to dinner Saturday. We have reservations. Mm. Okay, I already got a babysitter, we're good, handle it. So you've taken some things off of her plate, and then you take her to a nice candlelight dinner and you sit back and you tell her, we've been married 15 years and I love everything about you. And you go in and tell— give her your spiel, but then you say, even with all of that, this is what I feel. I feel like there is a disconnect, and the last thing I want is that. Yep, pick her up from work. I like that one. So have the conversation, and then you put it on her and say, do you feel the same way? And is— what can we do to bridge that gap so we can come back together? Those are the conversations that you need to have. So David, let me know, let me know what, what works, if that works for you, and, uh, send me another message. It's one that I wanted. I can't find him. Um, it was something because it's something that I really, really wanted to address. Because I believe a lot of men— this was a perfect question for me to address it. Let's see, but I will— if I can't find that, this particular one, because there's so many It's a, um, I can't really, I can't find it at the moment, but I'll, I'll just, I'll discuss it, um, anyway. So fellas, one of the things that, um, we hear a lot about is women don't want the nice guy and nice guys finish last. We hear that all the time. And so, and I'm here to tell you, if no one has ever told you, fellas, listen to me and listen to me close. We don't like nice guys. I'm gonna let the comments catch up. Fellas, we don't like nice guys. Instagram, we don't like nice guys. Okay. Let me explain to you why we don't like nice guys. We like kind guys. Here's why. Nice guys are only nice until they don't get their way. Hello, somebody. Nice guys are only nice until they don't get their way. It's not even about being a bad boy. This is about men come across as nice until they don't get what they want. So women like kind guys, we don't like nice guys, okay? I was reading, um, a post maybe about a month or two ago, and I commented on it. It was a guy, he wrote into an advice column and he said that he was going to stop walking his friend to her dorm at night because she rejected him. Okay, and so my comment was, he was never her friend. He said, I'm a nice guy. Anytime they start off with a nice guy, run. Kind is totally different. So he was getting ready, he stopped walking her to her dorm at night because she wasn't romantically interested in him. So she just— he just stopped walking her at night. Is that a kind person, or is that someone that hides behind being nice to try to get what it is that they want? Hmm. So we don't like nice guys. We don't like nice guys finish last. Yeah, because you're faking. You're faking being nice. If you ever want to know if a so-called nice guy is really nice, don't give what he wants. Okay, Antonio say nice guys can be alphas. You know, nice guys can be anybody that claims that they're nice. But genuinely, the reason why most women do not like nice guys, fellas, is because you're only nice until you don't get what you want, okay? When it's not Burger King, um, for you. Fellas, if you have a question, make sure you head over to thefeminineear.com and, um, You can ask your question live. Like I said, I gotta— I got a lot of questions. I got a lot of— Miss April, I can't wait to come on because I gotta— I got questions to ask. But y'all, y'all scared. It's all right, we're gonna do this every week. Only week we're not gonna be here is November 5th because that is election night, and y'all, we not gonna be here. Other than that, we will be here every Tuesday at 9 PM Eastern Standard Time. So I'm gonna let y'all— I'm gonna give y'all a pass you know, this week for all of you I'm calling in. I'm calling in because y'all definitely gave a whole list of, uh, uh, questions, sent over a whole list of questions after I had to sift through all the questions from the women, even though it clearly said this is not for the ladies. Okay, let's see what else do I have. Who else do I have here? And if you are a guy in the chat and you want to just type your question You can do that too. All right, let's see.

Mm.

You know what? This is the perfect time. This is a perfect time to segue into what I call dropping the handkerchief drop. What the handkerchief drop is, fellas, what I realize is a lot of you do not know when a woman is flirting with you. And it's the proverbial, um, thank you so much, it's the proverbial, um, dropping the handkerchiefs flirting with you, okay? And a lot of men, what I realize, don't know when someone is trying to get their attention. I don't know where y'all head be and what y'all got, you guys don't see. But what I've done is I've taken a couple of scenarios to try to help you figure out when a woman is actually trying to hit on you and it's going, um, right over your head. Now some women are just straightforward, straight, just real straightforward, aren't they, Blake? Uh-huh. So Blake, my videographer, uh, we were in, uh, New York and then we were in DC. Now Blake is new to the team. Now I told Blake, now, um, dealing, working with us, I said, are you— one of the questions I had to ask is are you comfortable working around a lot of Black people? And he said, yeah. He said, well, once he said he went to a Black church, I said, okay, Blake, if you had the Black church experience, you all right with me. Well, some women are just forward. And when I tell you, when we went to the New York stop— for those of you that don't know, I'm on tour with Dr. Bobby and Stephan Speaks, the Time for Change tour. I will, um, be on the last tour stop. We were just in DC. I did New York, I'm doing Atlanta, and I'm releasing a new book called, um, Her Invisible Value: What Feminine Women Bring to the Table on the 2nd. Um, but when we took Blake with us to New York— now this is what you don't do, but actually this one was, was okay. Uh, I won't, I won't— I don't know, it was forward, but I didn't hear her say it. He just told me that she said it. The lady says 'Um, what are you— what are you doing?' How did she say it? Oh yeah, 'What are your plans for the rest of the night?' Blake said, 'Up, going to the hotel room and FaceTiming my girlfriend.' And when we, um, were in DC— we were in DC this past weekend— another one walks by him and says What did she say, Blake? She said something. What did she say? That's a—

that's a—

that's a fine piece of ass. That's not the way, ladies. And I'm like, don't scare him away, people. I said, did she say that to you? He's like, uh, yeah. That's a nice piece of ass. I said, oh, okay. And then the way that y'all get on my security and driver and y'all be— I babysit him, I keep him company. That's not what I'm talking about. That's not— that's what I'm not— what I'm talking about now. That's, that's forward. They will understand and know exactly what you mean when you say things like that. I'm talking about fellas when you don't know. Let me— guys, let you— ladies and gentlemen, let me know how many people we have on the live because I, I don't know where to look. I'm still learning this whole system. Let me know how many people we have on the live. So here's scenario 1, um, if you're a guy and you're out with a group of friends and one woman keeps, uh— wait, wait, hold on, I'm sorry, I'm going— I'm moving too fast. Uh, Candace said, my man Blake. Candace, they are on him. I'm like, I'm like, Lord have mercy. I, I said, y'all, y'all better leave him alone. But doesn't Blake have a girlfriend? Hey girl, ain't that what I just said? This is why I don't talk to the women, because y'all don't freaking listen. I clearly just said the girl asked Blake what was he doing later on night, and he said, I'm going to FaceTime my girlfriend. This is why I'm not talking to y'all no more. Anywho, I can't. See, see, I'm not doing that. I'm not, I'm not doing that. I'm not doing that. Uh, Blake is tall and cute. Somebody wants to suck you. He's turning red, y'all. Okay, fellas, this is how you know a little bit, uh, if a woman is flirting with you. Okay, and she's dropping the handkerchief, but she's not being bold. Okay, explain what dropping the handkerchief means, which I just did. Um, so imagine that you're out and a woman keeps giving you the eye and she's touching your arm, and you really can't tell if she's being friendly or if she is just a touchy-feely kind. I'm a touchy-feely kind, and it doesn't always mean that I am flirting, right? And so I've been accused of, um I've been accused of that, but it doesn't really mean anything. If you want to know if it means something, if I am trying to get your attention, you got to pay attention to a woman's— how she's touching you. Also, is she constantly making eye contact with you? Because sometimes y'all just, y'all just look and you'll just smile back. No, she's trying to get you to bring it on over because you guys say you want to lead, so we want you to lead. So dropping the handkerchief means she's simply giving you the eye. She's smiling, she's laughing at your little jokes that are not funny at all. Mm-hmm. She can have that witty banter with you, but it's all about knowing how to pay attention to the subtle movements, right? I have another one where One guy, he asked, how do I know a woman is interested at the gym? I— there's this lady at the gym, but I don't know how to approach her because women say they don't want to be approached at the gym. Fellas, here's the thing. Women that give you the stank face at the gym, that don't want to be approached at the gym, just leave them the hell alone. Just leave them alone. Because here's the thing, women like to decide when is— when you can talk to them and when you can't. It's crazy to me that single women will try and tell you when you can and when you cannot talk to them. Don't talk to me while I'm out in the grocery store with my kid. Well, hell, you may never meet him again. Leave him alone. Now, if you want to see if she's interested, once again, is she watching you? Is she smiling at you? This whole gym crush thing, it takes you 6 months to talk to your gym crush. I'm like, everybody want to be grown until it's time. Okay, everybody wants to be grown until it's time. Stop just looking at people and, and, and waving. No, go over there and open your mouth. So if you see a woman at the gym and you can feel that she is like kind of giving you the okay to come over, go over there. And what you could do is you could say something like I noticed you were lifting this. You know, I found— I have a better way that you can do that. Find something in common. Or you tell her she did good today. Like, this was— you did good. I see you. Don't make it sexual. You don't have to make it sexual. Okay? You don't have to make it sexual. But at the end of the day, go over there and say something. All right, fellas, if you have a question, call in. Click the button, click the link on the screen and call in. Y'all shy shy, but it's okay though because— wait a minute, that's what I don't understand. And how y'all been shy but yet y'all always want a woman like You now you want to, you want to get closed mouth. Like, I got all of these messages that I had to print out and go through now, but now everybody want to be, want to be scared. What, what's, what's that? What, what's— I'm not, ladies. That just shows you exactly how the power that we have, but that's another conversation. All right, let's get back into these questions. Let's see, let's see, what do I have here? Alex, who was 32, says, hey Miss Lady, I love your lives, I love your content, and I had to ask this question. I've been dating this woman for a year, but she seems really focused on her career. I'm all for her ambition, but it seems like she doesn't have time for us. How do I balance supporting her goals while not feeling neglected? Oh, this is a good one, Alex. See, I put it like this: if you've had the conversation, if you've had the conversation and things haven't changed, find somebody that has the time for you. Like, I just really believe that we try to make people be something that they're not. I really think, I really believe that like there's other people out there that are more in alignment. And I get it, nobody wants to start over. Nobody wants to freaking start over. It's like, I done gave your behind a whole year and all I need you to do is make this one tweak. But remember, it goes back to what I said earlier. The 80/20 rule is not really the 80/20 rule that people say. Like, for those of you that came in late, I explained the 80/20 rule my way. The 80/20 rule, the April Mason philosophy way, is if a person has 80% of what you want but your needs are in the 20%, you need to let them be. Okay. You need to actually let them be, because the 80/20 rule is all about core needs, okay? That's what the 80/20 rule is all about versus the wants. All right, let's see. Okay, let me see, am I doing this right? Hold on. Am I clicking on the right thing to add him? It's right here. It's this one. Okay. Mm-hmm. Oh, right here. Right here. There we go. Well, hello, my love. You have to unmute yourself.

There we go.

Hey, Mike, how are you, dear?

I just wanted to make sure your technology was working correctly. You were saying the men were not calling in, so I was like, let me just double-check to make sure she had the thing open.

Yes, I do. But you know what, the men, they were all excited about calling in. You know, you know what you guys do until and when it's time, you don't do what you're supposed to do. But we had a whole lot of questions that people sent me in my DMs. We got some questions on the website. I got some questions in my email. And like I told the lady, stop sending me questions because I'm not answering them. This is not about you.

So April, you know, uh You said something tonight, like I've been getting delivered a little bit over here. You've been preaching a little bit.

Oh, by the way, let me just say this: Candace is single. Come on, don't he look good? He 50, y'all. Don't he look good? Single, no kids. He's been married. Like, I'm only telling everybody your business.

Hey, so you said something tonight.

Yes.

Um, So you was talking about the nice, the nice guy versus the kind guy, and, uh, that was good. Like, that was really good.

April Mason, thank you. She know her stuff.

Uh, a friend of mine messaged me, and a lot of my friends are watching this, and the, the statement came up as far as data and dating, right? Data and dating. And I think sometimes women don't understand that the data that you're giving out, especially on social media, on especially how you move, you're allowing a man to date you because you're giving him data way before he gets the opportunity to physically date you, you understand what I mean? So it's almost like based on how I see a woman is moving, she's giving me data already before I step into her presence. Can you talk about that a little bit? Because I don't think women realize that. Now this is just me, April. Okay, this is just Kantis. Okay, this is not— this is not part of the Feminine Air Show.

No, let me tell everybody who you are. For everybody want to know who Kantis is, Kantis is my business coach. He's responsible for setting up this beautiful set. I asked him, I said, what would it take for you to come to Ohio? Because for those of you that don't know, I left Atlanta after 20 years, um, last year, and I moved to Ohio and opened up a restaurant. And between this and that, these are two— my two babies right now. Kantis came out to, um, to Ohio to set up this set. So he is responsible for all of my April Mason everything right now. All right, so that's who he is. Somebody said it's 36 too young for him.

April, you know we're gonna have this conversation.

No, no, no, no, no, I'm just reading the doggone comments, huh? I'm just reading the comments.

What she look like, April? You know, I sent everybody your way. I sent everybody your way.

I can't tell you, you know, I don't have my glasses on and my contacts is barely working. Okay, I can't see.

All right, April, so this is a man's show, right? I'm gonna let— I'm gonna get all the guys warmed up a little bit. Maybe they just need somebody to come in as a, um, a warm-up guy.

Okay.

All right, so this is my Facebook, right?

Yeah. Mm-hmm.

I can do it on Instagram. And, and again, April, this is when we talking about data and dating going together, right?

Mm-hmm.

So I can go through, I can go through my Facebook stories and how come I always see all the way through my Facebook stories, April? I'm seeing the same type of selfies, the same type of cleavage. I know how many tattoos on your body before.

Why?

I don't know if women— again, this is Kantis, I'm not speaking for another dude, maybe the guys can chime in. I think a lot of times women show desperation and they show they want attention based on their pictures and things they post on social media. And a lot of times when a woman posts too many pictures, it doesn't intrigue a man to want to get to know her because it's like, we don't seen everything.

Mm-hmm.

And because you're showing everything on social media, you're not only showing it to me, but you're showing it to all the other guys. And actually now you're falling in love with these likes and approvals, but you actually still home by yourself. And I think as a man, women have to be cautious of the data that they put on social media. You know, the data that they put on social media. And, uh, can you just speak to that for a minute? Because I just know I'm not, I'm not saying that every man— well, I can say this, I, I can stand on this. Most of my guys in the chat, let me know, guys, does it feel like soft porn on your newsfeed and in your stories? I'm just looking at the message, guys. Don't leave me out here like this. Soft porn because women are constantly the right angles. You know, you'll do that angle where you hiding them biscuits. Dang, April, you shouldn't have got me on here. You know about them biscuits, right?

I do.

You know the angles, they hide— they, they get the angle right to hide the biscuits. And then when you meet a man in person, we see the biscuits. Or you use all the filters, and then when in person, it is a letdown. So can you talk about the data that you're giving on social? And a lot of times, men, we're dating you by the data that you're putting out already. So we, we don't even have to go spend time with you to say, hey, are you available on Saturday at 7 PM?

No.

Okay, Reverend, because I've seen the data that you put forth Monday, Tuesday, when— oh, April. I'm sorry, let me just vent for a second.

This is the feminine era where men are seen, heard, and understood. Go ahead, my love.

Why are, why are women on the hookah so much, April? Why are women— and maybe, maybe, April, this is not the women on, on this chat, maybe that's another type of woman, right? But you're Elder Mason right now, okay? Elder Mason.

Yeah, yeah. Can you talk about it?

I'm on here like The auntie, the drinking, the hookah, the, the filters, the showing every parts of your body. And it's like a man has nothing to be intrigued about because of what they're showing. I'm done.

You done, my love?

I think I'm done. I got it off my chest.

Okay, so I'm kind though.

I'm kind.

Okay. Yes, I wouldn't call you a nice guy. You were definitely a kind and generous man, I will say that. So this is what I would say. Let me, let me give a breakdown just a little bit, fellas. Let me give you a little breakdown. Oh, wonderful, now the fellas want to come into the chat room. See, it just took you having to come on in here to talk, so now we got two more in here. So let me give you a breakdown, fellas, and this is not making an excuse or anything like that, but I want to give you a better understanding of what's going on right now. We're living in a time where Women are rebelling and pushing back, okay? And this is what I mean. For centuries, women have been told what to do and how to do it. Everything that— how a woman shows up in the world, her modesty, what she can wear, what she can't wear, what she can say, what she can't say— was all given to us by men, okay? And I've said this before, If you look at it from religion to government to social norms, all of our social norms, for the most part, I would say if not all, were given to us by men. Whether if it was religion— well, man wrote the Bible or the Quran. Yeah, but they say they got it from what? A deity that they call what? A man. So everything about us as women, what we should show, what we shouldn't show, All that comes from y'all, because guess what? We didn't have any power or say-so because we were seen as less than. So what's happened, and with this shift in dynamic and what you're seeing, is rebellion. And honestly, here's the thing. Now let me get it— let me— don't get it twisted. I don't have a problem with the rebellion. See, let me explain this. No, let me, let me, let me explain why I don't. Let me explain why I don't have a problem with the rebellion. I don't have a problem for the rebellion because women can do what the crap we want to do, right? This is where it becomes a problem for the women. The women want to do what they want to do but still have the male gaze the way they want to have it. That's the bigger problem. So you can't— you got to understand, first of all, that we live in a time where women have been pushing back. Somebody said, I disagree. I didn't ask you, but it's okay, it's okay. Huh?

I disagree too.

I don't— it doesn't matter. I mean, it doesn't matter because you got to understand I'm, I'm not here to ask you to agree to disagree. I'm giving you the history on how women got to where we are.

Okay, okay, all right.

Everything that you named about what you don't like was given to us not to do by, by people with penises. That's my point. So because of this, we are— we are living in a time where women are actually pushing back. I'm not saying it's right or wrong. I'm saying I understand the rebellion. And number two, the problem comes in when women want to do what they want to do and still have a certain level of respect and the male gaze. That's what I'm talking— yes, Charlie, I'm giving the science of it. Thank you, Charlie. I'm giving you the science of how. Now, my belief is I'm one of those people— for those of you that are new to me, I'm wonder— I'm one of those people that can explain both sides. And still be in the middle. That's why I can talk to men, and that's why I can talk to women. I'm not biased, which is why I've always had an audience of men that were like, I love the fact that you don't just take our side. I can completely break something down to you and, oh, break something down to you, and whether I agree with it or not, I still can understand it. Okay, she sees some— Richie's pushing back by exposing all that. What I'm trying to tell you, Richie, is it was men who told us that we shouldn't expose all that. That's my point. So I'm not saying it's right or wrong, I'm just giving you the understanding that it was the Bible that told women that they have to be modest. It was, it was the religion that said that. It was men that said, because I cannot have de-discipline, you have to cover up because of my lack of discipline. Men told us that. Now, I'm not saying that if you want a man that you don't have to have a certain, several, certain level of order, but I'm giving you how women got to where they are. Us showing— the fact that someone said showing all of that, who said us showing that was wrong? Y'all can say God. Well, God is still viewed as what? A man. Now what's happening and what we feel, what we're seeing right now is a huge pushback from women for years and years and years and years and years of oppression. What women just don't understand is, and this is what I have taught my women for years, The patriarchy is never changing. But if you want a man, there's a certain level of patriarchy you gonna just have to deal with, because patriarchy is what created the standard for what women should be. Because everything that you're saying, my love, is— comes from the mouth or a deity that is a man, right? But the problem that we see is that because it's such a strong foundational structure in the patriarchy that has been set. Girl, stop trying to fight up against it. Understand what you're dealing with. And I'm just one of those people that I understand what I'm dealing with. And I have taught my women for years, stop trying to fight the patriarchy because— and do what you want to do, because the very type of man that you say you want, especially the women that scream, I want the— I want a high-value 6 figure, man, I want this. That comes with patriarchy, baby, and it's just what it is. I'm just in more of an accepting of what a thing is versus trying to change what a thing is. So everything you listed on your list, why is it wrong? You said it was wrong.

That's April. I'm gonna give you a hand clap. Press the little hand clap button. Let me see a little hand clap sound. That's for you, the applause. There you go, there you go.

So, so like I said, I'm not saying it's right or wrong and yes or no. I'm just wanting to give the background, the background on why we see so much right now. Because imagine someone telling you all your life, from generation to generation, you know, that you're, you're not good enough to— your second nature, you, you can't have a phone line. I was doing my research I was doing my research, and there was a time up until 1978 that in some parts of the United States, a woman couldn't even get a phone line without her father, brother, or husband's approval or co-signing. A woman could not even get a business loan, buy a house— a single woman— up until the 1970s. So my point in saying this, um, is how is it that we got these rules of what a woman should be and what she shouldn't be? I believe, and this is just me, and y'all know I love men. But due to a man's lack of discipline in his eye gate and his pee-pee gate, we were used as scapegoats to say, hey, you can't wear that. Think about it, Kantis. When a woman gets, as they say, graped, right? Y'all know what I'm talking about. The first thing we hear men say is, what was she wearing? She asked for it because of what she was wearing. Where did all of this stem from? It wasn't us women because we didn't have any rights. We couldn't, we couldn't do anything, right? So it wasn't us. Then, you know, for those of my Bible thumpers that, that are around here, well, when the woman was caught in adultery, they wanted to stone her, not him. So we have to think about how we got to where we are and the oppression of women. That's the thing, nobody wants to talk about the oppression of women. Although this is about men, I want you guys to understand why women walk around and do some of the things that they do now. Am I saying it's right? Am I saying it's wrong? Or am I saying that I understand it? But what women, I believe, have to understand is the type of man that you want showing, doing everything that you said, according to you, it doesn't fly. So it's not that they can't do it. It's based upon what you want, you have to fall in line. That's more so what it is.

Yeah, so I get it. So man caused the rebellion, okay? So we're, we're seeing, experiencing that rebellion now, but the balance comes with women understanding men and what a man actually likes and values. And are you saying that the women have— they have to get in line?

Well, what I'm saying is, if that's what you want, it's— it's— you know what, Candace, it's like this. If I— you know what, something— I like a job as a doctor, my resume needs to be in alignment with what it is that I say that I want.

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Because I'm not all men, because some men, like, they love that. Well, they may love it, but they may not wife it.

Well, see, the thing is, there's a difference between wifing something. Put it like this, Ken, I feel like a lot of men have the Madonna whore complex. And the Madonna whore complex is simply— y'all say you want to freak it, a lady in the sheets, and a lady in the streets, and a freak in the sheets, right? However, let her be a little too freaky. The Madonna whore syndrome is pretty much a man that wants to have all of his sexual fantasies um, uh, he wants to live them out, just not with the woman, the flower that he married or that he's with. I don't want to view her in that manner, right? But then you say, I want her to be this. Well, for some reason, men don't seem to think that women have, um, high sexual, um, desires. Like, we have a— we have a part of our body that you guys don't have that was strictly meant for pleasure. Y'all don't have a part on your body that has one thing, one, one use for it, and one use for it only. We do. Okay, so I think that— I believe that a lot of men, they want the freaky stuff, you know, but because of the wiring of— she can't be all out there like that, you know. Who— where you learn this from? Who you been Women have sexual desires as well. That's why studies show between 40 and 60% of women have never had an orgasm before. Why do you think that is? And we have one part of our body that is, um, specifically for us having an orgasm, but most women have not because y'all don't always think that, hey, we want sex just as much, if not more, than you do, especially when you get to that 45 and over.

Yeah, I think this is good, April, because, you know, somebody— I can say—

wait, hold on, somebody, somebody said, I think saying men cause the rebellion is an easy way for women to excuse to dress like whores. But who made it— who made dressing a certain way a whore? Men did. That's my whole point. That— I'm gonna stop answering questions from women. That's my whole point. The whole, the whole, um concept of a whore was not created by women. It was created by men. That— and that's the deconstruction that we do. We have to have in order to be able to have these conversations, because we have to look at the origin, we have to look at the root. And then what's happened is men did that. Men, men put everything in place, and then you get women who feed into that level of patriarchy, just like the men. So where did this stuff— where was this stuff established? It was established through the men because women had no rights to establish anything. So what's a whore? Who established a whore? Who decided that if I sleep with you and I, uh, do whatever I want to do with you, that you're nasty and you're no good? Women wasn't doing that to other women. It was men from way back when. I'm not saying that, um, men are to blame for everything, but what I am saying is let's look at the history. And I'm a very, very well-studied and well-versed, um, woman. But at the end of the day, um, it's understanding where the, the root of where these things came from. Calvin said, so how can we be, be fixed? Here's the thing, Calvin, it's It's not about this. Here's a wonderful thing. It's not about fixing. It's about allowing people to be who they are and you finding someone that's in alignment with your values, standards, and, um, the lifestyle that you want to live. What we have to do is stop trying to make people something that they're not. I had a guy tell me, and he said something to me and it made me think. We were talking about whores one day. This is 2022. He says 'April Holes are needed.' And I said, 'What you mean?' He said, 'Some women were birthed on this planet to be just that.' I said, 'You think so?' He said, 'Yeah.' He said, 'We have to allow people to be what they are.' And I said, 'That's interesting.' And it caused me to think. It caused me to think and, and, and caused me to do more research on the whole topic of where this all stemmed from. But at the end of the day, I believe that We have to allow people to be what they are, and, and we have to be truthful about what we are. See, what's happening is we have people trying to make others be something instead of going to get people that are in alignment with them. This brings me to this, fellas. This is something that you really got to understand. Stop picking women that are not picking you and then trying to drag them down, or These women only want men with money. These women— well, go get a woman that's okay with exactly where you are. Why is that so hard? Okay, it's not hard to go get someone that's on your level, but the problem becomes you don't think you're on the same level as that woman. You think you're above her. So when you try to go to another league, you don't qualify up there. Because you've overinflated your sense of self. And just stick— and I've told women the same thing— stick with people who want you. Oh, right. So when, when you say, why, how did Calvin— when you ask, why do, why did we change it? You don't try to change people. What you do is you find somebody that's in alignment with your lifestyle, beliefs, and your values. That's really it. Because the more you keep trying to change people is you're trying to say that you have the ability to control someone else, and we don't. And I believe that men and women would do better if they just allow people to be who they are. And you figure out what it is that's within you that causes you to keep trying to deal with people that you have to change.

That's good, that's good. April, I appreciate you.

You're welcome, my love.

All right, we got more guys.

Yes.

Yeah, so you can put me back in the waiting room and bring on— bring on Johnny or Dante or Calvin or Bobby or— okay, Smith or Rallo.

All right, thank you, my love.

Do me a favor, man. Hey, in the chat box, y'all show April some love. Just type April in the chat box. Just show April some love for doing this for men. Just a lot of Aprils. Type Aprils in the chat.

Thank you so much. Hey, thank you so much.

Keep up the good work.

All right, my love. Let's see who else do we have. Oops, I hit the wrong button. Sorry, y'all. So we have— okay, we have somebody in here. Let's see, uh, you not, uh, the Mizzy. I don't see your face, baby. You got to show your face if you want to come on with us. Um, let's see, we have— who else we have in here? Okay, there we go. Um, are y'all enjoying the show so far? Can you unmute yourself, my love? Can't hear you. Okay, there we go, there we go.

I thought I was gonna miss you again.

No, come on in here.

Over at the, uh, Christmas, uh, over at the Christmas Cafe.

You did what now?

Say that I tried to catch you over at the Christmas Cafe.

Oh, you came to the restaurant?

Thank you, thank you for passing off this information about femininity about women's feminine energy, and I realized that's something I need in my life. But, but, okay, not right now.

Okay, why not right now?

I just want to do me.

Okay, why not? Right, come talk to me. Why not right now?

Uh, I've been in relationships where I have done a lot of sacrificing and put me aside.

Okay, understood.

And, uh, it's time for me to do me.

So tell me what that looks like.

Well, uh, I'm doing some traveling.

Okay.

Uh, right after— well, I ain't gonna say that part, but yeah, Cancún, uh, traveling with some family, um, just getting out and enjoying me. And not, not pressed to meet anybody.

But what, what if she just happens to show up?

If she happens to show up, hopefully she'll be like an April Mason, because I need one of those April Masons in my life.

Okay, okay, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on now, hold on now, hold on now, hold on. So, so you know what, you— so what is an April Mason? What, what is your, um, your view of, and of me, and why does she have to have whatever this thing is that you say?

That subtlety, that, that, that kind of energy that makes me want to be a better person, makes me want to be a better man, makes me want to make your life enjoyable.

Okay.

Um, the kind that you don't really have to ask me for anything, you know.

Um, Is that why you came up to the cafe, to get some of that energy? Is that what you came up to the restaurant?

Oh yeah, oh heck yeah, heck yeah. Um, but okay, it was, it was also just to, just to get that vibe, and I wanted to, I wanted to see what kind of treats y'all had.

Oh yeah, we got some good stuff too. We, we have the best milkshakes around, I'm just saying. So next time you come back, you gotta, you gotta get, uh, either Rudolph's Red Velvet Or you gotta get, um, Donner's, uh, Donner's Chocolate Thunder. Some of our best ones.

Chocolate Thunder. I might go for that chocolate.

Okay, okay.

Well, yeah, thank you, thank you very much. You made me see something that I didn't know was out there.

You know what, I am so glad to hear that. My thing is, what's your first name? Because you said it just said The Mizzy. What's— what should we call you?

The Mizzy. The window.

Window. So here's the thing, Wendell, I want people to believe in love again. I really want to see men and women get excited to go out on dates. I want to see like the man step up and ask her out on date, make plans. Like, one of the sexiest things men don't realize that we as women see as sexy is consistency. Oh my God, when I tell you, it's not even about spending any money. It's about being consistent in your communication, being consistent in how you show up, your patterns, your efforts, your actions, your words. It all, it all lines up. And the thing is, a lot of men feel like unless he makes X amount of dollars, none of that matters. Well, what they don't understand is that a lot of the times gets you in the door. That can sit— when I tell you consistency is sexy, you know, and being able to make plans, you know, to say, hey, Uh, well, hey baby, Friday night, we, you know, we got date night. That type of thing, it is a beautiful thing for women, and it brings us all the way down. It's like when men say, where's the submission? Where's the consistency? Consistency brings down a woman's walls, and it makes us be more free with you. But the moment your words are not lining up, it's like, oh, we go back in our shell, and then all of a sudden the wall comes up because Let me tell you fellas something. We as women, and it's, it's unbeknownst to us that we're doing it, let me say that, but we test you. We test you. Not is he gonna give us some money, is he gonna buy— it's not that. That's not what I'm talking about, Wendell. I'm talking about—

oh, I know that. I know, I know about the test.

Yes, and it could be something as simple as, um, we tell you about a problem And then if we hear you say, you know, you good at handling things, I'm sure you're gonna figure it out, immediately block. There's an energy block that goes up, right? Um, and it's not us trying to— I believe it's more primal is what it is. It's more primal because it's, it's kind of like when you guys see us, um, and you see the hips or whatnot, you think about childbearing hips and all that. That's a primal thing for you. It's not like on the forefront of your mind. It's just, I'm drawn to hips, I'm drawn— whatever that thing is, that, that fertility in a woman, you're just naturally drawn to it. For us, it's the same thing. And I believe that if men understood that— okay, yeah. So Richie said love is overrated, respect is paramount. Uh, Richie, that's because you haven't loved— been loved properly, my love.

Yeah, I disagree too. Yeah.

Yeah, you haven't been loved properly. That's why you here, my love. And, and as we go on, you know, through the weeks, we gonna get you love right, Richie, because love is not overrated. Because who wants somebody to just respect them and not love them? I respect you, but I don't like you. I resp— I can respect you and not like you. I, I don't like you. I definitely respect her, huh?

Feel too much like you in school.

Yeah, you know, it's like, uh, I— if you— if you know what I want you fellas to be okay with, I want the fellas to be okay with saying, I want both. Absolutely. I want both. I want to be loved and respected. I don't want to just— a woman to respect me. Because guess what? How do men gain respect from women? Do you know?

Well, you just said, uh, one is consistency. Um, I would imagine loyalty. Um, reliable. Be a reliable man.

Those are the things that make us love you. But if you only want respect from us— and I don't think men understand that— if you only are asking for respect, you only get respect by basically what you can do and what you can provide. I respect him for providing. I don't love him, though, but I got to respect that he take care of his family. See, the things that you name, those are the things that pull on the heartstrings. But if you only want respect, we're only going to respect you by what you can produce. That's why I say it's best to ask for both and not just one, because we've seen men throughout the decades that got respect for taking care of their families, but they, they had outside families and they had outside affairs. But at least I took care of the family. That's where their respect came from. At least I took care of my family. Yeah, I might have stepped out, but at least I did this, at least I did that, based upon what he was actually doing. And the woman stayed. And, you know, I respect him for taking care of his family, but I don't love him. So fellas, be okay with wanting both. Be okay with understanding that you deserve both, you know, because a lot of men get so caught up in, you only want me for what I can do. Well, hell, that's all you presenting. If all you're presenting is what you can do, why should I love you? Yeah, if you're leading with your wallet, if you're leading with your ability to provide Um, and not realizing that there's some women, we have provision and we have the things. What can you give us that money can't buy? That's what I really want men to really think about tonight. What can you give a woman that she can't— that she can't buy, that money can't buy?

I think we're, uh, I think we get the wrong idea because a lot of what's out there is just the opposite. A lot of what's out there, um, you hear women saying over and over again, uh, that they want that man that can provide, they want that man that can do this and that monetarily, financially. Um, so guys kind of like get stuck on that message.

You're right. You know what, but you know what, let me explain. I'm glad you said that, fellas. Let me clear this up for you right now with this whole six-figure provision, provision, provision He got to make six figure. Let me help you with that. Let me decipher what that actually means. Now, there's a demographic of women. It don't mean that. I, when I talk to my audience, I talk to my audience from the average salaried American man and woman. The average man in America doesn't even make $65,000 a year. The average woman in America is somewhere $50,000, some depending on the demographic, but it's about $55,000, right? And that's not including a Black man. 21% of men in the United States make $100,000 a year. 8% of that number are Black men. So we're having all of these conversations about six figures, six figures, six figures, and provision, but we're not understanding that the average person is not making $100,000 a year. And secondly, A lot of the men that women want that are making that money, the women don't provide the feminine experience in order to get taken care of like that. So it— so they're just looking at their value based upon what they earn. What I say is, when you, when you are a man and you want a great woman, become useful outside of your wallet. Be useful. Be useful. Know how to fix something. Know how to solve problems. Understand that provision is just not monetary.

Okay, that's also— that's also one of those things that kind of like got us, uh, programmed the wrong way. We were told to not be a jack of all trades and a master of none. But that— there was some, some, some more words left out in that. Jack of all trades, master of none. But at least it is better than the master one. That's the real saying.

Okay, yeah, I just believe that men need to do that. Go ahead, I'm sorry.

Yeah, they're just saying that we thought, we thought that being a jack of all trades was not a good thing, but actually it was what we were recommended to do.

Yeah, you know, I say women sleep on blue-collar men. Like, blue-collar men is where it's at, honestly, um, because they know how to fix things, especially in this, um, in the time that we're in, you know, robots taking over things. And, um, I just believe that if we understood that men and women are both looking for the exact same thing it just comes across differently. And understand that there's so many people that are hurt that they're operating from their hurt. And Richie, I love you, and I see that you could— because based upon what you're saying, baby, I can tell you talking about your hurt. And I agree, men do want to be appreciated. Let me— fellas, let me tell you guys how we are raised, uh, when it comes to you guys. And ladies, I'll give y'all, you know, a little chat. You can get in the chat this time. How we're raised to view you as men is that you think with your other head and that you don't want commitment and that you're here to provide. This is what we are taught about you, that you guys don't have feelings. That's the number one thing that we are taught from a young age, that men do not have feelings. Okay, so being taught that you don't have feelings. And then on top of that, you guys don't show them unless you get angry a lot of the times, or if something is not going your way. Or men don't have feelings. I don't care, I don't care about these women until she cheats on you or she leaves you for someone else. Then those emotions come out, right? So this is how we're taught. So now what's happening, and this is just what I'm seeing, is that men are wanting to rise up in an area that they have not been taught for a long time. So think about it this way. For decades, we have had people fighting for the rights of women to be able to work and get paid and to have rights, right? Because back in the day, women were getting— not necessarily getting married, not all of them, but women were not necessarily getting married because they were in love. It was out of survival, right? So women were getting married, you know, I'm going to get me a man that's in the military because you got benefits, because women couldn't certain things women could not do. So we've had, we've had, um, decades of people fighting for our rights. What's happened is we haven't had decades of men being told it's okay to express their feelings and be more than just a paycheck. We're living in a time now— this is just me, this is not, this is not a study or anything, this is just me. We're living in a time in history for the first time, according to just me, that men are asked to do something other than provide a paycheck. The divorce rate is so high, and some friends of mine that are divorce attorneys have said why women are filing for divorce is based upon the fact that a lot of men are stuck in the traditional way of what they have been taught to do— just provide. There is no, um, emotional or mental evolution that's happening because they were taught to be one-track-minded and to, um, provide, provide, provide. So now when you have that, that provision only, what I'm finding is that a lot of men don't know where to go. Um, for instance, for you guys that, you know, that follow me on Instagram and social— at, uh, more so Instagram You know that I finally decided to say I'm ready to settle down. You know, I'm like, your girl didn't want to settle down. I've been married, I've had kids, I've done that. I've been living my life, right? But one of the things that I find, because I typically like older men, one of the things that I find is older men know how to take care of me financially, but they're dealing with a woman who does that for herself. But they don't know what to give me outside of a nice car, a big, beautiful home. I can take you to nice places. I can buy you nice clothes. I can buy you. A lot of things, right? Well, if I have those things, it's not that I don't appreciate you doing them for me, but what can you give me that money can't buy? That generation, the, um, I would say the 40 and over, 45 more so and over crowd of men, they're being asked to produce something that they haven't had people advocating for them to do for decades. Like, we have had people advocating for us to make more money and for us to have equal rights for decades. So now what we're seeing is this thing, right? Right. And we're seeing this influx of older women dating younger men and younger men really wanting younger women— I mean, older women. And I've gone out with some younger— some, some— I done played in the kiddie pool a little bit. And one of the things that I noticed over in the kiddie pool is they came up— they come up in a time where being vulnerable and being able to express themselves and being able to feel is okay. Whereas the older gentlemen, they still tend to struggle. Not all of them, I'm not saying all of them, but this is what we're seeing. So we see an influx of women filing for divorce over— it's a lot of it's not even over money, it's over the evolution that's happening. And so when I started to realize what women were asking for, it wasn't necessarily money because You get you a woman that you can tap into who she is from an emotional standpoint. Now, I'll say this, I don't expect you guys to be emotional like a romance novel, because at the end of the day, women write the romance novels. So you guys are not going to be this fantasy, and you guys are not going to totally be all, um, emotional and in tune like us. However, I don't think women understand that we lead you to the emotions. We lead you to spirituality, a deeper level of spirituality, because our femininity is connected to that. And our femininity helps you evolve. Our femininity, our spirituality, our sensuality, and our wisdom is what helps you get to that place that women feel like he should be there already. And in my opinion, this is not philosophy or anything like that. It's more so I just believe that women don't understand just how much of the power that we have, and that you guys— and I mean, how you men actually evolved. We evolved through us. And I believe— now, this is not our own hate on men, but I just believe that we've given y'all way more credit than we should have as far as what you should know. And a lot of you were not just there to talk. Go ahead.

There's, there's something you just mentioned though, that where you're talking about, uh, how you can lead us to this and that. What you do by being in your femininity, you, you allow us to drop our guard. We are— we have to go out and fend off the world. We have to, we have to protect you. We have to provide for you. We have to take all the slings and arrows from everybody else out there. So when, when we come home and you're gentle, you're receptive, you that one that we can get peace and comfort with, we can be, be open. We can be more, more of that, that feeling kind of person, that the emotional kind of person, or, you know, we could let our guard down. That's what we need. That's what we want.

I have a question.

As we get older, that's what more men are wanting. And yeah, I'm older than you, and, uh, okay, uh, yeah, I, I would know what to do.

Okay, okay, I would know what to do. I have a question for you. Look, um, I think it's just my perimenopause, y'all, make stuff slip my mind real fast. I gotta, I gotta get it out when I can, but I was getting ready to ask you a question, um Oh my God, Come Back to Me. It was a good one too.

I threw you off with that.

Uh, yeah, you did. You threw me off with it. You know, you was good. You were good with that one. But what was it? It was something I was getting ready to ask you. I totally forgot. Um, okay, I totally forgot. But I appreciate you coming on with me tonight. Thank you guys for making my debut feel warm and fuzzy.

Thank you so much for letting me get this opportunity too.

You're so welcome. You're so welcome. So that means you're gonna come back? You're gonna come back?

Oh yeah. Okay, I'm coming back.

You're gonna come back? All right. Thank you, my love. Have a wonderful night.

Thank you, you too. Good night.

Good night. Oh, that's— I gotta, I gotta push the button like that, y'all. We got another one. We're gonna take this last one and then I'm not gonna hold y'all for the evening. Let's see in the waiting room, who do we have in the waiting room? Let's see. Uh, can you turn your camera on, my love? Hey Chris, I didn't see you in here. Uh, turn your microphone on. Hello there, how are you?

Hello.

Hey, how are you?

Is that Miss— is that Miss Mason?

Yes, it is.

How are you, ma'am? I thought I was— I thought I was further down in the queue than, uh—

No, I'm— hold on, I'm trying to get— I'm trying to— I'm trying to put you— put you on. It's, um, this is coming up right here. Look, see, when I push the button, that comes up. Oh, that's right, that's right. It's my fault, it's my fault. There we go.

Hey, how are you?

I'm good, love. How are you?

I am, I am fantastic now that I'm seeing you.

Oh, okay, okay. So you knew— first of all, let me say, let me say this. You knew how to come on the live, would you know? Oh, you know I love my 49ers.

Yes, ma'am.

Yes, absolutely.

I'm, I'm a Niners fan as well. I think we discussed this when I came by, when I came by.

Oh, you mean when you came by the cafe and brought me some money? You talking about, and talking about to do whatever I wanted to do with it? You talking about that? I, I split it with my— I gave it as a tip to my employees.

Awesome, awesome, awesome. Fellas, ladies love money. They love our energy and our Yes, we do.

And I appreciate you.

Yes, ma'am.

And I've been trying—

I was trying to get to New York and Washington because I've been in Philly for so long just dealing with my, uh, with some, some things that I got. So on my way maybe back to Minnesota, I'll stop by and try out some of your food.

Oh yeah, we got some new stuff on the menu. Now ladies, I gotta say, the fellas will stop by. They will come and stop by the cafe to try, to try the food. I really appreciate it. And I appreciate all the ladies that— one lady recently, she drove from Canada, um, to come to the Christmas Cafe. So I appreciate you all, um, for coming by, especially my social media folks, because you don't have to give of your time, you know. You don't have to give not just your time, you don't have to come and patronize our business, right? And I love that. So thank you.

And so I have, I have a couple of questions. Okay, so I, I've been single 6 years, divorced. Um, I've never cheated on a woman. I ain't in a— I don't need sex. I don't need sex. I need sacred speech. Where are the women that understand sacred speech? And what I, what I mean by sacred speech is when, when all of us were conceived, there was a— before we had a language, we had a language. There was something I saw on the internet says that light happens when life happens. Okay, so let's just, let's just paint this picture of the sperm on its way to fertilize the egg. The egg is the largest cell in the woman. The sperm is the smallest cell in the man. So with the smallest of a man, a woman can multiply. Okay, where are the women that understand that language that, hey, I am going to make more of this man Also, was the sperm seeking out the woman, the woman's ovary, or was there a beacon of light pulling the sperm towards each other because they were already met? They already met and they were known to each other in another time and space. So I'm looking for that type of energy that lifts me up out of my seat and pulls me across the room where I cannot resist and I don't have any control over me engaging in conversation, releasing oxytocin, vasopressin, serotonin, and all that adrenaline stuff.

Okay, I hear you, and I have a question for you.

Yes, ma'am.

Are you that guy? Are you the guy that exudes all of that energy that you say you want for a woman to be drawn into you? Because here, this is what I find. It's typically not hard for us to get what we want when we are in alignment with it. And my reason why I'm saying this is, so when I spoke in DC this past weekend, it was about maybe 500 beautiful people there. I had really had good energy. And one of the things, um, that I asked the women, uh, when I walked in, uh, got on stage, I said, how many single women in here? And probably about 90% of the room raised their hand. And how many of you believe that, you know, they're good men in here? It's like, yeah, we— I do. I said, how many of y'all want somebody? I do. I said, then y'all the problem. Because I hadn't even been to DC. I had just got to DC and I was checking into the hotel, checking my staff into the hotel, and this man— the men were men in DC, right? So for me, it was more so knowing that when you are in alignment with something right? You start attracting it. And then I talk to them about alignment, and I use the analogy of intercourse. When you have an orgasm, you do so because your mind, body, and the action is in alignment. That's how you know that an orgasm is coming, correct? So with that, it made me, you know, think— and this is how I was able to explain it to them— that The only reason why we don't have what we want is we may not totally be in alignment with it the way that we think we are. I know I wasn't. I used to say some stuff, be like, yeah, eventually I'm gonna get married, eventually I'm just— yeah, I'm gonna do— I would say this, but my alignment was not with it. I wasn't making time the way that I needed to make time for everything that I was saying. I was not in alignment with it. So is it a possibility that this beautiful woman that you described with all of this fantastic juicy, just, just feminine energy that you describe, are you in alignment with her to draw her in? That's my question.

For all of the men?

No, for you.

Um, well, my question was to help the brothers out. Um, I—

no, listen what I'm saying. You said, where are the women that are like this? And my my question is whether it's for you or whether it's for— because you said you start off with, I've been single for 6 years, so I thought you were talking about you. So we can make it, we can make it in general. Are you in alignment with what you say it is that you actually want? Because if I want some peanut butter Captain Crunch, I can crave it all day. Yeah, that's my favorite cereal when I ate cereal. I could crave it all day, but unless I got myself up and went to Publix or Walmart or whatever store I went to to get it, I was just going to crave it, right? So my point is, everything that we want already exists. So if that's the case, why aren't we in alignment? I know why we aren't, but— and I'll explain it— but why do you think that people are having a hard time connecting even though they express their desires of what they want. Why do you think that is?

So I, I call it failed fairy tale syndrome. From the time when, uh, girls are, are young, they're taught to play house, to raise babies, to do all of these womanly things. And what are the boys doing? They're taught, uh, Rapunzel, throw down your hair, Romeo and Juliet. They're taught The Lady and the Tramp. They're taught Cinderella. And the boys are running around playing with balls. So we have a group of women that are expecting a man to know how to do all of the things that she's been preparing for, to receive his seed, to receive his, his brain, which is actually his, uh, semen, his brain fluid. She cannot become a helpmate if she does not have the proper brain fluid, or if he has nothing in his brain, she has nothing to contain or explain. So I think the fact is that we have a lot of men running around playing with baseballs football, basketball, soccer balls, and other balls. And that's the reason why we have such a big disconnect, is that the women are prepared. And the woman is the wisdom of God. She's always going to be more and better than a man. The men are running around thinking that we know what women want. And you have to talk to a woman. She's a crockpot. You got a slow cooker. You got to listen to her. She needs time. She needs attention. She needs affection. She needs intentionality, not just, uh, penality. So most men think it's about penetrating her, her physical body. You have to penetrate the mind and the soul, and that's how you get her body to come into oneness with you. And that's where submission comes through. Most men think submission is something that's automatic. Even if you go back to the Bible, it says submit ye one to another. So if she's better in the area, I submit to her. If I'm better than an area, she should submit to me. But you have to know what you're designed for. And I'll, I'll say this and I'll be quiet. I heard George Bloomer say this: submission means to go under, to support. So sub is floor, subfloor, subframe, subway. A mission is a purpose. So when you find the right person, you go up under a person's mission and you support where they are strong at and vice versa. I think that's the biggest issue of the battle of the sexes. Um, I actually said one time on one of your lives that I would literally come and work for you for this, for the wintertime, because I only have to maybe work about 5 months in Minnesota. So I've been out this way. So if a man's not willing to come and submit, I think that he should, uh, omit or remit. He should move out the way. And the other thing is, women, if you want to find an amazing man, go volunteer. Because if you have a passion and he has the passion, he may have the money, the time, and the interest in his actual community where he's volunteering there, and there's no pressure. So you can bond about a commonality. So if you're interested in public speaking or you want to help save the animals, try and meet a man there because he's probably— he has community, he has currency, He has capital and he has, he has character and he has clarity about what he is.

So I, you know, I like that. I like that. And I, I agree with that. And I'll add this to it. I believe the reason, um, we having this issue is because, in addition to what you said, is because people want what they want without changing their thinking and expectations and more beliefs. And what I mean by that is, for instance, any man that's on here— and thank you so much, fellas, for giving up your time tonight— any man that's on here that wants a relationship, if he's honest, if he's honest, if he wants a really relationship and he wants love and respect and all the wonderful things that come with it, right, he would literally have to change his belief system and mindset around women. See, what happens is when you have a particular belief system and a mindset around a thing, you will only experience what you believe. Hello, somebody. I don't think people want— really understand what that means. It's almost like people want others to come in and save them or show them something different from what they're used to, not realizing you don't even believe that exists. So why would it be drawn to you? And I don't believe people understand that part. It's like when women ask me, well, where are the good men at? Or where are the good men at? They ain't checking for you. And the reason why they're not checking for you, because energetically you don't even believe that good men actually exist. Energetically, you believe that I don't care how feminine I am, he's still gonna cheat. Energetically, you still are always looking for narcissism. You're always still looking for what, red flags? And even, um, bank tellers are not trained on counterfeit money, but you are so trained on what you look for. 5 ways to know he narcissist, 6 ways to see if he using toxic Masculinity, 4 ways to know, you know, if he's gaslighting you. You are a professor when it comes to what you don't want, and then you wonder why, why do I keep getting these type of people? Because your belief system and how you think will bring that in. When Wendell said trying to fix the family— what, trying to fix the family? Oh yes, I think I know what you're trying to say. But it's changing your belief system. So fellas, I challenge you as we get ready to close for the evening, I challenge you to be honest with yourself. When I'm on my Instagram Lives talking to the ladies, I make them write, I want a husband, because women feel like if I say I want a husband, I'm desperate. But the only one person that make you feel desperate for wanting a husband is another woman. Now it's not a man, right? So you're not— if you're not trying to get with them, we ain't worried about them. So I'm going to do you the same way that I do the women. Look at what you— your belief system is around women. Think about that. Look at what you believe. If you believe that women only want men that make six figures, if you believe that women don't want— only want average— don't want average men or, or average working men or just regular guys, if you believe that, um, women, whatever your thing is, don't want This is why you keep seeing it. You want to know why, in my opinion, these podcasts are so venomous and they are so just— and in my belief, they're, they're fear-mongering and constantly having conversations about the same thing that keeps triggering you. It's because it's easy to talk to you from your pain than it is for you to actually change. Pain pays the bills. A lot of these folks that y'all worried about— what these women say, the podcasters say they only want six figures. Let me help you. The only reason why these podcasters are making six figures is because they're monetizing your trauma. They're being able to trigger you. If it was not for that, they would be average individuals making an average income like every other average American anyway. So we got to get past what we're hearing, um, people say and, and things that— gotta stop also listening to the things that are not in alignment, fellas, with what it is that you want. There's a woman that want you. Just because she didn't want you when you were in school, you might have been boring. Let's get with it. Let's, let's be honest. She didn't want me back then. Well, you might have not had any conversation. You might not have, have grown into your attractiveness. And that's okay. Don't punish every other woman because some woman in the past rejected you for whatever her reason was. A lot of you don't understand that, um, you don't always show up as your best self. A lot of men don't have real personality. So is it that she didn't like you because she just didn't like you, or was it that you didn't have personality? You didn't have a mouthpiece, you didn't know how to communicate. Let's not put all of that, um, carry all of that throughout the years because of what somebody said. Some of you, it took you longer to grow into yourself, okay? Yes, Calvin, no confidence, right? So we hear men hide behind those things, but it's called self-development, just like women do. Well, he didn't want me because, oh, I lost the weight. Now, you know what I hate seeing on social media? I hate seeing, especially on TikTok, I hate seeing the girls that were, you know, a little chunkier, little BBWs, but then they go get the revenge body. Now he want me now. Now the man want me. Well, why do you just didn't do that? Like, why didn't you just do it for yourself? Like, it's like we have to understand people are attracted to certain things. If you are, you know, someone that you feel like you aren't as attractive there's still somebody that's gonna be attracted to you. Y'all just don't want them, okay? You just— that's not who you want. But all of a sudden you get rejected. Fellas, you guys do the same thing. You get rejected, all of a sudden now you in the gym. I'm going to get my money up. I make a lot of money now, right? So I should be able to have the baddest chick in the game. But guess what? You're a high earner, you're not high value. That's different. Because all you did was allow the rejection to cause you to spiral out of control, to say, I'm going to go get as much money as I can, I'm going to go get all of the assets so that I can go get the girl, because this girl rejected me back in the day and they didn't want me. So now I got muscles and I'm him. But you're still not high value because you did nothing with this, this, and your spirituality. So fellas, what you gonna do? Okay, what are you— what are you going to do? Are you still going to think that women don't want you? You keep running into women that don't want you and don't accept your $50,000, $60,000, $70,000 a year simply because of what you listen to and how you view yourself. It's just like the, the letter I read earlier, I believe was from James. He said every time he, you know, he got it, he gets— he got a divorce, but every woman that he meets, she keeps talking about her ex, and he feels like he's second best. That's because that's his view of himself, right? Well, thank you, Bryant, for joining me tonight. I appreciate you.

You're the best. Uh, today's my mom's birthday, but I had to come out. And sit and see what you're doing and support you on your first one.

So thank you. Tell her happy birthday.

I do appreciate you very much. Um, one of the things if I could share with the brothers is the power of life and death is in the tongue. Then it says, he who finds a wife finds a good thing. So women don't just feel words, they don't hear words, they feel words. So a man that knows how to use his mouth with the power of life and death in the tongue, eventually he'll have the wife that he wants. Because he sows into her soil and she has to bloom like a pretty flower. Bloom.

And we want to bloom. We want to bloom. We want to bloom. See you later, darling. Thank you. We want to bloom, fellas. We want to bloom. And I'm going to close out with this. If, fellas, if you've never heard this before, understand that regardless of what you see going on in the world right now Regardless of all the chatter and all the talk about decentering you and not caring about you, music being made about, you know, dogging you out and, and trick these dudes, and you know, you know, you know this what I'm talking about. Understand that the only reason these things are being said, they're being done, they're being created, is because women truly want you. We just want you to rise up. Women can't even stop talking about men, let alone leaving them alone, right? So I'm here, The Feminine Ear, to help you do just that, to help you get the love and respect that you want from a woman. Because you want that. You want a home. You want a family. You want someone that actually has your back. You want that. However, I wouldn't say that the pool is full of debris and all kind of other junk. I'll just say, until you become a different individual and make what I call an identity switch, you're going to always, always see the same thing and have the same experiences. So if you want something different, fellas, I challenge you to ask yourself, who do I need to become to get the type of woman that I want? Okay, Slim said that's no excuse to badmouth us. Slim, y'all bad mother about bad mother about badmouth us as well too. Hey, come get out your feelings, baby. Slim Daddy 9, get out your feelings. Get out your feelings because I'm sure you have badmouthed about a woman who did you wrong, and I'm sure you may have listened to content that badmouth women. So this is not about a pointing of the finger. That's another thing, fellas. This podcast is not about pointing the finger. This is about evolving. The one of the weakest things to me that I see in men is when, um, um, women do it too, women do it too. We're not talking about them. We're talking about you right now. We're talking about you taking ownership and, as you guys say, accountability for what it is that you want. You will never get access to the women that y'all cannot stop talking about until you decide to become a different type of man, until you decide to say, you know what, who I was back then, I'm not that man anymore. I want to be someone different. And not only am I going to go to therapy if I need it, but I'm going to go get a mentor. I'm going to go hang around men that have what it is that I want. And that can also help me evolve. I don't care if you're 18 or if you're 56, get around some people that, that are in alignment and have the things that you want. It's very important. So when you understand that you can gripe about women, you can say, oh, you know, she, she's a baby mama, or she just wants six figures, or she— whatever it is that you come up with That's all you are going to see in your reality, okay? That's all that you're going to see. If, if you don't make the change, stop complaining. Because guess what? Just like I don't advise women to deal with men that do not evolve, I don't advise you to deal with women that have not evolved or that are not on their journey to evolving. Okay, I don't advise men to deal with women that they have to keep trying to show them love and they keep resisting it. Walk away. Why she— why won't she just accept me? Because there's somebody else that will. We don't have time for that. Time is too short. And you guys do know that the average lifespan for a man is between the age of 74 and 76. So if you're at like 35, 36 years old, baby, You almost— you pretty much have your lifespan anyway. Do you have time for that? Okay, you know, um, some say heal yourself before you go into another relationship. I don't necessarily agree. I believe that none of us are 100% healed until we meet someone that can come in and show us something different. Should you be on your journey of, um, self-evaluation and finding out what your roadblocks are, finding out what your, your hurts and your wounds are. Yes, but I do not believe that you have to be healed because guess what? A lot of women that say be healed, most women are not, including myself. We're not healed from a lot of things. You want to know why? Because it takes you being the thing that we need that comes in to heal us. Even God uses people to heal other people. So none of us are healed. However, you should be on your journey of self-discovery and should know more about yourself, um, than you— than, um, than just going out getting from relationship to relationship. You should be doing that. But to be honest with you, none of us are healed. How do I know this? Because if you're not used to a good woman, it takes The love of a good woman. It takes a woman coming into your life and showing you that. You can read as many books, you can go to a thousand conferences, you can go to a therapist, but it doesn't matter. None of it matters. I tell my women all the time, I don't care if you buy every course that I have, every book that I've written, and you've been on every live or whatever else that I have, right? You will not know how this, this information has, um, affected your life until you're in a situation where you have to apply it. So we, we scream, heal, heal, heal, heal, heal, heal, not realizing if a woman isn't used to a good man showing up in her life, it's going to take some adjustment to even get used to him. If a man isn't used to a woman operating in her feminine at the core of what it is, it's going to take you some getting used to. You don't get used to this stuff by yourself. You don't get used to being treated well be on your healing journey for yourself. No, what you do is you gain boundaries, you gain perspective, you evolve, right? That's what happens. So we have to stop thinking that you have to be 100% perfect. And women are the ones that really think that, because women will take themselves off the market from you guys, fellas, um, and isolate themselves for years, whereas men typically Studies show that if a man gets a divorce, he's typically remarried within 2 years. Even whether he ain't take time to heal, he just knew he still needed a woman. And a lot of times it's women that come in that become that. Okay, so stop listening to people tell you, you got to be healed, I need a man that's healed. He's not gonna be healed until you come into the picture and show him something different. He does have to be on his journey of evolution, but he's not going to be healed just like we are. All right, did y'all enjoy the first episode of The Feminine Ear, where men are seen, heard, and understood? Let me know in the comment section if you guys enjoyed this. Um, someone said, this was a great episode, Miss April, and it's refreshing to see men with the views such as the guest tonight. I love it. I typically, ladies, attract men to my, my platform that have sense. They don't come here looking to argue. They don't come here looking to fuss and fight. Now, every now and again, we might get somebody, but you know, I I get them together, you know, um, real quick, like. But typically men, um, for years when they came to my platform, they didn't come to argue, fuss, and fight. They came to see what is she talking about, and I like this type of woman that she's talking about, but why don't I meet them? So they come to actually listen, and anybody that doesn't, they just gotta skedaddle. That's really what it, what it is. I, I've never gotten the rah-rah crowd ever, ever. It's all— anytime I got rah-rah crowd, it was people that came in that saw something of mine that may have went viral, and then they came in with stuff. But typically, I have— I can say I have men that are evolving. Yes, I love— she said, I love the grown man. Yes, the grown man energy has always been on my platform. And fellas, I appreciate you for that. You don't have to always agree what I say, but— and, and we don't agree with everyone. However, I love the fact that you still come and you still listen and you want to learn more. And I want to see you in love. Yeah, first of all, I'll just say this. Y'all know I got an arsenal of women. I got an arsenal. You know, I have a Love Legacy Academy, which we have probably about, about 400 women in there. And we have my All Things Feminine Social Club, that I have about 400 women in there. So I have an arsenal of women for you fellas that's going through, um, the process and embracing their femininity and becoming better women and breaking bad habits. However, I wonder— I got— y'all gotta get right too in order for me to try to hook y'all up with them. Mm-hmm. That's all. That's how that goes, you know, because I have access and a lot of them right here tonight. She said this was beautiful. Um, what? Hold on, let me go back up. Thank you guys so much. Oh wait, I posted that one already, and I'm learning how to use this, the system. This was a great episode, Miss April. Refreshing to see. Okay, I think I posted that, but thank you guys for coming. This is a podcast I can listen, interact, and get with great gems dropped here. Thank you so much. You— thank you so much for giving up your time, um, tonight. Now we got started a little late, we had to get some things together, but thank you for coming. Um, I love this podcast. To get a man's insight is refreshing. A great first episode. Thank you. My goal— that was my goal. I don't want a whole lot of women talking because We come up with our own stuff sometimes, and we don't always listen to understand. We listen to actually respond. Okay, so you, you all have a wonderful evening. Um, oh, okay, I didn't— oh, I had to push the button. Thank you guys. So, oh, these are some wonderful comments. Thank you so much. This was beautiful. Thank you. And the men who were brave enough to be vulnerable and ask. Yes, we're gonna have more and more men come on. But like I said, I didn't even get to all of these. This is like 12 pages. I didn't even get to all of these. Okay, so we'll be going through those, and I'm sure we'll get more. And ladies, stop sending me questions because it makes my team have to do extra work sifting through your questions. And you know you're not supposed to be over here asking. Ask him. This is for the fellas only. Thank you so much, Instagram. Y'all stayed on here too. Thank you so much. We still have 100 and some odd people on Instagram. I appreciate you. Thank you guys. I thank you for loving the background and everything. Thank you, Candace, if he's still on here, for coming to set up my studio. Hey Gregory, thank you so much. Is that you? What's your— what's your dad's name? Hey Greg, so you are, uh, Blake's dad. Hey Blake's dad, because I'm like, like, somebody has the same last name as you. Thank you so much for tuning in. We will be back next week, same time, and I'll go through these and a whole bunch more. And fellas, I'm looking forward to you calling in, okay, because I want to talk to you. I had fun with this. And another thing with this is it allows me to be in my girl energy. When I'm talking to the fellas, because I have amazing men that call in and they know how to communicate with a lady. Ladies, did you not see that? Did you see how the fellas knew how to communicate with the lady? That's what we want. But there's a certain energy we have to be in as well too in order to get that type of communication. All right, good night.