Wanna know where you stand with someone? Remember this

Hey darlings, April Mason here, and yes, I am still here in Montego Bay on my final vacation after my, what, 3-4 month sabbatical. But listen, I wanted to come in and talk to you really quickly because of a conversation I just had with a lady. And one of the things that she said was she was complaining and wondering why a guy that she is dating was not doing a particular thing, more of not going out. She always had to kind of— she was doing more of the pursuing, right? As well as, you know, when they hung out, everything was good, and, you know, they would go out to dinner and all of this stuff, and she would want a second date, but she wondered why he would never plan a second date. Okay, here's the deal. I'm gonna tell y'all exactly what I told her and why I teach the way I teach in the Teach Me How to Date VIP Academy. VIP Academy. When you understand that people do exactly what they want to do and they do exactly what they don't want to do, you don't have to worry about anything. I teach the ladies in my Academy that we don't date men that are not eager to see us or hesitant to leave us. And because when a man is eager to see you, you never have to worry about if he's going to ask you on a date. You never have to worry about if he's going to, um, pursue you and make time in his schedule for you. You never have to worry about those things when you only deal with people that are eager to see you and hesitant to leave you. And that doesn't— fellas, that doesn't mean that you have— that means you're thirsty. What it means is when you see a woman that you're interested in and you are pursuing her and you making it known that you're interested in her, her job is to reciprocate. I'm not saying that a woman is supposed to just sit back and just let you keep chasing and chasing. No. Although a wise, asset woman knows that when a man is interested in her, he makes himself, uh, makes it known that her job is to reciprocate if that is what— that's what she wants, if she's interested. But here's the deal, I want you to always remember, if you don't remember nothing else, remember people do what they want to do and people do what they don't want to do. So if he's not calling you, if she's not returning, um, your text, if he's not asking you out, if she's not making time in her schedule for you, you never have to ask them or wonder what's going on. They're telling you with their actions because we choose to do exactly what we choose to do and what we choose not to do. So stop running and chasing behind people because people do what they wanna do. And she was just sitting crying, y'all. She was crying all on her sister's shoulder and whatnot. And you know, I do my work wherever I am. I tend to attract the people that need me. So all the way over in Jamaica, the lady over here crying on my shoulder. But it was okay 'cause I wanted her to understand. I said, you put this man on a pedestal and he has not proven that he's deserved to be there. So now you're wondering why he's not pursuing you, and it's because you made him bigger in your mind than what he really is. Because you wouldn't be feeling the way you feel if you had not. And also, you don't have any other quality options. You're not a— you don't have more than one man that you are interested in. Because at the end of the day, I believe, and I teach my ladies about rotational dating. Dating is nothing more than collecting data. Dating is nothing more— I mean, that doesn't mean dating doesn't equal sex. It's just like if I meet 3 strangers in a week, I don't— I'm not gonna not go out with all 3 of them just because I met 3 men in a week. I don't know y'all, y'all strangers. I'm trying to get to know you, and out of all 3, one is going to stand out more than the others, and I'm gonna let the other 2 go. But you don't— you don't give your heart and emotions to strangers. And then for— there's a lot of people that feel like, well, you know, women shouldn't You date multiple men, how do you get to know somebody? It's because you just met 3 strangers. You don't know them like that. So I believe let the best man win. If you want me, come get me. Other than that, I'm going to date who I choose to date until the one I want steps up and I choose him. That's it. So I was explaining this to her. She was like, well, you know, women are always told that they are, they're looked at as loose women or oppose if they date multiple men. I said dating doesn't equal sex. I've always dated multiple men and I wouldn't sleep with them. The thing is, I'm getting to know you, and because I guard my heart and I don't just give away my emotions, I can go out with 5 different dudes in 5 days and then still be able to use discernment and pick out which one has, um, what I need as far as on that next level to go out on the second date. Okay, he's intrigued me enough to go out on the second day. But that don't mean that I meet one today and I meet one tomorrow and I'm— and they both— we see, we hit it off, then I'm not gonna go out with both of them. Not both, both, you know. I don't understand that. So for me, and what I teach, is dating doesn't equal sex. All I'm doing is figuring out which one is the best fit for me. And this is what I was sharing with her. I said, this is how women get caught up. They meet a guy and all of a sudden, you know, they go out on a date, everything is cool, and you get fixated on somebody that ain't fixated on you. Okay, so all of this talk about, you know, women just out to be going out to dinners and all that, man, we can take ourselves out to dinner. You know, a wise woman doesn't use a man to go out to dinner. Matter of fact, we would rather go out to dinner by ourselves than just be dealing with just anybody. I'm very, very particular of who I give my time to. So if it's just a dinner, that means you dating, you dealing with basic women that are just going out with just so they can eat. That, that— I believe that when you get to a stage where you, you say, you know what, I'm ready for something, you stop giving as much of your time to people like that. Now, there will be men out there that, you know, y'all know it ain't going nowhere, but he wants some companionship to have dinner. Well, you got to eat, so you might as well go out. But just to be, just to be going out with men just because you want a dinner, that's basic. But like I said, if it's some companionship, you know, you got a little concert you're going to, but you know it ain't going really going nowhere, but y'all just cool, yeah, go ahead and get you some meat, girl. Go get you some meat. Because you already know what it's not. So these are two different type of women. So no, y'all don't get on my page talking that BS about you telling women to just go get dinner. No, I'm not talking about that one. Y'all so used to the basic woman that you think I'm always talking about the average basic thinking woman. No, I teach women how to be asset women. So an asset woman is not going to spend her time just going out with any and every man just because he wants to take her to dinner. No, we are very selective, very selective. However, even in being selective, if somebody says, you know what, we— I have a— you want to go to dinner? Or they want some company, because I meet men that I know it ain't going nowhere, but that we enjoy each other's company as far as people. And we may say, you know what, I need some companionship to go to dinner. Want to go to dinner? Absolutely. Where we So it— but only grown women and grown men can decipher the two. So I was explaining this to her tonight, that this man that she has made him something in her head that he's not. He has the look, he has the personality, but she doesn't know him. I said, so you over here crying on my shoulder about a man that has not proven anything to you. So you've created what you would like him to be because on the outside he has the image of what you want. On the outside. So now you're sitting here in beautiful Montego Bay tripping over— the man is not tripping over you, okay? So at the end of the day, always remember, people do what they want to do and people do what they don't want to do, okay? That's really what it is. And so you never have to worry, why aren't they calling me? Why aren't they asking me out? Why aren't they making time for me? Why aren't they texting me? That's That's your answer. People do what they want to do and people do what they don't want to do. When you— see, a woman's job is to sit back and see what a man is going to do. Because if you— now, that's if a woman wants an alpha male. Alpha men will come after you, okay? You don't have to pump, pry, and coerce alpha men to come after you, and her job is to sit back and reciprocate. If he is not doing that and you want an alpha male, he just may not be the dude for you. So you never have to ask a person, why aren't you calling? Why aren't you texting? Why aren't you asking me out? Why aren't you making time for me? You never have to ask that. Their action shows you what it is. It's really that simple. So like I teach my ladies in Teach Me How to Date, Sit back, observe. We're always cordial, we're always receptive, but what we're not is stupid, okay? We understand our value, we understand our worth, and we understand our position as a woman. Somebody said you must be new to Miss Mason. Who you talking to, Patricia? Y'all know who If they new to me, y'all go ahead and get them right. Y'all go ahead and get them right because they must have asked a question and it must be a question about a basic chick because I talk about two different types of women. I don't talk about— I want you to understand that when I'm talking about a woman, I'm talking about an asset woman. If you do not know who I am and what I'm about, you might want to go through my videos and understand that I'm not talking about the basic woman. If you ask me something stupid like, "What is the woman supposed to do?" or "What if these women just want to be going out and just getting something to eat and making a man spend his money?" You're new to me. So you might want to go ahead and do your reads, darling. Okay? So at the end of the day, and if you wonder why, you know, why would I date more than one man at a time, it's because dating is nothing more than collecting data. So you might want to go through my videos. Dating, that's what it is. There's a difference between dating and being exclusive and courting somebody. When you start, as they call it, courting somebody, you would have already selected who that person is going to be out of your dating pool, and you would shut everything else down. Some of y'all are— think y'all in exclusive relationships with people that are not in exclusive relationships with you, okay? Um, somebody said he asked if you could date more than one man. Oh yeah, absolutely. Yeah, because dating does I make the sex. Just like a man is vetting me, I'm vetting him too. And just like he's vetting multiples, I'm vetting multiples too. But once again, we have put sex and everything else on the forefront that we act like we can't go out with more than one person. And most of my— I would say 95% of the women that are my clients, that that's the biggest issue that they have. And I was explaining that to the ladies tonight. You have a problem going out with more than one man because you met one at Walmart today, but then you went one at Target, um, um, you know, on Friday. But you feel like you would not do— you're doing a disservice, or that you're cheating, or not being truthful to the one you just met at Target because you went to one a couple of days ago at, uh, Walmart. But these are two strangers. Two strangers. You don't know what he got going on in his life, uh, when you just meet him, and you're automatically giving away your exclusivity to somebody that has not earned it. If you want me on If you want me off the market, take me off the market. Let you— that's what it really should be, you know. It really should be that if somebody wants you, they will do what they need to do to have you. But too many women, like the woman I was talking about tonight, giving away their exclusivity and then wondering why the man is not pursuing. It's because you've made him something in your mind that he is not. And so now you, like I said, you're sitting here in beautiful Montego Bay crying over this April show. We're not gonna do that. So John said— hold on, a man had something to say. Let me see what John said. Y'all know I got my blue glasses. John said if a man does not pursue a woman, he is either too shy to do so or he is just not interested in a woman. I agree, John. Um, it could be, it could be that because I have, I have even dealt with men that were, um, too shy to pursue because of their perception of me and not feeling like I would actually like them. And I'm like, well, what is it? Because of, you know, how the pedestal they put me on. But when they got to learn that, okay, yeah, she got a little pedestal, but she's actually a down-to-earth woman, or they get the, I don't know if I can maintain that, or it's the, um, I have to, I have to move differently with her than what I'm accustomed to doing. So How do I move differently with her? I have had that happen, so I would agree, John, that, you know, the shy guy could be that way. And we can only take the shy for so long, okay? And even a shy guy will let his interest be known. So it might not be on that like a straight, you know, non-shy man would do, but even A shy guy is going to let a man— let it be known. I've had guys say to me, you know, give you like little innuendos, but I could tell that they were just shy. And it was like, uh, even some of my male friends had to remind me, April, you gotta understand, some of the men that you have liked and they didn't come at you like you're accustomed to, you're still in their eyes a gomaza. So it could be, what does she want with me. I've dealt that. I've dealt with that, so I get it. But even still, there was a little something in there that let me know. I said, okay, he like me. I just gotta— but this one, I'm gonna have to come at him a different way. So I will say yes, but the shy guy will still put his feelers out in his shy guy way. So don't let it be like you just— you just so shy that he can't— no, we don't want nobody that's that shy that can't say nothing. But anywho, um, a man will pursue you, bottom line, you know, if he's interested, no matter if he's shocked or matter— or if he's not shocked. But at the end of the day, all you need to know is that a person will do what they want to do and not do what they do not want to do. So you never have to wonder. If you ever want to wonder where a person stands or where you stand with them, always remember they're doing exact doing exactly what they want to do. Nope, ladies, stop asking these men all of these freaking questions, um, um, of, uh, why you don't call me, why you don't ask me out, why you don't— we don't worry about no stupid stuff like that. That's not what we worry about. We don't worry about why nobody's calling us and why nobody's asking us out. Why? Because we have a bunch of other quality men vying for our attention. So if what you're not doing— please understand, what's out of place will be replaced. It's really that simple. But when it's— you only get anxious and worried about what a person is doing or not doing when you put them in the place in your mind that they haven't earned to be, when you've given them emotions and feelings that they have not earned. That's really what it is, to be honest with you. So live your life, enjoy your life, and there's somebody that you can actually be, you know, like or whatnot. But if they're not pursuing you, they're doing exactly what they do not want to do. And I know it sounds cut and dry, but I, I want you to get out of your head and stop making excuses for people. That's what we do, we make excuses, um, for people people. And like I said, most of the women that find— women that come up across— I come across, or women I meet in passing, or, um, even clients, they always wonder why the man ain't doing something. I'm like, yeah, because they don't want to. It's really that simple. And it's like, then the self-esteem issues start. Well, why would he want to do that with me? What's wrong with me? It's nothing wrong with you. How many men have you rejected because they didn't do for you, or maybe you weren't in the mindset of, uh, uh, wanting to be in a relationship, or you thought you weren't good enough for him, so the energy that you put out pushed him away. It's really that simple. But when you have multiple quality options vying for your attention, you don't get caught up like that. You don't. So that's what I wanted to share with I promise you, people do what they want to do and people do what they don't want to do. You know? That— and the thing is, you could be the one for that person. Maybe just for them, it's not at that time because— but that's a whole nother video because I don't believe in timing the same way people do. Only time— when people say, "Oh, it's bad timing," it's only bad timing because you're putting something else in front of that or it's only bad timing because you don't want to put in the effort that it takes to pursue or to get to know somebody, or that person ain't worth it to you. But it's not about bad timing, because timing— whatever we put as that, that thing that's the time that's taking up the time, we're choosing to let that thing take the time. Whether it's, oh, I can't date right now cuz I'm in school— well, you're saying I cannot have a balanced life. You're saying, oh, 'Oh, you know, I work all of these hours and blah blah blah blah blah.' But what you're saying is my job is more important than me having some time for you. But I'm choosing to make that important and you're not worth it to me. That's really what it is. That's really, that's really what it is. Anytime anybody say that to me, to me, unless you are in a marriage, anything else is what you are giving your time and emotions to. That's really it. Oh, I just, I just lost everything in my, you know, in my life. You know, I just lost my house, my car, blah blah blah blah blah. I can't date right now until I get back on my feet. Well, you're putting being back on your feet as the priority, but it doesn't mean you can't get back on your feet and meet somebody at the same time too. Hell, that person can help you get back on your feet. That's all I'm saying. So, but a lot of people— somebody said you have to set your priorities to things that are worth it, but most people don't put value on relationships. You know, most women end up in their 40s, 50s, and 60s not having any quality options, never being married, because they put their priority on, you know, getting their, you know, education and all of this stuff. And then now they older, they had no kids, ain't done nothing, not realizing you could have done— you know, you can do two, you can do both. You can do both. So I'm just saying, you know, it's not about it's bad timing. Oh, my kids are this and that and the third. No, you put your kids in check. Your kids don't put you in check. Your kids don't govern your life. Oh, I got to do this, I got to do that, I got to do this, I got to make all these brunch for the kids. I got— no, no, you're choosing to do that. It's what you're choosing to do. So at the end of the day, if, uh, let me get out of here cuz the party getting ready to start. But at the end of the day, if you want to be in something, you want to make it a priority. Or you want to make excuses, because there's no such thing as the perfect time. If you feel like you lose the weight— when do we feel like we want to lose weight? You don't. You— it's a choice. Everything in life is a choice. So men and women both have excuses. I meet so many women talk about how busy they are. Okay, well, don't a man want to— a man that's looking for something doesn't want a so busy woman. Just like I wouldn't date a man that's always busy, you know, and all he hides behind is his busyness. That's to me, people that hide behind that, that's their way of numbing themselves from having to actually feel. That's a whole nother video, but I'll be back full time for show, y'all, coming soon. But anywho, love y'all, just wanted to share that with you. Once again, it was people do what they want to do and people do what they don't want to do. If you ever want to know where you stand with a person, it has everything to do with them choosing to do something. No matter what excuse they give you, 'Oh, this happened or that happened.' I get it, but you still chose to not do this, or you still chose to not do that. It's really what it is. It's really that simple. That will help you. I hope that helped you, because like I said, too many people be wondering, you know, stuff, and it's like, you don't have to wonder. People do what they want to do. That's it. Say it with me: people do what they want to do, and people don't do what they don't want to do. So gotta go, the party is starting, and it's a beautiful night here in Montego Bay. So I'm gonna go over there on the beach and, um, see what I can get into. Bye!